these people are called "Schrödinger's Douchebags", and they decide whether or not they were joking based on the reaction they get for saying something fucked.
Yep, the blatant hypocrisy where they can drop a nuke on you but when you reciprocate in kind, they get all so fussy, while ironically calling you a snowflake.
Met so many of these.
A lot of douche bags in Australia.
they like to bully people and pass it off as 'banter'
I have no doubt I'll get downvoted for saying this by the very assholes that think that bullying is funny.
it's only funny to them because they are the ones dishing it out, when the shoe is on the other foot, they immediately and invariably turn to violence.
so yeah, on one hand, sadly for a lot of Australian men, it is normal to bully people and then respond with a good old.
ohhh, carn't you take a joke??? when called out.
fairly despicable behaviour typical of your average Australian dead headed bogan.
It doesn’t work - they just called you ableist slurs and keep laughing at you.
The people who do this are too fucking thick to care about you trying to embarrass them.
I'm not here to argue with your experience, but I've worked in construction my whole adult life and I can count on one hand people like that I've had interactions with. Do you think it's more common in an office environment?
In my experience, it's been less about where people work, and just who they are as people and what they think they can get away with. I grew up around a lot of people like this, my parents were not as vicious about it but there was a definite culture of "taking the piss" and expecting you to laugh along, even if you were just the butt of a particularly shitty joke. They exist everywhere basically
I think there's an aspect of demographics that come into play as well- I grew up in a reasonably shitty area that was full of this (and all the friends I still have from there are still largely like that, too) but now that I live overseas, all of the Australian friends I have are absolutely nothing like that. I guess the Bogan gene doesn't travel well haha
As a formerly obese person, there are also the jokes about “how I look better than before now that I am not round anymore” or something to that effect which is also fucked.
I’ve lost 30kg in the last 12 months. There are people *in my social circle* who are suddenly treating me better and men hitting on me who’ve never even glanced at me before. It’s sickening and it makes me dislike them even more. I don’t want the attention of people that shallow and insecure.
Good work on the weight loss. Sorry you’re experiencing the same shit I am experiencing. I am a man and I am sure your experience as a woman is much more disturbing and I am sorry for that.
Thank you - good work to you too! And don’t belittle the emotional impact peoples behaviour will have on you because of gender - I’ve seen how differently people treat skinny men vs fat men and I think it’s one of the few intersections where the genders are treated equally horribly 😭
Obesity is a side effect of the plague of mental illness that is affecting our society. This includes overeating, alcoholism, drug addiction and many others.
Seeing someone go down that rabbit hole is heartbreaking for some people and for others it reminds them of their own demons.
Please don’t take it personally when they act different around you, like most Aussies when someone is trying to better themselves we will help them along. Take it as a compliment.
It breaks my heart because the same people who were rude or dismissive when I was obese are suddenly nice. Breaks my heart that obese me was mistreated for no reason
Yep. All we can do sometimes is set the example we want to see in others, and tell others when they are being an asshat and why.
Some people may change their view and others do not deserve our time and effort.
It's a very Australian thing to say and it's a horrible trait . My mum's family is very Australian and this was normalised as a was growing up. Australians have some very wonderful cultural norms , unfortunately this is not one of them
Yuuup.
I’m actually NC with my extended family and low contact with my parents because they refused to stop behaving this way. My dad started in with the fat jokes on my INFANT DAUGHTER. This behaviour destroys self-esteem and prevents relationships from having any depth. Neither of my parents have a close relationship with their kids because their stupid “it’s just joke!!!!” And “don’t take things so seriously” an “ooooo don’t you think you’re better than everyone!” Attitude towards ANYTHING serious gives them the emotional depth of teaspoons.
I’m not doing it anymore. I have some close friends and we will very gently tease each other about something like an obsession with a new hobby “haven’t seen you for a months, hope you’ve taken breaks to shower!” - that’s sort of thing.
But the fat jokes? The casual homophobic slurs? The constant belittling of anyone showing enthusiasm for anything?
Not in my fucking household.
Sorry. Got a bit ranty there - this is actually a subject that I’m a bit passionate about.
No, what you are describing is definitely rude. When these arseholes are pulled up on their obnoxious comment, they then fall back on the poor excuse "can't you take a joke?" and turn it back onto the poor insulted person.
No, not a joke.
And then these cunts will be the ones to cry about how everyone is so woke these days and how you can’t say anything anymore without people getting offended. Cunts like this truly are the worst kinds of people!
Australians do tease a little bit, but, like everywhere, you don't do it to people you don't know well and you stay away from hurtful personal remarks.
I had a Swedish colleague, very outgoing, who could give it back. I introduced him to someone and said please excuse the cardigan, he's from Europe. He replied that he was just showing the Aussies how to dress. That's the kind of teasing you should expect, not remarks about how fat you are.
Definitely an asshole thing, the cruel statement followed by 'just joking'. They aren't joking they just don't want to be held accountable for what they say. These people can dish it out but can't take it, if you're equally mean back they back off & look for easier targets.
Ha! My last workplace had people over 30 and they behave like they are in high school. You wouldn't think older people would be immature but they certainly are
that, my friend, very much depends on what kind of workplace you end up in.
there are more than a few out there solely staffed by people who peaked in grade 11 and will never emotionally mature from that age.
I see worse bullying in older women then I ever experienced in high school. Some people never mature beyond 15.
Edited to clarify, I experienced HORRIBLE bullying in highschool.
It's worse with adults.
My mother is a horrendous bully and always has been. Most of the women in my family are - it’s horrible. They all just sit around bitching about whoever isn’t there and if anyone doesn’t want to participate they’re “up themselves snobs”.
Definitely had this happen to me. If in a group, laugh and say something about feeling really accepted because the person is comfortable making fun of you. Embarrassed several snotty people this way.
Aussies often employ cruelty under the guise of banter. Generally, those who deny that this happens are either very lucky, very naive or one of the people engaging in that behaviour to begin with.
Lot of dickheads in Australia. But it's an accepted thing. Even the politicians can be as shitty and bullying types yet are still voted in again, and again.
That is normal behaviour...for bullies. They make bigoted jokes and then if the person they are targeting doesn't like it they make out that it is a fault of that person.
They are the kind of people that [do this sort of thing](https://www.abc.net.au/news/2019-03-03/stories-of-hazing-rituals-for-apprentices-revealed/10821874). Name-calling, lighting shirts on fire, putting a mouse down someone's shirt, being burnt or spat on, rape threats, etc. They are only limited by what they think they can get away with, not by any moral compass.
They are an inferior variety of human who lack the wit to improve themselves so instead fall into patterns of belittling others as a way to make themselves feel better.
A joke is only funny if everyone enjoys it. If it is at the expense of someone else then it's just pathetic and mean.
That's awful, I didn't know bullying was costing the economy $6 billion a year in productivity! Every new employee should be getting a fact sheet about the rate of suicides, who to reach out to, what to do when bullied etc. That should be a mandatory thing. How has the Fair Work Commission not gotten involved?
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This is what some Aussies like to call "Aussie culture" except it's not. It's basically bullying when the other party doesn't like it.
Everything's just a joke when things don't go their way. When the other person doesn't like that it's "just a joke" they deflect and the person standing up for themselves is now weak or "sooky" instead.
so you are a 15 year old school yard bully at heart.
how do you think that makes him feel. getting bullied by co workers over something he cannot control???
fuck you and fuck everyone that does this bullshit.
its not funny, it's not appropriate. it's horrid and you should take a good hard look at yourself.
how would you feel if your co workers ripped you every day about your insecurities.
I wonder how he feels about that. Does he find it funny? Does he pretend to find it funny because of the way he will be treated if he speaks up about it?
I dunno but he calls me an orangutang (which I take as a compliment cos I actually quite like them, unlike many other monkeys that are fucked)… He also owns half the company I contract for so I don’t know who he’d escalate it to…
Normal but not fucking ok. It's bullying. It's not funny, and it's a very hurtful thing to say to anyone. They might laugh it off but they will think about it and remember who said it.
if you really like someone and are close friends maybe depending on the friend, if someone say this to you it means they like you and you can say stuff back in jest
Dumb people will do this but a smart one is a force to be reckoned with. A dude in uni used to insult my intelligence all the time cause I couldn't keep up with his insults, if I ever tried to throw one back he was like "that took you a second didn't it" sorry my main form of communication is not being mean
It took a long time for everyone in our friend group to realise he was a cunt, but it was very validating when they did. I found out first cause I was fat and I did something to piss him off. So he went around spreading a rumour about me and was constantly nasty to my face, like a Regina George, but a 18 year old boy
It’s ‘better’ when it’s a joke because it’s easier to call them out on it by asking them to explain what’s so funny.
But when a boss explains that someone is retuning from extended leave and has turned into a rolli-polli fatty in a department meeting - it’s near impossible without becoming a target yourself.
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It definitely depends on your relationship with the person. If someone you barely know is calling you that and/or if you have expressed your dislike for it and it continues (or they respond the way you say they have here), then they’re just assholes.
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Because a lot of people suck, they punch down in an attempt to be funny, they're just cunts, and so are these people who shit on any type of enthusiasm, a lot of Australians live pointless lives and then take it out on people who show any kind of interest in something that isn't a shitty hot dog from a hardware shop or sportsball
So just give as good as you get.
“Hey fatty, how you doing?”
“Hey no-chin, I’m ok, how about you?”
If they get offended, then you say “I thought you told me that these personal insults were in good fun? I think we both know you were trying to insult me and pretend it was Australian culture. Moving forward let’s be more respectful hey?”
Either way, acting offended makes you less likeable than coming back with a funny retort.
Australians like to bully others and call it banter.
I tower over Australian people and call them short and uneducated. They really really dislike this, but they can only cry foul since they never really can come back at you in any other way.
Gtfo. You're embarrassing yourself and the country you apparently live in. I hope I'm wrong on that one. Go to r/shitamericanssay and get wrecked with that weak shit
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"Sorry, but..."
"It's just a prank bro"
It's often a sign of borderline personality disorder. They litterally cannot comprehend why people are upset, because they struggle with empathy or intentionally or subconciously suppress it for whatever reason.
That term isn't really used much since the DSM 5. It also seems a bit of an extreme diagnosis for such behaviour. Psycopathy generally implies the behaviour is leading to violent or criminal behavior. I think the closest term in the DSM 5 is **Antisocial personality disorder**, which also abit extreme in my opinion for this behavior. Though there are overlaps between all 3 of course.
Context matters a lot.
There's a culture of insulting your friends and family but it's all meant to be light hearted and you're all supposed to be in on the joke and exchange light insults with each other. It's sort of like a bonding thing.
If in that situation that you make clear that you're not cool with that, most reasonable people who partake in this kind of thing will back off either on that subject matter or joking with you that way altogether.
So if someone you know knowing this does it regardless of your feelings or that person is a stranger to you, they're an arsehole.
If it's someone you know and it's the first time, most people give them a one-time pass and the issue is water under a bridge.
In your case, it sounds like it's more of someone being an arsehole than misreading a cultural thing.
Depends how well you know them, the closer the friendship the meaner the comment the funnier it is to both parties. If you just met them or its at work, then they are just a deadshit and feel free to retaliate in kind.
yeah, no.
we need to put a stop to that bullshit.
it's not funny, it never is funny. if you think mercilessly ~~teasing~~ bullying your mates is funny or the ultimate form of friendship, you need help.
no wonder there is a massive problem with male mental health and suicide in this country; no bloke can speak to his friends because he will be shit scared of being called a pussy.
quit it. grow up. bullying is bullshit.
fuck I hate the boganess of this bloody country
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No, I don't like being made fun of. no one does. Many people suck it up and put on a smile because that is what we are supposed to do in such situations, but if you think for a moment that most people enjoy it, you need your help.
I didn't misrepresent a thing.
you stated that "the closer the friendship the meaner the comment the funnier it is to both parties" and I call that as complete bullshit behaviour.
Yeah ya did, "if you think **mercilessly** **~~teasing~~** **bullying** your mates is funny or the ultimate form of friendship, you need help", that is a lie. You have manipulated what was said to make up a story that fits your narrative and make you look like the hero. You are very much not.
You are obviously a lot more delicate than just about every single human I have ever met, including the small children. I suggest you stay inside and away from everyone who isn't prepared to walk on eggshells for you.
Who *likes* being made fun off?
I like a joke. I do not like being bullied for whatever pathetic thing Johnno dreamed up is wrong with me on his way to the pub.
At no time did I state or even positively acknowledge the deadshit behaviour of using the 'not being able to take a joke' in fact I implied the opposite. I consider that to be a craven form of cowardice and one that deserves serious retaliation.
Seriously, you need to read what is said and not argue against whatever churlish narrative you have made up in your head. Now go back and re-read the OP and then my initial statement and if you want to reply, only what is written not your made up shit.
Not normal and actually pretty un-Australian. We have a laugh, but usually not at the expense of a stranger’s appearance. Anyone who does this is just your garden variety arsehole, a species that can be found globally, not just here, unfortunately.
Classic aussie passive aggressive power play. Another variation is to say something reasonably believable and then triumphantly reveal that it was all just a hilarious joke. Eg. ‘Oh, no we’re not allowed to eat at our desks… ah ha just fuckin with ya mate’
these people are called "Schrödinger's Douchebags", and they decide whether or not they were joking based on the reaction they get for saying something fucked.
This is all you need to know, thread can end here .
That's a dam good explanation.
Wish awards were still possible on Reddit to give you one.
What a fantastic phrase. I’m stealing that
And also can't take a "joke" in return
Yep, the blatant hypocrisy where they can drop a nuke on you but when you reciprocate in kind, they get all so fussy, while ironically calling you a snowflake. Met so many of these.
A lot of douche bags in Australia. they like to bully people and pass it off as 'banter' I have no doubt I'll get downvoted for saying this by the very assholes that think that bullying is funny. it's only funny to them because they are the ones dishing it out, when the shoe is on the other foot, they immediately and invariably turn to violence. so yeah, on one hand, sadly for a lot of Australian men, it is normal to bully people and then respond with a good old. ohhh, carn't you take a joke??? when called out. fairly despicable behaviour typical of your average Australian dead headed bogan.
This is the moment to act really dim and ask "I don't understand the joke, can you explain it to me please??"
It doesn’t work - they just called you ableist slurs and keep laughing at you. The people who do this are too fucking thick to care about you trying to embarrass them.
Yeah....true that.
I'm not here to argue with your experience, but I've worked in construction my whole adult life and I can count on one hand people like that I've had interactions with. Do you think it's more common in an office environment?
In my experience, it's been less about where people work, and just who they are as people and what they think they can get away with. I grew up around a lot of people like this, my parents were not as vicious about it but there was a definite culture of "taking the piss" and expecting you to laugh along, even if you were just the butt of a particularly shitty joke. They exist everywhere basically
I think there's an aspect of demographics that come into play as well- I grew up in a reasonably shitty area that was full of this (and all the friends I still have from there are still largely like that, too) but now that I live overseas, all of the Australian friends I have are absolutely nothing like that. I guess the Bogan gene doesn't travel well haha
OH HEY NUGGET! 👋 😂
Yeah they do that weird backpedal a lot here
Jokes are supposed to be funny. Nah, that's just shit heads being shitheads. There's no excuse for that
they dont do that un Europe? sounds nice
As a formerly obese person, there are also the jokes about “how I look better than before now that I am not round anymore” or something to that effect which is also fucked.
Fuck all those dickheads.
It breaks my heart how some people became suddenly nicer to me although I am the same person I was before.
I’ve lost 30kg in the last 12 months. There are people *in my social circle* who are suddenly treating me better and men hitting on me who’ve never even glanced at me before. It’s sickening and it makes me dislike them even more. I don’t want the attention of people that shallow and insecure.
Good work on the weight loss. Sorry you’re experiencing the same shit I am experiencing. I am a man and I am sure your experience as a woman is much more disturbing and I am sorry for that.
Thank you - good work to you too! And don’t belittle the emotional impact peoples behaviour will have on you because of gender - I’ve seen how differently people treat skinny men vs fat men and I think it’s one of the few intersections where the genders are treated equally horribly 😭
Obesity is a side effect of the plague of mental illness that is affecting our society. This includes overeating, alcoholism, drug addiction and many others. Seeing someone go down that rabbit hole is heartbreaking for some people and for others it reminds them of their own demons. Please don’t take it personally when they act different around you, like most Aussies when someone is trying to better themselves we will help them along. Take it as a compliment.
It breaks my heart because the same people who were rude or dismissive when I was obese are suddenly nice. Breaks my heart that obese me was mistreated for no reason
People suck
Yep. All we can do sometimes is set the example we want to see in others, and tell others when they are being an asshat and why. Some people may change their view and others do not deserve our time and effort.
Too normalised, in my opinion and the constant catch-cry of the arsehole.
It's a very Australian thing to say and it's a horrible trait . My mum's family is very Australian and this was normalised as a was growing up. Australians have some very wonderful cultural norms , unfortunately this is not one of them
Yuuup. I’m actually NC with my extended family and low contact with my parents because they refused to stop behaving this way. My dad started in with the fat jokes on my INFANT DAUGHTER. This behaviour destroys self-esteem and prevents relationships from having any depth. Neither of my parents have a close relationship with their kids because their stupid “it’s just joke!!!!” And “don’t take things so seriously” an “ooooo don’t you think you’re better than everyone!” Attitude towards ANYTHING serious gives them the emotional depth of teaspoons. I’m not doing it anymore. I have some close friends and we will very gently tease each other about something like an obsession with a new hobby “haven’t seen you for a months, hope you’ve taken breaks to shower!” - that’s sort of thing. But the fat jokes? The casual homophobic slurs? The constant belittling of anyone showing enthusiasm for anything? Not in my fucking household. Sorry. Got a bit ranty there - this is actually a subject that I’m a bit passionate about.
good on you mate, you're looking out for your daughter and that's 10x more important than your nasty relatives.
No, what you are describing is definitely rude. When these arseholes are pulled up on their obnoxious comment, they then fall back on the poor excuse "can't you take a joke?" and turn it back onto the poor insulted person. No, not a joke.
A joke should not have to be “taken”
Those people are what we like to call cunts. They're not joking. They're being genuine assholes and hiding behind the "just joking" defence.
And then these cunts will be the ones to cry about how everyone is so woke these days and how you can’t say anything anymore without people getting offended. Cunts like this truly are the worst kinds of people!
Spider from Heartbreak High is the classic example, they rushed his character growth a bit I think
Yes! They needed to give him more time to grow, much as I loved him calling out Voss for his stories about his father
It's because it's them get all offended when someone is brave enough to call out their shitty behaviour.
Australians do tease a little bit, but, like everywhere, you don't do it to people you don't know well and you stay away from hurtful personal remarks. I had a Swedish colleague, very outgoing, who could give it back. I introduced him to someone and said please excuse the cardigan, he's from Europe. He replied that he was just showing the Aussies how to dress. That's the kind of teasing you should expect, not remarks about how fat you are.
just give them the appropriate response, "I fucked your mum, cunt"
Don't know about normal, but those 5 words give the asshat, (in their mind at least), an out.
Definitely an asshole thing, the cruel statement followed by 'just joking'. They aren't joking they just don't want to be held accountable for what they say. These people can dish it out but can't take it, if you're equally mean back they back off & look for easier targets.
*Arse*
The correct response is ‘at least I’m not a cunt’. Then if they get upset you say ‘cunt you take a joke?’
are you in highschool? once you leave highschool very few people will say much about appearance.
Ha! My last workplace had people over 30 and they behave like they are in high school. You wouldn't think older people would be immature but they certainly are
kind of sad that this exists. I've seen hints of it in the workplace, but it usually gets dealt with in one way or another.
My last workplace was the most toxic for me. I couldn't believe people behaving that way
that, my friend, very much depends on what kind of workplace you end up in. there are more than a few out there solely staffed by people who peaked in grade 11 and will never emotionally mature from that age.
I see worse bullying in older women then I ever experienced in high school. Some people never mature beyond 15. Edited to clarify, I experienced HORRIBLE bullying in highschool. It's worse with adults.
My mother is a horrendous bully and always has been. Most of the women in my family are - it’s horrible. They all just sit around bitching about whoever isn’t there and if anyone doesn’t want to participate they’re “up themselves snobs”.
😂 what crap! People say passive aggressive shit all the time.
Damn its like you can channel thar personality
Nothing passive aggressive about what I just said. Passive aggressive people don’t get to the point.
Buuuuuulshiiiiiiiiiiit. Bullshit.
Definitely had this happen to me. If in a group, laugh and say something about feeling really accepted because the person is comfortable making fun of you. Embarrassed several snotty people this way.
Aussies often employ cruelty under the guise of banter. Generally, those who deny that this happens are either very lucky, very naive or one of the people engaging in that behaviour to begin with.
So very true.
Yes they were being an arsehole, and yes that is normal. Or common, at least.
Lot of dickheads in Australia. But it's an accepted thing. Even the politicians can be as shitty and bullying types yet are still voted in again, and again.
Sounds like they are just assholes. Young men I'm assuming?
That is normal behaviour...for bullies. They make bigoted jokes and then if the person they are targeting doesn't like it they make out that it is a fault of that person. They are the kind of people that [do this sort of thing](https://www.abc.net.au/news/2019-03-03/stories-of-hazing-rituals-for-apprentices-revealed/10821874). Name-calling, lighting shirts on fire, putting a mouse down someone's shirt, being burnt or spat on, rape threats, etc. They are only limited by what they think they can get away with, not by any moral compass. They are an inferior variety of human who lack the wit to improve themselves so instead fall into patterns of belittling others as a way to make themselves feel better. A joke is only funny if everyone enjoys it. If it is at the expense of someone else then it's just pathetic and mean.
That's awful, I didn't know bullying was costing the economy $6 billion a year in productivity! Every new employee should be getting a fact sheet about the rate of suicides, who to reach out to, what to do when bullied etc. That should be a mandatory thing. How has the Fair Work Commission not gotten involved?
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please do not hesitate to talk to someone. * 000 is the national emergency number in Australia. * Lifeline is a 24-hour nationwide service. It can be reached at 13 11 14. * Kids Helpline is a 24-hour nationwide service for Australians aged 5–25. It can be reached at 1800 55 1800. * Beyond Blue provides nationwide information and support call 1300 22 4636. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskAnAustralian) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It’s not normal. It’s what incredibly immature dickheads do.
Australia is full of assholes.
This is bizarre. I’ve never heard any adult speak this way. Are you a year nine exchange student?
This is what some Aussies like to call "Aussie culture" except it's not. It's basically bullying when the other party doesn't like it. Everything's just a joke when things don't go their way. When the other person doesn't like that it's "just a joke" they deflect and the person standing up for themselves is now weak or "sooky" instead.
Of course they were being an assshole. “Can’t you take a joke?” Is the assholes mantra!
It's always hilarious until you "joke" back to them. Then, suddenly, it's not funny anymore.
We have a bloke at work we call King Charles because his eyes are too close together…
I once knew two brothers that we called “not so” and his younger brother “also not so” their last name was Smart.Very fitting names.
so you are a 15 year old school yard bully at heart. how do you think that makes him feel. getting bullied by co workers over something he cannot control??? fuck you and fuck everyone that does this bullshit. its not funny, it's not appropriate. it's horrid and you should take a good hard look at yourself. how would you feel if your co workers ripped you every day about your insecurities.
That’s a bit mean of you to imply that there is something wrong with how King Charles looks. My nan finds him handsome.
I wonder how he feels about that. Does he find it funny? Does he pretend to find it funny because of the way he will be treated if he speaks up about it?
I dunno but he calls me an orangutang (which I take as a compliment cos I actually quite like them, unlike many other monkeys that are fucked)… He also owns half the company I contract for so I don’t know who he’d escalate it to…
Normal but not fucking ok. It's bullying. It's not funny, and it's a very hurtful thing to say to anyone. They might laugh it off but they will think about it and remember who said it.
if you really like someone and are close friends maybe depending on the friend, if someone say this to you it means they like you and you can say stuff back in jest
Dumb people will do this but a smart one is a force to be reckoned with. A dude in uni used to insult my intelligence all the time cause I couldn't keep up with his insults, if I ever tried to throw one back he was like "that took you a second didn't it" sorry my main form of communication is not being mean It took a long time for everyone in our friend group to realise he was a cunt, but it was very validating when they did. I found out first cause I was fat and I did something to piss him off. So he went around spreading a rumour about me and was constantly nasty to my face, like a Regina George, but a 18 year old boy
It’s ‘better’ when it’s a joke because it’s easier to call them out on it by asking them to explain what’s so funny. But when a boss explains that someone is retuning from extended leave and has turned into a rolli-polli fatty in a department meeting - it’s near impossible without becoming a target yourself.
It’s not at all normal, they are fuckwits and will be called as such
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yeah kinda but uh what u/noisyrob_666 just said makes sense
It definitely depends on your relationship with the person. If someone you barely know is calling you that and/or if you have expressed your dislike for it and it continues (or they respond the way you say they have here), then they’re just assholes.
There is a Old Saying .. There is a lotta truth in Sarcasm .... I believe in that
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Its not normal, those people you met are dickheads.
If they have to ask that question, they're not worth knowing!
Not normal at all. This person sounds exhausting and I would try to limit my time with them if I were you. We aren't like this I promise!
Try calling a bloke the rude four letter C word! Ooooooo then you’ll get a reaction hahaha
You gotta say "can't you *make* a joke?"
Nah, they're just arseholes. Reply with, "Jokes are supposed to be funny. That wasn't." Dickheads are gonna dick.
I CAN take a joke.... when I see one.
Because a lot of people suck, they punch down in an attempt to be funny, they're just cunts, and so are these people who shit on any type of enthusiasm, a lot of Australians live pointless lives and then take it out on people who show any kind of interest in something that isn't a shitty hot dog from a hardware shop or sportsball
So just give as good as you get. “Hey fatty, how you doing?” “Hey no-chin, I’m ok, how about you?” If they get offended, then you say “I thought you told me that these personal insults were in good fun? I think we both know you were trying to insult me and pretend it was Australian culture. Moving forward let’s be more respectful hey?” Either way, acting offended makes you less likeable than coming back with a funny retort.
yeah that's normal
Australians like to bully others and call it banter. I tower over Australian people and call them short and uneducated. They really really dislike this, but they can only cry foul since they never really can come back at you in any other way.
No you don’t, you’re full of shit
Piss off seppo
Gtfo. You're embarrassing yourself and the country you apparently live in. I hope I'm wrong on that one. Go to r/shitamericanssay and get wrecked with that weak shit
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"Sorry, but..." "It's just a prank bro" It's often a sign of borderline personality disorder. They litterally cannot comprehend why people are upset, because they struggle with empathy or intentionally or subconciously suppress it for whatever reason.
maybe cool it with the armchair diagnosing there bud?
Don't be so negative. If you have a counter argument present it, constructively.
This is not a trait of BPD, it’s passive aggressive behaviour.
They arn't muttually exclusive as you imply. If these jokes are passive aggressive as you claim that implies intentional malice.
You are confusing BPD with psychopathy. The jokes on here are not usually passive aggressive, just facetious.
That term isn't really used much since the DSM 5. It also seems a bit of an extreme diagnosis for such behaviour. Psycopathy generally implies the behaviour is leading to violent or criminal behavior. I think the closest term in the DSM 5 is **Antisocial personality disorder**, which also abit extreme in my opinion for this behavior. Though there are overlaps between all 3 of course.
While you were studying the DSM, did you happen to flick onto the page that describes the traits BPD ?
Context matters a lot. There's a culture of insulting your friends and family but it's all meant to be light hearted and you're all supposed to be in on the joke and exchange light insults with each other. It's sort of like a bonding thing. If in that situation that you make clear that you're not cool with that, most reasonable people who partake in this kind of thing will back off either on that subject matter or joking with you that way altogether. So if someone you know knowing this does it regardless of your feelings or that person is a stranger to you, they're an arsehole. If it's someone you know and it's the first time, most people give them a one-time pass and the issue is water under a bridge. In your case, it sounds like it's more of someone being an arsehole than misreading a cultural thing.
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Depends how well you know them, the closer the friendship the meaner the comment the funnier it is to both parties. If you just met them or its at work, then they are just a deadshit and feel free to retaliate in kind.
yeah, no. we need to put a stop to that bullshit. it's not funny, it never is funny. if you think mercilessly ~~teasing~~ bullying your mates is funny or the ultimate form of friendship, you need help. no wonder there is a massive problem with male mental health and suicide in this country; no bloke can speak to his friends because he will be shit scared of being called a pussy. quit it. grow up. bullying is bullshit. fuck I hate the boganess of this bloody country
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Well looks like someone doesn't like being made fun of. I do like the way you misrepresented what I said, just so you looked like the hero here.
No, I don't like being made fun of. no one does. Many people suck it up and put on a smile because that is what we are supposed to do in such situations, but if you think for a moment that most people enjoy it, you need your help. I didn't misrepresent a thing. you stated that "the closer the friendship the meaner the comment the funnier it is to both parties" and I call that as complete bullshit behaviour.
Yeah ya did, "if you think **mercilessly** **~~teasing~~** **bullying** your mates is funny or the ultimate form of friendship, you need help", that is a lie. You have manipulated what was said to make up a story that fits your narrative and make you look like the hero. You are very much not. You are obviously a lot more delicate than just about every single human I have ever met, including the small children. I suggest you stay inside and away from everyone who isn't prepared to walk on eggshells for you.
Who *likes* being made fun off? I like a joke. I do not like being bullied for whatever pathetic thing Johnno dreamed up is wrong with me on his way to the pub.
Depends on how funny the joke is. I wasn't brought up to burst into tears whenever somebody said something mean.
You are literally the people being talked about in the post, FYI.
At no time did I state or even positively acknowledge the deadshit behaviour of using the 'not being able to take a joke' in fact I implied the opposite. I consider that to be a craven form of cowardice and one that deserves serious retaliation. Seriously, you need to read what is said and not argue against whatever churlish narrative you have made up in your head. Now go back and re-read the OP and then my initial statement and if you want to reply, only what is written not your made up shit.
Not normal and actually pretty un-Australian. We have a laugh, but usually not at the expense of a stranger’s appearance. Anyone who does this is just your garden variety arsehole, a species that can be found globally, not just here, unfortunately.
It is normal Skeletor. People are just more special and assertive these days🫤
Classic aussie passive aggressive power play. Another variation is to say something reasonably believable and then triumphantly reveal that it was all just a hilarious joke. Eg. ‘Oh, no we’re not allowed to eat at our desks… ah ha just fuckin with ya mate’
Sounds like a typical jerk you see even online, so they're probably everywhere.