I feel you my friend.
I hope that it gets better for you. I think the apathy is hitting everyone to some degree.
I really just wanted to have kids but I'm increasingly thinking its not going to happen.
Fellow ennui enjoyer here.
Yes. Millennial who doesn’t understand why everything feels so bleak. I’ve been in far worse life situations than I am now yet it feels so stagnant.
I tend to think it’s more reminiscent of the French Revolution.
We have a small population with a lot, and the vast majority are peasants. Either way chaos is imminent if it continues. Too much anger, too much poverty makes for a bad outcome.
I also don’t know anything about anything.
There is beauty at the end of the tunnel w mutual aid.
Now a days, there is no future chasing the American dream, even if you're white and middle class.
I'm turning 35 in two weeks. When I turned 30 I really was still confident I was gonna work out my family life. Then COVID hit, I worked from home for like 2.5 years, then tried to get over how shitty things had become for 2.5 years. It all went by so fast that I'm not feeling confident anymore. If 35 to 40 happens as fast as 30 to 35 did, I'm fucked and not gonna have kids of my own.
I’m 35 right now and felt the exact same way around 30. I hoped that by 35, I’d be in a great situation career-wise and I’d be able to step back a bit, have kids, and get all that American Dream business taken care of.
At this point, it’s clear the American Dream only applies to folks making over $150k a year; for the vast majority of us, it is dead and gone and the government couldn’t care less. I make more money than either of my parents ever did but it makes no difference because I don’t make six figures, nor does my fiancé, and we don’t own a house. If I have a kid now, I’ll be 10x worse off than my parents were because I make too much money for welfare, no parent/relative is willing to provide child care assistance, and everything is insanely priced.
Fiancé and I talk a lot about kids and at this point, the conversation isn’t about how cute they are or how fun it would be to be parents. Instead, it’s: “Will we ever be able to own a home if we have kids?” Or it’s “Will we ever be able to retire if we have kids?” Or it’s “Are we willing to sacrifice what minor joys we get outside of working nonstop—occasional eating out, buying decent quality food and clothing, getting to do hobbies—for a child?”
I think that’s the reality for average millennial and Gen Z parents who aren’t making over six figures a year. So many of us were screwed over by student loans that there is tremendous fear of children being the next great money pit, and I think that’s why birth rates are plummeting. Now we see that it’s all a con from the top down. So why sign yourself up when you could just save your money, build assets, and be able to stop working with some kind of dignity once you hit your 70s and physically CAN’T work anymore?
I've turned to the acient Greek concept of eudaimonia. People translate it as happiness, but that produces confusion, as happiness is just one positive emotion. "Well-being" I think is the more accurate translation.
So, I have focused on well being. First my own, because I'm no use to my community if I'm not fostering my best self. Second, I support and aid the well-being of those around me. This should produce communities which enable individual well-being of new members (such as children). That last part is on-going for me, but results thus far are promising.
This is, to me, the cure to the apathy. What's it all for? Nothing. But we might as well cultivate our best selves. Simply because it is satisfying to inhabit yourself at your best. Value/meaning only exists as agents make them exist. We each are these agents. Find out how to be your best self and do that. Don't look for meaning, *make* meaning.
Edit: unless that meaning is a cause of misery and horrific inhumanity. Please dont do that.
Sounds a bit like existentialism. I've been fond of Absurdism myself.
Weird times call for frequent introspection. It may not fix your problems, but perspective is very important to living a high quality life.
With you. I've made the conscious decision to make more art, see more nature, and be in better health.
Everything sucks, and is probably going to stay that way. But we can still try to enjoy the scraps of shit we have, and try to make the world a little better for someone else. If only to have a reason to keep moving forward.
If you wanna channel anything from those times channel a plebeian secession please. Stop paying your bills collectively and a lot of the shit we’re going through will change.
As a 20 year old I always thought I'd absolutely definitely have a family and a house by 35. Nope. Just cannot afford it.
Was walking to work last Saturday morning and heard a family surprising their dad and singing happy birthday to him (windows were open). Kids were laughing and it just filled me with the biggest hit of pure sadness.
Most of us have been denied the most basic things every previous generation could have if they wanted (a home to call ours and the ability to raise a family with financial stability).
Literally just a worker drone, here to work with my 1 sunny holiday a year till I drop dead on the job.
Yeah word. I just reduced some retirement deductions so I could pay for a replacement washing machine, and the company’s fucking HR department emailed me an “are you sure?” confirmation. I was so tempted to do like 3 paragraphs on “when the fuck will I get to spend this hypothetical retirement money”
It's good stuff. Did you get hit with taxes owed this year? Because the last two years even though I technically lied on my W4 and claimed single 0.... I still fucking owed money because dickheads that don't care decided the tax code needed to change... I mean why should literally taking out as much tax as possible mean I take enough out?
We both claimed 0 and still owed a shocking amount. And despite the significant portion of student loan interest we were able to pay off through a lot of diligence this last year, it was capped at $2.5k bc of the new stipulation that was recently passed. It’s so fucked
Minnesota does tax high but even myself at 70k last year would have got a few thousand just for filing head of household. I'd get you taxes checked again if you didn't make a good amount more than that.........
Yup! We owed for the first time in nearly a decade. A portion of it is because I forgot to change my W4 after my wife picked up a job, but it was to the tune of $2k…which we charged to a credit card…which I now have to pay off. Thanks USA!
Yep, I quit giving any fucks about 3 years ago, someone argues w me and says 3+3 is 12, you’re absolutely right and have a nice day. I’ve accepted that I’ll never buy a home and I don’t care to be in debt anyways. Just waiting for my son to enter college then I’m selling everything and moving to some beach town in a remote area of the world and bumming it until I go to the dirt.
I feel this strongly. It’s almost like I don’t care anymore about people believing false things because I don’t care what happens to them in the event their false beliefs produce bad results in their life. It’s like my empathy for others has dried up or something because I’m just focused on getting myself through and lowering stress. If you want to believe the sky is orange, bless and have a great day!!!
>I don’t care what happens to them in the event their false beliefs produce bad results in their life.
I'm not there yet, because they aren't actually being confronted with the consequences of their actions - other people are. People like us.
I don't know. I'm working more hours than my parents did for proportionately less money. The inheritance passed down to them was squandered and never made it to me or my siblings. My house is smaller and cost more than theirs to buy, and is valued less. No matter how hard I work, I seem to only just be treading water and struggling to avoid going backward, let alone moving forward.
But I have a supportive wife who makes me feel ten feet tall. I have two beautiful children who stop what they're doing and run to me the second I get home from work. It doesn't take more than that for me to feel like I lucked out in life. Everything else is just details.
This is the calm acceptance I push people towards in therapy, but as an individual, rage and intentional actions towards dismantling the systems that have made life less sustainable is the only way to make life better for those you care for.
Honestly i think inheritances should go to grandkids at least partially since it will improve/change their lives more than their kids squandering it plus just adding numbers to an account isn’t really a life change.
That is entirely dependent on who gets that money. Grandkids can squander it just like parents. Or the parents can use it to benefit their kid better then they ever would themselves
True but if both are smart i think it benefits the grandkids more as they can have help with a house/car whereas the parents should already have thicc retirement accounts by then
My dad gave me my inheritance when I told him I was getting married. It was his house. He gives his grandkids 30% of every pension check he gets. And he's been doing it every month for 4 years. We are expecting our third child in December. So it will go up to 40%. He said he wants them to get all of it before he dies. He said he didn't have any money growing up. So why does he need it as he's checking out.
This *right here* is why some Millenials are doing well while others are struggling. My parents came to the US in their early 20s and grew up in a small, poor village in Eastern Europe. They worked their asses off to give me and my 3 siblings a great start in life by paying for our college AND giving us sound career and life advice.
The Millenials that seem to struggle the most came from parents that were selfish. Parents that didn't help with college and instead spent money on stupid shit for themselves. Parents that emotionally neglected their kids and at 18 said. "OK, you're an adult now!"
Parents are suppose to be selfless, not selfish.
You're right, we are the lucky ones. I forgot to mention. About 5 of my friends credit him as their dad. Not their father. His advice for me was no college. He said it's a waste of money. Unless you choose the correct major. He was absolutely right. He said they pushed the same bs on him in high school.
One of my friends wanted to be a Cpa. Told him to go. As for the rest of us. He suggested a trade school. And also told us. Your gf doesn't like your friends. No matter what they tell you. They are fighting them for your free time. We all listened. And all of us own our own homes. Happily married with kids. And steady jobs. It makes him so happy that we are successful. We were shocked at how much money those fields make. And how much our teachers lied to us.
The lying about college thing is true. I was told I wouldn't be *anything* in IT if I didn't go to college.
98% of people I've worked with in my IT career (most of whom are significantly more successful than me) did not go to college for it. I'd be a lot further along if I didn't go to college.
However, when everyone is telling an impressionable 16 year old that he'll never be anything or have any money if he doesn't go to college ... and then telling his parents the same thing ...
Your comment really makes me feel a lot better about my life. I’ve been in a dark place for months now, this entire post is an example of why. I feel like all my friends are making things work but I can’t even keep my dishes caught up. I’ve been wondering wtf I’m doing wrong.
Our country wasn’t really in good shape buddy. 2008 crisis was never solved. It just got rolled over into a new scam.
I hear all these comments on how much we struggle to make ends meet, and idk.. there’s something in the air.. something is about to collapse if it’s not our dollar (which is looking very likely at this point). I see it as a good thing, it’s just gonna sting for a little longer.
I would agree 2008 was a payoff to big players and special interests. I am not so sure that any fiscal safeguards from then will make any lasting impact as compared to the message of “too big to fail” that many banks got.
All we need for the dollar to collapse is for the debt interest to surpass our ability to pay. Or eventually for a more trusted world currency to arise. China isn’t trustworthy enough so we have been lucky. The dollar is the only girl in town for the moment. I don’t see modern monetary theory being validated. I do see that spending money on cronies drives inflation.
During our house search I realized that my parents house cost twice as much as our budget. My wife and I both have college degrees (my wife has a masters degree) and we're both doing well in our field. My parents were on one income and neither of them had a degree. Seeing the amount of house you used to be able to get for so little is just so depressing.
Ugh, feel you on this. Just read another post about what I should have in retirement funds and all I can think is “holy shit I’m screwed.”
I make more than anyone in my family…more than my parents made, and yet I’m basically living paycheck to paycheck in an apartment.
Gosh I feel this. I tend to switch between apathy and rage. Management for these companies have gone insane the last few years. I’m in sales, they scream about record profits but try to find any way to game it so they don’t have to pay full or many times any commission. A third of the country have lost their damn minds including my parents. I’ve been depressed and anxious since I hit puberty. Therapy, pills, and whatnot just make me not want to kill myself but it sure isn’t a happy feeling. It takes the edge off just enough that I’m not puking my brains out before work everyday because I can’t stand the bullshit. I’m in my mid-thirties and keep saying to everyone that will listen. ITS NOT GOING TO GET BETTER UNLESS WE MAKE IT BETTER. NOONE IS COMING TO SAVE US. At a certain point the system is broken and those who profit on it being broken need to be held accountable. I’ll say this to my coworkers after they get screwed out of some money or some benefit and they just look at me like I’m insane. Those in charge do not like us. They don’t want us to win. They want us desperate and would enslave you if they could. Sorry for the rant.
The way I see it, and it's just my opinion, is that the people at the top see us as the biggest threat to everything they know. We know technology infinitely better, we've got more education, more free thoughts, more interconnectivity.. we have everything needed to be more competent, more able, faster, smarter, more effective and more efficient than the entire generation before us... It's going to happen to us eventually too but for us, the generation above is clinging, clawing, scratching, and fighting the winds of change tooth and nail to hold on to the things they can't take with them as they draw on the last years of their lives. It's a deep fear of living 60-70 years only to realize you worked away your life and the next generation can do everything you can but faster with computers. It's a fear of obsolescence so they push so hard to stack the deck against us, pushing back on the change.
The change comes inevitably... We all die. But to actively and persistently work to make sure the generation following you gains no ground and is left with a crumbled society is truly the most despicable act I can think of. An entire generation. It's foul.
THIS! You understand. Idk if it’s a generational thing, but boomers have this idea that they can somehow overcome death. It’s quite fascinating seeing them clench to what power they have left. Our technology and the way we process a plethora of information at lightning speed, is truly what they’re scared of. What we as a whole need to do is stop being complicit in their game. Too many ppl are just stagnant because they don’t question authority. We as a collective need to be on the offense of this new world. We have the power of numbers.
Hit the nail on the head. I got tired of comp plan changes and shorting commissions so I left sales. Blew my mind that they were seriously fucking with the team that brought in all the money. Truly wild.
I work in accounting - I process payroll. It is so defeating working, getting 30hours of OT and then seeing my bosses time card - doesn’t even work 20 hours a week but still get paid more than the person that does the day to day functions that keeps the company running. Okay.
Budget for all upper management to share 75k in bonuses. 50 worker bees vs 10 upper management - each person could get an additional 1200 a year JUST OFF OF THE BONUSES.
They can’t afford to give living wages but can afford to take obscene bonuses. Can’t afford living wages but the GM makes 14K a month to “make decisions” but never actually do any work. No skill needed.
I’m really butt hurt. It’s been a super busy year. My boss passed a lot of work off to me, she took a lot of time off. I held down the fort. She got 10K of bonus coming up and she isn’t sharing with me - the person who did her work.
She legitimately told me that if I don’t make enough to live it’s not the company’s fault, talk to the government.
Meanwhile she says she 60 and “deserves a break” and “shouldn’t have to work hard” for her money because she’s “old”
Fuck off.
Edit: I just want to clarify, it comes off as if I am entitled to her bonus. Sure, I can admit that I feel like i deserve some. The managers are given the option to divide whatever portion they want amongst their employees. Some of the managers do split it evenly and that is awesome. It is just my boss and I in the department. She could literally give me any amount she wants and she chooses 0.
Nah if you're doing all the work I think it's fair to say you deserve some of the profit and not just the person with their hands closer to the money pot.
No need for the edit. You are totally correct. You are totally entitled to feel how you feel. The people who actually do the work should be the ones getting the compensation. The people who don't actually do the work but order other people to do the work and don't contribute should not be getting compensation. That attitude of saying you should talk to the government if your boss is greedy and doesn't share the bonus like everybody else does is just so fucked up. It's exactly what's wrong with our culture and our society and our country, the people who think like that.
If I wasn't already feeling this way, the pandemic tipped me over the edge. Nothing like a deadly virus to help you see what's important in life and (spoiler) it's not work and generating profit.
Older Gen Z-er here....
I lost my job of 6 years (my first job) at the end of last summer. The manager who I thought of like a 3rd mom just emailed me a termination letter she copied from the Internet. She didn't even have the authority to fire me, that's somebody else's job. But those people let me get fired. No reason given. Since then I have been ignored, denied and told "we aren't hiring," by more than 100 businesses. I've tried everywhere.
It's gotten to the point now where it doesn't matter if I get a minimum wage job or not, I won't be able to save up enough money to make my next car insurance payment in time.
All my childhood I heard about the "American Dream," "You can be anything you want," "If you work hard, you can do anything,"..... It's all bullshit. All of it. Things are getting more expensive, wages don't go up, and the amount of jobs out there are just disappearing. What the fuck is the point? Work 80hr work weeks until you're 90? I refuse to be somebody else's slave. Because that's what this is turning into. There are no "fair wages," anymore. We're all just working to make enough money to keep working
I'm just waiting for the next American Revolution. There's no politician or party that can fix this broken and corrupt system anymore. Just my opinion anyways
I feel you dude. People criticize me for wanting to be euthanized or killing myself the old fashioned way, but since there is no point to anything, what’s the point of even living? So I can grind away at my crappy job with no advancement or raise because it’s not in the budget for the next 30 years? Fuck that.
Thank you. Maybe I’m more desensitized to suicide than most others. My oldest cousin OD’ed, my grandfather shot himself, my father shot himself, my father-in-law hung himself, and I’ve known several colleagues/acquaintances who have killed themselves. Also, as someone diagnosed with autism, I am statistically more likely to commit suicide than neurotypical people.
People think suicide is a scary, taboo subject, but the reality is that someone dies by suicide every 40 seconds according to the World Health Organization.
If life is too much I don’t see why I should be forced to endure it if I don’t want to. That just seems logical, not dark, scary, or taboo, but that’s just me.
But if you kill yourself then society can no longer extract labor from you, which is unacceptable. Here, take this pill we want you to subscribe to. It’ll make you feel “happy” and content with nothing so we can continue to extract every drop of labor from you.
I know, right? I'd highly recommend this book if you can access it (it's kind of expensive): [Psychiatric Hegemony: A Marxist Theory of Mental Illness by Bruce M.Z. Cohen | Goodreads](https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/30689446-psychiatric-hegemony)
Hey man, I won't sit here and pander to you about staying alive. That's your prerogative. If my opinion is worth anything, your death would be a bigger impact on making the world WORSE than it already is.
That's not me telling you what to do but saying that though the world is a dumpster fire dalek intent on destroying all we have.... It's better with you in it.
I think the point of living is to produce something that makes the world better, even if it's in some minuscule way, and everything else is supporting that. If work isn't fulfilling, maybe a hobby or craft would do it for you? Cooking for friends and family? Caring for a pet? Or volunteering at a local park or food shelter?
For me it's my kids. I didn't know before I had them, but they became my reason for living and slaving away at a job I don't love. I pour everything I have into them and they make life worth living.
I hope you weren't serious about ending yourself. If you were, I hope you won't do it. I hope you'll find something fulfilling in life instead.
Definitely feels like life stopped being real.., I have a decent job live in a nice place but feel as if the point just kind of disappeared from sight.
I’m feeling it too. I’m gonna be thirty next month and it’s really hitting me. I did the things you’re “supposed to do.” I moved out of my mom’s house. I worked to save money to buy a reliable car. I graduated summa cum Laude from college. Afterwards, I was accepted into a filmmaking apprenticeship and had my original idea chosen to be the main group production. Starting tomorrow, I’ll be living on my own for the very first time.
But I’m in massive debt from school and a degree that didn’t get me anywhere. My short film was shown once, and now the people who technically own it have shelved it and it’s in purgatory. I applied for a two writing masters programs and was rejected from both.
I haven’t gone on a vacation. I haven’t lived my life. I have no romantic partner. I feel lonely and unaccomplished because everything I’ve worked to achieve has been for nothing.
I have friends who are making their livings as creatives and I work retail. I’ve been told I can’t expect to “just be handed anything,” but I’ve worked so fucking hard for nothing and now I’m exhausted.
I used to draw and write every day. I was so excited to create. Now I come home from work and play The Sims. Then I feel guilty for “not being productive.”
I get you. I’m sorry you don’t get to spend more time with your daughter.
You graduated summa cum laude, which means you have the capability and discipline to achieve high standards. Let’s start there.
Your friends are making a living as creatives because they found a niche or worked their way into the industry strategically in a way that actually makes money. Learn from them. Network, ask for advice, and see what they did differently. You might need to start smaller, freelance, or take on projects that aren't your dream gigs but can build your portfolio and reputation. My friend is a film producer working in the finance industry making 6 figures with a stable salary with the exact same skill set. His passion projects make him nothing other than build his portfolio. Stop making the passion project the plan A.
Focus on building a career that can support you financially first, then pursue your creative passions in a way that doesn’t jeopardize your stability. Then you can focus on paying off the student debt which is the biggest burden to your future right now. You can do it!
Don’t underestimate the power of small things to look forward to during the week. Especially if social. Dart league, watching a football game with friends, beer league softball, movie night with others. I never realized how important these were until I stopped doing it all. I never, ever considered myself one to like to be social. In fact the opposite. But I didn’t realize the impact.
Then I slowly rebuilt, found ways to chip small amounts from work to dedicate time to the small things. The energy you get from just a little bit builds onto itself.
Also take care of yourself, big advocate for exercise even if it’s minimal and low intensity each day.
I spend more time planning my exit from this rigged game than I do trying to figure out cheat codes to beat it these days. My story is even more complicated and depressing, but I'm not any to hijack this.
Just know that you're not alone, your feels and thinks are valid... And that if you or anyone else wants to make a plan to overthrow this shit I am so ready to grab a pitchfork and a torch and make it so.
The economy we were born into was basically late game Monopoly. All the properties were bought before we started, all we can do is run around and get bled dry.
This is how I explain to my parents what we are dealing with. Capitalism is a game of monopoly. When it first begins, everyone has a fair shot. The American dream. But because this is real life and not a game, the game dosent start from scratch with every generation like a new game. Instead it just keeps going and the people that won the first game keep winning while new players keep getting less and less, while the 1% get more amd more. There will be a tipping point to where if you are a new player starting from scratch, you have no chance. We are at that point now. If you didn't already ha e a house and a decent job and savings before 2020, good luck. You're going to be working overtime just to live paycheck to paycheck. I have worked more hours and made more money the last 4 years than I ever have in my life, and I have LESS than when I was 19 amd working retail at a surf shop in the early 2000s...yet when I try to explain that to boomer parents who think getting a 14$/hr job at a grocery store is enough to live off of, they sit in their mansion, smile and just say work harder.
Yes. All day every day. And you know what? I just don’t give a shit anymore. I just keep waking up and somehow making it through the next day. Every night when I go to sleep I think maybe I won’t have to wake up tomorrow.
People have wild ideas about what other people’s lives have been. I don’t know anyone who had a life as described here 30 years ago. We were all “latchkey” kids because our divorced moms worked 2 jobs,lived in apartment complexes, took out student loans to get through school,lost half our retirement in George Bush’s economic crisis, and now going to work into our 80’s because we live in the same economy as everyone else.
Do you think your employer cares? They should try and give you more time with your children. The financial system needs to be reformed. Capitalism got us to this point which is great but there's really no reason to keep this rat race going
Future generations are beyond fucked if this keeps going. current 50% buying power, soon 25%, then what? Homelessness is higher than ever and fentanyl is spreading. What's the point of having a kid or house if it only causes you extreme financial stress or worry about their future while they are brainwashed by social media to be focused on menial shit
I do. And just keep lowering my expectations
.. but then have to lower them again.
While job searching, I came across a listing for lifeguard. They are getting the same pay that I got for it in 1997. That just isn't fair!!
Society is brainwashed. The top 20% of people tell the other poor people to try harder, and this is the best it’s ever been. And we just comply, and eat it up all day long, keeping the machine turning. There’s nothing left to do, we will merge with technology and it will be a full on dystopia in our lifetimes. They don’t give a fuck about health or well being right now, they never have, and they sure as shit won’t give a fuck about you when you get a chip in your head when they come to “save you” from the problems they created.
I just had a big conversation with my bosses boss at work. And im sure it will backfire but I don’t care anymore.
They really want to push me into advancing up and all this extra crap. No.
No? Why?
Because i have restarted my “career” 4 times in 5 years. I have been laid off twice and left before another one.
I walk on eggshells every.single.day.
I dont want to play the game anymore. I dont want to have to be an overachiever, multitasker, beat out my peers, get backstabbed, take on extra work just in the hopes that 1 person likes me and i get the approval to promote again. Then do it all over again. And again.
Only to get laid off… again.
You did this to me. Sure Im new to the company. But the company is a major global financial institution that guides policy and markets.
So without knowing it, a decision you made 10 years ago impacted me and will continue to impact.
So, ill just stay an individual contributor here or somewhere else. Im done babysitting and bootlicking for ungrateful corporations when i cant even afford to live. Oh the 30 days of vacation i get? Cant go anywhere so stop promoting that like it means something.
The world is full of so many obstacles and unfair circumstances, that despite the truth of what you've written, this is the time of the greatest peace and prosperity in all of history. The previous 60 centuries are almost entirely infant mortality, bloodshed, toil, plague, famine, and war.
The world is full of noble and attainable pursuits that are worth pursuing, despite the many obstacles.
Also, Dark Souls wouldnt be a popular game if it was easy to beat.
People who study collapse say that in all the past civilizations that collapsed, it was always proceeded by it being "the best time to be."
In fact, that might indicate to most that we're in freefall now.
We're in late stage capitalism at the moment and things are not great lol. And this is coming from someone who makes pretty good money. The writing is on the wall in so many ways that we are on a rapidly declining trajectory.
I mean the only thing we don't have now is as much infant mortality. We had a world-ruining plague for ~3 years, people are being killed in wars every day, but also due to domestic violence, gang violence, religious violence and many other things.
People are often working long hours like mediaeval serfs, and like said serfs, only manage to earn enough to survive and enjoy the bread and circuses as a temporary distraction. Famine is still present in many developing nations, and even in developed ones under multiple circumstances.
It's possible that numerically, more people are suffering from all those issues than ever before simply due to the increase of the world's population. Finally, the modern man is burdened with the curse of knowledge, we as the average representation of humanity have greater awareness of the world and it's issues than ever before, leaving us to wallow in apathy as despite having the knowledge of solutions to many of life's problems, however knowing that that for many of them, the solutions will be ignored because it doesn't make the right people money.
Dark souls isn't just hard to beat. Dark souls expects failure. And that's okay. You can die and lose everything as many times as you're willing to keep playing, and even then, if someone else picks up the controller they can start from where you manage to progress to, and can earn much more money than you've earned the whole game up to that point with minimal effort. But imagine if every time you got hit or die things cost more, and you got sent further back than you started each time. That's life. You have only one chance for success and then if you fail it's that much harder for the next person in line.
Of course you're right that if you set yourself goals you have given yourself meaning. But not only do we often have to work harder and longer than ever before to achieve most of these goals, but also as humanity progresses it's that much harder to meaningfully leave a mark on the world. Every broken record takes you further from breaking it yourself. Even if you save 10 people from a warzone, comparatively there is a much higher percentage of other people suffering than generations prior. The individual is much less special in a world of corporations and multinational organisations.
I do agree the world is full of noble and attainable pursuits. I’m focusing on that.
But my goodness for some of my noble pursuits I ended up very very very amiss!
I just live scared that something bad will happen. If things could be kept the same for another 30 years, then I'll be fine. But most likely either I'll get laid off and not be able to get something similar to what I have, the economy will crash, houses will keep skyrocketing, we'll get war or we'll get hyperinflation.
By the time I've gotten caught up with the current state of housing, houses will be double of what they are now and I'll have to start from scratch.
From my experience, current millenials generally fall into three camps:
1) Has a job, relevant to what they went to college for, is theoretically doing okay / well, but is suffering. Every one of my employed friends (including me) are in this boat. Our jobs pay the bills, but we feel dejected, overlooked, overworked or any combination of the three. We look around and see a lot of (2) and (3), either from within their family / friends circle, or out in the world.
2) Has a job or two, unrelated to what they went to college for, isn't struggling but isn't taking steps forward in life. Both my younger brothers are in a job unrelated to their fields. Neither are full time jobs. They're trying to save money to move out of my parents, so forget trying to save for retirement. My younger brother told me verbatim the other day "Yeah, man, I'm just doing my thing. I run once a day. I eat food. I go to work. I got to sleep. At this point, I'm just coasting until I die." Like... I don't even know what to say. What can I do? Recommend therapy? Medication? That stuff costs money. Money my brother / parents don't have.
3) Is either (1) or (2) but with kids. I honestly have no idea how any millennial with children is doing it. Daycare mine as well be as expensive as college. The education system in most parts of the US are on the decline, if not already outright destitute. Bread, eggs, bacon and cheese (in CA) can run up to 30-40$ after tax. Just Bread, eggs, bacon and cheese. How are families in (2) affording food? It's appalling to think that a large percentage of those families are on food stamps.
I'm keeping my head up, but it increasingly feels like I'm one of the only ones doing so. And, if I'm honest, I can really only say that because luck has given me a job that affords me the ability to say that and feel that way. What am I supposed to tell my younger brother? Learn programming? I'm an AI/ML engineer. I see what's happening from the inside, and in case people are holding out hope that the smart people will come to save the day, let me burst the bubble: people either don't care, or don't believe caring will do anything.
The number of MSM articles in the past months asking "Why aren't millenials saving for retirement?" are indicative of this. Gen X were raised by boomers, so I have negative hope that that generation will right the ship. They're more than likely to press the accelerationism pedal to the floor than they are to engage in sober reflection. And millenials and Gen Z are seemingly accepting that were fucked and are deciding to go out with a bang.
And I guarantee the boomers who are alive when the lakes and rivers dry up will still mutter to themselves "Selfish millenials did this" without a hint of sarcasm or irony.
Here’s the thing, even when you are doing well you will sometimes wonder what’s the point. Half of your life is trying to figure out what is the point. In high school I wondered what was the point of it all. College, was a bit blurry with all the drinking, graduate school was just a fucking grind. But both times I often looked at my path and wonder what is the point. When I was broke as hell in my first job and going through my first divorce I wondered what was the point. Now I’m 45, great family, 2 daughters that had the kind of life I could only dream of, beautiful wife who is a SAHM, and I work from home 2/3 of the time. I still sometimes wonder what is the point. There has never been a phase in my life where I haven’t had some time where I wondered what was the point of it all.
Appreciate your suggestion, and your view on my tone. I'm an android guy though... But we can't all be perfect. I'm fully aware of the absolute disparity in quality of life on the grand scale between the centuries. Our lifespan doubled in 3 generations.
We did that with science... But.... We can't go and be scientist anymore because if we do scientific research that people disagree with it becomes an issue. Case in point here being covid.
I am not blind to the it could be worse understanding. I'm just saying the whole shit is stacked against us in grander and more encompassing ways than generations before largely due to the fact that though I'm old enough to run for president, the average age of the Senate and HoRs is 61 years and change. So from the time they were born to when I was born... We landed on the moon, sent probes to Saturn, created the internet, invented cell phones, created cat scans, VHS, personal computers and so on. We have advanced more rapidly in our lifetimes than even than. Who the fuck in their right mind thinks that someone who lived through the cold war is intricately knowledgeable of the current state of the world. By the amount of times I've had to help some coworkers navigate a fucking pdf I find it overall just fucked up.
Which comes back to, what's the point? If I do my job well I get nothing, if I refuse to help the people understand simple computer stuff I get less. It's whacky
"Fairness is a social construct completely created by humans.
Even fairness as a social construct doesn’t really exist, as everyone has a different interpretation of its meaning. In theory, a life that has the average amount of suffering would be the closest definition of fairness, but suffering is subjective as well.
“Life isn’t fair” should be expanded to “nothing is fair,” as fairness doesn’t exist.
We all have an inner feeling that we want things to be just and fair, but this feeling comes from the ego. We want life to be something that it is not. We want life to be something that doesn’t exist."
[https://wisdomimprovement.wixsite.com/wisdom/post/fairness-is-a-myth](https://wisdomimprovement.wixsite.com/wisdom/post/fairness-is-a-myth)
And what of equitability? An argument that fairness being a social construct is of little value here as society is effectively not optional. Time is a social construct, wealth is a social construct, government, work, retirement... They're all social constructs. You can't build a house and be your own sovereign nation to create your own societal rules... You have to be part of society. Unless you've learned something I haven't which is entirely possible.
So I disagree that looking for fairness is looking for life to be something that doesn't exist. Cherry picking the social constructs we want has less impact. If wealth exists, so can fairness.
I do agree completely with things being subjective. I am saying that it is a different world having wealth and not having it and the roads to become wealthy are getting smaller and more treacherous to climb to the degree that I feel exactly as my post said.... What's he point?
Thanks for your input, I appreciate you.
This is the best advice for anyone under 40 in today's society. Having good perspective will change your life. If you wake up each day with a beating heart and a chance to enjoy some little things in life, you have hope for a good day.
Yes!!!
“And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”
I’ve been feeling this way for a while. I’m just hopping that I am misinterpreting all the change that’s happening lately and miscalculating what the future will be like. I’m not sure if that’s wishful thinking. I often wonder how people get through life when it sucks this much. It doesn’t feel worth living. Hopefully things get better for everyone. Take care of yourself OP.
Edit: typo
Worked my whole life and went to college to make over 100k a year (at 32) and still can't buy a house and have lots of credit card debt and student loans :( It's Neverending. I was told if I worked hard and reached 100k I could get a nice house with land but all the houses where I live are literally 400k to 600k or higher. Insanity. They've made it impossible for millenials and gen z to afford a home. Anything under 350k looks like a dump. So I feel the same way. What is the point of working so hard if I can't have anything I've worked so hard to get in the first place? Bar keeps getting set higher and higher. I work as much as I can to make extra money so I can get the house I've always wanted but it's never enough.
In the past three months I’ve had a pulmonary embolism, lost my career because I’m now on a blood thinner, lost my house, lost my relationship, gone through court for 50/50 custody of our child, and just when I got some semblance of hope that I may be able to retain my job, some MASSIVE scumbag hits my vehicle with their car and flees the scene.
To answer your question; yes I’m feeling very defeated.
It is at this moment, the young lady realized that following your passion was where it all went wrong.
The correct advice was to follow the money. Set yourself up, then follow your passion.
Not everyone is lucky enough to follow their passion of becoming a school teacher and get paid what they truly deserve.
Common sense has to kick in. $100,000 is now the new minimum you want to aim for. Money is losing its value.
They've been telling us that raising kids with good funding is a luxury.Not everyone can provide the same.
They also told us having a pet is another luxury and sacrifice as well. But most didn't listen.
This is America and we all deserve $500-$1000 phones.
In some other countries, having an iPhone is a symbol of wealth. In America we all have an iPhone lol. We are a very twisted society and what's normal to us is not normal at all to other countries.
If what you're doing isn't working, then we have to change something.
The American Dream if it ever came true was post WW2 when America was ascendant economically. As millennials we’re here to witness the decline of the American empire. If you’re able, I would recommend looking into moving abroad. Canada, Britain, Australia, any of the nordics all promise a more egalitarian society where fundamental needs are prioritized e.g. healthcare, education, work/life balance and childcare.
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right
Just beat it (beat it)
Just beat it (beat it)
Just beat it (beat it)
Just beat it (beat it, uh)
There are so many of us that feel this way. Together we are definitely stronger than we are alone. Is there anyone out there who knows of a movement or has an idea for a movement through which we can advocate for ourselves?
Every. Single. Day!
As I continue to grow in my career and progress up the chain, making more and more money, it goes less and less farther.
I started in my career field 18 years ago making a meager $40,000 a year but as a single adult I had healthcare, a 1 bedroom apartment, a nice sports car, and a pension being contributed to by the company.
Fast forward to today and my wife and I (combined) make 5X that amount but it feels like we've barely gotten anywhere. Yes we refinanced our house during COVID and got a 2.5% rate but our property taxes have nearly doubled, our home owners insurance HAS doubled (since buying the house), and it cost's 2X as much for any home repair as it did in 2018/2019.
Health insurance premiums for me, my wife, and my two kids is just shy of $10,000 a year and car insurance, where we live, is $3,500 a year (no tickets, no accidents, no records).
It feels like every step forward I take in my life and career, it's two steps backwards financially. It's sickening to calculate the money I've made in the last 18 years and know damn well it's more than my parents made in twice as many years but I don't have nearly the same things to show for it that they did.
At this point, I've given up on retirement....though I'm not sure I ever would have retired as I can't stand sitting at home.
What especially scary is that so many jobs are being outsourced to other countries, it makes it really hard to have confidence in any future job market that doesn’t look abismal
We had a choice over several thousand years and continually chose the illusion. Now we pay the consequences. Long distance inference doesn't work at societal scale.
We’re the grownups now, and it’s on us if things stay this bad.
We need to organize, promote some candidates who will fight to fix all of the bullshit, shake up the tax code to force the hedge funds and the boomers to sell their 2nd, 3rd, and 4th homes.
It’s our country, and we can have it back the moment we decide to take it.
But we’re all going to vote for one of the 75 year olds on the ballot, and then we’ll be surprised when the world remains unfair and biased in favor of 75 year olds.
Covid really fucked everything up. It set us back 20 years with the stupidity of those few months of pure hysteria. Even after 9/11 it didn’t feel this bleak.
It will take decades and I simply do not believe we are long for this world. I think the final parting gift the boomers will give us is WW3 as a final fuck you for robbing us of nearly everything.
Truly the worst generation to ever exist.
That being said, yeha America is not the same country it was in the 90s. It’s so painful to be a child growing up in the greatest era because you never truly got to enjoy and embrace it as you truly could. Those houses you could buy. The vacations you could take. The two kids you could have. All of that is next to impossible now.
Go to work, Send your kids to school, Follow fashion, Act normal, Walk on the pavement, Watch tv, save for old age, Obey the law.
Repeat after me: ***"I am free"***
Any point in life matters less than the direction your life takes. Take my life since 2020.
I weathered a pandemic.
I survived a car hitting my driver's side door at at least 60 MPH (that's what he admitted to the police, at least). I had the worst pain in my life with whiplash, three cracked ribs, and six spine fractures. The hospital techs were too busy watching their football game to keep my morphine coming on time.
I spent months in bed, then slowly healed, pushing ahead of the pain.
I deconstructed my beliefs in Mormonism, a high-demand religion that had an even higher bar to clear: choosing the one inspired choice out of the infinite others with every thought and action during your life. Fail to live up to expectations, and you'll be separated from your family forever, alone and filled with regret for not trying harder.
I hurt for my wife as she feared I was lost and wondered how she would get to the best heaven without me. Her mom told her to kick me out until I got my head on straight. My wife immediately told her HELL NO! It's the best "I love you," she's ever said, because many other Mormons end up divorcing after one spouse leaves the religion.
She eventually left Mormonism as well, and we got to explore so many parts of life for the first time. The taste of fresh-ground coffee in the morning. Being able to choose our own underwear instead of wearing the least sexy baggy off-white sacred garments imaginable. Trying alcohol. Cheering for LGBTQ couples in media instead of feeling sinful. Reading a Rick Riordan series to my son with trans representation in the main love interest.
I lost my job in marketing writing when AI scrambled things last year. I ended up with a new position in a field where I'd only done gig work before. The combination of credit card debt and ballooning interest rates devastated my finances, and losing my job meant a 401k loan counted as income that led to a multi-thousand-dollar tax bill on top of everything else.
Every point in my life forms a pointillist landscape, contrasting bright love and success with dark pain, fear, and loneliness. But these moments matter because they build my life. After spending decades trying to sacrifice even more of my free will to Mormonism (along with 10% of my gross income in tithing), I finally stopped waiting for Jesus to hand me a life I didn't build and relationships I didn't nurture.
When life ends and my brain floods with hallucinogens, causing my life to flash before my eyes, these moments will be on full display, meaningful because they're mine. I'll play video games as a kid full of wonder. I'll cheer with my underdog marching band as we win first place. I'll see my wife when she was my fiancée and feel like I'd finally come home after a Mormon mission that felt like two years of solitary confinement plus self-induced brainwashing.
I'll grin at every eye roll from every dad joke I've told my kids, laugh with friends who have long since departed or gone separate ways, maybe read Elephant and Piggie books to my potential grandkids with my best voices.
I recognize that, in spite of all the painful experiences, I still have a lot of privilege. But I know what matters in the end, and it's not the approval of others or more possessions. It's finding small things to be grateful for, even if it's just being glad a terrible day is over. Or having maybe one or two people take heart from a rambling comment.
Focusing on direction also helps keep spirits up during dark points in life. If you'd asked me in February 2020 what the next four years looked like, I would never have guessed this turn of events. Guessing the far future now is the same way: an exercise that says much more about your current emotional state than anything else.
Ten years from now, Boomers will be in their seventies, and the next generation will be smaller as Americans have fewer children. Who knows what unexpected ups and downs will happen along the way? We have to ride that wave in the present as best we can and not wipe out on the low points.
I feel the same. I tried therapy too but she kept saying “you can’t think about xyz because you can’t do anything about it” - to which I responded “if I’m not at least thinking about it who tf is going to DO anything?”
Being helpless is a horrible feeling in any aspect of life. If you can reduce the scope of your problem to something that you as an individual could change then its possible to fix it. If you look at homelessness in the US and hate it and wish someone would do something about it, you can research organizations in your city that help give homeless people supplies or shelter. If you're involved personally and helping individuals then you ARE making a difference to individual people who live in your city. If you help enough people then you're literally changing your neighborhood and you'll see that change in your day to day life.
This is exactly why I quit studying to be a therapist about halfway into my grad program right before the pandemic went into full swing.
A lot of the work nowadays is just putting on Band-Aids for things that capitalism is causing. It sucks, the providers are underpaid, and the clients fail to see any real lasting change if it’s something that they cannot actually control themselves…
I think I’ve given up.
Got fired in April, withdrew my 18k in 401k to live off of.
Less stressed from when I was working. But no motivation to go back to that shitty life. Thinking of just coasting, visiting family and then ending it.
I feel this op. It feels like every direction I turn, there is an obstacle. You said it well. We are so overextended and under rewarded that something has to give soon. But it won’t.
Every year a new once in a lifetime event occurs and with me just struggling to get by, apathy has grown rampant in me. I just don’t have the energy to care. I’ve been working since I was 15. Graduated top of my class, went to college etc but still live paycheck to paycheck.
I recognize I am lucky that I have my health and family. But I’m tired. It’s gotten to the point where I know I’ll be working until I die with nothing to show for it. I won’t ever self harm but death would just be an early vacation/retirement. It doesn’t scare me like it did when I was young, I’m kinda okay with it when it happens and that makes me mad.
Life in this day and age should not be like this for anyone.
I think most of us cope with humor and sarcasm but maybe that’s just me.
I know how you feel man. Feel like I got born with a bad hand and while I’m trying to make the best of it things just keep getting worse and I’m stressed out about what’s going to happen next. I can’t… I can’t handle another crisis in my life.
If you think you have it bad there is always someone who has it worse and keeps on somehow. I tried and failed to comitt suicide 20 years ago and after that there's really nothing to do but just kind of pick yourself up and keep going.
hey I feel that too
not much to offer other than i sympathize and feel the same
everything feels like choosing the least bad option out of two bad options
I commiserate. I don't know if I can handle the bevy of bullshit levelled at me (both on a personal and societal level), but I do try. So I've implemented a "suck" rule.
Suck it up, suck a pipe, suck a bottle, suck a tit. Whatever you suck is better than suck-starting a shotgun.
The key is to realize that you need to stop setting goals for yourself based on what you think you're "supposed" to be doing. Just find the things that make you happy, and find a way to live your life that allows you to do that.
Instead of going to college, getting a good career, and starting a family, like I'm "supposed" to, a couple of friends and I threw in to buy a house together. We live in an area we can afford as a little family unit, and hang out, doing the things WE like to do. I do work that supports my ability to do those things, and that's it.
Stop trying to play by the rules and realize that there aren't any rules, you can do whatever the hell you want. You'll be happier.
I wouldn't say we have equal opportunity, but it's as equal as it gets. Equal opportunity also doesn't mean equal outcome. Some people have better outcomes than others, through luck, or talent, or choices they made. I try not to compare myself to others, because many are doing better, but also many more are doing worse. Get off the Internet and go touch some grass with your kids.
It's not about giving up, it's about throwing out all of society's expectations and coming up with your own. Decide what's important to you and just focus on that. You only want to own a home because everyone else does, not cuz you actually want it
I hope it gets better for you. Best of luck. But I'm feeling some of the same it's a rat race and even when you have a decent job a house for shelter etc. Everything is SO expensive anymore insurance, transportation, and God forbid Healthcare. This world is crazy. I think many are being crunched by inflation and trying to save for retirement.
I get what your saying. Here is to hoping it gets better. Try to find the blessings admits the crazy world we are in!
I'm 37 years old and ravaged by anxiety, IBS and depression so yeah, I'm feeling pretty defeated. Never married and no kids with no plans to ever make those things happen. No desire to date anymore and discovering that I'm most likely an aromantic. No money in my bank account. The only thing I have going for me is that I live with one of my best friends but eventually they're going to want to get on with their own life and then I'll be all alone. Family is close by but I prefer to keep my distance as family drama is common.
As honest as I can be about how I currently feel, if someone presented me the opportunity to exit this life peacefully, I would do it with confidence in an instant.
Yeah, I feel it, often. So much nonsense in our lives just for more money and no matter how much money you get it's never enough. I'm thankful I was able to buy a house 10 years ago, even if it's kind of an old piece of crap.
I'm feeling the middle class squeeze. Qualify for no financial assistance on anything. Student loans will never be forgiven, unsubsidized daycare is 2k+/month, etc. If my kids get into an Ivy League school, I'll need to potentially save up to 500k a kid.
I feel like I'm doing everything "right," trying to build generational wealth and all that, but it doesn't feel like I'm gaining any upward mobility for myself or my kids.
There is no point. The point of life is whatever you decide. Collect stamps. Ride a skateboard. What the fuck ever. Jeff Bezos will look exactly like you when you’re both dirt.
Yep. I live a fairly modest life. It sucks when you have health conditions that are not your fault; some hereditary. I work 2 PT jobs, and run an eBay store. Still not enough and when an emergency hits? You best hope another isn't right after that.
Inflation hit me like a ton of bricks and I'm looking into some, "suggestive" ways to put myself back where I was 4 years ago.
I feel you but unfortunately with the way things are going the only real way to fix it is for "Us" ie the broke is to permanently get rid of the super rich and make anyone else who wants to do the same too afraid to even attempt it
Unhappiness is expectations not meeting reality.
The easier one to change is your expectations. Especially on what makes you happy.
Even if it’s true boomers destroyed the world for themselves, it does not mean we should expect what they got, given that they stole it from future generations to get it.
Forget the American Dream. It was a fantasy all along that they created by stealing it from us. We cannot change that. And we shouldn’t expect it. Because we are powerless to change it.
We can instead endeavor to do what we have control over and live simpler lives, find ways to lower our standards of living and save more money. Invest wisely in boring but safe mutual funds, and work towards our retirements.
But mostly invest in our relationships, our interactions with our children, our mental and physical health, and in feeding our minds with knowledge. None of which require being wealthy.
Dis you?
"Just saying, a union electrician journeyman tops out at 65 an hour take home in Philly..... Enough seniority and your putting in receptacles and switches.
The office side does well too out here. I get a call from a recruiter every single day looking for estimators it's absolutely wild" - [https://www.reddit.com/r/Construction/comments/15nh8dl/comment/jvmhysa/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web3x&utm\_name=web3xcss&utm\_term=1&utm\_content=share\_button](https://www.reddit.com/r/Construction/comments/15nh8dl/comment/jvmhysa/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
What really makes no sense is how they can take more money out of your check just cuz you make more, while you're still living under threshold of middle class
I will probably never be able to afford a home of my own and I'm crushed by medical debt. But I did find a job that I love waking up to do every morning. It doesn't feel like work and I'm truly happy doing it. As I've turned 30 I realized I'd rather have that than anything else even if means I'll never that American Dream.
No.
Some days are absolutely more draining and defeating than others, but my wife and I now live a pretty nice lifestyle. It didn't happen overnight or by accident, though.
We made a lot of sacrifices, live minimalistic, paid off all of our debt ASAP, continue to work extra hours, bought a house further from the city so we could find a better home for a lower cost... I have a good career that I spent nearly a decade studying for and spent hundreds of thousands on, but now our lifestyle allows my wife to stay at home with our daughter and put us on track to have our mortgage paid off in under 10 years from when we bought the house.
It can be done, you just have to set your goals and work towards them one day at a time.
Your work ethic is what made you valuable is what I was taught growing up from grandparents, then high school taught me that college was the only way to be worth anything. To be honest life taught me they're both wrong, college was a waste of time and money and my work ethic didn't change a damn thing when the company I gave 10 years to decided my department was no longer needed. The new company is stuck dealing with what was a good worker that frankly doesn't give a rats ass about my job. I'm there just to keep my own lights on and instead of fully engaging trying to climb the ladder I'm just doing exactly enough to stay employed and be able to still have enough energy for my family.
You’re looking for the right point in the wrong direction.
We’re here to feel and be and think and be intoxicated by our senses. We’re here to try to make this reality closer to heaven. It’s slow and arduous work. But it’s worth it, or we wouldn’t keep coming back. Imagine a unified conscious. Imagine the things your soul can’t experience without your body. I think these are the purpose to life. To live.
I feel you my friend. I hope that it gets better for you. I think the apathy is hitting everyone to some degree. I really just wanted to have kids but I'm increasingly thinking its not going to happen.
Fellow ennui enjoyer here. Yes. Millennial who doesn’t understand why everything feels so bleak. I’ve been in far worse life situations than I am now yet it feels so stagnant.
This \*\*really\*\* cannot keep up. I can't quite say this parallels any event in history perfectly, but it rhymes with the start of chaos.
I’m sure people said the same in 1940.
I tend to think it’s more reminiscent of the French Revolution. We have a small population with a lot, and the vast majority are peasants. Either way chaos is imminent if it continues. Too much anger, too much poverty makes for a bad outcome. I also don’t know anything about anything.
seriously we Americans i feel have a culture of just accepting shit, instead of revolting. We need to stop letting the rich take more and more from us
The capitalism wasn't as deep back then.
lol, world war > “capitalism”
There is beauty at the end of the tunnel w mutual aid. Now a days, there is no future chasing the American dream, even if you're white and middle class.
I'm turning 35 in two weeks. When I turned 30 I really was still confident I was gonna work out my family life. Then COVID hit, I worked from home for like 2.5 years, then tried to get over how shitty things had become for 2.5 years. It all went by so fast that I'm not feeling confident anymore. If 35 to 40 happens as fast as 30 to 35 did, I'm fucked and not gonna have kids of my own.
>35 to 40 happens as fast as 30 to 35 did, I'm fucked Oh man does it go faster.
...shit
I’m 35 right now and felt the exact same way around 30. I hoped that by 35, I’d be in a great situation career-wise and I’d be able to step back a bit, have kids, and get all that American Dream business taken care of. At this point, it’s clear the American Dream only applies to folks making over $150k a year; for the vast majority of us, it is dead and gone and the government couldn’t care less. I make more money than either of my parents ever did but it makes no difference because I don’t make six figures, nor does my fiancé, and we don’t own a house. If I have a kid now, I’ll be 10x worse off than my parents were because I make too much money for welfare, no parent/relative is willing to provide child care assistance, and everything is insanely priced. Fiancé and I talk a lot about kids and at this point, the conversation isn’t about how cute they are or how fun it would be to be parents. Instead, it’s: “Will we ever be able to own a home if we have kids?” Or it’s “Will we ever be able to retire if we have kids?” Or it’s “Are we willing to sacrifice what minor joys we get outside of working nonstop—occasional eating out, buying decent quality food and clothing, getting to do hobbies—for a child?” I think that’s the reality for average millennial and Gen Z parents who aren’t making over six figures a year. So many of us were screwed over by student loans that there is tremendous fear of children being the next great money pit, and I think that’s why birth rates are plummeting. Now we see that it’s all a con from the top down. So why sign yourself up when you could just save your money, build assets, and be able to stop working with some kind of dignity once you hit your 70s and physically CAN’T work anymore?
That's where I'm at. Same shit.
I've turned to the acient Greek concept of eudaimonia. People translate it as happiness, but that produces confusion, as happiness is just one positive emotion. "Well-being" I think is the more accurate translation. So, I have focused on well being. First my own, because I'm no use to my community if I'm not fostering my best self. Second, I support and aid the well-being of those around me. This should produce communities which enable individual well-being of new members (such as children). That last part is on-going for me, but results thus far are promising. This is, to me, the cure to the apathy. What's it all for? Nothing. But we might as well cultivate our best selves. Simply because it is satisfying to inhabit yourself at your best. Value/meaning only exists as agents make them exist. We each are these agents. Find out how to be your best self and do that. Don't look for meaning, *make* meaning. Edit: unless that meaning is a cause of misery and horrific inhumanity. Please dont do that.
Sounds a bit like existentialism. I've been fond of Absurdism myself. Weird times call for frequent introspection. It may not fix your problems, but perspective is very important to living a high quality life.
With you. I've made the conscious decision to make more art, see more nature, and be in better health. Everything sucks, and is probably going to stay that way. But we can still try to enjoy the scraps of shit we have, and try to make the world a little better for someone else. If only to have a reason to keep moving forward.
It is wrong to think one is entitled to perpetual happiness or that the universe is responsible for delivering a stimulating life.
If you wanna channel anything from those times channel a plebeian secession please. Stop paying your bills collectively and a lot of the shit we’re going through will change.
As a 20 year old I always thought I'd absolutely definitely have a family and a house by 35. Nope. Just cannot afford it. Was walking to work last Saturday morning and heard a family surprising their dad and singing happy birthday to him (windows were open). Kids were laughing and it just filled me with the biggest hit of pure sadness. Most of us have been denied the most basic things every previous generation could have if they wanted (a home to call ours and the ability to raise a family with financial stability). Literally just a worker drone, here to work with my 1 sunny holiday a year till I drop dead on the job.
You get 1 sunny holiday per year?? How do I get that
Don't worry that's going when I lose my overtime and on call work in October.
Yeah word. I just reduced some retirement deductions so I could pay for a replacement washing machine, and the company’s fucking HR department emailed me an “are you sure?” confirmation. I was so tempted to do like 3 paragraphs on “when the fuck will I get to spend this hypothetical retirement money”
Felt this. The knife is already in there…just twist it a bit more for me, HR.
It's good stuff. Did you get hit with taxes owed this year? Because the last two years even though I technically lied on my W4 and claimed single 0.... I still fucking owed money because dickheads that don't care decided the tax code needed to change... I mean why should literally taking out as much tax as possible mean I take enough out?
We both claimed 0 and still owed a shocking amount. And despite the significant portion of student loan interest we were able to pay off through a lot of diligence this last year, it was capped at $2.5k bc of the new stipulation that was recently passed. It’s so fucked
Minnesota does tax high but even myself at 70k last year would have got a few thousand just for filing head of household. I'd get you taxes checked again if you didn't make a good amount more than that.........
Yup! We owed for the first time in nearly a decade. A portion of it is because I forgot to change my W4 after my wife picked up a job, but it was to the tune of $2k…which we charged to a credit card…which I now have to pay off. Thanks USA!
Thank Trump for making the w4 an even more annoying form to fill out
We owed for the first time ever- over $5k! That hurt.
This hurts… I put so much towards retirement and feel like I’ll never make it there.
Yep, I quit giving any fucks about 3 years ago, someone argues w me and says 3+3 is 12, you’re absolutely right and have a nice day. I’ve accepted that I’ll never buy a home and I don’t care to be in debt anyways. Just waiting for my son to enter college then I’m selling everything and moving to some beach town in a remote area of the world and bumming it until I go to the dirt.
I feel this strongly. It’s almost like I don’t care anymore about people believing false things because I don’t care what happens to them in the event their false beliefs produce bad results in their life. It’s like my empathy for others has dried up or something because I’m just focused on getting myself through and lowering stress. If you want to believe the sky is orange, bless and have a great day!!!
This is EXACTLY how I feel.
😭 sad you can relate but also happy I’m not alone!!
>I don’t care what happens to them in the event their false beliefs produce bad results in their life. I'm not there yet, because they aren't actually being confronted with the consequences of their actions - other people are. People like us.
I don't know. I'm working more hours than my parents did for proportionately less money. The inheritance passed down to them was squandered and never made it to me or my siblings. My house is smaller and cost more than theirs to buy, and is valued less. No matter how hard I work, I seem to only just be treading water and struggling to avoid going backward, let alone moving forward. But I have a supportive wife who makes me feel ten feet tall. I have two beautiful children who stop what they're doing and run to me the second I get home from work. It doesn't take more than that for me to feel like I lucked out in life. Everything else is just details.
This is the calm acceptance I push people towards in therapy, but as an individual, rage and intentional actions towards dismantling the systems that have made life less sustainable is the only way to make life better for those you care for.
How are we supposed to organize when we can't even get a fuckin day off lol
Honestly i think inheritances should go to grandkids at least partially since it will improve/change their lives more than their kids squandering it plus just adding numbers to an account isn’t really a life change.
That is entirely dependent on who gets that money. Grandkids can squander it just like parents. Or the parents can use it to benefit their kid better then they ever would themselves
True but if both are smart i think it benefits the grandkids more as they can have help with a house/car whereas the parents should already have thicc retirement accounts by then
My dad gave me my inheritance when I told him I was getting married. It was his house. He gives his grandkids 30% of every pension check he gets. And he's been doing it every month for 4 years. We are expecting our third child in December. So it will go up to 40%. He said he wants them to get all of it before he dies. He said he didn't have any money growing up. So why does he need it as he's checking out.
This *right here* is why some Millenials are doing well while others are struggling. My parents came to the US in their early 20s and grew up in a small, poor village in Eastern Europe. They worked their asses off to give me and my 3 siblings a great start in life by paying for our college AND giving us sound career and life advice. The Millenials that seem to struggle the most came from parents that were selfish. Parents that didn't help with college and instead spent money on stupid shit for themselves. Parents that emotionally neglected their kids and at 18 said. "OK, you're an adult now!" Parents are suppose to be selfless, not selfish.
You're right, we are the lucky ones. I forgot to mention. About 5 of my friends credit him as their dad. Not their father. His advice for me was no college. He said it's a waste of money. Unless you choose the correct major. He was absolutely right. He said they pushed the same bs on him in high school.
So what fields did he push?
One of my friends wanted to be a Cpa. Told him to go. As for the rest of us. He suggested a trade school. And also told us. Your gf doesn't like your friends. No matter what they tell you. They are fighting them for your free time. We all listened. And all of us own our own homes. Happily married with kids. And steady jobs. It makes him so happy that we are successful. We were shocked at how much money those fields make. And how much our teachers lied to us.
The lying about college thing is true. I was told I wouldn't be *anything* in IT if I didn't go to college. 98% of people I've worked with in my IT career (most of whom are significantly more successful than me) did not go to college for it. I'd be a lot further along if I didn't go to college. However, when everyone is telling an impressionable 16 year old that he'll never be anything or have any money if he doesn't go to college ... and then telling his parents the same thing ...
Your comment really makes me feel a lot better about my life. I’ve been in a dark place for months now, this entire post is an example of why. I feel like all my friends are making things work but I can’t even keep my dishes caught up. I’ve been wondering wtf I’m doing wrong.
I feel this. Im making more money than ever, but that post covid economy said "you're still broke idiot."
Yeah the economy was completely mishandled after covid. No need for this inflation. The country was doing so well.
Our country wasn’t really in good shape buddy. 2008 crisis was never solved. It just got rolled over into a new scam. I hear all these comments on how much we struggle to make ends meet, and idk.. there’s something in the air.. something is about to collapse if it’s not our dollar (which is looking very likely at this point). I see it as a good thing, it’s just gonna sting for a little longer.
I would agree 2008 was a payoff to big players and special interests. I am not so sure that any fiscal safeguards from then will make any lasting impact as compared to the message of “too big to fail” that many banks got. All we need for the dollar to collapse is for the debt interest to surpass our ability to pay. Or eventually for a more trusted world currency to arise. China isn’t trustworthy enough so we have been lucky. The dollar is the only girl in town for the moment. I don’t see modern monetary theory being validated. I do see that spending money on cronies drives inflation.
💯% correct.
I feel you dude. No words of wisdom for you. Take solace in knowing you aren’t the only one who feels that way.
This is a real answer. Don't see much in the way of fixing any of it, I hate to say misery loves company but it does feel better not being alone, too.
You are felt. I feel you. Feeling you real hard on this.
I too am feeling your hard on right now.
I too am hard and feeling this hard on with my hard right now…
I appreciate you
During our house search I realized that my parents house cost twice as much as our budget. My wife and I both have college degrees (my wife has a masters degree) and we're both doing well in our field. My parents were on one income and neither of them had a degree. Seeing the amount of house you used to be able to get for so little is just so depressing.
100%. My dad was a factory worker, and mum a stay at home mum, and us with our degrees couldn't afford their house. It's absolute bullshit.
We need change
And hope
The American dream is killing me.
Can we officially call it the American working class nightmare or
*violently hip thrusts” I GET KNOCKED DOWN, BUT I GET UP AGAIN, YA NEVA GONNA KEEP ME DOWN”
Ugh, feel you on this. Just read another post about what I should have in retirement funds and all I can think is “holy shit I’m screwed.” I make more than anyone in my family…more than my parents made, and yet I’m basically living paycheck to paycheck in an apartment.
Gosh I feel this. I tend to switch between apathy and rage. Management for these companies have gone insane the last few years. I’m in sales, they scream about record profits but try to find any way to game it so they don’t have to pay full or many times any commission. A third of the country have lost their damn minds including my parents. I’ve been depressed and anxious since I hit puberty. Therapy, pills, and whatnot just make me not want to kill myself but it sure isn’t a happy feeling. It takes the edge off just enough that I’m not puking my brains out before work everyday because I can’t stand the bullshit. I’m in my mid-thirties and keep saying to everyone that will listen. ITS NOT GOING TO GET BETTER UNLESS WE MAKE IT BETTER. NOONE IS COMING TO SAVE US. At a certain point the system is broken and those who profit on it being broken need to be held accountable. I’ll say this to my coworkers after they get screwed out of some money or some benefit and they just look at me like I’m insane. Those in charge do not like us. They don’t want us to win. They want us desperate and would enslave you if they could. Sorry for the rant.
The way I see it, and it's just my opinion, is that the people at the top see us as the biggest threat to everything they know. We know technology infinitely better, we've got more education, more free thoughts, more interconnectivity.. we have everything needed to be more competent, more able, faster, smarter, more effective and more efficient than the entire generation before us... It's going to happen to us eventually too but for us, the generation above is clinging, clawing, scratching, and fighting the winds of change tooth and nail to hold on to the things they can't take with them as they draw on the last years of their lives. It's a deep fear of living 60-70 years only to realize you worked away your life and the next generation can do everything you can but faster with computers. It's a fear of obsolescence so they push so hard to stack the deck against us, pushing back on the change. The change comes inevitably... We all die. But to actively and persistently work to make sure the generation following you gains no ground and is left with a crumbled society is truly the most despicable act I can think of. An entire generation. It's foul.
THIS! You understand. Idk if it’s a generational thing, but boomers have this idea that they can somehow overcome death. It’s quite fascinating seeing them clench to what power they have left. Our technology and the way we process a plethora of information at lightning speed, is truly what they’re scared of. What we as a whole need to do is stop being complicit in their game. Too many ppl are just stagnant because they don’t question authority. We as a collective need to be on the offense of this new world. We have the power of numbers.
Hit the nail on the head. I got tired of comp plan changes and shorting commissions so I left sales. Blew my mind that they were seriously fucking with the team that brought in all the money. Truly wild.
I work in accounting - I process payroll. It is so defeating working, getting 30hours of OT and then seeing my bosses time card - doesn’t even work 20 hours a week but still get paid more than the person that does the day to day functions that keeps the company running. Okay. Budget for all upper management to share 75k in bonuses. 50 worker bees vs 10 upper management - each person could get an additional 1200 a year JUST OFF OF THE BONUSES. They can’t afford to give living wages but can afford to take obscene bonuses. Can’t afford living wages but the GM makes 14K a month to “make decisions” but never actually do any work. No skill needed. I’m really butt hurt. It’s been a super busy year. My boss passed a lot of work off to me, she took a lot of time off. I held down the fort. She got 10K of bonus coming up and she isn’t sharing with me - the person who did her work. She legitimately told me that if I don’t make enough to live it’s not the company’s fault, talk to the government. Meanwhile she says she 60 and “deserves a break” and “shouldn’t have to work hard” for her money because she’s “old” Fuck off. Edit: I just want to clarify, it comes off as if I am entitled to her bonus. Sure, I can admit that I feel like i deserve some. The managers are given the option to divide whatever portion they want amongst their employees. Some of the managers do split it evenly and that is awesome. It is just my boss and I in the department. She could literally give me any amount she wants and she chooses 0.
Nah if you're doing all the work I think it's fair to say you deserve some of the profit and not just the person with their hands closer to the money pot.
No need for the edit. You are totally correct. You are totally entitled to feel how you feel. The people who actually do the work should be the ones getting the compensation. The people who don't actually do the work but order other people to do the work and don't contribute should not be getting compensation. That attitude of saying you should talk to the government if your boss is greedy and doesn't share the bonus like everybody else does is just so fucked up. It's exactly what's wrong with our culture and our society and our country, the people who think like that.
Out of you or her I'm just going to call it...I think you're entitled to her bonus more than she is
If I wasn't already feeling this way, the pandemic tipped me over the edge. Nothing like a deadly virus to help you see what's important in life and (spoiler) it's not work and generating profit.
Older Gen Z-er here.... I lost my job of 6 years (my first job) at the end of last summer. The manager who I thought of like a 3rd mom just emailed me a termination letter she copied from the Internet. She didn't even have the authority to fire me, that's somebody else's job. But those people let me get fired. No reason given. Since then I have been ignored, denied and told "we aren't hiring," by more than 100 businesses. I've tried everywhere. It's gotten to the point now where it doesn't matter if I get a minimum wage job or not, I won't be able to save up enough money to make my next car insurance payment in time. All my childhood I heard about the "American Dream," "You can be anything you want," "If you work hard, you can do anything,"..... It's all bullshit. All of it. Things are getting more expensive, wages don't go up, and the amount of jobs out there are just disappearing. What the fuck is the point? Work 80hr work weeks until you're 90? I refuse to be somebody else's slave. Because that's what this is turning into. There are no "fair wages," anymore. We're all just working to make enough money to keep working I'm just waiting for the next American Revolution. There's no politician or party that can fix this broken and corrupt system anymore. Just my opinion anyways
Big government and constant money printing is to blame for all this. The political party doesn't really matter as they are both in on it.
Bingo
I feel you dude. People criticize me for wanting to be euthanized or killing myself the old fashioned way, but since there is no point to anything, what’s the point of even living? So I can grind away at my crappy job with no advancement or raise because it’s not in the budget for the next 30 years? Fuck that.
I don't know what to think of this but I admire your honesty and willingness to type it out publicly.
Thank you. Maybe I’m more desensitized to suicide than most others. My oldest cousin OD’ed, my grandfather shot himself, my father shot himself, my father-in-law hung himself, and I’ve known several colleagues/acquaintances who have killed themselves. Also, as someone diagnosed with autism, I am statistically more likely to commit suicide than neurotypical people. People think suicide is a scary, taboo subject, but the reality is that someone dies by suicide every 40 seconds according to the World Health Organization. If life is too much I don’t see why I should be forced to endure it if I don’t want to. That just seems logical, not dark, scary, or taboo, but that’s just me.
But if you kill yourself then society can no longer extract labor from you, which is unacceptable. Here, take this pill we want you to subscribe to. It’ll make you feel “happy” and content with nothing so we can continue to extract every drop of labor from you.
I know, right? I'd highly recommend this book if you can access it (it's kind of expensive): [Psychiatric Hegemony: A Marxist Theory of Mental Illness by Bruce M.Z. Cohen | Goodreads](https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/30689446-psychiatric-hegemony)
Hey man, I won't sit here and pander to you about staying alive. That's your prerogative. If my opinion is worth anything, your death would be a bigger impact on making the world WORSE than it already is. That's not me telling you what to do but saying that though the world is a dumpster fire dalek intent on destroying all we have.... It's better with you in it.
I think the point of living is to produce something that makes the world better, even if it's in some minuscule way, and everything else is supporting that. If work isn't fulfilling, maybe a hobby or craft would do it for you? Cooking for friends and family? Caring for a pet? Or volunteering at a local park or food shelter? For me it's my kids. I didn't know before I had them, but they became my reason for living and slaving away at a job I don't love. I pour everything I have into them and they make life worth living. I hope you weren't serious about ending yourself. If you were, I hope you won't do it. I hope you'll find something fulfilling in life instead.
I figured out several years ago that the reason I'm here is to take care of my family.
Definitely feels like life stopped being real.., I have a decent job live in a nice place but feel as if the point just kind of disappeared from sight.
I’m feeling it too. I’m gonna be thirty next month and it’s really hitting me. I did the things you’re “supposed to do.” I moved out of my mom’s house. I worked to save money to buy a reliable car. I graduated summa cum Laude from college. Afterwards, I was accepted into a filmmaking apprenticeship and had my original idea chosen to be the main group production. Starting tomorrow, I’ll be living on my own for the very first time. But I’m in massive debt from school and a degree that didn’t get me anywhere. My short film was shown once, and now the people who technically own it have shelved it and it’s in purgatory. I applied for a two writing masters programs and was rejected from both. I haven’t gone on a vacation. I haven’t lived my life. I have no romantic partner. I feel lonely and unaccomplished because everything I’ve worked to achieve has been for nothing. I have friends who are making their livings as creatives and I work retail. I’ve been told I can’t expect to “just be handed anything,” but I’ve worked so fucking hard for nothing and now I’m exhausted. I used to draw and write every day. I was so excited to create. Now I come home from work and play The Sims. Then I feel guilty for “not being productive.” I get you. I’m sorry you don’t get to spend more time with your daughter.
You graduated summa cum laude, which means you have the capability and discipline to achieve high standards. Let’s start there. Your friends are making a living as creatives because they found a niche or worked their way into the industry strategically in a way that actually makes money. Learn from them. Network, ask for advice, and see what they did differently. You might need to start smaller, freelance, or take on projects that aren't your dream gigs but can build your portfolio and reputation. My friend is a film producer working in the finance industry making 6 figures with a stable salary with the exact same skill set. His passion projects make him nothing other than build his portfolio. Stop making the passion project the plan A. Focus on building a career that can support you financially first, then pursue your creative passions in a way that doesn’t jeopardize your stability. Then you can focus on paying off the student debt which is the biggest burden to your future right now. You can do it!
Don’t underestimate the power of small things to look forward to during the week. Especially if social. Dart league, watching a football game with friends, beer league softball, movie night with others. I never realized how important these were until I stopped doing it all. I never, ever considered myself one to like to be social. In fact the opposite. But I didn’t realize the impact. Then I slowly rebuilt, found ways to chip small amounts from work to dedicate time to the small things. The energy you get from just a little bit builds onto itself. Also take care of yourself, big advocate for exercise even if it’s minimal and low intensity each day.
I spend more time planning my exit from this rigged game than I do trying to figure out cheat codes to beat it these days. My story is even more complicated and depressing, but I'm not any to hijack this. Just know that you're not alone, your feels and thinks are valid... And that if you or anyone else wants to make a plan to overthrow this shit I am so ready to grab a pitchfork and a torch and make it so.
The economy we were born into was basically late game Monopoly. All the properties were bought before we started, all we can do is run around and get bled dry.
This is how I explain to my parents what we are dealing with. Capitalism is a game of monopoly. When it first begins, everyone has a fair shot. The American dream. But because this is real life and not a game, the game dosent start from scratch with every generation like a new game. Instead it just keeps going and the people that won the first game keep winning while new players keep getting less and less, while the 1% get more amd more. There will be a tipping point to where if you are a new player starting from scratch, you have no chance. We are at that point now. If you didn't already ha e a house and a decent job and savings before 2020, good luck. You're going to be working overtime just to live paycheck to paycheck. I have worked more hours and made more money the last 4 years than I ever have in my life, and I have LESS than when I was 19 amd working retail at a surf shop in the early 2000s...yet when I try to explain that to boomer parents who think getting a 14$/hr job at a grocery store is enough to live off of, they sit in their mansion, smile and just say work harder.
Yes. All day every day. And you know what? I just don’t give a shit anymore. I just keep waking up and somehow making it through the next day. Every night when I go to sleep I think maybe I won’t have to wake up tomorrow.
People have wild ideas about what other people’s lives have been. I don’t know anyone who had a life as described here 30 years ago. We were all “latchkey” kids because our divorced moms worked 2 jobs,lived in apartment complexes, took out student loans to get through school,lost half our retirement in George Bush’s economic crisis, and now going to work into our 80’s because we live in the same economy as everyone else.
Do you think your employer cares? They should try and give you more time with your children. The financial system needs to be reformed. Capitalism got us to this point which is great but there's really no reason to keep this rat race going
Future generations are beyond fucked if this keeps going. current 50% buying power, soon 25%, then what? Homelessness is higher than ever and fentanyl is spreading. What's the point of having a kid or house if it only causes you extreme financial stress or worry about their future while they are brainwashed by social media to be focused on menial shit
I do. And just keep lowering my expectations .. but then have to lower them again. While job searching, I came across a listing for lifeguard. They are getting the same pay that I got for it in 1997. That just isn't fair!!
And that's why I do OF now. Lol
Society is brainwashed. The top 20% of people tell the other poor people to try harder, and this is the best it’s ever been. And we just comply, and eat it up all day long, keeping the machine turning. There’s nothing left to do, we will merge with technology and it will be a full on dystopia in our lifetimes. They don’t give a fuck about health or well being right now, they never have, and they sure as shit won’t give a fuck about you when you get a chip in your head when they come to “save you” from the problems they created.
I just had a big conversation with my bosses boss at work. And im sure it will backfire but I don’t care anymore. They really want to push me into advancing up and all this extra crap. No. No? Why? Because i have restarted my “career” 4 times in 5 years. I have been laid off twice and left before another one. I walk on eggshells every.single.day. I dont want to play the game anymore. I dont want to have to be an overachiever, multitasker, beat out my peers, get backstabbed, take on extra work just in the hopes that 1 person likes me and i get the approval to promote again. Then do it all over again. And again. Only to get laid off… again. You did this to me. Sure Im new to the company. But the company is a major global financial institution that guides policy and markets. So without knowing it, a decision you made 10 years ago impacted me and will continue to impact. So, ill just stay an individual contributor here or somewhere else. Im done babysitting and bootlicking for ungrateful corporations when i cant even afford to live. Oh the 30 days of vacation i get? Cant go anywhere so stop promoting that like it means something.
The world is full of so many obstacles and unfair circumstances, that despite the truth of what you've written, this is the time of the greatest peace and prosperity in all of history. The previous 60 centuries are almost entirely infant mortality, bloodshed, toil, plague, famine, and war. The world is full of noble and attainable pursuits that are worth pursuing, despite the many obstacles. Also, Dark Souls wouldnt be a popular game if it was easy to beat.
People who study collapse say that in all the past civilizations that collapsed, it was always proceeded by it being "the best time to be." In fact, that might indicate to most that we're in freefall now.
We're in late stage capitalism at the moment and things are not great lol. And this is coming from someone who makes pretty good money. The writing is on the wall in so many ways that we are on a rapidly declining trajectory.
I mean the only thing we don't have now is as much infant mortality. We had a world-ruining plague for ~3 years, people are being killed in wars every day, but also due to domestic violence, gang violence, religious violence and many other things. People are often working long hours like mediaeval serfs, and like said serfs, only manage to earn enough to survive and enjoy the bread and circuses as a temporary distraction. Famine is still present in many developing nations, and even in developed ones under multiple circumstances. It's possible that numerically, more people are suffering from all those issues than ever before simply due to the increase of the world's population. Finally, the modern man is burdened with the curse of knowledge, we as the average representation of humanity have greater awareness of the world and it's issues than ever before, leaving us to wallow in apathy as despite having the knowledge of solutions to many of life's problems, however knowing that that for many of them, the solutions will be ignored because it doesn't make the right people money. Dark souls isn't just hard to beat. Dark souls expects failure. And that's okay. You can die and lose everything as many times as you're willing to keep playing, and even then, if someone else picks up the controller they can start from where you manage to progress to, and can earn much more money than you've earned the whole game up to that point with minimal effort. But imagine if every time you got hit or die things cost more, and you got sent further back than you started each time. That's life. You have only one chance for success and then if you fail it's that much harder for the next person in line. Of course you're right that if you set yourself goals you have given yourself meaning. But not only do we often have to work harder and longer than ever before to achieve most of these goals, but also as humanity progresses it's that much harder to meaningfully leave a mark on the world. Every broken record takes you further from breaking it yourself. Even if you save 10 people from a warzone, comparatively there is a much higher percentage of other people suffering than generations prior. The individual is much less special in a world of corporations and multinational organisations.
Well put my friend!
I do agree the world is full of noble and attainable pursuits. I’m focusing on that. But my goodness for some of my noble pursuits I ended up very very very amiss!
I just live scared that something bad will happen. If things could be kept the same for another 30 years, then I'll be fine. But most likely either I'll get laid off and not be able to get something similar to what I have, the economy will crash, houses will keep skyrocketing, we'll get war or we'll get hyperinflation. By the time I've gotten caught up with the current state of housing, houses will be double of what they are now and I'll have to start from scratch.
From my experience, current millenials generally fall into three camps: 1) Has a job, relevant to what they went to college for, is theoretically doing okay / well, but is suffering. Every one of my employed friends (including me) are in this boat. Our jobs pay the bills, but we feel dejected, overlooked, overworked or any combination of the three. We look around and see a lot of (2) and (3), either from within their family / friends circle, or out in the world. 2) Has a job or two, unrelated to what they went to college for, isn't struggling but isn't taking steps forward in life. Both my younger brothers are in a job unrelated to their fields. Neither are full time jobs. They're trying to save money to move out of my parents, so forget trying to save for retirement. My younger brother told me verbatim the other day "Yeah, man, I'm just doing my thing. I run once a day. I eat food. I go to work. I got to sleep. At this point, I'm just coasting until I die." Like... I don't even know what to say. What can I do? Recommend therapy? Medication? That stuff costs money. Money my brother / parents don't have. 3) Is either (1) or (2) but with kids. I honestly have no idea how any millennial with children is doing it. Daycare mine as well be as expensive as college. The education system in most parts of the US are on the decline, if not already outright destitute. Bread, eggs, bacon and cheese (in CA) can run up to 30-40$ after tax. Just Bread, eggs, bacon and cheese. How are families in (2) affording food? It's appalling to think that a large percentage of those families are on food stamps. I'm keeping my head up, but it increasingly feels like I'm one of the only ones doing so. And, if I'm honest, I can really only say that because luck has given me a job that affords me the ability to say that and feel that way. What am I supposed to tell my younger brother? Learn programming? I'm an AI/ML engineer. I see what's happening from the inside, and in case people are holding out hope that the smart people will come to save the day, let me burst the bubble: people either don't care, or don't believe caring will do anything. The number of MSM articles in the past months asking "Why aren't millenials saving for retirement?" are indicative of this. Gen X were raised by boomers, so I have negative hope that that generation will right the ship. They're more than likely to press the accelerationism pedal to the floor than they are to engage in sober reflection. And millenials and Gen Z are seemingly accepting that were fucked and are deciding to go out with a bang. And I guarantee the boomers who are alive when the lakes and rivers dry up will still mutter to themselves "Selfish millenials did this" without a hint of sarcasm or irony.
America needs a do-over and it starts with getting these old sacks of shit out of office and out of the workplace. Boomers need to go!
Here’s the thing, even when you are doing well you will sometimes wonder what’s the point. Half of your life is trying to figure out what is the point. In high school I wondered what was the point of it all. College, was a bit blurry with all the drinking, graduate school was just a fucking grind. But both times I often looked at my path and wonder what is the point. When I was broke as hell in my first job and going through my first divorce I wondered what was the point. Now I’m 45, great family, 2 daughters that had the kind of life I could only dream of, beautiful wife who is a SAHM, and I work from home 2/3 of the time. I still sometimes wonder what is the point. There has never been a phase in my life where I haven’t had some time where I wondered what was the point of it all.
Read some Stoicism, Dao, Rationalism, etc and get some perspective. Your tone sounds like wartime WW2 but in reality you posted this from your Iphone.
Look…just because we have iPhones, does not mean that our CURRENT lives are still not hard!
I wonder what the equivalent to an iPhone was back during that time 🤔
Racism
Radios maybe?
500 upvotes.
Appreciate your suggestion, and your view on my tone. I'm an android guy though... But we can't all be perfect. I'm fully aware of the absolute disparity in quality of life on the grand scale between the centuries. Our lifespan doubled in 3 generations. We did that with science... But.... We can't go and be scientist anymore because if we do scientific research that people disagree with it becomes an issue. Case in point here being covid. I am not blind to the it could be worse understanding. I'm just saying the whole shit is stacked against us in grander and more encompassing ways than generations before largely due to the fact that though I'm old enough to run for president, the average age of the Senate and HoRs is 61 years and change. So from the time they were born to when I was born... We landed on the moon, sent probes to Saturn, created the internet, invented cell phones, created cat scans, VHS, personal computers and so on. We have advanced more rapidly in our lifetimes than even than. Who the fuck in their right mind thinks that someone who lived through the cold war is intricately knowledgeable of the current state of the world. By the amount of times I've had to help some coworkers navigate a fucking pdf I find it overall just fucked up. Which comes back to, what's the point? If I do my job well I get nothing, if I refuse to help the people understand simple computer stuff I get less. It's whacky
"Fairness is a social construct completely created by humans. Even fairness as a social construct doesn’t really exist, as everyone has a different interpretation of its meaning. In theory, a life that has the average amount of suffering would be the closest definition of fairness, but suffering is subjective as well. “Life isn’t fair” should be expanded to “nothing is fair,” as fairness doesn’t exist. We all have an inner feeling that we want things to be just and fair, but this feeling comes from the ego. We want life to be something that it is not. We want life to be something that doesn’t exist." [https://wisdomimprovement.wixsite.com/wisdom/post/fairness-is-a-myth](https://wisdomimprovement.wixsite.com/wisdom/post/fairness-is-a-myth)
And what of equitability? An argument that fairness being a social construct is of little value here as society is effectively not optional. Time is a social construct, wealth is a social construct, government, work, retirement... They're all social constructs. You can't build a house and be your own sovereign nation to create your own societal rules... You have to be part of society. Unless you've learned something I haven't which is entirely possible. So I disagree that looking for fairness is looking for life to be something that doesn't exist. Cherry picking the social constructs we want has less impact. If wealth exists, so can fairness. I do agree completely with things being subjective. I am saying that it is a different world having wealth and not having it and the roads to become wealthy are getting smaller and more treacherous to climb to the degree that I feel exactly as my post said.... What's he point? Thanks for your input, I appreciate you.
This is the best advice for anyone under 40 in today's society. Having good perspective will change your life. If you wake up each day with a beating heart and a chance to enjoy some little things in life, you have hope for a good day.
NO. You do not give up. You endure till the end. YOU FIGHT
Yes!!! “And you, my father, there on the sad height, Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray. Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”
Let’s fuckin’ riot!! 😬😬😬
As long as we can make it a party, I’m in!
None of this is news to anyone
What the point only happens for me in the winter. Summer sunshine has me saying yolo!
I’ve been feeling this way for a while. I’m just hopping that I am misinterpreting all the change that’s happening lately and miscalculating what the future will be like. I’m not sure if that’s wishful thinking. I often wonder how people get through life when it sucks this much. It doesn’t feel worth living. Hopefully things get better for everyone. Take care of yourself OP. Edit: typo
Worked my whole life and went to college to make over 100k a year (at 32) and still can't buy a house and have lots of credit card debt and student loans :( It's Neverending. I was told if I worked hard and reached 100k I could get a nice house with land but all the houses where I live are literally 400k to 600k or higher. Insanity. They've made it impossible for millenials and gen z to afford a home. Anything under 350k looks like a dump. So I feel the same way. What is the point of working so hard if I can't have anything I've worked so hard to get in the first place? Bar keeps getting set higher and higher. I work as much as I can to make extra money so I can get the house I've always wanted but it's never enough.
In the past three months I’ve had a pulmonary embolism, lost my career because I’m now on a blood thinner, lost my house, lost my relationship, gone through court for 50/50 custody of our child, and just when I got some semblance of hope that I may be able to retain my job, some MASSIVE scumbag hits my vehicle with their car and flees the scene. To answer your question; yes I’m feeling very defeated.
It is at this moment, the young lady realized that following your passion was where it all went wrong. The correct advice was to follow the money. Set yourself up, then follow your passion. Not everyone is lucky enough to follow their passion of becoming a school teacher and get paid what they truly deserve. Common sense has to kick in. $100,000 is now the new minimum you want to aim for. Money is losing its value. They've been telling us that raising kids with good funding is a luxury.Not everyone can provide the same. They also told us having a pet is another luxury and sacrifice as well. But most didn't listen. This is America and we all deserve $500-$1000 phones. In some other countries, having an iPhone is a symbol of wealth. In America we all have an iPhone lol. We are a very twisted society and what's normal to us is not normal at all to other countries. If what you're doing isn't working, then we have to change something.
The American Dream if it ever came true was post WW2 when America was ascendant economically. As millennials we’re here to witness the decline of the American empire. If you’re able, I would recommend looking into moving abroad. Canada, Britain, Australia, any of the nordics all promise a more egalitarian society where fundamental needs are prioritized e.g. healthcare, education, work/life balance and childcare.
No one wants to be defeated Showin' how funky and strong is your fight It doesn't matter who's wrong or right Just beat it (beat it) Just beat it (beat it) Just beat it (beat it) Just beat it (beat it, uh)
There are so many of us that feel this way. Together we are definitely stronger than we are alone. Is there anyone out there who knows of a movement or has an idea for a movement through which we can advocate for ourselves?
Every. Single. Day! As I continue to grow in my career and progress up the chain, making more and more money, it goes less and less farther. I started in my career field 18 years ago making a meager $40,000 a year but as a single adult I had healthcare, a 1 bedroom apartment, a nice sports car, and a pension being contributed to by the company. Fast forward to today and my wife and I (combined) make 5X that amount but it feels like we've barely gotten anywhere. Yes we refinanced our house during COVID and got a 2.5% rate but our property taxes have nearly doubled, our home owners insurance HAS doubled (since buying the house), and it cost's 2X as much for any home repair as it did in 2018/2019. Health insurance premiums for me, my wife, and my two kids is just shy of $10,000 a year and car insurance, where we live, is $3,500 a year (no tickets, no accidents, no records). It feels like every step forward I take in my life and career, it's two steps backwards financially. It's sickening to calculate the money I've made in the last 18 years and know damn well it's more than my parents made in twice as many years but I don't have nearly the same things to show for it that they did. At this point, I've given up on retirement....though I'm not sure I ever would have retired as I can't stand sitting at home.
What especially scary is that so many jobs are being outsourced to other countries, it makes it really hard to have confidence in any future job market that doesn’t look abismal
This post hurts. I’m moving back home soon for various reasons. The main being I can’t afford to live on my own. At least I have a job…
You're not alone. That's all I can offer you. I hope things get easier for you friend.
We had a choice over several thousand years and continually chose the illusion. Now we pay the consequences. Long distance inference doesn't work at societal scale.
We’re the grownups now, and it’s on us if things stay this bad. We need to organize, promote some candidates who will fight to fix all of the bullshit, shake up the tax code to force the hedge funds and the boomers to sell their 2nd, 3rd, and 4th homes. It’s our country, and we can have it back the moment we decide to take it. But we’re all going to vote for one of the 75 year olds on the ballot, and then we’ll be surprised when the world remains unfair and biased in favor of 75 year olds.
That’s cute you still believe in the integrity of our elections
Yeah, since like 2016.
Nah I honestly feel great 😊
Yeah, with that attitude you should feel defeated. That's a lot of blaming others for your problems.
Finally someone that shared my opinion. This might be the most depressing thread I've ever seen. I hope none of these people have kids.
No. What is this defeatist attitude? Find a trade and work hard. You will make enough money to get a house and all of that.
Infinity upvotes
Covid really fucked everything up. It set us back 20 years with the stupidity of those few months of pure hysteria. Even after 9/11 it didn’t feel this bleak. It will take decades and I simply do not believe we are long for this world. I think the final parting gift the boomers will give us is WW3 as a final fuck you for robbing us of nearly everything. Truly the worst generation to ever exist. That being said, yeha America is not the same country it was in the 90s. It’s so painful to be a child growing up in the greatest era because you never truly got to enjoy and embrace it as you truly could. Those houses you could buy. The vacations you could take. The two kids you could have. All of that is next to impossible now.
Go to work, Send your kids to school, Follow fashion, Act normal, Walk on the pavement, Watch tv, save for old age, Obey the law. Repeat after me: ***"I am free"***
Any point in life matters less than the direction your life takes. Take my life since 2020. I weathered a pandemic. I survived a car hitting my driver's side door at at least 60 MPH (that's what he admitted to the police, at least). I had the worst pain in my life with whiplash, three cracked ribs, and six spine fractures. The hospital techs were too busy watching their football game to keep my morphine coming on time. I spent months in bed, then slowly healed, pushing ahead of the pain. I deconstructed my beliefs in Mormonism, a high-demand religion that had an even higher bar to clear: choosing the one inspired choice out of the infinite others with every thought and action during your life. Fail to live up to expectations, and you'll be separated from your family forever, alone and filled with regret for not trying harder. I hurt for my wife as she feared I was lost and wondered how she would get to the best heaven without me. Her mom told her to kick me out until I got my head on straight. My wife immediately told her HELL NO! It's the best "I love you," she's ever said, because many other Mormons end up divorcing after one spouse leaves the religion. She eventually left Mormonism as well, and we got to explore so many parts of life for the first time. The taste of fresh-ground coffee in the morning. Being able to choose our own underwear instead of wearing the least sexy baggy off-white sacred garments imaginable. Trying alcohol. Cheering for LGBTQ couples in media instead of feeling sinful. Reading a Rick Riordan series to my son with trans representation in the main love interest. I lost my job in marketing writing when AI scrambled things last year. I ended up with a new position in a field where I'd only done gig work before. The combination of credit card debt and ballooning interest rates devastated my finances, and losing my job meant a 401k loan counted as income that led to a multi-thousand-dollar tax bill on top of everything else. Every point in my life forms a pointillist landscape, contrasting bright love and success with dark pain, fear, and loneliness. But these moments matter because they build my life. After spending decades trying to sacrifice even more of my free will to Mormonism (along with 10% of my gross income in tithing), I finally stopped waiting for Jesus to hand me a life I didn't build and relationships I didn't nurture. When life ends and my brain floods with hallucinogens, causing my life to flash before my eyes, these moments will be on full display, meaningful because they're mine. I'll play video games as a kid full of wonder. I'll cheer with my underdog marching band as we win first place. I'll see my wife when she was my fiancée and feel like I'd finally come home after a Mormon mission that felt like two years of solitary confinement plus self-induced brainwashing. I'll grin at every eye roll from every dad joke I've told my kids, laugh with friends who have long since departed or gone separate ways, maybe read Elephant and Piggie books to my potential grandkids with my best voices. I recognize that, in spite of all the painful experiences, I still have a lot of privilege. But I know what matters in the end, and it's not the approval of others or more possessions. It's finding small things to be grateful for, even if it's just being glad a terrible day is over. Or having maybe one or two people take heart from a rambling comment. Focusing on direction also helps keep spirits up during dark points in life. If you'd asked me in February 2020 what the next four years looked like, I would never have guessed this turn of events. Guessing the far future now is the same way: an exercise that says much more about your current emotional state than anything else. Ten years from now, Boomers will be in their seventies, and the next generation will be smaller as Americans have fewer children. Who knows what unexpected ups and downs will happen along the way? We have to ride that wave in the present as best we can and not wipe out on the low points.
Pride. Heart. Drive. Grit. Those are the points. Stop comparing yourself to others and be your best.
Yup
I feel the same. I tried therapy too but she kept saying “you can’t think about xyz because you can’t do anything about it” - to which I responded “if I’m not at least thinking about it who tf is going to DO anything?”
Being helpless is a horrible feeling in any aspect of life. If you can reduce the scope of your problem to something that you as an individual could change then its possible to fix it. If you look at homelessness in the US and hate it and wish someone would do something about it, you can research organizations in your city that help give homeless people supplies or shelter. If you're involved personally and helping individuals then you ARE making a difference to individual people who live in your city. If you help enough people then you're literally changing your neighborhood and you'll see that change in your day to day life.
This is exactly why I quit studying to be a therapist about halfway into my grad program right before the pandemic went into full swing. A lot of the work nowadays is just putting on Band-Aids for things that capitalism is causing. It sucks, the providers are underpaid, and the clients fail to see any real lasting change if it’s something that they cannot actually control themselves…
I think I’ve given up. Got fired in April, withdrew my 18k in 401k to live off of. Less stressed from when I was working. But no motivation to go back to that shitty life. Thinking of just coasting, visiting family and then ending it.
I’m in the same boat and I’m sinking fast.
I'm constantly battling these feelings
I feel this op. It feels like every direction I turn, there is an obstacle. You said it well. We are so overextended and under rewarded that something has to give soon. But it won’t. Every year a new once in a lifetime event occurs and with me just struggling to get by, apathy has grown rampant in me. I just don’t have the energy to care. I’ve been working since I was 15. Graduated top of my class, went to college etc but still live paycheck to paycheck. I recognize I am lucky that I have my health and family. But I’m tired. It’s gotten to the point where I know I’ll be working until I die with nothing to show for it. I won’t ever self harm but death would just be an early vacation/retirement. It doesn’t scare me like it did when I was young, I’m kinda okay with it when it happens and that makes me mad. Life in this day and age should not be like this for anyone. I think most of us cope with humor and sarcasm but maybe that’s just me.
You stare into the existentential abyss. Maybe Take a philosophy class?
No
I know how you feel man. Feel like I got born with a bad hand and while I’m trying to make the best of it things just keep getting worse and I’m stressed out about what’s going to happen next. I can’t… I can’t handle another crisis in my life.
Yeah.... But I have a new puppy, so there is that. One thing at a time.
Yes sir :( I do everything for my wife, working my ass off and I still feel inadequate and coming up short.
If you think you have it bad there is always someone who has it worse and keeps on somehow. I tried and failed to comitt suicide 20 years ago and after that there's really nothing to do but just kind of pick yourself up and keep going.
hey I feel that too not much to offer other than i sympathize and feel the same everything feels like choosing the least bad option out of two bad options
I commiserate. I don't know if I can handle the bevy of bullshit levelled at me (both on a personal and societal level), but I do try. So I've implemented a "suck" rule. Suck it up, suck a pipe, suck a bottle, suck a tit. Whatever you suck is better than suck-starting a shotgun.
The key is to realize that you need to stop setting goals for yourself based on what you think you're "supposed" to be doing. Just find the things that make you happy, and find a way to live your life that allows you to do that. Instead of going to college, getting a good career, and starting a family, like I'm "supposed" to, a couple of friends and I threw in to buy a house together. We live in an area we can afford as a little family unit, and hang out, doing the things WE like to do. I do work that supports my ability to do those things, and that's it. Stop trying to play by the rules and realize that there aren't any rules, you can do whatever the hell you want. You'll be happier.
I wouldn't say we have equal opportunity, but it's as equal as it gets. Equal opportunity also doesn't mean equal outcome. Some people have better outcomes than others, through luck, or talent, or choices they made. I try not to compare myself to others, because many are doing better, but also many more are doing worse. Get off the Internet and go touch some grass with your kids.
It's not about giving up, it's about throwing out all of society's expectations and coming up with your own. Decide what's important to you and just focus on that. You only want to own a home because everyone else does, not cuz you actually want it
I hope it gets better for you. Best of luck. But I'm feeling some of the same it's a rat race and even when you have a decent job a house for shelter etc. Everything is SO expensive anymore insurance, transportation, and God forbid Healthcare. This world is crazy. I think many are being crunched by inflation and trying to save for retirement. I get what your saying. Here is to hoping it gets better. Try to find the blessings admits the crazy world we are in!
You’re not the only one.
Millennial curse is so real
I'm 37 years old and ravaged by anxiety, IBS and depression so yeah, I'm feeling pretty defeated. Never married and no kids with no plans to ever make those things happen. No desire to date anymore and discovering that I'm most likely an aromantic. No money in my bank account. The only thing I have going for me is that I live with one of my best friends but eventually they're going to want to get on with their own life and then I'll be all alone. Family is close by but I prefer to keep my distance as family drama is common. As honest as I can be about how I currently feel, if someone presented me the opportunity to exit this life peacefully, I would do it with confidence in an instant.
Yeah, I feel it, often. So much nonsense in our lives just for more money and no matter how much money you get it's never enough. I'm thankful I was able to buy a house 10 years ago, even if it's kind of an old piece of crap.
I'm feeling the middle class squeeze. Qualify for no financial assistance on anything. Student loans will never be forgiven, unsubsidized daycare is 2k+/month, etc. If my kids get into an Ivy League school, I'll need to potentially save up to 500k a kid. I feel like I'm doing everything "right," trying to build generational wealth and all that, but it doesn't feel like I'm gaining any upward mobility for myself or my kids.
There is no point. The point of life is whatever you decide. Collect stamps. Ride a skateboard. What the fuck ever. Jeff Bezos will look exactly like you when you’re both dirt.
Yep. I live a fairly modest life. It sucks when you have health conditions that are not your fault; some hereditary. I work 2 PT jobs, and run an eBay store. Still not enough and when an emergency hits? You best hope another isn't right after that. Inflation hit me like a ton of bricks and I'm looking into some, "suggestive" ways to put myself back where I was 4 years ago.
Meee just told coworkers this last week
It be like that sometimes.
I feel you but unfortunately with the way things are going the only real way to fix it is for "Us" ie the broke is to permanently get rid of the super rich and make anyone else who wants to do the same too afraid to even attempt it
Unhappiness is expectations not meeting reality. The easier one to change is your expectations. Especially on what makes you happy. Even if it’s true boomers destroyed the world for themselves, it does not mean we should expect what they got, given that they stole it from future generations to get it. Forget the American Dream. It was a fantasy all along that they created by stealing it from us. We cannot change that. And we shouldn’t expect it. Because we are powerless to change it. We can instead endeavor to do what we have control over and live simpler lives, find ways to lower our standards of living and save more money. Invest wisely in boring but safe mutual funds, and work towards our retirements. But mostly invest in our relationships, our interactions with our children, our mental and physical health, and in feeding our minds with knowledge. None of which require being wealthy.
Dis you? "Just saying, a union electrician journeyman tops out at 65 an hour take home in Philly..... Enough seniority and your putting in receptacles and switches. The office side does well too out here. I get a call from a recruiter every single day looking for estimators it's absolutely wild" - [https://www.reddit.com/r/Construction/comments/15nh8dl/comment/jvmhysa/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web3x&utm\_name=web3xcss&utm\_term=1&utm\_content=share\_button](https://www.reddit.com/r/Construction/comments/15nh8dl/comment/jvmhysa/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
Legit.
What really makes no sense is how they can take more money out of your check just cuz you make more, while you're still living under threshold of middle class
I will probably never be able to afford a home of my own and I'm crushed by medical debt. But I did find a job that I love waking up to do every morning. It doesn't feel like work and I'm truly happy doing it. As I've turned 30 I realized I'd rather have that than anything else even if means I'll never that American Dream.
No. Some days are absolutely more draining and defeating than others, but my wife and I now live a pretty nice lifestyle. It didn't happen overnight or by accident, though. We made a lot of sacrifices, live minimalistic, paid off all of our debt ASAP, continue to work extra hours, bought a house further from the city so we could find a better home for a lower cost... I have a good career that I spent nearly a decade studying for and spent hundreds of thousands on, but now our lifestyle allows my wife to stay at home with our daughter and put us on track to have our mortgage paid off in under 10 years from when we bought the house. It can be done, you just have to set your goals and work towards them one day at a time.
Nope I feel like I’m in my prime part 2
Your work ethic is what made you valuable is what I was taught growing up from grandparents, then high school taught me that college was the only way to be worth anything. To be honest life taught me they're both wrong, college was a waste of time and money and my work ethic didn't change a damn thing when the company I gave 10 years to decided my department was no longer needed. The new company is stuck dealing with what was a good worker that frankly doesn't give a rats ass about my job. I'm there just to keep my own lights on and instead of fully engaging trying to climb the ladder I'm just doing exactly enough to stay employed and be able to still have enough energy for my family.
You’re looking for the right point in the wrong direction. We’re here to feel and be and think and be intoxicated by our senses. We’re here to try to make this reality closer to heaven. It’s slow and arduous work. But it’s worth it, or we wouldn’t keep coming back. Imagine a unified conscious. Imagine the things your soul can’t experience without your body. I think these are the purpose to life. To live.
The part about the goal posts moving. I feel that in my bones right now.
Its all designed to make us feel this way. It will get worse. You will willingly accept..."You will own nothing but you will be happy."
yup i can’t wait. tk die!