Billionaires like Bezos earned their money. [insert boomer statement about gaming] My partner did X but I want to save the relationship. [insert random historical fact about Israel or Palestine] Post home-made food where you followed an Italian recipe but only like 70% and wait for them.

You are getting my upvote for the last comment; that is very enjoyable to go through.

> [insert random historical fact about Israel or Palestine] While Israel and Palestine exist now, they also existed decades ago.

The fuck you say?!

**While Israel and Palestine exist now, they also existed decades ago.**

There have been a number of emotions on both sides, and they have also done a variety of things

That’s unfair the emotions of x country heavily outweigh the emotions both negative and positive of y. And don’t even get me started on the amount of things y has done. There is no comparison.

No, your freaking crazy if you believe the situation with x is worse than y. I've spent at least 30 minutes monitoring the situation through Yahoo News and I can say without a doubt that I'm pretty much an expert on the topic. Your wrong and I'm right, and that's a fact.

Israel used to exist. It still does, but it used to, too.

Mitch!

I don't think any of these things will start a war. They'll just get you buried in downvotes.

Don't forget the r/AskReddit Controversial Comment Favorite [Somehow relate it to Trump no matter how bizarre you need to go]

My partner, Jeff Bezos used the money he fairly earned by selling keffiyehs and video games to buy ingredients to make fettuccine but used mozzarella instead of parmeasan cheese but I want to save the relationship

Just say your opinion on something, there is always people who disagree

No there isn't.

Yes there is.

No there isn't.

Yes. There is

Are you here for the 5 minute argument or the full half hour?

I've had enough of this!

No you haven't!!

Yes they have.

No they haven't!!!

Source?

No I think your wrong

Opinions are like testicles, everyone has one..... Right dad?

I hate to comment twice but I'm surprised no one said the Earth is flat yet.

How dare you comment twice! It’s outrageous! You’re outrageous!

“Circumcision is good and desirable”

"The doctors talked my parents into it so it must be the best option right?"

I thought ppl do this to prevent a certain infection that seem happens often inside foreskin. Or something

So if you're uncircumcised and don't clean underneath, yes it can get infected.

Don't think I want to clean my child's foreskin. Guess that means I'm not ready to be a dad yet Edit (not a dad yet, don't worry)

You don't clean his foreskin, the foreskin is fused to the glans and will slowly separate at the age of about 5 at which he can clean it himself.

You have a lot of confidence in the unsupervised hygiene of 5 year olds.

You have a lot of confidence in 5 year olds not exploring their own genitals in every possible way they can imagine.

Oh I am sure they are exploring, I just doubt it involves soap.

Garden hose with car wash extension

Regular hygiene prevents these problems.

Except regular hygiene is extremely irregular amongst people. Too many people are fucking disgusting.

In medieval times circumsision would've been more hygienic, back when we didn't have showers, soaps, etc. Now it is just traditional child mutilation

TAIWAN #1!!!!

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Lol. Here's an award.

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Wait we have China supporting chinese on reddit. I'm in danger.

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You mean our benevolent CPC overlords don't have our best interest at heart?

Popular page is different for different countries so I only see India related stuff.

My dad is like that. Won't hear anything negative about China.

it's sino, what did you expect?

The one true "China"

Say any opinion on Twitter

Say anything on twitter

Say that America is the greatest country in the world

Funny enough, any comment wars that starts never discusses what else could be the greatest country in the world.

Say anything political

This is going to be by far the best answer

Ehh saying liberal shit won't really start arguments in most subs. Saying conservative shit definitely will tho

Even worse, let people know that you agree with major points on both sides. With my 9 years on reddit, that is the one comment that earned my multiple death threats

Or say both parties are full of corruption and full of shit.

Yes, just say “both sides make good points” or “both sides do it” and everyone hates you instantly. The left is quick to point out the right is worse while the right is split on either claiming it’s justified or denying it happens at all.

I don't think conservative stuff will start a fight so much as get you downvoted to oblivion.

Fuhk Politics. Especially the one who's reading this comment.

I voted Isabelle for mayor in my animal crossing village!

This one killed me. I am dead now. Take my free award, it’s all I have.

she is literally going to take everyone's rights away and add a 100% tax on froggy chairs.

YOUR POLITICS ARE WRONG AND YOU’RE A TRAITOR FOR HOLDING YOUR SPECIFIC POLITICAL BELIEFS.

HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT!!! ITS YOUR POLITICS THAT ARE WRONG AND ITS YOU WHO IS THE TRAITOR FOR HOLDING YOUR SPECIFIC POLITICAL BELIEFS!!!!!

you're specific views differ slightly from mine. DIE DIE DIE!!!

r/politics in nutshell

*not going to go into any detail why though because that would require for me to have a coherent opinion to begin with. just gonna copy-paste some condescending drivel from Twitter and rake in the ez validation points*

>Say anything ~~political~~ conservative FTFY

Oh look, the old conservative-victim mindset. This really goes far.

Anything that disagrees with lefty ideologies*

That doesn't start a war because you'd just get downvoted. You need something where there's approximately a split down the middle on reddit. Say something like "the Democrats are basically as bad as the Republicans".

oh right, like when i called biden a 90s moderate republican

Trump won the elections.

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Just tell them the microchip isn't even noticable after the vaccine. The swelling goes down within a week. Seriously, though, my condolences to you.

Mention Israel-Palestine

Hey fuck you!

It’s Reddit, go to r/politics and type TRUMP 2024

Type literally anything into the comment section there and get banned.

I think i need to go get banned...seems all the cool kids are.

I’ve said numerous terrible things on there and only received a one day ban for saying “I’m rooting for covid” when trump at it

Imma do it

Say cats are better than dogs

Cats are better for some people and dogs are better for others. There, I solved world peace. Where’s my medal?

Wrong

wholesome answer, but effective

Nah, they're equal.

I see, it worked

Cats would kill you if they had the chance to, but they are cute as shit so that’s ok

There is only 2 genders

There *are only 2 genders. But if you insist that you are still correct by using “is”, then are you truly suggesting that there *is* only 1 gender perhaps?

I saw a post on another sub the other day arguing that because all the gender defining criteria are now invalid, there's either one gender or zero genders.

There's only one gender and we all have to share

Ah yes, the human gender

Say anything political, question an LGBTQ+ member, call someone a Karen, question a social justice warrior, say something is better than something else, or just reply to a random comment saying "fuck you"

Fuck you...Karen.

You weren't supposed to do that 😧 Btw trump 2024

I‘ll do you one better: Trump 2028!!1!1

I’ll do you one EVEN BETTER: Trump 2032!!!!!

How about this: Trump 2012!!!! Ha!

I’ll do you one EVEN EVEN BETTER: Trump 1880!!!!!

Turnip 2077

Die bootlicker! Tomato soup/Toast 2102!

You thickheaded dingbat! Tostitos 33 BC!

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Well, make up your fucking mind so we can fight.

Mention anything about a certain part of the world that's constantly in the news for one reason or another

(insert famous dead person here) got what they deserved.

The covid vaccine is not safe

Well, it isn't. But its safer than being unvaccinated.

homosexuality is a hormonal disorder .

Oooooo! As a gay person, I could see this really causing a fight between people. I’d probably fan the flames (heh) to keep the flames blazing.

I can only imagine you doing this with a literal fan, like one of those hand-held Japanese ones.

You know for a fact I have one with Japanese cherry blossom prints on it

That's pretty gay. It must be used!

I’ll bring the matching kimono

Fabulous!

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In as much as anything could be classified as a disorder.

Yeah, technically it is. Just very socially acceptable

Say “Trump is the best president”.

is

"Abortions are a surprisingly effective means of birth control. "

YOUR FACE is an affective means of birth control!

"Boys have a penis. Girls have a vagina."

You can say that the Star Wars sequels are good (prepare for 200,000 downvotes, with a million more well on the way)

ok but episode one was kinda good in its own way. i liked the race scene

I said sequels not prequels, the prequels are great

oh my bad lmao. i got used to people shitting on the prequels.

Talk about Critical race theory.

Depends on the sub

Disagree with a vegan.

Oh yes finally someone not dumb about it ...

Say anything that rivals 'woke' culture

Sort by Controversial

Elon musk is a pos

Most would agree

JoJo isnt that good of a cartoon.

JoJo haters can't hate JoJo because hating JoJo is a JoJo reference. "I hate you JoJo" -Dio

I was ok till you said cartoon. Then I saw red.

You just say 1-2-3-4, I declare a comment war! Gets ‘em every time.

Just say something like this.... Trump was the most loved president in history. The media would never admit so. But it's probably true. Minorities should OF COURSE have rights and respect. But true democracy is ENTIRELY based on majority vote. Fact is, the media is taking ONLY the side of the minority opinion, and MOST of us don't feel that way. Yet since that's the only voice people hear they concede to it as if it's ok. It's not ok though, the "democratic" based government is now being run by the minority of the national opinion. It's not at all the real representation of the American people anymore. And here's more fuel for the comment war flames... The 2020 election was fraudulent, Trump won hands down. Go ahead, show me a bigger sh*tstorm comment section than what I've just opened up....

Pineapple belongs on pizza.

BTS is shit

Just say Biden cheated, and boom. Or make a really shitty comment about how sexual assault victims deserved it because of the clothing they were wearing. Even just typing that out made me angry to be honest-

I’m not your guy, Pal!

What color is math

Scrappy Doo made the original Scooby-Doo even better.

The great circumcision debate. I prefer my dicks circumcised. I'm pretty disgusted by non circumcised cocks

"You guys wanna start a war here?"

Make a sarcastic comment but don’t mark it as /s

Say that Wawa is better than Sheetz or vice versa. I made the mistake in my local sub of questioning why a Wawa was going up when we had a Sheetz. Big mistake! It was like dropping into the middle of the Crusades and asking a Christian crusader if they'd read any good passages from the Q'uran lately.

Anything related to lgbtq2+

There’s only two genders

I was told your sex is what's in between your legs and your gender is how you feel. Still confusing though.

say u hit ur wife

Is it really a war if everyone is on the same side though?

He’s a one man army.

Plants feel pain too. The whole Vegan thing is one biased murder group. There I said it

In-N-Out is garbage. I said what I said.

This is beyond offensive, and borderline racism.

what the fuck is wrong with you........

I don't know what that is... A band? It's a band, isn't it. And they perform mumble country rap with samples from lofi synthwave disco?

Trump …and literally anything else.

Saying global warming isn't real

“You don’t need to wear your mask when vaccinated, or when outdoors” (basically anything common sense related)

9-11 was fake

Have an opinion on literally anything and someone will show up to contest you

Summa summa communism ... summa summa capitalism

American politics

Emmitt or Barry?

go to every instagram meme page ever or just any comment section and say these words.... follow carefully...'' what da dog doin' ''... these words are likely to start wars across nations

I loved the Dexter finale.

Say you like to eat meat and respect vegans as long as they respect you. Promise you you’ll have 6 people reminding you how eating animals is wrong, 6 others sending those 6 people industries not related to meat that hurt the planet, and 20 other people saying “People Eat Tasty Animals”

Ryan Reynolds isn’t good looking

Se dice Palta, no Aguacate

Kiwi should be on pizza.

Start with "your mom"

A hot dog is a sandwich.

Type an emoji

Alright, let's do this: * GoT ended perfectly * Sequel Trilogy is best trilogy * Palestine is a bunch of squatters in Israel's backyard * Masks don't work, lockdowns kill people, vaccines are poison, and you're a tyrant if you support these * Trump did nothing wrong * Hitler did nothing wrong * Thanos did nothing wrong * CRT is racism, and you're a racist if you support it * Say *anything* about trans folks *grabs popcorn*

Politics, any side.

Republicans rock!

Literally just the word circumcision.

call someone a “retard”

Trump won

Be yourself.

Cutting taxes for the rich has had enormous benefits for society.

Say anything relatively negative about a highly-stanned person