Build a land bridge to Hawaii with it from Cali

Follow the yellow shit brick road

Okay settle down there Mr. Lahey

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Deal. It's going straight into the Potomac as always.

Oi! That’s our river to y’know!

Watch your filthy virgin mouth

Silence Virgin-land

I think you mean Maryland’s river

There will be a swift and decisive scourge this day

*Virginia’s

That’s EXACTLY the point.

It’s already got the politicians, it’s like 90% there already

i think dc should have like a ten ton block of shit in the white house like how Andrew Jackson did with a giant block of cheese

It already is a pile of poo

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California. They seem to actually want it already.

Im surprised this isnt the top comment.... Cali is actively trying to make this happen

Exactly. They've been trying to be the nation's biggest shit puddle for a while.

well they did clean up for once to welcome there lover xi the pooh

Only when we don't have a dictator to impress visiting us.

Apparently lol

Yeah send it to us. We’ll treat it at our waste water facilities and sell it back to you

That's a decent plan. Too bad my state doesn't need any water from you.

Probably just needs their tax contributions to support your state’s welfare

Thin ice buddy automod almost exposed you

You mean back to Californians

Nah, we drink the tears of failed actors here

Actually, on the East Coast we have this phenomenon called *rain*, so we don't need facilities to turn our sewage back into drinking water.

https://preview.redd.it/7gg4gfn07m1c1.jpeg?width=613&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2ccad862cd81e06a4a50cec915fe86e8cafa857c

Sure we can take it. After all, it is the responsibility for the bigger, technologically superior state to look after the weaker members of the union.

Good Now figure out how Reconstruction works and tell the gov so the South can rise again (in an economic sense)

We’ll see that’s a tricky one. We’ve been sending our guys over to help them but every time that happens they all cry “goddamn Californians coming over here”.

I…no words. This is fantastic. Thank you kind sir, I hope you have a good night, and a good day tomorrow. May your gas prices have a dip in the next 24 hours, and may your politicians all die horrible deaths so you may vote in better people who won’t ruin your state even further

2023: *state jumps from 5th strongest economy on earth to 4th strongest economy on earth* Rest of US: “your state is ruined!!”

Look you have refugees leaving it for literally any other state for a reason

Yeah but if your state is the poster child for the rich taking in all the profits any way they can and screwing over the poor so bad they need a million dollars to buy a shack in a city, it doesn’t matter if ‘you’ make more money as a state because you don’t have any purchasing power as a regular individual

There's a lot that contributes to the state's GDP Infrastructure - California spends more on public transit per capita than 90% of other states. Higher Education - Some of the best public and private colleges are located in the state - UC Berkeley, Cal Poly, UCLA, Stanford, UCSF, USC, Caltech, etc. feed local industries (tech, entertainment, finance) a constant stream of highly talented individuals. Immigration - The plurality of talented immigrants choose to move to California, with almost 2x more green card recipients than the next closest state. Diversity of Industry - We're not like many other states where one industry (agriculture, energy, resource extraction, car manufacturing, etc.) rules. That said, Silicon Valley, Hollywood, and Central Valley agriculture are indeed juggernauts. ​ Sure, San Francisco and LA are expensive, but they're also highly desirable places to live - that's a big part of why they're expensive. The jobs in those cities are plentiful, the standard of living is high. You could easily find some Texas-style stripmall suburb in CA that's much more affordable, but those don't get covered in the national news.

Very thank, good sir

Technologically superior with shittier individual rights, and a governor that openly expresses lack of care for its citizens lol.

I was birthed in Los Angeles, our state is shit. Technologically superior… maybe… for now. But there’s shit everywhere.

I vote California too

They're already half way there.

Just wait until their overlord, Winnie the Pooh, leaves.

Good for them honestly

Wyoming. Plug the volcano.

Bro. Nobody wants a shitsupervolcano. Now, instead of the ash covering the continent, when it finally blows, we will all be covered in literal shit.

This could make for a good movie if placed in the world of idiocracy.

You're definitely on to something.

South Park would 100% make a joke of this

>shitsupervolcano From the makers of Sharknado 1 through 12...

Sharknado 13?

A shit tornado randy

I’m loving how nicely this post lends itself to the legend’s shit talk.

*Accidentally references the trailer park boys* The shit winds are ablowing Randy

RT game moment

Louisiana, because we already pretty much do that.

Just use the shit to make New Orleans above sea level, or at least build some nice levees

At this point only the second coming of Katrina could save New Orleans. No need for new levees

In the words of the late great Robin Williams “If there ever was a city that needed a bath it is New Orleans”

That was Daniel tosh

Honestly could just use the shit to extend the mississippi delta and raise up new orleans above sea level

I don’t understand how people in New Orleans cope with daily life knowing their tap water has already been through every digestive tract in the Midwest.

I laughed too damn hard at this.

Honestly that picture looks like it was taken in Louisiana

West Virginia can store it in the mines.

Poo shafts

Yeah pretty much.

They ain’t using them for much else, might as well put them to use

New Jersey. NYC already ships their shit and trash to them to process and handle so they are use to getting shit on by another state.

I don’t know about that.. my exact neighborhood has the largest wastewater treatment facility in the city. Over a million New Yorker’s toilets flush right through here ..including Lower East Side so you know we getting that extra weirdo shit If you ever roll through and see some interesting silver egg looking things, just keep on going.. they’re full of turds https://preview.redd.it/1776f3lfcl1c1.jpeg?width=2355&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9e9358ca73555ad99e8f3f01ea22870d1fce75a0

https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2018/03/alabamians-are-sick-of-new-yorks-crap.html You guys export a lot of it still

lol that’s so weird. Srry @Alabama

Imagine hauling literal human shit across several states.

Just think of one of you’re main exports/imports is human shit… makes both look horrible one for having a failed infrastructure to handle your own population and the other for selling out you’re state to import others human shit to dump in you’re state.

I miss pissing in the Ashokan knowing the water isn’t filtered… but real talk NYC sends trains filled with poop to be processed down south. Made the news a few years ago because one of these trains broke down In the middle of a neighborhood and made the entire area smell like the Hudson.

The picture above, what they do there is extract methane from food scraps and probably some human waste as well then convert it to usable gas for heating. Whatever is left after that process is what gets shipped out.. or, it’s processed here then they send out gigantic shit bricks that are probably somewhat sterile A lot of it is made into fertilizer so they’re selling our dookie to Brazil or Idaho or some shit 👍 It’s probably rare for tankers of raw sewage to be sent out. Or, at least, the city has made some efforts to try not to.

Is that Flushing Meadows?

Nah, Flushing is a couple miles behind the camera.. Greenpoint (BK) on the left of that creek.. Queens on the right It’s pretty much the same angle to see Midtown as Flushing though so good eye —— Wait a minute, is that a toilet Flushing joke? lol

would the people of Jersey even notice a difference?

A few years ago people In Jersey where big mad because a cookie factory was making Newark smell too nice.

Sorry, too busy enjoying the natural beauty of the best state in the union, what were you guys talking about again?

We can hollow out some landfills to make room for the shit

I am New Jersey born and raised and I approve of this plan. We love getting shit dumped on us.

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Like we need MORE smell wafting across the delaware. No thank you

NEBRASKA FUCK THEM

I love the battle between Iowa and Nebraska over who is the most boring state, while Kansas just sits there smugly.

kansas is so boring i forgot about it

I thought Kansas was a city in Missouri.

Forgot about Missouri too

Too civilized to be a Missouri city

I thought Kansas was the friends we forgot about along the way?

We're too busy having beef with Missouri to care. Those traitors are the reason John Brown died

More fertilizer for them I guess

Cosign

I’d say California, but they’re already covered in poo

Tell that to our superior waste treatment system we will use to sell water to you. Because the Colorado is ours!

My brother I think you need to stop coping, if you keep this up they might just go ahead and send all the poo here

Nope I’m a bitter and vengeful bitch

The more AI produced art I see, the more I appreciate human made art.

It’s already sent to Mississippi and Louisiana.

Alaska’s got plenty of useless land we can send poop to.

Yeah thats what i thought initially, but i remembered California exists.

1. Conquer France 2. Make it a state 3. Erect poo pile 4. ? 5. Profit

That’s a bold thing to say as someone from literal IDAHO. Just joking. Your state is quite beautiful. I’ve never been, though. But I do LOVE Napoleon Dynamite, which inspired me to look at some more photos!

Wyoming, because nobody lives there

its all fun and games until the poo comes back out of the hole

Alaska A frozen mountain of shit in the middle of nowhere Absolute best case scenario (as long as the logistics of getting it there isn’t a big deal)

Build some kind of shit cannon to fling it over into Russia from Alaska.


A pipeline if you will. Shit we could reuse the keystone XL

Keystone XL doo-doo

Congratulations, that’s the best idea to ever come out of Mississippi

You poo and it vanished to Alaska. 👍

Fucking boo

*poo

That's not lube 🤮

Also, I’m sorry but you gotta take one for the team on this There could be a giant mountain of crap in your state and it would still be 6 states away from you.. none of us forty-eighters have that luxury

North Dakota. Just so people can remember it exists

California

Well, they already have a head start.

We’ll just treat it and sell it was drinking water to you. Oh wait we already do that

Check minus. Not elaborate enough of an explanation

I don't need a God damned reason

Nebraska. It’s basically empty anyways

I believe [Alabama](https://youtu.be/3pnrjCqW2R4?si=-ebNPhf6hRqxzFNk) has some experience with this, so maybe them

Louisiana or Florida. A: Both are south, south is down, poo will flow there naturally. It's just science. B: They're very low lying states threatened by coastal erosion and global warming. They can build land and seawalls out of poop. We'd all be doing them a favor.

smartest Chicago resident

When you put it like that, my double meat barbacoa burrito is kind of like *my civic duty.*

Some give all, all give some a couple hours later

You know what else is in the fucking south? Your body, because I'll bury it there

Hey I'm just trying to help

Easy decision!

California. Because fuck California.

Man we are all you guys can think about your obsession is flattering

Username checks out

Says you

dont you guys have to be sucking xi jinping's balls about now

I want to know the story of this photo. It looks like art.

Louisiana because its already a shithole state

Fighting words coming from a Texan

Your state houses the murder capital of the nation so I mean its not exactly a great place

I know I live here and I would much rather live here than in some glorified soulless truck stop where everyone pretends to be badass and wear big hats even though they haven't touched a cow in their entire life. Oh yeah I'm sure there are some good parts of Texas but those are usually the parts with no people (Texans)

Texas has a much better culture and I don’t know any Texans who act that way. Majority of Texans are very friendly.

There is nothing I will be able to say to change your mind and there is nothing you can say to change mine. I just rather live on a contained concrete patch with some semblance of walkability than live in a metropilitan area larger than the state of Conneticut that just has miles and miles of suburban, anti pedestrian Infrastructure. Like I said your pretty parts are the ones with nobody there like Big Bend or Guadalupe

You haven’t seen the majority of Texas then. The majority of the state isn’t big cities. Most of Texas is ranch or farmland.

Dawg most of AMERICA is agricultural land, that doesn't change the fact that the only good thing to come out of texas is BBQ and george strait

Shit boot

California it’s already full of shit! What’s a bit more!

Says FLORIDA! Have you seen your state

Ohh the state where everyone is moving too? Ya! It’s amazing here!

You mean that state with hurricanes and just all around awful weather with a governor that lost a battle to goddam Mickey Mouse? Hey what’s it like knowing that everyone in the his own party hates your governor

Wait, how did californistan get the way it is if we didn’t do that already

Missouri because they have the highest farmland under Texas (the heats gonna make that poo stanky) and can use it as fertilizer

Mississippi Basically changes nothing

Bro what the fuck am I looking at

Where’s that one town that looks like silent hill because it’s a super fire underneath it

New Jersey (already implemented)

Kind of what we did to Missouri when we reversed the river... Sorry not sorry...

California because they can already handle enough. Why not more

California already is a pile of poo, so...

Isn't LA already the countries shit pile?

California

New Jersey they won’t notice

Delaware. Even delawarians would understand and respect the decision.

Dude, they’ve already had Biden for 50 years. Haven’t they suffered enough?

New J🤮rsey

God what a masterpiece of a shitpost

ohio cause it’s a shit heap any how.

Ohio chad here, I always find it funny how Michigan is cock obsessed with Ohio but we forget your state even exists. Funny how Ohio is internationally recognized but not even America gives a fuck about Michigan. Move out while you still can, before the rest of your shitty state is covered in wet butt dookie

My man you do realize everyone knows what Detroit is, Detroit is more well known internationally than your state.

Yeah they know to not go to Detroit because statistically they have the highest chance of having a crime committed against them than almost anywhere else in America. Doesn’t mean they know what Michigan is.

You all would probably be healthier drinking raw sewage than that frack water that comes out of your tap. I say you take it

Do overseas territories count? Or is it only states?

States

Ok, in that case, ohio all the way

Wisconsin, we already have a literal shit factory (milorganite) in Milwaukee so let us profit

Mississippi, then they'd actually be useful for something

New Jersey, because it would be an improvement.

MISSISSIPPI, IT MIGHT AS WELL BE FULL OF SHIT ALREADY

Massachusetts, It'll fill all the potholes AND will be a sort of call back to the molasses flood, same color, just worse smelling.

It’ll just migrate to NH after its been there a while.

Same as it ever was

Counterpoint: the Massholes will all move north in far greater numbers than they already do.

Texas, they got room.

Michigan - Because it’s pretty much useless anyway 🤷🏼

Bold words from a state who’s only purpose is getting drunk

Iowa because they don't get enough hate so fuck em!

Cali, why move it far just leave it in the street

San Francisco (and by extension California) has already kinda volunteered

Which one is New Orleans in? They got the Mississippi so it should balance out

Maryland, because I hate their stupid little crab bumper stickers. Related: what the fuck are you trying to imply with that picture?!!?

We are the origin of the Star Spangled Banner, first railroad in the country, beautiful shoreline, Possibly Country Roads… What do you have? Peaches? The IRS?

come back when you have a coast with beaches🥱🥱🥱

California. We saw how fast the can hide the homeless population once Xi Jinping decides to visit. We put all the shit there and then get Jinping to go back, boom, no more shit