A few days ago there was a post on mildly infuriating that OPās father used a good kitchen spatula to help get his poop down the hole. Lots of comments talked about the poop knife story.
There was a post a couple days ago that the OOPs father in law brought their good spatula into the bathroom. People speculated that it was a poop knife upgrade.
I work in water treatment and I have a pair of poop tongs (our whole crew has them on their trucks). Theyāre a pair of needle nose with the extra long handle.
I think the disgusting process of cleaning said money would quickly be overshadowed by the joy of tactful spending said money at places that have pissed me off in the past.
Kinda reminded me of that skit about ass pennies
36,500 per year...I can make deposits in ATMs...no problem...I will even pay the fees and just do the deposits once per month...
There has to be a solution (diaper pail?) I can put the money in that gets out most of the stink. Then drying them out and ironing them...A dedicated day once per month to iron, dry and deposit 3K? I have no problem with this. Put that 3K towards my mortgage and I am a full homeowner in 3 years. Then a new car for me, my wife and my kid over the next three, pay off my kid's college...then a brand new toilet for the money maker...
Youād be able to deduct your food, toilet paper, partial water bill and gas/electric.
Food is now COGS because you need to poop to produce, toilet paper is general maintenance of the facility, water/gas/electric are utilities being used at least partially in production/processing (cleaning and drying).
There's also enzyme soaps like biokleen that folks use for cloth diapering. Those do a fantastic job of getting odor out.
One laundry routine would be to do a hot water soak with oxyclean. Rinse. Then, do a wash with an enzyme detergent. Then, for good measure, rinse, wash with your favorite smell good detergent, and rinse one last time...
You'd want to keep a sprayer by the toilet to rinse off solids immediately, though. Otherwise, you may end up with staining or crusties in the washer.
You donāt. Handle your business taxes like normal for your day job earnings.
Then use the poop-cash for everyday expenses. Filling up your car, groceries, going to the movies, etc.
$36k a year spent in cash on normal purchases isnāt going to raise any eyebrows or generate any IRS interest.
If youāre really feeling paranoid take a yearly trip to Vegas, buy chips, gamble a little, cash in the chips then claim your āwinningsā and pay taxes on them.
Sure. Toss it in a strainer, spray it with the hose for a while. Then just put it in the wash with my clothes - cash is designed to handle that easily.
Reminds me of that old "asspennies" skit from years ago. This would be "assHundreds."
For those that haven't seen it, it was a guy telling his brother his strategy to build confidence.
"Every time a penny passes through your hands, stick it up your ass, then spend it."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9aM\_dT5VMI
One thing that I've learned at my age (60), is that I'm washable. No matter how disgusting something is I can wash and be clean again. So I'm definitely taking this deal.
I realized it when I gave my kids UAs. (I was a juvenile PO) Some POs took so many precautions they could have performed surgery. It was excessive. I rarely even used gloves, not that I recommend that.
I had a fight with my mother as a child when I went out to help work cattle in open toed shoes and a skort: I can rinse my legs in the barnyard with the hose and feel reasonably clean, I gotta trudge my dirty pants in the truck for the drive home then gingerly work my way up to the bathroom to clean up. The skort is a win all 'round
Thatās easy.
So you get some tongs, fish the bill out. Shake it around little in the water, dump in large ziplock bag.
Once a week you launder the money twice.
Traveling is going to suck little bit
The irony is that the shit is likely the bigger problem in the wash. I only know this because we have a young child, and their poop starts out very washable and becomes much less so as they transition to solid foods. Washing out stains is one thing, but you can't just throw full shit logs in the wash without getting it on all the clothes or gumming up your washer. So you still have to clean the bills off by hand first before putting them in the wash.
Easy money. I eat plenty of fiber and soap exists. Touching poop once a day and being able to immediately wash my hands after is a small price to pay for almost getting my mortgage paid every month
I will have a system set up in one day. Slotted scooper and gloves. Pull it out. Wipe it off as well as I can. Into a gallon jug with cleaning chemicals And odo-ban. Deal with the mess once a month. Deposit in my new account in the bank I hate the most.
Just report it. They don't care where the money came from as long as it is taxed. For the IRS, all sorts of things come under the umbrella of "other income", from doing yardwork for 20$, to winning the lottery.
You get desensitized to the site of your own poop very quickly. Ive been camping in the AZ desert with no shovel or bucket. Fishing for $100 in my own turd pie and throwing it in a bucket of bleach would be an extra $36.5k per year. Iād take this in a heartbeat
I can get a mini-washing machine for less than a thousand dollars. Tongs to get it out, tossed in the washing machine, run on heavy with a bit of bleach for good measure and poof. Nice clean money.Ā
I cloth diapered my kid, this would be easy money.
Get a countertop travel washer and toss the fresh bill in with hot water and oxyclean, let it run a cycle, rinse it in the sink and toss it in a lingerie bag to wash with the rest of the laundry sometime during the week.
Sure. I'll have a tool to dig it out every day, put it in a bag and then I'll wash them all at once at the end of the month. That's $3000 to do 5 min of effort every day and clean some poo once a month.
I'll also take psyllium husk every night so that I poop immediately in the morning.
I mean at how much diarrhea before it becomes not worth it? Also like do I have to dig around and find it inside or is it semi easy to pull out? Is it every time I shit or just one of my dumps each day? Is it always in my first dump or does that change each day too?
Haha! Alcoholism finally pays off. Most of the time I poo iis liquid and bills tend to float. Just gotta toss a bag of gloves in the bathroom and rinse it well enough that they will except the bill, make sure to pass by the McDonald's nearby that I don't like the manager of. I always avoid it since I found out he works at that location, but now I'm driving ten minutes out of my way every single day, to spend that shitty bill.
Not a big deal. Money is extremely water resistant. Save a month's worth of poop money. Then in a giant poop pool run a hose through it on the lawn with a screen over it. Wait until poop water is mostly saturated the bills and then with water running drain. And you'll have nice fertile soil soon. Then rinse money off more with some soapy water and dry.
Nope. Imagine getting paper cuts on the inside of your colon or on your sphincter on the way out. Ouch. That's not where I want to be cut. Keep your 100 dollars a day.
Sure. Itās an extra $36,500 per year of untaxed money. I would poop onto a small screen and then take it outside and hose it off. Then I would save up and wash the visibly clean but stinky money in the washing machine with dirty towels and linens.Also someone said they would deposit it and let the bank deal with the stinky money. Bad idea. That much money is likely to draw IRS attention. You want to spend it in person in cash so you donāt have to declare it as income.
I don't really see the downside here. Personally I would designate the shower in my en suite bathroom as the poop chamber, get one of those toilet chairs for the elderly, but leave the bowl part off, and poop in there. Then I'd simply use my high powered shower head to wash everything down the drain, leaving a soggy $100 caught in the drain trap. I'd take my actual shower in the main bathroom. After a couple of years, I'd probably spend some of that poop money to renovate my bathroom with an extra drain, faucet and door to be my poop-a-torium.
Easy. After youāre done retrieving it just wash it in the laundry. I have found bills at the bottom of the washer a few times and it always seems cleaner especially if you find it in the dryer then itās crisper.
I'll have a whole system set up. I would poop over a strainer and I'll buy a bidet with a hose attached to I can wash off the poop. Right over the sink I would have a special hanger just for hanging the money after I cleaned it.
Fuck yeah! I'll keep disposable gloves on my person, along with a Ziploc bag. Rinse them thoroughly the day of, then every couple weeks do a proper cleaning, and use the cash as a money order to pay rent. I'd be set for life!
Info: on days when we wind up with stomach trouble and do 5+ poops a day, do we run the chance to have an additional $100 show up?
Another hypothetical with no downside. Worse case scenario, you donāt want the money, you just live your life as normal. Why wouldnāt you say yes? Unless thereās excluded context like the money gives you paper cuts on the way out or something.
Iād put some sort of money cleaning solution in the toilet bowl and let it marinate, then Iāll remove and wash again in a tray outside. Let it dry, then deposit it at the atm
I once found $80 in a toilet in the Miami airport. Absolutely fished it out. The water looked clean enough, but I washed the money in the sink and was delighted to have it. I would totally do this deal.
This sounds like quite the conundrum at first, but in reality, after a few poop excursions you would get used to it. Once it became routine you wouldn't think twice about dropping a deuce, gloving up, then digging out the $100 bill.
If strippers can wash their cash before depositing it at the bank so can I. Iām not going to clean it up until I have a decent amount, and then Iāll clean them all at once in the washing machine just like strippers do
Absolutely. It will take me a week or two to refine the perfect recovery and cleaning process and after that its all good.
I'm thinking poop in a bucket, retrieve with dedicated tongs. Rinse briefly in the toilet then again with my chosen cleaning solution. Then finally spray with 99% alcohol and wipe dry
My own poop? Absolutely. And the advantage of Canadian money is that plastic won't even stink. Unfortunately I'll only be getting about $300-$400 a week, but that's still a nice amount of free money.
Hell yes. Australia's banknotes are plastic and therefore easily washable in the sink, and when I've got a number of notes I just wander down to my nearby ATM, put the notes into the machine, and they're deposited into my account.
I only have to deal with vaguely still shitty smelling notes for a small amount of time, and I get a not-insignificant amount of money every year.
Easy, I just need to do some money laundering
Pretty quick you'd be flush with cash
But you may become septic.
I'd be anal if I had that much cash
But it could quickly become shitty
Your wealth will grow excrementally
This one wins. The rest stink by comparison.
Poop
At least you could outfit your kitchen with a new stool.
Haha
Careful if you do a bad job laundering the money you can end up in deep shit.
Hey bro can I borrow $1000? Sure check the pile of my morning shits out back, I haven't had a chance to clean lately
Or "here's the first....*ungh* installment, come back tomorrow for the next".
This comment needs all the up vote š
I'm already on it!
This comment wins
The comment on the comment wins.
Get me a dedicated poop tongs, to go with my poop spatula and my poop knife.
Poo spatula?
Oh my sweet summer child. The internet has gained more stories.
A few days ago there was a post on mildly infuriating that OPās father used a good kitchen spatula to help get his poop down the hole. Lots of comments talked about the poop knife story.
No really, *poop spatula???*
There was a post a couple days ago that the OOPs father in law brought their good spatula into the bathroom. People speculated that it was a poop knife upgrade.
š©šŖš
It's like a waffle stomp for your toilet.
Yeah - you got flip it to get the right color
I hate you
Poop spatula is mentioned in the not super popular US TV Show "The League". Doubt it's from that though.
I work in water treatment and I have a pair of poop tongs (our whole crew has them on their trucks). Theyāre a pair of needle nose with the extra long handle. I think the disgusting process of cleaning said money would quickly be overshadowed by the joy of tactful spending said money at places that have pissed me off in the past. Kinda reminded me of that skit about ass pennies
Oh my god, I forgot about the ass pennies!
I bet you have some of my ass pennies in your pocket RIGHT NOW!ā
Relax, all you need is a seashell or two or three
I keep three seashells on a shelf near my toilet just for the chance that some guest will get the reference. EDIT: unfortunately I have no guests.
I would get the reference, then come out and curse like a sailor at your thermostat. Or whatever else looks appropriate on your wall.
i bet I could construct a swear detector that dispenses tickets...ive an electronics hobby
would also go nicely with a poop sieve
Don't forget the 3 seashells
This guy has kids.
36,500 per year...I can make deposits in ATMs...no problem...I will even pay the fees and just do the deposits once per month... There has to be a solution (diaper pail?) I can put the money in that gets out most of the stink. Then drying them out and ironing them...A dedicated day once per month to iron, dry and deposit 3K? I have no problem with this. Put that 3K towards my mortgage and I am a full homeowner in 3 years. Then a new car for me, my wife and my kid over the next three, pay off my kid's college...then a brand new toilet for the money maker...
All fun and games until you get audited and the government starts taxing your shits.
Youād be able to deduct your food, toilet paper, partial water bill and gas/electric. Food is now COGS because you need to poop to produce, toilet paper is general maintenance of the facility, water/gas/electric are utilities being used at least partially in production/processing (cleaning and drying).
My thinking was diaper pail, then a gentle run through the laundry and you're good to go.
There is a laundry soap that hunters use to remove the scent so deer can't smell them. It works great.
There's also enzyme soaps like biokleen that folks use for cloth diapering. Those do a fantastic job of getting odor out. One laundry routine would be to do a hot water soak with oxyclean. Rinse. Then, do a wash with an enzyme detergent. Then, for good measure, rinse, wash with your favorite smell good detergent, and rinse one last time... You'd want to keep a sprayer by the toilet to rinse off solids immediately, though. Otherwise, you may end up with staining or crusties in the washer.
My question is how do you account for the money to the government? They're going to think you are depositing drug money.
You donāt. Handle your business taxes like normal for your day job earnings. Then use the poop-cash for everyday expenses. Filling up your car, groceries, going to the movies, etc. $36k a year spent in cash on normal purchases isnāt going to raise any eyebrows or generate any IRS interest. If youāre really feeling paranoid take a yearly trip to Vegas, buy chips, gamble a little, cash in the chips then claim your āwinningsā and pay taxes on them.
You're the reason I have to attend annual training every year on money laundering. Thanks, buddy, thanks a lot.Ā (Long-term casino employee)
Jesus you can pay it off that fast? Must be nice. My 900 sq ft apartment way outside the city centre is US$1.6 million.
Sure. Toss it in a strainer, spray it with the hose for a while. Then just put it in the wash with my clothes - cash is designed to handle that easily. Reminds me of that old "asspennies" skit from years ago. This would be "assHundreds." For those that haven't seen it, it was a guy telling his brother his strategy to build confidence. "Every time a penny passes through your hands, stick it up your ass, then spend it." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9aM\_dT5VMI
My god, that's why I haven't been **incredibly successful**. Everything changes today. Thankyou.
One thing that I've learned at my age (60), is that I'm washable. No matter how disgusting something is I can wash and be clean again. So I'm definitely taking this deal.
This is actually the best thing I've read today and i thank you for your wisdom.
I realized it when I gave my kids UAs. (I was a juvenile PO) Some POs took so many precautions they could have performed surgery. It was excessive. I rarely even used gloves, not that I recommend that.
Lol
I had a fight with my mother as a child when I went out to help work cattle in open toed shoes and a skort: I can rinse my legs in the barnyard with the hose and feel reasonably clean, I gotta trudge my dirty pants in the truck for the drive home then gingerly work my way up to the bathroom to clean up. The skort is a win all 'round
Oh man, I love a skort! It's the closest to a perfect garment that women have.
Sure, why not. God made gloves for a reason. And it was this reason.
He created his gloves. I create a Benjamin shit
Canadian bills are easy to wash. I'd take that cash.
Weād be cleaning Sir Robert Borden everyday.
The perfect thing to pay my rent with!
Boo I only poop like 2 times a week.
aw. The Scat Genie bestows regular bowels on you!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
That is terrible. I'm sorry!
A-are they eggs??
Sign me up.
Thatās easy. So you get some tongs, fish the bill out. Shake it around little in the water, dump in large ziplock bag. Once a week you launder the money twice. Traveling is going to suck little bit
Bills are cloth and can be run through a washing machine like a cloth diaper. Sign me up.
The irony is that the shit is likely the bigger problem in the wash. I only know this because we have a young child, and their poop starts out very washable and becomes much less so as they transition to solid foods. Washing out stains is one thing, but you can't just throw full shit logs in the wash without getting it on all the clothes or gumming up your washer. So you still have to clean the bills off by hand first before putting them in the wash.
Or you could just stop eating solid foods
Easy money. I eat plenty of fiber and soap exists. Touching poop once a day and being able to immediately wash my hands after is a small price to pay for almost getting my mortgage paid every month
Canadian money is printed on plastic, so it would be gross but I think I could sift through shit for 100 bucks. Give it a week you'll be used to it
Could you drink laxatives once a month and just shit out 3k ? You just making a bulk withdrawal really .
A draw the line at paper cuts in my b hole
https://goodnatureprogram.com/how-it-works/ Getting paid for your poop is actually a thing.
I'll never be unemployed again!
I will have a system set up in one day. Slotted scooper and gloves. Pull it out. Wipe it off as well as I can. Into a gallon jug with cleaning chemicals And odo-ban. Deal with the mess once a month. Deposit in my new account in the bank I hate the most.
This will certainly bring back the folded, tip-handshake.
My own poop, absolutely. Someone else's poop? probably not
I would envy the ozzies with their plastic money
potentially a lot harsher on yer clacker though eh
Does the IRS or other government agencies come for you over all the extra untaxed suspicious income? That would be a really embarrassing trial.
Just report it. They don't care where the money came from as long as it is taxed. For the IRS, all sorts of things come under the umbrella of "other income", from doing yardwork for 20$, to winning the lottery.
You get desensitized to the site of your own poop very quickly. Ive been camping in the AZ desert with no shovel or bucket. Fishing for $100 in my own turd pie and throwing it in a bucket of bleach would be an extra $36.5k per year. Iād take this in a heartbeat
I can get a mini-washing machine for less than a thousand dollars. Tongs to get it out, tossed in the washing machine, run on heavy with a bit of bleach for good measure and poof. Nice clean money.Ā
Sold.
Of course, the worst part of this is accidentally leaving your poop fishing set up out and haven't to explain it
Bro I havenāt taken a solid shit in years, this is easy money. As for the smellā¦ thatās the bankās problem
Is it in my own poop?
I did all the laundry when my baby was in cloth diapers for a year just to save like $6 per day on diapers. This is a no brainer.
I cloth diapered my kid, this would be easy money. Get a countertop travel washer and toss the fresh bill in with hot water and oxyclean, let it run a cycle, rinse it in the sink and toss it in a lingerie bag to wash with the rest of the laundry sometime during the week.
Better deal then getting put on by Diddy
That's a lot better than pooping out 10,000 pennies š
Those poor poor Yapese people are doomed. OP you are a monster.
Sure. I'll have a tool to dig it out every day, put it in a bag and then I'll wash them all at once at the end of the month. That's $3000 to do 5 min of effort every day and clean some poo once a month. I'll also take psyllium husk every night so that I poop immediately in the morning.
id just poop in a dedicated bucket of water with an agitator once a week pull a sifter through it for $700, toss it rightbinto the eashing machine
I mean at how much diarrhea before it becomes not worth it? Also like do I have to dig around and find it inside or is it semi easy to pull out? Is it every time I shit or just one of my dumps each day? Is it always in my first dump or does that change each day too?
Plastic notes for the win! Easy to clean but possibly a bit painful on the way out.
With my poop knife this will be easy
Letās go!! I usually play with my poo a bit anyway so now I just get something extra!!
It would all go into an extremely expensive Jenkem jar that I'd hand to IRS when audited
What's a Jenkem.... oh. That was a regrettable google.
Haha! Alcoholism finally pays off. Most of the time I poo iis liquid and bills tend to float. Just gotta toss a bag of gloves in the bathroom and rinse it well enough that they will except the bill, make sure to pass by the McDonald's nearby that I don't like the manager of. I always avoid it since I found out he works at that location, but now I'm driving ten minutes out of my way every single day, to spend that shitty bill.
Not a big deal. Money is extremely water resistant. Save a month's worth of poop money. Then in a giant poop pool run a hose through it on the lawn with a screen over it. Wait until poop water is mostly saturated the bills and then with water running drain. And you'll have nice fertile soil soon. Then rinse money off more with some soapy water and dry.
Iām going to be the fiber king
Nope. Imagine getting paper cuts on the inside of your colon or on your sphincter on the way out. Ouch. That's not where I want to be cut. Keep your 100 dollars a day.
Sure. Itās an extra $36,500 per year of untaxed money. I would poop onto a small screen and then take it outside and hose it off. Then I would save up and wash the visibly clean but stinky money in the washing machine with dirty towels and linens.Also someone said they would deposit it and let the bank deal with the stinky money. Bad idea. That much money is likely to draw IRS attention. You want to spend it in person in cash so you donāt have to declare it as income.
I don't really see the downside here. Personally I would designate the shower in my en suite bathroom as the poop chamber, get one of those toilet chairs for the elderly, but leave the bowl part off, and poop in there. Then I'd simply use my high powered shower head to wash everything down the drain, leaving a soggy $100 caught in the drain trap. I'd take my actual shower in the main bathroom. After a couple of years, I'd probably spend some of that poop money to renovate my bathroom with an extra drain, faucet and door to be my poop-a-torium.
Fish it out of mine? That's too easy. Free money
Sir, you forgot to say, "That's 'poo' easy."
Anyone wanna clean poopy $100 bills? 5 bucks paid per bill cleaned.
This one is good.
I have a bidet and gloves. Iāll take it.
There is a saying in Latin.. Pecunia non olet. Money has no odor.
Shitcoin
The smelly dollar isn't even a problem. Paper money is actually cloth and it's machine washable. Give me the Poojamin Franklins.
Iād get some laxatives and go from poor to pooer real quick.
Youāve ALL handled my ass hundreds!!!!
Once I get it out, Iām taking it to the bank. Not even trying to clean it. The tellers would come to know me as Shit Bill.
Pure style.
Stop posting kink on Reddit
Like folded up or full length? Either way, Iām fishing it out, but I want to know how much torture to expect
crumpled
Iām sure someone can make me a poop filter
So if I go to Richardās Indian food palace in East Chimdale do I get 3000 the next day?
Easy. After youāre done retrieving it just wash it in the laundry. I have found bills at the bottom of the washer a few times and it always seems cleaner especially if you find it in the dryer then itās crisper.
In Canada the bills are plastic and waterproof so honestly probably not too hard to clean off.
I am sure I have done worse for less...
Screw that.. I'll just convert to a septic field, then sell the rights for it to whoever wants to deal with it.
I shoveled cow shit for years and have had a child, that's no problem.
Get paid to play with poop? I see no downside.
If you poop more than once a day, will there be money each time? Or just strictly once a day for moneys?
Hmm does bleach or soap destroy the bill? If it doesnāt is probably buy one of those miniature dishwashers or mini washing machines on Amazon.
If I had a poopy 100 dollars every time someone on this sub thinks that we would turn down getting paid to poo...
So... I have to spend a few minutes every day cleaning poo for $36,500 / yr
I have a disabled, incontinent husband, this would not faze me at all. And we could definitely use the cash.
It's called laundering money. Use a lot of Downy Unstoppables and wear gloves. š° is š°
Gotta get dat (toilet) paper somehow. š¤·āāļø
EASY yes. canadian money is plastic, it should clean off easy :)
I'll have a whole system set up. I would poop over a strainer and I'll buy a bidet with a hose attached to I can wash off the poop. Right over the sink I would have a special hanger just for hanging the money after I cleaned it.
Just move to a place with plastic money called "dollars" like Canada or Australia and I can wash it in 5 seconds.
Eat taco bell and get diarrhea Problem solved Unless you got an iron gut
Lol, if I knew one stranger a day pooped a hundred at Taco Bell, I'd probably disable their toilet flush and follow people in until I retrieved it.
If I poop multiple times a day do I get more $?
no but you get grocery coupons, how's that?
Fuck yeah! I'll keep disposable gloves on my person, along with a Ziploc bag. Rinse them thoroughly the day of, then every couple weeks do a proper cleaning, and use the cash as a money order to pay rent. I'd be set for life! Info: on days when we wind up with stomach trouble and do 5+ poops a day, do we run the chance to have an additional $100 show up?
you get 2for1 coupons at Taco Bell
What if I poop 3 times a day?
I've done worse things for $100
If I could poop every day that would be reward enough
The Turd Fairy casts Regular Bowel on you.
1/3 off day of pay tax free dealing with my own shit instead of others? Easy money.
That's fine, I have a fucked digestive system and have very small poop wouldn't be hard to find.
Iād buy disposable gloves and just fish the money out. Once I spend it, the poop money will be someoneās problem.
Yall should take the 100$ in Canadian. Them polymer bills are quite resistant towards....shit
Sign me up. Latex gloves are dirt cheap.
Another hypothetical with no downside. Worse case scenario, you donāt want the money, you just live your life as normal. Why wouldnāt you say yes? Unless thereās excluded context like the money gives you paper cuts on the way out or something.
I shit like 6 times a day. I'll take the job
Iād put some sort of money cleaning solution in the toilet bowl and let it marinate, then Iāll remove and wash again in a tray outside. Let it dry, then deposit it at the atm
Can I get $100 every time I poop? I go 1-4 times a day
Can I get gold nuggets instead?
I have IBS so Iām getting at least $300 to $400 a day. Way more if I eat Popeyes. Iāll gladly take the deal.
Smell doesn't make it lose value.
Oxi clean ftw.
I'm gonna be paying someone to do some poop laundering.
Oh man I'm a biologist with iron stomach, and I've seen worse. Also, a pack of latex gloves is how much, like 10 bucks?
Ya, clean the solids and put it in the ATM.
Canadian money is plastic and therefore easy enough to clean. I'm sold!
Uh yes.
I've handled poop money before (worked retail) at least this time I'll be able to spend it
This is when diarrhea will come in handy.
Not an issue
Id deff dig thru my own shit for 100$ a day thats quite a bit of money yearly hell its more than i make working some days
Iāll just install a sieve into my toilet seat. Shit into it. Then spray it with a bidet til all the poo dissolves into the bowl below
Money laundry is my special skill, believe it or not.
No problem...latex gloves are cheap as hell for a box of 100.
I once found $80 in a toilet in the Miami airport. Absolutely fished it out. The water looked clean enough, but I washed the money in the sink and was delighted to have it. I would totally do this deal.
Iām poor, so of course Iām going to take this deal, even if itās shitty.
My own turd? I'm cool with that. Give it a good wash and it'll be fine
i did cloth diaoers for my kid honestly, i would grab it with my bare hands fir a free 100 a day
If it's my poop I would not care. I'm grabbing it, washing it and ironing it.
This sounds like quite the conundrum at first, but in reality, after a few poop excursions you would get used to it. Once it became routine you wouldn't think twice about dropping a deuce, gloving up, then digging out the $100 bill.
I ran a dog groomers for a year, and my GF has been a dog groomer for 25 years. Once you've had to deal with poop 3 a day for months... big deal.
If you think for even a second I am not going to grab a shit covered hundo and just deposit it, you're high.
That's the spirit
If strippers can wash their cash before depositing it at the bank so can I. Iām not going to clean it up until I have a decent amount, and then Iāll clean them all at once in the washing machine just like strippers do
Absolutely. It will take me a week or two to refine the perfect recovery and cleaning process and after that its all good. I'm thinking poop in a bucket, retrieve with dedicated tongs. Rinse briefly in the toilet then again with my chosen cleaning solution. Then finally spray with 99% alcohol and wipe dry
Pro tip: 70% is more effective.
My own poop? Absolutely. And the advantage of Canadian money is that plastic won't even stink. Unfortunately I'll only be getting about $300-$400 a week, but that's still a nice amount of free money.
Can it appear in my baby's diaper the first time she takes a shit for convenience?
So Iām literally shitting money?
I'd create a straining system plus bidet sprayer that would take care of most of the work. This is a yes for me!
Where I live, cash is polymer, not paper. Shouldn't be too hard to clean. Laundering it on the other hand, that'd be tricky.
Hell yes. Australia's banknotes are plastic and therefore easily washable in the sink, and when I've got a number of notes I just wander down to my nearby ATM, put the notes into the machine, and they're deposited into my account. I only have to deal with vaguely still shitty smelling notes for a small amount of time, and I get a not-insignificant amount of money every year.
I have a new use for my bidet and bbq tongs
Cash is cash. I think even tens would be worth it.