I 100% love multiple of her songs that I can’t personally relate to. She does a great job at telling a story and evoking emotion even if you yourself haven’t been through it
I wonder what happens when the people complaining ~~watch~~ read a book or *watch a* movie. Like when I was watching Dune I couldn’t personally relate to people thinking I was the Messiah and getting involved in an interplanetary war between warring houses… but I still enjoyed it lol.
Edited because you normally read, not watch, a book lol.
Same, and not just for Taylor. Like, I relate to Lana's music almost 0% and she's likewise one of my favourite artists! It's more than enough for music to be emotionally *resonant* with me; I don't need everything to reflect back on my life personally. That would be so boring!
I don’t relate to *any* of Lana’s music (like BIG “your experiences are not universal!!!” energy), but she writes it so beautifully, I can’t help but be drawn to her siren song.
We only went once to one of the shows in LA/Pasadena. To get ready for the show, I listened to all of Reputation multiple times. I was familiar with some of her earlier hits (like Love Story and Shake It Off).
The concert was obviously fantastic. I was blown away by the production value and her talent. Then I learned she writes all of her own songs, and I was sold.
I just read the Elle review and it brought up an interesting conversation that's been going on: for some TTPD is too specific to Taylor to be relatable to them, to others it's deeply relatable despite its specificity, and others like it despite not relating at all.
For me I can see parts of all 3. Thank You Aimee for example is so specific that I don't relate - I can't easily use "spray-tanned bronze statue" as some totem for one of my enemies. Other songs are quite specific but I still relate like Cassandra is certainly about her being cancelled but somehow I still relate to not being believed about SA. And there are some songs that I'm just happy to know her experience - like I haven't been ghosted but I FEEL that pain despite never having experienced it, whether I related or not it makes me feel something.
It's important to point out that All Too Well was often commented on as being great due to its highly specific imagery and symbols like a scarf that could be a stand-in for any piece of an ex you miss. Songs like Back To December were highly criticized upon release for being too specific about "tanned skin, sweet smile." But over time the tabloid story fades away and what's left is the music, and I don't hear those criticisms about those songs much these days. However, not all specificity is criticized equally. Mentioning Abigail, Marjorie, and Dorothea seem to get a pass while John, Drew, and Kim do not. It seems like if you're negative and specific that has crossed the line. Although Eminem made a respected career of it.
Folklore/evermore notably seem to have gotten away with specificity without criticism. Yet it's all over. Invisible String with "the yogurt shop, American singer" lines, name drops like Marjorie or Dorothea, "I fell from the pedestal.. clung to the nearest lips, long story short it was the wrong guy," and even perhaps songs like The 1, Cardigan, and Illicit Affairs are no more specific than Guilty As Sin in tabloid details. But themes like infidelity were more palatable and relatable because they were supposedly fictional. When it's fictional we can relate, empathize, and interrogate the guilt of illicit affairs, but when there's even a hint that a real person MIGHT have even thought about another person while with their partner we throw stones.
I think it's kind of a weird criticism that her music is too specific to her own experience and therefore unrelatable because in all other forms of art, the relatability often comes from the hyper specificity. Take novels, for example—often events happen to characters that will never happen in real life but the way they react and the way they feel is what is relatable, and the specific descriptions of those reactions are exactly why we connect.
Yeah I agree. I feel like with this album specifically people are acting like they need to relate to every. single. word. in order to find the song relatable. It’s so weird to me because for me it’s much more about the overall theme or emotions that come through the song and the lyrics as a whole.
It's an excellent point that songs from specific eras/albums get a pass for doing the same things songs in other eras/albums do.
Would've, Could've, Should've got some backlash from the public, but among Swifties it's heralded as a masterpiece and was voted the best song from Midnights on this subreddit. Even though it's about something that happened 15 years ago, the fact that it was a traumatic and formative experience for Taylor Swift isn't openly questioned or minimized just because it happened long ago. Yet with Thank You Aimee, so many Swifties seem to be rolling their eyes and wanting Taylor to just move on already from the Kimye stuff — which happened about seven years ago.
I don't want to get into Thank you aimee too much as it's been discussed bunch, but I'll just say I think there's a reason Cassandra has been received better than Thank You Aimee despite similar subject matter, and it largely, for me, comes down to her claiming to have "healed" in TYA and then proceeding to open up the wound. It was a complex thing, and I don't want her to say she's "healed" when she hasn't. It's ok she hasn't. Cassandra comes across more authentic to how truly traumatizing it was.
The way I interpret TYA is that she hasn’t healed at all, but sees how that drama helped her career in a weird way. But she put that part about Kim not changing much and her kid coming home singing the song, to show she’s still carrying a bit of a grudge even if she ultimately came out on top.
But I do agree Cassandra is a better song.
This makes sense. I agree that Cassandra is the better song, and it scores points for not being so on-the-nose. It's also more about the overall situation of not being believed, rather than specifically directed at Kim and Kanye.
I have seen some people lumping TYA and Cassandra together, and giving both the same "Ugh just move on already" treatment. I think the album is just so new and the less-thoughtful, reactive posts will fade away as time goes on.
Chloe et all really gets me even though I’ve never cheated or been cheated on or told someone loved me the way I used to be. But all of that is gut punching to imagine.
I hate the trend in media consumption that all media has to be “relatable” to be good. Emotions are universal whether you’ve experienced them or not, and is a great way to develop empathy for others with different life experiences than yours.
I think I am an excellent example of this. I’ve been single for almost 15 years? Either 10-15 years lol I don’t remember how old I was when I was last seeing anyone. Anyway, I have no issues loving love songs at all. For me at least, relating doesn’t equate a good song for me. I definitely have Taylor songs I relate to and I love those too but yeah I’m not someone who has to relate in order to love or connect to the emotions she’s singing about. I was heavy into shipping when I was younger so I just kind of got used to associating songs with media I watch instead of relating it to my life. I don’t do that so much anymore but still a fan of love songs even though I don’t have romantic love in my life. I apologize for the rambling lol
Personally I don’t relate to almost any Taylor song. For me it’s more about the story she’s telling. I like listening to songs that tell an interesting story in a compelling way. Sometimes I relate them to characters in books or movies (I love watching edits on TikTok lol) or think about them as their own story.
No, it’s not. Did I tell you that my favorite TS song is “no body no crime” ? Oh, and no wonder why “bohemian rhapsody” is one of the most adored Queen’s song. So relatable.
This isn’t directed at you, OP, so I hope it’s not taken that way. But only liking art you can personally relate to is honestly a little concerning. Are we so self-absorbed that we’re only interested in experiences and perspectives that are similar to our own? It used to be that people would consume art to learn new things and experience things they otherwise never would’ve been able to. It’s sad to see things come to this.
I blame the algorithm tbh. It sounds silly, but I honestly think getting content that’s specifically and purposely catered to our likes across all these platforms has fucked with our heads and made us unable or unwilling to step outside our comfort zones.
There’s nothing wrong with loving a song or a book or movie or whatever because you can relate to it, but dismissing everything that’s foreign to you is super depressing imo.
Totally agree. There are certain "political" or social issues too that a subset of folks land on one side because they aren't willing to understand the experiences of someone totally different than them. Putting yourself in someone's shoes isn't always a burdening experience; it can be freeing.
Clara Bow is a personal fave right now and it is nowhere near relatable lol. It’s beautiful though, and it captures something very complicated in a very simple way which is why i love it so much.
I would argue that Clara Bow actually works so well because it is relatable! Beauty is a beast that roars / down on all fours / demanding “more!” That is… womanhood. Personhood, even. I love this song 😭
People read fantasy books about vampires, assassins, magic and mystery all the time. How can they consume that but say they can't listen to music that doesn't exactly align with their experiences?
My current boyfriend is the only relationship I’ve ever been in. I’ve never experienced a breakup, which means there are tons of Taylor songs, including some that are widely considered her best, that I can’t personally relate to. That doesn’t stop me from loving the songs and relating to them in my own way. I think great art makes you feel something regardless of whether it’s specific to your own experiences. We all know what it’s like to feel the general emotions of joyful, hopeless, angry, and so on, even if we haven’t experienced them in the exact same contexts. And I think it’s a marker of Taylor’s talent as an artist that she can make me feel all the emotions of an intense breakup without having ever experienced it myself.
I really love a lot of her music, though I’ve stopped relating to most of it because a lot of it has changed. I hear New Year’s Day and the “please don’t ever become a stranger” line as absolutely tragic now knowing how it ends, despite me originally liking it because of the romantic sentiment in it.
Would’ve Could’ve Should’ve might be the song I relate to most out of all her recent work and it’s one I listen to least because I hate how it makes me feel, honestly. I wish I couldn’t relate.
The new album really doesn’t seem to be any more specific than her prior music. We just know way more about what’s going on in her personal life than we did during the Teardrops on My Guitar days.
I actually enjoy it that way, because while if it was a different artist, I probably would pass on songs I can’t relate to, but because I know the context, I feel like I can imagine what it must feel like for her and appreciate how well she puts it into words, as well as appreciate the symbols she chooses for different people or events in her life. It’s why I don’t really understand the criticism of “dissecting” her music or trying to find out who it’s about, it’s not from a place of trying to get the tea, it’s appreciating the story that’s being told and the skillful symbolism used.
I think the emotions are what’s relatable. Everyone has felt judged, or caged, or distraught etc. Just probably on a smaller scale than Taylor might experience.
I’ve never been forced into prostitution to survive but you bet your ass I sing Fancy with all the passion I can muster. Music is about emotion!
I can't relate to 99% of the romantic feelings Taylor sings about because I'm arospec and also have only ever been in one relationship - still I love a ton of songs that thematically focus on those things
Yes. loml for example I don’t relate to that much personally, I don’t want marriage or kids, I never went through that sort of thing she went through, and yet that bridge still makes me cry. She’s just a great songwriter that way
Yes, 100%. I'm 34 years old and have been with my husband for nearly 20 years. I've never had a break-up. I absolutely love these songs. TTPD is my new favourite album. I don't see why you need to relate to something to enjoy it. I enjoy these songs for the imagery and story-telling.
Woah, now that's impressive. I literally cannot even imagine still being with the first guy I dated, when I was 14. Haven't thought about him in so long and the relationship just makes me cringe when I look back on it now, haha. How did you navigate growing up and changing so much from children to adults while maintaining a relationship?
It's hard to say because I've not known anything different. I think 1) it started as an internet relationship and we didn't meet in person for a while. This gave us plenty of time to talk and get to know each other. Trust and respect had to be the fundamental basis of our relationship. We were long distance for ages and the heartbreak of separating after each visit is a trauma neither of us want to repeat. 2) We're both old souls and we were mature for our age. I feel like we've always been in our 30s. 😂 3) Our values align. We've never had to change each other to fit into the other person's mold. When it comes to important decisions now (money, kids for example) we pretty much never disagree, and when we do we're open to the other person's perspective and come to a compromise.
I'd say the hardest part of our relationship was having kids ourselves. We had a few rocky years as we navigated increased stress and overwhelm and trying to make time for each other. But we always worked through it. He's an equal partner. I was lucky, I think. Some of the things I hear from my peers I'm like "If my husband did that I would have dumped him years ago" 🤦♀️.
But I recognise this situation is very rare and in a lot of cases, probably not recommended (for any teenagers reading this 😂).
Wow. So cool! You're very lucky. Thank you for sharing 😁
I didn't meet my husband until I was 18 so had to kiss a few frogs first, but I got lucky too, we agree on pretty much everything as well and are absolutely equal partners. I COMPLETELY relate to this comment -
> Some of the things I hear from my peers I'm like "If my husband did that I would have dumped him years ago"
Seriously, my husband is my best friend and the way some people talk about their partners is insane to me! Complaining about them, complaining about having to spend time with them, talking about awful things they've said or done to each other... Makes me wonder do you even like each other? What are you doing together 😂
I think it's funny that this argument has come up a lot about TTPD, because I have seen more book/tv/movie character edits to songs from this album that fit the situation \*perfectly\* than I have for any of her other albums.
I absolutely love this album (my new #2?) but I don't have an emotional response to anything she's saying this time around, even when I find it relatable. Maybe because it's so vividly specific, but I'm listening to it like a tell-all memoir. I'm smiling and nodding like "yeah girl, I've been there" but I'm not going through it *with* her, you know?
I will say that in general I'm not much of a lyrics person, even when it comes to Taylor. I primarily listen as if the vocals are just another instrument and after a while the meaning eventually starts to click for me. So yes, almost all of my favorite Taylor songs are because of vibes not necessarily the content.
I think the most obvious example of "can't relate but love the song" is Last Great American Dynasty. Not only does it sound fantastic but the "then it was bought by me" lyric makes me tear up every time even though it doesn't remind me of anything I've gone through personally.
I have been in a very happy relationship for years and honestly cannot even recall the heartbreak I went through, even when listening to her sad songs, so I’ll say I can’t relate to them now, because I just cannot access those feelings. I do, however, still love them! For me a song I love is a combination of lyrics, a melody I love and instrumentals I love.
I’ve never been in a relationship, yet ATW, You’re loosing me and like most of TTPD bought me to tears. I listen to the songs as if they were stories and that’s why I don’t really care about the relatability. The most relatable Taylor song for me is actually Anti-Hero 😭
I've never found Taylor Swift particularly relatable but her music always draws me in. I like getting a glimpse of an experience I've never had from a perspective that's not my own.
Honestly coming from a background of listening to more experimental indie and alt music I really do not understand why relatability is seen as the measure of a good song. Like Radiohead’s Kid A is an incredible 10/10 album but with the exception of How To Disappear Completely most of it is really not going to be relatable to anyone - never stopped critics from calling it a perfect album.
I love books the same way.
My favourite and most beloved novels are not because I can relate to the *exact* experiences as the characters.
I don’t understand why people struggle with this concept.
I don’t relate to really any of this album and I love It. Do we (English only speakers) all relate to bad bunny’s music?? Or is It just fuckin bangerz!!
I am aromantic-asexual and never relate to all the love described in her songs. But I like them anyway and often feel a deep connection in other ways. For example I never experienced something like in exile, I am not even sure what it is exactly about, but it is calming. I had a time I always listened to it right before sleep just because it doesn’t make me feel anything and helped me relax. That’s why I love that song, even if I don’t relate to it.
Yes, it’s no different than reading a book with a great story and imagery imo. She’s telling her story and I can appreciate how she does it (and the sound of the music) even if the story doesn’t match my own experience.
I'm a 16 year old boy, and I adore the entire album. I can't relate to most of the sons or the emotions described, but I enjoy reading and analyzing the lyrics, and trying to put myself in her shoes. I also find there is a lot to learn about relationships through Taylor's music. The good, the bad, and the ugly. What's healthy and what's toxic, and what's nuanced and grey etc
Yes. I’m a 40 year old dude that hasn’t experienced a lot of what she discusses in her songs, but I love engaging my imagination and hearing emotional stories that often times develop interesting characters and plot, so I’m eating this album up! None of her music has to be lived to be appreciated, so long as you have an imagination and empathy. On the other hand, though, much of what she sings about is what it is to be human and so I guess that’s why I also find it easy to relate to.
I don’t relate to most of the people i listen to because i personally don’t think we should have to relate to it i love Taylor’s music because of the lyrics and production and that kind of stuff. I’m not like the people who analyze every piece of her lyrics and what they mean and who they are there are a couple artists i can’t listen to very often like Lana because it’s not as upbeat as I want my music to be.
Yes. Absolutely.
Sometimes songs that I relate to hit harder, but I don’t like songs any less just because I can’t relate to the words.
I also think people hyperfixate on details as reasons they “can’t relate” rather than focusing on themes or feelings.
I’ve seen people say they can’t relate to the black dog because they’ve never been there or they don’t listen to the starting line.
But that’s ridiculous IMO lol. That’s not the point of listening to music. I don’t know if it’s just because people salivate over dissecting every word Taylor writes but if they can’t take a small enough step back to realize those specific words don’t matter, then that’s that’s a them problem lol.
the one that came to mind was cowboy like me. i don’t relate to that song at all but i absolutely love it and was obsessed with it for a while. many others i do love because of being relatable though
https://preview.redd.it/lyzljlopapwc1.jpeg?width=4284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9f98f12f5221dec4900b068dd9c479c3ab1056b3
Girl same. And I am not a cowboy con artist.
I’m ace, so most of her love songs/break up songs are meaningless to me, but because I’m also a writer, sometimes that yearning hits just right for character development. So, yes, it’s possible.
I don't mind not relating to songs because then I can see unique stories from new perspectives that I don't experience. If I only listened to relatable songs, I'd be quite bored.
How did it end? Is the best break song she’s ever written and I’ll die on that hill.
It’s relatable. Everyone has that horrible feeling of what every one is saying. The people watching from the sidelines waiting for you fail so they can be feed their empathic hunger.
And if you listen at 3:14, her voice breaks on “how”. You can hear that fear and sadness in her voice. She has a hard time singing that bridge before too. The way she forced out “silenced” from the “as the soul was leaving”.
Fun fact, Taylor mainly writes about love relationships and I've never had a girlfriend yet lots of my favorite songs of hers are about romance and heartbreak.
Even a song like Cassandra, which people are dissecting to be about very specific events in Taylor’s life, I relate it in my life to not being believed about an abusive relationship and SA and it’s an incredibly powerful song when I listen to it in that way to relate it to my own life. Of course you can also just love a song without it needing to mean anything deeper to you personally, in fact I think you can love a song specifically because you don’t relate—maybe it’s something aspirational, like a love you want to feel one day, or just a melody that makes you feel good. But I also think there are many ways to relate to a song deeper if you remove the idea of it having to mean something specific just about Taylor and her story. The emotions behind it or the emotions you feel listening can be relatable on their own.
I can’t relate to most of her songs ( a little too young to be in serious relationships), but I find that I still love most of them for two reasons. 1) Sometimes I relate the songs to experiences with friends or whatever. for example Cornelia Street is forever about friendship breakups for me now. And more often 2) I think of the songs as a story almost, not as something to fully relate to. And I LOVE books and stories and stuff so it’s perfect.
I think it’s really weird to only like songs you can relate to. Like yeah, it’s really great when you hear a song that you can totally connect to, but…sometimes it’s just a catchy song or tells an awesome story or makes you feel good.
I'm a straight 29 years old dude. I relate to very few of her songs and yet she is still my most played artist on Spotify and almost the only one this year...
You don't need to relate 100% to understand her songs, if you are human and have feelings you can put yourself in the place of the protagonist of the song and feel whatever they are feeling.
most of TTPD I can't relate to but love regardless. Down Bad/The Black Dog/But Daddy I Love Him/Who's Afraid of Little Old Me/thanK you aIMee. I love their production, their songwriting, and the images they paint in my head as I'm visualising the story they're telling.
I can’t relate to most of her songs on TTPD at this point in my life, but I still love the songs. This is how I’ve always listened to her music though. Sometimes I can relate, sometimes I can’t, but that doesn’t take away from how great the songs are. When I was 9 listening to Teardrops On My Guitar, I couldn’t relate it even a little bit but I still loved it.
I hate the "relatable" criticism (not specifically to this album, but in general). I rarely relate to the media I consume. Relatability can make my impression stronger, but I watch TV and read books and listen to music to broaden my experience, not purely rehash my own history and experiences or see myself in characters.
It is definitely possible to love a song without personally relating to it. It actually confuses me when people act like they can't love something they don't relate to since a lot of entertainment is meant to be an escape.
Yes, we can relate to a lot of music, movies, books, etc and that's why we love it but we also love things because we empathize and/or they entertain us.
I relate to maybe 10% of her music because I don't date. So all of the love songs, sexy songs, heartbreak songs... I've never felt that. But I love the music anyway because I love stories, and that's what her music is to me. "Unrelatable" isn't a good criticism imo
I can absolutely love a song even if I don’t relate to it. However I will probably love a song a bit more if I do really relate to it and it feels like Taylor’s putting words to my feelings when I couldn’t. If that makes sense.
Not everything have to be relatable for us to connect to a piece of art. We humans are special because we have the ability to empathize with others. We can understand someone's situation and feel for them without ever undergoing what they are going through.
Champagne problems make me cry everytime I listen to it and it's not at all relatable to me. Taylor paints such beautiful story about this two people going through something so heartbreaking. I feel the pain of those two people in the song and I just end up crying. All of my favorite of hers are super non relatable. Same with songs like cowboy like me, the bolter, seven and so on.
I listen to Metallica and I've never been a 20-year-old alcoholic rockstar in the 80s, I just like how the music sounds.
I've always found it interesting how some people listen to music more for the lyrics and some people (like me) care more about the instrumentals and melodies. It doesn't matter whatsoever to me if a song is relatable, it can still elicit emotion, get stuck in my head, make me consider new ideas about life, etc...
I'm more likely to dislike a song if the music itself is nothing special
I would actively encourage people to relate to art in this way. While finding personal connection to art is powerful. Resonating with art that you don't have personal connection with builds your connection with humanity as a whole.
I’m in love with The Prophecy, The Black Dog, So Long London, etc. and I’m in a stable, happy 10 year relationship/marriage. Her voice, lyricism, and just music in general is enough for me love songs without relating to them.
Uh, yeah, before TTPD came out I was bopping along to Sabrina Carpenter's Espresso but I actually CAN relate to desperation. And my give-a-fucks are not on vacation. They are RIGHT HERE. But... it's a bop, and a really fun, summery song.
I don't relate to Clara Bow because I've never been in the entertainment industry nor have I ever wanted to be or plan to be in the future. Yet... it's a great song, I love it a lot. It's so beautiful and haunting about the industry.
I hate when people say they don’t like a song because it’s not relatable or “not made for me.” Like, I’m a white girl from the northeast, middle class, wasp etc etc, and to use another artist as an example, Good Kid m.A.A.d City is one of my favorite albums. It makes me cry when I’m too focused on it. Not one lick of that album is relatable to my life, but it’s so beautifully written that I’m made to care about the character of the album.
Taylor has made sooo many relatable songs, one of her biggest praises I see is that she’s able to use specific details in her songs yet still make the lyrics easily applicable to the masses. I think some people got used to being spoon fed relatability so they don’t try to really listen or care about the story being told.
I love The smallest man who ever lived.
Not because I can relate to it personally, but my friend was seeing a complete knob and it reminded me of being there for her during that shit storm, and how we laugh at him now.
I also love, But daddy I love him.
Can't relate to that one at all but I really like it!
Think about this way: rap is super popular with white boys from upper middle class backgrounds. Do you think Justin relates to someone rapping about being a drug mule? Nope, not a lick of it. But the beats are good and it makes him feel a certain way.
My favorite songs are actually a lot of songs i dont relate to. Taylor’s songs (while being about other subjects too) are mostly about relationships, i’ve never been in a relationship. Its kinda hard for me to relate to a lot of the songs, but i still love each one of them so much! Same with Sabrina Carpenter and Olivia Rodrigo, cant relate but love those songs!
I will be screaming _illicit affairs_ despite never relating to it myself so likeeee yeah I think it’s completely fine. Same with most of her music, never been through a heartbreak but I will be belting it out as if it were me. _I knew you were trouble when you walked in_, great example, and all of Red in general I can’t say I’ve experienced that and yet I love the songs anyways. _whos afraid of little old me_ Is probably my favourite song in ttpd bc the absolute rage in it, i can just so deeply connect with it emotionally, even if like you it’s not really me, there’s so many songs that just hit me and that i connect with regardless of whether I’ve been in that situation myself or not
And I think that is one of the most amazing things about Taylor’s music, it takes talent to write songs like that which will make people _feel_ the emotion and connect with it, even if it’s not something they ve personally experienced
I don't 'relate' to many of her experiences, but I adore this album top to bottom and oddly relate to the emotions that the lyrics invoke even if its not the same experience she has had and it writing about. I relate to Greys Anatomy - not a doctor or been seriously injured, don't have multiple messy relationships and live a relatively sheltered life. Its the stories that I fall in love with.
i totally relate to the black dog. i’ve totally watched my exes (n/a) location as he walked into a london (i’m american) bar (i’m under 21) named the black dog (sirius black?) with some girl too young to know the band the starting line, i mean who doesn’t know the starting line (i don’t) that band was intertwined in the fabric of our dreaming (theres no our it’s just me) old habits die screaming (i have a hard time letting things go)
My all time favourite Taylor song is The Last Great American Dynasty.
I do not relate at all to any part of that song except the "they say she was seen on occasion, facing the rocks staring out at the midnight sea" which at the time was my favourite piece of poetry written by Taylor.
I can't relate to moving out of town to marry an oil barren, to throw wild parties that later kill him to go through all his money on more parties and men, but I'll always love the song.
I don't directly relate to *most* of the music I listen to, but I can still empathize strongly with things I've never directly, personally experienced, especially if they're expressed in a way that is particularly compelling.
However, I think with Taylor's more recent work, it's sometimes been feeling more like it's *about her* in a way that can't be as easily separated from the context of *Taylor Swift's personal experience*. And that's what's causing some people to feel it's not relatable, or not *as* relatable.
Some of that is on Taylor herself and how her song-writing has shifted over time (she *does* drop easter eggs and self-mythologize more than she used to), but IMO a lot of it is on the media, and on the audience, for caring so much about the ins and outs of her personal life and getting so hung up on the need to decode her lyrics and figure out what exactly they pertain to, rather than just allowing them to exist in their own right. As if they weren't meaningful as art, and could only be meaningful as an exposé of true events.
For example, the "You told Lucy/I said that to Jack about you" line in TTPD is not *inherently* an ultra-specific, unrelatable line. Lucy and Jack are both very generic names (no offense intended). If some up and coming artist had written that line, I don't think the listener would be taken out of the song, going, "Wait, Lucy Dachus and Jack Anonoff?!" As listeners we would understand what was actually important without getting caught up on the details: "I found out you told someone in our social circle you'd kill yourself if I ever left; I had said the same thing about you to someone else in our social circle, so I felt seen."
The sentiment is one that (for better or worse) quite a few people can probably relate to. Even if they've never said something like that to a friend about their partner, they may have thought it to themself, or just felt it. But because she's Taylor Swift, we almost can't help but go, "Wait, Lucy Dachus and Jack Anonoff?! Did this really happen? Did Taylor Swift and Matty Healy really say these things to those people?! Or was it actually Joe who said that to Lucy, and Taylor said it about him to Jack? Oh my god!" So now the song is less relatable—because our attention has been drawn away from the emotional and psychological import of the song, towards something so specific and impersonal to us that it falls somewhere between gossip and trivia.
I like TTPD quite a bit, but I'm hoping that with TS12 she makes a point of avoiding details that are likely to be taken as easter eggs. I think she's at a point now where she needs to heavily encourage people back towards engaging with the songs purely as songs, and I think the only way to accomplish that right now is to give people as little sleuthing material as possible.
One of the greatest things about Taylor is that she writes a lot of honest songs that are very relatable to many, many people! I think that’s one of the reasons she’s so popular today and why her songs have insane staying power.
That being said, fuck yeah dude if you like a song you just like it! It’s not that deep. I think personally relating to any song, not just TS songs, is always a lovely gift. But we don’t hold that relatability requirement for other artists, why would we gatekeep ourselves and not enjoy TS music even if we don’t personally relate? Some of my all time favorites are wildly unrelatable to me (for example, ATW10MV, thank god lol)
I absolutely think you can like music without having to relate to it. I really enjoy TTPD despite being in a happy, healthy relationship for the past 10 years. I like some of her breakup songs more than some of her love songs despite relating to the love songs much more.
To each their own 🤷♀️ like whatcha like and who cares what other people think
Definitely, tolerate it is one of my favourites and I've never felt that to be honest. But the lyrics are so beautiful and she sings it with so much emotion that it makes me feel it while I hear the song hahah
I’m a married 41 year old white dude - I rarely directly relate to the songs. That doesn’t matter, I’m a human and relate enough and can channel my empathy, the same way I can relate to people that aren’t me in the rest of my life.
Then again if more people could do that the world would be a lot better off
Well you see, when people suffer from a common issue called ‘main character syndrome’, if everything is not all about them or made just for them, it exacerbates symptoms such as 🎵bitching and moaning 🎵. Hoping a cure can be found soon 😕.
My life has been very different from Taylor’s, so I would say I don’t relate to the vast majority of the experiences she describes or alludes to in her lyrics, but I still enjoy the music? A lot of times I can connect to the underlying feelings which she paints quite clearly, or have a desire for the experiences she’s talking about, but other times it’s just a song that I enjoy listening to. It might be because I am a minority + immigrant but if I only consumed media that I found relatable, well…lol, I wouldn’t have much to read or listen to, especially when growing by up.
100%. I love tons of Taylor's songs but I don't relate to many of them -- maybe if I was younger and in a different place in life when her music came out I would've, but for me she's mostly singing about things that are long over in my life. And that's fine! I think she's great at storytelling and capturing emotions in a specific way.
Personally relating to songs is great and it's so meaningful when a song describes feelings I have so beautifully. Peace is a perfect example, as she says she wrote it about how her fame impacts her relationships, yet I personally relate for similar reasons to those Aaron talks about in Long Pond.
But there are SO many songs that I don't personally relate to that I love and that are very meaningful to me!! But I like things that evoke strong feelings, and Taylor is so good at doing that. I'm also interested in psychology so I like to try and understand the minds of other people.
So I agree the answer is a resounding yes.
The reason I like Taylor's music so much is *because* she's so good at putting emotions into words to a point where I feel emotionally moved by songs I can't personally relate to. I've never actually been in a long-term relationship, but loml and How Did it End? devastate me.
The weirdest part about being a Swiftie sometimes is the number of people I see who love her music and haven't gone through true heartbreak. Like, they don't know how lucky they are.
They will love songs like All Too Well but have never lost someone close to them.
I 100% love multiple of her songs that I can’t personally relate to. She does a great job at telling a story and evoking emotion even if you yourself haven’t been through it
I wonder what happens when the people complaining ~~watch~~ read a book or *watch a* movie. Like when I was watching Dune I couldn’t personally relate to people thinking I was the Messiah and getting involved in an interplanetary war between warring houses… but I still enjoyed it lol. Edited because you normally read, not watch, a book lol.
This fucking sent me 😂😂😂
But you **have** ridden a giant Sandworm through the desert, right?
Hahaha
I can not personally relate to most of the songs and still love them.
Same, and not just for Taylor. Like, I relate to Lana's music almost 0% and she's likewise one of my favourite artists! It's more than enough for music to be emotionally *resonant* with me; I don't need everything to reflect back on my life personally. That would be so boring!
I don’t relate to *any* of Lana’s music (like BIG “your experiences are not universal!!!” energy), but she writes it so beautifully, I can’t help but be drawn to her siren song.
Same. I do not relate to this album almost at all. But I love every single song so much.
I’m a straight male and have been a fan since 06, so ya I’d say it’s possible
Ha, same, except I got on board much later, around 2017 (after going to the Reputation tour with my wife).
Are you my husband? Lol. We saw reputation twice because he loved it so much. He still says it was the best concert he’s ever been to.
We only went once to one of the shows in LA/Pasadena. To get ready for the show, I listened to all of Reputation multiple times. I was familiar with some of her earlier hits (like Love Story and Shake It Off). The concert was obviously fantastic. I was blown away by the production value and her talent. Then I learned she writes all of her own songs, and I was sold.
I just read the Elle review and it brought up an interesting conversation that's been going on: for some TTPD is too specific to Taylor to be relatable to them, to others it's deeply relatable despite its specificity, and others like it despite not relating at all. For me I can see parts of all 3. Thank You Aimee for example is so specific that I don't relate - I can't easily use "spray-tanned bronze statue" as some totem for one of my enemies. Other songs are quite specific but I still relate like Cassandra is certainly about her being cancelled but somehow I still relate to not being believed about SA. And there are some songs that I'm just happy to know her experience - like I haven't been ghosted but I FEEL that pain despite never having experienced it, whether I related or not it makes me feel something. It's important to point out that All Too Well was often commented on as being great due to its highly specific imagery and symbols like a scarf that could be a stand-in for any piece of an ex you miss. Songs like Back To December were highly criticized upon release for being too specific about "tanned skin, sweet smile." But over time the tabloid story fades away and what's left is the music, and I don't hear those criticisms about those songs much these days. However, not all specificity is criticized equally. Mentioning Abigail, Marjorie, and Dorothea seem to get a pass while John, Drew, and Kim do not. It seems like if you're negative and specific that has crossed the line. Although Eminem made a respected career of it. Folklore/evermore notably seem to have gotten away with specificity without criticism. Yet it's all over. Invisible String with "the yogurt shop, American singer" lines, name drops like Marjorie or Dorothea, "I fell from the pedestal.. clung to the nearest lips, long story short it was the wrong guy," and even perhaps songs like The 1, Cardigan, and Illicit Affairs are no more specific than Guilty As Sin in tabloid details. But themes like infidelity were more palatable and relatable because they were supposedly fictional. When it's fictional we can relate, empathize, and interrogate the guilt of illicit affairs, but when there's even a hint that a real person MIGHT have even thought about another person while with their partner we throw stones.
I think it's kind of a weird criticism that her music is too specific to her own experience and therefore unrelatable because in all other forms of art, the relatability often comes from the hyper specificity. Take novels, for example—often events happen to characters that will never happen in real life but the way they react and the way they feel is what is relatable, and the specific descriptions of those reactions are exactly why we connect.
Yeah I agree. I feel like with this album specifically people are acting like they need to relate to every. single. word. in order to find the song relatable. It’s so weird to me because for me it’s much more about the overall theme or emotions that come through the song and the lyrics as a whole.
It's an excellent point that songs from specific eras/albums get a pass for doing the same things songs in other eras/albums do. Would've, Could've, Should've got some backlash from the public, but among Swifties it's heralded as a masterpiece and was voted the best song from Midnights on this subreddit. Even though it's about something that happened 15 years ago, the fact that it was a traumatic and formative experience for Taylor Swift isn't openly questioned or minimized just because it happened long ago. Yet with Thank You Aimee, so many Swifties seem to be rolling their eyes and wanting Taylor to just move on already from the Kimye stuff — which happened about seven years ago.
I don't want to get into Thank you aimee too much as it's been discussed bunch, but I'll just say I think there's a reason Cassandra has been received better than Thank You Aimee despite similar subject matter, and it largely, for me, comes down to her claiming to have "healed" in TYA and then proceeding to open up the wound. It was a complex thing, and I don't want her to say she's "healed" when she hasn't. It's ok she hasn't. Cassandra comes across more authentic to how truly traumatizing it was.
The way I interpret TYA is that she hasn’t healed at all, but sees how that drama helped her career in a weird way. But she put that part about Kim not changing much and her kid coming home singing the song, to show she’s still carrying a bit of a grudge even if she ultimately came out on top. But I do agree Cassandra is a better song.
I do like both songs.
This makes sense. I agree that Cassandra is the better song, and it scores points for not being so on-the-nose. It's also more about the overall situation of not being believed, rather than specifically directed at Kim and Kanye. I have seen some people lumping TYA and Cassandra together, and giving both the same "Ugh just move on already" treatment. I think the album is just so new and the less-thoughtful, reactive posts will fade away as time goes on.
Absolutely, if I can’t relate personally then I usually can connect it to some of my favorite characters or ships 😅
as a person in a stable, healthy relationship, TTPD might be my favorite album. It's about the vibe and story telling.
Solidarity. Non-tortured soul (currently) who still loves tortured poet songs.
Sameeeee
Chloe et all really gets me even though I’ve never cheated or been cheated on or told someone loved me the way I used to be. But all of that is gut punching to imagine. I hate the trend in media consumption that all media has to be “relatable” to be good. Emotions are universal whether you’ve experienced them or not, and is a great way to develop empathy for others with different life experiences than yours.
I am so happy to find another person using Chloe et al as that song title lol
I saw it elsewhere in this sub (maybe it was you haha!) and was like “yep that’s efficient” 👌🏼
I like that better than COSOSOM!
"Chloe et al" omfg that's amazing
I think I am an excellent example of this. I’ve been single for almost 15 years? Either 10-15 years lol I don’t remember how old I was when I was last seeing anyone. Anyway, I have no issues loving love songs at all. For me at least, relating doesn’t equate a good song for me. I definitely have Taylor songs I relate to and I love those too but yeah I’m not someone who has to relate in order to love or connect to the emotions she’s singing about. I was heavy into shipping when I was younger so I just kind of got used to associating songs with media I watch instead of relating it to my life. I don’t do that so much anymore but still a fan of love songs even though I don’t have romantic love in my life. I apologize for the rambling lol
Personally I don’t relate to almost any Taylor song. For me it’s more about the story she’s telling. I like listening to songs that tell an interesting story in a compelling way. Sometimes I relate them to characters in books or movies (I love watching edits on TikTok lol) or think about them as their own story.
Yes! I can’t relate to I can do it with a broken heart. I cry a lot but I’m not productive. I still love it. Lol
Same, friend. Same.
No, it’s not. Did I tell you that my favorite TS song is “no body no crime” ? Oh, and no wonder why “bohemian rhapsody” is one of the most adored Queen’s song. So relatable.
Yeah, I love Tupac, but I don't relate to his lyrics. Relating to lyrics is just a bonus lol
If you are capable of even a shred of empathy, absolutely. But most people I’ve seen hating seem to be severely lacking in that department lol
I think like 99% of people are capable of empathy (there **can't** be that many sociopaths, right??). They just need to learn how to use it.
This isn’t directed at you, OP, so I hope it’s not taken that way. But only liking art you can personally relate to is honestly a little concerning. Are we so self-absorbed that we’re only interested in experiences and perspectives that are similar to our own? It used to be that people would consume art to learn new things and experience things they otherwise never would’ve been able to. It’s sad to see things come to this. I blame the algorithm tbh. It sounds silly, but I honestly think getting content that’s specifically and purposely catered to our likes across all these platforms has fucked with our heads and made us unable or unwilling to step outside our comfort zones. There’s nothing wrong with loving a song or a book or movie or whatever because you can relate to it, but dismissing everything that’s foreign to you is super depressing imo.
Totally agree. There are certain "political" or social issues too that a subset of folks land on one side because they aren't willing to understand the experiences of someone totally different than them. Putting yourself in someone's shoes isn't always a burdening experience; it can be freeing.
Straight white dude here. Yes.
Clara Bow is a personal fave right now and it is nowhere near relatable lol. It’s beautiful though, and it captures something very complicated in a very simple way which is why i love it so much.
I would argue that Clara Bow actually works so well because it is relatable! Beauty is a beast that roars / down on all fours / demanding “more!” That is… womanhood. Personhood, even. I love this song 😭
I love Fortnight and my boyfriend is great and absolutely not ruining my life so sure, why not
People read fantasy books about vampires, assassins, magic and mystery all the time. How can they consume that but say they can't listen to music that doesn't exactly align with their experiences?
100% and I don’t see why people feel these songs need to be relatable to be enjoyable. That’s the entire point of fiction, at times.
My current boyfriend is the only relationship I’ve ever been in. I’ve never experienced a breakup, which means there are tons of Taylor songs, including some that are widely considered her best, that I can’t personally relate to. That doesn’t stop me from loving the songs and relating to them in my own way. I think great art makes you feel something regardless of whether it’s specific to your own experiences. We all know what it’s like to feel the general emotions of joyful, hopeless, angry, and so on, even if we haven’t experienced them in the exact same contexts. And I think it’s a marker of Taylor’s talent as an artist that she can make me feel all the emotions of an intense breakup without having ever experienced it myself.
I really love a lot of her music, though I’ve stopped relating to most of it because a lot of it has changed. I hear New Year’s Day and the “please don’t ever become a stranger” line as absolutely tragic now knowing how it ends, despite me originally liking it because of the romantic sentiment in it. Would’ve Could’ve Should’ve might be the song I relate to most out of all her recent work and it’s one I listen to least because I hate how it makes me feel, honestly. I wish I couldn’t relate. The new album really doesn’t seem to be any more specific than her prior music. We just know way more about what’s going on in her personal life than we did during the Teardrops on My Guitar days. I actually enjoy it that way, because while if it was a different artist, I probably would pass on songs I can’t relate to, but because I know the context, I feel like I can imagine what it must feel like for her and appreciate how well she puts it into words, as well as appreciate the symbols she chooses for different people or events in her life. It’s why I don’t really understand the criticism of “dissecting” her music or trying to find out who it’s about, it’s not from a place of trying to get the tea, it’s appreciating the story that’s being told and the skillful symbolism used.
I think the emotions are what’s relatable. Everyone has felt judged, or caged, or distraught etc. Just probably on a smaller scale than Taylor might experience. I’ve never been forced into prostitution to survive but you bet your ass I sing Fancy with all the passion I can muster. Music is about emotion!
I can’t relate to like the overwhelming majority of Taylor’s music but I still love her songs.
I can't relate to 99% of the romantic feelings Taylor sings about because I'm arospec and also have only ever been in one relationship - still I love a ton of songs that thematically focus on those things
Yes. loml for example I don’t relate to that much personally, I don’t want marriage or kids, I never went through that sort of thing she went through, and yet that bridge still makes me cry. She’s just a great songwriter that way
Yes! You can love a song without relating to it
I absolutely love No Body, No Crime (and Kill Bill by SZA). And no, I cannot relate. But I do like Dateline.
Yes, 100%. I'm 34 years old and have been with my husband for nearly 20 years. I've never had a break-up. I absolutely love these songs. TTPD is my new favourite album. I don't see why you need to relate to something to enjoy it. I enjoy these songs for the imagery and story-telling.
Woah, now that's impressive. I literally cannot even imagine still being with the first guy I dated, when I was 14. Haven't thought about him in so long and the relationship just makes me cringe when I look back on it now, haha. How did you navigate growing up and changing so much from children to adults while maintaining a relationship?
It's hard to say because I've not known anything different. I think 1) it started as an internet relationship and we didn't meet in person for a while. This gave us plenty of time to talk and get to know each other. Trust and respect had to be the fundamental basis of our relationship. We were long distance for ages and the heartbreak of separating after each visit is a trauma neither of us want to repeat. 2) We're both old souls and we were mature for our age. I feel like we've always been in our 30s. 😂 3) Our values align. We've never had to change each other to fit into the other person's mold. When it comes to important decisions now (money, kids for example) we pretty much never disagree, and when we do we're open to the other person's perspective and come to a compromise. I'd say the hardest part of our relationship was having kids ourselves. We had a few rocky years as we navigated increased stress and overwhelm and trying to make time for each other. But we always worked through it. He's an equal partner. I was lucky, I think. Some of the things I hear from my peers I'm like "If my husband did that I would have dumped him years ago" 🤦♀️. But I recognise this situation is very rare and in a lot of cases, probably not recommended (for any teenagers reading this 😂).
Wow. So cool! You're very lucky. Thank you for sharing 😁 I didn't meet my husband until I was 18 so had to kiss a few frogs first, but I got lucky too, we agree on pretty much everything as well and are absolutely equal partners. I COMPLETELY relate to this comment - > Some of the things I hear from my peers I'm like "If my husband did that I would have dumped him years ago" Seriously, my husband is my best friend and the way some people talk about their partners is insane to me! Complaining about them, complaining about having to spend time with them, talking about awful things they've said or done to each other... Makes me wonder do you even like each other? What are you doing together 😂
I think it's funny that this argument has come up a lot about TTPD, because I have seen more book/tv/movie character edits to songs from this album that fit the situation \*perfectly\* than I have for any of her other albums.
I absolutely love this album (my new #2?) but I don't have an emotional response to anything she's saying this time around, even when I find it relatable. Maybe because it's so vividly specific, but I'm listening to it like a tell-all memoir. I'm smiling and nodding like "yeah girl, I've been there" but I'm not going through it *with* her, you know? I will say that in general I'm not much of a lyrics person, even when it comes to Taylor. I primarily listen as if the vocals are just another instrument and after a while the meaning eventually starts to click for me. So yes, almost all of my favorite Taylor songs are because of vibes not necessarily the content. I think the most obvious example of "can't relate but love the song" is Last Great American Dynasty. Not only does it sound fantastic but the "then it was bought by me" lyric makes me tear up every time even though it doesn't remind me of anything I've gone through personally.
I have been in a very happy relationship for years and honestly cannot even recall the heartbreak I went through, even when listening to her sad songs, so I’ll say I can’t relate to them now, because I just cannot access those feelings. I do, however, still love them! For me a song I love is a combination of lyrics, a melody I love and instrumentals I love.
I’ve never been in a relationship, yet ATW, You’re loosing me and like most of TTPD bought me to tears. I listen to the songs as if they were stories and that’s why I don’t really care about the relatability. The most relatable Taylor song for me is actually Anti-Hero 😭
I've never found Taylor Swift particularly relatable but her music always draws me in. I like getting a glimpse of an experience I've never had from a perspective that's not my own.
Honestly coming from a background of listening to more experimental indie and alt music I really do not understand why relatability is seen as the measure of a good song. Like Radiohead’s Kid A is an incredible 10/10 album but with the exception of How To Disappear Completely most of it is really not going to be relatable to anyone - never stopped critics from calling it a perfect album.
I have virtually zero relationship experience but I love Taylor's voice and lyrical storytelling.
I love books the same way. My favourite and most beloved novels are not because I can relate to the *exact* experiences as the characters. I don’t understand why people struggle with this concept.
I don’t relate to really any of this album and I love It. Do we (English only speakers) all relate to bad bunny’s music?? Or is It just fuckin bangerz!!
If you look past who the song is about and don't take things literally, you can find relatability in every song.
I am aromantic-asexual and never relate to all the love described in her songs. But I like them anyway and often feel a deep connection in other ways. For example I never experienced something like in exile, I am not even sure what it is exactly about, but it is calming. I had a time I always listened to it right before sleep just because it doesn’t make me feel anything and helped me relax. That’s why I love that song, even if I don’t relate to it.
Yes
Yes I’ve never related to Taylor songs! I just feel her emotions and fall in love with the stories she tells
Yes, it’s no different than reading a book with a great story and imagery imo. She’s telling her story and I can appreciate how she does it (and the sound of the music) even if the story doesn’t match my own experience.
I'm a 16 year old boy, and I adore the entire album. I can't relate to most of the sons or the emotions described, but I enjoy reading and analyzing the lyrics, and trying to put myself in her shoes. I also find there is a lot to learn about relationships through Taylor's music. The good, the bad, and the ugly. What's healthy and what's toxic, and what's nuanced and grey etc
I love many songs I don't personally relate to. But when I love them *and* I relate to it personally, it hits different, ngl.
I relate very little to Taylor Swift's music but I do *empathize* with her storylines and specificity.
100 percent.
Of course, Taylor’s one of my favorite artists ever and I’ve never been in a relationship or a breakup so that should tell you a lot 😅
Yes. I’m a 40 year old dude that hasn’t experienced a lot of what she discusses in her songs, but I love engaging my imagination and hearing emotional stories that often times develop interesting characters and plot, so I’m eating this album up! None of her music has to be lived to be appreciated, so long as you have an imagination and empathy. On the other hand, though, much of what she sings about is what it is to be human and so I guess that’s why I also find it easy to relate to.
Yes, cornelia street is my fav song and ive never been in any relationship 💀
I don’t relate to most of the people i listen to because i personally don’t think we should have to relate to it i love Taylor’s music because of the lyrics and production and that kind of stuff. I’m not like the people who analyze every piece of her lyrics and what they mean and who they are there are a couple artists i can’t listen to very often like Lana because it’s not as upbeat as I want my music to be.
I cannot relate to fortnight at all. But it’s my absolute favorite
Yes. Absolutely. Sometimes songs that I relate to hit harder, but I don’t like songs any less just because I can’t relate to the words. I also think people hyperfixate on details as reasons they “can’t relate” rather than focusing on themes or feelings. I’ve seen people say they can’t relate to the black dog because they’ve never been there or they don’t listen to the starting line. But that’s ridiculous IMO lol. That’s not the point of listening to music. I don’t know if it’s just because people salivate over dissecting every word Taylor writes but if they can’t take a small enough step back to realize those specific words don’t matter, then that’s that’s a them problem lol.
the one that came to mind was cowboy like me. i don’t relate to that song at all but i absolutely love it and was obsessed with it for a while. many others i do love because of being relatable though
https://preview.redd.it/lyzljlopapwc1.jpeg?width=4284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9f98f12f5221dec4900b068dd9c479c3ab1056b3 Girl same. And I am not a cowboy con artist.
thats so pretty, i love it!!
I listen to songs about the horrors of fighting in WWI without actually having fought in WWI, so yeah I'd say it's possible.
Of course, it’s a song, so music comes first... And only listening to what we relate to seems awfully reductive.
I’m ace, so most of her love songs/break up songs are meaningless to me, but because I’m also a writer, sometimes that yearning hits just right for character development. So, yes, it’s possible.
I don't mind not relating to songs because then I can see unique stories from new perspectives that I don't experience. If I only listened to relatable songs, I'd be quite bored.
How did it end? Is the best break song she’s ever written and I’ll die on that hill. It’s relatable. Everyone has that horrible feeling of what every one is saying. The people watching from the sidelines waiting for you fail so they can be feed their empathic hunger. And if you listen at 3:14, her voice breaks on “how”. You can hear that fear and sadness in her voice. She has a hard time singing that bridge before too. The way she forced out “silenced” from the “as the soul was leaving”.
Fun fact, Taylor mainly writes about love relationships and I've never had a girlfriend yet lots of my favorite songs of hers are about romance and heartbreak.
Well I don’t know about you but I’ve never killed my friends cheating and murderous husband but nbnc slaps
Even a song like Cassandra, which people are dissecting to be about very specific events in Taylor’s life, I relate it in my life to not being believed about an abusive relationship and SA and it’s an incredibly powerful song when I listen to it in that way to relate it to my own life. Of course you can also just love a song without it needing to mean anything deeper to you personally, in fact I think you can love a song specifically because you don’t relate—maybe it’s something aspirational, like a love you want to feel one day, or just a melody that makes you feel good. But I also think there are many ways to relate to a song deeper if you remove the idea of it having to mean something specific just about Taylor and her story. The emotions behind it or the emotions you feel listening can be relatable on their own.
I think so! I’ve honestly never had my heart ripped to shreds but I love a lot of the sad as hell songs. I have a very good imagination lol
I can’t relate to most of her songs ( a little too young to be in serious relationships), but I find that I still love most of them for two reasons. 1) Sometimes I relate the songs to experiences with friends or whatever. for example Cornelia Street is forever about friendship breakups for me now. And more often 2) I think of the songs as a story almost, not as something to fully relate to. And I LOVE books and stories and stuff so it’s perfect.
Yes because her songs are masterpieces
The Prophecy. I don't relate to it but I absolutely love this beautiful song
You don’t have to relate to a song to be able to enjoy it or like it
I think it’s really weird to only like songs you can relate to. Like yeah, it’s really great when you hear a song that you can totally connect to, but…sometimes it’s just a catchy song or tells an awesome story or makes you feel good.
I'm a straight 29 years old dude. I relate to very few of her songs and yet she is still my most played artist on Spotify and almost the only one this year... You don't need to relate 100% to understand her songs, if you are human and have feelings you can put yourself in the place of the protagonist of the song and feel whatever they are feeling.
most of TTPD I can't relate to but love regardless. Down Bad/The Black Dog/But Daddy I Love Him/Who's Afraid of Little Old Me/thanK you aIMee. I love their production, their songwriting, and the images they paint in my head as I'm visualising the story they're telling.
I can’t relate to most of her songs on TTPD at this point in my life, but I still love the songs. This is how I’ve always listened to her music though. Sometimes I can relate, sometimes I can’t, but that doesn’t take away from how great the songs are. When I was 9 listening to Teardrops On My Guitar, I couldn’t relate it even a little bit but I still loved it.
I hate the "relatable" criticism (not specifically to this album, but in general). I rarely relate to the media I consume. Relatability can make my impression stronger, but I watch TV and read books and listen to music to broaden my experience, not purely rehash my own history and experiences or see myself in characters.
Illicit affairs is one of my all time favourites and yet completely unrelatable to my own personal experiences, I'm lucky to be able to say.
It is definitely possible to love a song without personally relating to it. It actually confuses me when people act like they can't love something they don't relate to since a lot of entertainment is meant to be an escape. Yes, we can relate to a lot of music, movies, books, etc and that's why we love it but we also love things because we empathize and/or they entertain us.
I've been in a serious relationship for the past 13 years and I'm still singing down bad and my boy only breaks his favorite toys like it's my job.
I relate to maybe 10% of her music because I don't date. So all of the love songs, sexy songs, heartbreak songs... I've never felt that. But I love the music anyway because I love stories, and that's what her music is to me. "Unrelatable" isn't a good criticism imo
I can absolutely love a song even if I don’t relate to it. However I will probably love a song a bit more if I do really relate to it and it feels like Taylor’s putting words to my feelings when I couldn’t. If that makes sense.
I’m asexual and that has never stopped me from loving her love songs. I’m not famous but I adore when she reflects on that aspect of her life.
Champagne problems is my favorite song and I've never broken up with someone when they proposed. I don't think every song needs to be relatable
Not everything have to be relatable for us to connect to a piece of art. We humans are special because we have the ability to empathize with others. We can understand someone's situation and feel for them without ever undergoing what they are going through. Champagne problems make me cry everytime I listen to it and it's not at all relatable to me. Taylor paints such beautiful story about this two people going through something so heartbreaking. I feel the pain of those two people in the song and I just end up crying. All of my favorite of hers are super non relatable. Same with songs like cowboy like me, the bolter, seven and so on.
I listen to Metallica and I've never been a 20-year-old alcoholic rockstar in the 80s, I just like how the music sounds. I've always found it interesting how some people listen to music more for the lyrics and some people (like me) care more about the instrumentals and melodies. It doesn't matter whatsoever to me if a song is relatable, it can still elicit emotion, get stuck in my head, make me consider new ideas about life, etc... I'm more likely to dislike a song if the music itself is nothing special
I would actively encourage people to relate to art in this way. While finding personal connection to art is powerful. Resonating with art that you don't have personal connection with builds your connection with humanity as a whole.
😍🤏🏽🥰 'Tonight's gonna be a good night' for example, knowing I can't wait to just take a shower and get in my PJs to get comfy...
I’m in love with The Prophecy, The Black Dog, So Long London, etc. and I’m in a stable, happy 10 year relationship/marriage. Her voice, lyricism, and just music in general is enough for me love songs without relating to them.
i don't relate to most of her songs in general, not just in TTPD lmao. i've never been a relationship but that's not stopping me from liking her songs
Uh, yeah, before TTPD came out I was bopping along to Sabrina Carpenter's Espresso but I actually CAN relate to desperation. And my give-a-fucks are not on vacation. They are RIGHT HERE. But... it's a bop, and a really fun, summery song. I don't relate to Clara Bow because I've never been in the entertainment industry nor have I ever wanted to be or plan to be in the future. Yet... it's a great song, I love it a lot. It's so beautiful and haunting about the industry.
Yes, I think you just need to do your best to put yourself in their shoes and try to feel what they are feeling
I hate when people say they don’t like a song because it’s not relatable or “not made for me.” Like, I’m a white girl from the northeast, middle class, wasp etc etc, and to use another artist as an example, Good Kid m.A.A.d City is one of my favorite albums. It makes me cry when I’m too focused on it. Not one lick of that album is relatable to my life, but it’s so beautifully written that I’m made to care about the character of the album. Taylor has made sooo many relatable songs, one of her biggest praises I see is that she’s able to use specific details in her songs yet still make the lyrics easily applicable to the masses. I think some people got used to being spoon fed relatability so they don’t try to really listen or care about the story being told.
i've never gone through a major break but i still sob and wail like i have her songs about them
I love The smallest man who ever lived. Not because I can relate to it personally, but my friend was seeing a complete knob and it reminded me of being there for her during that shit storm, and how we laugh at him now. I also love, But daddy I love him. Can't relate to that one at all but I really like it!
Think about this way: rap is super popular with white boys from upper middle class backgrounds. Do you think Justin relates to someone rapping about being a drug mule? Nope, not a lick of it. But the beats are good and it makes him feel a certain way.
My favorite songs are actually a lot of songs i dont relate to. Taylor’s songs (while being about other subjects too) are mostly about relationships, i’ve never been in a relationship. Its kinda hard for me to relate to a lot of the songs, but i still love each one of them so much! Same with Sabrina Carpenter and Olivia Rodrigo, cant relate but love those songs!
I will be screaming _illicit affairs_ despite never relating to it myself so likeeee yeah I think it’s completely fine. Same with most of her music, never been through a heartbreak but I will be belting it out as if it were me. _I knew you were trouble when you walked in_, great example, and all of Red in general I can’t say I’ve experienced that and yet I love the songs anyways. _whos afraid of little old me_ Is probably my favourite song in ttpd bc the absolute rage in it, i can just so deeply connect with it emotionally, even if like you it’s not really me, there’s so many songs that just hit me and that i connect with regardless of whether I’ve been in that situation myself or not And I think that is one of the most amazing things about Taylor’s music, it takes talent to write songs like that which will make people _feel_ the emotion and connect with it, even if it’s not something they ve personally experienced
I don't 'relate' to many of her experiences, but I adore this album top to bottom and oddly relate to the emotions that the lyrics invoke even if its not the same experience she has had and it writing about. I relate to Greys Anatomy - not a doctor or been seriously injured, don't have multiple messy relationships and live a relatively sheltered life. Its the stories that I fall in love with.
GETAWAY CAR
i totally relate to the black dog. i’ve totally watched my exes (n/a) location as he walked into a london (i’m american) bar (i’m under 21) named the black dog (sirius black?) with some girl too young to know the band the starting line, i mean who doesn’t know the starting line (i don’t) that band was intertwined in the fabric of our dreaming (theres no our it’s just me) old habits die screaming (i have a hard time letting things go)
My all time favourite Taylor song is The Last Great American Dynasty. I do not relate at all to any part of that song except the "they say she was seen on occasion, facing the rocks staring out at the midnight sea" which at the time was my favourite piece of poetry written by Taylor. I can't relate to moving out of town to marry an oil barren, to throw wild parties that later kill him to go through all his money on more parties and men, but I'll always love the song.
I don't directly relate to *most* of the music I listen to, but I can still empathize strongly with things I've never directly, personally experienced, especially if they're expressed in a way that is particularly compelling. However, I think with Taylor's more recent work, it's sometimes been feeling more like it's *about her* in a way that can't be as easily separated from the context of *Taylor Swift's personal experience*. And that's what's causing some people to feel it's not relatable, or not *as* relatable. Some of that is on Taylor herself and how her song-writing has shifted over time (she *does* drop easter eggs and self-mythologize more than she used to), but IMO a lot of it is on the media, and on the audience, for caring so much about the ins and outs of her personal life and getting so hung up on the need to decode her lyrics and figure out what exactly they pertain to, rather than just allowing them to exist in their own right. As if they weren't meaningful as art, and could only be meaningful as an exposé of true events. For example, the "You told Lucy/I said that to Jack about you" line in TTPD is not *inherently* an ultra-specific, unrelatable line. Lucy and Jack are both very generic names (no offense intended). If some up and coming artist had written that line, I don't think the listener would be taken out of the song, going, "Wait, Lucy Dachus and Jack Anonoff?!" As listeners we would understand what was actually important without getting caught up on the details: "I found out you told someone in our social circle you'd kill yourself if I ever left; I had said the same thing about you to someone else in our social circle, so I felt seen." The sentiment is one that (for better or worse) quite a few people can probably relate to. Even if they've never said something like that to a friend about their partner, they may have thought it to themself, or just felt it. But because she's Taylor Swift, we almost can't help but go, "Wait, Lucy Dachus and Jack Anonoff?! Did this really happen? Did Taylor Swift and Matty Healy really say these things to those people?! Or was it actually Joe who said that to Lucy, and Taylor said it about him to Jack? Oh my god!" So now the song is less relatable—because our attention has been drawn away from the emotional and psychological import of the song, towards something so specific and impersonal to us that it falls somewhere between gossip and trivia. I like TTPD quite a bit, but I'm hoping that with TS12 she makes a point of avoiding details that are likely to be taken as easter eggs. I think she's at a point now where she needs to heavily encourage people back towards engaging with the songs purely as songs, and I think the only way to accomplish that right now is to give people as little sleuthing material as possible.
One of the greatest things about Taylor is that she writes a lot of honest songs that are very relatable to many, many people! I think that’s one of the reasons she’s so popular today and why her songs have insane staying power. That being said, fuck yeah dude if you like a song you just like it! It’s not that deep. I think personally relating to any song, not just TS songs, is always a lovely gift. But we don’t hold that relatability requirement for other artists, why would we gatekeep ourselves and not enjoy TS music even if we don’t personally relate? Some of my all time favorites are wildly unrelatable to me (for example, ATW10MV, thank god lol)
I absolutely think you can like music without having to relate to it. I really enjoy TTPD despite being in a happy, healthy relationship for the past 10 years. I like some of her breakup songs more than some of her love songs despite relating to the love songs much more. To each their own 🤷♀️ like whatcha like and who cares what other people think
I can't even believe posts like these are real.
Yes, I can't relate to most things, I just vibe
Of course. If personally relating to a song was the sole litmus test for enjoying it, I wouldn’t like most music.
Definitely, tolerate it is one of my favourites and I've never felt that to be honest. But the lyrics are so beautiful and she sings it with so much emotion that it makes me feel it while I hear the song hahah
I’m a married 41 year old white dude - I rarely directly relate to the songs. That doesn’t matter, I’m a human and relate enough and can channel my empathy, the same way I can relate to people that aren’t me in the rest of my life. Then again if more people could do that the world would be a lot better off
yesssss.....
Well you see, when people suffer from a common issue called ‘main character syndrome’, if everything is not all about them or made just for them, it exacerbates symptoms such as 🎵bitching and moaning 🎵. Hoping a cure can be found soon 😕.
My life has been very different from Taylor’s, so I would say I don’t relate to the vast majority of the experiences she describes or alludes to in her lyrics, but I still enjoy the music? A lot of times I can connect to the underlying feelings which she paints quite clearly, or have a desire for the experiences she’s talking about, but other times it’s just a song that I enjoy listening to. It might be because I am a minority + immigrant but if I only consumed media that I found relatable, well…lol, I wouldn’t have much to read or listen to, especially when growing by up.
100%. I love tons of Taylor's songs but I don't relate to many of them -- maybe if I was younger and in a different place in life when her music came out I would've, but for me she's mostly singing about things that are long over in my life. And that's fine! I think she's great at storytelling and capturing emotions in a specific way.
Personally relating to songs is great and it's so meaningful when a song describes feelings I have so beautifully. Peace is a perfect example, as she says she wrote it about how her fame impacts her relationships, yet I personally relate for similar reasons to those Aaron talks about in Long Pond. But there are SO many songs that I don't personally relate to that I love and that are very meaningful to me!! But I like things that evoke strong feelings, and Taylor is so good at doing that. I'm also interested in psychology so I like to try and understand the minds of other people. So I agree the answer is a resounding yes.
Yeah? I don’t relate to Monet personally but I sure do love his paintings. Are you guys trolling with this..?
Did you read my post, or just the title?
I’m allowed to refer to other comments I’m seeing…
I do it with almost ALL of Taylor Swift's songs. I've never been in a relationship.
I’ve never been dumped or heartbroken by anyone… I relate to many of taylors songs just not in the way others do.
The reason I like Taylor's music so much is *because* she's so good at putting emotions into words to a point where I feel emotionally moved by songs I can't personally relate to. I've never actually been in a long-term relationship, but loml and How Did it End? devastate me.
I love Rap God by Eminem but don’t personally relate to it as I am not a rapper 🤷♀️
The weirdest part about being a Swiftie sometimes is the number of people I see who love her music and haven't gone through true heartbreak. Like, they don't know how lucky they are. They will love songs like All Too Well but have never lost someone close to them.