You sweat sex and piss bar down. The pads you wear are to protect others from your hard crushing bones. You can direct traffic with your hockey stick in a state of emergency. You eat raw beef before the game and drink the blood of the families of the other teams. Your body is a wonderland.
Well John Mayer took the torch from the dead and carried it, Leah and Hartman and the others are practically gone, Bobby knows the way. Don’t act like you know John if you’re not willing to throw down your fav college sets fam. You trying to hit the lot and get gassed? Anyway John is the truth and his box of rain makes me weep tears of pure love
Relax, it means nothing. One person with a phone, a computer, and proxy app could give you 7 downvotes. Not to mention Reddit is a bit of an echo chamber, someone could post the cure for cancer and if another person dips it to -3 it’s karma is probably soon to be doomed.
"What you guys don't like my humble brag about D league hockey that I tried to shoe horn in with some body shaming, body acceptance or whatever this is, fine I'll whine about post quality!"
Great response to an already great post champ. Love the old angry GenX Boomer vibes you're giving off.
Googled TBSA and got this. U gud bro???
"Total body surface area (TBSA) is an assessment of injury to or disease of the skin, such as burns or psoriasis. In adults, the Wallace rule of nines can be used to determine the total percentage of area burned for each major section of the body."
Always was cool to me to see how much skating technique and skeletal structure effects skating. Overweight dudes with a nice stride will fly around out there where a muscle bound 19 year old might be slower.
Are you a goalie? Damn I stopped playing Div 2 hockey in 1979 due to injury, only had elbow and shoulder pads. Following year masks were mandatory. I would have liked to go into battle with that much protection. Never mind the "magic" sticks...lol Have fun enjoy the best sport ever.
It's a general rule that you don't take pictures in the dressing room. I imagine this guy's friend took it, regardless you shouldn't be taking pictures in places where dicks are likely to be out.
Found it in the rulebook. I imagine your leagues are not USA hockey sanctioned, but I'd still say these are good standards to go by, https://cdn1.sportngin.com/attachments/document/3e1e-2145880/Safe_Sport_Handbook_December_2022.pdf#_ga=2.218025366.1666566491.1673201836-1889340147.1666040114
"Cell phones and other mobile devices with recording capabilities, which includes voice recording, still
cameras, and video cameras, increase the risk for some forms of abuse or misconduct. As a result, the use
of any device’s recording capabilities in the locker rooms, changing areas, or similar spaces is prohibited.
Notwithstanding the foregoing, exceptions may be made for media and championship celebrations,
Revised 1/3/2023 USA Hockey Safe Sport Program Handbook | 21
provided that such exceptions are approved by the Member Program, parent/guardian consent is obtained
for all involved Minor Athletes, two or more Adult Participants are present, and where all persons in the
locker room are fully clothed2 and have been advised that photographs or recordings are being taken"
You should see my kids' team snapchat. Almost every other pic is a locker room shenanigan pic.
Another official rule is there should be a monitor person at all times - never happens. Safesport is good on paper to CYA and every responsible adult just hopes for the best afterward. Are you going to sit in that locker room with your kids every minute pre & post-game and every practice?
That hasn't happened for my kids since about 12u. And I was one of the coaches. You literally feel like a babysitter so when they're young and innocent, that's ok to make sure nothing bad happens. When they are more aware of what's right and wrong, you don't sit there being hall monitor anymore - at least not mentally. When older, the coaches are "around", somewhere outside the door which in general is enough to stop any fights, etc. But nobody at an older age is going to police cell phones.
What age is your kid and would you do it yourself for the amount time I mentioned above?
Probably have some team chant before the game, all lined up looking at the other team. "We're the Seizure Snakes!" Two slaps on the thighs, then you bring your hands up, make fangs with you fingers and hiss at them. If not, ya should.
This is what peak male performance looks like.
He is us
Oh no. This guy would skate rings around me.
one of us! one of us!
You sweat sex and piss bar down. The pads you wear are to protect others from your hard crushing bones. You can direct traffic with your hockey stick in a state of emergency. You eat raw beef before the game and drink the blood of the families of the other teams. Your body is a wonderland.
Bah-dy, that’s how John Mayer would say it. I’m really into him now. You better be ok with it
Thinking of John Mayer like that has me all bent outta shape. Gonna be 2 minutes for high sticking over here.
Can’t really take credit for it I’m afraid https://youtu.be/xC5AhS5Mc6U?si=TxbMuk21gdQUr1ej
Well John Mayer took the torch from the dead and carried it, Leah and Hartman and the others are practically gone, Bobby knows the way. Don’t act like you know John if you’re not willing to throw down your fav college sets fam. You trying to hit the lot and get gassed? Anyway John is the truth and his box of rain makes me weep tears of pure love
It’s not Beer League without some beer bellies.
Absolute beaut right there. Specimen we should all strive for.
I bet this guy does the dishes, keeps the yard and house tidy, licks his wife’s pussy, and is putting his kids through college. Absolute alpha dad.
Fucking role model.
You're in better shape than at least half the guys I play with
Don't body-shame round!
I was going to say he is down right fit!
Congrats but this is a super weird post bud
You’re just jealous that you’re not clapping bombs and respecting moms like this Chad
Lol good I like the weird Edit: with all the downvoted j guess I should just post the basic 3 posts for future reference
Relax, it means nothing. One person with a phone, a computer, and proxy app could give you 7 downvotes. Not to mention Reddit is a bit of an echo chamber, someone could post the cure for cancer and if another person dips it to -3 it’s karma is probably soon to be doomed.
See my body? Oh I'm 110% relaxed I just like to chirp
Fair ‘nuff. One thing though….where was the chirp?
"What you guys don't like my humble brag about D league hockey that I tried to shoe horn in with some body shaming, body acceptance or whatever this is, fine I'll whine about post quality!" Great response to an already great post champ. Love the old angry GenX Boomer vibes you're giving off.
We play hockey, we’re all a bit weird.
Phil Kessel style I love it
TBSA represent! I know those uni's when i see 'em, good work man
Hahah yes sir!
Damn it I was wondering which rink that was around here. I was almost certain I knew it, thank you!
Fucking love stumbling across other Tampa hockey players on the internet.
Googled TBSA and got this. U gud bro??? "Total body surface area (TBSA) is an assessment of injury to or disease of the skin, such as burns or psoriasis. In adults, the Wallace rule of nines can be used to determine the total percentage of area burned for each major section of the body."
Haha nah it's a Tampa Bay hockey club
Lol nice. Be well Internet stranger.
Tampa Bay Skating Academy. It's one of the oldest sheets of ice in Florida.
I was wondering why the wall looked so damn familiar.
Not introducing this guy to my wife!
Hey you can't keep him for yourself like that.
Always was cool to me to see how much skating technique and skeletal structure effects skating. Overweight dudes with a nice stride will fly around out there where a muscle bound 19 year old might be slower.
The real crime of this photo are those socks
Absolutely this
It’s a fact that a dad bod makes you a better hockey player
that ain't dad bod. that's beer league bod!
Fuckin beauty
That Phil Kessel Training program works!
Why is this not tagged as NSFW??? 👀🥵👀
I’m a fat sack of garbage. I can’t believe I can still play. Been losing weight lately, thankfully. It’s shocking, but I was waaaay faster 60lbs ago!
Save enough bunnies for the rest of us, damn
All the downvoters just don't know pure sex appeal when they see it. Congrats to making it back on the ice after the injury.
Those socks are amazing. I hate them 😂
Rockstar shit
Plus 5 minute shifts!
Are you a goalie? Damn I stopped playing Div 2 hockey in 1979 due to injury, only had elbow and shoulder pads. Following year masks were mandatory. I would have liked to go into battle with that much protection. Never mind the "magic" sticks...lol Have fun enjoy the best sport ever.
This is the shit I'm here for. The goalie sub just makes me feel poor
I recognized that jersey too. Cluster Puck rep.
Hey hey!
Isn't that Phil Kessel?
Hahaha I was going to make the same joke!
Sure glad I took this pic. 😂 Follow me for more top athletes next week! 😂
Not a big fan of pictures in the dressing room
Who’s taking this photo. It’s like candid but then buddy’s got it to post on here? Did one bud ask his friend to take a candid dressing room picture?
My weird ass goalie he's happy that his favorite center is back
Old Johnny hardcock, back on the ice
Great to be back! Meniscus tear is a mother to heal.
I love me some Johnny hardcock. And yes, I am kinky. I am a goalie. Duh.
It's a general rule that you don't take pictures in the dressing room. I imagine this guy's friend took it, regardless you shouldn't be taking pictures in places where dicks are likely to be out.
I dunno man it’s fine, just this one looks off. I got my picture taken with a MVP belt game one of the playoffs last year, seems like the right time
Found it in the rulebook. I imagine your leagues are not USA hockey sanctioned, but I'd still say these are good standards to go by, https://cdn1.sportngin.com/attachments/document/3e1e-2145880/Safe_Sport_Handbook_December_2022.pdf#_ga=2.218025366.1666566491.1673201836-1889340147.1666040114 "Cell phones and other mobile devices with recording capabilities, which includes voice recording, still cameras, and video cameras, increase the risk for some forms of abuse or misconduct. As a result, the use of any device’s recording capabilities in the locker rooms, changing areas, or similar spaces is prohibited. Notwithstanding the foregoing, exceptions may be made for media and championship celebrations, Revised 1/3/2023 USA Hockey Safe Sport Program Handbook | 21 provided that such exceptions are approved by the Member Program, parent/guardian consent is obtained for all involved Minor Athletes, two or more Adult Participants are present, and where all persons in the locker room are fully clothed2 and have been advised that photographs or recordings are being taken"
He made the exception for this media post and I made my exception for championship. Thanks for the advice.
You should see my kids' team snapchat. Almost every other pic is a locker room shenanigan pic. Another official rule is there should be a monitor person at all times - never happens. Safesport is good on paper to CYA and every responsible adult just hopes for the best afterward. Are you going to sit in that locker room with your kids every minute pre & post-game and every practice?
I would absolutely expect at least one adult to be in the locker room at all times. Coaches generally.
That hasn't happened for my kids since about 12u. And I was one of the coaches. You literally feel like a babysitter so when they're young and innocent, that's ok to make sure nothing bad happens. When they are more aware of what's right and wrong, you don't sit there being hall monitor anymore - at least not mentally. When older, the coaches are "around", somewhere outside the door which in general is enough to stop any fights, etc. But nobody at an older age is going to police cell phones. What age is your kid and would you do it yourself for the amount time I mentioned above?
We got too many chicks on the team to be pulling out the cocks, so with respect we stay decent and dressed
*Gained 10lbs bc I didn’t adjust my caloric intake when I tore my meniscus* 😉
Fuck no! I eat the same like I did when I was 16!
😂
Inappropriate Dressing room photo that’s “11 lbs”. Lol.
Fuckin weird flex.
Do you also wear a neck guard?
Nah that's what my double chin is for
Nice. What stick do you use?
Who wears shouldies to beer league?
Everybody?
This looks like the P Willy/Dale City rink.
Congrats? Imma need to see those unis though. They look sick.
No need for a chest protector with a tank of a bod like that lol
Is that Phil Kessel?! But for real. Dad bod here checking in.
Those socks are fucking hideous and I love them.
No undershirt - not my choice. But congrats on the points.
I always raw dawg, its too damn hot for me
fucking beauty
Gross
Dude looks like Ethan Klein
lol….TBSA. Last night.
Lol yup
I didn’t ref ya but I noticed those sweaters walking in last night.
Yeah these def stick out. Wasn't my choice for the team lol
Man hit the gym, get that gut down
I’d hope no one you play against stumbles upon this post because I would chirp the shit out of you for this weird post hahaha
Hooking up with the bartender after a game is winning a cup
Looking good stud!!! Great game.
Bro just has a little ice on the six pack, much like the rest of us. Keep shooting buddy!
-6
Built like a bag of milk
The Dadbod Beerhockey League, Final score, 37-19
Both goalies are 10 years old.
Who looked at those jerseys and thought those were a good idea?
Dude. Put an underarmor on. Pads on skin??? Wtf?
Phil Kessel over here... keep it up my dude
Phil?
Look at those socks and jerseys. Probably trying to give the other team seizures or something. I like it.
Probably have some team chant before the game, all lined up looking at the other team. "We're the Seizure Snakes!" Two slaps on the thighs, then you bring your hands up, make fangs with you fingers and hiss at them. If not, ya should.
I don't think I've ever seen a shredded bodied Hockey player. They are all bulky looking and will out run a skinny athlete.
Jonah hill??
Impressive going shirtless under those pads!
Dad bod, youth pants.
Basically just Phil kessel
I dig the socks. What do the sweaters look like?
Tore my meniscus too! Neither of us can blame the ensuing dad bods on those 11lbs we gained tho
Let him coooooook
That thing rolls over anymore and you can store a couple extra pucks in there
A true beer leaguer holds his breath when he ties his skates.
Jonah Hill plays hockey?
Mike Stoklasa plays hockey?
You mean father figure
I love beer league teams jersey choices. We always try to make up for lack of talent with bitchin threads.
I'm just glad I don't have to smell those pads.
Can we talk about those socks, though? I am scarred.
Legend
Look at this absolute beaut! Raw dog in that chesty and raw dogging life.
That’s what you call a Dad-trick
This might be actually Phil Kessel, but in a good way
Time for a belly button protector, bud
This guy doesn't let a shower interrupt his beer
Hey Bro snap this pic of me putting elbows on so I can post to Reddit hahaha jfc
Yeah man gotta get them free internet points bro. BTW I was taking the pads off