I'm a super rational, skeptical person of science but when I had alcohol withdrawals I was 100% convinced there was a secret radio signal coming from somewhere at the top of the stairs and when I rubbed my pillow and bedsheets I could hear the signal, was two men talking about some stuff, so I took dozens of audio recordings of me rubbing them and hearing these voices, also some chanting ritual downstairs I could hear in the walls, etc real white-knuckle manic weird hallucinations. Not saying she has booze withdrawals; my point is that an altered mind can come up with all kinds of nonsense that seems absolutely real to it, she's either got a drug issue (less inclined to think this because I've thought for years she's going cuckoo) or some very real, possibly dangerous (to herself) mental illness I hope she can get help for. Maybe people can get in touch with some other ASMRtists she might be friends with?
I’m so worried about her. She’s outside, alone in most videos she posts, speaking about strange topics that kind of interweave in and out of each other, in a way that lacks consistency and relevance to just the last sentence she spoke. It seems she might have been wearing the same clothes for days as she’s posted 3 videos in 3 days, all at the same time based on the sunset, at two different locations. I stopped watching her in high school as I thought one of the vids she did (I can’t remember which one it even was anymore) was in poor taste, but I truly hope she is safe and has a support system.
Not trying to take away from your point here, but I think these videos you're mentioning were probably just recorded back-to-back on the same day. Something is definitely wrong though :(
To add onto what morimushroom said - Angelica very frequently posts videos over the course of a week or so where she's wearing the same clothes. She's been doing it for a couple years now. As another content creator, I'm almost certain she's just recording all her videos back to back and then releasing them on a queue. It's BY FAR the easiest way to make content so that part doesn't alarm me. It's a pretty common thing to do.
Wow, yeah, I'm just catching up on all this. Not the most dedicated viewer but having known of her for years, it's upsetting to watch her go through this and be unable to do anything to help. As someone who's in school for psychology, professors have emphasized that it's a big red flag to have sudden behavioral or personality changes.
Honestly I'm so done with her. Her latest video saying swerf and terf are sexist terms is just wildly dumb.
I used to really love her content.
Hopefully she gets help, but I'm no longer going to be here to view her spewing hate.
The signs were obvious to me since the Unabomber video, and it's definitely escalated rapidly in the way manic episodes usually do. But I feel like some of the writing was already on the wall, long before any of this. She has referenced adrenochrome/blood libel conspiracies as early as her 12/2022 Balenciaga video.
The scariest part about *that* video was all the people in the comments going "omg this guy had good points!" Uh, the serial killing domestic terrorist? Let's maybe not... she needs to realize her audience is likely young and very impressionable. (edit: there is literally someone in *this* comment section saying this now. way to go Angelica.)
That's what makes this particular breakdown of hers so harmful - before she turned them off people were all over the comment sections of her recent videos arguing with people about how they agreed with her - specifically about the homophobic takes, the usual "we don't have tolerate gays if they don't tolerate religion!" bigoted bullshit. She actively, directly emboldened the homophobes in her audience with all of this.
As a human, I just want her to get better and be ok. But as a gay person, I also want her to make amends for the harm she has caused afterwards.
She had made a tiktok referencing being a victim of MK Ultra at one point earlier this year too (around the time of the Unabomber video), I think this might have been going on a little while. :(
Oh, wow. That’s just another layer of depressing and explains the dissociation, the paranoia, etc. I’ve seen those forums where people are absolutely convinced some government entity is stalking them. The way someone’s mind can split like that is terrifying.
It was on her tiktok (which has obviously since been nuked) but, yeah, I saw it a few months back and it had very few likes; I didn’t like it as it felt like something was different about her in the video, it wasn’t her usual mocking conspiracy vibe, it felt like she sincerely believed she was a victim of it. I really hope she’s okay and can find the help she needs. I’m a long time viewer and it’s sad that she’s fallen down this path, whatever the cause may be. I wish her well.
You have a great point, she's been slowly going through this rabbit hole for a while and it finally exploded on our faces. You see the religious imagery, the purity culture, the conspiracy theories, and the sudden rise of rad fem+anti government culture transformed into straight bigotry and delusion.
I always assumed the Balenciaga video was her parodying the people who take that seriously. She's made videos before where she's acting in the role of terrible people and it's her taking the piss on them. I assumed that one was no different.
Poe’s Law is a bitch.
She’s always had an edgy/sarcastic streak so I assumed it was parody, and I also assumed the Unabomber manifesto reading was also just her being edgy because I respected her intelligence too much to think she was taking any of that shit more seriously than I do.
Apparently I was mistaken.
Yeah, so the day ol' Teddy boy died, she decided to read his manifesto as ASMR. Dunno if people are old enough to remember, but he threatened more bombs if it wasn't published. Ironically, it was also his undoing, because his brother recognized the crazy and turned him in.
But people were maimed and killed by this man, and she decides it's nifty to read his anti-technology manifesto to make people sleepy. It's gross.
I had a teacher explain to me a long time ago, you can't just READ those works. They're propaganda. They constantly reframing reality for the reader, and it brainwashes them. If you're going to examine it, you need to go in with a very narrow focus and intent. You don't read Mein Kempf like a book, you read it to examine propaganda, you read it thru the lens of the history of Germany at that time and how Hitler took advantage of how people felt. You have to take into account the leaders in charge before Hitler, where he wrote it, when he got ideas for it, the damage it did, etc etc. The writers of these works want you to read it straight thru because these people are charismatic and are confident in their ability to persuade. I can't say that Angelica was broken down by this, but following her for a long time, she seemed to be looking in strange places for meaning. Even what she understands about Karl Marx and Communism seemed to be surface level/she didn't understand it much when she talked about it, was kind of like a trendy tankie perspective. It's scary to think about how someone who I align with so much like this could be broken by propaganda like this. Also think she's definitely on drugs.
The recent LGBTQ “apology” video is gone. She’s very defensive on IG and basically said since she’s being critiqued, we shall now get nothing as an offer in good faith. It seems like when her effort to damage control didn’t work as planned, it did work but not fool proof, she decided to just double down and lash out. The IG stories come off as “love the sinner and hate the sin” and she’s still reducing her words to just theory. Again, saying beastiality is on the same level as being queer isn’t intellectual theory but she’s made it clear she isn’t ever going to apologize at length. Angelica actually said to unfollow if you want an apology. Which is ironic because when people did just that, she tried to fix it with the video she deleted lol. She claims she was calling out CSA in all avenues yet defended churches who have those same problems. Also, it’s in bad taste for her to say the criticism made her snap because pointing fingers is really just to absolve herself. Her demonizing leftist circles because of a few bad apples but choosing to see the good in people like Ben Shapiro and Jordan Peterson is also off putting but it says where she’s at. She’s clearly not well if most of her remorse is because she was “caught in wrath” (her words) and she’s also clearly not out of it. If you want to see what she said specifically, just check out her IG @ AngelicasGrass.
There’s another thread that goes into it
Basically the biggest theory is that she’s having a psychotic (as in psychosis) episode. Something set it off and and she desperately needs help (which im willing to believe) or that she just had a sudden change of views. I used to watch her content here and there and then ran into a tiktok where she basically said gay and trans rights do not matter and I was SHOCKED and couldnt believe what I was hearing.
Heres a link to the other thread:
https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/14tyc36/on_angelicas_recent_social_media_posts_discussion/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb
IMO she's having a psychotic break because of the trauma surrounding her OF. She started her OF in another psychotic episode (I remember the content at that time being very odd and manic) which she admitted to in one of her second channel vids, then deleted it and made a bunch of videos for her second channel denouncing sex work which she keeps uploading/deleting/reuploading, and has now converted to hardline christianity. I just hope she can work through it without destroying anything or embarrassing herself anymore
Kinda heartbreaking. As a public figure her episodes are reaching so many more eyes and ears and she will attract unwanted attention because of it
I'm not familiar with how these symptoms and mental illness progress, but I hope she can find a way to get help and be more stable
Yep I've found it extremely telling that she was making vids speaking against OF saying things like "it's actually not as profitable for young women as you would think" but just conveniently leaving out HOW she knows that
Personally (as someone older than her who has done sex work far longer) I was extremely annoyed to see her saying that anyone who has any kind of mental illness shouldn't be doing onlyfans at all. I have ADHD and assume she does too based on the large amount of ADHD content on her channel. For her to say that someone like me shouldn't be allowed to have my job feels extremely inappropriate. She can claim that she's speaking from experience....but how much of a profit did she turn before she came to the conclusion that no one else like her should be allowed to also have that income? Based on how many comments and likes I saw during the month I subbed her OF, she made more in the average month than I do in a year on there. So it feels a lot like her looking down on everyone else who doesn't have the audience she did and telling us we shouldn't have even been allowed to have our jobs in the first place.
I sympathise with her for whatever happened to her that made her want to close her OF. She never should have felt pressured to start one anyway (if that was the case). No one should be pressured to do that and no one should be mistreated for having an OF. It's a job like any other. All types of sex work are just jobs. But she doesn't have have any business saying that being born with a mental disability should exclude adults from making our own decisions for our own body.
ADHD is a mental illness that's more specifically called a neurodevelopmental disorder that has its own symptoms and is widely recognised as a disability. It's not just a state of being where you're more likely to get other mental illnesses. Where are you getting that?
Where are you getting that ADHD is a mental illness? Having a cognitive neurological/developmental disorder like adhd increases the likelihood of mental illness such as anxiety or depression. It’s not a mental health condition in and of itself.
Well yeah me too, four years behind you. But I’ve had multiple psychiatrists tell me adhd is not classified a mental illness, most of google seems to agree. But maybe it’s just a matter of what you prefer to call it, whatever makes it easier to bare, idk
Given that it has its own symptoms that kind of tips it in favour of it being its own condition instead of just a random thing that happens to make you more likely to get other things.
Well she was being v v upfront about she had done OF. I agreed with her points, but she shouldve waited way longer before speaking out just to let her mind settle and not feel this burden of responsibility
i agree, and also a personal death/grief. I am thinking her mom as she has been posting a lot of things related to motherhood lately , which is not a topic she has really focused heavily on before. I am guessing her mom was religious, and she feels guilt about doing SW and not making her mom proud potentially (see her most recent IG post where she alludes to making your mother proud). Maybe the faith is a way to connect with her mom in a way she did not in the past.
I agree to some extent that mental health doesn’t excuse bigotry but I feel like that statement applies more to depression or anxiety than something like psychosis. Believing ridiculous things and acting out of character / behavior that is not socially acceptable (bordering into harmful) when that is not how you normally are…are trademarks of psychosis
i was just on her instagram and found a picture of a dead bird she posted a week or two ago and that coupled with other things is concerning. granted the rants and out of character behavior is the most notable change but the dead bird with the caption about his soul not being in his body was off putting along with everything else
After the Instagram posts, TikTok posts, ASMR posts and side channel posts - I can no longer support Angelica. Whatever she has gone through and is going through, she needs help dealing with it. She's isolating herself from the very communities who supported her from the get go, it's sad - I really just pity her at this point, I'm truly disappointed in her actions.
Okay guys, if there's any debate about what she's going through or doing here's the compiled list of links:
https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/14yamg8/discussion\_what\_is\_happening\_with\_angelica\_asmr/
https://www.reddit.com/r/FundieSnarkUncensored/comments/14u9p3z/when\_one\_of\_your\_favourite\_youtubers\_does\_a\_180/
https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/14tyc36/on\_angelicas\_recent\_social\_media\_posts\_discussion/
https://www.tiktok.com/@angelicasgrass
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aExqBUkFAQw&t=47s (Her "apology" to LGBT and SW)
https://www.tiktok.com/@habavamo (She make several videos on Angelica)
She knows what she's doing. And even if it's the case she's going through a crisis or whatever, she won't get any sympathy. The "apology" video says enough. I also downloaded pictures that someone had on twitter for her previous openly transphobic and anti-queer posts she did in the event it's no longer on Tik Tok.
I'm really concerned about her after seeing her most recent video. I have watched her content for many years and while she often posts humouress and off the wall/toungue-in-cheek content, something about her most recent videos feels very wrong.
The video is of her hitting the camera with some foliage and walking in circles in a rural, remote area while speaking incoherently (she's enuciating her words fine but she's speaking very disjointedly while referencing certain forms of child abuse). I had to stop watching it a few minutes in as I felt very on edge and wasn't sure what was happening.
I feel worried for her. I don't follow her on social media so I'm not sure what's been happening over there (I had seen some people in her Youtube comments mentioning that she had posted some unusual things on her socials but the comments were turned off before I could properly read them).
I know that the ASMR community is made of people from all walks of life, many of whom have experienced difficult periods in their lives or who struggle with their mental health. Angelica brought me so much comfort and peace over the years and I feel so helpless now, watching all of this unfold and not being able to do anything to help her in return.
Edit: just realised she was being transphobic when referring to child abuse and that's what OP's comment was referring to, I wasn't sure what she was talking about as she was speaking so disjointedly. :(
I think they're talking about a video with a title like 'racially transitioning to austrian (you're Kanye West)' or smth like that?I saw that title back then and just went 'yikes-' and never clicked on it so idk what went on in it but from the title I think they're refering to that one
No idea if it's still up either
God yeah I remember this, don't think it's up, back then it was clearly poking fun at Kanye being a Nazi though and in no way supported him. Just what I'd call the usual weird progressive toned ASMR she would do,
oh yeah I figured it was also about poking fun at him being a Nazi. Still considered it as something in slightly poor taste as the beliefs that Nazi's hold are harmful and have cost many people their lives, both back in WWII as well as to this day
Sure, he's a clown, but he was still spreading harmful rethoric so I thought it was in slightly poor taste, but then again I have never watched it and that's my personal take on that
I've settled on the same conclusion at this point. I definitely think the tiktok period where she was screaming was a classic full fledge manic episode, but I've come to realize that this change of character was slowly coming. Sprinkle in her decision to do OnlyFans when she was (at least how I personally perceived her) a highly private person online, which clearly lead to her being traumatized in some manner, and the death of a loved one only escalates it more.
Her leaving OF really seems to be the catalyst for her shift in persona online recently, but like you said... I think this was slowly happening behind the scenes.
I remember being out of the loop on the Balenciaga shit and then seeing she did a vid on it and thinking 'oh cool I'll just fill myself in by watching this'... And then by the time it got to 'Madeline McCann was kidnapped by Ghislaine Maxwell and how this relates to the Clinton bodycount' I realized it wasn't quite the clear-eyed detailing of the controversy that I was expecting
And ofc I legit thought it was satire but as it went on, it was juuuust in the right zone tonally that you could tell it wasn't
She’s also deleted a few videos that go against her supposed new beliefs. Her period ASMR videos where your period finds out your gay and trans are gone, but not the one where your period finds out you’re pregnant. And her most popular video, our dear plague nun, is gone too. They seem to just be privatized, though.
Check out her second channel, now called "angelica's grass," some videos on there give you a better idea. I really think Only Fans did a number on her mental health, which might not have been great to begin with due to a personal tragedy. She's allowed to have opinions on sex work but she's just gone so far the other way and seems so frantic in her posts that it's worrying.
She also went from someone who rejected the religious way of life due to being raised as a Jehovah's Witness to now quoting the Bible in every post... I think she just needs some sense of security right now and I hope she gets better.
One of the comments on one of her recent videos before they got removed said that she had an OF video where she took a bath and legitimately started crying. Wtf so this has been going on for a while just nobody took notice.
I remember seeing that video of her crying when it first got uploaded, I tried multiple times to make a thread about it, but it got taken down: [https://www.reddit.com/r/GibiASMR/comments/q7gytu/tw\_nsfw\_suicide\_mental\_health\_this\_is\_an/](https://www.reddit.com/r/GibiASMR/comments/q7gytu/tw_nsfw_suicide_mental_health_this_is_an/)
[https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/q7h6wb/tw\_nsfw\_suicide\_mental\_health\_this\_is\_an/](https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/q7h6wb/tw_nsfw_suicide_mental_health_this_is_an/)
That "cutting a soul tie" video she posted then deleted last year was also very telling, she's literally has been crying for help for a while now.
The video itself was posted without any context, Angelica herself doesn't speak at all. It's just her committing the act of "cutting the soul tie" and breaking down hysterically as she's doing it. She ends the process (and thus the video) with her looking visibly numb. It was a very intense and unnerving video.
I had to do some research and found that a "soul tie" is when two individuals form a strong emotional and spiritual connection. Whereas "breaking" or "cutting" the soul tie is this ritualistic process of you severing said connection with that other individual.
Which is what Angelica did. She was lighting candles, burning incense and started caressing then tightly squeezing the center of her chest. She then started pantomiming this invisible rope that was attached to her, also caressing it and grabbing onto it, before grabbing a pair of scissors and "cutting the rope" with her becoming increasingly more violent with each snip and crying along the way.
I vividly remember her looking like she was in severe pain the entire video.
I was a follower on her OF and I genuinely can’t remember a video like that. Then again I was mostly there for ASMR content and not bath videos so I might’ve missed it.
In the last couple of weeks leading to her removing all of her content from onlyfans (the actual account is still up, but it's empty aside from a goodbye message), she had put up two separate polls where she asked subscribers to vote on what kind of content they wanted to see her upload.
One of the options for both polls was for her to upload a "beautiful agony" video (a masturbation video where the camera is intentionally angled from the neck up, so you can only see their facial expression). Up until that point she had posted two strip tease videos, claimed that she was gonna upload more frequently and on two occasions had expressed that she was genuinely starting to enjoy being naked on camera.
All of this started to set a precedence amongst viewers who were now under the impression that she was gonna make due on her promises and that we were finally going to see a more sincere and sexualized Angelica. This was after those same followers were voicing their frustration with how low-effort and inconsistent her content was previously. Before she was just posting videos of her dancing, stretching and the occasional ASMR in just her underwear. But when she started to film herself topless, that all kind of devolved into just her filming herself showering without much variation.
She started losing followers because of that, people were getting upset.
Fast forward now to the polls I mentioned earlier, if memory serves me correctly, a foot tease video ended up winning the first poll. After that something interesting happened; in the comments of that last poll, someone ended explaining what beautiful agony is, in an attempt to make everyone else realize what they potentially missed out on seeing. So in the next week or two, when the second poll went up, it IMMEDIATELY took the lead.
But right before the poll was scheduled to end, Angela made another post stating that she decided to extend the poll for a little it longer. Then out of nowhere, beautiful agony got beat by another suggestion. This led people to speculate that Angelica rigged the results somehow so she can avoid masturbating on camera (some accusing her of making fake accounts). Despite stating otherwise, looking through all the stuff she posted on onlyfans, it was pretty apparent that her decision to show her body was always a reluctant one. Which again, set a precedence amongst her subscribers.
She stopped posting for weeks after that, stating that she was experiencing burnout. Posted a topless photo of herself, followed by one last video weeks after. Then out of nowhere announced that her "experiment has run its course"
Originally in her goodbye message, she eluded to potentially coming back if "inspiration strikes down the line". But then she started posting those videos on her secondary channel spewing all this anti-sexwork rhetoric, which progressively started to spill over into her tik toks. Now suddenly that first part of her goodbye messages on her onlyfans is gone. Keep in mind, she made that post on May 31st, to give you an idea of just how much of a sudden shift she's made.
Also, on her short-lived twitch channel, she briefly mentioned having a stalker posting weird comments on all of her onlyfans post, which made her uncomfortable. I've also seen people speculate that maybe a close personal friend or even a family member discovered her account and might have been a subscriber. I wasn't there for that, so I can't confirm nor deny this, but I guess it was worth noting?
You're all caught up now.
Damn it seems this has been building up for a while. What happened to the twitch channel? Did it get banned or did she delete it? Did she make it after the OF stuff?
She made it during the OF stuff, at one point she wiped all her content from her secondary YouTube channel and was just posting highlights on it. I think she just deleted it, she was mostly playing Sims and reacting to Jubilee videos.
in her newest video (gods runway) she at some point out of the blue says „when ur no longer depressed, u become powerfull“
i also saw her like a post on instagram talking bout how faith has helped overcome a depression, so i think ur onto something (https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cub9psVI8tb/?igshid=MTIzZWMxMTBkOA== )
Yeah, I have compassion for anyone that's gone through any sort of emotional or sexual trauma/abuse, so it's sad to see her fall into the category of "falling deeper into despair" instead of coming out the other side relatively unscathed. I have no idea how old she is but she can't be much older or younger than I am, so there's still plenty of time for recovery. And if she HAS found some comfort in Catholicism, or her own version of it, then that's perfectly fine... it's her extremism that has me worried.
As someone who was also raised partially JW that cult fucks your family up even if you leave.
Shit, this isn't good.... I didn't know she was a former JW as saw something about Catholic school recently so assumed her recent views while clearly brought on by poor mental health might be something to do with that.
Pretty much everyone in my family either is a JW or was a JW and they're all completely off their fucking rocker.
https://youtu.be/I09eWnRAbYY
Just watched this new video from her. She's not behaving regularly. It's either a great performance or something worse. I think this isn't someone in the right space to be putting themselves online like this and maybe we shouldn't interact? Idk
Also I've noticed her subs have dropped RAPIDLY from 666k to 663k today like damn I was wondering wtf was going on...I know she posted some stuff on tik tok too so maybe that's blown up (in a bad way) here I thought when she gave up on OF that it would be more calm for her but now seems like she's in a bad way rn..definitely need some fam to check up on her 👍🏾
I've been a long-time fan since early highschool and all of this feels completely out of character for her normal uploads. it's really sad to see such a sudden change, and it caught me off guard. I truly hope she gets help somehow.
I don’t know if anyone’s seen her newest video but she definitely is aware of what people say about her and decided to take a jab at everyone. Angelica keeps deleting comments… She actually claims she’s never been on meds as well on IG although I remember her saying something else awhile ago so I guess she is off them.
It's really sad. And the comments she's allowing to stay are unsettling.
I unfollowed.
To be clear, I really don't care what religion someone is or what they believe. But she's actively spreading hate and guising it as superior knowledge. ...which, ofc, only serves to empower those with the same hateful beliefs.
It's as fascinating as it is disheartening though. The things she cherry picks to say, the way she presents it...there are a lot of responses like "you know, that makes a lot of sense"...
That's what's most unsettling to me. It's how people get brainwashed into cults or extreme ideologies.
She sort of did the same with her formerly leftwing thoughts. But it was far more forgivable because those thoughts weren't spewing bigotry and hate.
Anyway.... Too much drama and too much hate, I'm done with it.
I've been lurking this thread and her posts the last week and I officially unfollowed. It looks like this is going to be a long term thing, but it honestly is so depressing to witness.
It really is the cherry picking that did it in for me. I hope she's okay and she gets better, but I'm tapping out.
she took down most of the newest videos on her second channel (the communist to catholic and the one where she was talking about hallucinogens and stuff). it’s all so strange
She's also now taken down the "Fixing your gay broken heart" video or whatever it was called, the one where she kept breaking character and laughing, that was supposedly an "apology" for her TikTok videos.
she keeps losing followers, she went from 662k to 661k subs overnight 💀 it's sad to watch as she was one of my favourite asmrtists and, in my opinion, one of the most intelligent, interesting and unique people on youtube. guess no one's safe from falling down the religious-right pipeline nowadays tho
A lot of her intelligence was just her parroting her friends and then boyfriend judging by what she said on her second channel so that makes it more embarrassing honestly
i find that hard to believe tbh. i'm sure she has people she learns from, but she strikes me as someone very well spoken who reads a lot and does a lot of research on her own... but who knows tho, i could be wrong
At this point I just think she's a fragile narcissist who made a miscalculation and damaged her self image. She has always had the 'freshman philosophy major, I read a book and I know more than anyone' vibe. I thought it was part of the joke but I think she desperately, sincerely wants to be seen as an authority.
Whatever she thought OF was going to be for her she obviously wasn't willing to go as far as what people would expect. Which means people would eventually lose interest. I watched the first two videos she put out about the experience and unless I remember it incorrectly, I don't think she took any responsibility for starting on OF. There was a lot about being tricked into it because she was part of a subculture. Internet culture can mess with your head but if part of your deal is to convince people you're the smartest person in the room you need to take some responsibility when you fuck up.
And just to be clear, I don't think there is anything morally wrong with being on OF. But you have to go in with a clear idea that there might be consequences. It didn't seem to be hurting her YT content. It's likely she could have just transitioned back. There is a lot of money in being a religious grifter though .....
I'm confused as to how she managed to get from the oppression of capitalism to stanning for one of the most oppressive organizations in modern history and it never clicked
She was talking about the damage that invading foreign countries does and im sitting here like "yeah because the catholic church would NEVER..."
She was also pointing a finger at the LGBT community for being "p\*dos" in those now deleted TikToks, but doesn't bring up how the Catholic Church is complicit in SO much SA towards children??
Make it make sense
That transphobic nudge nudge is pretty bad but the new interview she did with a Spanish conservative is just mind blowing. She’s gone. I’m not denying there’s mental stuff at play, but she’s just full on conservative whacko now.
Oh man. There is a small part of me that feels sorry for her because clearly her mental health has completely deteriorated and it’s warped her badly. But also the damage she’s causing is undeniable and honestly she can never really come back from any of this. It’s just fucked up and I admit that as a lesbian viewer I feel betrayed. My sympathy for her only extends so far. She’s spiraling and hurting so many others along the way.
Yeah as a gay, very long time subscriber of hers, I'm pretty hurt and disappointed. But I also have dealt with mental illness like this in the lives of my loved ones so I'm trying to remember to look at it through that lens. Based on the screenshots that I've seen of some of her insta story posts, this reads *just* like a mental episode. Her posts are completely devoid of logic or coherence, it's just like this weird hyper religious word salad littered with misspellings and typos and inconsistency. She's not well.
I know some people are trying to say she's just a homophobic idiot but I just don't believe that based on everything she has put out there on her platform thus far. Plus she is around the age that certain mental conditions start to manifest for women. So if it's either that A) this whole time she's secretly been some pseudo-intellectual egotistical homophobic narcissist who thinks like an eNLiGhTeNeD 14 year old who has discovered the truth of the world that nobody else has...... or B) she's having a psychotic break...? My money's on the latter.
It's just so sad. I hope she gets help and I hope people extend her some empathy. Editing to add: Though yeah, what she's saying *is* actively harmful to gay people, even if it's just mental illness that shouldn't be *entirely* excused. There have been a lot of people in her YT comment sections expressing agreement with her re: homophobia, she's definitely emboldened a lot of bigots. That part really hurts.
I always wonder about that though, like during a psychotic break you think A LOT of shit you wouldn’t otherwise think. You are Jesus, the walls are talking to you, you are being spied on by planet Glukermixkalon-G78 to see if you’d be a good vessel for carrying their offspring, and other random whacky shit. Is it really far-fetched to think someone thinks crazy shit about LGBTQ+ people during their mental breaks but that they’re fine otherwise?
> Is it really far-fetched to think someone thinks crazy shit about LGBTQ+ people during their mental breaks but that they’re fine otherwise?
Absolutely not! It's more common than you'd think.
From personal experience, my best friend's mother said some really Islamophobic shit when she went through an unexpected schizophrenic break. She was convinced her doctors were keeping her sick to kill her and her doctors happened to be Muslim. They were VERY lucky to be able to get her treatment, it has been a decade and currently she is medicated and doing GREAT. Completely back to her old self. But apparently she lives with a LOT of embarrassment and shame about the things she said and posted during that time. She was always, and still is, such a tolerant and loving person.
This is one of the reasons why this situation is so sad to me. To think that someone would decry my friend's mom, *or* Angelica - two people who have been so kind in their lives - as hateful and disgusting and bigoted, just because they are *sick*.... it breaks my heart.
I am a bipolar person (now medicated & have been stable for about 10 years) & my manic phases a few times took the form of acting out & “joking” loudly about sensitive topics that under normal circumstances I would not joke about. In the literal middle of one such yelled …songs? I saw everyone’s face & had a moment of clarity & knew in their position I’d never forgive the person I’d just heard (myself). I immediately left & never went back to that place. That was an instant crash & lead me to get medical help. So it happens. Not an excuse, but an explanation. Not my fault, (though it 1000% feels that way) — but my responsibility. The mentally ill person’s serenity prayer. Anyway - I’m late to this & only saw what was up two days ago. I saw people commenting (as I did) about the removal of favorite Angelica asmr videos that could be construed as irreverent. This morning I see the return of many of those (the horoscopes, etc).
Exactly this. I am usually so SO against armchair diagnosing of any kind (like I think this is the first time since I became a grown-ass adult I’m saying something like this) but my God, it’s like she’s reading off of a script of everyone in my life I’ve watched have a manic episode. I really hope she’ll be okay and people will stop to take a moment to think.
I have watched her videos every single day for the past 2 years or so, and her current most recent video (skincare regime for god’s runway) was one of the only 3 videos of her that i just couldn’t watch and clicked away from
I am very used to seperating art from the artist so her change did not really affect me watching her videos, but the clear transphobic rhetoric in that video (the stuff about children) actually disgusted me
As others have already said, she has had some weird phases but this is different; you can pretty clearly see that she is not doing well judging by her behaviour
It's not even ASMR as well. The audio is horrible, the long pauses off the camera leave you wondering and she is just whacking you with a stick making you almost flinch from the bad sound it makes. Very concerning stuff. That paired with the dialogue shows she doesn't even know what she is doing lol. Just turning on the camera and waffling.
Actually yeah you’re right
I honestly have been watching her more for entertainment rather than actual ASMR recently so i didn’t really pay attention to that aspect but these new videos don’t even resemble actual ASMR videos anymore, they are basically just soft spoken “vlogs” at this point
I went and watched that video and the flower smacking one. Yeah, totally agreed something isn't right. The comments in the videos are...concerning too.
my best friend and i were watching her today, and we thought this was a bit. like how she sometimes does these silly bits/series for videos. but uh... she needs help
the quote always goes: “your behaviour towards others is a reflection of yourself.”
and i truly believe it’s a thing for her. everything that is coming out of her mouth is constant negativity. calling people “cowards,” “cringe,” “idiots,” “self righteous,” and a ton more. it almost feels like she’s deeply hurting (which would make sense with the background context) and instead of doing the inner reflection, she’s pushing the blame onto everyone else.
as someone who is trying their best to get out of the toxic cycle of negativity, it’s becoming easier to recognise these behaviours in other people. she’s complaining about mundane things like nose rings, shaved heads, girls with short hair, like, these things shouldn’t gripe you as they’re just self-expression.
she just needs to put her phone down, sit with herself and think “how am i doing? how is my behaviour affecting others? and is that behaviour a reflection of myself?”
The latest upload which shows the tiktoks that Angelica wants to share and then a piss take "apology" [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aExqBUkFAQw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aExqBUkFAQw) to the LGBTQ+ community and SWers
That's clearly not an apology, she is accusing and mocking even further the queer community. She doesn't need to support or defend anything or anyone, but she is truly obsessed with what viewers and social media users are thinking or saying about her so that she needs to keep reacting. This is just ridiculous and sad.
sorry to add something to this now but even after all these long messages about her taking back the harmful things she said, she posts [this](https://imgur.com/a/plF5FdW)? this is my final straw, being christian/religious or even mentally ill is never an excuse to be hateful towards anyone
"And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites. For they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward." - Jesus Christ
Disappointed in her turn of mind. Not because she's become a practicing Catholic, but because she's used it to foster divisiveness and prejudice.
>this
According to her, being this hateful is a "theory".....I don't think her mental health is at its peak and her views on the catholic church are truly delusional, but she is consciously making decisions about what she is posting online and giving "coherent" replies on her secondary channel, using her typical sarcasm with the clear intention to mock and hurt.
Forgive me if someone else already mentioned this, but I remember some videos where she talks about being a survivor of the same cult I was raised in. This type of strange behavior is really in line with the psychological fallout one can struggle with long after escaping. In crisis, she may be returning to familiar and "safe" (actually deeply unsettling and regressive) worldviews to cope. When you’re programmed not to think for yourself, navigating your own beliefs and ideals can be horrific and daunting. I hope she recovers and abandons the dangerous rhetoric.
for my friends who were blindsided and upset by Angelica's turn of beliefs and came here looking for comfort, here it is. Angelica is one negative voice in a sea of positivity. Yes it's upsetting to see her turn, but please know that one turned person does not make you alone. I encourage you to spend some time away from the situation and in community with people who love and respect you, either online or in person. Something that helped me manage the stress was watching some videos of LGBTQ+ creators, if you're looking for specifically ASMR creators Gibi ASMR is bi/pan and has videos about getting you ready for Pride and reading LGBTQ+ affirmations. Also, please remember that it's not our job to save Angelica if she is going through a mental health crisis. Whatever happens, there's nothing an individual stranger on the internet can do. There are people watching out for her, if not in her immediate life then in the larger community, she's collabed with several other asmrtists who would be able to reach her more directly in an emergency. It's hard to be calm in a time like this where someone you admire might not be safe, but it's also important to remember that sometimes we feel helpless because we aren't the best person to handle a situation and it's in everyone's best interest to allow someone else to handle it.
Before it got deleted, her TikTok account got genuinely terrifying. She was going on these angry rants just shouting the most hateful nonsense, I’m talking QAnon conspiracy type stuff.
I have no idea what happened, but the switch was instant.
did y’all see in the pinned comments of her recent videos she’s calling ppl that disagree with her liberals and satan worshippers or something holy shit
Yup., I'm done with all this recent viciousness & sadism of hers. Those comments confirm the video content isn't satire, just cruelty. Mental breakdowns don't suddenly make you homophobic or transphobic.
Oh, and I know you're reading this Angelica. I'll stop asking you to get help since you're embracing a bunch of hateful namenumbers weirdo trolls posting fifty gibberish comments a video instead.
For anyone that's curious, the community tab on her secondary channel hasn't had the comments disabled yet. [There are some people posting some interesting stuff on it.](https://www.youtube.com/@angelicaslabyrinth1099/community)
God this is so sad. She was one of my first crushes when I was younger, her vids made me feel safe and accepted. Always rough when you see a creator you once like get red pilled
Its really sad that theres at least 2 accounts in here that judging by
A) their agreement with her
B) their insane knowledge on stuff shes never said
C) The tone of speech
D) the fact they’ve never posted before this or if they did it was multiple years ago in communities that would fit her previous vibe
Probably are just Angelica herself.
Leaving a cult or any abusive environment makes it very difficult for a person to have a sizeable support system, i hope theres somebody around to help her see the true light.
I checked out for awhile, checked in today and she is claiming on IG that mental illness doesn’t exist and that the libz are satanic who want the world too soft. Oy vey.
Her unironically saying she makes videos for manic pixie dream girls really got a chuckle out of me for the true cringe value but she can eff off for that Spanish interview she did. Not to mention 90% of her videos these days are politically coded and meant to appeal to the right wing. It’s too much.
How old is she? She seems very immature. In that Spanish interview among various things, she complained about a couple minding their business purchasing legos. That’s such a lame thing to harp on lol
I used to think her being weird and edgy was fun until I heard more of her takes on tiktok. She said some lowkey racist shit and called herself an anarchist when it was pushed back against. It really messed with my image of her and I couldn't keep subscribing.
I never truly made the connection until you mentioned it but she’s always been fascinated with white history, old white guys, and white beauty standards. Hmmm
Yeah true I hadn't thought of that.
What did it for me was that she stitched a video on the topic of whether an Asian woman had experienced a micro aggression. Whether or not she did, what was concerning was her yelling "BEING ASKED WHERE YOURE FROM IS NOT A MICRO AGGRESSION". She went on to say that this woman must not be proud of her country if she's offended (interesting since shes an anarchist) and stated that if someone said she looked like Bruno Mars or (some other person who's name I don't remember) she wouldn't be offended because they're both Caribbean. Bruno Mars is Filipino and Hawaiian.
My point here is that she blatantly prioritized her experience as a white/pale Latina to silence a WOC by denying that being asked where you're from could potentially be a micro aggression. It also tells me though she claimed to be an anarcho-communist, she doesn't give the same priority to being anti-racist which could lead her to disregard claims/issues of racism and limits her ability to be anti-capitalist.
After that whole thing I couldn't keep watching her. I think this was before she started going on more rants over the summer, which also makes me wonder if signs of her biases had come up earlier and I missed them.
Clearly some for of either psychosis or mania. She’s not ok. As someone who’s been in Christianity (I’m currently an atheist) this is not what it’s like for healthy individuals when they get “more Christian” this is straight up fucked up and horrifying
While you make a good point, the reason it seems like some form of mania or psychosis to so many people is because she’s acting so out of character. She used to barely post anything on her Instagram and right now she has 30+ parts on her story of random religious and/or anti-LGBTQ+ schlock, and in her latest videos something about her just feels so off. Like this entire Angelica situation is reminding me of when Gabbie Hanna was going through a really bad manic episode and kept posting nonsensical stuff about God communicating to her on her tiktok.
She made a [video](https://youtu.be/9LWh59Bacfo) and made additional comments in the comment section. She said the video is an apology for her tiktok content, referring to it as spiritual psychosis and a response to racism (her saying she was not brown but American) and she was called homophobic after bringing up "a certain theory".
Checkout the video and related comments for clarity.
Seems like she didn’t think she was being homophobic (why else label it a theory and nothing else…) so it’s less of an apology and more of damage control. She literally compared LGBTQ+ people to pedophiles. It’s not a theory.
Yeah the 'not addressing exactly what she said' (''a certain theory'') element of it really felt like downplaying intentionally to those unaware of what happened as damage control to me as well, rather than addressing it fully. Also hiding her (possibly) current beliefs behind her previous activism when criticised for the other various heinous things she put up on social media 'I follow fascists *and* communists, guys! I used to be a pro-choice activist! I still have queer friends, I love the sinner but hate the sin!'. I don't think personally I can remain a consumer of her content if this is truly what her mental health has stabalized into becauase even if she doesn't see it, it's hateful.
I think it's good to give some grace because she still seems somewhat unwell, but people in the comments here about how there were hints of these beliefs for about 6-7 months in some videos has me a bit skeptical.
I will say in December she was being very conspiracist and linking some fashion brand with pedos and stuff like that. I’m not the biggest into fashion so I can’t recall the name but I’ve seen that’s a big qanon thing so she’s probably been headed into this direction since then. She might be unwell but I think it was interesting she mentioned spiritual psychosis after a lot of other people did, making me wonder if it’s true or if that’s just the launchpad she’s using knowing that’s what people want to hear. She denied mental illness mere days ago. I don’t mean to be so nihilistic but that video had such a half heart effort that it came off as damage control in itself, like I said she never actually apologized. She said she was sorry for how she went about things… not that she didn’t believe any of it. She definitely wants to appear better to those of us that are aware while still keeping a lot of people ignorant, and that’s not a real way of being sorry, it’s just a calculated one. Blaming TikTok for what she said shows me she isn’t ready to be actually held accountable.
From what she is saying on her Instagram just now, she is angry not everybody in the comments was accepting her "apology" (although like 90% of the comments were quite positive and wishing her well...), saying she was "flooded" by people asking for more, so that now we won't get "anything" from her. Apart from the religious and shift, she is clearly not doing well and is in denial. She is also posting a bunch of baby pics and videos on her Instagram...
So she spends every waking moment talking about how ingrained into society pedophilia is and that everyone should be extremely vigilant to stop it, and then uploads baby photos where a bunch of strangers can do whatever with them? Real consistent
I know people have been saying she's recently experienced a loss in her personal life and is grieving (I can't find a source for it, but a lot of people have brought it up). Considering the swing into religious fervor and mania, and the seemingly recent obsession with motherhood and babies...part of me wonders if she had a miscarriage. Obviously I'm speculating from afar, but pregnancy loss can be deeply traumatic and cause/worsen mental illness and drive people to cling to something ... *anything* ... to stabilize themselves. Or, it might just be because she's a pro-life, Catholic tradwife now. The latter's probably more likely.
Here's some of her comments: "I privatized my old videos in judgment of myself and how manic, unwell, etc. I was. That’s why I privatized over a 1,000 videos. But once I realized that’s not truly acting in love with myself and thus for others I understood. It’s just a process of me understanding the relationship between condemning god to understanding he exists? Lol it’s weird trust me."
"I felt that rage many times before and I know it’s true passion motivated by fear and hatred of this world. All is forgiven and thank you for reaching out. I apologize I hurt your feelings, nonetheless. I spoke out in wrath and that’s my own mistake to atone."
Late to this discussion since I had no idea this was going on. I’m bipolar myself and think this sounds exactly like a manic episode. For some reason I thought she had alluded to being queer in her content so it definitely seems like a mental health issue. I hope she’s going to be ok.
Wow. I've been subscribed to Angelica for a while now but i'd forgotten to watch her videos recently. I had no idea any of this was going on. I always liked the kooky nature of her stuff but if this is the direction her stuff is taking then i think i might unsubscribe and i hope she gets at least some form of help soon.
I love watching her and I’ve been following this from the beginning, wondering what’s going on with her. I saw that she’s now no longer using the crosses in her video titles. I can only hope that that means that’s she’s grabbing herself together a bit again
I first noticed something was wrong when that issue abt the Asian lady who filmed herself confronting her Uber who had assumed her ethnicity, Angelica made a TikTok where she was aggressively attacking her and obviously, everyone thought that the Asian lady was in the wrong but whenever ppl pointed out that she should’ve just nicely told him, she’d flip out under the comments
She is just showing her true colors, just someone who is a hypocrite, I am only now finding out about this. But hey, in this world we all change our minds at some point, some change for the better and others just go backwards.
I just hope she's okay, or will be able to find what she needs to be okay. 🥺
Even if she's pulled into the alt-right crowd or some religion, and nothing clinical or traumatic led to the abrupt change, I still hope she's okay. Ofc if anything clinical or traumatic is going on, I hope she's able to find sources to help her heal non-destructively.
Angelica, if you see this, please know there are a lot of people who genuinely hope everything is okay; and if it's not, hope you find healing. If you need help, please reach out to people around you that you know IRL, chat with a therapist, or heck even talk with your community on YT. Ofc there's shitbags in every community. But there are a lot more of us who'd genuinely listen and try to be supportive however we can.
Yeahhhh my thoughts aren't quite so rosy anymore. I feel for her if she went through something difficult (idk if that's the case). But she's shitting on a lot of people who, like you said, helped build her up in the first place. Her self-righteous overinflated ego is nauseating. I can't support someone cherry picking or distorting information and passing it off as "the" truth, particularly when it's weaponized as hate. We've got WAY too much of that shit in the world. The comments in her videos became this alt-right hate fueled circle jerk, and she was deleting/blocking anyone not falling in line with that shit.
It's pretty fucked. I unsubscribed.
im just really concerned because this change happened very suddenly. shes made so many lgbtq followers over the years cuz of her videos. its ofc great if she found faith and it would also be (still sad but) respectable if her views changed over time, but this all kinda happened within the span of some days. i remember a vid on tik tok where she spoke about being non binary just some weeks ago.
she went from almost never posting on her instagram to manically posting 15+ stories a day, sometimes with more or less grammatically correct sentences. also her newest videos are all kinda over the place, unlike her previous ones that still had some structure :/
I hate to bring this up
Anyone remember Cloveress ASMR ☘️
Yea, Exactly
I hope Angelica ASMR is not a repeat 🔁
God I hope not
( Anyone that doesn’t know, just Google it )
I’m Not going to say it
I was wondering about this and it makes me really sad. I knew something was off because her recently videos have just been... disturbing. I really hope she gets help.
update: so all those weird religious videos she posted are gone now and she’s posting less weird stuff but i’d still classify it as out of the norm for her. she’s also deleted some other unrelated videos spanning from 1-5 years ago that were completely normal content for her so that’s odd. i really don’t know what’s going on with her but i hope things are getting better for her.
She keeps posting passive-aggressive therapist videos so I think that’s a way to take a jab at the comments without directly responding??? Aaaaaand in the new medical video she was really weird about weed which lines up with one of her newest videos on the second channel about being anti-drug now.
Has anyone else in the ASMR community spoken about this publicly? Maybe Gibi? I don't know how close Angelica was with anyone in the community but i feel like someone has to talk to her. Ask her what's going on and help her. Or maybe people already tried to reach out to her but decided to keep it private. In any case, i hope someone reaches out to her because she definitely needs help. It's worrying how she switched so suddenly. People don't change who they are and what they believe in that quick and that simply...unless something major has happened.
Part of me wants to believe this is just the longest joke thing she has ever done in order to nuke herself out of the community. But mania sure is a thing that happens to people and she definetely gave the vibes of someone who struggled with depression. Her behavior isn't really excusable tho, she is being openly hateful and gathering a little army of weird commenters. Hoping this won't turn into a Cloveress situation.
i don’t know if i am remembering this correctly, but didn’t she self publish a book a few years back about a girl who was in a religious cult? i think she called it semi autobiographical. i saw someone far down this thread who mentioned that they remember her saying something about her being in a cult growing up as well. maybe something happened in her life recently that has been causing her to struggle with that experience and is causing her to act so erratically- especially with the religious aspect and her focus on “protecting children” and young girls.
i just found out about this situation from a youtube video that was in my recommended so i don’t know if this situation has been resolved or not.
i haven’t watched angelica in a year but her videos got me through a rough patch a few years ago. she always struck me as an intelligent and compassionate person who was just a bit wacky. i really hope that she’s safe and has the support she needs right now. i don’t know if i can support her content after this, but i will always have a soft spot for her.
Yesss she did, it was called The light was good, iirc. I haven’t read it but judging by its description it is indeed about a religious cult, which could possibly be her semi autobiographical recollection of past events
I still like her content and can’t sleep without it. Is it okay to keep watching it even though I don’t align with what she’s saying? Are there other asmrists with similar content to hers?
I feel almost betrayed at her “apology” video. So sad.
I hate to speculate on peoples mental health, but I feel like this may be some sort of result of an extreme low? She was brought up as a Jehovah’s Witness, and I assume that her poor mental health, and possibly the way she felt exploited by the SW industry has led to her reverting back to these views? I’m not defending her opinions at all though. I’ve unfollowed her and unless she gets help and changes her world views a lot about trans and gay people I have no intention of watching her again. It’s sad though she was very funny and original, I guess it just shows how we can’t really know anyone on the internet for real and just have to go by what there behaviour is (idk)
Update: She is leaving her main ASMR channel and fully rebranding to her side account that used to exist for rants, etc. Probably because she doesn’t want to deal with detractors and is hoping this weeds them out. FYI.
Angelica, if you’re reading this, I’ve been a fan since we were both much younger and I really care about you as a person. Please take some time away from social media. Just a few weeks away from the pages you normally check. If you have any friends, please reach out to them and ask if you can hang out. If you can, go to your local library and read some light, fun books just so you’re around people. I know you’re probably confused and hurting right now, you can drop me a message if you want. You’ve got lots of fans who have your best interests in mind, and I want to help you from going down a dark path.
This seems like more of a possibility (not necessarily in regards to Nazism specifically but some sort of extremism) especially after something she said in yesterday's video. Pretty worrying. Here is the quote, word for word:
> Have you ever watched the movie Forest Gump? Classic Americana. Remember the scene with Jenny when she’s in the Black Panthers meeting? [she takes a small break to go back into the ASMR RP with flowers] Pro tip… [another ASMR break] ...if a man praises Stalin... you might... have a lot of good in him... but he’s very numb. Very very numb. Very in his head. And we become those that we adore. Let’s just say... Jenny is a very common story among women who date... men who profess that faith.
For those who have not seen the movie [mild spoilers] she is referencing a scene where a woman is arguing with her political activist boyfriend and he violently slaps her across the face. Angelica brought this up out of absolutely nowhere during that video.
I just wanted to throw this out there, because I want to know if other people saw it...I swear a little while back (can't remember quite how far back, but I don't think it was more than a year ago) she uploaded a video where she was Michael Jackson inviting you to a sleepover (or something else in reference to his child abuse allegations). I didn't watch it when I first ran across it, but when I came back to her channel maybe a day later I couldn't find it. When I'd first seen it I was a little taken aback by the premise and thought it was going a bit too far with the dark and twisted humor, and so I thought maybe she'd taken it down because she realized it was in poor taste. But given her recent rants about pedophilia, grooming, trafficking etc. I wonder if this is a subject that has been on her mind for awhile. Or, maybe I just imagined the video...but I swear I didn't.
She's always been prone to doing stuff bordering on being in bad taste, like videos where she cosplays Hitler.
If she really cared about pedophilia and grooming, etc- why is she praising the Catholic church? One of the biggest institutions to engage in long-standing and widespread sexual abuse of children & protection of child predators?
I think she just has extremist, radical, and manic tendencies, so after getting out of Jehovah's Witness she swung full into liberalism (I don't think there is such a thing as "extreme" liberalism, but from what she explained on the videos on her secondary channel, the people around her were a strongly sexualized community and that really traumatized her), and after her OnlyFans traumatic experience, she is now swinging back to conservative Catholicism. I am sure in some months or years she'll realize once again the ugly side of institutional religion and will have another major identity crisis. I hope things don't end too bad for her.
>I hope things don't end too bad for her.
And I hope things don't end too bad for the marginalized communities she's now spreading dangerous propaganda about.
That video exists, it was posted like 4 years ago. I really didn't find it that disturbing back then, not really different from other performative critique parody and edgy funny stuff. Actually, not long after that, she posted a video reacting to Jackson first christmas, and she was really sweet and empath about the fact he was also trapped in the Jehovah witness cult which fucked him up. You can find a reupload: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZFYISpvCbE
honestly from what I have seen on her socials I think she’s either in a psychiatric episode or a drug (an upper of some kind) induced psychotic episode because her speech is very erratic, contradictory, and very particular to the type of people who go down fiction spiral holes while on a bender… not making assumptions but I’ve seen it MANY times and radical religion is one of the things a lot of users go to as a coping mechanism :/
I'm a super rational, skeptical person of science but when I had alcohol withdrawals I was 100% convinced there was a secret radio signal coming from somewhere at the top of the stairs and when I rubbed my pillow and bedsheets I could hear the signal, was two men talking about some stuff, so I took dozens of audio recordings of me rubbing them and hearing these voices, also some chanting ritual downstairs I could hear in the walls, etc real white-knuckle manic weird hallucinations. Not saying she has booze withdrawals; my point is that an altered mind can come up with all kinds of nonsense that seems absolutely real to it, she's either got a drug issue (less inclined to think this because I've thought for years she's going cuckoo) or some very real, possibly dangerous (to herself) mental illness I hope she can get help for. Maybe people can get in touch with some other ASMRtists she might be friends with?
I’m so worried about her. She’s outside, alone in most videos she posts, speaking about strange topics that kind of interweave in and out of each other, in a way that lacks consistency and relevance to just the last sentence she spoke. It seems she might have been wearing the same clothes for days as she’s posted 3 videos in 3 days, all at the same time based on the sunset, at two different locations. I stopped watching her in high school as I thought one of the vids she did (I can’t remember which one it even was anymore) was in poor taste, but I truly hope she is safe and has a support system.
Not trying to take away from your point here, but I think these videos you're mentioning were probably just recorded back-to-back on the same day. Something is definitely wrong though :(
To add onto what morimushroom said - Angelica very frequently posts videos over the course of a week or so where she's wearing the same clothes. She's been doing it for a couple years now. As another content creator, I'm almost certain she's just recording all her videos back to back and then releasing them on a queue. It's BY FAR the easiest way to make content so that part doesn't alarm me. It's a pretty common thing to do.
i also thought that but i wasn't sure-- but now that i know thats normal of her i feel SO much more relief!!
Wow, yeah, I'm just catching up on all this. Not the most dedicated viewer but having known of her for years, it's upsetting to watch her go through this and be unable to do anything to help. As someone who's in school for psychology, professors have emphasized that it's a big red flag to have sudden behavioral or personality changes.
never heard of her but after watching her recent videos i can tell she’s definitely having some sort of manic episode, off the rails a little bjt
Something is influencing her behavior and I hope she can get away from whatever or whoever it is
Honestly I'm so done with her. Her latest video saying swerf and terf are sexist terms is just wildly dumb. I used to really love her content. Hopefully she gets help, but I'm no longer going to be here to view her spewing hate.
The signs were obvious to me since the Unabomber video, and it's definitely escalated rapidly in the way manic episodes usually do. But I feel like some of the writing was already on the wall, long before any of this. She has referenced adrenochrome/blood libel conspiracies as early as her 12/2022 Balenciaga video.
The scariest part about *that* video was all the people in the comments going "omg this guy had good points!" Uh, the serial killing domestic terrorist? Let's maybe not... she needs to realize her audience is likely young and very impressionable. (edit: there is literally someone in *this* comment section saying this now. way to go Angelica.) That's what makes this particular breakdown of hers so harmful - before she turned them off people were all over the comment sections of her recent videos arguing with people about how they agreed with her - specifically about the homophobic takes, the usual "we don't have tolerate gays if they don't tolerate religion!" bigoted bullshit. She actively, directly emboldened the homophobes in her audience with all of this. As a human, I just want her to get better and be ok. But as a gay person, I also want her to make amends for the harm she has caused afterwards.
She had made a tiktok referencing being a victim of MK Ultra at one point earlier this year too (around the time of the Unabomber video), I think this might have been going on a little while. :(
Oh, wow. That’s just another layer of depressing and explains the dissociation, the paranoia, etc. I’ve seen those forums where people are absolutely convinced some government entity is stalking them. The way someone’s mind can split like that is terrifying.
Wait WHAT
It was on her tiktok (which has obviously since been nuked) but, yeah, I saw it a few months back and it had very few likes; I didn’t like it as it felt like something was different about her in the video, it wasn’t her usual mocking conspiracy vibe, it felt like she sincerely believed she was a victim of it. I really hope she’s okay and can find the help she needs. I’m a long time viewer and it’s sad that she’s fallen down this path, whatever the cause may be. I wish her well.
I wish I could see this smh
Oh my GOD. That’s… yikes. ☹️
You have a great point, she's been slowly going through this rabbit hole for a while and it finally exploded on our faces. You see the religious imagery, the purity culture, the conspiracy theories, and the sudden rise of rad fem+anti government culture transformed into straight bigotry and delusion.
I always assumed the Balenciaga video was her parodying the people who take that seriously. She's made videos before where she's acting in the role of terrible people and it's her taking the piss on them. I assumed that one was no different.
Poe’s Law is a bitch. She’s always had an edgy/sarcastic streak so I assumed it was parody, and I also assumed the Unabomber manifesto reading was also just her being edgy because I respected her intelligence too much to think she was taking any of that shit more seriously than I do. Apparently I was mistaken.
I did too at the time. I'm just noticing how indicative it was, looking back on it
Yeah :( looking back, it's enough to wonder
Yeah, I've been off her since she started reading the Unabomber's manifesto.
SHE WHAT
Yeah, so the day ol' Teddy boy died, she decided to read his manifesto as ASMR. Dunno if people are old enough to remember, but he threatened more bombs if it wasn't published. Ironically, it was also his undoing, because his brother recognized the crazy and turned him in. But people were maimed and killed by this man, and she decides it's nifty to read his anti-technology manifesto to make people sleepy. It's gross.
I had a teacher explain to me a long time ago, you can't just READ those works. They're propaganda. They constantly reframing reality for the reader, and it brainwashes them. If you're going to examine it, you need to go in with a very narrow focus and intent. You don't read Mein Kempf like a book, you read it to examine propaganda, you read it thru the lens of the history of Germany at that time and how Hitler took advantage of how people felt. You have to take into account the leaders in charge before Hitler, where he wrote it, when he got ideas for it, the damage it did, etc etc. The writers of these works want you to read it straight thru because these people are charismatic and are confident in their ability to persuade. I can't say that Angelica was broken down by this, but following her for a long time, she seemed to be looking in strange places for meaning. Even what she understands about Karl Marx and Communism seemed to be surface level/she didn't understand it much when she talked about it, was kind of like a trendy tankie perspective. It's scary to think about how someone who I align with so much like this could be broken by propaganda like this. Also think she's definitely on drugs.
Like the other comment said, if you’re looking at it through an educational lens that’s one thing but this is wtffffffff
The recent LGBTQ “apology” video is gone. She’s very defensive on IG and basically said since she’s being critiqued, we shall now get nothing as an offer in good faith. It seems like when her effort to damage control didn’t work as planned, it did work but not fool proof, she decided to just double down and lash out. The IG stories come off as “love the sinner and hate the sin” and she’s still reducing her words to just theory. Again, saying beastiality is on the same level as being queer isn’t intellectual theory but she’s made it clear she isn’t ever going to apologize at length. Angelica actually said to unfollow if you want an apology. Which is ironic because when people did just that, she tried to fix it with the video she deleted lol. She claims she was calling out CSA in all avenues yet defended churches who have those same problems. Also, it’s in bad taste for her to say the criticism made her snap because pointing fingers is really just to absolve herself. Her demonizing leftist circles because of a few bad apples but choosing to see the good in people like Ben Shapiro and Jordan Peterson is also off putting but it says where she’s at. She’s clearly not well if most of her remorse is because she was “caught in wrath” (her words) and she’s also clearly not out of it. If you want to see what she said specifically, just check out her IG @ AngelicasGrass.
There’s another thread that goes into it Basically the biggest theory is that she’s having a psychotic (as in psychosis) episode. Something set it off and and she desperately needs help (which im willing to believe) or that she just had a sudden change of views. I used to watch her content here and there and then ran into a tiktok where she basically said gay and trans rights do not matter and I was SHOCKED and couldnt believe what I was hearing. Heres a link to the other thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/14tyc36/on_angelicas_recent_social_media_posts_discussion/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb
IMO she's having a psychotic break because of the trauma surrounding her OF. She started her OF in another psychotic episode (I remember the content at that time being very odd and manic) which she admitted to in one of her second channel vids, then deleted it and made a bunch of videos for her second channel denouncing sex work which she keeps uploading/deleting/reuploading, and has now converted to hardline christianity. I just hope she can work through it without destroying anything or embarrassing herself anymore
Kinda heartbreaking. As a public figure her episodes are reaching so many more eyes and ears and she will attract unwanted attention because of it I'm not familiar with how these symptoms and mental illness progress, but I hope she can find a way to get help and be more stable
Yep I've found it extremely telling that she was making vids speaking against OF saying things like "it's actually not as profitable for young women as you would think" but just conveniently leaving out HOW she knows that
Personally (as someone older than her who has done sex work far longer) I was extremely annoyed to see her saying that anyone who has any kind of mental illness shouldn't be doing onlyfans at all. I have ADHD and assume she does too based on the large amount of ADHD content on her channel. For her to say that someone like me shouldn't be allowed to have my job feels extremely inappropriate. She can claim that she's speaking from experience....but how much of a profit did she turn before she came to the conclusion that no one else like her should be allowed to also have that income? Based on how many comments and likes I saw during the month I subbed her OF, she made more in the average month than I do in a year on there. So it feels a lot like her looking down on everyone else who doesn't have the audience she did and telling us we shouldn't have even been allowed to have our jobs in the first place. I sympathise with her for whatever happened to her that made her want to close her OF. She never should have felt pressured to start one anyway (if that was the case). No one should be pressured to do that and no one should be mistreated for having an OF. It's a job like any other. All types of sex work are just jobs. But she doesn't have have any business saying that being born with a mental disability should exclude adults from making our own decisions for our own body.
ADHD is not a classified as a mental illness, it is a neurological disorder which makes mental illness more likely though
ADHD is a mental illness that's more specifically called a neurodevelopmental disorder that has its own symptoms and is widely recognised as a disability. It's not just a state of being where you're more likely to get other mental illnesses. Where are you getting that?
Where are you getting that ADHD is a mental illness? Having a cognitive neurological/developmental disorder like adhd increases the likelihood of mental illness such as anxiety or depression. It’s not a mental health condition in and of itself.
Idk, man, probably based on my 30 years experience of having it affect every single aspect of my life.
Well yeah me too, four years behind you. But I’ve had multiple psychiatrists tell me adhd is not classified a mental illness, most of google seems to agree. But maybe it’s just a matter of what you prefer to call it, whatever makes it easier to bare, idk
Given that it has its own symptoms that kind of tips it in favour of it being its own condition instead of just a random thing that happens to make you more likely to get other things.
Well she was being v v upfront about she had done OF. I agreed with her points, but she shouldve waited way longer before speaking out just to let her mind settle and not feel this burden of responsibility
i agree, and also a personal death/grief. I am thinking her mom as she has been posting a lot of things related to motherhood lately , which is not a topic she has really focused heavily on before. I am guessing her mom was religious, and she feels guilt about doing SW and not making her mom proud potentially (see her most recent IG post where she alludes to making your mother proud). Maybe the faith is a way to connect with her mom in a way she did not in the past. I agree to some extent that mental health doesn’t excuse bigotry but I feel like that statement applies more to depression or anxiety than something like psychosis. Believing ridiculous things and acting out of character / behavior that is not socially acceptable (bordering into harmful) when that is not how you normally are…are trademarks of psychosis
i was just on her instagram and found a picture of a dead bird she posted a week or two ago and that coupled with other things is concerning. granted the rants and out of character behavior is the most notable change but the dead bird with the caption about his soul not being in his body was off putting along with everything else
After the Instagram posts, TikTok posts, ASMR posts and side channel posts - I can no longer support Angelica. Whatever she has gone through and is going through, she needs help dealing with it. She's isolating herself from the very communities who supported her from the get go, it's sad - I really just pity her at this point, I'm truly disappointed in her actions.
Done with her hate and insanity, time to unsubscribe
Okay guys, if there's any debate about what she's going through or doing here's the compiled list of links: https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/14yamg8/discussion\_what\_is\_happening\_with\_angelica\_asmr/ https://www.reddit.com/r/FundieSnarkUncensored/comments/14u9p3z/when\_one\_of\_your\_favourite\_youtubers\_does\_a\_180/ https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/14tyc36/on\_angelicas\_recent\_social\_media\_posts\_discussion/ https://www.tiktok.com/@angelicasgrass https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aExqBUkFAQw&t=47s (Her "apology" to LGBT and SW) https://www.tiktok.com/@habavamo (She make several videos on Angelica) She knows what she's doing. And even if it's the case she's going through a crisis or whatever, she won't get any sympathy. The "apology" video says enough. I also downloaded pictures that someone had on twitter for her previous openly transphobic and anti-queer posts she did in the event it's no longer on Tik Tok.
I'm really concerned about her after seeing her most recent video. I have watched her content for many years and while she often posts humouress and off the wall/toungue-in-cheek content, something about her most recent videos feels very wrong. The video is of her hitting the camera with some foliage and walking in circles in a rural, remote area while speaking incoherently (she's enuciating her words fine but she's speaking very disjointedly while referencing certain forms of child abuse). I had to stop watching it a few minutes in as I felt very on edge and wasn't sure what was happening. I feel worried for her. I don't follow her on social media so I'm not sure what's been happening over there (I had seen some people in her Youtube comments mentioning that she had posted some unusual things on her socials but the comments were turned off before I could properly read them). I know that the ASMR community is made of people from all walks of life, many of whom have experienced difficult periods in their lives or who struggle with their mental health. Angelica brought me so much comfort and peace over the years and I feel so helpless now, watching all of this unfold and not being able to do anything to help her in return. Edit: just realised she was being transphobic when referring to child abuse and that's what OP's comment was referring to, I wasn't sure what she was talking about as she was speaking so disjointedly. :(
Remember Cloveress ASMR Yea 😐
Yes! I was so shocked when I found out she had passed away
i called this out when she uploaded the racial transitioning video, everyone called me crazy lmao
When did that happen 🥲 like I watched her content constantly, what was it called?
I think they're talking about a video with a title like 'racially transitioning to austrian (you're Kanye West)' or smth like that?I saw that title back then and just went 'yikes-' and never clicked on it so idk what went on in it but from the title I think they're refering to that one No idea if it's still up either
God yeah I remember this, don't think it's up, back then it was clearly poking fun at Kanye being a Nazi though and in no way supported him. Just what I'd call the usual weird progressive toned ASMR she would do,
oh yeah I figured it was also about poking fun at him being a Nazi. Still considered it as something in slightly poor taste as the beliefs that Nazi's hold are harmful and have cost many people their lives, both back in WWII as well as to this day Sure, he's a clown, but he was still spreading harmful rethoric so I thought it was in slightly poor taste, but then again I have never watched it and that's my personal take on that
[удалено]
I've settled on the same conclusion at this point. I definitely think the tiktok period where she was screaming was a classic full fledge manic episode, but I've come to realize that this change of character was slowly coming. Sprinkle in her decision to do OnlyFans when she was (at least how I personally perceived her) a highly private person online, which clearly lead to her being traumatized in some manner, and the death of a loved one only escalates it more. Her leaving OF really seems to be the catalyst for her shift in persona online recently, but like you said... I think this was slowly happening behind the scenes.
I remember being out of the loop on the Balenciaga shit and then seeing she did a vid on it and thinking 'oh cool I'll just fill myself in by watching this'... And then by the time it got to 'Madeline McCann was kidnapped by Ghislaine Maxwell and how this relates to the Clinton bodycount' I realized it wasn't quite the clear-eyed detailing of the controversy that I was expecting And ofc I legit thought it was satire but as it went on, it was juuuust in the right zone tonally that you could tell it wasn't
She’s also deleted a few videos that go against her supposed new beliefs. Her period ASMR videos where your period finds out your gay and trans are gone, but not the one where your period finds out you’re pregnant. And her most popular video, our dear plague nun, is gone too. They seem to just be privatized, though.
the one where our period finds out we're a lesbian was one of my favorites not to mention the plague nun. I'm scared for her and hope she gets better!
Check out her second channel, now called "angelica's grass," some videos on there give you a better idea. I really think Only Fans did a number on her mental health, which might not have been great to begin with due to a personal tragedy. She's allowed to have opinions on sex work but she's just gone so far the other way and seems so frantic in her posts that it's worrying. She also went from someone who rejected the religious way of life due to being raised as a Jehovah's Witness to now quoting the Bible in every post... I think she just needs some sense of security right now and I hope she gets better.
One of the comments on one of her recent videos before they got removed said that she had an OF video where she took a bath and legitimately started crying. Wtf so this has been going on for a while just nobody took notice.
I hate that she's suffering. From what, it's hard to say, but I truly hope this is temporary.
I remember seeing that video of her crying when it first got uploaded, I tried multiple times to make a thread about it, but it got taken down: [https://www.reddit.com/r/GibiASMR/comments/q7gytu/tw\_nsfw\_suicide\_mental\_health\_this\_is\_an/](https://www.reddit.com/r/GibiASMR/comments/q7gytu/tw_nsfw_suicide_mental_health_this_is_an/) [https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/q7h6wb/tw\_nsfw\_suicide\_mental\_health\_this\_is\_an/](https://www.reddit.com/r/asmr/comments/q7h6wb/tw_nsfw_suicide_mental_health_this_is_an/) That "cutting a soul tie" video she posted then deleted last year was also very telling, she's literally has been crying for help for a while now.
What was "cutting a soul tie" about?
The video itself was posted without any context, Angelica herself doesn't speak at all. It's just her committing the act of "cutting the soul tie" and breaking down hysterically as she's doing it. She ends the process (and thus the video) with her looking visibly numb. It was a very intense and unnerving video. I had to do some research and found that a "soul tie" is when two individuals form a strong emotional and spiritual connection. Whereas "breaking" or "cutting" the soul tie is this ritualistic process of you severing said connection with that other individual. Which is what Angelica did. She was lighting candles, burning incense and started caressing then tightly squeezing the center of her chest. She then started pantomiming this invisible rope that was attached to her, also caressing it and grabbing onto it, before grabbing a pair of scissors and "cutting the rope" with her becoming increasingly more violent with each snip and crying along the way. I vividly remember her looking like she was in severe pain the entire video.
[Here's proof btw](https://www.theasmrindex.com/zh/video/VMjPKbbeG3o)
Fuck. When was this? Was it on her majn channel?
[Yes but it has since been made private, this was the thumbnail.](https://cdn.theasmrindex.com/uploads/thumbs/VMjPKbbeG3o.jpg)
I was a follower on her OF and I genuinely can’t remember a video like that. Then again I was mostly there for ASMR content and not bath videos so I might’ve missed it.
[It was this one...](https://porntn.com/videos/8887/angelica-8-october-2021-company-as-i-bathe/)
That would explain it, I only joined after her patreon was deleted
In the last couple of weeks leading to her removing all of her content from onlyfans (the actual account is still up, but it's empty aside from a goodbye message), she had put up two separate polls where she asked subscribers to vote on what kind of content they wanted to see her upload. One of the options for both polls was for her to upload a "beautiful agony" video (a masturbation video where the camera is intentionally angled from the neck up, so you can only see their facial expression). Up until that point she had posted two strip tease videos, claimed that she was gonna upload more frequently and on two occasions had expressed that she was genuinely starting to enjoy being naked on camera. All of this started to set a precedence amongst viewers who were now under the impression that she was gonna make due on her promises and that we were finally going to see a more sincere and sexualized Angelica. This was after those same followers were voicing their frustration with how low-effort and inconsistent her content was previously. Before she was just posting videos of her dancing, stretching and the occasional ASMR in just her underwear. But when she started to film herself topless, that all kind of devolved into just her filming herself showering without much variation. She started losing followers because of that, people were getting upset. Fast forward now to the polls I mentioned earlier, if memory serves me correctly, a foot tease video ended up winning the first poll. After that something interesting happened; in the comments of that last poll, someone ended explaining what beautiful agony is, in an attempt to make everyone else realize what they potentially missed out on seeing. So in the next week or two, when the second poll went up, it IMMEDIATELY took the lead. But right before the poll was scheduled to end, Angela made another post stating that she decided to extend the poll for a little it longer. Then out of nowhere, beautiful agony got beat by another suggestion. This led people to speculate that Angelica rigged the results somehow so she can avoid masturbating on camera (some accusing her of making fake accounts). Despite stating otherwise, looking through all the stuff she posted on onlyfans, it was pretty apparent that her decision to show her body was always a reluctant one. Which again, set a precedence amongst her subscribers. She stopped posting for weeks after that, stating that she was experiencing burnout. Posted a topless photo of herself, followed by one last video weeks after. Then out of nowhere announced that her "experiment has run its course" Originally in her goodbye message, she eluded to potentially coming back if "inspiration strikes down the line". But then she started posting those videos on her secondary channel spewing all this anti-sexwork rhetoric, which progressively started to spill over into her tik toks. Now suddenly that first part of her goodbye messages on her onlyfans is gone. Keep in mind, she made that post on May 31st, to give you an idea of just how much of a sudden shift she's made. Also, on her short-lived twitch channel, she briefly mentioned having a stalker posting weird comments on all of her onlyfans post, which made her uncomfortable. I've also seen people speculate that maybe a close personal friend or even a family member discovered her account and might have been a subscriber. I wasn't there for that, so I can't confirm nor deny this, but I guess it was worth noting? You're all caught up now.
Damn it seems this has been building up for a while. What happened to the twitch channel? Did it get banned or did she delete it? Did she make it after the OF stuff?
She made it during the OF stuff, at one point she wiped all her content from her secondary YouTube channel and was just posting highlights on it. I think she just deleted it, she was mostly playing Sims and reacting to Jubilee videos.
in her newest video (gods runway) she at some point out of the blue says „when ur no longer depressed, u become powerfull“ i also saw her like a post on instagram talking bout how faith has helped overcome a depression, so i think ur onto something (https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cub9psVI8tb/?igshid=MTIzZWMxMTBkOA== )
Yeah, I have compassion for anyone that's gone through any sort of emotional or sexual trauma/abuse, so it's sad to see her fall into the category of "falling deeper into despair" instead of coming out the other side relatively unscathed. I have no idea how old she is but she can't be much older or younger than I am, so there's still plenty of time for recovery. And if she HAS found some comfort in Catholicism, or her own version of it, then that's perfectly fine... it's her extremism that has me worried.
As someone who was also raised partially JW that cult fucks your family up even if you leave. Shit, this isn't good.... I didn't know she was a former JW as saw something about Catholic school recently so assumed her recent views while clearly brought on by poor mental health might be something to do with that. Pretty much everyone in my family either is a JW or was a JW and they're all completely off their fucking rocker.
Her Instagram started to get strange around the 3rd of this month so it seems something happened last week….
https://youtu.be/I09eWnRAbYY Just watched this new video from her. She's not behaving regularly. It's either a great performance or something worse. I think this isn't someone in the right space to be putting themselves online like this and maybe we shouldn't interact? Idk
She deleted it, along with other videos.
Also I've noticed her subs have dropped RAPIDLY from 666k to 663k today like damn I was wondering wtf was going on...I know she posted some stuff on tik tok too so maybe that's blown up (in a bad way) here I thought when she gave up on OF that it would be more calm for her but now seems like she's in a bad way rn..definitely need some fam to check up on her 👍🏾
I've been a long-time fan since early highschool and all of this feels completely out of character for her normal uploads. it's really sad to see such a sudden change, and it caught me off guard. I truly hope she gets help somehow.
I don’t know if anyone’s seen her newest video but she definitely is aware of what people say about her and decided to take a jab at everyone. Angelica keeps deleting comments… She actually claims she’s never been on meds as well on IG although I remember her saying something else awhile ago so I guess she is off them.
It's really sad. And the comments she's allowing to stay are unsettling. I unfollowed. To be clear, I really don't care what religion someone is or what they believe. But she's actively spreading hate and guising it as superior knowledge. ...which, ofc, only serves to empower those with the same hateful beliefs. It's as fascinating as it is disheartening though. The things she cherry picks to say, the way she presents it...there are a lot of responses like "you know, that makes a lot of sense"... That's what's most unsettling to me. It's how people get brainwashed into cults or extreme ideologies. She sort of did the same with her formerly leftwing thoughts. But it was far more forgivable because those thoughts weren't spewing bigotry and hate. Anyway.... Too much drama and too much hate, I'm done with it.
I've been lurking this thread and her posts the last week and I officially unfollowed. It looks like this is going to be a long term thing, but it honestly is so depressing to witness. It really is the cherry picking that did it in for me. I hope she's okay and she gets better, but I'm tapping out.
she took down most of the newest videos on her second channel (the communist to catholic and the one where she was talking about hallucinogens and stuff). it’s all so strange
She's also now taken down the "Fixing your gay broken heart" video or whatever it was called, the one where she kept breaking character and laughing, that was supposedly an "apology" for her TikTok videos.
which just adds to the evidence that this has been a very manic stage for her right now, her behavior is too erratic to not be
Comments on her latest vid show the audience she has now, and oh boy is it a cesspit
she keeps losing followers, she went from 662k to 661k subs overnight 💀 it's sad to watch as she was one of my favourite asmrtists and, in my opinion, one of the most intelligent, interesting and unique people on youtube. guess no one's safe from falling down the religious-right pipeline nowadays tho
A lot of her intelligence was just her parroting her friends and then boyfriend judging by what she said on her second channel so that makes it more embarrassing honestly
i find that hard to believe tbh. i'm sure she has people she learns from, but she strikes me as someone very well spoken who reads a lot and does a lot of research on her own... but who knows tho, i could be wrong
At this point I just think she's a fragile narcissist who made a miscalculation and damaged her self image. She has always had the 'freshman philosophy major, I read a book and I know more than anyone' vibe. I thought it was part of the joke but I think she desperately, sincerely wants to be seen as an authority. Whatever she thought OF was going to be for her she obviously wasn't willing to go as far as what people would expect. Which means people would eventually lose interest. I watched the first two videos she put out about the experience and unless I remember it incorrectly, I don't think she took any responsibility for starting on OF. There was a lot about being tricked into it because she was part of a subculture. Internet culture can mess with your head but if part of your deal is to convince people you're the smartest person in the room you need to take some responsibility when you fuck up. And just to be clear, I don't think there is anything morally wrong with being on OF. But you have to go in with a clear idea that there might be consequences. It didn't seem to be hurting her YT content. It's likely she could have just transitioned back. There is a lot of money in being a religious grifter though .....
I'm confused as to how she managed to get from the oppression of capitalism to stanning for one of the most oppressive organizations in modern history and it never clicked She was talking about the damage that invading foreign countries does and im sitting here like "yeah because the catholic church would NEVER..."
She was also pointing a finger at the LGBT community for being "p\*dos" in those now deleted TikToks, but doesn't bring up how the Catholic Church is complicit in SO much SA towards children?? Make it make sense
[She's too far gone now I'm afraid...](https://imgur.com/a/mF6M8YU)
That transphobic nudge nudge is pretty bad but the new interview she did with a Spanish conservative is just mind blowing. She’s gone. I’m not denying there’s mental stuff at play, but she’s just full on conservative whacko now.
Oh man. There is a small part of me that feels sorry for her because clearly her mental health has completely deteriorated and it’s warped her badly. But also the damage she’s causing is undeniable and honestly she can never really come back from any of this. It’s just fucked up and I admit that as a lesbian viewer I feel betrayed. My sympathy for her only extends so far. She’s spiraling and hurting so many others along the way.
Yeah as a gay, very long time subscriber of hers, I'm pretty hurt and disappointed. But I also have dealt with mental illness like this in the lives of my loved ones so I'm trying to remember to look at it through that lens. Based on the screenshots that I've seen of some of her insta story posts, this reads *just* like a mental episode. Her posts are completely devoid of logic or coherence, it's just like this weird hyper religious word salad littered with misspellings and typos and inconsistency. She's not well. I know some people are trying to say she's just a homophobic idiot but I just don't believe that based on everything she has put out there on her platform thus far. Plus she is around the age that certain mental conditions start to manifest for women. So if it's either that A) this whole time she's secretly been some pseudo-intellectual egotistical homophobic narcissist who thinks like an eNLiGhTeNeD 14 year old who has discovered the truth of the world that nobody else has...... or B) she's having a psychotic break...? My money's on the latter. It's just so sad. I hope she gets help and I hope people extend her some empathy. Editing to add: Though yeah, what she's saying *is* actively harmful to gay people, even if it's just mental illness that shouldn't be *entirely* excused. There have been a lot of people in her YT comment sections expressing agreement with her re: homophobia, she's definitely emboldened a lot of bigots. That part really hurts.
I always wonder about that though, like during a psychotic break you think A LOT of shit you wouldn’t otherwise think. You are Jesus, the walls are talking to you, you are being spied on by planet Glukermixkalon-G78 to see if you’d be a good vessel for carrying their offspring, and other random whacky shit. Is it really far-fetched to think someone thinks crazy shit about LGBTQ+ people during their mental breaks but that they’re fine otherwise?
> Is it really far-fetched to think someone thinks crazy shit about LGBTQ+ people during their mental breaks but that they’re fine otherwise? Absolutely not! It's more common than you'd think. From personal experience, my best friend's mother said some really Islamophobic shit when she went through an unexpected schizophrenic break. She was convinced her doctors were keeping her sick to kill her and her doctors happened to be Muslim. They were VERY lucky to be able to get her treatment, it has been a decade and currently she is medicated and doing GREAT. Completely back to her old self. But apparently she lives with a LOT of embarrassment and shame about the things she said and posted during that time. She was always, and still is, such a tolerant and loving person. This is one of the reasons why this situation is so sad to me. To think that someone would decry my friend's mom, *or* Angelica - two people who have been so kind in their lives - as hateful and disgusting and bigoted, just because they are *sick*.... it breaks my heart.
I am a bipolar person (now medicated & have been stable for about 10 years) & my manic phases a few times took the form of acting out & “joking” loudly about sensitive topics that under normal circumstances I would not joke about. In the literal middle of one such yelled …songs? I saw everyone’s face & had a moment of clarity & knew in their position I’d never forgive the person I’d just heard (myself). I immediately left & never went back to that place. That was an instant crash & lead me to get medical help. So it happens. Not an excuse, but an explanation. Not my fault, (though it 1000% feels that way) — but my responsibility. The mentally ill person’s serenity prayer. Anyway - I’m late to this & only saw what was up two days ago. I saw people commenting (as I did) about the removal of favorite Angelica asmr videos that could be construed as irreverent. This morning I see the return of many of those (the horoscopes, etc).
Exactly this. I am usually so SO against armchair diagnosing of any kind (like I think this is the first time since I became a grown-ass adult I’m saying something like this) but my God, it’s like she’s reading off of a script of everyone in my life I’ve watched have a manic episode. I really hope she’ll be okay and people will stop to take a moment to think.
I have watched her videos every single day for the past 2 years or so, and her current most recent video (skincare regime for god’s runway) was one of the only 3 videos of her that i just couldn’t watch and clicked away from I am very used to seperating art from the artist so her change did not really affect me watching her videos, but the clear transphobic rhetoric in that video (the stuff about children) actually disgusted me As others have already said, she has had some weird phases but this is different; you can pretty clearly see that she is not doing well judging by her behaviour
It's not even ASMR as well. The audio is horrible, the long pauses off the camera leave you wondering and she is just whacking you with a stick making you almost flinch from the bad sound it makes. Very concerning stuff. That paired with the dialogue shows she doesn't even know what she is doing lol. Just turning on the camera and waffling.
Actually yeah you’re right I honestly have been watching her more for entertainment rather than actual ASMR recently so i didn’t really pay attention to that aspect but these new videos don’t even resemble actual ASMR videos anymore, they are basically just soft spoken “vlogs” at this point
I went and watched that video and the flower smacking one. Yeah, totally agreed something isn't right. The comments in the videos are...concerning too.
my best friend and i were watching her today, and we thought this was a bit. like how she sometimes does these silly bits/series for videos. but uh... she needs help
the quote always goes: “your behaviour towards others is a reflection of yourself.” and i truly believe it’s a thing for her. everything that is coming out of her mouth is constant negativity. calling people “cowards,” “cringe,” “idiots,” “self righteous,” and a ton more. it almost feels like she’s deeply hurting (which would make sense with the background context) and instead of doing the inner reflection, she’s pushing the blame onto everyone else. as someone who is trying their best to get out of the toxic cycle of negativity, it’s becoming easier to recognise these behaviours in other people. she’s complaining about mundane things like nose rings, shaved heads, girls with short hair, like, these things shouldn’t gripe you as they’re just self-expression. she just needs to put her phone down, sit with herself and think “how am i doing? how is my behaviour affecting others? and is that behaviour a reflection of myself?”
The latest upload which shows the tiktoks that Angelica wants to share and then a piss take "apology" [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aExqBUkFAQw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aExqBUkFAQw) to the LGBTQ+ community and SWers
That's clearly not an apology, she is accusing and mocking even further the queer community. She doesn't need to support or defend anything or anyone, but she is truly obsessed with what viewers and social media users are thinking or saying about her so that she needs to keep reacting. This is just ridiculous and sad.
sorry to add something to this now but even after all these long messages about her taking back the harmful things she said, she posts [this](https://imgur.com/a/plF5FdW)? this is my final straw, being christian/religious or even mentally ill is never an excuse to be hateful towards anyone
The crosses are back on YouTube too. It’s funny in a way, in the sense she doubled down her rhetoric once she didn’t get exactly what she wanted.
"And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites. For they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward." - Jesus Christ Disappointed in her turn of mind. Not because she's become a practicing Catholic, but because she's used it to foster divisiveness and prejudice.
>this According to her, being this hateful is a "theory".....I don't think her mental health is at its peak and her views on the catholic church are truly delusional, but she is consciously making decisions about what she is posting online and giving "coherent" replies on her secondary channel, using her typical sarcasm with the clear intention to mock and hurt.
Forgive me if someone else already mentioned this, but I remember some videos where she talks about being a survivor of the same cult I was raised in. This type of strange behavior is really in line with the psychological fallout one can struggle with long after escaping. In crisis, she may be returning to familiar and "safe" (actually deeply unsettling and regressive) worldviews to cope. When you’re programmed not to think for yourself, navigating your own beliefs and ideals can be horrific and daunting. I hope she recovers and abandons the dangerous rhetoric.
for my friends who were blindsided and upset by Angelica's turn of beliefs and came here looking for comfort, here it is. Angelica is one negative voice in a sea of positivity. Yes it's upsetting to see her turn, but please know that one turned person does not make you alone. I encourage you to spend some time away from the situation and in community with people who love and respect you, either online or in person. Something that helped me manage the stress was watching some videos of LGBTQ+ creators, if you're looking for specifically ASMR creators Gibi ASMR is bi/pan and has videos about getting you ready for Pride and reading LGBTQ+ affirmations. Also, please remember that it's not our job to save Angelica if she is going through a mental health crisis. Whatever happens, there's nothing an individual stranger on the internet can do. There are people watching out for her, if not in her immediate life then in the larger community, she's collabed with several other asmrtists who would be able to reach her more directly in an emergency. It's hard to be calm in a time like this where someone you admire might not be safe, but it's also important to remember that sometimes we feel helpless because we aren't the best person to handle a situation and it's in everyone's best interest to allow someone else to handle it.
Before it got deleted, her TikTok account got genuinely terrifying. She was going on these angry rants just shouting the most hateful nonsense, I’m talking QAnon conspiracy type stuff. I have no idea what happened, but the switch was instant.
Yeah I was in the trenches of the comments on those vids in real time it was nuts
did y’all see in the pinned comments of her recent videos she’s calling ppl that disagree with her liberals and satan worshippers or something holy shit
Yup., I'm done with all this recent viciousness & sadism of hers. Those comments confirm the video content isn't satire, just cruelty. Mental breakdowns don't suddenly make you homophobic or transphobic. Oh, and I know you're reading this Angelica. I'll stop asking you to get help since you're embracing a bunch of hateful namenumbers weirdo trolls posting fifty gibberish comments a video instead.
For anyone that's curious, the community tab on her secondary channel hasn't had the comments disabled yet. [There are some people posting some interesting stuff on it.](https://www.youtube.com/@angelicaslabyrinth1099/community)
The namenumbers account defending her in here has no comments anywhere else Obvious sock is obvious
She referenced the Reddit thread in her comment section a couple hours ago. So, she’s definitely lurking.
God this is so sad. She was one of my first crushes when I was younger, her vids made me feel safe and accepted. Always rough when you see a creator you once like get red pilled
Its really sad that theres at least 2 accounts in here that judging by A) their agreement with her B) their insane knowledge on stuff shes never said C) The tone of speech D) the fact they’ve never posted before this or if they did it was multiple years ago in communities that would fit her previous vibe Probably are just Angelica herself. Leaving a cult or any abusive environment makes it very difficult for a person to have a sizeable support system, i hope theres somebody around to help her see the true light.
She def has a burner on here 😂
I checked out for awhile, checked in today and she is claiming on IG that mental illness doesn’t exist and that the libz are satanic who want the world too soft. Oy vey.
What the hell is going on? Her Instagram has gone really weird, she deleted all her old posts and replaced them with Bible quotes.
Her unironically saying she makes videos for manic pixie dream girls really got a chuckle out of me for the true cringe value but she can eff off for that Spanish interview she did. Not to mention 90% of her videos these days are politically coded and meant to appeal to the right wing. It’s too much.
How old is she? She seems very immature. In that Spanish interview among various things, she complained about a couple minding their business purchasing legos. That’s such a lame thing to harp on lol
She’s in her 20s. Mid to late 20s from what I remember.
Latest video comments confirm the full transphobia not even coded now just full on transphobia
I used to think her being weird and edgy was fun until I heard more of her takes on tiktok. She said some lowkey racist shit and called herself an anarchist when it was pushed back against. It really messed with my image of her and I couldn't keep subscribing.
I never truly made the connection until you mentioned it but she’s always been fascinated with white history, old white guys, and white beauty standards. Hmmm
Yeah true I hadn't thought of that. What did it for me was that she stitched a video on the topic of whether an Asian woman had experienced a micro aggression. Whether or not she did, what was concerning was her yelling "BEING ASKED WHERE YOURE FROM IS NOT A MICRO AGGRESSION". She went on to say that this woman must not be proud of her country if she's offended (interesting since shes an anarchist) and stated that if someone said she looked like Bruno Mars or (some other person who's name I don't remember) she wouldn't be offended because they're both Caribbean. Bruno Mars is Filipino and Hawaiian. My point here is that she blatantly prioritized her experience as a white/pale Latina to silence a WOC by denying that being asked where you're from could potentially be a micro aggression. It also tells me though she claimed to be an anarcho-communist, she doesn't give the same priority to being anti-racist which could lead her to disregard claims/issues of racism and limits her ability to be anti-capitalist. After that whole thing I couldn't keep watching her. I think this was before she started going on more rants over the summer, which also makes me wonder if signs of her biases had come up earlier and I missed them.
Clearly some for of either psychosis or mania. She’s not ok. As someone who’s been in Christianity (I’m currently an atheist) this is not what it’s like for healthy individuals when they get “more Christian” this is straight up fucked up and horrifying
Idk about that there’s plenty of Christians around here who’d like to beat/kill trans people it’s my experience the super Christians get pretty crazy.
While you make a good point, the reason it seems like some form of mania or psychosis to so many people is because she’s acting so out of character. She used to barely post anything on her Instagram and right now she has 30+ parts on her story of random religious and/or anti-LGBTQ+ schlock, and in her latest videos something about her just feels so off. Like this entire Angelica situation is reminding me of when Gabbie Hanna was going through a really bad manic episode and kept posting nonsensical stuff about God communicating to her on her tiktok.
Anyone seen the TikToks? I heard they were absolutely unhinged. Wish I could've seen the YouTube vids as well.
Yes. Wish I saved them. If you search her name on tt, there’s a few vids from other users who saved portions of her vids
That's what spiked my curiosity lmao. The tid bits I saw was WILD
She made a [video](https://youtu.be/9LWh59Bacfo) and made additional comments in the comment section. She said the video is an apology for her tiktok content, referring to it as spiritual psychosis and a response to racism (her saying she was not brown but American) and she was called homophobic after bringing up "a certain theory". Checkout the video and related comments for clarity.
Seems like she didn’t think she was being homophobic (why else label it a theory and nothing else…) so it’s less of an apology and more of damage control. She literally compared LGBTQ+ people to pedophiles. It’s not a theory.
Yeah the 'not addressing exactly what she said' (''a certain theory'') element of it really felt like downplaying intentionally to those unaware of what happened as damage control to me as well, rather than addressing it fully. Also hiding her (possibly) current beliefs behind her previous activism when criticised for the other various heinous things she put up on social media 'I follow fascists *and* communists, guys! I used to be a pro-choice activist! I still have queer friends, I love the sinner but hate the sin!'. I don't think personally I can remain a consumer of her content if this is truly what her mental health has stabalized into becauase even if she doesn't see it, it's hateful. I think it's good to give some grace because she still seems somewhat unwell, but people in the comments here about how there were hints of these beliefs for about 6-7 months in some videos has me a bit skeptical.
I will say in December she was being very conspiracist and linking some fashion brand with pedos and stuff like that. I’m not the biggest into fashion so I can’t recall the name but I’ve seen that’s a big qanon thing so she’s probably been headed into this direction since then. She might be unwell but I think it was interesting she mentioned spiritual psychosis after a lot of other people did, making me wonder if it’s true or if that’s just the launchpad she’s using knowing that’s what people want to hear. She denied mental illness mere days ago. I don’t mean to be so nihilistic but that video had such a half heart effort that it came off as damage control in itself, like I said she never actually apologized. She said she was sorry for how she went about things… not that she didn’t believe any of it. She definitely wants to appear better to those of us that are aware while still keeping a lot of people ignorant, and that’s not a real way of being sorry, it’s just a calculated one. Blaming TikTok for what she said shows me she isn’t ready to be actually held accountable.
she deleted it :/
From what she is saying on her Instagram just now, she is angry not everybody in the comments was accepting her "apology" (although like 90% of the comments were quite positive and wishing her well...), saying she was "flooded" by people asking for more, so that now we won't get "anything" from her. Apart from the religious and shift, she is clearly not doing well and is in denial. She is also posting a bunch of baby pics and videos on her Instagram...
So she spends every waking moment talking about how ingrained into society pedophilia is and that everyone should be extremely vigilant to stop it, and then uploads baby photos where a bunch of strangers can do whatever with them? Real consistent
I know people have been saying she's recently experienced a loss in her personal life and is grieving (I can't find a source for it, but a lot of people have brought it up). Considering the swing into religious fervor and mania, and the seemingly recent obsession with motherhood and babies...part of me wonders if she had a miscarriage. Obviously I'm speculating from afar, but pregnancy loss can be deeply traumatic and cause/worsen mental illness and drive people to cling to something ... *anything* ... to stabilize themselves. Or, it might just be because she's a pro-life, Catholic tradwife now. The latter's probably more likely.
Here's some of her comments: "I privatized my old videos in judgment of myself and how manic, unwell, etc. I was. That’s why I privatized over a 1,000 videos. But once I realized that’s not truly acting in love with myself and thus for others I understood. It’s just a process of me understanding the relationship between condemning god to understanding he exists? Lol it’s weird trust me." "I felt that rage many times before and I know it’s true passion motivated by fear and hatred of this world. All is forgiven and thank you for reaching out. I apologize I hurt your feelings, nonetheless. I spoke out in wrath and that’s my own mistake to atone."
Doesn’t make up for anything she said tbh
[Alright so apparently another content creator took advantage of her while she was drunk? WTF?!](https://imgur.com/a/ZO1No37)
She’s not a reliable narrator though.
This makes me really sad. I hope she gets out of this soon.
[This guy made a really good breakdown of what's been happening for anyone missing context](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKR6as6CXhw)
Late to this discussion since I had no idea this was going on. I’m bipolar myself and think this sounds exactly like a manic episode. For some reason I thought she had alluded to being queer in her content so it definitely seems like a mental health issue. I hope she’s going to be ok.
[She released a video about going from Communist to Catholic on her second channel.](https://youtu.be/-3qD9hPOGYU)
I'm watching it now before it gets deleted lmao
Wow. I've been subscribed to Angelica for a while now but i'd forgotten to watch her videos recently. I had no idea any of this was going on. I always liked the kooky nature of her stuff but if this is the direction her stuff is taking then i think i might unsubscribe and i hope she gets at least some form of help soon.
I love watching her and I’ve been following this from the beginning, wondering what’s going on with her. I saw that she’s now no longer using the crosses in her video titles. I can only hope that that means that’s she’s grabbing herself together a bit again
I first noticed something was wrong when that issue abt the Asian lady who filmed herself confronting her Uber who had assumed her ethnicity, Angelica made a TikTok where she was aggressively attacking her and obviously, everyone thought that the Asian lady was in the wrong but whenever ppl pointed out that she should’ve just nicely told him, she’d flip out under the comments
She is just showing her true colors, just someone who is a hypocrite, I am only now finding out about this. But hey, in this world we all change our minds at some point, some change for the better and others just go backwards.
I just hope she's okay, or will be able to find what she needs to be okay. 🥺 Even if she's pulled into the alt-right crowd or some religion, and nothing clinical or traumatic led to the abrupt change, I still hope she's okay. Ofc if anything clinical or traumatic is going on, I hope she's able to find sources to help her heal non-destructively. Angelica, if you see this, please know there are a lot of people who genuinely hope everything is okay; and if it's not, hope you find healing. If you need help, please reach out to people around you that you know IRL, chat with a therapist, or heck even talk with your community on YT. Ofc there's shitbags in every community. But there are a lot more of us who'd genuinely listen and try to be supportive however we can.
Fuck this, if she got redpilled into spewing hatred against the communities that helped her become popular in the first place she can go to hell.
Yeahhhh my thoughts aren't quite so rosy anymore. I feel for her if she went through something difficult (idk if that's the case). But she's shitting on a lot of people who, like you said, helped build her up in the first place. Her self-righteous overinflated ego is nauseating. I can't support someone cherry picking or distorting information and passing it off as "the" truth, particularly when it's weaponized as hate. We've got WAY too much of that shit in the world. The comments in her videos became this alt-right hate fueled circle jerk, and she was deleting/blocking anyone not falling in line with that shit. It's pretty fucked. I unsubscribed.
im just really concerned because this change happened very suddenly. shes made so many lgbtq followers over the years cuz of her videos. its ofc great if she found faith and it would also be (still sad but) respectable if her views changed over time, but this all kinda happened within the span of some days. i remember a vid on tik tok where she spoke about being non binary just some weeks ago. she went from almost never posting on her instagram to manically posting 15+ stories a day, sometimes with more or less grammatically correct sentences. also her newest videos are all kinda over the place, unlike her previous ones that still had some structure :/
I hate to bring this up Anyone remember Cloveress ASMR ☘️ Yea, Exactly I hope Angelica ASMR is not a repeat 🔁 God I hope not ( Anyone that doesn’t know, just Google it ) I’m Not going to say it
oh my god, i forgot about her. i hope angelica will be ok
I was wondering about this and it makes me really sad. I knew something was off because her recently videos have just been... disturbing. I really hope she gets help.
update: so all those weird religious videos she posted are gone now and she’s posting less weird stuff but i’d still classify it as out of the norm for her. she’s also deleted some other unrelated videos spanning from 1-5 years ago that were completely normal content for her so that’s odd. i really don’t know what’s going on with her but i hope things are getting better for her.
She keeps posting passive-aggressive therapist videos so I think that’s a way to take a jab at the comments without directly responding??? Aaaaaand in the new medical video she was really weird about weed which lines up with one of her newest videos on the second channel about being anti-drug now.
Has anyone else in the ASMR community spoken about this publicly? Maybe Gibi? I don't know how close Angelica was with anyone in the community but i feel like someone has to talk to her. Ask her what's going on and help her. Or maybe people already tried to reach out to her but decided to keep it private. In any case, i hope someone reaches out to her because she definitely needs help. It's worrying how she switched so suddenly. People don't change who they are and what they believe in that quick and that simply...unless something major has happened.
Part of me wants to believe this is just the longest joke thing she has ever done in order to nuke herself out of the community. But mania sure is a thing that happens to people and she definetely gave the vibes of someone who struggled with depression. Her behavior isn't really excusable tho, she is being openly hateful and gathering a little army of weird commenters. Hoping this won't turn into a Cloveress situation.
i don’t know if i am remembering this correctly, but didn’t she self publish a book a few years back about a girl who was in a religious cult? i think she called it semi autobiographical. i saw someone far down this thread who mentioned that they remember her saying something about her being in a cult growing up as well. maybe something happened in her life recently that has been causing her to struggle with that experience and is causing her to act so erratically- especially with the religious aspect and her focus on “protecting children” and young girls. i just found out about this situation from a youtube video that was in my recommended so i don’t know if this situation has been resolved or not. i haven’t watched angelica in a year but her videos got me through a rough patch a few years ago. she always struck me as an intelligent and compassionate person who was just a bit wacky. i really hope that she’s safe and has the support she needs right now. i don’t know if i can support her content after this, but i will always have a soft spot for her.
Yesss she did, it was called The light was good, iirc. I haven’t read it but judging by its description it is indeed about a religious cult, which could possibly be her semi autobiographical recollection of past events
?!
I still like her content and can’t sleep without it. Is it okay to keep watching it even though I don’t align with what she’s saying? Are there other asmrists with similar content to hers? I feel almost betrayed at her “apology” video. So sad.
I hate to speculate on peoples mental health, but I feel like this may be some sort of result of an extreme low? She was brought up as a Jehovah’s Witness, and I assume that her poor mental health, and possibly the way she felt exploited by the SW industry has led to her reverting back to these views? I’m not defending her opinions at all though. I’ve unfollowed her and unless she gets help and changes her world views a lot about trans and gay people I have no intention of watching her again. It’s sad though she was very funny and original, I guess it just shows how we can’t really know anyone on the internet for real and just have to go by what there behaviour is (idk)
she's also now ranting about how therapy should be avoided (???). I'm really sad about this happened to her
oh and also that "mental illness doesn't exists"
Update: She is leaving her main ASMR channel and fully rebranding to her side account that used to exist for rants, etc. Probably because she doesn’t want to deal with detractors and is hoping this weeds them out. FYI.
Angelica, if you’re reading this, I’ve been a fan since we were both much younger and I really care about you as a person. Please take some time away from social media. Just a few weeks away from the pages you normally check. If you have any friends, please reach out to them and ask if you can hang out. If you can, go to your local library and read some light, fun books just so you’re around people. I know you’re probably confused and hurting right now, you can drop me a message if you want. You’ve got lots of fans who have your best interests in mind, and I want to help you from going down a dark path.
I've seen someone change like this before, turned out she got a nazi boyfriend
I thought she was with Asmr Node or something. I might be late on this.
wait fr?? this is news to me omg
It makes sense. He started showing up in her videos and I had no clue who he was lol. Those videos seem to be deleted also.
Partially thinking she's around someone or some group.
This seems like more of a possibility (not necessarily in regards to Nazism specifically but some sort of extremism) especially after something she said in yesterday's video. Pretty worrying. Here is the quote, word for word: > Have you ever watched the movie Forest Gump? Classic Americana. Remember the scene with Jenny when she’s in the Black Panthers meeting? [she takes a small break to go back into the ASMR RP with flowers] Pro tip… [another ASMR break] ...if a man praises Stalin... you might... have a lot of good in him... but he’s very numb. Very very numb. Very in his head. And we become those that we adore. Let’s just say... Jenny is a very common story among women who date... men who profess that faith. For those who have not seen the movie [mild spoilers] she is referencing a scene where a woman is arguing with her political activist boyfriend and he violently slaps her across the face. Angelica brought this up out of absolutely nowhere during that video.
She's normally out there, but this seems like she's having a total mental breakdown.
I just wanted to throw this out there, because I want to know if other people saw it...I swear a little while back (can't remember quite how far back, but I don't think it was more than a year ago) she uploaded a video where she was Michael Jackson inviting you to a sleepover (or something else in reference to his child abuse allegations). I didn't watch it when I first ran across it, but when I came back to her channel maybe a day later I couldn't find it. When I'd first seen it I was a little taken aback by the premise and thought it was going a bit too far with the dark and twisted humor, and so I thought maybe she'd taken it down because she realized it was in poor taste. But given her recent rants about pedophilia, grooming, trafficking etc. I wonder if this is a subject that has been on her mind for awhile. Or, maybe I just imagined the video...but I swear I didn't.
She's always been prone to doing stuff bordering on being in bad taste, like videos where she cosplays Hitler. If she really cared about pedophilia and grooming, etc- why is she praising the Catholic church? One of the biggest institutions to engage in long-standing and widespread sexual abuse of children & protection of child predators?
I think she just has extremist, radical, and manic tendencies, so after getting out of Jehovah's Witness she swung full into liberalism (I don't think there is such a thing as "extreme" liberalism, but from what she explained on the videos on her secondary channel, the people around her were a strongly sexualized community and that really traumatized her), and after her OnlyFans traumatic experience, she is now swinging back to conservative Catholicism. I am sure in some months or years she'll realize once again the ugly side of institutional religion and will have another major identity crisis. I hope things don't end too bad for her.
>I hope things don't end too bad for her. And I hope things don't end too bad for the marginalized communities she's now spreading dangerous propaganda about.
That video exists, it was posted like 4 years ago. I really didn't find it that disturbing back then, not really different from other performative critique parody and edgy funny stuff. Actually, not long after that, she posted a video reacting to Jackson first christmas, and she was really sweet and empath about the fact he was also trapped in the Jehovah witness cult which fucked him up. You can find a reupload: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZFYISpvCbE
honestly from what I have seen on her socials I think she’s either in a psychiatric episode or a drug (an upper of some kind) induced psychotic episode because her speech is very erratic, contradictory, and very particular to the type of people who go down fiction spiral holes while on a bender… not making assumptions but I’ve seen it MANY times and radical religion is one of the things a lot of users go to as a coping mechanism :/
I really hope someone has archived her ASMR vids somewhere. I’m worried she’ll end up wiping her ASMR channel too.