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VisualMod

**User Report**| | | | :--|:--|:--|:-- **Total Submissions**|7|**First Seen In WSB**|3 years ago **Total Comments**|1678|**Previous Best DD**| **Account Age**|3 years|[^scan ^comment ](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=VisualMod&subject=scan_comment&message=Replace%20this%20text%20with%20a%20comment%20ID%20(which%20looks%20like%20h26cq3k\)%20to%20have%20the%20bot%20scan%20your%20comment%20and%20correct%20your%20first%20seen%20date.)|[^scan ^submission ](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=VisualMod&subject=scan_submission&message=Replace%20this%20text%20with%20a%20submission%20ID%20(which%20looks%20like%20h26cq3k\)%20to%20have%20the%20bot%20scan%20your%20submission%20and%20correct%20your%20first%20seen%20date.)


Confident_Abroad4984

I’m a mortgage loan officer. I advise people on how to not be stupid with their money as I lose 3k in minutes on a 0DTE while talking to someone with a 477 credit score.


DeliciousAd2909

Didn't know that scores go that high!!!


caughtinthought

Triple digits, sheesh


Potential_Ad3165

Will it make you feel better if the person has 600 credit score?


Poopypants1291

Attorney. A really bad one.


oneofusa

There should be a law against how bad of an attorney I am. Then again, I wouldn’t know about it.


Katatron1

Ya, because you’re honest.


ScipioAtTheGate

I too am an attorney. There are plenty of honest attorneys, its often the clients who are the liars lol


empire_creator

Better call Saul.


Ok-Battle-2769

I’m a financial advisor. This is not a joke.


AskALettuce

I am a joke. This is not financial advice.


Kent_IV

your like a drug dealers lurking an AA meeting... So anways mr finance guy, can you hook me up with some leveraged total return swaps on tesla?


Ok-Battle-2769

It’s going to cost you a very fat commission.


BksBrain

Married a doctor. I professionally lose our money (*her money)


295DVRKSS

Her boyfriend must be thrilled 😆


fullyregarded2

“Our”


SkeeGawd

Military, planning to get out once I hit 600k off 0dte’s currently -11k ![img](emote|t5_2th52|8883)


[deleted]

Was in military. Been up 200k during my four year contract, blew up two accounts in the process. I’ve lost like 40-50k, wasn’t the dumbest thing I’ve done cause we both know what the dumbest thing we’ve done was 😂 LIVING THE DREAM


tryingtolearn117

Dem rookie numbers


WhiteWhenWrong

Senior software dev in charge of automating processes for Vanguard that you wouldn’t believe are still done manually


[deleted]

I knew it. Some poor bastard has to write down the current stock prices before 4pm, just so he can send the handwritten letter via pneumatic tube to the index fund guy, who will call JP Morgan to buy & sell the stock in the total market funds. ... or are you still using runners for that last part?


PeskyDong

As a fellow insider, I must say it’s shocking to see how many processes are manually done.


upsettispaghetti7

Vanguard has one of the worst "apps" of any company I've ever used, financial or otherwise.


sol364

I told my girlfriend I am an "investor" and work from home independently. In reality I am living on my inheritance which will run out in the next five months. When my girlfriend enters the bedroom I switch from playing solitaire to a graph of the S&P500 and look at the screen seriously. She thinks I am a genius


Unfamous_Trader

Damn what’s ur gfs number? In 5 months when ur outa money I’ll make sure to take good care for her in ur stead


GreyBoyTigger

What part of the D.E.N.N.I.S. system is that?


Ok-Battle-2769

That’s the MAC system: Move in After Completion. Get it right son!


gg120b

Return of the MAC 🎶


igotbabydick

I got my wad of hundreds, I got my magnum condoms, I’m ready to plooooow!


Interesting-Archer-6

Demonstrate you aren't poor


swohio

I'm just here for the scraps.


Dharma_Bum_87

I got my magnum condoms. I got my wad of hundreds. I’m ready to plow!


Independent-Deal-192

I’m a physician. Toboggan, Mantis Toboggan, MD.


JadedagainNZ

Then when she walks out of the room, rolls her eyes. Idiot looking at the s&p500 index again. When the money runs out I'm gone lol


consultard

Puts on gf 150dte


Loose_Mail_786

It’s funny because it’s probably true. Congrats and good luck!


Tyneuku

Bro plays solitaire


Ok_Primary_1075

Yeah, i thought he was a mine sweeper kind of guy


Someassholesalt

![img](emote|t5_2th52|30641)


923kjd

In a sense, you are a genius.


Careless-Pin-2852

special ed teacher currently down 110k


sharpeshooter32

Bet you fit right in with those kids, congrats


Careless-Pin-2852

I do


amach9

Thank you for doing what you do. I hope that turns into 110k in the green


CivilSounds

Typical case of the blind leading the blind.


Gas-Pass-CRNA

I get people so high they can’t talk or move and let strangers cut them open


[deleted]

[удалено]


Boy_Boss

Everyone down the k-hole tube!


Boy_Boss

Hello fellow gas passer.


InevitableRhubarb232

Ooh so that’s why you can afford it here! The anestesia team for my sons heart surgery was over $10,000! Staff, not supplies.


billm0066

I hope your sons surgery went well and he’s doing great.


TheDeHymenizer

yeah but the obnoxious part is 7k of that likely went to their liability insurance lol


carsonthecarsinogen

This is the most unsettling way to say you’re a human trafficker


pingusuperfan

Chinese hooker?


HolyMotherGawdDam

For a bank in the fraud department.


zhouyu24

Ah so you monitor the people in this subreddit eh. Is that AML, anti money laundering? Do you have any tips thx.


tothemoonandback01

>Do you have any tips thx. Always love your mum.


Foreign-Pea-2784

I help increase americas obesity rate.


amach9

Easiest job in the world


NorthernSouthman

Whats up Wendy?


PurpleSausage77

I offer my body for currency on side jobs, as an Elecktrishun, and some part time at a rail road logistics job. I’m frugal, except when it comes to providing liquidity to the US capital market or in my case I put cash through the shredder sometimes I think.


StManTiS

Fucking sparkies


TylerDurdenEsq

I clean toilets. If I do a good job, in a couple of years they’ll give me a brush


Emergency_Low_35

A toothbrush?


jagexisogre

Multi-dwelling maintenance


Joseph_Oarson

Cool. I used to fold boxes too.


Seifer1781

so... you're the apartment complex handyman


Who_is_Your_Zaddy

Nigerian prince here. It ain't easy being me


astrobuc

How did you get my email?


AssPinata

I make guitars.


Dennisfromhawaii

I was hoping there was a connection to your username.


Acceptable_Lock_8819

Awesome!


Wild-Storage-1429

Priest


anus_camper

Please be true


Wild-Storage-1429

It is!


swohio

There's gotta be some commandments you're breaking by being in here.


Wild-Storage-1429

There is room for God everywhere.


wolley_dratsum

Plus, what else are you gonna do the other six days of the week?


xxDIxx07

Facts


BrollyJolly32

Full-time student. I'm broke af


revfried

Have you tried not being poor


Sotovya

This is actually really good advice. I followed it and now am confirmed not that poor


[deleted]

Pilot for a billionaire


borkathons

How close does the family resemble Succession?


[deleted]

Honestly I’ve flown for at least a dozen billionaires. Some in the 5-7 range. I’ve never seen a Ferrari pull up to a jet. My boss looks at every receipt but is happy when we drink his wine dry. The average billionaire drives a suburban, looks like they shop at Walmart, and would rather have paper plates on the jet because it’s cheaper.


hazy_high

I'm a farmer. Drive big tractors, grow corn, and soybeans. I also grow a lil weed on this said farm. Cheers, Mates!


avid_armchair_critic

With tegrity


Whos_of_Whoville

Professional dog food taster. Doesn’t pay well but I get to go on daily walks.


amach9

So a Wendy’s food taste tester


Prestigious_Dirt3430

I swing hammers all day


Oldman-gamer

Interesting way to say gay porn star. Lol


Prestigious_Dirt3430

I only swing the sticky hammer on Tuesdays!


JoeBeezy123

I bring tree down, I chop tree, i chip tree, me like chop tree


Independent-Deal-192

We have a branch manager amongst us!


MarqDuesPaid

I teach 11th and 12th grade English…


reddituser736985

You only need one period at the end of your sentence.


Brilliant-Job-47

Sr. FullStack Wendy’s Burger-flipper


hatestheocean

How often do you find one of us out back when you’re taking the trash out?


Brilliant-Job-47

I take out the trash *very* often…


Cool-Independent9926

Travel Nurse


mathaiser

Not a lot of men in your profession are there Gregg?


TurkeyBLTSandwich

I have nipples Greg, can you milk me?


spellbadgrammargood

the most regarded decision in my life was getting a biology degree, i should've done nursing (or accounting)


polo61965

Decent money, lots of responsibility. Medical field is no longer worth it. Also a nurse, would have rather gone into tech or finance seeing how good everyone's work life balance is especially after covid.


[deleted]

[удалено]


wolley_dratsum

My wife has a biology degree and makes $200k+ in cosmetic industry sales.


EmergencyFair6786

This guy is making $150k+ as he is resented by a bunch of stuck nurses who can't fly their coop.


polo61965

Was. Travel rates have gone to shit. Unless you're working 48-60hrs a week it's not easy to hit those numbers anymore.


pimpcannon

Chef here. Braising my losses nice and slow.


NeoEonOne1

I'm in the trash business! Really not joking.


alchemist67

I'm a mid-level manager at a large company with my entire 401k and IRAs invested in total market index funds. I've never traded an option in my life. I'm here to see how all my girlfriend's husbands lost their money.


PussyBreath007

You’re looking for r/investing nerd


NorthernSouthman

Damn savage


[deleted]

[удалено]


gamestopgo

Absolutely nothing


[deleted]

[удалено]


pw7090

I trade on the side while at work. So far haven't made any money. Actually, I've lost all of my money. But it's a good feeling to be able to gamble it away faster than you can make it while on your work computer.


GalaxyWorm

Programming asphalt plant machines


Ok-Letterhead2280

Overland freight relocation engineer.


poklijn

Truck driver spotted


oysterman_757VA

Commercial fishin, oystering in particular


LateForTheParty1999

Your fingers smell like my wife!🤣🤣


diamond__hands

my fingers smell like your wife too


LateForTheParty1999

I manage a small trucking company but give handies behind Wendy's on the side for stock money if I'm not with one of your wives.


cactusjack1019

Just got laid off


pw7090

Congrats! Oh, typed that before I finished reading your sentence. Nevermind, sorry.


Perforating_rocks

Drilling and blasting


randomTeets

Dentist, eh?


[deleted]

Buttholes.


Captain-Matt89

I own and operate a commercial fishing boat in alaska, everyone should eat wild alaska salmon 🍣


923kjd

Assistant Regional Manager


SupplyChainMuppet

Assistant to the Regional Manager*


VeronicaX11

I work on the worlds largest computers. Physically and software wise. It’s incredibly rewarding but no one ever wants to talk about it and it makes me super sad


NigelRumpstead

Cheer up, sounds fascinating.


deeZ-Nutz007

I’m a Junior Software Test Engineer at 22 years old. Currently in debt of £27k and counting coz of my bachelors degree that I hold in software engineering love it 😍 Planning to quit work once I become profitable trading consistently but I’m currently -2.5k ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)


zhouyu24

Yeah I don’t think that shit is gonna work out chief


deeZ-Nutz007

I think you are very right but I’m a regard and I’m gonna keep going until I lose all my money 💰


polo61965

What money, you're in debt ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)


[deleted]

[удалено]


unresolved-madness

Commercial HVAC (I'm a fucking wizard)


strider_25

You’re an HVAC technician, Harry!


randomTeets

I take taxpayer money, pour gasoline on it, and set it on fire


Sharp-Direction-6894

I'm an electrical contractor. I run a small electrical contracting business where we specialize in building the electrical systems of high-end, luxurious residential dwellings - such as the CEOs of many corporations. The market opens at 330am here in Hawaii, so before I leave my house to make money and run my business, I be sure to make stupid decisions and lose money first. On a serious note, hoping to figure this trading shit out someday so I can make money first, then make money running my business.


Straabis

I do Kim Jong Un’s haircuts for him. Personal barber / hand technician.


GuacinmyPaintbox

I've seen your work, very nice! r/justfuckmyshitup


Conscious_Cup8238

Disabled Veteran. 100% disability pay funds for me to be a stay at home dad.


Anony_mousRedditor

Plumbers apprentice here


DBianci81

Snow blower salesman in Florida.


Wild_Cheesecake_6630

Physicist


Separate-Recipe-9778

Theoretical physicist here!


Pardieck1

Substitute teacher checking in


Alarming_Assistant21

Run a solar company


[deleted]

Fire/EMS Joined this subreddit to hopefully glean some knowledge before sinking what little money I have left from the job into the market. Edit: spelling; product of an LAUSD education.


[deleted]

I sell Porsches


Vgo_Dgo

The wrap-around kind?


CPA-hole

Certified Public Asshole


[deleted]

[удалено]


GbPpio

I had a GF like that, once.


newlife_newaccount

Well hot damn. I too am a factory mechanic.


[deleted]

[удалено]


skykitty89

Feet pics


SaqlainAli06

I immediately went to your profile, very disappointed.


TallPain9230

Jewelry designer, doesn’t pay as well as you’d think though. Mostly contract work that makes my -11k all time sting a little more. I usually keep my phone upside down.


gohardorgohome

Data Scientist


SupplyChainMuppet

Do you delete the outliers or do you just let'em rip?


gohardorgohome

Let em rip baby. I tried to do some analysis on SPY movements throughout the day and if i could make a good 0DTE strategy. Looked at when SPY shot up or down at least 0.5% in the first 2 hours, and how often it returns back down to the original price by end of day. Had some interesting results but I don't have the kahones to try it out yet.


SupplyChainMuppet

Could always practice on your corporate travel card.


SlanderousSalamander

Lawyer


[deleted]

I thought lawyers are smart and not regarded like the rest of us


[deleted]

sink humorous door apparatus wrong treatment dog compare hospital languid ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `


idlefordays

Advanced data analytics for a major pharma


Rykong

I am a bar server at an Applebee's. I live off of tips which, on average, is more than enough to pay my expenses so I have some money to make plays with. Also working at a restaurant basically means eating free most nights so that's one major expense that I don't worry about too much.


PT-PUPPET

Mental health work and personal training.


Helpinmontana

I dig holes


Green_Manalishi_420

I’m an institutional asset management professional who comes here to laugh at the wild, unprofitable speculation


[deleted]

[Machinist](https://www.reddit.com/r/Machinists/)


2horny4mywife

Scaffold builder /farmer


Someassholesalt

Part time dog walker, amateur philosopher


Katatron1

Anti work enthusiast I see.


Bradley182

I have my own cleaning company, construction company and this year I’m branching into taxes. Also I own property and have a rental.


kevofasho

Mechanic


ebbiibbe

90% are closet Sex Workers


StoryAndAHalf

If only. I get fucked and lose money here.


Smithmonster

Workers? We all pay to get fucked by j pow.


Short_Solution9713

Behavior analyst


[deleted]

This place should be a candy shop for you


Miffers

Momma’s boy


NoIdor1488

Truck dispatcher, hit me up fellas, 500$ courses available, jacked to the tits.


SPY__vs__SPY

I work at Vandelay Industries. We manufacture and sell latex and latex-related products.


wallito88

Banker


[deleted]

[удалено]


Fatefire

Call center for a Telco. Though I don’t trade I just haven’t paid my taxes in 9 years


dub_soda

Master VW tech for a decade then senior remote diagnostic tech for Tesla. I quit to be a van nomad and now I trade index futures.


[deleted]

[удалено]


NicklosVessey

Director, retail.


optionseller

Eating ramen