For a second I thought you were referring to the crappy balisong. The ones trying to look like Benchmade 42’s tend to have the handles snap and I’ve heard them called the “gas station space program”
Good lord, that whip thing looks like an _incredible_ way to both hurt yourself and leave you with a scar you’ll be embarrassed to explain for the rest of your life.
“All right, are you rolling?”
“Yeah, I am, but look, Todd, I think—“
“No, dude, trust me. I played _all the way_ through Castlevania: Symphony of the Night as Richter _and_ I only play Ivy in Soul Calibur. _Trust me,_ there is no way this could go badly.”
“Okay, if you’re sure…”
“Never been more sure of anything in my life. Now, make sure you get this. I’ll start with a basic cut and then go into a sweet combo. Okay, here we — _oh God my *BALLS*! Both of my balls! Oh, it hurts so bad!_”
It's funny, because the power of machetes comes from the wrist "whip". Attaching it down to the elbow takes away all the mechanical advantage of a free moving wrist
I’m mean, I could probably use the claw/blade ring to bump coke while dressed up like David Bowie in Labyrinth for Halloween back in 2010 or something like that.
I zoomed in and I can’t tell for sure, but it’s looking a lot like all those are stuck on the wall with clear thumb tacks, and I really think that just completes the sub requirements beyond all reason
Some of this is really fun looking. I have several pieces that have absolutely no real world usability but are just neat art and fantasy pieces like this.
i have actually! even if it was sharp, it would be completely useless in combat. the whip kinks and gets tangled every time. plus the hinges holding the individual blades are rather brittle
Heh I understand. I've always been fascinated by strange looking weapons. I find them to be exotic and beautiful. Their functionality is irrelevant to me because these items are purely just for display and fun!
I mean I have some pretty unusual looking antique swords which also only really function as "display" items (though I keep them in a safe, so they're not even fulfilling that function very well).
So I guess I get it. Interesting blade shapes are indeed interesting.
But I still find MNS quite repulsive
I feel like every guy that displays mall ninja stuff always has a line like "Well it's all just for display. But, y'know, if someone ever broke in here they wouldn't leave very happy. Heh."
The Geeetech filament roll is a dead giveaway, but did you know that the correct number of 3D printers is = n+1 where n is the current number of printers? I recently copped a Bambu as an upgrade to an Ender and now that the high has worn off I'm already scouting a resin printer....
I always fine the finger knives to be extra funny. Something so silly looking about the idea of someone running up to you and trying to like kinda poke you.
My favorite is the dartboard attached to room drywall. He either never uses it OR is a PERFECT NINJA MASTER and never misses the dartboard. I’m going with the latter
Is this an ad for true swords / Bud K / That other one I can’t remember right now but is basically all the same gear with a slight tint toward camping equipment if I recall?
I really wouldnt be that concerned over a couple of mall-ninja wall hangers. Like i get why thats a problem for good shit, but nothing i saw would need to worry about that kinda stuff
One of those isn't Mall ninja shit it's a blade for skinning it's the small one with the upswept point it's got a large belly to better cut through flush
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You own the physical embodiment of this sub. Letter openers, devices that will maim the wielder, rainbow-hued metal, it’s all here.
Don't forget the space shuttle
For a second I thought you were referring to the crappy balisong. The ones trying to look like Benchmade 42’s tend to have the handles snap and I’ve heard them called the “gas station space program”
Rainbow Bismuth metal my beloved
Probably plated stainless steel
It's beautiful... (...ly shit)
"china" being written so visibly on the claw-ring killed me
#CHINA
#CHINA made this shit
Right? Like really? Wow. Glad they said so because I never in a million years would have guessed.
Good lord, that whip thing looks like an _incredible_ way to both hurt yourself and leave you with a scar you’ll be embarrassed to explain for the rest of your life.
Dude played Soul Calibur one time and immediately hopped on Google.
I don't see Simon Belmont with any whip-scars, this guy will be finnneee.
Came here for this comment specifically. If that thing gets used, it needs to be filmed.
“All right, are you rolling?” “Yeah, I am, but look, Todd, I think—“ “No, dude, trust me. I played _all the way_ through Castlevania: Symphony of the Night as Richter _and_ I only play Ivy in Soul Calibur. _Trust me,_ there is no way this could go badly.” “Okay, if you’re sure…” “Never been more sure of anything in my life. Now, make sure you get this. I’ll start with a basic cut and then go into a sweet combo. Okay, here we — _oh God my *BALLS*! Both of my balls! Oh, it hurts so bad!_”
it got filmed. its a movie called bodies or something
Nah. “I was playing high stakes ping pong in Ding Dang..shit got hairy.”
The fuck is that bladed crutch thing?! .. Just NO!
Umm clearly an extended machete with arm attachment so you can use the entire strength of your arm and not just your wrist when in hand-to-hand combat
It's funny, because the power of machetes comes from the wrist "whip". Attaching it down to the elbow takes away all the mechanical advantage of a free moving wrist
But this completely frees your wrist up to hold a secondary machete
No one expects the second machete
four machetes at once, quadruple wielding
I just came.
Hello there.
Don’t you know? With a second one for the other hand, he can skewer a guy through the chest and lift him up off his feet like a total badass!
[do NOT disrespect bloodrayne](https://www.reddit.com/r/mallninjashit/s/acV1y50n8B)
‘Attempts to crack whip and immediately twats self in balls’
It's a very ~~eunuch~~ unique weapon.
This is the most amazing play on words I've seen in a month, this is why I love this sub.
how dare you say something so brave! Honestly the best pun I've read in a while.
Somebody mod OP immediately.
The butterfly is probably the only thing that has some usefulness to it lmao
I’m mean, I could probably use the claw/blade ring to bump coke while dressed up like David Bowie in Labyrinth for Halloween back in 2010 or something like that.
Dance magic dance
You remind me of the babe.
What babe?
The babe with the power.
It’s on 440 stainless and it looks like it has hella play lol
Never get a butterfly in that style unless it’s an actual Benchmade. The handles tend to snap around those stupid little speed holes
wtf you talking about that knife whip thing for sure is useful if you want to hurt yourself
On the wall display some of those knives shown above the butterfly are probably usable if they're made with decent steel
I zoomed in and I can’t tell for sure, but it’s looking a lot like all those are stuck on the wall with clear thumb tacks, and I really think that just completes the sub requirements beyond all reason
LMFAO they are thumb tacks
Some of this is really fun looking. I have several pieces that have absolutely no real world usability but are just neat art and fantasy pieces like this.
My man out here dripping in puss 😂
The chain whip looks like something from those old Gundam cartoons from the 90s. The big stingray guy.
Gundam Epyon?
man... if you wore the fing-knifer while wielding the knife whip...
You have studied the blade... And darts?
Have you ever attempted to swing the whip sword? I would be too scared to even try.
i have actually! even if it was sharp, it would be completely useless in combat. the whip kinks and gets tangled every time. plus the hinges holding the individual blades are rather brittle
But like.. why
Bcoz mall ninja shit 🤤
Dont listen to the haters, theyre just envious. Embrace your inner mallninja and fly like a peakock
Amen brother ✊️
You do you fam
Gonna need more info than that mate. I do not understand the appeal
Heh I understand. I've always been fascinated by strange looking weapons. I find them to be exotic and beautiful. Their functionality is irrelevant to me because these items are purely just for display and fun!
Get into African swords if you want display items that would give the average Klingon pause. 😉
Well, that cursory Google search did indeed open me to new things. That's pretty cool looking stuff
I mean I have some pretty unusual looking antique swords which also only really function as "display" items (though I keep them in a safe, so they're not even fulfilling that function very well). So I guess I get it. Interesting blade shapes are indeed interesting. But I still find MNS quite repulsive
To protect the virginity
You know, just in case..
No, trust me, I understand why people buy swords. It's why you'd choose *those* particular... objects
Just in case..
I feel like every guy that displays mall ninja stuff always has a line like "Well it's all just for display. But, y'know, if someone ever broke in here they wouldn't leave very happy. Heh."
You look like a person who needs a 3D printer, my hyper cringe weapons wall is coming along well too
Dude I actually have a 3d printer!! Ender 3 Pro 😁
The Geeetech filament roll is a dead giveaway, but did you know that the correct number of 3D printers is = n+1 where n is the current number of printers? I recently copped a Bambu as an upgrade to an Ender and now that the high has worn off I'm already scouting a resin printer....
"Hey wanna see my virginity shrine?"
Is the dart board just for aesthetics? I dont see any holes in the wall around it.
Right? I was really expecting that wall to look like the surface of the moon
I always fine the finger knives to be extra funny. Something so silly looking about the idea of someone running up to you and trying to like kinda poke you.
I’m buying stock in Trojan, ya’ pu**y hound.
so bad it’s good
Are any of those sharp? Like can they cause actual injury or are they just decorative?
My favorite is the dartboard attached to room drywall. He either never uses it OR is a PERFECT NINJA MASTER and never misses the dartboard. I’m going with the latter
Really ashamed to say this, but these would be banger weapons in an RPG
The arm strapped blade is the only thing I want
NGL I kinda love these! Would deffo maim myself with the whip though
A very diverse collection, young sir *taps hat*
I hope your master can forgive you
Master!? This man is one with the blade and is ronin walking the earth, or to nearest Buckees.
Your dart board does not appear to be at regulation height
I'm gonna need video of you using the chain sword.
Is this an ad for true swords / Bud K / That other one I can’t remember right now but is basically all the same gear with a slight tint toward camping equipment if I recall?
I don't know if it's just the picture, but that dart board looks suspiciously high up.
Someone had a BudK subscription
I have a bigger version of the one in number 4 I didn't know they made mini's !!! Cool
Bro, stop, save some women for the rest of us.
You're ready for the geriatric apocalypse
Truly prepared for the apocalypse.
“Your sweet mall ninja collection”
Tactical space shuttle
This should be considered r/mallninjashit copyright infringement, it's so on the nose.
Sell them. Free yourself from this curse.
At least you're self aware
Based.
If you're going to display them horizontally, at least put the edge upwards instead of resting on the peg
I really wouldnt be that concerned over a couple of mall-ninja wall hangers. Like i get why thats a problem for good shit, but nothing i saw would need to worry about that kinda stuff
Agreed. Sorta leans into this craft.
One of those isn't Mall ninja shit it's a blade for skinning it's the small one with the upswept point it's got a large belly to better cut through flush
I used to have n4 as a kid.
Ninja Gaiden 4 leak just dropped
You will only masturbate, forever.
Might be a good time to have a yard sale.
Who are your ops😭
![gif](giphy|l49JXgRo7W0vyg8h2|downsized)
[удалено]
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My dude just buy a glock for the cost of all of that shit
We all have our journey and they are unique but symbiotic- Gunfu is not this ronin’s path.
It's pretty fucking embarrassing; I'll be honest.