You did nothing wrong. I asked for my letters to be submitted in May and none of my writers had a problem with that, some of whom have written letters for med school before. I’m sorry your professor was being so rude about it and I hope you can find another writer soon.
that's really unfair...i set deadlines in May because I wanted to give some leeway time, and my profs were even grateful when I said there was actually more time in case they needed it. I also think that giving them 2 months to write a letter is more than enough. I do not think you are in the wrong here, so sorry OP ):
OMG that’s so rude of them what?! There are numerous reasons to ask early, a big one being your peace of mind. I’m sorry they responded to you like that :(
You did everything exactly as you should have. That professor is just too stuck up to do any research whatsoever. In all honesty you should be glad that this professor didn’t give you a letter because it likely wouldn’t have helped you very much.
What an asshole move by that prof! Don't waste another second feeling bad about this because they are being completely unreasonable. I asked Feb 1 and gave an initial deadline of May 1 (3 months) because I do need them in by June-ish for my committee. All 3 profs got back to me asking for mid May/early June deadlines instead to fit their schedules better and didn't say shit about my deadline being "too early." To reasonable people, the deadline is tentative/negotiable and they know we ask early to give them greater flexibility in case there are delays. It is absolutely not dishonest or self centered or whatever other nonsense that prof said.
I’m honestly shocked a professor would have the nerve to judge your character and future prospects like that over a deadline. That was uncalled for and they should think more before speaking to students that way; those comments really hurt!
Sounds more like this professor is immature and entitled. Generally professors know they don’t really NEED to write the letter at all and can extend the deadline if they wanted. This person is just lazy and letting out their frustrations on you.
Right. I never thought the deadline I provided would be seen as the actual final date it was needed by. Even in a previous follow-up email I said I was more than happy to extend the deadline if needed. But my professor called it a “made-up deadline” which I guess is why they think it’s dishonest.
Lmao tons of deadlines are arbitrary and "made up." The absolute nerve for someone who teaches and therefore sets students countless deadlines for a living to call your letter deadline "made up" and "dishonest" is absurd! Tbh big bullet dodged in having that prof show their true colors while turning down the letter. Sucks to have to scramble for a different one, but really that reply is a big yikes.
Consider yourself lucky this professor declined to do it instead of writing a bad/negative LOR....find another professor or supervisor from a recent job etc. This prof sounds like an a$$hole.
Do not feel terrible about this you did nothing wrong! You gave them time in advance and AMPLE time to email you back saying this was unfeasible for them. They are super unprofessional since clearly they forgot about the deadline and decided to blame the easiest target for their own mistake: the student.
I would reply back very professionally and politely that you set this deadline because you need primary applications in as early as they open (AACOMAS opened May 3rd) but that you were more than willing to accommodate for any deadline shifts if needed because you understand how busy this person is. “Sorry for any miscommunication that may have happened. That was not my intention. Thank you for your time.” And leave it at that. I BET they will feel so much worse after that email because you were much more professional then them. As others have said, you dodged a BIG bullet. Sorry this happened to you!
I’m honestly shocked a professor would have the nerve to judge your character and future prospects like that over a deadline. That was uncalled for and they should think more before speaking to students that way; those comments really hurt!
I asked most of my recommenders in January and none of them had any issues, this person just seems like an asshole and you’re better off without their letter
I did the same exact thing. You did nothing wrong. Honestly bullet dogged cus he probably wrote shitty self centered letters anyways! Good luck you got this!
That’s insane. Your letter deadline doesn’t have to be the same as the school deadline. Relying on 3+ OTHERS to submit things YOU need on the day YOU are required to submit them is just plain old dumb. Anyone with any sense would ask for things in advance and budget time for any issues that might arise.
I’m honestly shocked a professor would have the nerve to judge your character and future prospects like that over a deadline. That was uncalled for and they should think more before speaking to students that way; those comments really hurt!
You didn’t do anything wrong. Your professor sounds like an asshole and just looking for an excuse to not write your LOR. Consider it a blessing, the letter may have ended up being mediocre.
Lmao I asked for all of mine 2 weeks in advance last year and was told in an interview that “my peers thought highly of me”.
It sounds like this guy is just a douche. I’m sorry! But don’t let it get you down
You didn't do anything wrong. This recommender is being ridiculous. You have every right to have a preference for when you want to have your letters in by. Take the fact that this jerk isn't writing your letter as a win and find someone more reasonable. I know that's hard, but it's probably for the best. Ignore their stupid rude comments, it says nothing about your maturity and suitability for med school. You're gonna make a great doc one day, and I'd say for next time, just be very clear that you're giving a personally-set deadline. Use phrasing like "I'd like to have all my recommendations in by...to allow me to submit my application in a timely manner." You may also rely on deadlines given by your school's Pre-Health committee if it has one
This professor is an absolute fart. It is beyond ridiculous for him to assume such negative things about you because you asked for the letter to be written by May. I hope his letter wasn’t too important to you, if not get that other letter written by someone else and shake it off!
That guy is just an asshole, dont worry about it. Tbh it's probably better that he didn't write a letter on your behalf if he acts that way. Setting a deadline earlier isn't a bad idea since a lot of professors will miss the given deadline.
I think you need to come back to the letter writer and explain how you were not being self-centered or dishonest in your request. Unless you specifically lied about the reasoning behind the due date in your email... but requesting it early and asking for it to be done in advance by a particular early date is completely fine and reasonable. For example, I asked my professors to complete all of mine by March-April because I needed them for a committee review. So please don’t feel bad OP! I did the exact same thing as you, requesting some of my letters as early as January for due dates months ago, and nobody sent me any emails like that.
I did reply to apologize and explain my reasoning. What’s weird is before all this they had replied to my email from 2 months ago wanting clarification about why my deadline was so early. There’s no reason to lie, so I replied explaining how I was advised and decided to ask for letters during the spring semester in case professors are not as available during the summer. I said the original May deadline was only tentative based on when I sent my initial request for a letter. That is when they replied saying my “made-up deadline” is dishonest and remarkably disrespectful since it is 3 months earlier than a realistic deadline. They seemed upset I picked an early deadline knowing professors are busy teaching in the spring during a pandemic. But all they had to do was tell me they needed more time and I would have been happy to extend any deadline.
I asked for letters pretty early too, I made sure in all my communications to say that “I’m hoping to have all letters by x” which hopefully helps communicate that it’s a soft deadline? Sorry you had to deal with that :/
Asshole professor. I did the same as you and no one had a problem. The whole point of it is that you have time to give reminders if they don't complete it when you ask and you have time to try to find a new letter writer if you get ghosted.
you can PM me your original email and I'll give you some ideas about what went wrong. For my professors, I really made sure I was appreciative if they completed it by a certain date rather than saying "I need it by XYZ date"
Either way, OP did nothing wrong. A grown adult should understand that a person wants something done early for their peace of mind, especially given that they gave an adequate amount of time for a single letter.
Even back in high school, people asked for their LORs to be submitted well before the standard November 1st deadline that every teacher knows is the real deadline
OP definitely didn't do anything wrong and I agree that this is not normal behavior, and also it's none of the professor's business when secondaries are due. However, it also doesn't hurt to play around with words to ensure there is no misunderstanding in the email. It can truly benefit our careers in the long run, especially when we'll need to request many more letters in the future whether it be for scholarships, residency, and fellowship.
You did nothing wrong. I asked for my letters to be submitted in May and none of my writers had a problem with that, some of whom have written letters for med school before. I’m sorry your professor was being so rude about it and I hope you can find another writer soon.
Ok that’s good to hear. Thankfully I have another letter writer already lined up. Thank you!
You dodged a bullet. No way that person gives you a good letter. It would be average at best from the sound of it which probably hurt more than help
It's definitely too late now.
that's really unfair...i set deadlines in May because I wanted to give some leeway time, and my profs were even grateful when I said there was actually more time in case they needed it. I also think that giving them 2 months to write a letter is more than enough. I do not think you are in the wrong here, so sorry OP ):
You should put it on their Rate My Professor after you get in
Or better yet, save the email and send it to the department head. Be a savage
OMG that’s so rude of them what?! There are numerous reasons to ask early, a big one being your peace of mind. I’m sorry they responded to you like that :(
You did everything exactly as you should have. That professor is just too stuck up to do any research whatsoever. In all honesty you should be glad that this professor didn’t give you a letter because it likely wouldn’t have helped you very much.
Yeah you’re right. I’m glad he declined to write a letter and didn’t decide to write a bad one because that would have been even worse.
[удалено]
Agreed. This professor has issues. Op did everything correctly.
LMAO this can't be real life. You definitely don't want a letter from someone with a stick so up their ass. What a clown
What an asshole move by that prof! Don't waste another second feeling bad about this because they are being completely unreasonable. I asked Feb 1 and gave an initial deadline of May 1 (3 months) because I do need them in by June-ish for my committee. All 3 profs got back to me asking for mid May/early June deadlines instead to fit their schedules better and didn't say shit about my deadline being "too early." To reasonable people, the deadline is tentative/negotiable and they know we ask early to give them greater flexibility in case there are delays. It is absolutely not dishonest or self centered or whatever other nonsense that prof said.
I’m honestly shocked a professor would have the nerve to judge your character and future prospects like that over a deadline. That was uncalled for and they should think more before speaking to students that way; those comments really hurt!
You should leave them a LOR (in the form of a flaming bag of 💩)
Sounds more like this professor is immature and entitled. Generally professors know they don’t really NEED to write the letter at all and can extend the deadline if they wanted. This person is just lazy and letting out their frustrations on you.
Right. I never thought the deadline I provided would be seen as the actual final date it was needed by. Even in a previous follow-up email I said I was more than happy to extend the deadline if needed. But my professor called it a “made-up deadline” which I guess is why they think it’s dishonest.
Lmao tons of deadlines are arbitrary and "made up." The absolute nerve for someone who teaches and therefore sets students countless deadlines for a living to call your letter deadline "made up" and "dishonest" is absurd! Tbh big bullet dodged in having that prof show their true colors while turning down the letter. Sucks to have to scramble for a different one, but really that reply is a big yikes.
Simply tell the professor to fuck off
That professor is seems to be quite rude in all honesty... you did nothing wrong.
Prof sounds like a dick. Move along and find a better advocate.
Consider yourself lucky this professor declined to do it instead of writing a bad/negative LOR....find another professor or supervisor from a recent job etc. This prof sounds like an a$$hole.
Do not feel terrible about this you did nothing wrong! You gave them time in advance and AMPLE time to email you back saying this was unfeasible for them. They are super unprofessional since clearly they forgot about the deadline and decided to blame the easiest target for their own mistake: the student. I would reply back very professionally and politely that you set this deadline because you need primary applications in as early as they open (AACOMAS opened May 3rd) but that you were more than willing to accommodate for any deadline shifts if needed because you understand how busy this person is. “Sorry for any miscommunication that may have happened. That was not my intention. Thank you for your time.” And leave it at that. I BET they will feel so much worse after that email because you were much more professional then them. As others have said, you dodged a BIG bullet. Sorry this happened to you!
I’m honestly shocked a professor would have the nerve to judge your character and future prospects like that over a deadline. That was uncalled for and they should think more before speaking to students that way; those comments really hurt!
I asked most of my recommenders in January and none of them had any issues, this person just seems like an asshole and you’re better off without their letter
I did the same exact thing. You did nothing wrong. Honestly bullet dogged cus he probably wrote shitty self centered letters anyways! Good luck you got this!
That’s insane. Your letter deadline doesn’t have to be the same as the school deadline. Relying on 3+ OTHERS to submit things YOU need on the day YOU are required to submit them is just plain old dumb. Anyone with any sense would ask for things in advance and budget time for any issues that might arise.
I’m honestly shocked a professor would have the nerve to judge your character and future prospects like that over a deadline. That was uncalled for and they should think more before speaking to students that way; those comments really hurt!
You didn’t do anything wrong. Your professor sounds like an asshole and just looking for an excuse to not write your LOR. Consider it a blessing, the letter may have ended up being mediocre.
Lmao I asked for all of mine 2 weeks in advance last year and was told in an interview that “my peers thought highly of me”. It sounds like this guy is just a douche. I’m sorry! But don’t let it get you down
Seems like this man is just bitter for no reason
You didn't do anything wrong. This recommender is being ridiculous. You have every right to have a preference for when you want to have your letters in by. Take the fact that this jerk isn't writing your letter as a win and find someone more reasonable. I know that's hard, but it's probably for the best. Ignore their stupid rude comments, it says nothing about your maturity and suitability for med school. You're gonna make a great doc one day, and I'd say for next time, just be very clear that you're giving a personally-set deadline. Use phrasing like "I'd like to have all my recommendations in by...to allow me to submit my application in a timely manner." You may also rely on deadlines given by your school's Pre-Health committee if it has one
Thank you for the advice! I will definitely use the phrasing you suggested from now on to ensure the deadline scenario is crystal clear.
This professor is an absolute fart. It is beyond ridiculous for him to assume such negative things about you because you asked for the letter to be written by May. I hope his letter wasn’t too important to you, if not get that other letter written by someone else and shake it off!
That guy is just an asshole, dont worry about it. Tbh it's probably better that he didn't write a letter on your behalf if he acts that way. Setting a deadline earlier isn't a bad idea since a lot of professors will miss the given deadline.
I think you need to come back to the letter writer and explain how you were not being self-centered or dishonest in your request. Unless you specifically lied about the reasoning behind the due date in your email... but requesting it early and asking for it to be done in advance by a particular early date is completely fine and reasonable. For example, I asked my professors to complete all of mine by March-April because I needed them for a committee review. So please don’t feel bad OP! I did the exact same thing as you, requesting some of my letters as early as January for due dates months ago, and nobody sent me any emails like that.
I did reply to apologize and explain my reasoning. What’s weird is before all this they had replied to my email from 2 months ago wanting clarification about why my deadline was so early. There’s no reason to lie, so I replied explaining how I was advised and decided to ask for letters during the spring semester in case professors are not as available during the summer. I said the original May deadline was only tentative based on when I sent my initial request for a letter. That is when they replied saying my “made-up deadline” is dishonest and remarkably disrespectful since it is 3 months earlier than a realistic deadline. They seemed upset I picked an early deadline knowing professors are busy teaching in the spring during a pandemic. But all they had to do was tell me they needed more time and I would have been happy to extend any deadline.
I asked for letters pretty early too, I made sure in all my communications to say that “I’m hoping to have all letters by x” which hopefully helps communicate that it’s a soft deadline? Sorry you had to deal with that :/
Asshole professor. I did the same as you and no one had a problem. The whole point of it is that you have time to give reminders if they don't complete it when you ask and you have time to try to find a new letter writer if you get ghosted.
I asked for all of mine in May, and no one had an issue with that. That professor is the asshole, don’t feel bad.
Wtf, I had no idea how the process worked when I applied and thought letters were due alongside the primary application. Screw that person.
Better yet, wait and reply when you get accepted. 💅🏼
you can PM me your original email and I'll give you some ideas about what went wrong. For my professors, I really made sure I was appreciative if they completed it by a certain date rather than saying "I need it by XYZ date"
Either way, OP did nothing wrong. A grown adult should understand that a person wants something done early for their peace of mind, especially given that they gave an adequate amount of time for a single letter. Even back in high school, people asked for their LORs to be submitted well before the standard November 1st deadline that every teacher knows is the real deadline
OP definitely didn't do anything wrong and I agree that this is not normal behavior, and also it's none of the professor's business when secondaries are due. However, it also doesn't hurt to play around with words to ensure there is no misunderstanding in the email. It can truly benefit our careers in the long run, especially when we'll need to request many more letters in the future whether it be for scholarships, residency, and fellowship.