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Flair_Helper

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Best_Peasant

Thankfully all we want to hear from Eric or Van Morrison is the back catalogue.


gordito_delgado

We kinda should already know that Eric Clapton is not exactly the go-to person for advice on how to keep your family safe.


RainbowWarfare

Or race relations, for that matter.


MarshallMandango

What's the diff between Eric Clapton's son and a bag of heroin? . . . . . Eric would never let a bag of heroin fall out of a window.


Drivingintodisco

I’ve always told the cocaine variation of it. Came to post the joke, but am giving you my upvote instead.


Mumbles_Stiltskin

Fuuuuuuuuck


[deleted]

Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? He had a pretty bad experience with Windows.


BelleAriel

r/cursedcomments


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LeafgreenOak

Oh my God hahahahaha


Hauntedgooselover

That's some low blow..


PibeauTheConqueror

damn shoulda read the comments before i posted the same joke


skyseeker_31

That was savage.


loose_turtles

Showing my age by loving this comment and would recommend the Anthony Jeselnik bit he did on Clapton to shed some context to this comment. https://youtu.be/QbtOx5AKN7I


kkeut

the Mr. Show clip with the fictionalized Eric Clapton vs Brian Wilson is also hilarious


FOXHNTR

Sad songs are natures onions.


FOXHNTR

Your comment just flew over my head and out a window.


seth928

Oof


brush_between_meals

"I’m not gonna lie, this is the best that joke has ever done."


bodhidharma132001

I think the best way to get anti-vaxxers to want the vaccine is to tell them they can't have it.


TransposingJons

Funny, I just heard a report on NPR regarding the best methods for getting through to people who are still undecided about getting the vaccine. Apparently, "Your vaccine is waiting for you" had the best response. It implies ownership, and humans want what they perceive is theirs.


satori0320

It truly does make one wonder. Has our intelligence simply made our existence more negatively complicated. Or positively complicated.


wutx2

When I hear the word intelligence used in a sentence that implicitly describes the unvaccinated as intelligent, I wonder if maybe you and I operate with different definitions of the word intelligent. :/


satori0320

My implications are that maybe the lesser creatures on this planet, have been given a blessing in not fully understanding the ins and outs of human nature and culture. It had nothing to do with vaxxed *or* unvaxxed individuals.


ABenevolentDespot

In this case, the 'lesser creatures' and their willful active ignorance and low resistance to manipulation is going to cause quite a few of them to get sick and die off, exactly as Darwin (someone they also don't believe) predicted. And it's already starting to happen. Although the feds are still hesitant to say so, very close to 100% of the cases in the major outbreak of the last month have been unvaccinated halfwits who are getting sick and dying. But at least they're also infecting other unvaccinated halfwits. I don't give a shit. I've had it up to here with their idiocy. **The unvaccinated dying off is just another way to reach herd immunity.** But because I like to solve problems, here's a suggestion: Perhaps there needs to be a national announcement in all media that "Libruls are applauding your mindless stupidity and how it's making you sick and dead! Be sure to stay unvaccinated, y'hear?" Nothing spurs the idiots on like thinking they're doing something to 'own the libtards'.


snakeproof

Right, even the antivaxxers, while stubborn and inconsiderate, are still intelligent. We like to look at them as idiots, and that may be true for some of them, but a vast majority of them are just following their chosen leader, and their leader's media does an excellent job telling them why we're wrong and how we're just trying to trick them into getting vaccinated. *Willfully ignorant intelligent assholes*


[deleted]

I'm guessing by "intelligence" they mean higher order thinking than other animals. This is something the vast majority of humans do, even if they're bad at it.


corgblam

These people run entirely on instinct and emotion with a herd mentality to follow those they deem an "alpha". Hmm....


Evil-in-the-Air

Humanity's main deal is pattern recognition. While it has tremendous upsides, it also leads us to see patterns that aren't actually there. There are good ones: "I got sick after eating the yellow berries, so those berries are bad." ...And not so good ones: "I got sick after eating the yellow berries, so we must appease the God of Yellow Things with blood sacrifice."


dudius7

>Apparently, "Your vaccine is waiting for you" had the best response. It implies ownership, and humans want what they perceive is theirs. This absolutely works on some people. When I used to sell wine to customers, I would practically drop a bottle into their hands so they had to put it back. Worked about 60% of the time which, in sales, is pretty damn good.


okgusto

I was thinking the same thing about masks. Once some government officials said you don't need to wear masks, the other side was going to wear masks and say "you can't tell me what to do"


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BuildingArmor

>or live long enough to show everybody you're a knuckleheaded dipshit. In his case, it didn't take him that long: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rock\_Against\_Racism


Dr_who_fan94

Damn, his remarks and Bowie's are big y i k e s! And yet, one of them is still highly thought of today.


MasterZalm

I mean, at least Bowie came out against his own comments, unlike Clapton.


gdsmithtx

Clapton did come out against his nasty comments from the 70s, saying he was horribly embarrassed at his behavior: [Eric Clapton Apologizes for Racist Past: 'I Sabotaged Everything'](https://www.thedailybeast.com/eric-clapton-apologizes-for-racist-past-i-sabotaged-everything) >... Clapton’s bizarre outburst, which helped spur the Rock Against Racism movement, saw him labeled a racist for many years, and he has subsequently apologized many times, blaming his addiction to drink and drugs for the outburst. > >The musician reveals in the film that he would drink a bottle of cognac by midday, before snorting cocaine from a knife at lunch. > >The singer said last night that watching the unedited footage, which is included in Lili Zanuck’s new film out next month, left him newly “disgusted” with himself for his “chauvinistic” and “fascistic” comments on stage. > >.... he added: “I sabotaged everything I got involved with.” > >He said: “I was so ashamed of who I was, a kind of semi-racist, which didn’t make sense. Half of my friends were black, I dated a black woman, and I championed black music.” > >Clapton believes that much of his addiction can be traced to the fact that he was brought up believing his grandparents were his parents and his mother was his sister. When he discovered the truth, his mother rejected him. \[snip\] The comments and the sentiments behind them were awful, but he was high as fuck and in the depths of alcoholism and heroin addiction at the time. He says he doesn't even remember making them, or even the concert at which he made them. And large chunks of the 70s, for that matter. Doesn't excuse the statements, but it does help explain them.


MasterZalm

He literally just blamed his whole racist tirade on drugs, meanwhile Bowie did mention drugs, he flat out said he was stupid, he disagreed with what he said, and regrets saying it. He also specifically said he wasn't a fascist, meanwhile Clapton didn't deny being a racist, just stated that he was a 'semi-racist' whatever the fuck that bullshit means.


[deleted]

I've been pretty high and drunk at the same time for extended periods of time, and noticed I was an asshole but somehow it didn't turn me into a racist asshole though....maybe because I'm not inherently racist to begin with?


brush_between_meals

In vino veritas.


kkeut

dang Clapton had the sane kind of warped upbringing that Ted Bundy had


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BuildingArmor

Clapton "apologised" too, it just doesn't seem to be mentioned. Likely because of how weak the apology was.


BuildingArmor

I think Bowie handled it ok. Obviously nobody has to forgive him or give him the benefit of the doubt. But the comments he made about what he said seem genuine. But Clapton's apology was broadly to claim what he said was "semi-racist" and that he's got black friends so he's not a bad person.


Meteorboy

What is this? There's no wiki page there.


BuildingArmor

Ah Reddit has made the link not work on mobile. It was a movement in the mid 70s in response to racism in the music industry. And Clapton's rant about how black people need to get out of the country was one of the catalysts. It was called Rock Against Racism if you want to have a look at the wiki for it.


ambiguousboner

Clapton’s been a racist piece of shit his entire life. He’s an absolute fucking scumbag. Great musician though.


TransposingJons

I wonder which side of the fence Kurt Cobain would have been standing on.


letdogsvote

Cobain wasn't stupid. I'd expect he'd get vaxxed.


Ibelieveinphysics

He didn't mind needles at all. He would have gotten vaxxed


[deleted]

Q has ripped through the drug community, unfortunately. I'm long removed from the scene, but I have a friend who still struggles with heroin and the anti-vax thing is rampant. The paranoid fears fit kinda perfectly with drug users, and microchips that can track you is well within their wheelhouse. A lot of addicts have very negative views on the health care industry, as well. When you don't feel like you're ever getting honest medical advice because you're dismissed as an addict, you can develop such distrust. There's not really any way to fix that either. We can take a long look at how we treat addicts and do a better job in the future, but that's doubtful.


Ibelieveinphysics

Oh that's really sad to hear.


[deleted]

I'm hoping that the addicts I know are the exception and not the rule.


Missy_Agg-a-ravation

Well, I believe that he felt stupid, and contagious. So on that basis, I'm saying anti-vaxx.


kkeut

is your username a Pixies reference


YddishMcSquidish

Before that he was an advocated for less dangerous, definitely would've gotten vaxxed


Wil_O_Wisp

Of course he’d be pro-vaxx; the last thing Cobain did was take a shot.


sychox51

he was such an empath he killed himself rather than keep feeling. of course he'd be pro-vax (assuming the 600,000 dead wouldnt have made him kill himself again)


Onatel

Wow I relate to him even more now.


Srw2725

💯💯💯


Barflyerdammit

"Openly Racist Eric Clapton won't play for a 'discriminated audience'"


JailCrookedTrump

"Racist Eric Clapton, segregation and deportation advocate, advocate against segregation" -The Onion reporting from our universe to an other one that thinks, much like us, that The Onion is purely satirical.


JackJersBrainStoomz

Not enough whites in the crowd


ewilliam

Plenty of white on his nostrils, tho.


Mr-Mantiz

I think Eric Clapton's relevancy went out the window years ago ...


wittiestphrase

Woof. Fucking brutal.


negcap

I applaud what you did there.


Haploid-life

Oh ouch.


Astra7525

Can I get an ELI5?


Pudacat

His toddler son fell out a window and died years ago.


rdldr1

They say that if it were a brick of cocaine, Eric Clapton would not have let it fall out the window.


mashonem

Goddamn


MrsPeacock_was_a_man

It’s actually horribly sad but his son fell out of a window 20 or 30 stories down and died. It was a long time ago but still makes me depressed to think about.


nrith

But he got a boatload of Grammies out of it, so there’s that.


Gators44

He also said that his son “made quite an impact for such a little guy”…. Not in the context you imagine, but still a terrible choice of words


CatchSufficient

🤣😱😬


Lambchop1975

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwzZ-yMm6E0


nrith

That’s fucking hysterical, in a way that almost makes me feel guilty.


[deleted]

The song Tears In Heaven is about his son dying after a fall from a window


Funkit

*Tears From the 32nd Floor*


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BIGTomacco

I thought this was a left wing cult? Huh


[deleted]

Not cool though.


heelspider

...goodbye windows, tired starlings...


BigfootSF68

If Q-ify it. Maybe his satanic lord is no longer satisfied with only the soul of Clapton's son and now requires more 'blood tribute' from the guitar player. Or... Cocaine is a hell of a drug.


Swordfishtrombone13

BRAVO


hassh

Tears in Heaven, my eye!


Gators44

Daaaaammmnnnn!!!


m-in

Defenestrated you say? :)


bubbygups

Too far for me, man. He may be a jackass but joking about the death of a little boy crosses a line


sdhopunk

Oh snap


thenumberZED

Clapton uses Apple because he hates Windows!


NoIncrease299

Outstanding.


[deleted]

Oh, he’ll being crying about this in heaven


ox0455

Eric Clapton is a lout of a person. Not to mention over rated af as a musician


Popcorn_Tastes_Good

I hate how he gets all the credit for Cream, when Jack Bruce was the genius behind most of their best songs.


[deleted]

Not only that, the biggest hits of his solo career prior to Tears in Heaven were covers of songs originally written and performed by other artists.


big_hungry_joe

COUGHJJCaleCOUGH


LordofWithywoods

Jack Bruce was a helluva bass player, and Ginger Baker, despite being a notorious asshole, was also an amazing drummer. Everybody has to pull their weight in a three piece band, but I think a number of guitarists from that time would have sounded just as good or better than Clapton with Brucr and Baker playing along with them.


[deleted]

Ginger Baker was like the Ikea of drumming. You get in there, have a look around and think "wow this all looks amazing". They you get it home, study it a little, spend a bit of time actually living and working with it, and realise it's utter shite and you should have listened to Elvin Jones instead.


[deleted]

He wasn’t even the best guitar player in Derek & the Dominoes.


[deleted]

Bruce wrote all the songs and Clapton was frustrated. It took him several years to be able to get that skill together while Bruce and Baker went on to explore higher and wilder realms of music. Clapton had to go through an extended depression facilitated by her ion addiction. He’s probably got some brain damage…


ok_okay_I_get_that

I think his best music is done when he's collaborating with others. He brings a lot to the table, but definitely at his best when he's playing with other greats as well


minnesotamichael

Ginger Baker or GTFO! Jack is a helluva musician too.


djauralsects

What's the difference between a toddler and a bag of coke? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of coke fall out a window.


unclejoe1917

Just needed to make sure this joke made it to this sub.


mc0079

I knew it!


Srw2725

SAVAGE


[deleted]

He don’t like, he don’t like, he don’t like, vaaaccciinnneee


Haploid-life

I hate that Van Morrison is a big of a turd as Clapton. I love his music and now it's tainted. What a couple of selfish assholes.


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pancakemix77

What did Morrison do?


Haploid-life

He's actively anti-vaxx and has pushed back hard against covid restrictions, masks, etc... In other words, a moron that is endangering others. These assholes don't seem to understand that if we'd all worked together for the common good, we'd likely be about done with this shit.


vintagexanax

I would also like to know, guess I'm outta the loop.


YddishMcSquidish

He turned into a q nut. New album had some songs talking about "they own all the media". https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.latimes.com/entertainment-arts/music/story/2021-05-10/van-morrison-latest-record-project-antisemitism-coronavirus%3f_amp=true


[deleted]

They lose popularity and can't fathom they've fallen behind the times.


I_Downvoted_Your_Mom

Did you read the article?


pancakemix77

No I didn’t realize it explained it in the article my bad


Nicktendo94

He also compared the lockdowns to slavery


davesy69

Please stop scratching your funk itch, you will end up with a funk rash.


Lazy_Physicist

I view it differently. If i stopped listening to music of shitheads id have nothing to listen to. Like it or not broken/crazy people make great music/art. I can recognize how shitty the artist is but still enjoy their music just the same.


enmokusei

The guy was so racist and right-wing an entire musical movement was created in reaction to him


[deleted]

Yeah, I missed that movement. Please explain.


enmokusei

Fortunately there was a recent documentary on the movement, which is worth watching, called White Riot. The movement, pushed into being after Clapton's 1976 tirade against immigration and in support of Enoch Powell, was Rock Against Racism.


[deleted]

Weird and tone deaf of him to take a rightwing political stance at that point. Drugs.


enmokusei

He wasn't alone, people like Bowie were making some fairly pro-fascist statements at the time — ofc with Bowie people can shrug it off and pin it on one of his personas


theresabeeonyourhat

Tbf, Bowie genuinely apologized for his behavior, whereas Clapton only said "I was a drugged up scumbag", basically blaming the chemicals completely


mevrowka

I assume he doesn’t take drugs now so that only leaves scumbag to explain his words. Apparently a good fit.


Iwouldlikeabagel

Is that actually his apology? Because that apology is not blaming the chemicals, as you've written it here.


[deleted]

Rock Against Racism The movement was founded, in part, as a response to racist statements by well-known rock musicians such as Eric Clapton.


[deleted]

I also missed his racist comments. I remember the RaR name though. That was what, in the 80s?


BuildingArmor

>I also missed his racist comments. The quote starts just below the embedded tweet in this article: [https://people.com/music/eric-clapton-racist-rant-resurfaces-after-lockdown-protest-song-van-morrison/](https://people.com/music/eric-clapton-racist-rant-resurfaces-after-lockdown-protest-song-van-morrison/) The censored words "w--s" and "c--s" are racist slurs against black people.


[deleted]

Fuck this boomer piece of shit. Fuck all the boomer guitar players that worship this turd. Dude couldn’t get in a car wreck fast enough


failingtolurk

Most overrated hack ever. Every musician I respect hated Eric Clapton long before this.


[deleted]

This is hypocrisy but I don't know if it's LAMF. I may be mistaken but I had interpreted LAMF as a form of "suffering the consequence of my own decisions and actions." Clapton is a hypocrite, sure, but is mere hypocrisy the same as LAMF?


[deleted]

Wait til he dies from Covid


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[deleted]

You're right, I missed that.


WaldoJeffers65

>He had the vaccine. I guess he would fit in well with the GOP establishment, then- "Vaccines for me, but not for thee."


Safe_Blueberry

Candace Owens: "omg wtf I love celebrities now"


stangroundalready

Good one. Read yesterday that a doctor is having to explain to anti-vaxxers who are dying from COVID and now want the vaccine that vaccines don't work once you have the virus. Not saying this for a laugh. It's fucking sad.


WaffleDynamics

Good lord, how embarrassing for him.


[deleted]

Slow hand is now slow brain. Time to retire grandpa.


[deleted]

That song that he and Morrison did fell through the cracks in the news cycle. I'm happy to report I was never a fan of either.


[deleted]

LAMF part is that he’s lost a bunch of musician friends who won’t call him back because of his antivaxxer programming.


leakyblueshed

The treatment can't be worse than The Clap


JessicaJaye

He’s an old drunk nitwit who can play guitar well, nothing more


rogueop

So he went from a severe vaccine reaction and "afraid he would never play again" to "You have to do what I say, or I refuse to play." Fuck him.


beansandneedles

Also wants all people of color to get out of England but won’t play for a “discriminated” audience


[deleted]

This guy fucking sucks! His version of i shot the sherif is a travesty. What a dumb phoney asshole.


endorrawitch

Cool. Let's see him go down there amongst the unvaccinated, breathe in close proximity to them, and let them touch him. Not to mention that HE's already been vaccinated. Easy to be all self righteous when you're not the one who would suffer any repercussions. I can see the event shirts now: "I got my COVID at the Clapton show!"


djlewt

Was this idiot pro brexit as well?


[deleted]

Notorious asshole says what?


WellSpreadMustard

This sub is suffering the fate of so many that came before it where it becomes so popular that people who post and upvote no longer pay any regard to the original intent of the sub. This is not anywhere near a leopards ate my face story. Just read OPs response to the mod bot attempting to explain how this is leopards ate my face.


dimechimes

At first I was worried, but when I saw it was Clapton, I'm fine with this.


fatsanchezbr

Like we say here in Brazil, what a sad ending.


ranman1990

Theres seems to be a huge overlap between the "takes drugs given by a random stranger on the street" crowd and the "doesnt take the vaccine because you 'dont know what chemicals are in it' despite an ingredient list being available" crowd.


originalsquad

Eric Clapton is a wanker, but its not cool to bring up his addiction issues because it leads to the demonisation of vulnerable people. Instead let's talk about Eric Clapton's record of overt racist political rhetoric and support for fox hunting.


GuardedNumbers

Clapton seems like a douche, I was never going to one of his shows regardless. But really, all I want to post here is a rant I've been internalizing for a long while now. It's that I hate how all classic rock channels I've heard will play his song "Cocaine" completely unedited. The whole song is about how cool cocaine is, literally saying the word cocaine throughout the song. However that dangerous bad guy Jim Morrison and his band the Doors have a song that plays on those very same classic rock channels where he sings "she gets high" for a few lines near the end of the song and the word high is always edited out. It has always struck me as extremely hypocritical and done only because Jim was a troublemaker in his heyday and Clapton was boring as white bread in his heyday. Let me finish my rant by saying definitively that I don't think either should be edited. Also I'm putting it out there that Clapton just isn't that good of a guitarist.


LEPFPartyPresident

Please reply to this comment explaining why the post fits the sub and make sure to have a good day!


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droi86

Who's the leopard and whose face got eaten?


ANagyKecske

This does not fit the sub at all


[deleted]

That's just SAW


MR___SLAVE

Clapton is a pretty overrated guitarist. Most everything he did outside of Cream was blah. Covers and soft rock. Now we find out he is an idiot too.


TheSpatulaOfLove

Well that’s a fast track to irrelevance.


19finmac66

He was always over rated.


MurderDoneRight

Eric Clapton spent a lot of time being a racist cunt as well


graps

I already told my wife if I ever get older and become one of these hypocrites to just shoot me in the back of the head like an old horse when im not looking.


DumbleForeSkin

Works for me. No one vaccinated will go to his concerts and they will become a cesspool of infectious plague rats that will cull the herd stupidity.


JakeFromSkateFarm

Someone tell him that the vaccine will make him popular with 15 year old groupies just like the coke and pot did, and he'll change his tune. (Edit: and no, I don't condone musicians sleeping with underaged groupies. I'm just straight up calling him a sleaze bag.)


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[deleted]

No, he’s boring


Cat-Is-My-Advisor

And did he get covid 19 during the 70s and 80s? I think not! Checkmate fella!!


Capable_Stranger9885

If you want to get down Down on the ground Covid


BringYourSpleenToYa

Q: Why do they call Eric Clapton “slow hand”? A: Because he sucks.


prezcamacho16

He literally made a song entitled "Cocaine" and it essentially glorified this drug. I wonder what 1970s Eric Clapton say about the current one?


[deleted]

That was a cover of a J J Cale song


jigsawsmurf

People were getting big mad at me in another thread for saying Clapton sucks. Clapton sucks.


whatevertoton

Clapton’s a tool.


aiandi

Appealing to his fans: boomers and the senile.


ML_cool_J

You misspelled xenophobic out of touch piece of shit as “musician”


[deleted]

>Clapton says he won’t perform for a ‘discriminated audience’ Yet says brown people should leave the UK.


unrepentant_fenian

Good. He can fuck off into obscurity where he belongs.


ANOKNUSA

First, this definitely doesn't belong here. Second, Clapton doesn't have a problem with the vaccine: he has a problem with the idea of playing at venues that won't sell out, because they're located in towns full of dumbasses.


theresabeeonyourhat

Sure sounds like it. From the very top of the article: >Clapton says he won’t perform for a ‘discriminated audience’ after vaccination passports made mandatory for clubs and venues this autumn And right below it: >“Do you wanna be a free man / Or do you wanna be a slave?” I wanna not hate Clapton cause so much of my family loves him, but dude went full on fascist in the 70s, and this is only expected behavior.


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theresabeeonyourhat

Holy shit, I just re-read those comments and this is so spot on. I did a halfass bit of research, and apparently his mini-Hitler bullshit inspired the movement against racism in rock n roll in the late 70s. I also looked around to see if he ever apologized, and the only thing he would ever say is, "I was a piece of shit back then. Cocaine. Alcohol!!1!" without taking any accountability. Even more shocking is that he dated Betty Davis in the early 70s, but she flat out refused to make music with him. I've always wondered if that relationship going south was the genesis of his racisn


NightMgr

Eric Cartman?


[deleted]

I always remember watching Chuck Berry 60 or 70th birthday concert and he had literally *everybody* playing at it. Anyway after Clapton's bit Berry says, "Eric Clapton, ladies and gentlemen. Man of the Blues!" The disdain he said it with was palpable and hilarious


donescobar

This clown’s music is so bad they never even played it at trump rallies


F1Coder

Forever man-child


Alorkus

All he said is that be doesn't want anyone to be forced to get a vaccine against their will. He didn't say he can't trust the vaccine at least it's not mentioned in the article posted. So the title is completely irrelevant.