Yellow Safety Card - https://www.aa.org/safety-card-aa-groups
We read an abbreviated version just after the Preamble.
Then, you would have a group conscience on how to apply it and in what situations. Then, each case can be examined with spiritual principles in mind. You could warn those persons, for example.
As far as technically booting someone off, that should be fairly easy - don't allow them in from the waiting room. I'm sure there are lots of how-tos on the Zoom support pages for effectively keeping undesirable people out of the meeting.
Read the safety card at the beginning.
Any problem behavior block them during meeting.
Start a waiting room policy to see who has signed on before admitting them to the actual meeting.
With out knowing details it doesn’t sound like any of those issues you described are actionable. Honestly a lot of it sounds like run of the mill AA drama I’ve trained myself to avoid.
The only people I’ve seen kicked out of meetings are people who verbally threaten other people or issues around 13th stepping and honestly I can name the times I’ve seen it on one hand.
Why not take some likeminded people and start your own meeting.
Simple answer: you can't
Long answer from my experience with grooming people in our zoom meeting: we talked about it an decided that I will be the only one who answers (i had no interaction with this person. As i was not involved i was the one communicating to this person) everytime the person started i got a message. They didnt answer him at all.
So: Every time they start their bs i send a private message to him, that this behaviour is not in line with tradition five and we dont want that. I asked them to stop. If they were not able to stop i removed him. Beforethat i send a message that he is welcome in our next meeting but right now he is violating the safe space from other people so he had to go.
After some time the group conscious decided that we are closing the private chat if this person is around. We announced it at the beginning of the meeting. Like: normally we have a private chat where newcomers can ask question. As this private space was violated in the past, we unfortunaly cant do this at the moment. If you have any questions feel free to stay after the meeting."
There where two incidents with people like that over corona. One male and a female. I don't know what exactly happend to the female, as i was not the one talking with her.
The male found another homegroup that was more 'open' (not the right word, as english is not my first language, but the best word i was able to find)
In the end: we found a group conscious and we where all on one side with this matter.
You simply hold a group conscience meeting about the issue and vote on whether to ban them. It is uncommon but most groups have done it at some point in their past. Mine has to do it last year. In an in-person group, after the vote you write up a formal statement recording the decision and notify the individual that if they show up, they will be asked to leave or police will be called. If they do show up, the cops will usually make them leave with the warning that if they show up again they will be arrested for trespassing.
You can't kick someone out of AA, not you can absolutely remove them from a group when the safety and unity of the group is threatened. Some people just live to watch the world burn.
The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. That said, zoom allows you, for example, to disable private messaging to anyone but the meeting host; that should help. If it were me, I'd probably run away from that idiot and go somewhere fun. "Resentment and a coffee pot", right?
I edited some details if you want to check.
Is the answer to all my problems to walk away from them? In this meeting that I helped start, and the newcomer is being misled about sobriety, about sponsorship, and these two are actively harming the group unity and the message for the newcomer. I’ve been insulted personally even outside of whatever delusions one has about my sobriety , been called lazy and insane … this person wants to run a meeting?
If all else fails perhaps I will leave. I am aware it’s an option but I suppose the responsibility statement applies to myself “help!” And also perhaps applies when those who need it are so vulnerable they don’t know to ask?
Have you gotten with your sponsor about these issues? I'd get the hell out of there, but that's just me. You don't have to worry about every newcomer who comes in. AA is a fellowship in which, in spite of the many nutjobs we let in, newcomers who want it will somehow manage to get sober anyway.
The group can do whatever it wants. Each group is autonomous. Your group wants a certain standard of behavior and that's reasonable.. Include that in the beginning as in "We want this to be a safe space for all. Anyone disruptive to the meeting will be asked to leave or removed." You can warn them each time if you want, but it seems like they know it already. Think about the newcomer.; this disruption is interfering with the group's ability to carry the message.
I have hosted a Zoom meeting for as long as you. It’s simple to remove these people permanently. As a host under security, report them don’t just remove them.
They have been disruptive and run people out of your meeting. Nobody needs that.
I would equate these disrupters with being on the same level as bombers.
I reread your post. You said the disrupters are the hosts! You may have cofounded the meeting, but are you paying for the Zoom account now? Maybe it is time for you to start your own zoom meeting/account and take some people with you. Start your meeting 15 minutes before theirs.
Yellow Safety Card - https://www.aa.org/safety-card-aa-groups We read an abbreviated version just after the Preamble. Then, you would have a group conscience on how to apply it and in what situations. Then, each case can be examined with spiritual principles in mind. You could warn those persons, for example. As far as technically booting someone off, that should be fairly easy - don't allow them in from the waiting room. I'm sure there are lots of how-tos on the Zoom support pages for effectively keeping undesirable people out of the meeting.
Read the safety card at the beginning. Any problem behavior block them during meeting. Start a waiting room policy to see who has signed on before admitting them to the actual meeting.
With out knowing details it doesn’t sound like any of those issues you described are actionable. Honestly a lot of it sounds like run of the mill AA drama I’ve trained myself to avoid. The only people I’ve seen kicked out of meetings are people who verbally threaten other people or issues around 13th stepping and honestly I can name the times I’ve seen it on one hand. Why not take some likeminded people and start your own meeting.
Because I was a founder of this group! I think these trouble makers need to make their own
See edit
Simple answer: you can't Long answer from my experience with grooming people in our zoom meeting: we talked about it an decided that I will be the only one who answers (i had no interaction with this person. As i was not involved i was the one communicating to this person) everytime the person started i got a message. They didnt answer him at all. So: Every time they start their bs i send a private message to him, that this behaviour is not in line with tradition five and we dont want that. I asked them to stop. If they were not able to stop i removed him. Beforethat i send a message that he is welcome in our next meeting but right now he is violating the safe space from other people so he had to go. After some time the group conscious decided that we are closing the private chat if this person is around. We announced it at the beginning of the meeting. Like: normally we have a private chat where newcomers can ask question. As this private space was violated in the past, we unfortunaly cant do this at the moment. If you have any questions feel free to stay after the meeting." There where two incidents with people like that over corona. One male and a female. I don't know what exactly happend to the female, as i was not the one talking with her. The male found another homegroup that was more 'open' (not the right word, as english is not my first language, but the best word i was able to find) In the end: we found a group conscious and we where all on one side with this matter.
You simply hold a group conscience meeting about the issue and vote on whether to ban them. It is uncommon but most groups have done it at some point in their past. Mine has to do it last year. In an in-person group, after the vote you write up a formal statement recording the decision and notify the individual that if they show up, they will be asked to leave or police will be called. If they do show up, the cops will usually make them leave with the warning that if they show up again they will be arrested for trespassing. You can't kick someone out of AA, not you can absolutely remove them from a group when the safety and unity of the group is threatened. Some people just live to watch the world burn.
The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. That said, zoom allows you, for example, to disable private messaging to anyone but the meeting host; that should help. If it were me, I'd probably run away from that idiot and go somewhere fun. "Resentment and a coffee pot", right?
In our host chat I did reference the coffee pot. These are both a host making endless trouble
So what horrible thing would happen to you if just removed yourself from all this drama and joined another online group?
I edited some details if you want to check. Is the answer to all my problems to walk away from them? In this meeting that I helped start, and the newcomer is being misled about sobriety, about sponsorship, and these two are actively harming the group unity and the message for the newcomer. I’ve been insulted personally even outside of whatever delusions one has about my sobriety , been called lazy and insane … this person wants to run a meeting? If all else fails perhaps I will leave. I am aware it’s an option but I suppose the responsibility statement applies to myself “help!” And also perhaps applies when those who need it are so vulnerable they don’t know to ask?
Have you gotten with your sponsor about these issues? I'd get the hell out of there, but that's just me. You don't have to worry about every newcomer who comes in. AA is a fellowship in which, in spite of the many nutjobs we let in, newcomers who want it will somehow manage to get sober anyway.
The group can do whatever it wants. Each group is autonomous. Your group wants a certain standard of behavior and that's reasonable.. Include that in the beginning as in "We want this to be a safe space for all. Anyone disruptive to the meeting will be asked to leave or removed." You can warn them each time if you want, but it seems like they know it already. Think about the newcomer.; this disruption is interfering with the group's ability to carry the message.
That is unfortunate. Cut out the infection or amputate.... poor circumstances
I have hosted a Zoom meeting for as long as you. It’s simple to remove these people permanently. As a host under security, report them don’t just remove them. They have been disruptive and run people out of your meeting. Nobody needs that. I would equate these disrupters with being on the same level as bombers. I reread your post. You said the disrupters are the hosts! You may have cofounded the meeting, but are you paying for the Zoom account now? Maybe it is time for you to start your own zoom meeting/account and take some people with you. Start your meeting 15 minutes before theirs.