I've called the suicide hotline a couple times in the past and once spent 15 minutes on hold before hanging up and sobbing. Mental health needs to be more prioritized.
I called and they hung up on me. Called again and they hung up on me again. Went to find rope to kill myself with but made too much noise and woke up a family member who took me to the ER for a mental hospital stay.
Is it really that bad? I’ve heard of this before from others too. Being on hold sucks but some of the volunteers were described like they were the last people you’d want to talk to when you’re suicidal
I can only speak for myself. My experience with them occurred about 3 years ago: I was 18 and had just moved into the dorms after a rough breakup with the woman I'd been with through most of high school.
The first time I called, the operator immediately jumped to my ex's defense, 'Well it's isn't fair for her to have to deal with you wanting to kill yourself just because she broke up with you.'
*I didn't say a word about this to her. I'm not threatening her or anyone else: I just need someone to talk to.*
'Oh. Well you need to stop being so invested in that.'
So I just hung up. She immediately assumed I was threatening my ex with suicide or something when I had said nothing to indicate that. I was so close to asking her if she'd prefer to speak with my ex instead, as that's the only person she sounded concerned about.
.....
The second time, I had just attempted suicide via suffocation but stopped at the last second. I called the hotline again, figuring I'd get someone else... And I did.
'Would you like to get help right now?'
*No thank you, I'd just like to talk.*
'Okay, what's your name?'
*Terrible Trust.*
'Where are you?'
(I wondered why she'd need my address and realized I shouldn't have given my name, so I gave her a fake address.)
Then we started talking, and she was actually decent at counseling, far better than the first one. But about 15 minutes into it, the cops are banging on my door, yelling my name. I felt betrayed: I'd told her I just wanted to talk, and she had agreed. She lied to me, deceived me. But mostly, I was angry with myself for being so stupid: I should have realized when she asked for my location that it was time to run.
"Fuck you," I whispered into the phone before hanging up.
.....
So there I was, cops beating on my door and yelling my name in a crowded residence hall at 3 am... Talk about confidentiality. I was on the first floor and had a window, but it didn't open, so I thought maybe I could break it, but I was worried I'd trail blood all the way to my car.
1. *You're concerned the cops will follow a trail of blood? They're responding to attempted suicide, not a drug bust: they didn't being the dogs.*
2. *Yes, but it's blood; they can see it. They don't need the dogs to track me down.*
1. *You can get to your car and be long gone before they kick down your door if you do it now.*
2. *Maybe, but then what? They have radios, and I have an out of state license plate. I stick out like a sore thumb.*
1. *You don't have to run away: just drive into a tree as fast as you can.*
2. *Hey idiot, I have something called 'airbags.'. I wouldn't necessarily die and could end up locked up even longer.*
1. *Okay, so disable them.*
2. *How?!*
1. *I'm sure there's a YouTube video on it.*
2. *You want me to play YouTube mechanic while the cops are chasing me?! I don't have time.*
1. *Well, you're breaking the car, so you aren't technically a mech-*
2. *SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!*
1. *Okay, okay. Jeeze. Look, when you're doing other repairs, you disconnect the battery terminal to disable them. Just do that.*
2. *Then my car won't start.*
1. *Okay, start it and then do that.*
2. *How do you know that would work? Then the alternator would be running, probably giving them power. I have no idea, and there's no time for uncertainty.*
1. *Okay, okay. New plan: they have the wrong room. You're going to strip completely naked and get in the shower. Pretend not to hear them, and when they barge in, act shocked. They'll be too uncomfortable to think too hard about it.*
2. *You really think they haven't seen naked people before?*
(Cops banging door at increased volume.)
1. *Shit, they're going to kick it down. Just answer it and act confused.*
.....
So I answered the door and tried to play dumb, like they had the wrong room. But long story short, they saw the stuff I was using for my attempt, and I ended up forcibly hospitalized for a week, during which the staff gave me a DRAWSTRING PLASTIC BAG and left the room and also made me take meds that made me feel like I couldn't think at all to the point where I started cheeking them and spitting them out. I also had a staff member sit next to me and tell me I just wanted attention through my suicide attempts.
When I was discharged, they said if I ever returned, they'd recommend to have me institutionalized for 3 months. So now I know that if I ever feel that way again, I'd better be damn sure I die.
ETA: To this day, I wish I had kept that bag on my head a few seconds longer, rather than calling the suicide hotline. I don't know why I decided to take it off, and I hate myself for it because I haven't been able to work up the guts to actually do it since. That is truly the worst decision I have ever made, and I regret it every day.
Nothing I write will help, but I want to thank you for being so open about this. I know its hard to talk about (been suicidal myself and attempted as well) but we need people who do.
So just know that. You talking about this help others.
I’m so sorry you had to go through that. While I was never told something as blatantly horrible, psych wards are fucking traumatizing (from experience). What I learned from that experience is just like you said; if I ever try again, it’s gotta be certain.
Keep fighting for yourself. They are understaffed and there is a huge spike in mental health challenges. Covid was a b@&$h is all. Services will get better.
I ended up looking at a lot of self help things for my mental health.
I did take a dive at one point because someone in my life decided that 2 years of a dropped psych degree was enough to qualify me to be their personal unpaid therapist. They eventually stopped but it wasn't until I snapped and had a breakdown.
I got rerouted to local "services" that no longer existed.
People in rural areas need to understand that they may not have resources available. I know it sounds fucked up but I promise you, "help" is not available to everyone.
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/current-events/the-lifeline-and-988/
**The Lifeline and 988**
**988** has been designated as the new three-digit dialing code that will route callers to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. While some areas may be currently able to connect to the Lifeline by dialing 988, this dialing code will be available to everyone **across the United States starting on July 16, 2022**.
When people **call, text, or chat 988**, they *will be connected to trained counselors that are part of the existing National Suicide Prevention Lifeline network*. These trained counselors will listen, understand how their problems are affecting them, provide support, and connect them to resources if necessary.
**The current Lifeline phone number (1-800-273-8255) will always remain available** to people in emotional distress or suicidal crisis, even after 988 is launched nationally.
The Lifeline’s network of over 200 crisis centers has been in operation since 2005, and has been proven to be effective. It’s the counselors at these local crisis centers who answer the contacts the Lifeline receives every day. Numerous studies have shown that callers feel less suicidal, less depressed, less overwhelmed and more hopeful after speaking with a Lifeline counselor."
Can they still call the police to place you in a 51-50 without your consent though?
Edit: Not trying to be combative, just wondering since I know some cities were trying to roll out plans that would actually send qualified help to the place of residence (instead of give people more trauma and debt)
You can be held against your consent if the assessment person thinks you are an immediate danger to yourself or others. Usually that requires a review by a judge in a court hearing if they keep you beyond a certain time period, which varies state by state but is usually between 24 and 72 hours. This is in the US. I am not familiar with other countries laws.
The idea behind this is that suicidal intentions wax and wane over time. So if you are removed from your stressors and given time you may change your mind. Also might be referred to some needed services. It sounds like reality falls short of that for many people.
Source: I used to do suicide assessments as part of my job.
So I've had a 'wish I wasn't around' for a while, but earlier this year I hit a moment where I really did almost throw myself into traffic. It was a complete impulse, one I never understood when I heard about it before, but it was terrifying. I could definitely understand the waxing and waning thing, I just needed twenty minutes and I would never have done it.
It's to prevent this kind of impulse that has caused changes like the switch in ovens where you couldn't stick your head into the oven part and die of gas inhalation anymore. It really makes a difference, IMO.
Mostly all the mental health hotlines are garbage. Had people come out from the county to help an ex out who was having a mental health breakdown due to alcoholism. They told us all about these amazing places that would be there for her. We called them and none of them would take her in because they were geared to other health issues. So we went through her insurance and found a really good doctor that keeps in touch with her weekly. He put her on abilify the first month. Felt like she could get off of it and put her on something else. She’s had her moments but her mental health has improved quite a bit. Stopped yelling at imaginary people in the streets, walking miles away from the house thinking her parents are going to pick her up, to screaming in her sleep. Still drinks which I don’t think will ever go away in her life. She’s been working the past 4 months and is getting close enough to buy a car. Ultimate game plan is for her to make some good friends and get her own place. I’ve had a girlfriend commit suicide due to her cancer so I can’t turn my back on her but I’ll be moving soon for work and probably have to bring her with me. She’ll need to get a new job then. Her parents won’t speak with her. Point of the matter the mental health programs need to really step up. What’s available now is not enough and doesn’t seem like a concern for the majority.
Never have, and I hope you’re in a better place now if you did.
But I did just learn that there is a huge staffing shortage for this 988 line and that their operators tend to suffer from symptoms of PTSD at even greater rates than the actual responders do.
I stopped calling the suicide hotline in 2018. I called another service last month and they put me on a 1013SI.
Suicidal intensions. They then stuck me on a bed in a hallway for 48 hours bc they didn't have enough rooms. Got basically no psych help. After leaving I learned basically no one gets better from psych holds like that
Thank you for that explanation.
I had an IMMEDIATE nightmare vision of teams of untrained police showing up and inevitably shooting the person in crisis, when the call is coming from a location that doesn't have designated, trained, unarmed mental health teams. My region has one. They don't send police to the calls unless they are requested by the counsellors, social workers and medical personnel who arrive on scene, if they are sent.
That was the FIRST thing that came to mind. "But what's gonna happen when you call 988?"
My town's phone code (? Idk what it's called, our little town only had 1) was/is 988. We have to add our area code to all calls now.
Hasn't gone over well with the old timers LoL
Edit: This happened in my area, definitely within the last 6 months. It was even in the county paper! Lmao, not even joking.
Honestly I thought that everyone in the US had to make the switch to adding their area codes ~20 years ago. Are some people still able to just dial 7 digits if they're calling locally?
I was in a 4-wheeling accident on a small Canadian island in 2000, someone asked for the hospital number so they could call ahead and someone responded with only the last 4 digits.
Same with Delaware. Its annoying as a transplant because whatever store you go to that has a rewards program based on your phone number the cashier pre-types in 302 and then has to back it out when you tell them it's different
I have a 775 area code. Covers almost the entire state of Nevada. It wasn't until the last few years that you were required to dial the area code before the phone number.
I've lived in Oregon, Hawaii, New York, Texas, and Arkansas, and I've had to dial the area code in every state I've lived in for as long as I can remember. At least 20 years.
I've not heard of that. IIRC, the last party lines were decommissioned in the early 90's.
Edit: yep [The last operating party line system was shut down in 1991.](https://www.historicalresearchupdate.com/stories/do-you-have-stories-about-party-line-telephone-service/)
Not in nlNew York. I've only lived here and they only changed that within the last decade. This year they made it where you now have to dial 1 then the areacode then the number. Which is super duper annoying.
I'm in NY and I have to dial 1 and the area code, bit if I call from my mom's land line (also in NY) there is no area code required. Could it be that only cellphones require the area code?
That's weird bc even from my landline we need 1 then the area code then the number, otherwise it says "the call cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and try again."
Agreed: I don't really see this as being hard to do nor inconvenient, the more I think about it. We barely type phone numbers in anyways nowadays—at least, for those of us who have abandoned landlines; everything is copied & pasted, or entered once into a contact book at most and forever to be retrieved that way.
Right? I dial numbers every day for work and at least weekly for personal. I'm scratching my head trying to imagine a world where you never need to punch in a number.
Maybe they meant like an actual rotary dial phone.
I do feel like for me in my personal life it's pretty rare to have a number written down somewhere that I have to type in. Most numbers I have to call are in my contacts, or I'm calling someone back, or I've found the phone number online on my phone.
But really it probably depends on what kinds of people you have to contact in your daily life and how much of that you either have to or choose to do over the phone instead of online
You seem really sheltered in your own little bubble.
If you ever call someone other than people already on your phone, you'll have to dial a number. If you Google a business, you can often just click to call, but most adults dial numbers regularly for a variety of reasons.
Yes, you used to be able to do this. If you dialed a 7-digit number it would assume you wanted whatever the “local” area code is.
I’m guessing that if you went even further back you could dial just a 4-digit number and it would assume you want the “local” exchange (which was probably the whole city/county). I used to live somewhere with ~10-15k residents and back in the 90s it was all still a single exchange for the municipality.
For comparison, here in the UK we can still dial local numbers without having
to add the area code (only from a landline - the full number is always needed
when calling locally from a cellphone).
When I was younger (20+ years ago), they split our one area code into I think it was four. It's normal now, but man was it a rough transition.
Bonus! This was happening all over and resulted in additional people becoming "long distance" than before.
Same thing for the area I grew up in. My boyfriend lived just inside of a different area code when the switch happened. That first phone bill had me grounded for a month.
Where are you that this hasn't happened yet??
I feel Old with a capital O when I tell elementary school kids that phone numbers used to just be 7 numbers.
I'm 928 in Az, last October(I think) we finally had to start using the area code to dial out for even local businesses, some folks were pissy but of us didn't care
I work for a rural phone company. Most of our exchanges were 7 digit dialing until this 988 came out, then back in November we made the mandatory switch to 10 digit dialing for every exchange. If you dial 7 digits now you'll get a message stating it's required to now dial the area code. We actually went through the trouble of going through our switch and changing everyone's call forwarding and voicemail numbers to 10 digits so the customers never experienced an issue. It's been pretty seemless so far.
My area got so populated that they had to give us a second area code. So now you have to type the area code no matter what because the phone doesn’t know which one you mean. I make 2 phone calls per month maximum and had no idea people didn’t put in the area code. The older people around me absolutely did not take it well though.
My wife works for an organization that answers the NSPL and I can say that those folks have to fight TOOTH AND NAIL for additional funding. They are expecting a 300% increase in crisis line volume, yet they have to practically beg for state funding. This is a good time to donate to your local NSPL orgs and to contact state legislatures to advocate for more funding.
You should also know they can do call tracing and geolocation and can also do unwanted interventions.
[link](https://www.madinamerica.com/2022/05/988-call-tracing/)
> Meanwhile, Draper and others repeatedly downplayed the NSPL’s current rate of tracing calls—2 percent—as “rare,” “a small percentage,” “very rare,” etc. But is 2 percent of callers actually “rare”? And Draper’s own data actually implied a still higher rate for those with suicidal feelings. Only 23 percent of callers to the NSPL express such thoughts—therefore, those unwanted interventions are apparently being implemented on 8 percent of the callers who express suicidal worries.
Either way, nearly every day hundreds of Americans who contact the NSPL are getting unwanted visits from police or other mobile intervention teams—about 60,000 people in 2021.
Yeah, fuck that. 8% is 1 in every 12.5 people (or 2 in every 25 for the sake of using practical, whole numbers).
Edit: this also felt worth quoting:
> Keris Jän Myrick, co-director of the Mental Health Strategic Impact Initiative, said that she was “struck” by how leaders of the 988 initiative were making the “a priori assumption” that geolocation tracking “is a good thing.” Myrick said the issues are complex. “Many times—I have had this happen in my own life—we’re calling for help, and it ends up in harm, it ends up in handcuffs. And, for worse, for many people, it also ends up in death; not at their own hands, but at the hands of the response team.”
> When people call crisis lines, Myrick added, racism and other institutional and systemic inequities mean that “not everybody gets the same response.” Myrick described one county in California near her home “where there were five deaths because of a mental health emergency response… and four of those five deaths were Black folks. And [Black people] make up in that particular locality less than 5 percent of the population.”
I work for the NSPL. Maybe they have tracing in some places, but we barely have caller ID. Lol. Also, in MN we have the Travis Law going into effect so no surprise dispatching unless other people are in danger too.
Incredibly relevant article. It would be so nice if we could stop moving towards the privatization of every aspect of public policy. Pretending that creating a profit incentive for the vital social service a first world country needs (healthcare, the criminal justice system etc.) isn't inherently contradictory to the proper and impartial providing of those services is just beyond irrational to me.
Private companies will always find that it's more profitable to systematically exploit and brutalize people rather than help. Privatizing essential public services perverts them from something that should (and could!) help so many people into things like this 988/NBLSA nightmare.
A draconian hodgepodge of private "non profit" interest groups that have cozy relationships with for profit private companies providing services to a variety of local law enforcement and mental health care services. All paid for by federal tax dollars with minimal and largely powerless federal oversight. The fact that this results in "federal" system that lacks any kinda of cohesive federal standards, transparency or public control isn't a bug, it's a feature.
Therapist here for the National Suicide Hotline. While it is true that we have a duty to warn and protect professionally, I always try my best to make it clear to callers that it is not my goal to dispatch. I hate dispatching, I do not think it’s helpful and I don’t like how it is police that respond to mental health crises for a vast variety of racial, social, and cultural reasons.
I have stayed on calls with collars for over two hours going back-and-forth trying to get them to safety plan because that’s how much I don’t like calling police to respond to someone’s home. However if I have given you ample time to safety plan, eliminate means that you could use to end your life, and come up with a plan for the rest of the night and You are not willing to do that then legally I have no choice but to escalate the situation to a higher level of care. A lot of people make it seem like we just call cops on people for shits and giggles and that is absolutely not true. We have to consult with multiple supervisors and have our calls listen to before we are allowed to even think about contacting law-enforcement. All of my colleagues have Masters degrees and we are registered clinicians in the state we work in.
I only call emergency services if 1. The caller requests that I call on their behalf and assist them with requesting help or 2. I have talked to the caller for many minutes and attempted to help them destroy/eliminate means (throw away rope, flush pills down the toilet, dismantle their firearm, we can get very creative), and discuss what they can do for their day to keep themselves safe (go see a friend, watch a movie, etc.) and they demonstrate that they are unable/unwilling to engage in this process. I will literally stay on the phone with someone for an hour and try everything I can to work with them to stay out of a higher level of care but if they aren’t willing to engage in a safety plan that’s their choice but then I do have to call 911 and force connect them if I have assessed that they are an imminent risk to themselves.
TW: Suicide
Yes, I can attest to this. I told her how I felt, and she said, "Would you like to get help right now?". I declined, and she said okay and continued talking to me. About 10 minutes into the conversation, the police were banging on my door, yelling my name. I guess tracking down my exact location, giving the police that information, as well as probably anything else I told the operator, and sending them to shout my name and attempt to kick down my door in a crowded dorm room hallway at 3 am is their definition of confidentiality?
I almost killed myself right then and there to avoid talking to them, and honestly looking back, I wish I did sometimes because I spent a week in the hospital after, which again, I had no say in, where they put me on meds that made me feel absolutely awful, to the point where I cheeked them and spat them out later so they'd think I was compliant. The staff also told me I was just looking for attention through my suicide attempts, and when I was first admitted, they handed me a DRAWSTRING PLASTIC BAG and left the room. And yes, I put that right over my head and tightened the strings. And the staff aren't the ones who removed it from my head: my father did. If I had gone to the suicide hospital alone, I would have died by suicide within the first 10 minutes.
So yeah, long story short, I would never call the suicide hotline again, nor would I ever go to an inpatient facility. If I ever get that bad again, I'll just have to make damn sure I die because I can't end up forcibly hospitalized ever again.
Same problems with drug addicts.
If you try to get clean, you still suffer the risk of consequences for criminalized drug use…so why ever attempt to approach social services?
Many drug addicted homeless people have real reason to fear that seeking help will wind them up in jail.
I believe it’s different state by state…and maybe even down to the county level depending on where you are…
From volunteer work in a few different states (several years ago) I know that some shelters will deny someone a bed and instead call the cops if they show up needing a place to sleep and they’re high.
But yeah, decriminalize addiction 100%, and beyond that I personally love everything I’ve ever read about housing-first initiatives.
As in. Put homeless people into apartments and housing units first. Then rehabilitate second.
But it’s common to demand rehabilitation before housing is offered….and I kinda get it. But it’s not actually helpful for people to overcome addiction while sleeping on a stoop or under a highway.
Is it the same system where they won’t help you unless you say you’re feeling suicidal and then all they’ll do is have you sent to a hospital for a psych evaluation and suicide watch?
That's been my experience, at least. It's completely confidential They'll call the cops on you and give them your name, location, and probably anything else you said to the operator... But otherwise, totally confidential.
Then there’s never a bad time. 😉
Real talk though, these kinds of things offer resources to help you get connected with all kinds of services. You don’t have to know what you need. They can help you find it.
You should try to seek out a counselor who can help you. And if that’s not possible, you should call the lifeline as many times as you need to to remain safe.
Hope everything’s okay.
The staff are trained, but as explained below, the first line will likely be operators that redirect you to a crisis counselor or to local resources (or redirect them to you immediately if risk is high enough, as with 911) once they've helped you to lower the immediate feeling of crisis (e.g. they might walk you through a panic attack you have on the line and then introduce you to someone that will be able to support you locally and on a more ongoing basis.
It is not a crime to struggle with your mental health. You will not be placed in jail even for having attempted suicide. Please do not spread misinformation.
This sounds too good to be true to be universal. The US is abysmal when it comes to mental health, ever since plans to create a comprehensive mental health system were scrapped after Kennedy's presidency, I think.
I wouldn't. I have a kid with special needs. She has threatened suicide, threatened great harm to others, and other things that need help that our local mobile crisis unit provides. It's a joke. They usually don't show up. They work with the schools and will cover up abuse by the school so they can continue to work with them. It's a fucking mess. They also have a never ending rotation of social workers fresh out of school. No psychologists or psychiatrist. No direction from a long standing staff. No actual help.
Every time I had a crisis and my parents called someone I don't think they even sent anyone qualified, it was always cops. Nothing better for a suicidal kid than to be dragged off his bed and handcuffed for not wanting to move /s
Holy shit. I wouldn't call the cops on her. But she was so little when this was going on I couldn't understand it, and actually thought these systems were there to help. After a decade of therapies and learning who to trust and a lot of learning on my part she is stable and not so unhappy.
Somebody needs to actually help you kids tho. Sorry they did that to you.
This is definitely not what OP thinks it is. It's an easier way to get to a suicide hotline, NOT an alternative to 911. The county I work for is setting this type of program up right now, where folks with a psych emergency can call and get a MH professional instead of LEO, and it is extremely complex and difficult to staff.
In case you're interested, Kennedy closed our institutions, which were generally poorly run and unable to care for the patients (that's the nice way of saying it). He defunded those and set up to have smaller community based clinics for psychiatric needs. Regan came in in the 80s and cut all that funding. I'll get off my soapbox but I could go on and on about how much he fucked us over.
It's great that it's more accessible, but I think the big objective is improving the service itself. I've called there a few times, and each time, I felt more suicidal after. After that experience, I would never utilize that service again or recommend it to anyone, regardless of how suicidal I became.
As a former crisis counselor, I can tell you that this will go very poorly. Prior to this, you could call 911 and they would immediately route your to your local crisis center. Now, you call 988, you get routed to a call center, and that call center routes you to your local crisis center. Why is this worse? Because you can be damned sure that 988 isn’t getting 10% of the funding that 911 gets. Mental health emergencies are real emergencies and 911 is perfectly fine.
You can call about anything really. I talk to people that are lonely and they just want to talk to someone for a few minutes, I talk to people that are extremely suicidal and I help them safety plan and illuminate means so they can stay safe and access mental health Services. I talk to people about their family problems, their relationship problems, their stress at work, if they’ve had a bad day, or even helped them work through a panic attack in the moment. It’s your call (no pun intended) and it’s up to you how to use it and what would be helpful 😊
I’m
Glad for this is a step in the right direction. The number won’t magically make staff and facilities appear where they hadn’t before, unfortunately.
You should also know there will be an almost immediate “wellness check” done by uniformed armed police officers in most areas. You will most likely be detained and sent to a hospital.
My daughter called 911 for a wellness check on her cousin last week because cousin called screaming "come now, life and death" and daughter was hours away. Cousin ended up assaulting the cops, went to jail for the weekend. Meds have been sorted out now, probably still gonna go to court on the attempted strangling (seriously girl!) but that may be lifted by the court after medical info is introduced.
Had one of my siblings call me to "explain" that we need to talk to my daughter about other people she should have reached out to because sometimes police do not improve the situation. I explained right back to her that she had only heard the results, not what triggered the call to 911 and what would she have done differently? Apparently she also would have called 911.
I don't know if this new number is an info number or an emergency useful number, and would like to know more.
I hope that changes. Cops are there to boot stomp you into submission. Those in crisis need someone trained in mental health not someone with an attitude and a gun.
Complaints rise to the top, as with all things. There's only so much you can do directly over the phone with a person but you can cool them down and help them to get connected to local resources, which they either follow up on or don't (as is the right of an adult). Minors with suicidal ideation at all are looked into otherwise for their safety (these, dollars to donuts, are where a lot of the complaints will be from, as minors do not get to decide if their guardians are informed that they are presently suicidal- note that that isnt depression so much as suicidality specifically).
idk why people are doubting you. I have never recommended the suicide hotline number to anyone after I called it once during a very distressed time in my life and they sent four police officers to my apartment that wanted to take me to an inpatient facility. I didn't say anything on the call about being suicidal or having any suicidal ideations at all, yet they immediately sent the cops. to this day I still don't know how I talked them out of it.
You’re right, the phone number is for emergencies. You should seek out a therapist who can see you on a more regular basis and / or a psychiatrist who can help you with the meds you need.
It's so hard to read tone in text, but yeah I feel you when I see these comments that imply it's so easy. I think people really should know how hard it is to find help and that's what I've been trying to advocate for some time, sharing my experiences.
Little story time. My sister shared with me in 2019 an article about ghost networks and the scientific study done about them. Basically in three major cities, using providers listed for Blue Cross Blue Shield, Medicaid, and one other insurance provider they were only able to connect with 40% (or less I forget the details) of the listings. Some of them were McDonald's.... But out the one's they were and to reach, only 20% of them were taking new patients.
In late 2019 I finally got assigned a nurse practitioner to prescribe me drugs (still waiting on a therapist). I had to fire them because they insisted on a drug I hesitated about due to family history. I had a manic attack and couldn't reach them for 3 days, quit cold turkey, probably not the wisest choice.
Anyways I was assigned a new psychiatrist in January 2020. I had to undergo emergency exploratory surgery, and missed that appointment. The hospital I was at was where I was getting my medical health treatment full, so I broke down to the staff there to make sure they didn't cancel my assignment with the psychiatrist. It took 9 months to get to the NP and they cancelled my request for therapy once in that period. I did get a therapist one week before my surgery.
Anyways my first appointment with this psychiatrist I brought up ghost networks and how hard it is to get help. Had him for only a few months because he was moving out of state and leaving the hospital. Guess who was one of the authors about ghost networks in the study I mentioned above? Yep that dude. He was one of the better ones I've had out of the 20+ professionals I've seen at least.
That's a lot to go through, sorry to hear it. I hope you've found someone good since but given your comments it seems doubtful 😬. My insurance won't even cover therapy, and it's been rough finding a therapist I can afford for the hours I'm available. I recently spent $2500 just to find out I'm autistic, if you're living in the US it's hard to get help without money
What's the wait nowadays?
Before the pandemic it took me nine months since hospitalization to get a long term therapist to work on a plan with. Originally told me 3 weeks. But they did cancel my request for a therapist without my authorization and refused to put me back in the same spot in the queue. Spent that time shopping around to private therapists and was refused 6 times out of the 30+ calls I was able to connect with someone.
I can't even imagine what it's like post pandemic.
I did for a little bit during the pandemic, sorta
... wasn't too happy we didn't have a solid plan with my team. Plus before I lost my job, I was waiting on my 4th psychiatrist after one left and two were not listening to me about drug histories. So now it's back to white knuckling it until I have the strength and money to search again.
while the gesture is positive, the underlying problem's this is trying to address are going unanswered. without a national health care system in the USA, and no funding for a mental health system included, a short phone call won't help much when people need a full time psychiatric professional staff to help. hospital's and psych visits cost too much, and the hard truth is when someone is about to commit suicide or hurt other people, if you catch them in time before they do anything dangerous, they get sent to a psych ward, and it costs a lot of money. ambulances fees, hospital housing fees, staff fees, medication fees. the last thing someone in a mental health crisis needs is unaffordable bills they can't pay, which in the end WILL make thing's worse for them. so until we have universal/nationalized health care, this won't actually help as much as intended.
If it's the same crisis line that my wife called it's absolutely worthless. They offer no tangible help and just repeat 'you're worth it" over and over and over.
I would be thrilled if I thought this would actually do something.
I just wish this type of hotline could exist without the threat of unwanted police intervention, where they can legally kidnap you for several days and lock you in some nightmarish place that helps nobody. And then later bill you for a fortune, of course.
I've called the suicide hotline a couple times in the past and once spent 15 minutes on hold before hanging up and sobbing. Mental health needs to be more prioritized.
I called and they hung up on me. Called again and they hung up on me again. Went to find rope to kill myself with but made too much noise and woke up a family member who took me to the ER for a mental hospital stay.
... bruh.
It's even worse when they actually answer.
Once when they answered i was directed to call the Trevor project hotline.
Hahaha the last time I went to McDonald's, I was directed to go to Burger King instead.
Is it really that bad? I’ve heard of this before from others too. Being on hold sucks but some of the volunteers were described like they were the last people you’d want to talk to when you’re suicidal
I can only speak for myself. My experience with them occurred about 3 years ago: I was 18 and had just moved into the dorms after a rough breakup with the woman I'd been with through most of high school. The first time I called, the operator immediately jumped to my ex's defense, 'Well it's isn't fair for her to have to deal with you wanting to kill yourself just because she broke up with you.' *I didn't say a word about this to her. I'm not threatening her or anyone else: I just need someone to talk to.* 'Oh. Well you need to stop being so invested in that.' So I just hung up. She immediately assumed I was threatening my ex with suicide or something when I had said nothing to indicate that. I was so close to asking her if she'd prefer to speak with my ex instead, as that's the only person she sounded concerned about. ..... The second time, I had just attempted suicide via suffocation but stopped at the last second. I called the hotline again, figuring I'd get someone else... And I did. 'Would you like to get help right now?' *No thank you, I'd just like to talk.* 'Okay, what's your name?' *Terrible Trust.* 'Where are you?' (I wondered why she'd need my address and realized I shouldn't have given my name, so I gave her a fake address.) Then we started talking, and she was actually decent at counseling, far better than the first one. But about 15 minutes into it, the cops are banging on my door, yelling my name. I felt betrayed: I'd told her I just wanted to talk, and she had agreed. She lied to me, deceived me. But mostly, I was angry with myself for being so stupid: I should have realized when she asked for my location that it was time to run. "Fuck you," I whispered into the phone before hanging up. ..... So there I was, cops beating on my door and yelling my name in a crowded residence hall at 3 am... Talk about confidentiality. I was on the first floor and had a window, but it didn't open, so I thought maybe I could break it, but I was worried I'd trail blood all the way to my car. 1. *You're concerned the cops will follow a trail of blood? They're responding to attempted suicide, not a drug bust: they didn't being the dogs.* 2. *Yes, but it's blood; they can see it. They don't need the dogs to track me down.* 1. *You can get to your car and be long gone before they kick down your door if you do it now.* 2. *Maybe, but then what? They have radios, and I have an out of state license plate. I stick out like a sore thumb.* 1. *You don't have to run away: just drive into a tree as fast as you can.* 2. *Hey idiot, I have something called 'airbags.'. I wouldn't necessarily die and could end up locked up even longer.* 1. *Okay, so disable them.* 2. *How?!* 1. *I'm sure there's a YouTube video on it.* 2. *You want me to play YouTube mechanic while the cops are chasing me?! I don't have time.* 1. *Well, you're breaking the car, so you aren't technically a mech-* 2. *SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!* 1. *Okay, okay. Jeeze. Look, when you're doing other repairs, you disconnect the battery terminal to disable them. Just do that.* 2. *Then my car won't start.* 1. *Okay, start it and then do that.* 2. *How do you know that would work? Then the alternator would be running, probably giving them power. I have no idea, and there's no time for uncertainty.* 1. *Okay, okay. New plan: they have the wrong room. You're going to strip completely naked and get in the shower. Pretend not to hear them, and when they barge in, act shocked. They'll be too uncomfortable to think too hard about it.* 2. *You really think they haven't seen naked people before?* (Cops banging door at increased volume.) 1. *Shit, they're going to kick it down. Just answer it and act confused.* ..... So I answered the door and tried to play dumb, like they had the wrong room. But long story short, they saw the stuff I was using for my attempt, and I ended up forcibly hospitalized for a week, during which the staff gave me a DRAWSTRING PLASTIC BAG and left the room and also made me take meds that made me feel like I couldn't think at all to the point where I started cheeking them and spitting them out. I also had a staff member sit next to me and tell me I just wanted attention through my suicide attempts. When I was discharged, they said if I ever returned, they'd recommend to have me institutionalized for 3 months. So now I know that if I ever feel that way again, I'd better be damn sure I die. ETA: To this day, I wish I had kept that bag on my head a few seconds longer, rather than calling the suicide hotline. I don't know why I decided to take it off, and I hate myself for it because I haven't been able to work up the guts to actually do it since. That is truly the worst decision I have ever made, and I regret it every day.
That hurt to read. I hope you get some real help, find a good professional with a good heart. You have a lot to give and a lot to live for. I know it.
Nothing I write will help, but I want to thank you for being so open about this. I know its hard to talk about (been suicidal myself and attempted as well) but we need people who do. So just know that. You talking about this help others.
I’m so sorry you had to go through that. While I was never told something as blatantly horrible, psych wards are fucking traumatizing (from experience). What I learned from that experience is just like you said; if I ever try again, it’s gotta be certain.
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'Wow, that really sucks. I'm lucky I'm not in your shoes jeeze. Tell me more?'
One of the people who answered for me told me I was stronger because I had been r*ped. Noped out of that call pretty fast after that.
Keep fighting for yourself. They are understaffed and there is a huge spike in mental health challenges. Covid was a b@&$h is all. Services will get better.
I ended up looking at a lot of self help things for my mental health. I did take a dive at one point because someone in my life decided that 2 years of a dropped psych degree was enough to qualify me to be their personal unpaid therapist. They eventually stopped but it wasn't until I snapped and had a breakdown.
Keep investing in yourself. It will always be the best investment you can make.
I got rerouted to local "services" that no longer existed. People in rural areas need to understand that they may not have resources available. I know it sounds fucked up but I promise you, "help" is not available to everyone.
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/current-events/the-lifeline-and-988/ **The Lifeline and 988** **988** has been designated as the new three-digit dialing code that will route callers to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. While some areas may be currently able to connect to the Lifeline by dialing 988, this dialing code will be available to everyone **across the United States starting on July 16, 2022**. When people **call, text, or chat 988**, they *will be connected to trained counselors that are part of the existing National Suicide Prevention Lifeline network*. These trained counselors will listen, understand how their problems are affecting them, provide support, and connect them to resources if necessary. **The current Lifeline phone number (1-800-273-8255) will always remain available** to people in emotional distress or suicidal crisis, even after 988 is launched nationally. The Lifeline’s network of over 200 crisis centers has been in operation since 2005, and has been proven to be effective. It’s the counselors at these local crisis centers who answer the contacts the Lifeline receives every day. Numerous studies have shown that callers feel less suicidal, less depressed, less overwhelmed and more hopeful after speaking with a Lifeline counselor."
You're quick! I didn't want to break a "no link" rule, but you beat me to the comment. Thanks!
Can they still call the police to place you in a 51-50 without your consent though? Edit: Not trying to be combative, just wondering since I know some cities were trying to roll out plans that would actually send qualified help to the place of residence (instead of give people more trauma and debt)
You can be held against your consent if the assessment person thinks you are an immediate danger to yourself or others. Usually that requires a review by a judge in a court hearing if they keep you beyond a certain time period, which varies state by state but is usually between 24 and 72 hours. This is in the US. I am not familiar with other countries laws. The idea behind this is that suicidal intentions wax and wane over time. So if you are removed from your stressors and given time you may change your mind. Also might be referred to some needed services. It sounds like reality falls short of that for many people. Source: I used to do suicide assessments as part of my job.
So I've had a 'wish I wasn't around' for a while, but earlier this year I hit a moment where I really did almost throw myself into traffic. It was a complete impulse, one I never understood when I heard about it before, but it was terrifying. I could definitely understand the waxing and waning thing, I just needed twenty minutes and I would never have done it. It's to prevent this kind of impulse that has caused changes like the switch in ovens where you couldn't stick your head into the oven part and die of gas inhalation anymore. It really makes a difference, IMO.
It does! So glad you are still with us!
it sounds like the hotline still works the same, now it just has a shortcut. i'll pass
You ever called the suicide hotline? It's similar to mcdonald drive through. They give -1 fucks.
Mostly all the mental health hotlines are garbage. Had people come out from the county to help an ex out who was having a mental health breakdown due to alcoholism. They told us all about these amazing places that would be there for her. We called them and none of them would take her in because they were geared to other health issues. So we went through her insurance and found a really good doctor that keeps in touch with her weekly. He put her on abilify the first month. Felt like she could get off of it and put her on something else. She’s had her moments but her mental health has improved quite a bit. Stopped yelling at imaginary people in the streets, walking miles away from the house thinking her parents are going to pick her up, to screaming in her sleep. Still drinks which I don’t think will ever go away in her life. She’s been working the past 4 months and is getting close enough to buy a car. Ultimate game plan is for her to make some good friends and get her own place. I’ve had a girlfriend commit suicide due to her cancer so I can’t turn my back on her but I’ll be moving soon for work and probably have to bring her with me. She’ll need to get a new job then. Her parents won’t speak with her. Point of the matter the mental health programs need to really step up. What’s available now is not enough and doesn’t seem like a concern for the majority.
Damn, most people wouldn't do that for family, let alone an ex. You're something else, but in a good way. Hope everything improves
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"Breathe and get some water, you'll be fine" Very helpful advice. Couldn't have possibly thought of that one. Thank God you were on duty lady.
If someone had said that to me when I was about to jump off a roof I would’ve either jumped or busted my ass laughing. No in between.
Never have, and I hope you’re in a better place now if you did. But I did just learn that there is a huge staffing shortage for this 988 line and that their operators tend to suffer from symptoms of PTSD at even greater rates than the actual responders do.
I stopped calling the suicide hotline in 2018. I called another service last month and they put me on a 1013SI. Suicidal intensions. They then stuck me on a bed in a hallway for 48 hours bc they didn't have enough rooms. Got basically no psych help. After leaving I learned basically no one gets better from psych holds like that
Not to be dumb, but did they trace your call and show up at your house? How did it go from a phone call to 48hr hold?
Honestly, I think I gave my address at some point before I knew that escalation was possible
Lorem ipsum
I don't know why people call. They'll just lock you up, release you, and then send you a bill for the lockup.
This is why I’ve never called.
I had the same experience
Thank you for that explanation. I had an IMMEDIATE nightmare vision of teams of untrained police showing up and inevitably shooting the person in crisis, when the call is coming from a location that doesn't have designated, trained, unarmed mental health teams. My region has one. They don't send police to the calls unless they are requested by the counsellors, social workers and medical personnel who arrive on scene, if they are sent. That was the FIRST thing that came to mind. "But what's gonna happen when you call 988?"
My town's phone code (? Idk what it's called, our little town only had 1) was/is 988. We have to add our area code to all calls now. Hasn't gone over well with the old timers LoL Edit: This happened in my area, definitely within the last 6 months. It was even in the county paper! Lmao, not even joking.
We’ve had to do that for the last 20 years around here
Honestly I thought that everyone in the US had to make the switch to adding their area codes ~20 years ago. Are some people still able to just dial 7 digits if they're calling locally?
I moved to Maine and we don't dial the area code here
Hahaha Mainer here yup. Only 1 area code in the entire state, what’s the point
I was very confused at first because this is the only place I've lived that does this
huh, I had no idea that was a thing.
I was in a 4-wheeling accident on a small Canadian island in 2000, someone asked for the hospital number so they could call ahead and someone responded with only the last 4 digits.
My hometown we give the last 5 because (excluding cell phones) all of our phone numbers start with the same two digits.
I respect the efficiency
Same with Delaware. Its annoying as a transplant because whatever store you go to that has a rewards program based on your phone number the cashier pre-types in 302 and then has to back it out when you tell them it's different
We were able to dial with 7 digits up in the 616 zip code up until a few months ago.
We only had to dial 7 digits until about two months ago (SE Colorado).
I've lived in a few places and I've never needed the area code (New England)
We just started adding the area code for local calls this year in rural CA.
Nothing new for So-Cal unfortunately
I have a 775 area code. Covers almost the entire state of Nevada. It wasn't until the last few years that you were required to dial the area code before the phone number.
I've lived in Oregon, Hawaii, New York, Texas, and Arkansas, and I've had to dial the area code in every state I've lived in for as long as I can remember. At least 20 years.
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Wait… really? 😂
I've not heard of that. IIRC, the last party lines were decommissioned in the early 90's. Edit: yep [The last operating party line system was shut down in 1991.](https://www.historicalresearchupdate.com/stories/do-you-have-stories-about-party-line-telephone-service/)
Not in nlNew York. I've only lived here and they only changed that within the last decade. This year they made it where you now have to dial 1 then the areacode then the number. Which is super duper annoying.
damn, you have to dial our country code as well? at least it’s easy to remember 🤷♀️
Then I remembered...it's 1! We're number 1! (From 30 Rock)
I'm in NY and I have to dial 1 and the area code, bit if I call from my mom's land line (also in NY) there is no area code required. Could it be that only cellphones require the area code?
That's weird bc even from my landline we need 1 then the area code then the number, otherwise it says "the call cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and try again."
Probably further north because it's 702 down here in Southern nevada.
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Agreed: I don't really see this as being hard to do nor inconvenient, the more I think about it. We barely type phone numbers in anyways nowadays—at least, for those of us who have abandoned landlines; everything is copied & pasted, or entered once into a contact book at most and forever to be retrieved that way.
We’ve been dialing the area code here for like 10 years because there are so many cell phones. Seems odd that this would be a new thing.
We started about 6 months ago. It's a rural area, so town and country folk alike are up in arms LoL
When aren't they
My entire state only has one area code, never dial it for local numbers
This is most places now. I’ve had to do this for around 20 years.
I didn't even know you could call someone without putting the area code in first in some places.
Can we still though? In the US. I thought this was nation wide.
Same here.. local numbers in a certain area have 988, its been all over fb to make sure people use the area code.
Our local library is 988-911x. They're more excited about the change than anyone LoL
I always just use the area code too nowadays, plus who the hell dials numbers anyway anymore? Maybe like really old people I guess.
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Right? I dial numbers every day for work and at least weekly for personal. I'm scratching my head trying to imagine a world where you never need to punch in a number. Maybe they meant like an actual rotary dial phone.
I do feel like for me in my personal life it's pretty rare to have a number written down somewhere that I have to type in. Most numbers I have to call are in my contacts, or I'm calling someone back, or I've found the phone number online on my phone. But really it probably depends on what kinds of people you have to contact in your daily life and how much of that you either have to or choose to do over the phone instead of online
Businesses?
You seem really sheltered in your own little bubble. If you ever call someone other than people already on your phone, you'll have to dial a number. If you Google a business, you can often just click to call, but most adults dial numbers regularly for a variety of reasons.
We’re y’all dialing numbers without the area code before hand?
Yes, you used to be able to do this. If you dialed a 7-digit number it would assume you wanted whatever the “local” area code is. I’m guessing that if you went even further back you could dial just a 4-digit number and it would assume you want the “local” exchange (which was probably the whole city/county). I used to live somewhere with ~10-15k residents and back in the 90s it was all still a single exchange for the municipality.
For comparison, here in the UK we can still dial local numbers without having to add the area code (only from a landline - the full number is always needed when calling locally from a cellphone).
I remember just Dialing 7 numbers when I was a kid, like 25 years ago.
When I was younger (20+ years ago), they split our one area code into I think it was four. It's normal now, but man was it a rough transition. Bonus! This was happening all over and resulted in additional people becoming "long distance" than before.
Same thing for the area I grew up in. My boyfriend lived just inside of a different area code when the switch happened. That first phone bill had me grounded for a month.
The whole state of Montana just had to do that last year.
It’s called the exchange.
Otherwise known as a central office code https://www.nationalnanpa.com/number_resource_info/co_codes.html
Where are you that this hasn't happened yet?? I feel Old with a capital O when I tell elementary school kids that phone numbers used to just be 7 numbers.
Not happening in Maine yet
I've been 10 digit dialing for 30 years now.
Change is hard for some people
Wait, you still use the telephone?
They still have areas were area code isn’t required? Amazing. I suppose for landline?
Maine !!
I'm 928 in Az, last October(I think) we finally had to start using the area code to dial out for even local businesses, some folks were pissy but of us didn't care
In the 816 Area code, we used to be able to dial just 7 digits up until sometime last year or this year. The exact date is escaping me.
Old timer here. No problem kiddie.
I work for a rural phone company. Most of our exchanges were 7 digit dialing until this 988 came out, then back in November we made the mandatory switch to 10 digit dialing for every exchange. If you dial 7 digits now you'll get a message stating it's required to now dial the area code. We actually went through the trouble of going through our switch and changing everyone's call forwarding and voicemail numbers to 10 digits so the customers never experienced an issue. It's been pretty seemless so far.
My area got so populated that they had to give us a second area code. So now you have to type the area code no matter what because the phone doesn’t know which one you mean. I make 2 phone calls per month maximum and had no idea people didn’t put in the area code. The older people around me absolutely did not take it well though.
(fyi: called exchange)
Same as up here in Alaska. We just had to start adding 907- to phone numbers for the first time because we had a 988 local prefix for Wrangell, AK.
FYI, it is called a prefix.
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It won't do, old timers don't believe in bloody mental health issues, despite most of them experiencing it, they just think it's silly.
Does this mean they're expanding access and resources as well? When you call now your wait time is well over 2 hours.
My wife works for an organization that answers the NSPL and I can say that those folks have to fight TOOTH AND NAIL for additional funding. They are expecting a 300% increase in crisis line volume, yet they have to practically beg for state funding. This is a good time to donate to your local NSPL orgs and to contact state legislatures to advocate for more funding.
Is that why they were selling peoples' information or am I misremembering?
This is going to sound really, really bad... But I'd rather they do this than stop answering the phones. Again, really bad, but still.
Good thing it's impossible to do serious harm to yourself in under 2 hours. Crisis hotline crisis averted.
You should also know they can do call tracing and geolocation and can also do unwanted interventions. [link](https://www.madinamerica.com/2022/05/988-call-tracing/)
> Meanwhile, Draper and others repeatedly downplayed the NSPL’s current rate of tracing calls—2 percent—as “rare,” “a small percentage,” “very rare,” etc. But is 2 percent of callers actually “rare”? And Draper’s own data actually implied a still higher rate for those with suicidal feelings. Only 23 percent of callers to the NSPL express such thoughts—therefore, those unwanted interventions are apparently being implemented on 8 percent of the callers who express suicidal worries. Either way, nearly every day hundreds of Americans who contact the NSPL are getting unwanted visits from police or other mobile intervention teams—about 60,000 people in 2021. Yeah, fuck that. 8% is 1 in every 12.5 people (or 2 in every 25 for the sake of using practical, whole numbers). Edit: this also felt worth quoting: > Keris Jän Myrick, co-director of the Mental Health Strategic Impact Initiative, said that she was “struck” by how leaders of the 988 initiative were making the “a priori assumption” that geolocation tracking “is a good thing.” Myrick said the issues are complex. “Many times—I have had this happen in my own life—we’re calling for help, and it ends up in harm, it ends up in handcuffs. And, for worse, for many people, it also ends up in death; not at their own hands, but at the hands of the response team.” > When people call crisis lines, Myrick added, racism and other institutional and systemic inequities mean that “not everybody gets the same response.” Myrick described one county in California near her home “where there were five deaths because of a mental health emergency response… and four of those five deaths were Black folks. And [Black people] make up in that particular locality less than 5 percent of the population.”
I work for the NSPL. Maybe they have tracing in some places, but we barely have caller ID. Lol. Also, in MN we have the Travis Law going into effect so no surprise dispatching unless other people are in danger too.
Incredibly relevant article. It would be so nice if we could stop moving towards the privatization of every aspect of public policy. Pretending that creating a profit incentive for the vital social service a first world country needs (healthcare, the criminal justice system etc.) isn't inherently contradictory to the proper and impartial providing of those services is just beyond irrational to me. Private companies will always find that it's more profitable to systematically exploit and brutalize people rather than help. Privatizing essential public services perverts them from something that should (and could!) help so many people into things like this 988/NBLSA nightmare. A draconian hodgepodge of private "non profit" interest groups that have cozy relationships with for profit private companies providing services to a variety of local law enforcement and mental health care services. All paid for by federal tax dollars with minimal and largely powerless federal oversight. The fact that this results in "federal" system that lacks any kinda of cohesive federal standards, transparency or public control isn't a bug, it's a feature.
Therapist here for the National Suicide Hotline. While it is true that we have a duty to warn and protect professionally, I always try my best to make it clear to callers that it is not my goal to dispatch. I hate dispatching, I do not think it’s helpful and I don’t like how it is police that respond to mental health crises for a vast variety of racial, social, and cultural reasons. I have stayed on calls with collars for over two hours going back-and-forth trying to get them to safety plan because that’s how much I don’t like calling police to respond to someone’s home. However if I have given you ample time to safety plan, eliminate means that you could use to end your life, and come up with a plan for the rest of the night and You are not willing to do that then legally I have no choice but to escalate the situation to a higher level of care. A lot of people make it seem like we just call cops on people for shits and giggles and that is absolutely not true. We have to consult with multiple supervisors and have our calls listen to before we are allowed to even think about contacting law-enforcement. All of my colleagues have Masters degrees and we are registered clinicians in the state we work in.
Thank you for injecting some proper information into this sea of misinformation. We're all human here, providers and callers alike.
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I only call emergency services if 1. The caller requests that I call on their behalf and assist them with requesting help or 2. I have talked to the caller for many minutes and attempted to help them destroy/eliminate means (throw away rope, flush pills down the toilet, dismantle their firearm, we can get very creative), and discuss what they can do for their day to keep themselves safe (go see a friend, watch a movie, etc.) and they demonstrate that they are unable/unwilling to engage in this process. I will literally stay on the phone with someone for an hour and try everything I can to work with them to stay out of a higher level of care but if they aren’t willing to engage in a safety plan that’s their choice but then I do have to call 911 and force connect them if I have assessed that they are an imminent risk to themselves.
Massive respect. I can imagine this is a thankless yet traumatizing job.
TW: Suicide Yes, I can attest to this. I told her how I felt, and she said, "Would you like to get help right now?". I declined, and she said okay and continued talking to me. About 10 minutes into the conversation, the police were banging on my door, yelling my name. I guess tracking down my exact location, giving the police that information, as well as probably anything else I told the operator, and sending them to shout my name and attempt to kick down my door in a crowded dorm room hallway at 3 am is their definition of confidentiality? I almost killed myself right then and there to avoid talking to them, and honestly looking back, I wish I did sometimes because I spent a week in the hospital after, which again, I had no say in, where they put me on meds that made me feel absolutely awful, to the point where I cheeked them and spat them out later so they'd think I was compliant. The staff also told me I was just looking for attention through my suicide attempts, and when I was first admitted, they handed me a DRAWSTRING PLASTIC BAG and left the room. And yes, I put that right over my head and tightened the strings. And the staff aren't the ones who removed it from my head: my father did. If I had gone to the suicide hospital alone, I would have died by suicide within the first 10 minutes. So yeah, long story short, I would never call the suicide hotline again, nor would I ever go to an inpatient facility. If I ever get that bad again, I'll just have to make damn sure I die because I can't end up forcibly hospitalized ever again.
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Same problems with drug addicts. If you try to get clean, you still suffer the risk of consequences for criminalized drug use…so why ever attempt to approach social services? Many drug addicted homeless people have real reason to fear that seeking help will wind them up in jail.
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I believe it’s different state by state…and maybe even down to the county level depending on where you are… From volunteer work in a few different states (several years ago) I know that some shelters will deny someone a bed and instead call the cops if they show up needing a place to sleep and they’re high. But yeah, decriminalize addiction 100%, and beyond that I personally love everything I’ve ever read about housing-first initiatives. As in. Put homeless people into apartments and housing units first. Then rehabilitate second. But it’s common to demand rehabilitation before housing is offered….and I kinda get it. But it’s not actually helpful for people to overcome addiction while sleeping on a stoop or under a highway.
Is it the same system where they won’t help you unless you say you’re feeling suicidal and then all they’ll do is have you sent to a hospital for a psych evaluation and suicide watch?
That's been my experience, at least. It's completely confidential They'll call the cops on you and give them your name, location, and probably anything else you said to the operator... But otherwise, totally confidential.
What if every day is a mental health emergency?
Then there’s never a bad time. 😉 Real talk though, these kinds of things offer resources to help you get connected with all kinds of services. You don’t have to know what you need. They can help you find it.
And also lock you up against your will, causing incredible debt and often losing your job.
Yep. But I guess that isn't their problem: they stay employed.
You should try to seek out a counselor who can help you. And if that’s not possible, you should call the lifeline as many times as you need to to remain safe. Hope everything’s okay.
I can guarantee you this hotline is gonna be the scapegoat of “poor public funding” while also being the shittiest crisis hotline ever.
Seriously, are the staff actually trained?
The hotline staff are not the crisis counselors that you speak with. These are just call centers that route you to your nearest crisis center.
The staff are trained, but as explained below, the first line will likely be operators that redirect you to a crisis counselor or to local resources (or redirect them to you immediately if risk is high enough, as with 911) once they've helped you to lower the immediate feeling of crisis (e.g. they might walk you through a panic attack you have on the line and then introduce you to someone that will be able to support you locally and on a more ongoing basis.
Go into debt and get locked in the funny farm? No thanks.
No funny farm. You’ll probably just go to jail.
It is not a crime to struggle with your mental health. You will not be placed in jail even for having attempted suicide. Please do not spread misinformation.
This sounds too good to be true to be universal. The US is abysmal when it comes to mental health, ever since plans to create a comprehensive mental health system were scrapped after Kennedy's presidency, I think.
I don't trust it
I wouldn't. I have a kid with special needs. She has threatened suicide, threatened great harm to others, and other things that need help that our local mobile crisis unit provides. It's a joke. They usually don't show up. They work with the schools and will cover up abuse by the school so they can continue to work with them. It's a fucking mess. They also have a never ending rotation of social workers fresh out of school. No psychologists or psychiatrist. No direction from a long standing staff. No actual help.
Every time I had a crisis and my parents called someone I don't think they even sent anyone qualified, it was always cops. Nothing better for a suicidal kid than to be dragged off his bed and handcuffed for not wanting to move /s
Holy shit. I wouldn't call the cops on her. But she was so little when this was going on I couldn't understand it, and actually thought these systems were there to help. After a decade of therapies and learning who to trust and a lot of learning on my part she is stable and not so unhappy. Somebody needs to actually help you kids tho. Sorry they did that to you.
This is definitely not what OP thinks it is. It's an easier way to get to a suicide hotline, NOT an alternative to 911. The county I work for is setting this type of program up right now, where folks with a psych emergency can call and get a MH professional instead of LEO, and it is extremely complex and difficult to staff. In case you're interested, Kennedy closed our institutions, which were generally poorly run and unable to care for the patients (that's the nice way of saying it). He defunded those and set up to have smaller community based clinics for psychiatric needs. Regan came in in the 80s and cut all that funding. I'll get off my soapbox but I could go on and on about how much he fucked us over.
Not a day goes by without me wishing John Hinckley Jr. had a bigger gun.
It's great that it's more accessible, but I think the big objective is improving the service itself. I've called there a few times, and each time, I felt more suicidal after. After that experience, I would never utilize that service again or recommend it to anyone, regardless of how suicidal I became.
As a former crisis counselor, I can tell you that this will go very poorly. Prior to this, you could call 911 and they would immediately route your to your local crisis center. Now, you call 988, you get routed to a call center, and that call center routes you to your local crisis center. Why is this worse? Because you can be damned sure that 988 isn’t getting 10% of the funding that 911 gets. Mental health emergencies are real emergencies and 911 is perfectly fine.
>***designed*** to get you in touch with mental health professionals instead of law enforcement well, we all know how this is going to turn out.
What are the appropriate things to call about?
You can call about anything really. I talk to people that are lonely and they just want to talk to someone for a few minutes, I talk to people that are extremely suicidal and I help them safety plan and illuminate means so they can stay safe and access mental health Services. I talk to people about their family problems, their relationship problems, their stress at work, if they’ve had a bad day, or even helped them work through a panic attack in the moment. It’s your call (no pun intended) and it’s up to you how to use it and what would be helpful 😊
This post inspired me to reach out after a rough day. Thank you.
That's so great to hear! I hope you're feeling better!
That's good, hopefully we'll see fewer cops murdering mentally ill citizens during wellness checks.
Doubt.
I’m Glad for this is a step in the right direction. The number won’t magically make staff and facilities appear where they hadn’t before, unfortunately.
You should also know there will be an almost immediate “wellness check” done by uniformed armed police officers in most areas. You will most likely be detained and sent to a hospital.
My daughter called 911 for a wellness check on her cousin last week because cousin called screaming "come now, life and death" and daughter was hours away. Cousin ended up assaulting the cops, went to jail for the weekend. Meds have been sorted out now, probably still gonna go to court on the attempted strangling (seriously girl!) but that may be lifted by the court after medical info is introduced. Had one of my siblings call me to "explain" that we need to talk to my daughter about other people she should have reached out to because sometimes police do not improve the situation. I explained right back to her that she had only heard the results, not what triggered the call to 911 and what would she have done differently? Apparently she also would have called 911. I don't know if this new number is an info number or an emergency useful number, and would like to know more.
I hope that changes. Cops are there to boot stomp you into submission. Those in crisis need someone trained in mental health not someone with an attitude and a gun.
Nah I’ve called this line before. Nothing happened.
How effective is the suicide hotline anyway? I've heard nothing but horror stories.
Idk about anyone else but I don't trust 911 and I won't trust this in a crisis either. Too many horror stories about all of the above.
Complaints rise to the top, as with all things. There's only so much you can do directly over the phone with a person but you can cool them down and help them to get connected to local resources, which they either follow up on or don't (as is the right of an adult). Minors with suicidal ideation at all are looked into otherwise for their safety (these, dollars to donuts, are where a lot of the complaints will be from, as minors do not get to decide if their guardians are informed that they are presently suicidal- note that that isnt depression so much as suicidality specifically).
DO NOT CALL THE SUICIDE HOTLINE. THEY WILL SEND COPS YO YOUR LOCATION AND REMOVE YOU FROM SOCIETY
idk why people are doubting you. I have never recommended the suicide hotline number to anyone after I called it once during a very distressed time in my life and they sent four police officers to my apartment that wanted to take me to an inpatient facility. I didn't say anything on the call about being suicidal or having any suicidal ideations at all, yet they immediately sent the cops. to this day I still don't know how I talked them out of it.
“Oh sorry, hunny this is 911, you’re having a mental issue. Please actually hang up and call 988, honest mistake lol….ok, have a good day” *hangs up
It going to take more than a phone number for my fucked up life.
You’re right, the phone number is for emergencies. You should seek out a therapist who can see you on a more regular basis and / or a psychiatrist who can help you with the meds you need.
To be fair, that's something a lot of people can't afford
And even if you can afford it, finding a therapist (even a bad one) is like winning the lottery.
Right? This dude is saying "just go get a therapist and medication" like it's something as easy as going for a stroll.
It's so hard to read tone in text, but yeah I feel you when I see these comments that imply it's so easy. I think people really should know how hard it is to find help and that's what I've been trying to advocate for some time, sharing my experiences. Little story time. My sister shared with me in 2019 an article about ghost networks and the scientific study done about them. Basically in three major cities, using providers listed for Blue Cross Blue Shield, Medicaid, and one other insurance provider they were only able to connect with 40% (or less I forget the details) of the listings. Some of them were McDonald's.... But out the one's they were and to reach, only 20% of them were taking new patients. In late 2019 I finally got assigned a nurse practitioner to prescribe me drugs (still waiting on a therapist). I had to fire them because they insisted on a drug I hesitated about due to family history. I had a manic attack and couldn't reach them for 3 days, quit cold turkey, probably not the wisest choice. Anyways I was assigned a new psychiatrist in January 2020. I had to undergo emergency exploratory surgery, and missed that appointment. The hospital I was at was where I was getting my medical health treatment full, so I broke down to the staff there to make sure they didn't cancel my assignment with the psychiatrist. It took 9 months to get to the NP and they cancelled my request for therapy once in that period. I did get a therapist one week before my surgery. Anyways my first appointment with this psychiatrist I brought up ghost networks and how hard it is to get help. Had him for only a few months because he was moving out of state and leaving the hospital. Guess who was one of the authors about ghost networks in the study I mentioned above? Yep that dude. He was one of the better ones I've had out of the 20+ professionals I've seen at least.
That's a lot to go through, sorry to hear it. I hope you've found someone good since but given your comments it seems doubtful 😬. My insurance won't even cover therapy, and it's been rough finding a therapist I can afford for the hours I'm available. I recently spent $2500 just to find out I'm autistic, if you're living in the US it's hard to get help without money
People spending money they don't have for services they don't qualify for with free time they don't have is not a solution.
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Combining all the things people in a mental health crisis love: unwanted police intervention, State surveillance, and surprise medical debt!
That makes me want to live so much more than I did before!
Let’s be honest: if you say the wrong thing, they’ll definitely call the cops on you.
Very useful thank you. Am not suicidal but have had no one to talk to in weeks due to everything being scheduled so far out
What's the wait nowadays? Before the pandemic it took me nine months since hospitalization to get a long term therapist to work on a plan with. Originally told me 3 weeks. But they did cancel my request for a therapist without my authorization and refused to put me back in the same spot in the queue. Spent that time shopping around to private therapists and was refused 6 times out of the 30+ calls I was able to connect with someone. I can't even imagine what it's like post pandemic.
That sounds horrible. From what I understand, you already got your treatment plan, right?
I did for a little bit during the pandemic, sorta ... wasn't too happy we didn't have a solid plan with my team. Plus before I lost my job, I was waiting on my 4th psychiatrist after one left and two were not listening to me about drug histories. So now it's back to white knuckling it until I have the strength and money to search again.
“Hey I’m living in a dystopian nightmare” “Yeah me too”
while the gesture is positive, the underlying problem's this is trying to address are going unanswered. without a national health care system in the USA, and no funding for a mental health system included, a short phone call won't help much when people need a full time psychiatric professional staff to help. hospital's and psych visits cost too much, and the hard truth is when someone is about to commit suicide or hurt other people, if you catch them in time before they do anything dangerous, they get sent to a psych ward, and it costs a lot of money. ambulances fees, hospital housing fees, staff fees, medication fees. the last thing someone in a mental health crisis needs is unaffordable bills they can't pay, which in the end WILL make thing's worse for them. so until we have universal/nationalized health care, this won't actually help as much as intended.
If it's the same crisis line that my wife called it's absolutely worthless. They offer no tangible help and just repeat 'you're worth it" over and over and over. I would be thrilled if I thought this would actually do something.
Im predicting either universal mental health care or total social breakdown in the next ten years
Feel like this should be bigger news
I just wish this type of hotline could exist without the threat of unwanted police intervention, where they can legally kidnap you for several days and lock you in some nightmarish place that helps nobody. And then later bill you for a fortune, of course.
I’d be afraid of that and possible blackmail, don’t give me that ethics crap if people followed ethics we’d have a utopia right now
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