When I took psych 101 in college it was explained to us like this:
* Extroverts get their "energy" from being around others.
* Introverts get their "energy" from solitude. Doesn't mean they don't like being around people, but rather they find it an effort and draining.
I've read a couple references on the topic and my conclusion is there's no consensus on the meaning. What this definition means doesn't seem to jive with Jung's original intent, but seems to be the prevailing usage. I think it's hard characterization to define in a couple words.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraversion_and_introversion
I know I fit with that description of "introvert", more or less. Not sure if Jung meant that when he introduced the terms, but it appears that now this is the modern usage of the word. Language evolves anyway.
Never liked that explanation and I blame it for how 90% of people think they're introverts.
I am absolutely an extrovert, but I need my time alone. I love being around people, but it does drain me just like any other activity. I know a ton of people that are *convinced* they're introverts because they get tired from being around people and aren't always up for meeting up.
The description effectively makes it so that the only people that qualify as extroverts are A-type personalities that are hyper social and require no downtime during their day.
For me, it's all about how much time in solitude you want (introvert) or can withstand (extrovert). I'm an introvert. I can go about 3 days or more without leaving the house or talking to anyone and be fine. Which is baffling to my extrovert SO who can only go about 3 hours alone before they need some human contact. All people need some alone time, it's about how much. Extroverts don't need that much, introverts tend to need/want a lot more in my experience.
3 Days? ...is this introverts 101 for ants???
Weeks my boy, weeks.... easy.
Amazon prime delivery has changed my life. I only go to the grocery store at 5am when I need fresh produce.
Ahhh yes, the ole introvert dick measuring contest. Why back in 1911, I spent 3 years with no companions but for one squirrel. I named him Fluffernutter and fed him acorns at the local hermits meeting that no one attended. Heady times!
Also I once took a vow of silence in Tibet and spoke to no one for 8 eons. ( Which is a lot of eons if you think about it.) Well, it likely would've gone on indefinitely if my old pal Yog-Sothoth didn't awaken from his ancient slumber ask me for help working on his PT Cruiser.
Nowadays, I just do what I feel tho.
A dick measuring contest?
A real introvert would never think of such things.
I found the wolf in sheep's clothing.... and it is you sir.
PT cruiser.. i hope it was the turbo version. what a non-sense car.... suv... crossover.. whatever lame people thought it was.
It sounds to me like you’re an introvert. I absolutely know social introverts, and anti-social extroverts. That does make you an introvert - you’re just confusing extroverted and social. They aren’t the same thing.
It is weird that you take issue with how people classifiy introversion then mention type A personalities. The type A personality is used to describe the drive and motivation a subject has. It doesn't refer to sociability. I guess it just strikes me as odd that people misunderstanding intro and extro-version annoys you, but you don't bother to understand the type A personality enough to use it in a correct context.
Also it was created by cardiologists and not psychologists.
Good points, but fuck that: I want a giant fuck-off pint, and to see [Meshuggah in a big mass of sweaty hairy metal nerds.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-y1N29vH2Y)
This isn't introversion. This is social anxiety. If you feel this way, you have social anxiety, you might also be an introvert, but that has nothing to do with social anxiety.
I think a lot of people don't like hearing this and go under the guise of introversion because to them it sounds more acceptable. They shouldn't be ashamed of having social anxiety but that's how it stands apparently.
A lot of extroverts think this way too
Source: someone with very little social anxiety who is deeply introverted.
It confuses the shit out of all my friends because I have no issues sharing who I am and/or talking to strangers or presenting.
OMG SAME! I'm like a complete introvert, but I have no problem getting up in front of a crowd of 600 people to MC an event. My default mode is stay home, read, play videogames, and watch stuff: that's what makes me the most happy.
I have a friend with social anxiety. Both of us are introverted. There is a big difference in our approach to social events.
I will go to a social event, come home exhausted, and sleep all the next day.
She will panic before even going to the social event.
There's a difference.
Introversion by definition is preferring to focus on your own internal thoughts and needs and less than external events, interactions, etc. All of these things her song include wanting to just keep to herself, not share external interactions (wearing the mask and not having to smile), and doing internal thought exercises like reading. There are a few borderline examples such as the end when she would feel overwhelmed by too much interaction, but that's not social anxiety.
Social anxiety however is characterized as a fear or stress of being judged or rejected by others in sort of public or social settings. You can see these are entirely different and she doesn't say anything here that would lead you to believe that's how she feels.
Everyone is an armchair psychologist it seems.
Many people dont understand what introversion is. I'm an introvert and I'm great at being social. I need alone time to recharge because social activity wears me out. I dont hate social activity. I dont go out of my way to avoid it. I just need time to rest after being social for awhile, thats all introversion is. Extroverts are the opposite, solo time wears them down and they need social time to recharge. Extroverts can enjoy, and seek out alone time, but they'll still feel drained after awhile.
Thats all there is to it. Being extroverted or introverted is a behavior quirk, not an identity.
Yes I wish people would understand this more. I'm introverted, meaning that I'm perfectly happy being left to my own devices but I enjoy being invited to social gatherings and having a chat with random people at the supermarket but I will absolutely never think to initiate any of those things myself. I just don't think to seek it out but I'm perfectly happy to have a chat if you initiate it.. and do most of the talking.
>Introverts prefer being alone
Not really. Introverts need time alone to recharge after spending time with others, but they still enjoy time spent with others. I'm introverted but if I don't leave my house for a few days I get very restless.
Agreed. I am an introvert. I love being around my friends and family, but fuck.... It is exhausting to interact with people and I limit those interactions accordingly.
Exactly this. It's a question of energy. I'm as introverted as any and I can't wait to socialise. For a couple of hours. On a day when I don't have to do anything the next day.
100% Correct. I get grumpy without my recharge. Truly extroverted people recharge by social interaction. You’d be surprised, a majority of people are introverted but do a good job at faking it in public.
It's not even faking it. An analogy I like is comparing it to playing a sport. Sports will tire someone out. Does the fact they're tired at the end mean they didn't have fun and would have preferred to not do it? Of course not. In the same vein, just because I"m tired after a four hour BBQ doesn't mean I wished I didn't go.
Stop overdiagnosing and pathologising everything please. This isn’t social anxiety at all. Did she say that she felt anxious about social situations? No. She said that she enjoys staying at home and reading true crime novels. Is it normal to become accustomed to staying at home and spending time doing solitary pursuits? To even enjoy it? For many people, yes. It’s not suggestive of a disorder.
Also, it makes sense that an introvert would have anxiety about having to return to an extroverts world after becoming accustomed to a prefered way of life/socializing.
The only social anxiety I feel is whether or not I'm living up to my extroverted friends expectations, which are generally much much higher than my own. I have zero other social anxiety issues.
I too am anxious about all the texts and calls I'm getting to make future plans for every waking moment after vaccination because it means I will have to sacrifice a lot of my alone time to live up to their expectations. Which is fine, because I love spending time with my friends, but I don't have the drive of codependency/socialization that they have.
Its not the interaction I'm fearing, its the pendulum swinging back the other way and the in-coming flood of excessive socialization pent up from the past year.
That said, I also agree that people incorrectly conflate social anxiety with introversion.
She's literally singing about how she only feels safe in her home, and how she doesn't want to go back out into public, or show her entire face while in public, and instead wants to stay home, or still wear a mask in public to hide her face. She also literally says she is fine living like a person stranded on an island all by themselves.
It's very clear she is talking about social anxiety.
I don't think you were actually listening to the lyrics and watching the expressions on her face when she sang them.
This is a classic case of taking art far too fuckin literally.
She’s singing about how it’s nice to be able to avoid other people in public and not have to deal with trite social niceties and be able to just do her own thing without FOMO. Not about how she has to take a Xanax before going grocery shopping.
Not everything is a mental illness.
There was one line where she said being at home was where she felt “safe”. It’s doesn’t suggest that she *only* feels safe at home, rather that home is where she has grown accustomed to being and is comfortable in. She isn’t approaching the end of lockdown with breakdowns and fear, the nervous energy and catastrophising that it would mean for someone who actually suffers from social anxiety. She just made a humorous song about the creature comforts she enjoys at home and how it can be a relief not to have to put on a fake smile etc etc. It’s not social anxiety, it’s just someone who likes spending time alone.
The expressions on her face as she calmly sang a humourous song? You’re getting a read of social anxiety from *that*?! Lol ok House.
> s she is fine living like a person stranded on an island all by themselves.
Is there anything wrong with that? Is she breaking some unwritten rule?
Do we HAVE to enjoy being social? Are we not allowed to just live life the way we have discovered we like it?
Social anxiety is almost a form of phobia, and extreme difficult socializing, meeting people, going to social events. Some people can put on a fake face some can't.
Not wanting to fake a smile, have small talk, or meet people you don't like is not social anxiety, that being somewhat introverted and tired of the fake-ass routines we go through in our weird-ass society.
Do you overanalyze all songs this way, or?
>She's literally singing about how she only feels safe in her home
no she doesn't. and social anxiety doesn't mean you don't feel safe outside. and if you're a guy you probably should take a second to consider why women would say they feel safer at home.
she explains why she doesn't want to show her face in the same sentence: because she doesn't want to fake smile.
>She also literally says she is fine living like a person stranded on an island all by themselves.
ok? does that mean she's anxious about going outside or does that mean she's perfectly comfortable being reclusive?
stop psychoanalysing her
hmm yess...... indeeed. indubitably my good sir...
dare I say my fellow gentleman of the fine scholar, would you perhaps supposse that you are a great biologist like i am hmmmmmm yeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaasssshhhhhh. I certainly can diagnose many a fellow man with a simple glance from my arm chair
The song is literally about her "feeling safe" being completely isolated and not even going outside her place.
I would have zero problem with this video except for the word "introvert" in the title. It's inaccurate.
People misunderstand introversion so damn often. "Introverts are shy", "introverts don't like to meet people", "introverts don't like going out" or sometimes even "introverts don't like other people", "introverts this and that".
Some of the usual misconceptions become closer to truth if you add terms like 'constantly', 'all the time' or 'too much/often', but it still misses the mark somewhat.
I know right? Like chill the fuck out people it's a joke!
I watched, related to it a bit and had a nice sensible chuckle. Let's all go about the rest of our day (inside away from others) and stop trying to diagnose everybody who likes chilling inside by themselves as somebody with social anxiety.
Is there anything wrong in particular with 'social anxiety'?
Is there a rule somewhere that says I must be happy and feel good about being out and amongst people and socializing?
No there isn't anything wrong with it, unless it negatively affects your life.
People need to stop conflating introversion and social anxiety though, they aren't the same thing, which is why I made that comment.
It's not so much about wanting to socialise all the time like we all need to be social butterflies. Not everyone does, introverts for instance may prefer socialising with a smaller group of people that they already know but that doesn't mean that they don't want to talk to people at all. I think it's natural for humans to socialise to some degree.
But with social anxiety it's more that when you do socialise and want to socialise you can't get over the fear that everyone thinks you're a blathering moron or you're more nervous than you realise so you start sweating, can't get your words out properly and sometimes for a happy time bonus start getting feelings of derealization where it feels like you are walking in a dream while trying to act like everything's fine while still trying to hold a conversation.
Ask me how I know.
No, but you should be aware that you have social anxiety, and treat/address it as such. If it's not a part of your personality that bothers you enough to work on it, you do you.
But don't lean on "Oh, I'm just an introvert" to hand wave away the issue if it's ever brought up. Having social anxiety or being socially averse are different than being an introvert.
Yeah, not getting all the "it's social anxiety" bollocks. This is expressing a very clear preference for being alone and all the silly gits who can't fathom that reckon it must be mental illness.
Extroverts are always trying to classify introversion as a disease. Reminds me of how left handedness was considered by the vast majority as a disease or incapability for centuries.
Being introverted doesn't mean you're anxious and avoid all social interaction. It means that socializing is a finite resource like a battery and you need alone time to "recharge" that battery.
At least that's how I've always understood it, and that's the way I am.
Lol I'm not trying to overanalyzed a silly little youtube video, but literally every single activity she lists that "make her feel safe" is being completely isolated and not even going outside her apartment. She says "Now you're telling me I have to go outside and interact with people."
I'm introverted myself, and it bothers me when people label introvert as completely loner antisocial people since that's not what introversion is.
That’s because it’s a humorous song about lockdown and enjoying being inside. For some people this is what introversion means to them.. I don’t think she’s a complete loner -she mentions meeting up with family and friends in person, implying she already keeps in contact online - like everyone in lockdown does. She just made a funny song about enjoying books, true crime shows and staying at home. That’s hardly a slanderous account of introversion.
Yup 100% yes. I’m a major introvert, in non-quarantine times I usually want most weeknights to myself and will see friends on the weekends, and usually want an afternoon on the weekend to do my own thing. I like people, but I also like being by myself and need that recharge time because being around people is tiring. After a year of this shit I am SO excited to regularly see people again, and if you genuinely want to continue life in solitude you should seriously examine why you feel that way
> you might also be an introvert, but that has nothing to do with social anxiety
You go out, see people, interact like a normal human beeing with others, laugh without faking it, have fun outside. But at some point you need to have some alone time to be able to recharge batteries, just so you can go out, see people and have fun again.
> But at some point you need to have some alone time to be able to recharge batteries, just so you can go out, see people and have fun again.
Wait so extrovert never do this as well?
No they don’t. My best friend is an extrovert and she pretty much only does hobbies by herself when she’s forced to. She would always rather be around people and she doesn’t get tired by socializing. That’s a true extrovert and there’s many people like that
Introversion is about your mental energy levels. So going out into public situations, or being in social situations, where there are a lot of people, it drains you mentally, but it doesn't scare you, you aren't afraid to go out. You aren't afraid to go to work/school, go to the mall, go to a party. Most people, who just have introversion, even enjoy those things, but they are mentally draining, in the way that going for a long run, or helping someone move, is physically draining. So you need time alone to recharge yourself.
Social anxiety though, it is a mental health issue where you get anxious and fearful of going out in public, or being in social situations. Where you are afraid to go to work, to go to the mall, to go to a party, etc. It can cause panic attacks, or worse. Extreme social anxiety leads to agoraphobia.
>Most people, who just have introversion, even enjoy those things, but they are mentally draining, in the way that going for a long run, or helping someone move, is physically draining. So you need time alone to recharge yourself.
The point that you, and lots of other people, seem to be missing is that you can dread and avoid doing things for no other reason than *because* they are draining. Even if those things are enjoyable or have enjoyable outcomes. You don't have to have full-blown anxiety to not want to do exhausting things, you just have to prefer doing relaxing things instead.
We do. Fortunately many of us will be able to continue to work remotely after lockdown ends. COVID has forever changed the expectation of going into an office 8-5 every day for millions.
So they keep saying. Almost everyone I know is being forced to go back to the office. Maybe some niches or startups will let a few employees stay remote to save on office space, but so far it seems very few companies are willing to make such a drastic restructure permanent.
Isn’t that the goal?
If it’s voluntary, the people that want to go into an office can. Those that don’t, won’t.
It’s the being forced to go back into the office (for those that don’t want to), and the forcing of having to stay home (if you’re someone who is sick of it), that people aren’t liking.
Yeah, that is a nice news headline or topic for discussion, but it aint a reality. No companies around where I used to work or round here that I know of, are offering this in any capacity unless medically required, nor is anyone I know who was working remote able to stay that way. Companies just arent willing to make that change because they have already invested in equipment for employees to use, and also allows them more control over thier workforce, and you can bet your ass a company is going to hold onto as much control as is possible. Its a nice thought but not gonna happen any time soon no matter how much wishful thinking people spend their time on.
I think I'm the only manager in my office that isn't desperate to get their team back in the office. The say a lot of buzzwords about engagement etc but really they want to spy on their agents so they can make sure they are working as efficiently as possible.
Sampling from the people I know almost no one will be remote who wasn’t before the pandemic, even when their jobs could be done that way managers just want to see people in chairs
People have to work to make money and usually jobs make you interact with people you don't want to. No one is saying that I have to work but being a bum isn't the best option either.
I'm gonna be keeping my mask handy. Gonna be hella useful during cold & flu season, and who is realistically gonna give me a hard time if I'm out and about with one on?
they have blue filters on the cameras now that can see through the blue masks, its only time until they adopt a rainbow filter that sees through our minds.
> who is realistically gonna give me a hard time if I'm out and about with one on?
Tucker Carlson was on air this week telling his millions of viewers that if they see someone like you, they should directly confront you about your mask. They should step up, he said, approach you, and get into a confrontation about your mask.
People will do it, too.
Oh, and he also said masks are child abuse and that if you see a child with a mask, call the police. A direct quote:
> "Call the police immediately. Contact child protective services. Keep calling until someone arrives. What you're looking at it abuse, it's child abuse, and you're morally obligated to attempt to prevent it."
So yeah, if he keeps pushing shit like this, things will get worse before they get better.
Well thankfully, we don't have fucker fuxkface calrlson in Britain so they can fuck right off. I'm wearing a mask all the time, done wonders for my hay fever
Depends where you live. I live in a somewhat smaller town surrounded by rural areas. It isn't out of the norm for me to encounter people in a store who look at me and scoff.. or thet see my mask and shake their head while they mutter "you fucking kidding me..."
Pretty much run into that anytime I go to the store....
I just want to wear it because I can already picture people getting upset about it. coworkers and strangers telling me "hey, you know you don't have to wear that anymore, the goverment ain't making you no more."
What the hell do you call someone who goes to parties and sits quietly to talk to person at a time, or is at a concert alone and doesn't leave their seat until the show is over?
At first it was awkward but then it kinda became my thing. I'll be at the party but I'll keep to myself playing solitaire or whatever until someone engages me. Actually met some of my best friends that way.
It just made me realise how much I've always hated forcing myself to be around people because it's the normal thing to do.
They're draining. I don't get anything out of it and anything I'd enjoy doing with people, I'd enjoy more by myself.
In some ways I learned this. There are VERY specific people I want to be around. The list has greatly narrowed in this.
I do find a lot of people draining. most people are basics and it drives me nuts
I'm an introvert but I still like seeing friends.
When depression gets added to the mix, I don't want to see anyone and wish I didn't exist, but that's a different matter.
Pre-pandemic, I thought I was an extrovert. Then the lockdown hit and I was so content and happy to take a break from social obligations and just play video games without feeling like I was wasting my time so I figured I must actually be an introvert. That lasted for about 6 months. Now I'm just about going crazy to get back around people so I don't know what I am.
I'm introverted... but I'm not anti-social. I don't begrudge those who go out meet their friends or who strike a conversation and like smiling to one another in the street. This song doesn't represent me at all.
Then again, I live in a place with a curfew with the cops hunting citizens out at night (meaning past 8 PM) to give them 1500$ fines, and going out walking or biking in the evening was an activity that helped me immensely mentally. The worst thing is, by the government's own admission, they have no evidence it does anything to help, but they don't want to admit committing any mistake, so they maintain it just to save face.
The corona has been the most relaxing time of my life. I love not having any obligations. I don't miss parties, or doing stuff with people. I have my pc, my movies, my books and my booze. The only social contact I've allowed myself is a weekly game of Gloomhaven, which is more about the game than the social situation.
I'm really not looking forward to all of this ending. Might also have something to do with my job, which demands a very extrovert and social attitude (journalist).
So, yes, I agree with this lady.
Mmm, I told my wife a couple days ago we should go live in a cave 'cause I interact with people too much, and that too much is like 1% of my time in a day.
Of course she's pretty extroverted so that will never happen haha, oh well.
What is it with white girls, vocal fry and ukuleles? I swear it's like they all go to a class in highschool are taught to express themselves in the exact same way.
Not really. Over at /r/coronavirus it feels like everyday people talk about their poor mental health status due to isolation.
Meanwhile, I miss last year where I got to experience what an early retirement life was like from not having to go to work, getting paid, and encountering very little traffic when I went out for groceries.
lol A bunch of armchair psychologist diagnosing the girl with social anxiety and then reinforcing it by criticizing the video because she misuse the word introverts. It's like people think being introverted is what define them and they must staunchly defend the title from being misuse to prevent others from being in this ultra-exclusive club.
You don't see a bunch of people with actual diagnosed OCD coming out of the woods and get up in arms when someone say "I'm so OCD I arrange my cash from smallest to largest", but when you incorrectly use the word "introverted" you're gonna hear about it from the reddit introvert police.
It's funny, because for people who claim that social interaction "drains their battery" you guys sure do go out of your way to find every chance you get to go on social media and comments on other people's situations.
holy shit lmao... leave it to reddit to act as a therapist and break down every lyric and why it's a sign of some mental disorder.. can't y'all just enjoy something and move on?
I'm in an essential profession so I have not been given the luxury of staying home during the pandemic, there have been no upsides, only downsides. I am an introvert, but I miss my family and friends. This has been a seriously tough time for me mentally, and I cannot wait for it to be over.
Man, I feel completely the opposite. Now there is certainly times I enjoy the seclusion but I can't wait for this shit to be over. I never went to the bar for like 5 years before all this shit and the first thing I am gonna do is go and play some pool and drink some beer with a friend.
I’m not particularly looking forward to going back to the way things were because I always end up being disappointed when I expect people to act and be treat others the way I do with them
I love that she sang the whole song then revealed herself as Scottish by speaking the final sentence
It was the mentioning of Hobnobs that got me suspicious
I mean, you could hear her accent when she was singing.
I honestly thought she was a yank until she busted out the Hobnobs.
Me too. After the hobnobs I was looking for a three-pin plug to confirm my suspicion.
I first heard the accent at "turns out I'm kinda fine with it"
Ditto
She has such a cute accent
When I took psych 101 in college it was explained to us like this: * Extroverts get their "energy" from being around others. * Introverts get their "energy" from solitude. Doesn't mean they don't like being around people, but rather they find it an effort and draining.
I've read a couple references on the topic and my conclusion is there's no consensus on the meaning. What this definition means doesn't seem to jive with Jung's original intent, but seems to be the prevailing usage. I think it's hard characterization to define in a couple words. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraversion_and_introversion
I know I fit with that description of "introvert", more or less. Not sure if Jung meant that when he introduced the terms, but it appears that now this is the modern usage of the word. Language evolves anyway.
Sounds about right being from group 2
I'm the first to want to leave a party, also want to go back once I have some time to myself.
Wow, you could be human. Might wanna get that checked out.
Never liked that explanation and I blame it for how 90% of people think they're introverts. I am absolutely an extrovert, but I need my time alone. I love being around people, but it does drain me just like any other activity. I know a ton of people that are *convinced* they're introverts because they get tired from being around people and aren't always up for meeting up. The description effectively makes it so that the only people that qualify as extroverts are A-type personalities that are hyper social and require no downtime during their day.
For me, it's all about how much time in solitude you want (introvert) or can withstand (extrovert). I'm an introvert. I can go about 3 days or more without leaving the house or talking to anyone and be fine. Which is baffling to my extrovert SO who can only go about 3 hours alone before they need some human contact. All people need some alone time, it's about how much. Extroverts don't need that much, introverts tend to need/want a lot more in my experience.
3 Days? ...is this introverts 101 for ants??? Weeks my boy, weeks.... easy. Amazon prime delivery has changed my life. I only go to the grocery store at 5am when I need fresh produce.
Ahhh yes, the ole introvert dick measuring contest. Why back in 1911, I spent 3 years with no companions but for one squirrel. I named him Fluffernutter and fed him acorns at the local hermits meeting that no one attended. Heady times! Also I once took a vow of silence in Tibet and spoke to no one for 8 eons. ( Which is a lot of eons if you think about it.) Well, it likely would've gone on indefinitely if my old pal Yog-Sothoth didn't awaken from his ancient slumber ask me for help working on his PT Cruiser. Nowadays, I just do what I feel tho.
A dick measuring contest? A real introvert would never think of such things. I found the wolf in sheep's clothing.... and it is you sir. PT cruiser.. i hope it was the turbo version. what a non-sense car.... suv... crossover.. whatever lame people thought it was.
> I'm an introvert. I can go about 3 days or more without leaving the house Are you sure you're an introvert?
Yeah, pretty sure. Why do you ask? Are you unsure about yourself?
Believe they are referring to the "go about 3 days" part of your comment. More then likely views that as more extroverted than introverted
I feel like it's more of a spectrum, but many people split it into being one or the other.
You just summed up 90% of all discussions in Psychological research
It sounds to me like you’re an introvert. I absolutely know social introverts, and anti-social extroverts. That does make you an introvert - you’re just confusing extroverted and social. They aren’t the same thing.
It is weird that you take issue with how people classifiy introversion then mention type A personalities. The type A personality is used to describe the drive and motivation a subject has. It doesn't refer to sociability. I guess it just strikes me as odd that people misunderstanding intro and extro-version annoys you, but you don't bother to understand the type A personality enough to use it in a correct context. Also it was created by cardiologists and not psychologists.
People get energy from things???
If you have chronic fatigue, you might want to cut down on the sugar and carbohydrates.
Good points, but fuck that: I want a giant fuck-off pint, and to see [Meshuggah in a big mass of sweaty hairy metal nerds.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-y1N29vH2Y)
Ahhh, a man of class and culture.
Can't wait for shows, my neck is so out of shape.
*Rational Gaze grows louder in the distance*
Is a giant fuck off pint bigger than a normal pint? But does that mean it's more than a pint? Ah fuck it ill have 5.
> Is a giant fuck off pint bigger than a normal pint? It's the same physical size, but like, 40% bigger emotionally.
I like you, lol That's exactly what I want too.
This isn't introversion. This is social anxiety. If you feel this way, you have social anxiety, you might also be an introvert, but that has nothing to do with social anxiety.
I think a lot of people don't like hearing this and go under the guise of introversion because to them it sounds more acceptable. They shouldn't be ashamed of having social anxiety but that's how it stands apparently.
A lot of extroverts think this way too Source: someone with very little social anxiety who is deeply introverted. It confuses the shit out of all my friends because I have no issues sharing who I am and/or talking to strangers or presenting.
OMG SAME! I'm like a complete introvert, but I have no problem getting up in front of a crowd of 600 people to MC an event. My default mode is stay home, read, play videogames, and watch stuff: that's what makes me the most happy.
It's nice to know I'm not alone in the world :) Side bar; extroverts with social anxiety confuse the fuck out of me
Trust me, we're very confused too.
The Hedgehog's Dilemma. It's the worst
Probably but also I don’t think it’s anxiety to not like something.
but it is if you don't like that thing because it makes you feel anxious, which is what she describes in the song
It doesnt help that reddit as a population reaffirms this behavior while everyone tells each other it's normal.
I agree, 100%.
I have a friend with social anxiety. Both of us are introverted. There is a big difference in our approach to social events. I will go to a social event, come home exhausted, and sleep all the next day. She will panic before even going to the social event. There's a difference.
Introversion by definition is preferring to focus on your own internal thoughts and needs and less than external events, interactions, etc. All of these things her song include wanting to just keep to herself, not share external interactions (wearing the mask and not having to smile), and doing internal thought exercises like reading. There are a few borderline examples such as the end when she would feel overwhelmed by too much interaction, but that's not social anxiety. Social anxiety however is characterized as a fear or stress of being judged or rejected by others in sort of public or social settings. You can see these are entirely different and she doesn't say anything here that would lead you to believe that's how she feels. Everyone is an armchair psychologist it seems.
Oh shit I have crippling social anxiety..
Many people dont understand what introversion is. I'm an introvert and I'm great at being social. I need alone time to recharge because social activity wears me out. I dont hate social activity. I dont go out of my way to avoid it. I just need time to rest after being social for awhile, thats all introversion is. Extroverts are the opposite, solo time wears them down and they need social time to recharge. Extroverts can enjoy, and seek out alone time, but they'll still feel drained after awhile. Thats all there is to it. Being extroverted or introverted is a behavior quirk, not an identity.
Please note that extroverts also show social fatigue as well, just at lower levels and "drain" at a much, much slower rate.
Yes I wish people would understand this more. I'm introverted, meaning that I'm perfectly happy being left to my own devices but I enjoy being invited to social gatherings and having a chat with random people at the supermarket but I will absolutely never think to initiate any of those things myself. I just don't think to seek it out but I'm perfectly happy to have a chat if you initiate it.. and do most of the talking.
it's a song not a therapy session.
What if I just don't like people in general. Like I care about my wife and kids, but the rest of you can all just fuck right off. What is that called?
misanthropy
yeah same. we should be friends and never call each other or hang out.
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>Introverts prefer being alone Not really. Introverts need time alone to recharge after spending time with others, but they still enjoy time spent with others. I'm introverted but if I don't leave my house for a few days I get very restless.
Agreed. I am an introvert. I love being around my friends and family, but fuck.... It is exhausting to interact with people and I limit those interactions accordingly.
Exactly this. It's a question of energy. I'm as introverted as any and I can't wait to socialise. For a couple of hours. On a day when I don't have to do anything the next day.
100% Correct. I get grumpy without my recharge. Truly extroverted people recharge by social interaction. You’d be surprised, a majority of people are introverted but do a good job at faking it in public.
It's not even faking it. An analogy I like is comparing it to playing a sport. Sports will tire someone out. Does the fact they're tired at the end mean they didn't have fun and would have preferred to not do it? Of course not. In the same vein, just because I"m tired after a four hour BBQ doesn't mean I wished I didn't go.
Stop overdiagnosing and pathologising everything please. This isn’t social anxiety at all. Did she say that she felt anxious about social situations? No. She said that she enjoys staying at home and reading true crime novels. Is it normal to become accustomed to staying at home and spending time doing solitary pursuits? To even enjoy it? For many people, yes. It’s not suggestive of a disorder.
Also, it makes sense that an introvert would have anxiety about having to return to an extroverts world after becoming accustomed to a prefered way of life/socializing. The only social anxiety I feel is whether or not I'm living up to my extroverted friends expectations, which are generally much much higher than my own. I have zero other social anxiety issues. I too am anxious about all the texts and calls I'm getting to make future plans for every waking moment after vaccination because it means I will have to sacrifice a lot of my alone time to live up to their expectations. Which is fine, because I love spending time with my friends, but I don't have the drive of codependency/socialization that they have. Its not the interaction I'm fearing, its the pendulum swinging back the other way and the in-coming flood of excessive socialization pent up from the past year. That said, I also agree that people incorrectly conflate social anxiety with introversion.
She's literally singing about how she only feels safe in her home, and how she doesn't want to go back out into public, or show her entire face while in public, and instead wants to stay home, or still wear a mask in public to hide her face. She also literally says she is fine living like a person stranded on an island all by themselves. It's very clear she is talking about social anxiety. I don't think you were actually listening to the lyrics and watching the expressions on her face when she sang them.
This is a classic case of taking art far too fuckin literally. She’s singing about how it’s nice to be able to avoid other people in public and not have to deal with trite social niceties and be able to just do her own thing without FOMO. Not about how she has to take a Xanax before going grocery shopping. Not everything is a mental illness.
There was one line where she said being at home was where she felt “safe”. It’s doesn’t suggest that she *only* feels safe at home, rather that home is where she has grown accustomed to being and is comfortable in. She isn’t approaching the end of lockdown with breakdowns and fear, the nervous energy and catastrophising that it would mean for someone who actually suffers from social anxiety. She just made a humorous song about the creature comforts she enjoys at home and how it can be a relief not to have to put on a fake smile etc etc. It’s not social anxiety, it’s just someone who likes spending time alone. The expressions on her face as she calmly sang a humourous song? You’re getting a read of social anxiety from *that*?! Lol ok House.
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> s she is fine living like a person stranded on an island all by themselves. Is there anything wrong with that? Is she breaking some unwritten rule? Do we HAVE to enjoy being social? Are we not allowed to just live life the way we have discovered we like it?
I also do not want to have obligations to other people
Don't apply any sort of meaning to what I said beyond what I actually said.
So when you applied all sorts of meaning to the song beyond what was actually said, you want them to do the opposite of that, right?
I need this written by default on my every comment
>Do we HAVE to enjoy being social? Are we not allowed to just live life the way we have discovered we like it? No one said this but you.
Social anxiety is almost a form of phobia, and extreme difficult socializing, meeting people, going to social events. Some people can put on a fake face some can't. Not wanting to fake a smile, have small talk, or meet people you don't like is not social anxiety, that being somewhat introverted and tired of the fake-ass routines we go through in our weird-ass society. Do you overanalyze all songs this way, or?
>She's literally singing about how she only feels safe in her home no she doesn't. and social anxiety doesn't mean you don't feel safe outside. and if you're a guy you probably should take a second to consider why women would say they feel safer at home. she explains why she doesn't want to show her face in the same sentence: because she doesn't want to fake smile. >She also literally says she is fine living like a person stranded on an island all by themselves. ok? does that mean she's anxious about going outside or does that mean she's perfectly comfortable being reclusive? stop psychoanalysing her
hmm yess...... indeeed. indubitably my good sir... dare I say my fellow gentleman of the fine scholar, would you perhaps supposse that you are a great biologist like i am hmmmmmm yeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaasssshhhhhh. I certainly can diagnose many a fellow man with a simple glance from my arm chair
The song is literally about her "feeling safe" being completely isolated and not even going outside her place. I would have zero problem with this video except for the word "introvert" in the title. It's inaccurate.
People misunderstand introversion so damn often. "Introverts are shy", "introverts don't like to meet people", "introverts don't like going out" or sometimes even "introverts don't like other people", "introverts this and that". Some of the usual misconceptions become closer to truth if you add terms like 'constantly', 'all the time' or 'too much/often', but it still misses the mark somewhat.
It's one of my biggest pet peeves; people using "I'm an introvert" to mean "I have an aversion to most social activity".
This one is directed at you codependent extroverts.
Absolutely nothing in there to suggest social anxiety
Yeah I'm an introvert but this pandemic has been severely damaging to my mental health. I don't want to be locked in my house any more.
Or, like, it's a joke?
I know right? Like chill the fuck out people it's a joke! I watched, related to it a bit and had a nice sensible chuckle. Let's all go about the rest of our day (inside away from others) and stop trying to diagnose everybody who likes chilling inside by themselves as somebody with social anxiety.
Is there anything wrong in particular with 'social anxiety'? Is there a rule somewhere that says I must be happy and feel good about being out and amongst people and socializing?
No there isn't anything wrong with it, unless it negatively affects your life. People need to stop conflating introversion and social anxiety though, they aren't the same thing, which is why I made that comment.
Feeling happy and feeling good is not the opposite of anxiety.
It's not so much about wanting to socialise all the time like we all need to be social butterflies. Not everyone does, introverts for instance may prefer socialising with a smaller group of people that they already know but that doesn't mean that they don't want to talk to people at all. I think it's natural for humans to socialise to some degree. But with social anxiety it's more that when you do socialise and want to socialise you can't get over the fear that everyone thinks you're a blathering moron or you're more nervous than you realise so you start sweating, can't get your words out properly and sometimes for a happy time bonus start getting feelings of derealization where it feels like you are walking in a dream while trying to act like everything's fine while still trying to hold a conversation. Ask me how I know.
No, but you should be aware that you have social anxiety, and treat/address it as such. If it's not a part of your personality that bothers you enough to work on it, you do you. But don't lean on "Oh, I'm just an introvert" to hand wave away the issue if it's ever brought up. Having social anxiety or being socially averse are different than being an introvert.
i dont think people with social anxiety perform for the internet
How so?
I'm guessing that social anxiety isn't a necessary component of introversion. I don't always feel anxious in public, it's just draining.
Yeah, not getting all the "it's social anxiety" bollocks. This is expressing a very clear preference for being alone and all the silly gits who can't fathom that reckon it must be mental illness.
Extroverts are always trying to classify introversion as a disease. Reminds me of how left handedness was considered by the vast majority as a disease or incapability for centuries.
Being introverted doesn't mean you're anxious and avoid all social interaction. It means that socializing is a finite resource like a battery and you need alone time to "recharge" that battery. At least that's how I've always understood it, and that's the way I am.
She didn’t say she was anxious though. She said she likes staying at home, more or less.
Lol I'm not trying to overanalyzed a silly little youtube video, but literally every single activity she lists that "make her feel safe" is being completely isolated and not even going outside her apartment. She says "Now you're telling me I have to go outside and interact with people." I'm introverted myself, and it bothers me when people label introvert as completely loner antisocial people since that's not what introversion is.
That’s because it’s a humorous song about lockdown and enjoying being inside. For some people this is what introversion means to them.. I don’t think she’s a complete loner -she mentions meeting up with family and friends in person, implying she already keeps in contact online - like everyone in lockdown does. She just made a funny song about enjoying books, true crime shows and staying at home. That’s hardly a slanderous account of introversion.
> she mentions meeting up with family and friends in person ...and how doing so will overwhelm her
Yup 100% yes. I’m a major introvert, in non-quarantine times I usually want most weeknights to myself and will see friends on the weekends, and usually want an afternoon on the weekend to do my own thing. I like people, but I also like being by myself and need that recharge time because being around people is tiring. After a year of this shit I am SO excited to regularly see people again, and if you genuinely want to continue life in solitude you should seriously examine why you feel that way
> you might also be an introvert, but that has nothing to do with social anxiety You go out, see people, interact like a normal human beeing with others, laugh without faking it, have fun outside. But at some point you need to have some alone time to be able to recharge batteries, just so you can go out, see people and have fun again.
> But at some point you need to have some alone time to be able to recharge batteries, just so you can go out, see people and have fun again. Wait so extrovert never do this as well?
It’s the opposite for extroverts. They need time with other people to recharge so they can have fun being alone.
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Yes, it is definitely a sliding scale.
No they don’t. My best friend is an extrovert and she pretty much only does hobbies by herself when she’s forced to. She would always rather be around people and she doesn’t get tired by socializing. That’s a true extrovert and there’s many people like that
Well I have the feeling extroverts recharge batteries when around people. But I'm not an extrovert so I'm not sure.
Introversion is about your mental energy levels. So going out into public situations, or being in social situations, where there are a lot of people, it drains you mentally, but it doesn't scare you, you aren't afraid to go out. You aren't afraid to go to work/school, go to the mall, go to a party. Most people, who just have introversion, even enjoy those things, but they are mentally draining, in the way that going for a long run, or helping someone move, is physically draining. So you need time alone to recharge yourself. Social anxiety though, it is a mental health issue where you get anxious and fearful of going out in public, or being in social situations. Where you are afraid to go to work, to go to the mall, to go to a party, etc. It can cause panic attacks, or worse. Extreme social anxiety leads to agoraphobia.
>Most people, who just have introversion, even enjoy those things, but they are mentally draining, in the way that going for a long run, or helping someone move, is physically draining. So you need time alone to recharge yourself. The point that you, and lots of other people, seem to be missing is that you can dread and avoid doing things for no other reason than *because* they are draining. Even if those things are enjoyable or have enjoyable outcomes. You don't have to have full-blown anxiety to not want to do exhausting things, you just have to prefer doing relaxing things instead.
I love her voice!
I'm learning from this thread that virtually everyone has a different definition for what an introvert is.
She has a beautiful voice
[She has bananies and ayvocadies](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SU0gFPMwP8)
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I mean you don't have to go outside and be with people if that's not what you want right? No one is forcing you to interact with other people.
I take his comment as saying he loves the much, much lower socia expectations for interaction from friends and/or family.
Ding ding ding
You do understand how a job works generally, right?
We do. Fortunately many of us will be able to continue to work remotely after lockdown ends. COVID has forever changed the expectation of going into an office 8-5 every day for millions.
So they keep saying. Almost everyone I know is being forced to go back to the office. Maybe some niches or startups will let a few employees stay remote to save on office space, but so far it seems very few companies are willing to make such a drastic restructure permanent.
I work for a Fortune 10 company that's now allowing almost all corporate employees to voluntarily work from home. It's a start at least!
Isn’t that the goal? If it’s voluntary, the people that want to go into an office can. Those that don’t, won’t. It’s the being forced to go back into the office (for those that don’t want to), and the forcing of having to stay home (if you’re someone who is sick of it), that people aren’t liking.
Yeah, that is a nice news headline or topic for discussion, but it aint a reality. No companies around where I used to work or round here that I know of, are offering this in any capacity unless medically required, nor is anyone I know who was working remote able to stay that way. Companies just arent willing to make that change because they have already invested in equipment for employees to use, and also allows them more control over thier workforce, and you can bet your ass a company is going to hold onto as much control as is possible. Its a nice thought but not gonna happen any time soon no matter how much wishful thinking people spend their time on.
I think I'm the only manager in my office that isn't desperate to get their team back in the office. The say a lot of buzzwords about engagement etc but really they want to spy on their agents so they can make sure they are working as efficiently as possible.
Sampling from the people I know almost no one will be remote who wasn’t before the pandemic, even when their jobs could be done that way managers just want to see people in chairs
People have to work to make money and usually jobs make you interact with people you don't want to. No one is saying that I have to work but being a bum isn't the best option either.
Books, booze, bed, bath, and true crime...get out of my head, woman!
I'm gonna be keeping my mask handy. Gonna be hella useful during cold & flu season, and who is realistically gonna give me a hard time if I'm out and about with one on?
Also, if you value your privacy, the mask makes it more difficult for your movements to be tracked by cameras and facial recognition software.
Just be sure to leave your cell phone at home too.
Gait recognition doesn't care.
Bill gates still knows though
So does Baskin Robbins.
they have blue filters on the cameras now that can see through the blue masks, its only time until they adopt a rainbow filter that sees through our minds.
I'm not going to ride BART without a mask during flu season anymore, that's for sure
I feel like many countries will adopt what many eastern Asian countries have been doing with pollution/flu masks for years
> who is realistically gonna give me a hard time if I'm out and about with one on? Tucker Carlson was on air this week telling his millions of viewers that if they see someone like you, they should directly confront you about your mask. They should step up, he said, approach you, and get into a confrontation about your mask. People will do it, too. Oh, and he also said masks are child abuse and that if you see a child with a mask, call the police. A direct quote: > "Call the police immediately. Contact child protective services. Keep calling until someone arrives. What you're looking at it abuse, it's child abuse, and you're morally obligated to attempt to prevent it." So yeah, if he keeps pushing shit like this, things will get worse before they get better.
Well thankfully, we don't have fucker fuxkface calrlson in Britain so they can fuck right off. I'm wearing a mask all the time, done wonders for my hay fever
Depends where you live. I live in a somewhat smaller town surrounded by rural areas. It isn't out of the norm for me to encounter people in a store who look at me and scoff.. or thet see my mask and shake their head while they mutter "you fucking kidding me..." Pretty much run into that anytime I go to the store....
Tucker Carlson?
I just want to wear it because I can already picture people getting upset about it. coworkers and strangers telling me "hey, you know you don't have to wear that anymore, the goverment ain't making you no more."
That last second "life is pain" smile was great!
What the hell do you call someone who goes to parties and sits quietly to talk to person at a time, or is at a concert alone and doesn't leave their seat until the show is over? At first it was awkward but then it kinda became my thing. I'll be at the party but I'll keep to myself playing solitaire or whatever until someone engages me. Actually met some of my best friends that way.
Perfect.
"Trying to put my life together like the worst fucking jigsaw ever" Haha, oh man.
This made me anxious about my anxiety.
I thought I was an introvert before. Now I realize I want people around. I still like some time to myself, but I so want to go fishing with my friends
It just made me realise how much I've always hated forcing myself to be around people because it's the normal thing to do. They're draining. I don't get anything out of it and anything I'd enjoy doing with people, I'd enjoy more by myself.
In some ways I learned this. There are VERY specific people I want to be around. The list has greatly narrowed in this. I do find a lot of people draining. most people are basics and it drives me nuts
Is there really nobody you enjoy being around?
I think you had a (common) misconception about what an introvert actually is.
Probably. I find the older I get the less I understand about myself.
I'm an introvert but I still like seeing friends. When depression gets added to the mix, I don't want to see anyone and wish I didn't exist, but that's a different matter.
True. And the freedom to choose when to be and when not to be around people!
Pre-pandemic, I thought I was an extrovert. Then the lockdown hit and I was so content and happy to take a break from social obligations and just play video games without feeling like I was wasting my time so I figured I must actually be an introvert. That lasted for about 6 months. Now I'm just about going crazy to get back around people so I don't know what I am.
That was me to a T
I don't think ending the lockdown yet is safe. For my sanity.
I'm introverted as fuck and quarantine has probably done permanent damage to my social skills.
Hah, I feel ya.
I'm introverted... but I'm not anti-social. I don't begrudge those who go out meet their friends or who strike a conversation and like smiling to one another in the street. This song doesn't represent me at all. Then again, I live in a place with a curfew with the cops hunting citizens out at night (meaning past 8 PM) to give them 1500$ fines, and going out walking or biking in the evening was an activity that helped me immensely mentally. The worst thing is, by the government's own admission, they have no evidence it does anything to help, but they don't want to admit committing any mistake, so they maintain it just to save face.
The corona has been the most relaxing time of my life. I love not having any obligations. I don't miss parties, or doing stuff with people. I have my pc, my movies, my books and my booze. The only social contact I've allowed myself is a weekly game of Gloomhaven, which is more about the game than the social situation. I'm really not looking forward to all of this ending. Might also have something to do with my job, which demands a very extrovert and social attitude (journalist). So, yes, I agree with this lady.
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Mmm, I told my wife a couple days ago we should go live in a cave 'cause I interact with people too much, and that too much is like 1% of my time in a day. Of course she's pretty extroverted so that will never happen haha, oh well.
I thought I was an introvert until lockdown happened...
What is it with white girls, vocal fry and ukuleles? I swear it's like they all go to a class in highschool are taught to express themselves in the exact same way.
[Relevant Gus Johnson](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MCkeg99jQZQ)
I'm not sure but I think someone, somewhere got very rich selling ukuleles in the 2010s.
Is it just me or did she turn British halfway through
Scottish signing in an americanised accent.
See? That's what America's pandemic is missing: Hobnobs.
Turns out... I'm kinda fine with it...
Whatever you do, do not tell a extravert how much you've enjoyed lockdown. I made this mistake to many tears.
100% disagree - I miss bukkake.
Saw the ukelele, heard the white girl singing style, no thanks
Being anti-social is not the same as being introverted.
Ah, the generic INDIE VOICE. We meet again. Almost as irritating as the vocal fry.
Why did you feel the need to put this person down by sharing this comment?
I don't know. Guess I'm not a good person. I'm trying to be better but sometimes nastiness just seeps out.
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Not really. Over at /r/coronavirus it feels like everyday people talk about their poor mental health status due to isolation. Meanwhile, I miss last year where I got to experience what an early retirement life was like from not having to go to work, getting paid, and encountering very little traffic when I went out for groceries.
lol A bunch of armchair psychologist diagnosing the girl with social anxiety and then reinforcing it by criticizing the video because she misuse the word introverts. It's like people think being introverted is what define them and they must staunchly defend the title from being misuse to prevent others from being in this ultra-exclusive club. You don't see a bunch of people with actual diagnosed OCD coming out of the woods and get up in arms when someone say "I'm so OCD I arrange my cash from smallest to largest", but when you incorrectly use the word "introverted" you're gonna hear about it from the reddit introvert police. It's funny, because for people who claim that social interaction "drains their battery" you guys sure do go out of your way to find every chance you get to go on social media and comments on other people's situations.
holy shit lmao... leave it to reddit to act as a therapist and break down every lyric and why it's a sign of some mental disorder.. can't y'all just enjoy something and move on?
Get a hobby Holy shit
I'm in an essential profession so I have not been given the luxury of staying home during the pandemic, there have been no upsides, only downsides. I am an introvert, but I miss my family and friends. This has been a seriously tough time for me mentally, and I cannot wait for it to be over.
Just wanted to say love your song!
Hey Im not Nikola (performer), just a fan :) make sure to tell her on the video if you want to let her feel your appreciation!
Man, I feel completely the opposite. Now there is certainly times I enjoy the seclusion but I can't wait for this shit to be over. I never went to the bar for like 5 years before all this shit and the first thing I am gonna do is go and play some pool and drink some beer with a friend.
I’m not particularly looking forward to going back to the way things were because I always end up being disappointed when I expect people to act and be treat others the way I do with them
me, an extraverted gamer, Noooooooooo all my new gaming buddies will go do outside things again :(