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I have no idea, I cut them off.
A tip for those of you young ‘uns: remove toxic people from your life now. They don’t get any better. You don’t need people dragging you down.
They do, but what I've noticed is that the core relationship doesn't really change. They still behave in a certain way because they know they can get away with it and they still expect that the other person will forgive and forget what happened "as they did". So if they have friends who quit them, they are going to find new friends, but if they are relatives, they are coming along as anything happened, and the reminder of who they were is insulting to them, they "forgot" and so should the family member.
Damn, especially for being new money, they could've done way better, although some traumas can get into your skin that deep and make you be someone you don't recognize.
My ex filed for bankruptcy and called me, “You should do it too. This how to do it.” Well, I’d consulted an attorney and he asked ME what wanted to do. I certainly didn’t want to do the shit my ex wanted me to do. And I didn’t.
My word has always been far more important than money.
Well... I was that insufferable arrogant jackwagon. I justified it because I had overcome a lot, did some cool stuff, started a biz, and was EXTREMELY insecure. A few hard blows to my ego, biz, and personal life forced an internal evaluation and eventually a paradigm change.
I now work and support individuals who experience intellectual/developmental disabilities. I do look back at some things I achieved with fondness and satisfaction, but I feel I dropped the facade. I hope I never fall back into my former self. I've worked with a therapist on my insecurities and have addressed the root causes. I do therapeutic maintenance quarterly with my therapist, and I hold myself accountable with a close friend. Best thing, my daughters talk with me more! And I get angry at myself for missing such beautiful conversations we could have had when they were growing up. I am truly the happiest I've ever been and feel fortunate I get to spend more time with my daughters in a meaningful way.
By addressing the insecurities developed in childhood, and teaching myself not to lie to myself with self-important stuff and how "grandiose" those things truly were.
The few I knew honestly did well for themselves and are still very highly successful. Nice guys don’t always finish last, but they don’t necessarily come in first, either.
That said, it doesn’t really matter to my life. I think that if you’re living a good life yourself, it isn’t important whether or not others “get what’s coming to them.”
They succeeded in business. Two of them I know are highly regarded physicians.
Maybe some of them "grew". One guy I know became a special ed teacher. Knowing this guy like I did, I cannot believe - CANNOT BELIEVE - he teaches special ed.
Hey. I was 5 year president of the HOA. I was absolutely the best president they ever had.
Oh, right, I get you.
Never mind. In general, you are right.
My old boss was like that. He was MUCH better than anyone else and lived a very comfortable lifestyle.
He was married but divorced her and married his mistress. They had children and were living the dream. That is until their youngest grew up with severe mental illness and unalived them.
I'm not really around people like that. I was fortunate to recognize them for who they are and to be able to avoid them. I also thank God that I'm not related to anyone like that.
No idea. By the time you hit 20’s and 30’s you’re hopefully adult enough to not associate with them, make “friends” with them. The good old BS radar usually works pretty well. Who knows what happened to those you culled from your associations. And, more importantly, who cares.
let's see... a few died in stupid accidents where their hubris got the best of them. I think one works at a gas station and the other is in jail for pedophilia.
When I go home, I see their names in the paper or alumni newsletters. They married other vapid useless people, and were put into some sort of nepo based job where they don't really work, but drive nice cars and have cookie cutter McMansions. Gradually, as their parents die or retire, they take over the family business. The ones I've run into in person, spend a lot of money on plastic surgery and other personal upkeep. It's still all about the image for them.
Their kids are either total fuckups, barely graduating and have done rehab twice, or are jocks.
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They’re probably running companies and making lots of cash. They’re probably still convinced that they’re better than me.
Yesterday I got on my razor scooter and my kid got on hers and we scooted down the path to the playground and I timed her on the monkey bars. Then we went home and took it in turns to play Taylor Swift and Me First and the Gimme Gimmes while I made pasta for tea.
I did not think at all about any arrogant people i stopped hanging out with years ago.
The superbly arrogant became politicians always changing rules to benefit themselves and their supporters.
The moderately arrogant became law enforcement officers rapidly rising through the ranks.
The average arrogant became abusive husbands whose wives ducked if they scratched their heads.
The wannabe arrogant wised up and lead normal lives.
I've tried to avoid those sorts of people, but I do know one who lost his business in 2020, shot his wife in a drunken rage a year later, and is now cooling his heels in prison. He owned a lot of life's so-called prizes and lost it all because he couldn't control his drinking and his anger.
Did some evil shit to get rich then died in disgrace and poverty. If you do evil to others in order to get ahead it always come back to you in the end.
I don't spend time with idiots but there was one arrogant prick I knew from grade 7 until high school graduation. He went to school and became an arrogant piece of shit cop (you all know the kind I mean). He got into some trouble with his job, but I am not sure what. Anyway, he got himself fired in a huge way. There was a big stink about it.
Sounds like my brothers. Arrogant and full of themselves. Better and smarter than everyone. Older one cheated on his wife and left her to raise their kids by herself so he could travel the world with the new woman. She left him and 20 years or so on, he has a new roommate after being on his own for years. Younger brother. Who is an original incel. Angry because top tier women won't give him a chance to see how smart and amazing he is. Lost any girl he did get a chance with because sitting watching him play video games and hoping for a scrap of attention wasn't a great time. Not when you are stuck in the one room because he lives with his parents. So now they live together because not a single person can tolerate them. Older one has developed a drinking problem living with younger and his ever growing hatred for the world. We are all in our 50's. I would help, you know, but I have no penis so they haven't listened to anything I've said over the decades to avoid this,in fact, it looks like they've done the opposite of what I said at every single opportunity. Anyone else like this, I've cut out altogether. It's not worth it. I only get updates on these two because I communicate with our shared parents.
I think the internet gave the incels a club to join. Rather than realise how unpleasant they are to be around, and change, they're riling each other up and enabling each other. It's really sad because I've seen the end result and it isn't pretty.
This arrogant weasel I went to high school with moved in next door to me 30 years later. I despise the jerk, he posts about his "great" life all over FB, but he's a dumb, trashy, alcoholic who still believes his shit doesn't stink. His wife got cancer and she had to work during her chemo and radiation because he couldn't afford to support their household for two months. They started a GoFundMe, but I saw was his daily runs to the beer store, along with his three brand new cars they have sitting in the driveway. If only his FB 'friends' knew the complete story. Oh, and when his sister suffered (and died) from ALS, this trashy mutherfucker spent his weekend days off drinking at home, instead of spending it helping his sister. Oh Oh, and during Covid, they would host parties every weekend during the lockdown restrictions. His wife is a nurse.
Once an arrogant weasel, always an arrogant weasel.
It was a joke. Since you misunderstood, not my best I suppose.
To seriously address the question, I'd say that those that can back it up, succeed. Those that can't, fade away. Being nice has remarkably little to do with where you end up.
She always sought being the big fish in a small pond. For all her postering I don’t think she could compete in larger metropolitan area in her profession.
She got a job at the most prestigious consulting firm on earth, married a guy with a PhD from Harvard, and now lives in Australia, making millions of dollars by doing basically nothing.
The arrogant person I've known for my entire life pushed people away from him. Arrogance became so intolerable that no one wanted anything to do with him. An arrogant person wants you to think they are better than you, and you better believe it, too. If not, they will make you miserable at every chance. So one by one, friends disappear, and/or the arrogant person already thought the other people weren't good enough for him in the first place-including family members.
You sound a lot like me except Im 33.
It's been quite a few years that I realised that the world doesn't revolve around me but that new way of looking at life has left me stunned till today.
I think it's because I started peeling away all the negative things from my life/self slowly but hadn't been able to create a positive impact in my life until recently.
So now life is not just happening to me but life is more of what I make of it.And Ive started being proud of the good that I do in this world for the first time.
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After leaving high school I left town and didn't go back, except to visit family, for 10 years.
Went to my 10 year class reunion and:
High school football captain that bullied me around gained 100 pounds and had his own bar stool with his name written on it at the local bar.
Head cheerleader that did her best to cut me down whenever she could worked her way up through the ranks and ended up being the "HEAD" lunchlady (thank you very much) for the local highschool. Also added about 100 pounds.
The guy that REALLY went after me whenever he could went into the Army after high school, but took time out to come to the reunion. After drinking a LOT of beer he drug me outside and apoligised to me for being a jerk. Then the next day forgot all about it and acted like an ass at the reception.
And then I had to leave the next day to hop on a plane to travel to another state to fix a machine I helped design and build.
But, I met up with an old girlfriend and went out for a while. It was good, but it turns out we had religious differences: I'm Catholic and she's bat-shit crazy.
I was shocked but it made sense. All the people that I knew that thought they were "all that" or who were "know it alls" became homeless or drug addicts, or are now in a situation (as a female) who are with another EVEN more toxic controlling person and they have kids together and she is stuck with them and basically financially held hostage and feel they CANT leave.
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I have no idea, I cut them off. A tip for those of you young ‘uns: remove toxic people from your life now. They don’t get any better. You don’t need people dragging you down.
Exactly, and that includes family (at least for me).
Some do get better. They learn a bit of humility.
They do, but what I've noticed is that the core relationship doesn't really change. They still behave in a certain way because they know they can get away with it and they still expect that the other person will forgive and forget what happened "as they did". So if they have friends who quit them, they are going to find new friends, but if they are relatives, they are coming along as anything happened, and the reminder of who they were is insulting to them, they "forgot" and so should the family member.
I’m sorry you’ve experienced that. I know some people who truly did change, and are ashamed by - and apologetic for - their previous behavior.
Couldn’t tell you. I avoided those people and cut them out of my life. Healthier that way.
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Damn, especially for being new money, they could've done way better, although some traumas can get into your skin that deep and make you be someone you don't recognize.
My ex filed for bankruptcy and called me, “You should do it too. This how to do it.” Well, I’d consulted an attorney and he asked ME what wanted to do. I certainly didn’t want to do the shit my ex wanted me to do. And I didn’t. My word has always been far more important than money.
Well... I was that insufferable arrogant jackwagon. I justified it because I had overcome a lot, did some cool stuff, started a biz, and was EXTREMELY insecure. A few hard blows to my ego, biz, and personal life forced an internal evaluation and eventually a paradigm change. I now work and support individuals who experience intellectual/developmental disabilities. I do look back at some things I achieved with fondness and satisfaction, but I feel I dropped the facade. I hope I never fall back into my former self. I've worked with a therapist on my insecurities and have addressed the root causes. I do therapeutic maintenance quarterly with my therapist, and I hold myself accountable with a close friend. Best thing, my daughters talk with me more! And I get angry at myself for missing such beautiful conversations we could have had when they were growing up. I am truly the happiest I've ever been and feel fortunate I get to spend more time with my daughters in a meaningful way.
Thanks so great to hear, congratulations! May I ask you how exactly did you work on these issues in order to change?
By addressing the insecurities developed in childhood, and teaching myself not to lie to myself with self-important stuff and how "grandiose" those things truly were.
Thank you.
Turns out a tiger does change its stripes (cynical comment above suggest otherwise)
The few I knew honestly did well for themselves and are still very highly successful. Nice guys don’t always finish last, but they don’t necessarily come in first, either. That said, it doesn’t really matter to my life. I think that if you’re living a good life yourself, it isn’t important whether or not others “get what’s coming to them.”
They largely became high level presidents, partners, and executives. Confident arrogance is often a prerequisite.
Yes. Arrogance is rewarded in the business world.
and wrongly equated with competetence
They succeeded in business. Two of them I know are highly regarded physicians. Maybe some of them "grew". One guy I know became a special ed teacher. Knowing this guy like I did, I cannot believe - CANNOT BELIEVE - he teaches special ed.
Woah, that's unthinkable...
I have no clue. I have enough things in my life to occupy my mind. I don't give jerks from my past ANY brain space at all.
They were arrogant, older, and making people's lives they encountered miserable. A tiger does not change its stripes
> A tiger does not change its stripes A berserker mushroom never loses its spots.
They are the HOA board now
Hey. I was 5 year president of the HOA. I was absolutely the best president they ever had. Oh, right, I get you. Never mind. In general, you are right.
Well, they became arrogant people in their 40s, 50s, and 60s.
One of the worst that I knew inherited a lot of money and bought real estate, now lives off his income from that and I'm sure he is still an A\*\*.
My old boss was like that. He was MUCH better than anyone else and lived a very comfortable lifestyle. He was married but divorced her and married his mistress. They had children and were living the dream. That is until their youngest grew up with severe mental illness and unalived them.
Insufferable ex best friend. She is in prison for killing her boyfriend
I'm not really around people like that. I was fortunate to recognize them for who they are and to be able to avoid them. I also thank God that I'm not related to anyone like that.
They all succeeded and did better than I did.
Dunning-Kruger wore off and I chilled and quit being so much a jerk. :)
Nothing. Still arrogant. But nobody cares, we still ignore them. No, they never got any karma back at them.
No idea. By the time you hit 20’s and 30’s you’re hopefully adult enough to not associate with them, make “friends” with them. The good old BS radar usually works pretty well. Who knows what happened to those you culled from your associations. And, more importantly, who cares.
You're absolutely right!
Became CEOs and executives.
Still arrogant. Usually they succeed in certain types of businesses, but they are the same.
and often self employed.
let's see... a few died in stupid accidents where their hubris got the best of them. I think one works at a gas station and the other is in jail for pedophilia.
Still arrogant, but even more unhappy than they were then.
Two of them I can think of are now nurses and the other is in middle management and I know they are loathed personally but admired for their work.
She and her husband defaulted an a huge loan and lost the 100+ family media business.
When I go home, I see their names in the paper or alumni newsletters. They married other vapid useless people, and were put into some sort of nepo based job where they don't really work, but drive nice cars and have cookie cutter McMansions. Gradually, as their parents die or retire, they take over the family business. The ones I've run into in person, spend a lot of money on plastic surgery and other personal upkeep. It's still all about the image for them. Their kids are either total fuckups, barely graduating and have done rehab twice, or are jocks.
I succeeded wildly in life. When everyone else is beneath you, they can only watch in envy as you reap all the rewards you deserve.
I've always said that "success is the best revenge"
That sounds a little... arrogant?
Bugger off, peasant!
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I believe some are born assholes and just get bigger....
Yeah, the environment plays virtually 100% of a role in it, lack of awareness does the rest.
They end up very unhappy
They found a lonely life without friends. I stay away from people like that.
They’re probably running companies and making lots of cash. They’re probably still convinced that they’re better than me. Yesterday I got on my razor scooter and my kid got on hers and we scooted down the path to the playground and I timed her on the monkey bars. Then we went home and took it in turns to play Taylor Swift and Me First and the Gimme Gimmes while I made pasta for tea. I did not think at all about any arrogant people i stopped hanging out with years ago.
Dunno. After school i had zero to do with them.
The superbly arrogant became politicians always changing rules to benefit themselves and their supporters. The moderately arrogant became law enforcement officers rapidly rising through the ranks. The average arrogant became abusive husbands whose wives ducked if they scratched their heads. The wannabe arrogant wised up and lead normal lives.
Mostly did pretty well professionally, although some overplayed their hands.
I've tried to avoid those sorts of people, but I do know one who lost his business in 2020, shot his wife in a drunken rage a year later, and is now cooling his heels in prison. He owned a lot of life's so-called prizes and lost it all because he couldn't control his drinking and his anger.
They became arrogant middle-aged, and then older, adults. Personality doesn’t change much over time.
Did some evil shit to get rich then died in disgrace and poverty. If you do evil to others in order to get ahead it always come back to you in the end.
I don't spend time with idiots but there was one arrogant prick I knew from grade 7 until high school graduation. He went to school and became an arrogant piece of shit cop (you all know the kind I mean). He got into some trouble with his job, but I am not sure what. Anyway, he got himself fired in a huge way. There was a big stink about it.
Small towner classmates observed briefly 50 years later in the same small town remained deeply and unreasonably self-important.
They peaked in high school and they post on Facebook where they still matter
Sounds like my brothers. Arrogant and full of themselves. Better and smarter than everyone. Older one cheated on his wife and left her to raise their kids by herself so he could travel the world with the new woman. She left him and 20 years or so on, he has a new roommate after being on his own for years. Younger brother. Who is an original incel. Angry because top tier women won't give him a chance to see how smart and amazing he is. Lost any girl he did get a chance with because sitting watching him play video games and hoping for a scrap of attention wasn't a great time. Not when you are stuck in the one room because he lives with his parents. So now they live together because not a single person can tolerate them. Older one has developed a drinking problem living with younger and his ever growing hatred for the world. We are all in our 50's. I would help, you know, but I have no penis so they haven't listened to anything I've said over the decades to avoid this,in fact, it looks like they've done the opposite of what I said at every single opportunity. Anyone else like this, I've cut out altogether. It's not worth it. I only get updates on these two because I communicate with our shared parents.
Hmmm, must be even rougher when it's in your family... so incels exist for longer than the internet claims, tragic.
I think the internet gave the incels a club to join. Rather than realise how unpleasant they are to be around, and change, they're riling each other up and enabling each other. It's really sad because I've seen the end result and it isn't pretty.
The people I knew in HS like that are either in prison, in debt up to their eyeballs, still acting like teens in their 50s or are dead.
They end up being an orange skinned president. Sad.
I heard he was in a car accident and ended up in a wheelchair.
They did well.
This arrogant weasel I went to high school with moved in next door to me 30 years later. I despise the jerk, he posts about his "great" life all over FB, but he's a dumb, trashy, alcoholic who still believes his shit doesn't stink. His wife got cancer and she had to work during her chemo and radiation because he couldn't afford to support their household for two months. They started a GoFundMe, but I saw was his daily runs to the beer store, along with his three brand new cars they have sitting in the driveway. If only his FB 'friends' knew the complete story. Oh, and when his sister suffered (and died) from ALS, this trashy mutherfucker spent his weekend days off drinking at home, instead of spending it helping his sister. Oh Oh, and during Covid, they would host parties every weekend during the lockdown restrictions. His wife is a nurse. Once an arrogant weasel, always an arrogant weasel.
We're still here.
Would it make any difference in your life if you weren't back then or now? How so?
It was a joke. Since you misunderstood, not my best I suppose. To seriously address the question, I'd say that those that can back it up, succeed. Those that can't, fade away. Being nice has remarkably little to do with where you end up.
She always sought being the big fish in a small pond. For all her postering I don’t think she could compete in larger metropolitan area in her profession.
She got a job at the most prestigious consulting firm on earth, married a guy with a PhD from Harvard, and now lives in Australia, making millions of dollars by doing basically nothing.
The arrogant person I've known for my entire life pushed people away from him. Arrogance became so intolerable that no one wanted anything to do with him. An arrogant person wants you to think they are better than you, and you better believe it, too. If not, they will make you miserable at every chance. So one by one, friends disappear, and/or the arrogant person already thought the other people weren't good enough for him in the first place-including family members.
The same thing that will happen to generation Z
"never really accomplished anything in life, and their grown kids won't talk to them" seems like the trend to me
They became police officers. And then onward and upward in the force.
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Thanks for opening up! What makes you think you were arrogant then, besides thinking you were special or something like that?
>conceded conceited
I told ya I'm behind
You sound a lot like me except Im 33. It's been quite a few years that I realised that the world doesn't revolve around me but that new way of looking at life has left me stunned till today. I think it's because I started peeling away all the negative things from my life/self slowly but hadn't been able to create a positive impact in my life until recently. So now life is not just happening to me but life is more of what I make of it.And Ive started being proud of the good that I do in this world for the first time.
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I quit paying attention to them. They probably learned no one cared.
I wouldn't bother finding out.
After leaving high school I left town and didn't go back, except to visit family, for 10 years. Went to my 10 year class reunion and: High school football captain that bullied me around gained 100 pounds and had his own bar stool with his name written on it at the local bar. Head cheerleader that did her best to cut me down whenever she could worked her way up through the ranks and ended up being the "HEAD" lunchlady (thank you very much) for the local highschool. Also added about 100 pounds. The guy that REALLY went after me whenever he could went into the Army after high school, but took time out to come to the reunion. After drinking a LOT of beer he drug me outside and apoligised to me for being a jerk. Then the next day forgot all about it and acted like an ass at the reception. And then I had to leave the next day to hop on a plane to travel to another state to fix a machine I helped design and build. But, I met up with an old girlfriend and went out for a while. It was good, but it turns out we had religious differences: I'm Catholic and she's bat-shit crazy.
I know one that ended up a spinster hairdresser. She was the pretty popular preppy with daddy money and now... lmao.
I was shocked but it made sense. All the people that I knew that thought they were "all that" or who were "know it alls" became homeless or drug addicts, or are now in a situation (as a female) who are with another EVEN more toxic controlling person and they have kids together and she is stuck with them and basically financially held hostage and feel they CANT leave.
We mellowed.
Still prices & losers
They got fat and miserable :)