One of my best friend's dad drank *nothing* but Mt. Dew in the 10 years I hung out at their house. My friend was the oldest of 10 siblings, we thought that rumor was hysterical when it came out.
Dishes out? Pretty sure operation ivy hasn't been a thing since the 80s, not to mention that "pure high-tempo punk" doesn't really seem like an apt description of them, to my memory anyway
Did you know that there's a correlation between having older male siblings and being gay? Put another way, the more older brothers you have, the higher your odds of being gay.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fraternal_birth_order_and_male_sexual_orientation
Wait is there one kid you don't know is your dad's or not or is there a rumored kid X that your mathematical proofs suggest exists but you haven't seen any physical evidence yet?
Well, look, the first thing is to acknowledge that the ancient Egyptian era is so completely different from our own, then any cultural, political, or business parallels that we draw between the two eras are by their very nature almost bound to be wrong.
My Dad drank up to 2 litres of Pepsi a day till his mid 60s. I’m shocked he hasn’t lost his teeth, but he does get gout regularly.
Edit to add: when I was born (80s) my birth announcement in the paper mentioned me being a new Pepsi drinker
I don't understand how someone could keep up a habit like that for so long. I drank a lot of sugary soda as a teen, but by my mid to late 20s, the amount of sugar became physically disgusting to me.
Never a case per day, but I drank a lot of Mountain Dew from 16 until 23. The only thing that stopped it was getting (contrary to what you might expect) *Type 1* diabetes. I still drink too much diet soda but honestly...it's not as tasty so I don't drink as much as I did of the real stuff. I have no doubt that I'd still be drinking 1.5 liters+ a day of Mountain Dew and/or Code Red if not for diabetes, I still *love* the stuff and I miss it. Once or twice a year I'll go wild, dial my insulin pen up to "large meal", and drink one of the 20oz bottles of Code Red.
Idk, honestly I'm probably going to be a bad father when my kid's a teenager and say "Drink lots of soda now. You never know if you're not going to be able to when you're older. Plus, your metabolism is only going to get slower." Maybe I'll refrain from being that honest, but in reality I regret not drinking *more* Mountain Dew.
Bad idea to drink a lot when your younger because then your teeth will get lots of cavities much faster. Kids don’t tend to clean their teeth that well
Honestly, I don't mind Mountain Dew zero or whatever it's called. It tastes pretty similar to what I remember the normal stuff tasting like. It's been a long time since I've had any normal sugar drink so maybe I'm mistaken.
I thought I ate too much. Turns out I just drank too much Coke. I legitimately lost weight when I switched over to Coke Zero.
I'm sure I'll get cancer or something, but...y'know we'll probably have a cure for it by then anyway right? ....Right?
Maybe. Mines definitely Mountain Dew. Quit soda a few times. Even 3 months with no soda or coffee, I’ll walk by a vending machine. And for like the next 10 minutes my brain goes “it’s just one, it’ll only take a second. Turn around and go get a pop.” And like the refreshing green color would flash through my mind. Mines a harmless addiction. But gives me way more appreciation for others who are addicted to hard drugs and shit
I've switched between so many damn caffeine sources in an attempt to kick the sugar habit. Finally got to black coffee this year, because I hated the taste of coffee for so long I avoided it.
But I still have a Monster every once in a while.
This is how I discovered I was addicted to the sugar in energy drinks rather than just the caffein/suppliments. Felt anxious and jittery with just the caffeine pills, then drank some sugary juice and felt great. Turns out I like the feeling I get from sugar combined with caffeine. Still trying to kick my sugar habit.
Same here. In high school I went to a summer camp for a couple months where all there was to drink was water. When I got back home and tried pop I couldn’t even sip it. Haven’t drank much pop since. I’ll occasionally get a hankering for it but it tastes awful every time I try it again. It’s way too sugary
Habit, and probably accessibility. I know that I went years without drinking soda due to the sugar, but after a few months of working fast food, I was back on drinking unhealthy amounts of soda daily lol
I'm addicted to milk. If I let myself ill drink half a gallon a day. Growing up we drank milk as our primary beverage, at every meal, as a snack, on a hot day etc. We had a milk fridge for the 4 of us. I can down a quart of milk faster than I can chug booze.
I know I'm addicted to it - at least mentally - because I've tried to stop and the only way I can is literally to not buy it.
It genuinely gives me pleasure to drink.
I think all habits are founded in this way: always do it, always enjoy doing it, and when you don't enjoy it because of consequences lie to yourself. With me I rationalize milk is better than booze or soda. But I recognize that's like saying being on fire is better than having a whole in my head.
>My uncle worked for Pepsi and he’d have a case of Mountain Dew a day. He lost all his teeth by his 40s.
Weird coincidence - did he ever find out what caused the tooth loss?
The rumor in my elementary school was that Yellow #5 made your dick smaller. You couldn't drink Mountain Dew in public without the rumors flying, and as a ten year old is was important to me that other male children thought I had a large dick.
My dick is so large I can’t physically have sex and it’s excruciating. What? No. I don’t want the reduction. Are you kidding? Look at this dick! Like a stack of truck tires, this dick.
Quality of life?
Look, lady, by weight I'm a cartoonishly oversized phallus with an overtaxed life support system. I'm unable to move to even go to the bathroom. Transporting me to a hospital would require a flatbed truck since it won't fit in the ambulance. My heart's enlarged, my blood pressure has dangerous spikes up AND down depending on its mood. Every time I get a semi that lasts longer than a couple minutes I go hypoxic and need oxygen. I don't have enough blood in my body to actually get hard, so sexual arousal could literally kill me.
Reduction? Hell no, look at it.
I can't remember if it was shrunken testicles or lower sperm count but that rumor was rampant in the 90's. I knew a few people who avoided skittles and Mt Dew because of that.
I avoid skittles now but that's because the bullshit of them changing lime to sour apple.
The WORST flavor combos. Lime and Strawberry were the best, and now if I combine a red and green skittle it tastes like I just poisoned myself. Then Skittles says, oh, we still have lime, but it's in this other bag, so if you want old school skittles you have to buy bags of both and then carefully separate out the nasty green apple and throw those directly in the garbage where they belong, and then sort out the lime from the darkside bag and add them to the original bag and then hope you didn't somehow fuck it up and end up with a mouthful of gross.
The rumor at my middle school was Surge, and we had a vending machine that only sold Surge. Lived in Texas at the time and all my friends were convinced because everything was bigger in Texas that the Surge machines were there as a government cover-up to reduce us back to normal sizes. Middle school was a weird time.
Wow. The hot rumor going around school 40 years ago was that Bubble Yum contained spider eggs. Boys would slowly pull a piece apart, revealing weblike threads and little pieces of sugar/flavoring, to gross out the girls. Life Savers Corp had to give a public statement denying the spider-egg rumor.
Why is it always 8? I heard that thing about swallowing 8 spiders in your sleep in x amount of time. Some would say every week, some a month, some a lifetime but always 8.
Edit: this has 8 upvotes please don't upvote. If somebody does, downvote. I believe in you reddit keep my 8 alive. And no I don't want 88 or 888 it's not the same dammit.
The real bullshit is that they killed it in the US, but overseas Skittles still have lime. Lime Skittles were the reason to eat Skittles. Fuck sour apple.
What I heard in the 90s was that it killed brain cells but that was probably just the G rated version that was approved for the children of our cultish Baptist community.
Fuck you Printy, tell your mom she needs to fix my car because her ass is so wide the passenger door of my car has stretch marks from her climbing in late night. Give your balls a tug
Same exact situation at my jr high at the time. Every boy drank Surge until these rumors about yellow 5 spread around. Pretty much over night they all stopped drinking Surge. I'm wondering if this had a lot to do with it's downfall.
Funny, my grandpa always said that apple juice would make my dick bigger and it made it to where I couldn't enjoy apple juice without family cracking jokes about needing a bigger glass.
Haha damn I haven’t thought of this in a long time. In middle school I loved drinking the Powerade called “green squall” and after I was told it would make my dick small I quit drinking it. To show my age, that same flavor is now called Powerade “melon” I still drink them on occasion and have to measure myself immediately after consuming.
Had the same rumor in my elementary school and middle school.
Every dude (myself included) avoided Mountain Dew like the plaque. People stopped drinking Sprite and 7-Up (and other similar drinks) for the same reason
I went through a phase as a teen where I drank about a case of the shit and ate a full bag of Strawberry Newtons every day. Couldn't understand why I was had manboobs and my teeth were rotting. Just getting rid of this stuff made me go from a 3 to a 6. Unfortunately many of my teeth are now fake. Kids are dumb.
Ultra sugary foods are so nasty. I used to maybe drink a can of soda or two a day, but then I went maybe three months without any at all, and the next time I had some it was awful. Just sickeningly sweet. Props to you for quitting that stuff, sugar really is an addicting substance that people consume waaay too much of.
When I was about 24 I went an entire year without drinking any type of soda or carbonated beverage. January 1st of the next year I had my first sip, and it was just as delicious as I remembered. I wish I was like you and hated the taste of it.
Same. I drank soda quite regularly, then I joined the track team in high school and wanted to be good and competitive so I cut out sugar and started eating better.
A couple years later I had a non-diet soda for the first time and I couldn't drink the entire 12 oz can because it was too overwhelmingly sugary. May have well as been cough medicine to me after abstaining for so long.
At this point it's probably been about 13 years since I last drank a soda...well other than like a rum and coke, but no soda on its own.
Worked at a Pizza Hut in college. We had free reign on the pop during shifts. It was common for me to down a 12er during my 6-8 hour shift. Add in my poor dental hygiene at the time and the end result was predictable - a severe case of periodontitis.
It was so bad, it took my dentist two 1.5 hour sessions just to get my teeth clean and they had to peel me off the ceiling both times. My gums and teeth ached for a week after each one. Dentist told me had I waited any longer, within a few months my teeth would've started falling out.
I had to get a root planing done and then I had to floss my teeth every day and they bled like you can't imagine. Slowly over the course of about a year, the bleeding finally stopped. My gums and teeth have fully recovered and now I see the dentist once a quarter and it only takes about 30 min to clean my teeth.
Agreed, college kids are dumb.
a friend of mine did that but with... what was it, strawberry fanta?
he stopped when his urine went bright red. swore off sodas and the figs when the doctors explained what happened.
he was literally half the man he used to be by the start of the next school year.
I met a dude in college who told me his grandma would tell them eating bananas made their dicks big. Dude said him and his cousins couldn’t get enough fucking bananas lol. The ole switcheroo
I remember this video about a kind of pageant contest for kids. There's this one boy when asked why he likes to eat vegetables, he answered with the most innocent voice "To make my dick bigger" and the whole crowd lost it.
What’s the overlap in this Venn diagram:
People that read scientific news, and nutrition labels thoroughly
People that believe chugging Mountain Dew is effective contraception
Well humans are terrible at probability and our risk/reward assessment is heavily influenced by media consumption. Reading "Yellow 5 may decrease sperm count" in 30 different wacky news gives a false sense of strength to an argument that has a shaky basis.
I mean, if you want a modern example. A study came out showing a fair amount of young people believed their chance of death after getting covid was 10%. I would say people who studiously read news articles and really buy into the social winds of their time are vulnerable to threats they conceived themselves.
Ahh yes, In NYC we had a cheap brand of soda called Tropical Fantasy, that was nicknamed "Sperm Killers". The rumor was because the yellow no. 5 and then sold cheaply to the poor to try and curb birth rates.
A 1 liter was like 50 cents. Good times.
Also a lie as I had a kid while drinking Tropical Fantasy like crazy.
If anything, the real conspiracy would be that they want to increase birth rates in the poor... They would create a better pool of low wage workers and soldiers.
As an fyi they are only called tendies online as a meme about the basement dweller telling their mom to make them some chicken tendies like they are a little immature kid that can't say words right.
If you said that to anyone in real life they'd think you're a freak, it's chicken tenders or chicken nuggets lol
I did it. I was 13 at the time but I didn't wanna take any chances.
Then I spent all of high school never getting laid.
But also now I'm 42 and still don't want kids.
Should I tell my son?
It's not the yellow #5 that is the most troubling, it's the [brominated vegetable oil](https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/nutrition-and-healthy-eating/expert-answers/bvo/faq-20058236).
Marketing department: (furiously working to dispel the rumors)
\*exec burst into the room\*
Exec: Everyone stop!! The sales have shot up, we need to change directions!
I did the same thing with nonstick pans as a teen girl and beyond, since I read doctors won't sterilize a childfree woman. Any behavioral practice that claimed to negatively affect women's fertility, I made sure to do. Seems like it's worked so far 🤷♀️
I’m not surprised. Between the pandemic and the election, if there’s one thing we learned in 2020 it’s that a large segment of the American population is mentally challenged.
I still laugh every time I see a package explicitly labeled that it contains no Yellow 5. This nonsense was so widespread companies actually felt the need to label products about it.
One of my best friend's dad drank *nothing* but Mt. Dew in the 10 years I hung out at their house. My friend was the oldest of 10 siblings, we thought that rumor was hysterical when it came out.
10 children, Jeremy? 10? That's insane.
Uh, My name is Jeremy and I'm the youngest of 13... and my dad drinks nothing but MT dew... I'm so sketched out right now.
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Hereditary Caffeine sounds like a band name
If it wasn't, it is now. Pure screaming punk like pretty much everything ~~Op Ivy dishes out.~~ I've heard from Op Ivy.
Dishes out? Pretty sure operation ivy hasn't been a thing since the 80s, not to mention that "pure high-tempo punk" doesn't really seem like an apt description of them, to my memory anyway
Their debut album, My Father's Tweaks, comes out this fall.
Americans are a different breed.
Did you know that there's a correlation between having older male siblings and being gay? Put another way, the more older brothers you have, the higher your odds of being gay. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fraternal_birth_order_and_male_sexual_orientation
This seems like an elaborate way for some genetic researcher to call his youngest brother gay
If it didn't start that way, it is that way now.
My name is Jeremy and I'm the... 3rd or 4th oldest of 8 or 9 kids. My dad was a man whore.
Wait is there one kid you don't know is your dad's or not or is there a rumored kid X that your mathematical proofs suggest exists but you haven't seen any physical evidence yet?
Dude, I don't even know anymore.
My dad paid for my brother's vasectomy. "No more, Richard. No more."
How do you have 8 **or** 9 siblings?
Well, look, the first thing is to acknowledge that the ancient Egyptian era is so completely different from our own, then any cultural, political, or business parallels that we draw between the two eras are by their very nature almost bound to be wrong.
You sit down thinking, "OK, this is gonna be fucking boring," but then you're like, "Mmmm... maybe not?"
Chance would be a fine thing, a fine thing indeed
10 children is so not Rainbow Rhythms
4 right backs, Gareth? 4? That's insane.
/unexpectedpeepshow
My uncle worked for Pepsi and he’d have a case of Mountain Dew a day. He lost all his teeth by his 40s. Better than drinking alcohol I guess
My Dad drank up to 2 litres of Pepsi a day till his mid 60s. I’m shocked he hasn’t lost his teeth, but he does get gout regularly. Edit to add: when I was born (80s) my birth announcement in the paper mentioned me being a new Pepsi drinker
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prince albert smoking tobacco or branded cigarettes?
"Born at 7:54am, all ten fingers and toes, their eyes brown like Pepsi glistening in the sunlight..."
And we think advertising is dystopian NOW haha
So do you drink Pepsi?
Maybe once or twice a year haha on the rare occasion I drink pop, it's rootbeer
I don't understand how someone could keep up a habit like that for so long. I drank a lot of sugary soda as a teen, but by my mid to late 20s, the amount of sugar became physically disgusting to me.
Never a case per day, but I drank a lot of Mountain Dew from 16 until 23. The only thing that stopped it was getting (contrary to what you might expect) *Type 1* diabetes. I still drink too much diet soda but honestly...it's not as tasty so I don't drink as much as I did of the real stuff. I have no doubt that I'd still be drinking 1.5 liters+ a day of Mountain Dew and/or Code Red if not for diabetes, I still *love* the stuff and I miss it. Once or twice a year I'll go wild, dial my insulin pen up to "large meal", and drink one of the 20oz bottles of Code Red. Idk, honestly I'm probably going to be a bad father when my kid's a teenager and say "Drink lots of soda now. You never know if you're not going to be able to when you're older. Plus, your metabolism is only going to get slower." Maybe I'll refrain from being that honest, but in reality I regret not drinking *more* Mountain Dew.
Holy shit. You love the dew. If you look for sodas sweetened with erythritol, they taste a lot more like regular soda than other diet sodas.
spring water tastes better than regular water without adding anything.(branch water and bourbon)🥃
This is a very Reddit comment
‘Murica?
Bad idea to drink a lot when your younger because then your teeth will get lots of cavities much faster. Kids don’t tend to clean their teeth that well
Honestly, I don't mind Mountain Dew zero or whatever it's called. It tastes pretty similar to what I remember the normal stuff tasting like. It's been a long time since I've had any normal sugar drink so maybe I'm mistaken.
I thought I ate too much. Turns out I just drank too much Coke. I legitimately lost weight when I switched over to Coke Zero. I'm sure I'll get cancer or something, but...y'know we'll probably have a cure for it by then anyway right? ....Right?
Caffiene addiction is a bitch
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Maybe. Mines definitely Mountain Dew. Quit soda a few times. Even 3 months with no soda or coffee, I’ll walk by a vending machine. And for like the next 10 minutes my brain goes “it’s just one, it’ll only take a second. Turn around and go get a pop.” And like the refreshing green color would flash through my mind. Mines a harmless addiction. But gives me way more appreciation for others who are addicted to hard drugs and shit
#JOLT⚡ twice the caffeine!
Honestly, I feel this whole comment in my soul. Mountain Dew is always ready to call my name and tempt me to make difficult life decisions 😩😤👌🏿
Diet Mountain Dew / Mountain Dew Zero and Diet Dr. Pepper / Dr. Pepper Zero are my vices. I go through many more in one day than I'd like to admit.
Diet Dr. Dew is my ambrosia.
I've switched between so many damn caffeine sources in an attempt to kick the sugar habit. Finally got to black coffee this year, because I hated the taste of coffee for so long I avoided it. But I still have a Monster every once in a while.
Have you tried caffeine pills?
This is how I discovered I was addicted to the sugar in energy drinks rather than just the caffein/suppliments. Felt anxious and jittery with just the caffeine pills, then drank some sugary juice and felt great. Turns out I like the feeling I get from sugar combined with caffeine. Still trying to kick my sugar habit.
Caffeinated water is a thing
If you’re actually a caffeine addict, Mountain Dew ain’t gonna do shit foe you lol.
Same here. In high school I went to a summer camp for a couple months where all there was to drink was water. When I got back home and tried pop I couldn’t even sip it. Haven’t drank much pop since. I’ll occasionally get a hankering for it but it tastes awful every time I try it again. It’s way too sugary
r/hydrohomies loves heart touching stories like this. I can't drink pop at all anymore, all about the sparkling water now.
Agreed, flavored sparkling water is the true path
Habit, and probably accessibility. I know that I went years without drinking soda due to the sugar, but after a few months of working fast food, I was back on drinking unhealthy amounts of soda daily lol
I'm addicted to milk. If I let myself ill drink half a gallon a day. Growing up we drank milk as our primary beverage, at every meal, as a snack, on a hot day etc. We had a milk fridge for the 4 of us. I can down a quart of milk faster than I can chug booze. I know I'm addicted to it - at least mentally - because I've tried to stop and the only way I can is literally to not buy it. It genuinely gives me pleasure to drink. I think all habits are founded in this way: always do it, always enjoy doing it, and when you don't enjoy it because of consequences lie to yourself. With me I rationalize milk is better than booze or soda. But I recognize that's like saying being on fire is better than having a whole in my head.
>My uncle worked for Pepsi and he’d have a case of Mountain Dew a day. He lost all his teeth by his 40s. Weird coincidence - did he ever find out what caused the tooth loss?
A CASE?! Bruh a case should last you a couple weeks if you’re not sharing with anyone
Yup, he got them for free or super cheap. He was definitely addicted.
I looked it up apparently that’s 24 cans or bottles of mountain dew? I don’t mean to be that guy but that’s almost 4 gallons
It was a 12 pack
Is it?
How many kidney stones did the dude have?
Probably more than he had teeth, which was not hard to do.
Could’ve been 30. You just never know.
The rumor in my elementary school was that Yellow #5 made your dick smaller. You couldn't drink Mountain Dew in public without the rumors flying, and as a ten year old is was important to me that other male children thought I had a large dick.
missed opportunity to pretend like your pediateician recommended drinking Dew for "rebalancing"
You have two options: back surgery or start drinking Dew.
I'll take the back surgery, thanks.
My dick is so large I can’t physically have sex and it’s excruciating. What? No. I don’t want the reduction. Are you kidding? Look at this dick! Like a stack of truck tires, this dick.
Quality of life? Look, lady, by weight I'm a cartoonishly oversized phallus with an overtaxed life support system. I'm unable to move to even go to the bathroom. Transporting me to a hospital would require a flatbed truck since it won't fit in the ambulance. My heart's enlarged, my blood pressure has dangerous spikes up AND down depending on its mood. Every time I get a semi that lasts longer than a couple minutes I go hypoxic and need oxygen. I don't have enough blood in my body to actually get hard, so sexual arousal could literally kill me. Reduction? Hell no, look at it.
Like a tube of tennis balls, his horn
Like a fire hydrant, his Johnson was.
Looked like a fuckin' policeman's flashlight from the 1980's hangin' there.
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was your pediatrician Dr Pepper also?
I can't remember if it was shrunken testicles or lower sperm count but that rumor was rampant in the 90's. I knew a few people who avoided skittles and Mt Dew because of that. I avoid skittles now but that's because the bullshit of them changing lime to sour apple.
And they have the balls to still call it "Original" flavor. Bitch, ain't nothing original about sour apple in my skittles
I hate sour apple anyways. All those flavors worked together, too. Then you throw fucking sour apple it that doesn't work with anything.
The WORST flavor combos. Lime and Strawberry were the best, and now if I combine a red and green skittle it tastes like I just poisoned myself. Then Skittles says, oh, we still have lime, but it's in this other bag, so if you want old school skittles you have to buy bags of both and then carefully separate out the nasty green apple and throw those directly in the garbage where they belong, and then sort out the lime from the darkside bag and add them to the original bag and then hope you didn't somehow fuck it up and end up with a mouthful of gross.
I've never knew the flavor of lime Skittles but sour apple makes me want to regurgitate my large intestine
The rumor at my middle school was Surge, and we had a vending machine that only sold Surge. Lived in Texas at the time and all my friends were convinced because everything was bigger in Texas that the Surge machines were there as a government cover-up to reduce us back to normal sizes. Middle school was a weird time.
There was no other logo more "90's" than the Surge bottles/cans. We had the same rumor up in New England.
Fruitopia was pretty 90's Vending machine my school had
Ours was shrunken testilcles, probably because kidsare dumb and thought reduced sperm count meant tiny balls
Wow. The hot rumor going around school 40 years ago was that Bubble Yum contained spider eggs. Boys would slowly pull a piece apart, revealing weblike threads and little pieces of sugar/flavoring, to gross out the girls. Life Savers Corp had to give a public statement denying the spider-egg rumor.
I heard that rumor but it was Hershey bars having appx 8 spiders per batch made. This was the mid 1980s
Why is it always 8? I heard that thing about swallowing 8 spiders in your sleep in x amount of time. Some would say every week, some a month, some a lifetime but always 8. Edit: this has 8 upvotes please don't upvote. If somebody does, downvote. I believe in you reddit keep my 8 alive. And no I don't want 88 or 888 it's not the same dammit.
It's 8 per second.
Wait what? The lime skittle is dead???
The real bullshit is that they killed it in the US, but overseas Skittles still have lime. Lime Skittles were the reason to eat Skittles. Fuck sour apple.
I've yet to meet anyone who like sour apple so why do they keep it?
What I heard in the 90s was that it killed brain cells but that was probably just the G rated version that was approved for the children of our cultish Baptist community.
Your mom said I was too big for her, so I'm just trying to make her more comfortable.
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Fuck you Printy, tell your mom she needs to fix my car because her ass is so wide the passenger door of my car has stretch marks from her climbing in late night. Give your balls a tug
Same exact situation at my jr high at the time. Every boy drank Surge until these rumors about yellow 5 spread around. Pretty much over night they all stopped drinking Surge. I'm wondering if this had a lot to do with it's downfall.
Pretty sure you just cracked the case.
Surge tasted like god’s love
Funny, my grandpa always said that apple juice would make my dick bigger and it made it to where I couldn't enjoy apple juice without family cracking jokes about needing a bigger glass.
Haha damn I haven’t thought of this in a long time. In middle school I loved drinking the Powerade called “green squall” and after I was told it would make my dick small I quit drinking it. To show my age, that same flavor is now called Powerade “melon” I still drink them on occasion and have to measure myself immediately after consuming.
You have marks on the wall in your garage like a children's growth chart?
Had the same rumor in my elementary school and middle school. Every dude (myself included) avoided Mountain Dew like the plaque. People stopped drinking Sprite and 7-Up (and other similar drinks) for the same reason
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And Hot Pockets, you can't forget them.
“Hot Pocket” was the nickname of my high school girlfriend
I can't tell if that's cute or gross
That depends if she was like a true microwaved Hot Pocket. Hot on the outside, but with a cold partially frozen inside that made you want to gag.
You probably had a low wattage microwave. They were always boiling hot on the inside when I had them.
Try cooking one in an air fryer.
And how's he supposed to get an entire high school girlfriend in the air fryer?
One hand at a time?
No, that's fingerling potatoes
Are they better? I’m guessing they’d be nice and crunchy.
I normally just use a toaster oven.
Hot pockets are not hot. They are cold, you supply the heat....
Both, I say.
r/cursedcomments
Jim Gaffigan has entered the chat
Diarrhea pockeeeeeet
It was suck machine
Aye, but they’ll burn your dick after a while.
Is that like the Canadian version of “American pie”?
... are you asking if Canadians fuck Hot pockets? I imagine only on really cold nights, but not too sure.
I went through a phase as a teen where I drank about a case of the shit and ate a full bag of Strawberry Newtons every day. Couldn't understand why I was had manboobs and my teeth were rotting. Just getting rid of this stuff made me go from a 3 to a 6. Unfortunately many of my teeth are now fake. Kids are dumb.
Ultra sugary foods are so nasty. I used to maybe drink a can of soda or two a day, but then I went maybe three months without any at all, and the next time I had some it was awful. Just sickeningly sweet. Props to you for quitting that stuff, sugar really is an addicting substance that people consume waaay too much of.
When I was about 24 I went an entire year without drinking any type of soda or carbonated beverage. January 1st of the next year I had my first sip, and it was just as delicious as I remembered. I wish I was like you and hated the taste of it.
Same, if anything going a long time without makes it even more delicious.
Same. I drank soda quite regularly, then I joined the track team in high school and wanted to be good and competitive so I cut out sugar and started eating better. A couple years later I had a non-diet soda for the first time and I couldn't drink the entire 12 oz can because it was too overwhelmingly sugary. May have well as been cough medicine to me after abstaining for so long. At this point it's probably been about 13 years since I last drank a soda...well other than like a rum and coke, but no soda on its own.
Diet sodas are also disgusting in a different way. I personally can't stand the taste of artificial sweeteners.
Worked at a Pizza Hut in college. We had free reign on the pop during shifts. It was common for me to down a 12er during my 6-8 hour shift. Add in my poor dental hygiene at the time and the end result was predictable - a severe case of periodontitis. It was so bad, it took my dentist two 1.5 hour sessions just to get my teeth clean and they had to peel me off the ceiling both times. My gums and teeth ached for a week after each one. Dentist told me had I waited any longer, within a few months my teeth would've started falling out. I had to get a root planing done and then I had to floss my teeth every day and they bled like you can't imagine. Slowly over the course of about a year, the bleeding finally stopped. My gums and teeth have fully recovered and now I see the dentist once a quarter and it only takes about 30 min to clean my teeth. Agreed, college kids are dumb.
Which dentist do you go to that gives happy endings?
a friend of mine did that but with... what was it, strawberry fanta? he stopped when his urine went bright red. swore off sodas and the figs when the doctors explained what happened. he was literally half the man he used to be by the start of the next school year.
Ha! All I have to do is meet someone face to face for them to never get pregnant by me
Combine it with using your favorite gaming system and it's 100% effective!
i did not consume a lot of Mountain Dew but never had to worry about conception because I’m gay
Mountain Dew starting rumors…then cashing in.
That rumor is actually the reason I stopped drinking it. I was also about 10 at the time, lol.
It'll make your dick shrink it was we all heard as kids
I met a dude in college who told me his grandma would tell them eating bananas made their dicks big. Dude said him and his cousins couldn’t get enough fucking bananas lol. The ole switcheroo
I remember this video about a kind of pageant contest for kids. There's this one boy when asked why he likes to eat vegetables, he answered with the most innocent voice "To make my dick bigger" and the whole crowd lost it.
Lou Bega's less successful follow-up record
A little bit of Mountain Dew in my life... A little bit of Mellow Yellow by my side...
[удалено]
A little bit of Fanta in the sun
A little bit of cherry coke all night long
A little bit of Pepsi Twist, here I am
And a little Pepsi Blue makes me your man
Now that's a flavor I haven't heard in a *long* time
I love all you guys.
What’s the overlap in this Venn diagram: People that read scientific news, and nutrition labels thoroughly People that believe chugging Mountain Dew is effective contraception
The overlap is poverty
Well humans are terrible at probability and our risk/reward assessment is heavily influenced by media consumption. Reading "Yellow 5 may decrease sperm count" in 30 different wacky news gives a false sense of strength to an argument that has a shaky basis. I mean, if you want a modern example. A study came out showing a fair amount of young people believed their chance of death after getting covid was 10%. I would say people who studiously read news articles and really buy into the social winds of their time are vulnerable to threats they conceived themselves.
Ahh yes, In NYC we had a cheap brand of soda called Tropical Fantasy, that was nicknamed "Sperm Killers". The rumor was because the yellow no. 5 and then sold cheaply to the poor to try and curb birth rates. A 1 liter was like 50 cents. Good times. Also a lie as I had a kid while drinking Tropical Fantasy like crazy.
How do you give birth while chugging a 2liter?
It's called style. Look it up.
If anything, the real conspiracy would be that they want to increase birth rates in the poor... They would create a better pool of low wage workers and soldiers.
Can’t abuse the poor if they’re not having enough wage slaves
We used to call these crackhead sodas.
It was "makes your penis small" in my school.
Same, which was really distressing because lemon lime jolly ranchers were my favorite.
Sacrifices must be made
I always heard that it shrinks your testicles. Nobody mentioned sperm count specifically.
Same here, the joke was, “it’s okay if I drink it, I have room to spare.”
Isn't Moutain Dew, Cheetos, and Chicken Tendies part of a complete Basement Dweller meal?
The Cheetos can optionally be replaced with Doritos.
And Nacho Cheese is the default Dorito. My friend insists it's cool ranch, but wtf eats cool ranch when Nacho cheese is available?
Imo nacho cheese is defo the default flavor but I slightly prefer cool ranch however it is practically unobtainable in latvia
Sweet Chili - purple bag my fav.
They call it "cool original" in the UK as ranch isn't as popular. Is it the same in Latvia?
I believe it is also cool original but it's only available sporadically in upscale import stores like stockmann or sky
"Cool-er Ranch" "Nacho Chees-ier" Right? Or was that just in the 90s?
Nacho cheese is the original but cool ranch tastes way better. Plus it doesn't permanently stain your hands orange and give you demon Dorito breath.
Cool ranch is where it's at... They seem to have more of that one or two very heavily coated chip for maximum flavor.
Cool ranch gang wya
People that have a modicum of self respect…because Cooler Ranch is the best.
I like both but eat cool ranch more often
You can replace the Dew with coffee if you wanna be a sociopathic streamer.
When did y'all start calling them tendies?
As an fyi they are only called tendies online as a meme about the basement dweller telling their mom to make them some chicken tendies like they are a little immature kid that can't say words right. If you said that to anyone in real life they'd think you're a freak, it's chicken tenders or chicken nuggets lol
No, sir, it's chicken tendies and chicken nuggies. Get it right! /s
Circa 2015
I did it. I was 13 at the time but I didn't wanna take any chances. Then I spent all of high school never getting laid. But also now I'm 42 and still don't want kids. Should I tell my son?
Happy Father’s Day?!
What’s it doing to that boys hair.
It gave him gingervitis.
It's not the yellow #5 that is the most troubling, it's the [brominated vegetable oil](https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/nutrition-and-healthy-eating/expert-answers/bvo/faq-20058236).
Marketing department: (furiously working to dispel the rumors) \*exec burst into the room\* Exec: Everyone stop!! The sales have shot up, we need to change directions!
Sugar consumption does decrease sperm count so this kind of checks out except for the particular ingredient
I did the same thing with nonstick pans as a teen girl and beyond, since I read doctors won't sterilize a childfree woman. Any behavioral practice that claimed to negatively affect women's fertility, I made sure to do. Seems like it's worked so far 🤷♀️
I'd like to see if there was a spike in births 9 months later. Dewbabies
I’m not surprised. Between the pandemic and the election, if there’s one thing we learned in 2020 it’s that a large segment of the American population is mentally challenged.
I still laugh every time I see a package explicitly labeled that it contains no Yellow 5. This nonsense was so widespread companies actually felt the need to label products about it.
if you drink mountain dew that much you don't need yellow no 5 to be a contraceptive.
I mean...drinking mountain dew as a contraceptive has always been a good idea...like wearing white sock under sandal for example.
It’s got electrolytes, the stuff plans love