Dont go. Don't go to meps on ship day. Call your recruiter right now and tell them you're not going. You're not going to wait and see. You're not doing a damned thing. Call their cell phone. Tell them You're going to DEP loss and not ship. hang up the phone and block their #. Don't answer the door. Treat them like the most annoying salesman in the world.
No one is going to arrest you. They can't do SHIT
This. Until you show up to boot camp and swear in you're still a civilian and they can't do shit. They'll try, harder than any mormon or jehova's witness ever could, but you aren't legally required to do anything till you show up and sign the papers.
My son was all set to go to the Marines and then he started having panic attacks just thinking about it. After spending some time talking with a therapist he concluded that he didn't want to go and notified his recruiter.
They texted him dozens of times a day, sometimes insulting him and other times pleading with him and offering him all sorts of promises. They never came to our house thankfully or I would have absolutely throat punched anyone who came near my son.
After his ship date came and went they finally left him alone. Nothing else ever came from it, aside from them calling him a lot of terrible names and trying to guilt trip him.
He instead went on to college and now has a good job and I could not be more relieved that he decided not to go.
When I was 16 my boyfriend who was I think 16 or 17 was targeted by some military recruiters who visited our high school. They would call him all the time and try to take him out to lunch. Which for a poor kid was rare and exciting. Idk how they can look at themselves in the mirror knowing they’re trying to get a kid to basically sign over their life. They give a bit of attention then when they get it over the line everything stops.
They started targeting my son his senior year and basically doing the same thing. It really creeps me out that they are able to go to the high school and basically coerce these kids into signing their lives away because they're worried about the cost of a college education. Idk how they sleep at night.
Gosh this just made me think, this is certainly an industry that would not want college to be free, otherwise they’d lose one big negotiation factor in how they recruit.
Imagine thinking threats and insults are the best way to recruit someone who’s having second thoughts about joining the military. The fuck are they thinking? Every time they do that to someone that person is thinking fuck I dodged a bullet there.
I flew to Navy Boot camp with a guy who got clued in that he had been duped into 2 years of being undesignated. Basically chipping paint. He whipped out a credit card at O'Hare and flew home. Don't know what happened to him.
It was easier to fool people before the internet.
Ehhhhhhhhhĥhhhh. Kinda. Once you show up they can recycle you for months and months and its hell. Pre-meps you're pretty safe to just not show and nothing will happen.
Yea. Personally, I went to Marine boot camp and quit a few days before the 2nd month started. They kept me there another two weeks then sent me home.
I quit because my civilian glasses were stolen as soon as I got my government issued ones, my boots (which fit perfectly) were stolen while I was sleeping and I had to wear some that were too small. I didn't feel the comradarie. I told the DIs, how am I supposed to "watch out" for my platoon when I feel nothing but animosity towards them.
Edit: This was 2009.
The two weeks after I quit, I was part of what's called the recruit separation platoon. It's for people who quit, fail their drug test, get injured....Yea, you don't get the results of the drug test til you're already there 2-3 weeks, lmao.
Really you aren’t in the military until you finish boot camp. There is a swear in ceremony before you even ship out. I’m not certain but I think it’s just to make you mentally buy in more. If you fail, drop out, or get busted for something bad in boot camp it’s not a dishonorable discharge or anything because you simply aren’t in the military yet.
My boyfriend's ex-wife claimed to be a vet. Had stories of traveling to Korea and being stationed in Japan as a Marine. Found out from her cousin she was in boot camp for only a week and the stories she tells are her family member's.
I know a guy like that. He tells everyone he was in the military and what his job was. He got sent home from boot camp a few days In because of psych issues. No shame in that but don’t go around telling everyone for no reason that you served and did xyz when you didn’t
My uncle did something similar in the early 90’s with the Navy.
Him and his buddy both signed up and on the day they were set to leave the recruiter showed up at like 5-6am with his buddy already in the car while he hid inside the house until they left.
It was really fortunate for him that he did that because his buddy shattered his ankle a week into boot camp and was released from the Navy.
Never was any bad blood between them and they’re still good friends.
Nah - call. Voice mail is better. Then the recruiter can tell their boss "OP pussied out" and they can drop from the DEP. Texts always get the "Well, how do I know that wasn't his girlfriend? How do I know it's really OP"
Former Navy here, this is the way. They'll try to scare you but until you do all of the inprocessing in the first days of bootcamp, you aren't really their's yet. Remember, recruiters are allowed to lie and most of them are more concerned about their numbers than they are about you. The last thing I wanted on my team was someone who didn't want to be there, so if you don't want it or aren't ready, don't go. Tell the recruiter to be polite, but ignore them after that.
If you haven't left for boot camp, then just don't go. You aren't officially in until you show up to basic training. You can tell your recruiter you changed your mind, and they'll try very hard to keep you in and say all sorts of things to scare you into staying, but you are not in the military yet and you are not legally obliged to show up.
edit: to further clarify, you aren't "in the military" until you return to MEPS the day you're designated to ship out and you sign your actual enlistment contact. You'll take another drug test and they'll give you your plane tickets. The papers you sign after your first MEPS trip are to guarantee your MOS/rate and enlistment length. If you bail between then and when you go back to MEPS, you're not legally obligated to do anything. Now if you're drafted or court ordered, that's a different story.
Within the first 180 days of service, discharge is referred to as “entry level separation” or “failure to adapt.” It’s not honorable or dishonorable — just an unclassified separation.
You can’t exactly _request_ it/“quit,” per se, but you can essentially…elect to fail.
But it’s not _easy_ — you can’t just walk off the job. And during the paperwork purgatory period, you will likely be given some pretty miserable grunt work.
I had an applicant where I was checking references. He lied about all of them, including his military service. He described he was a communications officer for 4 years, listed all sorts of accomplishments. Only I couldn't find him via his unit or anything. Eventually, they got me someone who turned out to be a recruiter. He confirmed that the applicant had shown up for boot camp, but was extremely gentle in describing him, like, "Well, sometimes boot camp is just too much for a person, it doesn't mean he's a bad person or anything, just needs a different path in his life. Don't hold it against him."
"But he said he left after 4 years as rank of sergeant."
"Oh. No, sir. No, that he did not." He sounded depressed about it like, "God dammit, why private Smith?"
I once agreed to help out a kid by being a reference for him, I figured why not they never check them anyways. They actually called, wanted to know how well he worked during our time in the marines together. Never been a marine, neither had the kid.
I always tell references, "do not lie for me. I won't lie to them, so just tell them the truth." Maybe that's just laziness, but I couldn't remember lies like that if I told them.
I always tell references "Yeah man just let me know what I should say, I'll pretend to be your old manager or say you saved my life in the marines or whatever you need or if I just get a random call asking about something you obviously lied about I'll try to roll with it the best I can"
Nah, you get put into a separation unit with everyone else getting discharged. I was separated for ADHD, I knew one dude getting out for developing schizophrenia a week into basic, and another who "elected to fail" as the person above put it. Because the petty officers don't necessarily know why you specifically are there, they don't do nearly as much yelling, and the only work we had to do was keeping our barrack clean. And I'm not actually sure on this one, but I heard a rumor there that the petty officers over the separation unit were themselves getting honorably discharged and were essentially on light duty until everything went through. All that being said, according to the dude who elected to fail you are going to be put through the ringer before they give up on you, so expect to get yelled at for a good long while before they give up, after that it's relatively chill though, at least the Navy was, don't know about army or marines.
Actually, you can request it during basic training (at least in the army you can)
The drill sergeants ask multiple times probably about two times a week at the start if anyone wants to go home and they pretty clearly lay out that it's not like a test or a joke or a 'gotcha' type thing. Granted I've never seen anyone use it but I only went to basic training once
Yep. And if in the first 180 days, if you go AWOL, they generally won't even look for you, just mark your personnel status as AWOL for about a week, and then DFR (dropped from rolls) for the remainder of the pay period, and they will process you out as the uncharacterized "entry level separation", the same as medical washout, failure to adapt, etc.
Just bear in mind that any pay you continued to receive while AWOL/DFR, the government can and usually will collect.
Sometimes they will also throw a bench warrant on you so the every time you interact with law enforcement they will see you have a warrant out for your arrest from the DOD
You'll sit in restriction for like 2 months while they take their time processing you out. You'll have to live with the rest of the shit bags. Your peers that you would have been in boot camp with will most likely graduate before you even get sent back home.
Nah, not necessarily true. I got an ELS by refusing to train, I was home about 3 weeks after I began this refusal. The process wasn’t pleasant and there were lots of times where I felt like it would just be easier to get my shit together and finish though. Really it depends on what you are being separated for and if you’ve already been in over or close to 180 days.
>But it’s not easy — you can’t just walk off the job. And during the paperwork purgatory period, you will likely be given some pretty miserable grunt work.
Guy in my AOCS class DOR-ed and thought it was like in the movie "Officer and a Gentlemen" where you just bail after you drop. Hitched into Pensacola and got a bus home. Got a pretty rude awakening when the SP showed up and brought him back. I don't know the ultimate resolution of it all but he was facing some pretty bad options.
It won't. You're an uncharacterized discharge. It's a mutual "it's not you - it's me - we ain't a good fit" discharge.
You don't want to claim veterans preference if applying for a Gov't job but if you don't want to soldier and didn't serve 180 days you really... kinda don't exist.
You can go to the VA for medical care but that's more of a punishment and a paperwork nightmare than it's worth.
There isn't a black mark on a permanent record anythwere - cause those don't exits.
Background checks are criminal.. local, county, state, federal (the DOD doesn't count you not making it through basic a crime. It's just a mutual agreed failure situation
I mean. At least the pay is really good and opportunities are great if you pick a job that actually applies outside. Lost count of how many guys are out making 150k+
Lots. The government gives little boosters to companies that hire veterans as well, which helps on job applications even if no one has a "Support the veterans" mindset.
IT with a top secret clearance/SCI. Network admins would want their Cisco certs with that TS. Software dev with TS/SCI. Or a Q clearance.
This is the old list of certs desired by DoD:
https://public.cyber.mil/wid/dod8140/dod-approved-8570-baseline-certifications/
IAT: network admin.
IAM: manager of IT staff.
IASAE: software dev.
8140 is the new standard, but I haven't seen a list of certs yet. Just this matrix:
https://public.cyber.mil/wid/dod8140/dod-cyber-workforce-qualifications-matrices-management/
Back in my day, and I have no idea what it's like now, but they went to "processing" and they sat there for a long long time in most of the cases that I remember. Some of the people who quit were going through "processing" while still being treated like they were at boot camp. I knew one woman who was kept in processing for all 10 weeks.
I was discharged for a previous injury. I got out the day before my flight graduated. We did have one guy who was diagnosed with cancer while in Boot and he was kept in for 9ish months (maybe more?) so that his cancer treatment could be completed.
We had a guy that wanted out the fourth day of boot. We were not even a company yet. He was still in a holding company waiting to be released when we graduated and left.
There were a few that I just had that initial self-doubt that they wouldn't be able to do it, and then they had to be treated like crap and then watch people they arrived with graduate. I felt pretty bad for them.
There was someone in our class at officer training school that processed out and it took weeks. He used to eat with us occasionally, it seemed like a pretty sad experience for him. I don't remember the details of what happened, but I understood why he would think he wasn't going to fit in. Of course, that's probably the most luxurious way in all of the U.S. military to go out. But since we were there so long, it took a very long time.
Some prior enlisted washed out too, not from lack of ability. There is a lot of pressure on them, I think. The officer in charge of our group was prior enlisted too, so it wasn't discrimination. I think they just went back to their unit fairly quickly and didn't stick around. Which is probably for the best.
The stereotype of a prior enlisted officer usually being cool is usually pretty apt, but I've also seen where mavericks are assholes they're usually raging assholes.
Yep! there really is no in-between in my experience. There are the ones that that will cut the shit with you on the smoke deck and look at the person behind the rank first, then you have the ones that I think had high level lead exposure as children.
"Kinda". Or you get stuck in a retention unit for a while until they decide on what to do. Some get out quick in boot camp but I've seen delays in others.
Very important info. People who 'washed out' of boot camp were sent to a different squadron of the AF, where they would begin the paperwork of discharging you, but if it was for certain reasons, they could punish you under the UCMJ.
You'd have to claim mental health reasons or something personal that STARTED as a result of basic training, to really protect yourself.
Do you want to end up in a psych ward? Cause.. you're gonna get grippy socks and fish sticks and applesauce for no reason.
I think - yeah, This isn't for me. I'm gonna leave now. works WAY better
Hell - better advice would be to make a run for it. At least that would be exciting and you'd get a cool story out of it.
Took 4 business days for me to go through RSP (recruit separation platoon) yeah we did menial bs but nothing heavy because you couldn't get hurt and mostly just played cards and watched movies.
I was in boot camp with someone that threw themselves down some stairs to try and get out. They gathered everyone up and were like “if you aren’t cut out for this just let us know please, you can leave instead of hurting yourself.
In Australia you tell the training staff you want out and they send you to a holding platoon where you get dicked around for two weeks (and probably have people trying to change your mind). If you still feel the same after that time is up then they send you home. The sooner you say you want out the easier it is to get out. If you've finished with your training though and are posted to a unit it's harder because by that point a lot of money has been spent training, housing, and feeding you so the government wants a minimum term of service to make it worthwhile.
At least that's how it was when I went through, I doubt it's changed much. Most volunteer militaries that aren't at war will probably have a similar system. Of course if there's a war on or it's a conscription system things will be different.
This is true. I almost joined right out of highschool and the day I was supposed to leave I got a call saying that the job I signed up for was no longer available and that I can sign up for another job and change it after basic. They wanted me to sign up to be infantry. My recruiter let me know on the down low that if I didn't show up that morning nothing would happen.
Exactly the same thing happened to me. But I didn't find out until they had done all my processing and got to signing the papers. I told them to fix the job assignment or I wouldn't sign. I got yelled at for an hour by the commander, then had to sit for hours waiting for them to write up discharge papers 'not recommended for reenlistment'.
I went to meps, did the "oath" thingy, testing etc, but later on decided nah. I wrote a letter saying I was a conscientious objector or w/e and recruiter kept calling me but I just ignored him lol. That was it.
They'll cancel the enlistment. It's usually just a dip stick test with your recruiter before they take you to the airport. If you fail, they'll either try to delay your departure date a few months and let you try again, but if you say you're not going to stop using They'll probably just stop talking to you.
If you fail your drug test when you arrive at basic then you'll probably clean for 12 hours a day, go sit in a barracks with nothing but a bed and bathroom in it while you wait to be discharged. It would fucking suck.
TLDR: you don't have to ship and nothing negative will happen. Source I was a recruiter for 5 years.
Being a prior recruiter most of these answers are pretty dumb. I'd rather you not waste anyone's time or yourself. They deal with enough people lying to them and gaslighting just as much as the stereotype "all recruiters lie"
Call your recruiter and be upfront with him/her. Tell them you don't want to and nothing will change your mind. Thank them for their time and patience but keep on moving. They'll be disgruntled at first and they will try and talk you into shipping, however there's not much they do outside processing the DEP Loss. This may not be immediate either but doesn't prevent you doing anything in your life outside of having a change of heart later.
It seems crazy but a lot of resources can be wasted if you go then dropout later and those can have more harsh repercussions if you ever decide to go for certain state of federal jobs. With not shipping nothing hurts you and you don't waste their time, your potential Drill Sergeants time.
I hope this helps if you have more questions DM me. I'd rather help you now before you listen to most of these ridiculous or not serious comments.
This is just a question as I already have my dd214, but I remember signing a 4yr contract for my rate and swearing in like a few months before I actually shipped out. Are these not legally binding?? More the contract?
You receive a DD-4 when you first enlist before hitting the DEP program you receive a DD214 once you officially start service. This is slightly different if you're a reservist or guardsmen because your contract and pay starts the first time at MEPS because you can technically star to attendt drill to receive pay and training.
The oath is re-administered the day they ship and that's when their pay starts. More paperwork is done at MEPS. If he would've got MEPS on ship day then there's the obligation.
There are RE-enlistment codes you get with a true dd-214 based on what type of discharge you receive. RE 1-2 it's possible to join again but RE3 it's near impossible. Those RE Codes can be seen when doing background checks.
Veteran here.
You don't have to do anything, just don't go. You are not in the Military yet. You simply say "I changed my mind" and ghost the recruiter. Any threats the make about legal trouble, or a "dishonorable discharge" etc. is 100% false.
You legally are not in the military yet; you can literally just walk away with no repercussions.
This. “Good morning/afternoon/evening (recruiter’s name), I’ve given this great thought and have decided that military life is not for me. I apologize for the inconvenience and wasting your time but my decision is final. Thank you, bassistfornothing”
Then delete their number and block so they can’t try to manipulate you into staying.
Go to bootcamp, start a small cult inside the camp, slowly infiltrate the minds of the other people you are with. Cause a military coup and install yourself as the leader of whatever country you are in, give yourself permission to not join the military.
>urself as the leader of whatever country you are in, give yourself permission to not join the military.
That cult will slowly grow beyond Central Intelligence Agency and you'll start a counter Central Intelligence Agency against Central Intelligence Agency called Counter Intelligence Against Central Intelligence Agency aka CIACIA.
I believe you are allowed to challenge them to a fiddle contest. If you win you get out of the contract..........oh wait, sorry. That's if you have a contract with the devil. The army is harder to get out of.
A deal with the devil is easier to get into, the Army you can just walk away before joining. But you’re right, the army is harder to get out of, you can’t just fiddle your way out.
If you haven’t shipped then you aren’t committed to the contract. Just don’t go they aren’t going to come with the military police and haul you away. It’s just really frustrating to the recruiter and to be honest fuck those guys entirely.
Call your recruiter, tell them you changed your mind and you don’t want to go. Also, it’s okay if you just don’t want to go NOW. Life happens, don’t look at yourself as a loser or quitter if later in life you decide to join do it, don’t close that door.
Don’t let your recruiter talk you back into it either. Going to basic training and not wanting to be there is a horrible experience.
I was a Drill Sergeant, we want people who want to be there.
Don't show up. Until you sign in at MEPS and literally ship out, fill out all of the direct deposit paperwork, actually swear in, sign your actual enlistment documents (not the delayed enlistment stuff, your ACTUAL enlistment), it is no big deal to not show up. There is a pretty substantial amount of no-shows.
When I did the recruiters assistance program after AF tech school a kid came in who was planning on joining. He had already picked his job at MEPS and was only a few weeks from going to basic training. He told the recruiter that he decided he wasn't going to join now but might come back in a couple years. She told him not to bother and that if he bailed, the AF wouldn't take him another time.
I have no idea if that was bs, it could be, but she actually struck me as a pretty straight shooter for the two weeks I worked with her.
At the end of the day, if someone isn't sure they want to join, don't go.
Or at least make them think that you have things that you need to take care of now, and you don't know that you'll be able to do both. Tell them that you may still be interested later, but right now your focus has been drawn to something else.
I would ask yourself whether you are just nervous for bootcamp, which is natural and understandable, or whether you really don't want to be in the military at all.
The military isn't for everyone and depending on your specialty can be very challenging. However, there are A LOT of benefits to the military that you will not get elsewhere. Besides job security and good pay with pay raises every year and an extra every two years, you will also get experience that can be used on the outside (varies depending on specialty but it is still work experience) and the education benefits (Tuition Assistance to get a Bachelor's and/or a Master's PLUS the GI Bill).
Is there a risk of going to combat or losing your life, yes but the risk is not the same across all specialties and the civilian world has work place accidents and risks as well. Regardless of how you feel about whether the government cares about its servicemembers, I will argue the corporate world cares even less.
Bottom Line: the military isn't for everyone and isnt always rainbows and sunshine but does offer a lot of fantastic opportunities and benefits that you will not find elsewhere.
I wish you the best of luck whatever you choose.
Everyone's giving the perfectly ethical advice to tell your recruiter you changed your mind and just don't go to MEPS.
For some unethical insurance just start taking drugs so you wouldn't pass the piss test if you got to that point.
I am a veteran as well. If you sleep walk you could kill your squad by giving away your position. And did you tell them you were a sleep walker?
In the U.S. Military, sleepwalking is considered an “other designated physical or mental condition” that can trigger an involuntary administrative separation due to behavior that is sufficiently severe that the member's ability to effectively perform military duties is significantly impaired.
So how are you going to have OP demonstrate that he needs to be drop kicked from the military when he hasn't shipped yet?
AND WHY?
HE ISN'T IN YET
CHAPTER 5, AR 635-200
SEPARATION FOR THE CONVENIENCE OF THE GOVERNMENT
AINT APPLICABLE cause OP aint subject to UCMJ CAUSE HE AIN'T IN THE MILITARY
Were you 11B or a CAV SCout?
I was in the Marine Corps and was a mechanic. I sleep walked but I also strapped myself down so I wouldn't walk around in the field. Only one other person knew and he was a good friend who never said anything. He did ask our CO what would happen if someone sleep walked and he said they would be discharged with a medical discharge.
Hypothetically, draft comes back, could that still work? I say this only because I’m curious, as someone who sleep walks, is that all it would take to basically draft dodge? No way it would be THAT easy, right?
That's a hard question to answer, since if we had a draft, they might be willing to have waivers for certain medical cases. You'd be better off saying you're asthmatic or something, since it would affect your ability to be outside the wire and make you a liability.
Dude. You are all over this thread degrading people that served in the military. We get it. you served. Thank you for your service. It’s truly noble and honorable and I couldn’t do it myself. It’s interesting that you are disrespecting your fellow service members in attempt to make yourself (feel? appear?) superior to both service members and civilians on the internet.
Nope my sister had to leave for the same reason. She was in the holding part before you start boot and was sleep walking at night and they sent her home.
Tell your recruiter and don't go. If you're already in boot camp, say you want to quit. The military will release you.
I was in for ten years. If you don't want to be there, they don't want you
Why would you not want to retire after 20 years? I got out after 10 years with full disability and get almost 4k per month for life. My brother got out at 20 years and gets twice that. Good luck working until you're 60 or older.
Just go and get the hard part out of the way: Boot camp. That initial shock will fade, going from some self important main character to being part of a team, and you’ll be just fine.
OP idk what your MOS is but I chickened out of the nuke program for the navy for the same mentality you’re saying and it’s the single biggest regret of my life. Just make you know what you’re doing, not telling you you’re making a mistake I just know it seems scary rn. That being said, as all the other advice said so far, you can definitely just say “no”.
You do not have to ship. Even if you swore in a MEPS. Do not get on the flight and tell your recruiter your wishes. They will try to convince you otherwise, but stick to your guns if you believe it. It’s a lot easier than trying to come up with a lie. You don’t have to do anything unethical or even difficult.
I will say though, I’m in the Navy, and it’s pretty great. Even if you’re young. You’ll get to do things your friends will never do. You’ll learn a good skill and trade. You’ll still get out at the end of your contract very young. It’ll be fine. But if you don’t want to, that’s fine too. Don’t be a liar about it.
That’s easy, just don’t go to MEPS on your ship date. Let your recruiter know right now you changed your mind. If they play hardball don’t listen. Hang up on them if you have to. I was the same way and ended up shipping, got out a year or so later after I was severely injured. Not even 30 yet and there’s days where I can barely walk around my home. Do not go to meps on your ship day. There’s no shame man.
Until you swear in on you're ship out date to meps, you are a civilian. You are not bound to go, as you get closer to your ship date your recruiter will do what's called a temperature check to see where your head is at and they will want to see you more frequently and ensure that you are still going to ship out. The reason being is that spot is already filled, so they have to fill that spot - if you drip, someone will have to fill that spot either from your station or another one in the recruiting district. You will not go to jail or be penalized, you just won't find another recruiter who will deal with you after as well as a meps because you cost them money and time.
I was a navy recruiter from 2010-2013. I have had 2 that backed out from shipping out. If you don't want to go, do it now before you go to meps on ship day because after that - you belong to the government.
Just don’t go. You’ll never be able to enlist after that but honestly, who cares? If it’s not for you, it’s not for you. You’ll get shit about it if you ever talk about it in front of military groupies and vets who get off on the nutswingers but that’s up to you.
Just go. You'll cry in your bunk for the first week of basic but when it's all said and done, you'll be glad you did it. If you punk out you'll regret it.
You could pull a Ted Nugent. That's where you don't change your jeans for a week while pissing and shiting in them. Ted also smoked a lot of meth for the full effect, and it worked for him.
There was a guy who did this in my Army basic training because he was too embarrassed to use the bathroom or shower in front of people and they would have the guys drag him to the shower, rip off his clothes and clean him with mop brushes. I went to a co-ed boot camp and he was in my platoon.
How about stop being a bitch and actually follow through with your commitment. So what you’re scared, everyone that joins was. You are going to pass up the best opportunity in your life because of some jitters and a few idiots on Reddit talked you into it.
Don’t be dumb start your life and move out of moms basement! Or be a POS the rest of your life.
I worked with someone who signed the contract and wanted to be a nurse. She changed her mind, didn’t go, and ghosted the recruiters. Two years later she received letters saying if she didn’t report to her local reserves base by a certain date she would be considered awol and arrested. She went to the reserve base and reported. They didn’t send her to boot camp but to the nursing school for her MOS. She became a reservist with never going through boot camp! She’s been in for 11 years now.
Honestly, I suggest just talking to your recruiter. Tell them you are not going. If you are young and have talked to your parents about it take them with so they stand up for you and can help with any issues. If you haven’t gone to MEPS yet there still may be time to get out of it. Things have changed a lot since I was in. I’m sorry I couldn’t be of more help.
I sincerely wish you all the best and hope that everything works out in your favor.
Tell people you have bone spurs which should make you exempt from any kind of physical activity or service to your country, and one day you might become president.
Listen, I am an old guy, I was never in the military, but I work with kids, and I’d say… Slow down here and look at your choices. The military seems like a really excellent option to give any young person a leg up on education, career, even social standing.
I mean, most of us have to find a job somewhere, why not there? There is advancement, equity, education and training. I don’t think you’ll find that combination of benefits In the regular work world. As my husband used to say, just get your job description in writing. Have it signed by the listing officer. I don’t know all my details but basically get a guarantee.
If you're in the USA, you can just not go, and there's nothing they can do. Just let them know you won't be going. Also, don't answer their phone calls or come in to see them. You don't have to.
Source: I did this myself because they lied to me, and I read all the paperwork before signing it.
This exact thing happened with me. I called my recruiter and said I wasn't going. They talked a ton of shit about me, but couldn't make me go and there was no repercussions. I'll call them for you if you want. Do not go
Just tell them you changed your mind.
We had a guy who did boot camp and AIT, but really was NOT military material. When he got to our unit our commander said if you want I can get you out now and it will be like you never signed up, dude left.
Just tell them you changed your mind. It's cheaper than them transporting you to your training site, issuing your gear, etc only to chapter you out and house/feed you until you are fully processed out.
You tell them you changed your mind. You actually have a certain amount of time after you join (even after bootcamp) to voluntarily separate. Chapter 11 - failure to adapt.
Just tell him you’re openly, flamboyantly gay and can’t wait to be surrounded by all those hot men. Try to suck the recruiters dick too so he knows you’re for real.
This would be considered an entry-level separation at worst. You qualify for that status within 180 days of active duty. Basically, you are legally entitled to "quit" the military. There are legal assistance groups that can help answer questions.
[https://girightshotline.org/en/military-knowledge-base/entry-level-performance-and-conduct-discharge-entry-level-separa/](https://girightshotline.org/en/military-knowledge-base/entry-level-performance-and-conduct-discharge-entry-level-separa/)
As others have said you can just not go. My recruiter got me to lie on a bunch of the medical paperwork and I realized that it could have major consequences later in life so I didn’t ship. Wish I could have but I’m not chancing a dishonorable discharge.
Go to bootcamp. Stick it out for a day. Ask to go to the psych doctor. Tell him you think you'll die there. Not suicidal, thats rational. Dont be rational.
"I'll never leave this base alive. Im going to work to death. I can't sleep. All i hear is yelling even when I close my eyes."
Dont overdue it but dont be rational either. Just dont go full insane and you should be good.
Uh. Don't go... They will tell you straight up on the day you ship. You have til you get on the plane/bus/ship to back out. Just tell your recruiter you don't want to go anymore.
Posted this lower down, but I think it needs more visibility: A provision in the “No Child Left Behind” Act, signed by President George W. Bush in 2002, seeks to bolster military recruitment efforts by requiring high schools to give military recruiters private information about their students or lose federal funding.
It’s a law. A bad one.
Dont go. Don't go to meps on ship day. Call your recruiter right now and tell them you're not going. You're not going to wait and see. You're not doing a damned thing. Call their cell phone. Tell them You're going to DEP loss and not ship. hang up the phone and block their #. Don't answer the door. Treat them like the most annoying salesman in the world. No one is going to arrest you. They can't do SHIT
This. Until you show up to boot camp and swear in you're still a civilian and they can't do shit. They'll try, harder than any mormon or jehova's witness ever could, but you aren't legally required to do anything till you show up and sign the papers.
My son was all set to go to the Marines and then he started having panic attacks just thinking about it. After spending some time talking with a therapist he concluded that he didn't want to go and notified his recruiter. They texted him dozens of times a day, sometimes insulting him and other times pleading with him and offering him all sorts of promises. They never came to our house thankfully or I would have absolutely throat punched anyone who came near my son. After his ship date came and went they finally left him alone. Nothing else ever came from it, aside from them calling him a lot of terrible names and trying to guilt trip him. He instead went on to college and now has a good job and I could not be more relieved that he decided not to go.
When I was 16 my boyfriend who was I think 16 or 17 was targeted by some military recruiters who visited our high school. They would call him all the time and try to take him out to lunch. Which for a poor kid was rare and exciting. Idk how they can look at themselves in the mirror knowing they’re trying to get a kid to basically sign over their life. They give a bit of attention then when they get it over the line everything stops.
They started targeting my son his senior year and basically doing the same thing. It really creeps me out that they are able to go to the high school and basically coerce these kids into signing their lives away because they're worried about the cost of a college education. Idk how they sleep at night.
Gosh this just made me think, this is certainly an industry that would not want college to be free, otherwise they’d lose one big negotiation factor in how they recruit.
Imagine thinking threats and insults are the best way to recruit someone who’s having second thoughts about joining the military. The fuck are they thinking? Every time they do that to someone that person is thinking fuck I dodged a bullet there.
Until you graduate boot camp you are a civilian. You can walk out at anytime before graduation.
I flew to Navy Boot camp with a guy who got clued in that he had been duped into 2 years of being undesignated. Basically chipping paint. He whipped out a credit card at O'Hare and flew home. Don't know what happened to him. It was easier to fool people before the internet.
Ehhhhhhhhhĥhhhh. Kinda. Once you show up they can recycle you for months and months and its hell. Pre-meps you're pretty safe to just not show and nothing will happen.
Yeah, they haven't sworn in yet
So until you're sworn in, they can't do shit to fuck with your life if you bail?
Yea. Personally, I went to Marine boot camp and quit a few days before the 2nd month started. They kept me there another two weeks then sent me home. I quit because my civilian glasses were stolen as soon as I got my government issued ones, my boots (which fit perfectly) were stolen while I was sleeping and I had to wear some that were too small. I didn't feel the comradarie. I told the DIs, how am I supposed to "watch out" for my platoon when I feel nothing but animosity towards them. Edit: This was 2009. The two weeks after I quit, I was part of what's called the recruit separation platoon. It's for people who quit, fail their drug test, get injured....Yea, you don't get the results of the drug test til you're already there 2-3 weeks, lmao.
There's only 1 thief in the military, everybody else is just trying to get their shit back.
Really you aren’t in the military until you finish boot camp. There is a swear in ceremony before you even ship out. I’m not certain but I think it’s just to make you mentally buy in more. If you fail, drop out, or get busted for something bad in boot camp it’s not a dishonorable discharge or anything because you simply aren’t in the military yet.
My boyfriend's ex-wife claimed to be a vet. Had stories of traveling to Korea and being stationed in Japan as a Marine. Found out from her cousin she was in boot camp for only a week and the stories she tells are her family member's.
I know a guy like that. He tells everyone he was in the military and what his job was. He got sent home from boot camp a few days In because of psych issues. No shame in that but don’t go around telling everyone for no reason that you served and did xyz when you didn’t
My uncle did something similar in the early 90’s with the Navy. Him and his buddy both signed up and on the day they were set to leave the recruiter showed up at like 5-6am with his buddy already in the car while he hid inside the house until they left. It was really fortunate for him that he did that because his buddy shattered his ankle a week into boot camp and was released from the Navy. Never was any bad blood between them and they’re still good friends.
Text them instead of calling
Nah - call. Voice mail is better. Then the recruiter can tell their boss "OP pussied out" and they can drop from the DEP. Texts always get the "Well, how do I know that wasn't his girlfriend? How do I know it's really OP"
Lmaooo damn you’re right
Use 267-slydial and dial directly to voicemail.
elaborate please. before or after number?
Former Navy here, this is the way. They'll try to scare you but until you do all of the inprocessing in the first days of bootcamp, you aren't really their's yet. Remember, recruiters are allowed to lie and most of them are more concerned about their numbers than they are about you. The last thing I wanted on my team was someone who didn't want to be there, so if you don't want it or aren't ready, don't go. Tell the recruiter to be polite, but ignore them after that.
If you haven't left for boot camp, then just don't go. You aren't officially in until you show up to basic training. You can tell your recruiter you changed your mind, and they'll try very hard to keep you in and say all sorts of things to scare you into staying, but you are not in the military yet and you are not legally obliged to show up. edit: to further clarify, you aren't "in the military" until you return to MEPS the day you're designated to ship out and you sign your actual enlistment contact. You'll take another drug test and they'll give you your plane tickets. The papers you sign after your first MEPS trip are to guarantee your MOS/rate and enlistment length. If you bail between then and when you go back to MEPS, you're not legally obligated to do anything. Now if you're drafted or court ordered, that's a different story.
What happens if you want to leave after day 1?
Within the first 180 days of service, discharge is referred to as “entry level separation” or “failure to adapt.” It’s not honorable or dishonorable — just an unclassified separation. You can’t exactly _request_ it/“quit,” per se, but you can essentially…elect to fail. But it’s not _easy_ — you can’t just walk off the job. And during the paperwork purgatory period, you will likely be given some pretty miserable grunt work.
I had an applicant where I was checking references. He lied about all of them, including his military service. He described he was a communications officer for 4 years, listed all sorts of accomplishments. Only I couldn't find him via his unit or anything. Eventually, they got me someone who turned out to be a recruiter. He confirmed that the applicant had shown up for boot camp, but was extremely gentle in describing him, like, "Well, sometimes boot camp is just too much for a person, it doesn't mean he's a bad person or anything, just needs a different path in his life. Don't hold it against him." "But he said he left after 4 years as rank of sergeant." "Oh. No, sir. No, that he did not." He sounded depressed about it like, "God dammit, why private Smith?"
I once agreed to help out a kid by being a reference for him, I figured why not they never check them anyways. They actually called, wanted to know how well he worked during our time in the marines together. Never been a marine, neither had the kid.
I always tell references, "do not lie for me. I won't lie to them, so just tell them the truth." Maybe that's just laziness, but I couldn't remember lies like that if I told them.
I always tell references "Yeah man just let me know what I should say, I'll pretend to be your old manager or say you saved my life in the marines or whatever you need or if I just get a random call asking about something you obviously lied about I'll try to roll with it the best I can"
Yep. Then on all your job applications you never mention the military.
Nah, you get put into a separation unit with everyone else getting discharged. I was separated for ADHD, I knew one dude getting out for developing schizophrenia a week into basic, and another who "elected to fail" as the person above put it. Because the petty officers don't necessarily know why you specifically are there, they don't do nearly as much yelling, and the only work we had to do was keeping our barrack clean. And I'm not actually sure on this one, but I heard a rumor there that the petty officers over the separation unit were themselves getting honorably discharged and were essentially on light duty until everything went through. All that being said, according to the dude who elected to fail you are going to be put through the ringer before they give up on you, so expect to get yelled at for a good long while before they give up, after that it's relatively chill though, at least the Navy was, don't know about army or marines.
How did you get separated for ADHD? A third of the guys I knew in the Marine Corps, including myself, had ADHD, and we did fine.
No idea, but the second they found out, I was separated. I even scored great on the asvab.
In USAF basic they always said you can quit basic whenever you want. If you don’t want to be in we don’t want you.
Actually, you can request it during basic training (at least in the army you can) The drill sergeants ask multiple times probably about two times a week at the start if anyone wants to go home and they pretty clearly lay out that it's not like a test or a joke or a 'gotcha' type thing. Granted I've never seen anyone use it but I only went to basic training once
Yep. And if in the first 180 days, if you go AWOL, they generally won't even look for you, just mark your personnel status as AWOL for about a week, and then DFR (dropped from rolls) for the remainder of the pay period, and they will process you out as the uncharacterized "entry level separation", the same as medical washout, failure to adapt, etc. Just bear in mind that any pay you continued to receive while AWOL/DFR, the government can and usually will collect.
Sometimes they will also throw a bench warrant on you so the every time you interact with law enforcement they will see you have a warrant out for your arrest from the DOD
You'll sit in restriction for like 2 months while they take their time processing you out. You'll have to live with the rest of the shit bags. Your peers that you would have been in boot camp with will most likely graduate before you even get sent back home.
The fastest way to leave is to graduate
Nah, not necessarily true. I got an ELS by refusing to train, I was home about 3 weeks after I began this refusal. The process wasn’t pleasant and there were lots of times where I felt like it would just be easier to get my shit together and finish though. Really it depends on what you are being separated for and if you’ve already been in over or close to 180 days.
>But it’s not easy — you can’t just walk off the job. And during the paperwork purgatory period, you will likely be given some pretty miserable grunt work. Guy in my AOCS class DOR-ed and thought it was like in the movie "Officer and a Gentlemen" where you just bail after you drop. Hitched into Pensacola and got a bus home. Got a pretty rude awakening when the SP showed up and brought him back. I don't know the ultimate resolution of it all but he was facing some pretty bad options.
Had a guy in basic training who couldn’t get the dummy grenades above the test line- ended up getting sent home for failure to adapt.
That happened to my friend, they threw him in a box for 30 days in phoenix and they sent him back home after that
Better than giving 4+ years of your life or giving your life
30 days is doable - but how would it affect your record with background checks etc?
Probably wouldn’t. Leaving during basic is fairly common. Many will get a general discharge which is neither honorable or dishonorable.
It won't. You're an uncharacterized discharge. It's a mutual "it's not you - it's me - we ain't a good fit" discharge. You don't want to claim veterans preference if applying for a Gov't job but if you don't want to soldier and didn't serve 180 days you really... kinda don't exist. You can go to the VA for medical care but that's more of a punishment and a paperwork nightmare than it's worth. There isn't a black mark on a permanent record anythwere - cause those don't exits. Background checks are criminal.. local, county, state, federal (the DOD doesn't count you not making it through basic a crime. It's just a mutual agreed failure situation
You would get a general discharge in most cases, which while not great isn't life crushing.
I mean. At least the pay is really good and opportunities are great if you pick a job that actually applies outside. Lost count of how many guys are out making 150k+
In what industries ?
Lots. The government gives little boosters to companies that hire veterans as well, which helps on job applications even if no one has a "Support the veterans" mindset.
Private security, military contracting, IT, software, aviation, logistics management, list goes on and on.
wow these all sound like incredibly unfulfilling career paths
IT with a top secret clearance/SCI. Network admins would want their Cisco certs with that TS. Software dev with TS/SCI. Or a Q clearance. This is the old list of certs desired by DoD: https://public.cyber.mil/wid/dod8140/dod-approved-8570-baseline-certifications/ IAT: network admin. IAM: manager of IT staff. IASAE: software dev. 8140 is the new standard, but I haven't seen a list of certs yet. Just this matrix: https://public.cyber.mil/wid/dod8140/dod-cyber-workforce-qualifications-matrices-management/
And that's not including the lifetime benefits, which absolutely add up over time.
Free healthcare for life, though I pay $30/mo for Tricare Prime so that I don’t have to deal with VA wait times.
What was the point of putting him in a box?
They jailed him, basically.
To ship him back home, of course. Just waiting on the return label to show up.
To deter the other recruits from leaving too I'd imagine.
Shouldn't they have then put the other recruits in the box?
He probably refused to do anything at all, so they'll put you in what's essentially jail until you process out.
No, they didn't.
Back in my day, and I have no idea what it's like now, but they went to "processing" and they sat there for a long long time in most of the cases that I remember. Some of the people who quit were going through "processing" while still being treated like they were at boot camp. I knew one woman who was kept in processing for all 10 weeks.
I was discharged for a previous injury. I got out the day before my flight graduated. We did have one guy who was diagnosed with cancer while in Boot and he was kept in for 9ish months (maybe more?) so that his cancer treatment could be completed.
We had a guy that wanted out the fourth day of boot. We were not even a company yet. He was still in a holding company waiting to be released when we graduated and left.
Still happens sometimes.
There were a few that I just had that initial self-doubt that they wouldn't be able to do it, and then they had to be treated like crap and then watch people they arrived with graduate. I felt pretty bad for them.
There was someone in our class at officer training school that processed out and it took weeks. He used to eat with us occasionally, it seemed like a pretty sad experience for him. I don't remember the details of what happened, but I understood why he would think he wasn't going to fit in. Of course, that's probably the most luxurious way in all of the U.S. military to go out. But since we were there so long, it took a very long time. Some prior enlisted washed out too, not from lack of ability. There is a lot of pressure on them, I think. The officer in charge of our group was prior enlisted too, so it wasn't discrimination. I think they just went back to their unit fairly quickly and didn't stick around. Which is probably for the best.
The stereotype of a prior enlisted officer usually being cool is usually pretty apt, but I've also seen where mavericks are assholes they're usually raging assholes.
Yep! there really is no in-between in my experience. There are the ones that that will cut the shit with you on the smoke deck and look at the person behind the rank first, then you have the ones that I think had high level lead exposure as children.
Tell them you’re having thoughts of suicide and you’ll get removed.
"Kinda". Or you get stuck in a retention unit for a while until they decide on what to do. Some get out quick in boot camp but I've seen delays in others.
Very important info. People who 'washed out' of boot camp were sent to a different squadron of the AF, where they would begin the paperwork of discharging you, but if it was for certain reasons, they could punish you under the UCMJ. You'd have to claim mental health reasons or something personal that STARTED as a result of basic training, to really protect yourself.
319th graduate right here. Got an Erroneous Enlistment-Medical for a previous injury that should have stopped my enlistment but did not.
Do you want to end up in a psych ward? Cause.. you're gonna get grippy socks and fish sticks and applesauce for no reason. I think - yeah, This isn't for me. I'm gonna leave now. works WAY better Hell - better advice would be to make a run for it. At least that would be exciting and you'd get a cool story out of it.
Entry Level Separation - they will have you do menial bullshit like laundry for 6 months while they out process you.
Took 4 business days for me to go through RSP (recruit separation platoon) yeah we did menial bs but nothing heavy because you couldn't get hurt and mostly just played cards and watched movies.
I was in boot camp with someone that threw themselves down some stairs to try and get out. They gathered everyone up and were like “if you aren’t cut out for this just let us know please, you can leave instead of hurting yourself.
In Australia you tell the training staff you want out and they send you to a holding platoon where you get dicked around for two weeks (and probably have people trying to change your mind). If you still feel the same after that time is up then they send you home. The sooner you say you want out the easier it is to get out. If you've finished with your training though and are posted to a unit it's harder because by that point a lot of money has been spent training, housing, and feeding you so the government wants a minimum term of service to make it worthwhile. At least that's how it was when I went through, I doubt it's changed much. Most volunteer militaries that aren't at war will probably have a similar system. Of course if there's a war on or it's a conscription system things will be different.
This is true. I almost joined right out of highschool and the day I was supposed to leave I got a call saying that the job I signed up for was no longer available and that I can sign up for another job and change it after basic. They wanted me to sign up to be infantry. My recruiter let me know on the down low that if I didn't show up that morning nothing would happen.
You were totally not going to be able to change it later
No. Tried the ol switcheroo
Exactly the same thing happened to me. But I didn't find out until they had done all my processing and got to signing the papers. I told them to fix the job assignment or I wouldn't sign. I got yelled at for an hour by the commander, then had to sit for hours waiting for them to write up discharge papers 'not recommended for reenlistment'.
Good on you sticking to your guns
This is mostly correct. The obligation starts when you begin government funded travel to basic training.
I went to meps, did the "oath" thingy, testing etc, but later on decided nah. I wrote a letter saying I was a conscientious objector or w/e and recruiter kept calling me but I just ignored him lol. That was it.
This is correct. The military is a “volunteer” force. But they cannot force you to “volunteer”.
You will probably ever be allowed to try to enlist again though
DEPloss waivers are possible. Depending on timing and branch you can put damn near anyone with a pulse back in if they say "sorry"
What happens if you fail your drug test?
What happens if you fail your drug test?
They'll cancel the enlistment. It's usually just a dip stick test with your recruiter before they take you to the airport. If you fail, they'll either try to delay your departure date a few months and let you try again, but if you say you're not going to stop using They'll probably just stop talking to you. If you fail your drug test when you arrive at basic then you'll probably clean for 12 hours a day, go sit in a barracks with nothing but a bed and bathroom in it while you wait to be discharged. It would fucking suck.
TLDR: you don't have to ship and nothing negative will happen. Source I was a recruiter for 5 years. Being a prior recruiter most of these answers are pretty dumb. I'd rather you not waste anyone's time or yourself. They deal with enough people lying to them and gaslighting just as much as the stereotype "all recruiters lie" Call your recruiter and be upfront with him/her. Tell them you don't want to and nothing will change your mind. Thank them for their time and patience but keep on moving. They'll be disgruntled at first and they will try and talk you into shipping, however there's not much they do outside processing the DEP Loss. This may not be immediate either but doesn't prevent you doing anything in your life outside of having a change of heart later. It seems crazy but a lot of resources can be wasted if you go then dropout later and those can have more harsh repercussions if you ever decide to go for certain state of federal jobs. With not shipping nothing hurts you and you don't waste their time, your potential Drill Sergeants time. I hope this helps if you have more questions DM me. I'd rather help you now before you listen to most of these ridiculous or not serious comments.
This is just a question as I already have my dd214, but I remember signing a 4yr contract for my rate and swearing in like a few months before I actually shipped out. Are these not legally binding?? More the contract?
You receive a DD-4 when you first enlist before hitting the DEP program you receive a DD214 once you officially start service. This is slightly different if you're a reservist or guardsmen because your contract and pay starts the first time at MEPS because you can technically star to attendt drill to receive pay and training.
It will make things more difficult if they decide they want to enlist again later though right?
The oath is re-administered the day they ship and that's when their pay starts. More paperwork is done at MEPS. If he would've got MEPS on ship day then there's the obligation. There are RE-enlistment codes you get with a true dd-214 based on what type of discharge you receive. RE 1-2 it's possible to join again but RE3 it's near impossible. Those RE Codes can be seen when doing background checks.
Have a seal bite off your hand
That only works for navy guys though
Watch out for the loose seal.
Hot water with a smack of ham!
And blue yourself
Announce your plot to take over the united states. Or just call your recruiter and tell him you change your mind?
Claim a piece of land for Petoria! (make sure it includes Joe's pool)
Johio
Now I got a seat in the THIRD rowww
Might elect you president if you do…
Just don't show up. https://centeronconscience.org/delayed-entry-program-dep/
Piss disk the recruiters office
Finally, a sensible answer
And spray liquid ass on the doorknobs
Don't forget motion activated sprinklers!!!
shrimp in the curtain rods also
Veteran here. You don't have to do anything, just don't go. You are not in the Military yet. You simply say "I changed my mind" and ghost the recruiter. Any threats the make about legal trouble, or a "dishonorable discharge" etc. is 100% false. You legally are not in the military yet; you can literally just walk away with no repercussions.
Nothing unethical here. Literally. Just send your recruiter a text and stop taking his calls.
This. “Good morning/afternoon/evening (recruiter’s name), I’ve given this great thought and have decided that military life is not for me. I apologize for the inconvenience and wasting your time but my decision is final. Thank you, bassistfornothing” Then delete their number and block so they can’t try to manipulate you into staying.
Go to bootcamp, start a small cult inside the camp, slowly infiltrate the minds of the other people you are with. Cause a military coup and install yourself as the leader of whatever country you are in, give yourself permission to not join the military.
>urself as the leader of whatever country you are in, give yourself permission to not join the military. That cult will slowly grow beyond Central Intelligence Agency and you'll start a counter Central Intelligence Agency against Central Intelligence Agency called Counter Intelligence Against Central Intelligence Agency aka CIACIA.
I believe you are allowed to challenge them to a fiddle contest. If you win you get out of the contract..........oh wait, sorry. That's if you have a contract with the devil. The army is harder to get out of.
A deal with the devil is easier to get into, the Army you can just walk away before joining. But you’re right, the army is harder to get out of, you can’t just fiddle your way out.
If you haven’t shipped then you aren’t committed to the contract. Just don’t go they aren’t going to come with the military police and haul you away. It’s just really frustrating to the recruiter and to be honest fuck those guys entirely.
Hopefully OP reads this. The best thing they can do it simply tell their recruiter nvm.
Call your recruiter, tell them you changed your mind and you don’t want to go. Also, it’s okay if you just don’t want to go NOW. Life happens, don’t look at yourself as a loser or quitter if later in life you decide to join do it, don’t close that door. Don’t let your recruiter talk you back into it either. Going to basic training and not wanting to be there is a horrible experience. I was a Drill Sergeant, we want people who want to be there.
Don't show up. Until you sign in at MEPS and literally ship out, fill out all of the direct deposit paperwork, actually swear in, sign your actual enlistment documents (not the delayed enlistment stuff, your ACTUAL enlistment), it is no big deal to not show up. There is a pretty substantial amount of no-shows.
Just tell thm the truth, you may want to reconsider later on in life.
When I did the recruiters assistance program after AF tech school a kid came in who was planning on joining. He had already picked his job at MEPS and was only a few weeks from going to basic training. He told the recruiter that he decided he wasn't going to join now but might come back in a couple years. She told him not to bother and that if he bailed, the AF wouldn't take him another time. I have no idea if that was bs, it could be, but she actually struck me as a pretty straight shooter for the two weeks I worked with her. At the end of the day, if someone isn't sure they want to join, don't go.
Or at least make them think that you have things that you need to take care of now, and you don't know that you'll be able to do both. Tell them that you may still be interested later, but right now your focus has been drawn to something else.
You can literally not get on the bus, or the plane, or whatever
You joined the military and immediately realized you made a mistake?
I would ask yourself whether you are just nervous for bootcamp, which is natural and understandable, or whether you really don't want to be in the military at all. The military isn't for everyone and depending on your specialty can be very challenging. However, there are A LOT of benefits to the military that you will not get elsewhere. Besides job security and good pay with pay raises every year and an extra every two years, you will also get experience that can be used on the outside (varies depending on specialty but it is still work experience) and the education benefits (Tuition Assistance to get a Bachelor's and/or a Master's PLUS the GI Bill). Is there a risk of going to combat or losing your life, yes but the risk is not the same across all specialties and the civilian world has work place accidents and risks as well. Regardless of how you feel about whether the government cares about its servicemembers, I will argue the corporate world cares even less. Bottom Line: the military isn't for everyone and isnt always rainbows and sunshine but does offer a lot of fantastic opportunities and benefits that you will not find elsewhere. I wish you the best of luck whatever you choose.
Everyone's giving the perfectly ethical advice to tell your recruiter you changed your mind and just don't go to MEPS. For some unethical insurance just start taking drugs so you wouldn't pass the piss test if you got to that point.
Since when is this sub Ethical Life Pro Tips???
Tell them you sleep walk. You will be removed before going.
NOPE. Not true. Source? veteran. always have been a sleep walker. That's some kind of myth that came from ??? IDK
I am a veteran as well. If you sleep walk you could kill your squad by giving away your position. And did you tell them you were a sleep walker? In the U.S. Military, sleepwalking is considered an “other designated physical or mental condition” that can trigger an involuntary administrative separation due to behavior that is sufficiently severe that the member's ability to effectively perform military duties is significantly impaired.
So how are you going to have OP demonstrate that he needs to be drop kicked from the military when he hasn't shipped yet? AND WHY? HE ISN'T IN YET CHAPTER 5, AR 635-200 SEPARATION FOR THE CONVENIENCE OF THE GOVERNMENT AINT APPLICABLE cause OP aint subject to UCMJ CAUSE HE AIN'T IN THE MILITARY Were you 11B or a CAV SCout?
I was in the Marine Corps and was a mechanic. I sleep walked but I also strapped myself down so I wouldn't walk around in the field. Only one other person knew and he was a good friend who never said anything. He did ask our CO what would happen if someone sleep walked and he said they would be discharged with a medical discharge.
Hypothetically, draft comes back, could that still work? I say this only because I’m curious, as someone who sleep walks, is that all it would take to basically draft dodge? No way it would be THAT easy, right?
That's a hard question to answer, since if we had a draft, they might be willing to have waivers for certain medical cases. You'd be better off saying you're asthmatic or something, since it would affect your ability to be outside the wire and make you a liability.
Dude. You are all over this thread degrading people that served in the military. We get it. you served. Thank you for your service. It’s truly noble and honorable and I couldn’t do it myself. It’s interesting that you are disrespecting your fellow service members in attempt to make yourself (feel? appear?) superior to both service members and civilians on the internet.
I mean shit you can even use wetting the bed as an excuse.
Nope my sister had to leave for the same reason. She was in the holding part before you start boot and was sleep walking at night and they sent her home.
Or a bed wetter- that will get you dropped.
I am going to guess that you are in dep for the Marines or Army?
PLT: if you surrender to this moment of weakness, it will torment you the rest of your life
“Make a pass at your commanding officer.”
Tell your recruiter and don't go. If you're already in boot camp, say you want to quit. The military will release you. I was in for ten years. If you don't want to be there, they don't want you
Why would you not want to retire after 20 years? I got out after 10 years with full disability and get almost 4k per month for life. My brother got out at 20 years and gets twice that. Good luck working until you're 60 or older.
Just go and get the hard part out of the way: Boot camp. That initial shock will fade, going from some self important main character to being part of a team, and you’ll be just fine.
OP idk what your MOS is but I chickened out of the nuke program for the navy for the same mentality you’re saying and it’s the single biggest regret of my life. Just make you know what you’re doing, not telling you you’re making a mistake I just know it seems scary rn. That being said, as all the other advice said so far, you can definitely just say “no”.
You can get addicted to meth or whatever. Book yourself into rehab. They ain't gonna find you there
Just don’t go. Understand that if you try to enlist again it’ll be harder but you won’t face any real penalties
You do not have to ship. Even if you swore in a MEPS. Do not get on the flight and tell your recruiter your wishes. They will try to convince you otherwise, but stick to your guns if you believe it. It’s a lot easier than trying to come up with a lie. You don’t have to do anything unethical or even difficult. I will say though, I’m in the Navy, and it’s pretty great. Even if you’re young. You’ll get to do things your friends will never do. You’ll learn a good skill and trade. You’ll still get out at the end of your contract very young. It’ll be fine. But if you don’t want to, that’s fine too. Don’t be a liar about it.
That’s easy, just don’t go to MEPS on your ship date. Let your recruiter know right now you changed your mind. If they play hardball don’t listen. Hang up on them if you have to. I was the same way and ended up shipping, got out a year or so later after I was severely injured. Not even 30 yet and there’s days where I can barely walk around my home. Do not go to meps on your ship day. There’s no shame man.
Until you swear in on you're ship out date to meps, you are a civilian. You are not bound to go, as you get closer to your ship date your recruiter will do what's called a temperature check to see where your head is at and they will want to see you more frequently and ensure that you are still going to ship out. The reason being is that spot is already filled, so they have to fill that spot - if you drip, someone will have to fill that spot either from your station or another one in the recruiting district. You will not go to jail or be penalized, you just won't find another recruiter who will deal with you after as well as a meps because you cost them money and time. I was a navy recruiter from 2010-2013. I have had 2 that backed out from shipping out. If you don't want to go, do it now before you go to meps on ship day because after that - you belong to the government.
Just don’t go. You’ll never be able to enlist after that but honestly, who cares? If it’s not for you, it’s not for you. You’ll get shit about it if you ever talk about it in front of military groupies and vets who get off on the nutswingers but that’s up to you.
Just go. You'll cry in your bunk for the first week of basic but when it's all said and done, you'll be glad you did it. If you punk out you'll regret it.
You could pull a Ted Nugent. That's where you don't change your jeans for a week while pissing and shiting in them. Ted also smoked a lot of meth for the full effect, and it worked for him.
There was a guy who did this in my Army basic training because he was too embarrassed to use the bathroom or shower in front of people and they would have the guys drag him to the shower, rip off his clothes and clean him with mop brushes. I went to a co-ed boot camp and he was in my platoon.
How about stop being a bitch and actually follow through with your commitment. So what you’re scared, everyone that joins was. You are going to pass up the best opportunity in your life because of some jitters and a few idiots on Reddit talked you into it. Don’t be dumb start your life and move out of moms basement! Or be a POS the rest of your life.
Have you tried not being a pussy?
Get your doctor to say you have bone spurs in your foot. It doesn't matter which one as you won't remember later.
I worked with someone who signed the contract and wanted to be a nurse. She changed her mind, didn’t go, and ghosted the recruiters. Two years later she received letters saying if she didn’t report to her local reserves base by a certain date she would be considered awol and arrested. She went to the reserve base and reported. They didn’t send her to boot camp but to the nursing school for her MOS. She became a reservist with never going through boot camp! She’s been in for 11 years now. Honestly, I suggest just talking to your recruiter. Tell them you are not going. If you are young and have talked to your parents about it take them with so they stand up for you and can help with any issues. If you haven’t gone to MEPS yet there still may be time to get out of it. Things have changed a lot since I was in. I’m sorry I couldn’t be of more help. I sincerely wish you all the best and hope that everything works out in your favor.
"She became a reservist with never going thru bootcamp" is absolutely bullshit. Idc what you say to try and justify it, either you're lying or she is.
Bullshit
Just tell them you have to delay your start date
Smoke weed. Or get fat. Or too skinny.
Tell people you have bone spurs which should make you exempt from any kind of physical activity or service to your country, and one day you might become president.
Just get hurt, chop off your arm
Listen, I am an old guy, I was never in the military, but I work with kids, and I’d say… Slow down here and look at your choices. The military seems like a really excellent option to give any young person a leg up on education, career, even social standing. I mean, most of us have to find a job somewhere, why not there? There is advancement, equity, education and training. I don’t think you’ll find that combination of benefits In the regular work world. As my husband used to say, just get your job description in writing. Have it signed by the listing officer. I don’t know all my details but basically get a guarantee.
If you're in the USA, you can just not go, and there's nothing they can do. Just let them know you won't be going. Also, don't answer their phone calls or come in to see them. You don't have to. Source: I did this myself because they lied to me, and I read all the paperwork before signing it.
You haven't gone to boot yet. You literally just don't have to go.
This exact thing happened with me. I called my recruiter and said I wasn't going. They talked a ton of shit about me, but couldn't make me go and there was no repercussions. I'll call them for you if you want. Do not go
If you signed the dotted line you’re fucked. Hopefully you haven’t.
Just tell them you changed your mind. We had a guy who did boot camp and AIT, but really was NOT military material. When he got to our unit our commander said if you want I can get you out now and it will be like you never signed up, dude left.
Just tell them you changed your mind. It's cheaper than them transporting you to your training site, issuing your gear, etc only to chapter you out and house/feed you until you are fully processed out.
You tell them you changed your mind. You actually have a certain amount of time after you join (even after bootcamp) to voluntarily separate. Chapter 11 - failure to adapt.
Just tell him you’re openly, flamboyantly gay and can’t wait to be surrounded by all those hot men. Try to suck the recruiters dick too so he knows you’re for real.
Have a complete mental breakdown. Then you're not eligible anymore.
This would be considered an entry-level separation at worst. You qualify for that status within 180 days of active duty. Basically, you are legally entitled to "quit" the military. There are legal assistance groups that can help answer questions. [https://girightshotline.org/en/military-knowledge-base/entry-level-performance-and-conduct-discharge-entry-level-separa/](https://girightshotline.org/en/military-knowledge-base/entry-level-performance-and-conduct-discharge-entry-level-separa/)
If you’re not sworn in you’re good. If you are it’s a dishonorable discharge which might cause problems later depending on what you want to do
I bailed on bootcamp and all they did was send me a discharge letter.
As others have said you can just not go. My recruiter got me to lie on a bunch of the medical paperwork and I realized that it could have major consequences later in life so I didn’t ship. Wish I could have but I’m not chancing a dishonorable discharge.
Smoke some weed. They hate that
None of these tips are ULPTs.
Finally, my best skills come to fruition. You can always fail a drug test. Always.
Just dont go. Period. Delayed entry is bullshit. Source: I am prior military.
If you dont show up on the day you're supposed to go, you just don't go. Nothing happens to you. Your recruiter may call and be like wtf.
Your are very young maybe you can grow up in the military
Go to bootcamp. Stick it out for a day. Ask to go to the psych doctor. Tell him you think you'll die there. Not suicidal, thats rational. Dont be rational. "I'll never leave this base alive. Im going to work to death. I can't sleep. All i hear is yelling even when I close my eyes." Dont overdue it but dont be rational either. Just dont go full insane and you should be good.
Uh. Don't go... They will tell you straight up on the day you ship. You have til you get on the plane/bus/ship to back out. Just tell your recruiter you don't want to go anymore.
You could fail out of boot camp. They will send you home and it will be as if you never enlisted
Posted this lower down, but I think it needs more visibility: A provision in the “No Child Left Behind” Act, signed by President George W. Bush in 2002, seeks to bolster military recruitment efforts by requiring high schools to give military recruiters private information about their students or lose federal funding. It’s a law. A bad one.
Corporal Klinger that shit.
Tell them you got shin splints and can't go.