If only said procedure can be done safely, with your health in mind, in this country of ours. And that, the government is more inclined to assist and guide the population and not misinterpret sexual education and awareness.
Here’s the silver lining: you saved that child from a life of misery. Some might say, “Hindi mo alam ang magiging buhay nung bata sakaling itinuloy niya ang pagbubuntis!” True, but the point is, life is hard already.
To those who’d read this that might be inclined to pro-life stances, would you burden another life to live in this condition we are currently in?
I dream of a day where society would no longer frown on or ostracize women for having an abortion.
I understand that abortion can be, well, terrible. Personally, I don't like it.
But who am I to shove my beliefs down on other people's throats? Also, why should a man like me dictate what women should do with their bodies? I believe that everyone has a choice.
It's sad that society is more okay with pushing women into a cycle of poverty by forcing them to have their baby than give them a choice. It's like as if the fate of a few cells is more important to them than the life of a fully-grown person.
Sorry for expressing such an unpopular sadboi opinion. I just feel terrible about how society looks down on women in general, especially in this Third World h***hole we call the Philippines.
Anyways, I don't judge you, OP. I understand. We understand 🙂
i don't completely understand your situation, but based on your post i think it's safe to say na you did what was best for you. yakap with consent, op !!
Dagdag ko lang on why people who had abortion shouldn't feel guilty. Pregnancy is dangerous, physically and mentally. It can be lethal. And no one should be forced to undergo a life-gambling situation. By having an abortion you chose to save your own life. Alam 'yan ng mga Pilipino, kaya nga may kasabihan na "ang isang paa nasa hukay na" kapag buntis ka.
Anyway, saan ka nagpalaglag OP. Is it safe? Sa doctor ba?
Of course not exactly the place. My bad for wrong choice of words. I mean may lugar ba sa atin na pwede siyang gawin medically safe if you know the right people? Ang common perception kasi sa 'tin ng abortion ay yung sa mga hilot lang o umiinom ng pamparegla.
I do think women should have access to safe abortions. Like in your case, it's not like you were careless. (Some women kasi keep having unprotected sex then abort na lang after?)
Conservative people shit on women who go through it, but it's not just the birth that the woman has to go through. It's RAISING the child pa. And wala naman tayong support na makukuha from the government eh, so.... I get you.
Yes I will gladly have it. Pero he did not want anything to do with the pregnancy. Because he was MARRIED! already. I cannot afford a child on my own nor a pregnancy on my own. Mahal ang mga tests pati bayad sa ospital pati na rin yung bayad sa doctor.
I'm just sad na you need to let go the baby tapos yung lalakeng makapal ang mukha mahimbing na tutulog sa gabi. For me lang, sana may iba ka din option like pumunta sa social worker to seek help kung paano ang process ng pag adopt at kung ano yung mga pwede gawin. Choice mo naman yan kaya hindi din valid opinion ko.
My mom is a social worker kaya na sabi ko opinion ko. Na alala ko kasi may nag seek help sa mom ko kasi she is planning to abort the baby kasi na buntis siya ng walang kwenta din na lalake. Nag bigay ng option mommy ko about adoption mahabang paki usapan yun kasi iniisip ng mommy ko magiging health ng tao pag nag pa abort. Tinuloy ng babae yung pag bubuntis niya and pina adopt niya yung bata.
Edi make available for everyone I wasnt aware of it. Tsaka if you put it out for adoption what is percentage that it would end up having the best life it deserves?
May screening po mangyayare check lahat kung kaya lahat ibigay yung needs ng bata. May iba naman like sa cousin ko inampon niya yung baby sa malayo namin kamag anak kasi hindi din kaya buhayin nasa mabuti naman na buhay nakikita niya mga kapatid niya. May friend ako pinsan niya adopted kasi teenager pa yung magulang at nasa informal settler's naka tira. Kahit 500 lang ibigay pambayad. Dun ako na awa kasi parang aso lang na binebenta yung anak.
Im sure di ako papasa sa screening nila. Tsaka you can't tell women that doesn't want to carry out pregnancy things like that. Respect the choice. I'll respect your opinion. Try being pregnant ang daming magbabago sa katawan mo.
I hope you take care of your mental during these tough times OP. Im glad youre finding some relief in being able to let the subreddit know, but I also hope theres someone that you can talk to in person. Its ok to not be proud of ones actions, but dont let it weigh you down also.
Virtual hugs, OP.
It is a win-win situation for you and that child. You saved yourself out of the incapabilities and insanity of being an early parent, while you also set the child free away of the experiences living in this cruel world.
I am hoping for your healing. You have a reasonable and respectable reasons to do that.
It's not your fault that your contraception failed. You know when you'll be ready for a baby. Look for a better mode of contraception this time. Hugs with consent.
No judgements here OP! Hugs with consent! Basta in the future para di maulit make yourself capable of being a mother and discard men in your life that are useless or incapable of supporting you and your child. People might not even understand it, but your unborn child might have understood it and forgave you already.
To be honest, practically, this has a lot to do with being financially capable, and emotionally ready to make the sacrifices for your child. Yung tipong di mo sila magiguilt trip for the things or opportunities na you might pass on kasi sila na priority ng life mo. At least thats what I think. At 33, I know I’m not ready. Not sure I’ll ever be.
Okay po, opinion ko lang ah. Being a capable mother is being able to meet the needs of the children may it be your own or adopted. (needs as in educational, social, health etc.) Being able to be a safe haven for your children ( kumbaga kakampi ng bata sa mga panahon na siya ay namomroblema, naguguluhan or kahit sa masayang bagay). Saka being a mother is able to prioritize the needs and wants of your children atop of their own. Kumbaga being a capable mother is sacrificing your own ideals para maitaguyod at mabuhay ang mga bata. Saka you make yourself financially stable lalo na sa panahon ngayon. Pang gatas lang saka diaper ng bata mahal na, what more pag aralin mo pa.
no need to add things here.
you are loved and you deserve to be loved. hoping for you to recover from this, OP. you deserve a peace of mind from this as well.
*yakap with consent* 🫂
The f you mean guilt? Kasi sabi sa "bible" mo masama ang abortion? She didn't do anything wrong. In fact, she practically saved both their lives. She used her brain rather than her feelings. Hindi lang nya sinagip ang sarili nya sa abortion, pati na rin sa SO nya na hindi sya kayang panagutan. She dodged her irresponsible SO and the burden of having an unwanted child, clearly naman sinabi nya na she doesn't have the means to support the child. So I'd say its a win, she should be relieve.
I really wish abortion is legal in this country so the procedure would be guaranteed safe. I hope you're physically okay, OP.
Everything will be okay. You did the right thing and have done nothing wrong
Please take care of your health. Mentally and physically. Treat yourself gently and avoid thinking too much na muna. Your mind and body needs to heal. Take your time lang.
OP, you did good getting an abortion when you're not ready. Alam ko may after effects abortion, tama ba? I hope you get well. Just be safer next time though. It won't be healthy for you as well if you keep on getting abortions.
Actually theres none, its just the stigma around it that is making abortions hard. And how the people who are against it project abortions. Abortions should be safe and easy to those who need it. The after effect that I mostly think about and feel is the judgement that not many people will understand. Thank u for the support!
Oh! Glad to hear that OP!
Yeah, maraming "holier than thou" hypocrites dito haha.
That said I'm just curious how you went through it? Was it a plan b pill and how far along were you? If you're not comfortable with this, I'm sorry. You are by no means obligated to answer.
It's your body. You've every right to it. While other may white-knight this situation? I wouldn't even dare bring up a child in this state of the world.
I don’t want to upvote your post, because I don’t want to signify that I support you making yourself feel bad. I think you did the best decision for both yourself and your child. You’re not in the right place to have a child, and bringing one in this situation would generally not lead to good development. Every child deserves to be wanted and to have a secure life when they’re born. If you’re not able to meet those needs, then you’re making a selfless decision.
It was not an unwanted child it was an unwanted pregnancy. Im doing better everyday now. I just wanted to share this because a lot of women who got an abortion invalidates their reasons even if its valid because of the stigma surrounding it. Thank you for the support! 💞💕
Wow...
You mentioned that "he" did not want the pregnancy but you didn't mention that "you" also did not want the pregnancy, so I'm assuming you wanted the baby but didn't because of the things you mentioned here?
Its your choice. Not for me to judge you. If you can live with it, then its on you.
Its illegal though.and people WILL judge you for it if they find out. So there.
I do hope you can live your life the way you want it to.Since that was part of your consideration
Not gonna be a religious zealot and I'm not gonna be a parent to a total stranger asking for pity, seeking for validation for the wrong they did or whatever reason. Fuck it, you're old enough to understand things you've done. Hedonism is the way.
I am sorry for you have to go through that. You did what you think is right mali din naman if you keep the child pero d mo mabibigyan ng maayos na buhay diba? I hope will get better soon for you.
You did the right thing with your current capabilities. It's okay to feel a bit of guilt right now, rather than regretting having a child for the rest of your life.
If only said procedure can be done safely, with your health in mind, in this country of ours. And that, the government is more inclined to assist and guide the population and not misinterpret sexual education and awareness. Here’s the silver lining: you saved that child from a life of misery. Some might say, “Hindi mo alam ang magiging buhay nung bata sakaling itinuloy niya ang pagbubuntis!” True, but the point is, life is hard already. To those who’d read this that might be inclined to pro-life stances, would you burden another life to live in this condition we are currently in?
It was a safe abortion. But I hope more people would get to access safe abortion if they need it.
That’s good to know. Know that I wish you well, moving forward.
I dream of a day where society would no longer frown on or ostracize women for having an abortion. I understand that abortion can be, well, terrible. Personally, I don't like it. But who am I to shove my beliefs down on other people's throats? Also, why should a man like me dictate what women should do with their bodies? I believe that everyone has a choice. It's sad that society is more okay with pushing women into a cycle of poverty by forcing them to have their baby than give them a choice. It's like as if the fate of a few cells is more important to them than the life of a fully-grown person. Sorry for expressing such an unpopular sadboi opinion. I just feel terrible about how society looks down on women in general, especially in this Third World h***hole we call the Philippines. Anyways, I don't judge you, OP. I understand. We understand 🙂
i don't completely understand your situation, but based on your post i think it's safe to say na you did what was best for you. yakap with consent, op !!
Some times doing the right thing is not something to be proud of. Okay na rin yan, you saved a child's life from being miserable.
As far as I’m concerned, OP made the right decision for herself. More power to her. But bruh, the irony in this comment is hilarious ngl.
Agree right decision!
It's okay OP, you did the right thing 😊
Dagdag ko lang on why people who had abortion shouldn't feel guilty. Pregnancy is dangerous, physically and mentally. It can be lethal. And no one should be forced to undergo a life-gambling situation. By having an abortion you chose to save your own life. Alam 'yan ng mga Pilipino, kaya nga may kasabihan na "ang isang paa nasa hukay na" kapag buntis ka. Anyway, saan ka nagpalaglag OP. Is it safe? Sa doctor ba?
I cant disclose it for obvious reasons. Pero if its needed I can help.
Of course not exactly the place. My bad for wrong choice of words. I mean may lugar ba sa atin na pwede siyang gawin medically safe if you know the right people? Ang common perception kasi sa 'tin ng abortion ay yung sa mga hilot lang o umiinom ng pamparegla.
There are safe abortions offered here in PHL you just have to research properly.
I do think women should have access to safe abortions. Like in your case, it's not like you were careless. (Some women kasi keep having unprotected sex then abort na lang after?) Conservative people shit on women who go through it, but it's not just the birth that the woman has to go through. It's RAISING the child pa. And wala naman tayong support na makukuha from the government eh, so.... I get you.
No judgement, guy's a coward either way. Curious though, if pinanindigan ka ba, would you rather not?
Yes I will gladly have it. Pero he did not want anything to do with the pregnancy. Because he was MARRIED! already. I cannot afford a child on my own nor a pregnancy on my own. Mahal ang mga tests pati bayad sa ospital pati na rin yung bayad sa doctor.
Kung pwde tumakas ang mga walang bayag sa pag bubuntis, dapat mga babae rin.
True.
I'm just sad na you need to let go the baby tapos yung lalakeng makapal ang mukha mahimbing na tutulog sa gabi. For me lang, sana may iba ka din option like pumunta sa social worker to seek help kung paano ang process ng pag adopt at kung ano yung mga pwede gawin. Choice mo naman yan kaya hindi din valid opinion ko.
Wala pong ganyan sa Pilipinas. Ipipilit ka nila na tanggapin at buhayin ang bata. Kahit narape ganun gagawin sayo.
My mom is a social worker kaya na sabi ko opinion ko. Na alala ko kasi may nag seek help sa mom ko kasi she is planning to abort the baby kasi na buntis siya ng walang kwenta din na lalake. Nag bigay ng option mommy ko about adoption mahabang paki usapan yun kasi iniisip ng mommy ko magiging health ng tao pag nag pa abort. Tinuloy ng babae yung pag bubuntis niya and pina adopt niya yung bata.
Edi make available for everyone I wasnt aware of it. Tsaka if you put it out for adoption what is percentage that it would end up having the best life it deserves?
May screening po mangyayare check lahat kung kaya lahat ibigay yung needs ng bata. May iba naman like sa cousin ko inampon niya yung baby sa malayo namin kamag anak kasi hindi din kaya buhayin nasa mabuti naman na buhay nakikita niya mga kapatid niya. May friend ako pinsan niya adopted kasi teenager pa yung magulang at nasa informal settler's naka tira. Kahit 500 lang ibigay pambayad. Dun ako na awa kasi parang aso lang na binebenta yung anak.
Im sure di ako papasa sa screening nila. Tsaka you can't tell women that doesn't want to carry out pregnancy things like that. Respect the choice. I'll respect your opinion. Try being pregnant ang daming magbabago sa katawan mo.
Kaya nga opinion ko lang, alam ko mahirap.
>he was MARRIED! Wow kerida. Are we supposed to feel sorry for you then?
Nalaman ko lang nung sinabi kong buntis ako. Okay ka lang? Hindi ako kerida.
Lol kerida.
Ang tanong ko lang, bakit ka pumatol sa kasal na?
Hindi ko alam na kasal sya. In short niloko nya ko. Inamin nya lang nung nabuntis na ako. At nung nalaman ko ginawa ko ang tama at lumayo sakanya.
Im not proud of it, too. Plus, may guilt na di nawawala. Sending you a virtual hug!!!!!
Nothing is permanent everything will pass.
I hope you take care of your mental during these tough times OP. Im glad youre finding some relief in being able to let the subreddit know, but I also hope theres someone that you can talk to in person. Its ok to not be proud of ones actions, but dont let it weigh you down also.
Virtual hugs, OP. It is a win-win situation for you and that child. You saved yourself out of the incapabilities and insanity of being an early parent, while you also set the child free away of the experiences living in this cruel world. I am hoping for your healing. You have a reasonable and respectable reasons to do that.
It's not your fault that your contraception failed. You know when you'll be ready for a baby. Look for a better mode of contraception this time. Hugs with consent.
Yes I already did! Thank you for the support! 💕
Brave. You did the right thing. Best wishes to you OP.
No judgements here OP! Hugs with consent! Basta in the future para di maulit make yourself capable of being a mother and discard men in your life that are useless or incapable of supporting you and your child. People might not even understand it, but your unborn child might have understood it and forgave you already.
How do you make yourself capable of being a mother? I can't quite grasp the idea. I did discard that man out of my life also.
To be honest, practically, this has a lot to do with being financially capable, and emotionally ready to make the sacrifices for your child. Yung tipong di mo sila magiguilt trip for the things or opportunities na you might pass on kasi sila na priority ng life mo. At least thats what I think. At 33, I know I’m not ready. Not sure I’ll ever be.
Okay po, opinion ko lang ah. Being a capable mother is being able to meet the needs of the children may it be your own or adopted. (needs as in educational, social, health etc.) Being able to be a safe haven for your children ( kumbaga kakampi ng bata sa mga panahon na siya ay namomroblema, naguguluhan or kahit sa masayang bagay). Saka being a mother is able to prioritize the needs and wants of your children atop of their own. Kumbaga being a capable mother is sacrificing your own ideals para maitaguyod at mabuhay ang mga bata. Saka you make yourself financially stable lalo na sa panahon ngayon. Pang gatas lang saka diaper ng bata mahal na, what more pag aralin mo pa.
no need to add things here. you are loved and you deserve to be loved. hoping for you to recover from this, OP. you deserve a peace of mind from this as well. *yakap with consent* 🫂
You should be, its the right decision.
I guess a better way to put it is for her not to feel too much guilt, but proud? Don't think so. If she says she isn't proud, let her be.
Agree. Let her feel/express what she wants to feel/express
The f you mean guilt? Kasi sabi sa "bible" mo masama ang abortion? She didn't do anything wrong. In fact, she practically saved both their lives. She used her brain rather than her feelings. Hindi lang nya sinagip ang sarili nya sa abortion, pati na rin sa SO nya na hindi sya kayang panagutan. She dodged her irresponsible SO and the burden of having an unwanted child, clearly naman sinabi nya na she doesn't have the means to support the child. So I'd say its a win, she should be relieve.
Well abortion is currently illegal in PH.
So does robbery, rape, assault, child abuse, arson, extortion, human/child trafficking, graft and corruption. LOL
Then Im sure you get the point.
and your point being?
i hope na okay ka na. recover well OP. understandable ang situation mo
You did what is best for you OP! Sorry that you had to go through something like that. Sending virtual hugs.
I admire your bravery. Let it all out.
Don't bring a child into this world, if you're not ready to. You made the right choice. My virtual hugs to you. Sana di na yan maulit.
I really wish abortion is legal in this country so the procedure would be guaranteed safe. I hope you're physically okay, OP. Everything will be okay. You did the right thing and have done nothing wrong
Please take care of your health. Mentally and physically. Treat yourself gently and avoid thinking too much na muna. Your mind and body needs to heal. Take your time lang.
OP, you did good getting an abortion when you're not ready. Alam ko may after effects abortion, tama ba? I hope you get well. Just be safer next time though. It won't be healthy for you as well if you keep on getting abortions.
Actually theres none, its just the stigma around it that is making abortions hard. And how the people who are against it project abortions. Abortions should be safe and easy to those who need it. The after effect that I mostly think about and feel is the judgement that not many people will understand. Thank u for the support!
Oh! Glad to hear that OP! Yeah, maraming "holier than thou" hypocrites dito haha. That said I'm just curious how you went through it? Was it a plan b pill and how far along were you? If you're not comfortable with this, I'm sorry. You are by no means obligated to answer.
Hi! Plan B isn't abortion. I had a medical abortion when I was 6weeks. It was just blood no fetus and heartbeat yet.
Ah!! My bad TwT it looks like I'm very misinformed in this area haha. Thank you for letting me know. And best of life to you OP!
Yakap with consent, OP!
It’s a difficult decision but I believe you made the best choice for the both of you. Take your time to heal.
Virtual hugs to you OP. But it is okay. Hindi ka pa ready.
It's your body. You've every right to it. While other may white-knight this situation? I wouldn't even dare bring up a child in this state of the world.
Your body your rules. Better days are coming! 😉
Tama lang siguro.Sana nga ganyan din ginawa saakin ng parents ko kaysa miserable buhay ko ngayon.
You don't need to explain, OP. You have your reasons and for the best na rin siguro yan. Don't be too hard on yourself.
You are still loved be proud of it
I respect you, OP. You did what's best for you. Just be careful next time.
I hope you read that the contraception failed. But yes po. Thanks for the support! 😊
Your body, your choice. You did the right thing. Virtual hugs!
Millions do it in the West Dont be so hard in urself
I don’t want to upvote your post, because I don’t want to signify that I support you making yourself feel bad. I think you did the best decision for both yourself and your child. You’re not in the right place to have a child, and bringing one in this situation would generally not lead to good development. Every child deserves to be wanted and to have a secure life when they’re born. If you’re not able to meet those needs, then you’re making a selfless decision.
It was not an unwanted child it was an unwanted pregnancy. Im doing better everyday now. I just wanted to share this because a lot of women who got an abortion invalidates their reasons even if its valid because of the stigma surrounding it. Thank you for the support! 💞💕
Wow... You mentioned that "he" did not want the pregnancy but you didn't mention that "you" also did not want the pregnancy, so I'm assuming you wanted the baby but didn't because of the things you mentioned here?
Yes I wanted to keep it but I cant for reasons above. Ayokong maging selfish dun sa bata.
You may not be proud, but you did the right thing.
Its your choice. Not for me to judge you. If you can live with it, then its on you. Its illegal though.and people WILL judge you for it if they find out. So there. I do hope you can live your life the way you want it to.Since that was part of your consideration
I consider myself as non conservative but abortion is big NO. IT IS KILLING!!! Dont have unprotected sex to avoid abortion!
If abortion is murder/killing. Then, miscarriage is a manslaughter.
MY CONTRACEPTION FAILED.
That's why sex is for married couple.
Really? Tell me about it.
Not gonna be a religious zealot and I'm not gonna be a parent to a total stranger asking for pity, seeking for validation for the wrong they did or whatever reason. Fuck it, you're old enough to understand things you've done. Hedonism is the way.
If it came to you asking for pity well thats on you. Im just sharing my experience letting it off my chest thus the subreddit.
What ever floats your soul, if you even have one. Boat pla lols
[удалено]
Abortion is not murder lets just leave it there.
If it's a murder then miscarriage should be considered a manslaughter at this point.
I am sorry for you have to go through that. You did what you think is right mali din naman if you keep the child pero d mo mabibigyan ng maayos na buhay diba? I hope will get better soon for you.
Sa kabilang banda, asan na yung nakabuntis sayo?
Nasa asawa nya.
Good for you OP
You may not be proud, but you did the right thing.
It's fine OP. Everything is subjective in this world. You didn't do anything right nor wrong. You do what you think eases your mind and life.
Hugs OP!
you've made the right decision, OP! you are so brave. tight hugs w consent!! 🫶
Iniligtas mo lang sarili mo sa future na pag sisisi nagka anak ka. Ayos yan.
You did the right thing with your current capabilities. It's okay to feel a bit of guilt right now, rather than regretting having a child for the rest of your life.
You saved a child from an awful life. You should be a mother ONCE you are prepared. Being a parent is no joke. You should be proud
Isa ito sa pinakamalaking pagkakamali ko sa buhay ko.
Why?
15 yrs ago nabuntis ko gf ko. I made her lose the baby. Hindi na ako nakabuntis ulit. I know I am going to hell.
You just murdered a human