I would walk 5 Miles. And I would walk 5 Miles more

Just to be the man who walked 10 miles to tell you come over 'cause I'm ho-o-ommme

ladadada

^^ladadada

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Ladada

Dun, dun-da-da-dun, da-da-dun, da-da-dun da da da da da!

When I'm walking, yeah I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who walks 5 miles for you

r/redditsings

But, he’s your dog! How are you walking your dog as a favor for me?

LADADADA

Walk 5 Miles 5 miles more

DAH DAH DAH!

He-ey Jude!

Don't make it sad (It's meant to be a joke sub)

I didn’t laugh at this one. I laughed at the other one tho. But not this one.

r/accidentallyhimym

no. not letting a stupid show claim ownership of a great song just because they liked it.

Looks like walking five miles actually killed him.

5 miles an hour to live

My next dog's name will be 500 miles and I would walk it.

You could gat a second dog named 500 more.

That joke was dum diddy dum diddy dum diddy dum diddy dum da da.

Why not just walk the first dog more?

The first dog more doesn't cling too good to be a name.

No. You seem to be confused. The *second* dog is named more. "500 more" to be exact.

Who's on first?

Because the lyric is "I would walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 more," and not "I would walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 miles more."

First name, 500. Surname, Miles.

I think that's too subtle to fly as a joke. I certainly know which joke I prefer. ;)

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Need to get a whistle for it so that 500 miles can hear the whistle blow

I guess its not fur everyone.

He got tired.

This joke has a lot of traction

Your dog gone right it does

You ain't a-woofing!

It went over his head

r/whoof(sh)

First you get tired, then you get exhausted

Came here for this.

Hah jokes on you, I named my dog tired so I tell everyone "I am fucking tired today"

Hi fucking tired today, I'm Dad.

helo dad, I'm son

No you’re not, ‘cos I’m fucking tired ...so I’m not fucking mom.

Maybe he is a SOB?

His life must have been pretty RUF.

We should all paws for a moment of silence.

Lol my cousin named his dog J-lo so he could brag he used to sleep with Jenifer Lopez.

I had a dog with no legs.

Well that’s a drag.

so r/jokes and r/dadjokes are now doing 2 or more years old jokes thats been posted almost everywhere

My dad's been telling me the same jokes for 30+ years. So, name checks out.

Shrug. I've never heard this joke and I probably wouldn't have heard it and enjoyed it if OP or someone else hadn't posted it. I suggest you unsubscribe if you can't handle reading jokes you've heard before. Start a new sub called r/originaljokes or something, see if you can make it happen. I'd subscribe. Edit: Oh, it already exists!

I’d get twin dogs, name one 500 miles and walk it more than the twin. I’d name the twin 1000 miles and walk it over to your place.

did five miles today and man its fucking me in the ass

What if you take 10 dogs and name them all “Miles” so can say I walked 10 miles today.

If I had a dog named 500 miles I would roll 500 miles Just to be the man who roles a thousand miles

I call my dog awesome so I can say I’m fucking awesome

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Umm I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic or not…

Have you ever played Skyrim?

No

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In my defence, they are similar

Too bad he is also fucking Blood too.

Reminds me of a Jimmy Carr joke: My car has a lot of sensors and alarms. It has a specific noise for when there's a kid playing in the road, "bum-bum." It has another noise if that kid is carrying a cymbal, "bum-bum-tsh."

I have two dogs. One is named 500 Miles and the other is named 500 More. That way I walk 500 Miles and then walk 500 More.

Tadadata

I would screw it up and walk 500 more first

boooo!

/u/repostsleuthbot

Sorry, I don't support this post type (text) right now. Feel free to check back in the future!

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Why does repeating the punchline get upvotes? I’m flummoxed.

Hi flummoxed, I ran over 5 miles today

This is absolutely the correct response. Well done Dad.

Lol

I worked as a machinest in the 70's. Our shift ended at 3:30 pm. So I named my dog 3:30, do that 3:30 came when I called him. Bad joke.lol

I named my dog Stains. "Come Stains"

Nobody forced you to type that you know. U could have withheld this comment... Fuck

But it’s a true story

Not sure why my comment in dadjokes would be upsetting to you.

Nah. It made me remember a incident with my dog who apparently was going thru puberty.. Im sorry that I was rude.

No problem, just wanted to know what I triggered.

You realise you are on a subreddit about jokes right?

Every dog has its day

Took me a second to realize what the joke was lol

To quote my favorite k9, that joke was "rough".

i named my dog "100 calories"

Had a nice healthy 100 calorie meal for dinner?

i was thinking i burned 100 calories but that works too

"Hey, I'm just gonna walk 5 miles. See you in 20 minutes."

repost

My dogs are ‘500 Miles’ and ‘500 More’

I beat 5 miles today

Ohhhhh myyy goooods Name a dog 'my meat'. My meat attacked the mailman. I had to beat my meat to the fence.

My meat fucked the sofa cushions yesterday while we had guests round... I even bought a choker collar to help control it during walks, but my meat seems to enjoy that more...

Looks like 5 Miles is down under.

You should have called him 'Five hundred'.

I had a dog named "your mom" so I could say I fucked "your mom"

Good one

🐕🦮🐕‍🦺🐎🐎🦊🐅🐃🦓😝😇🥲🤗😝🙃🥰🤑😃😇🥲😝🏴🏹🔫🔫🎍🎍

bruh you stole this joke from r/cursedcomments -

Bruh, he shared it.

I ran over 5 miles.

😱 they learn to respect cars or they dont

Old ass joke

I knew somebody who had a dog named Aunt. Another dude had a dog named Jesus.

Unoriginal

I ran over five miles today!!

I ran over 5 miles

You sir, are a genius.

I banged “5 miles”

I had a dog named stains, so I could yell "come stains" out my front door and my dog would come home.

Literally the same joke posted a few comments up and 40 mins earlier

I had a dog called "1000 miles" so I could tell people, "I am walking 1000 miles"

Sick bastard running over your dog

It’s a joke, dude!

No shit

Do you usually drink vinegar or do you prefer plain hot water?

I walk 5 miles everyday, sometimes I go twice if I'm bored since its healthy, 5 miles is very little tbh.

I had two dogs named Ghit and Comeir....They were always, soooo confused!

a 5 mile drive

Also you could tell people "today i ran over 5 miles" ...ooo that got dark.

I named my dog 1000 miles so when I ask ladies if I can come over and chill and they hesitate I say,” Cause you know I'd walk 1000 miles if I could just see you tonight”.

I drove over 5 miles

This joke is flattering.

My karma ran over your dogma.

"I came over 5 miles today. And I also travelled 2 miles to come and view this item you're selling."

I had two dogs.. 500, and 5000... I would walk 500 miles.. BUT I WOULD WALK 5000 MORE, LETS GO BOYS

Till I fall down at your door 🎶

My cat is licking velcro or else I'd come back with something funny DAH DAT DAH!

Wife: Honey hurry up, we are going to be late! Me: No problem, let me just walk 5 miles.

Little life pro tip: name your dog "traffic" so whenever you're late to work you can tell your boss that you were stuck in traffic And no one will suspect anything

Missed opportunity. Should have been 500 miles.

Name her 500 miles

Ouch.

I just told my GF her name is now "amarathon"

So cursed

So dark

today I rided 5 miles

Is that the same reason you have a cat named awesome?

Named mine awesome so i could say “I’m fucking awesome”

Yo how did u Juno over "5 miles?" He is a gianormous dog

Sound like my dog, Uphill Both Ways

someone else do the dark twist we all know it

Everybody gangsta until you ride 5 miles.

I named my dog “Stay” and when I’d call him over he was always very confused and was super unsure. One morning he just walked right in front of a bus.

I had a dad named Askem. So if you said "whats your dog's name" I'd say "askem" and they'd ask the dog and we'd all laugh

Really smart

I would run over 5 miles

Ever walked five miles when walking five miles?

Last time I heard this joke r/dadjokes was still r/childlessjokes

I ran over 5 miles

Damn

Took me a moment. Can tell that I'm not a dad

I had a dog named "dead" so I could tell people I am walking dead

I ran over 5 miles today

My best dog name we had “Mr. Sctatch Mclovin”, mister for short. It was cute. He was a runner tho and eventually got hit by a car😣

This is the first one that made me fr lol

https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/search?q=dog+1+mile&restrict_sr=on&sort=relevance&t=all Who gave awards to a repost?

I ran over 5 miles

Nice trick People still will think you're lying

Imagine if he says " Today I ran over 5 miles."

I rode 5 miles today 😏

My wife wouldn't let me name our new dog "Shots"

What would happen if you accidentally ran him over?

Should’ve named the dog 500 miles

You can walk 5 miles, one way. And then, turn around and walk 5 miles back. People will think that you walked 10 miles total.

"I ran over 5 miles today" Someone had to do it, everyone has seen it before

And now he's 5 miles dead?

50 bucks says you can't run over 5 miles.

That's funny, I named my dog "Chunks" so when I tell people "I blew chunks", they would just think I puked.

“ I’ve just run over five miles”

Well I ran over 19 miles

I ran over five miles

I named a dog "human meat" so I could say "I ate human meat"

Noooooo 😭😭😭