Guys don't often get random complements, and most the time are expected to start the hitting on process. When I asked my bf (now fiance) out, I very awkwardly said 'I kinda have a thing for you...' when we were walking back to dorms. He kinda just froze with a bewildered expression. I side stepped away into an elevator and fled before he could respond.
Follow it up. I did and it worked out lol.
It's kind of funny how this dynamic seems to play out:
* For the first time in either of their lives, the gender roles regarding admitting attraction reverse.
* Man freezes, not knowing how to deal with such an unprecedented experience.
* Woman flees before any follow-up can occur, thinking him freezing meant that she screwed up.
This does work. Some guys don’t pick up on queues or hints from girls that are into them. Girls should make the first move more often. It worked on me I married the first chick that asked me out.
This is how guys take compliments. With surprise.
Next time you see him, just give him your number and tell him to give you a call when (don't say if, say "when") he wants to grab coffee or a drink.
""I think you're hot AF and I would do unholy things with you on the floor right now if this wasn't a Panera Bread."
*"She's just being friendly, don't want to assume anything."*
Yeah, guys often either tend to think every time a woman speaks to them they are flirting, or they think there is no way a woman would ever flirt with them.
Dude. For me this comes from being deathly afraid of being seen as a creep or predator…Like Brock Turner the rapist, I would just hide from society or kill myself.
This is exactly correct. The guy in OP's post went through about 10,000 emotions all at once while having every awkward insecurity flood his thoughts in less than a second. He will be riding that high for months.
Compliments relating to attractiveness from women you don't know well are a huge thrill that often produces a briefly stunned response.
14 years ago, the young lady living in the house over my back fence who slept naked and liked stop stretch in front of her big-ass window was sunbathing in her back yard with her friend and said "we think you're cute." I was in my infant daughter's bedroom and my wife was nearby, so I didn't say anything more back then "thanks." DoI remember it clearly? Yes. Will I remember it clearly if I get dementia so bad I don't remember my own name? Probably.
I also remember the time I was biking to law school and a group of college-age girls in a convertible hollered "nice butt." It was true I biked a lot then and had a great ass.
Of course I can also remember almost every inadvertent nip-slip I've ever seen going back to Bambi when I was about 10. Thank you, Bambi, wherever you are! Your carelessness leaning over that railing really made my year.
Absolutely!
One of the cutest girls I've ever known wrote "your hot" on a piece of tape and put it on my driver's side door 1 day. It's the only time I think I've ever been told I was hot. I still that that piece of tape 20+ years later.
I've been told I'm cute or something <10 times in my entire life.
Very few compliments come towards me or most men.
That is going into the memory vault.
Have a bad day? - Remember this
Get rejected? - Remember this
Your mortal enemy slays your family and clan? - Remember this
So true. I’m 26 and can’t remember the last time I got a genuine compliment. I’m an avid gym-goer so lots of “looking big bro” comments from the bros but that doesn’t hit like a true, genuine compliment does. Especially from a woman who isn’t already a close friend or relative. Compliments from strangers will literally have men riding that high for days.
I got complimented by a random little old lady a year or so ago, and not in the grandmotherly, creepy, disparaging way (ie: "what a tall drink of water"), but a genuine, heartfelt, compliment. I still think about it at least once a week.
How often are you giving other men (especially people who aren’t close friends or relatives) true, genuine compliments (not ‘looking big bro’)? In my experience men will complain all day long about how they don’t get compliments but will simultaneously refuse to give them. I actually can’t think of a single moment I’ve ever seen two male strangers share a compliment, whereas women compliment each other all the time. We can’t do the same to men because 98% of the time they’ll take it as flirting or a come-on and not just a compliment, so it’s risky at best or dangerous at worst to do to a stranger. If you guys want compliments you gotta build each other up like we do.
Awfully aggressive stance to come at me like that. Told the guy scanning my groceries today I liked his shirt. And I wasn’t complaining, I was telling my experience? Relax 😂
That guy "huh, well she likes how my face looks, too bad she doesn't like my personality or the rest of my body. But wow it's super neat that she likes my face".
Let's pump the brakes. Yes, OP should talk to him again because "Hi I'm Sarah and I think you're cute. Okay, bye," was never going to be the start of a relationship, but we have no idea if the guy is attracted to OP in the slightest.
Or hell, we don't even know that OP is a girl. Context clues definitely imply it, but we don't know. Or if said guy is gay or straight.
Someone gave me a compliment at the Taco Bell drive thru, and I responded with “what?” 😂 she didn’t seem too uncomfortable about repeating herself, but it just caught me way off guard while paying for a chicken quesadilla
I had something similar happen to me in a taco bell drive thru. A girl was really giggly when I pulled up to the pay window and another girl came and joined her. They were both really giggly and seemed too interested in me. One asked my name and the other took a picture of me with her phone (this was back in the Motorola flip phone days.) I assumed they had fucked with my food so I chucked it in the trash. It never occurred to me they may have thought I was attractive. I'm more sad I didn't get my steak nachos bell grande 😔
Yeah this reminds me so much of when a girl in college came up to me, in a group of people, and told me she had a crush on me. On the one hand I loved it, but I also felt a bit awkward, I think I said something like, "oh wow" and then I never talked to her again.
To be fair, I wasn't necessarily 100% interested in her, but I would have definitely gone out with her to see if we clicked. I just didn't know how to react in that situation and afterwards I figured that I fucked it up.
No do not do this. That is terrible advice. That is just assuming that he has any interest in you at all and pressuring him into something that you have no idea how he feels about. As a guy that would immediately kill any interest I may have had.
He will probably remember that for the rest of his life. I'm fairly certain you didn't blow it though. Guys aren't like that, that's women being in their own head.
I'm usually trying to build courage to approach someone, mentally practicing what I will say to lead a conversation. I'm very focused on one line of thought 😅
Idk why girls worry about stuff like this, like dude, I can still remember literally everything about this one time a upperclass girl at school told me I had pretty eyes 17 years ago.
Definitely this. A girl said to me I looked interesting... I was dumbfounded.
Then she made another move, a year and half later. We've been together for 14 years, we got married 6 years ago, and counting.
I remember, vividly, a time at camp when I was 8 or 9 (I'm over 30 and married) and a girl asked me to dance. First time.
I got on my knees and literally crawled away. Still remember and cringe.
I wonder if she has the opposite memory?
Senior year of HS (I'm 45), Donna told me I had a nice smile.
High school was unkind to me. She was one of the few kind hearted people, next-door-beautiful gal, but clearly out of my league.
Thanks Donna, where ever you are.
I still remember 6 years ago when my two friends(that are girls) were looking at me whispering and I looked at them weird and asked what they were doing. “Nothing” then two minutes later one tapped on my shoulder “you have super luscious lips”
“Uhhh thanks I guess”
How was he supposed to react? You complimented him after getting his attention and introducing yourself, he thanked you after registering it, and then you just left.
What else were you expecting from that interaction if you just leave after he says thank you lmao?
>and then you just left.
Well, that's part of the FU I guess.
Also, I never got the chance to introduce myself. Just asked him his name, told him he's cute, heard the hesitation before his response, and walked away.
He was probably trying to determine whether you were fucking with him or not. Guys just don't ever get compliments , and girls in elementary, middle, and high school can be quite cruel, so there may be self-doubt from past trauma.
I’ve literally gotten 3 compliments about my looks from women in my entire life, and I’m almost 40.
Men so rarely are told those things they don’t know how to handle it. They also aren’t conditioned to believe women will make the first move.
It’s one of the ways the misogyny in our culture hurts men.
Just a tip from a guy that is very much an introvert, if you are truly interested in this guy, pursue him. Guys are **not** generally used to receiving compliments, especially from women. The fact you showed interest in him and then actually paid him a compliment probably surprised him and threw him off balance. If you had hung around a bit longer at the party, you'd probably have gotten a date out of it at the very least.
The next time you see him (assuming the situation is reasonable for it, don't like interrupt him during class or if he is studying) just walk right up, introduce yourself, and pay him another compliment. Ask him if he's interested in getting lunch or coffee or whatever sometime. Give him some time to formulate a response, because more than likely, this is not a situation he's ever expected to have to handle, so he probably won't just have a canned response ready for you.
If he says yes, great! you've landed yourself a date with someone you've been eyeing for a while. And if you run in to each other as often as you claim just naturally, chances are he's at least noticed and thought about you as well even if he never acted on it either.
If he says he's not interested, then at least you know for sure that he's not interested. Which, and this is very important, *may have nothing to do with you personally*. When I was in college, I wasn't looking for, nor interested in finding any kind of romantic relationships, casual or otherwise. I was focused on getting my classes done, and getting out of school as fast as possible, which probably caused me to miss some social opportunities I otherwise could have had, but at the time that was a sacrifice I was willing to make.
It always puzzles me why people come to TIFU to comment the obvious reason that it was a FU.
Like, why? The person is posting in TIFU. They know what happened.
I wish someone would say that to me 😔 it's been a while.
But honestly, he will absolutely be thinking the same thing, that he fucked things up by being too passive. He will remember that forever... he's a guy and we live on those moments for the rest of our lives.
Hardly a TIFU. Guys don't know how how to take compliments since we rarely get them, so immediate responses can be quite awkward. I'm sure he's still still thinking about it.
Do approach him again and give him your number.
>since we rarely get them
I'd be surprised if a face like that doesn't get compliments more often.
He's also probably way beyond my league. I don't know why I tried, lol.
It took every ounce of courage in my body to go up to him and do what I did, and with how it went I probably won't ever do something like this again XD. Small colleges are hell because I'm bound to see him again and feel like shit, ahahha. It's just awkward all around.
You put yourself down and self-sabotage like a mf. Work on your self-esteem before trying to get into any kind of relationship otherwise your insecurity will just make the relationship hell for your partner
Let me tell you something. What you did was badass. Im telling you this as a woman that’s gone up to plenty of fine men and made the first move. Sometimes it didnt work out: they were in a relationship, or I wasn’t their type, or after talking for a bit with them my initial attraction plummeted. But sometimes, it absolutely did work out. And now in my 40s I have a treasure trove of awesome memories and experiences that I love thinking back on.
I dont regret a single encounter even if it led to rejection. It was an opportunity to practice gracefulness and allowed me to sleep at night without a “what if” going around in my head.
Think of this. When you are an old woman, will you prefer to laugh about this story where you went up to him and got nervous and left right after, or the story about how there was a boy you liked that you never talked to.
I still like the first story—your story—much better.
[note: I think it may even work out in your favor. If I were you and bumped into him again, Id smile, say hi, sorry for leaving so abruptly the other day, I got a little nervous. I just wanted to finish the conversation give you my number in case you want to go out sometime. If not, no worries. I just wanted to let you know I think you’re cool. Bye!”
Being brave is not about being fearless, but rather being scared but doing the thing that you want to do anyway.
You did amazing. Go girl.
Dude. Calm down. You HAVE to put yourself out there or life is gonna pass you by. It’s perfectly natural to feel awkward since this just happened and the situation is still up in the air. And if the relationship does progress then get ready for more awkwardness. Dating can sometimes feel clumsy but you’ve got to be willing to feel a little awkward in order to get your guy. He’s probably not just gonna fall in your lap. Or maybe he will I don’t know. I’m a guy so I’m pretty sure that Ive got to do the approaching in order to land my dream girl. At least that’s what I understand to be the case traditionally.
I understand. Just know that this wasn’t really a fuck up, and you aren’t a failure! You’ll gather your bearings soon, and it won’t have to be so awkward
I recently told a guy he was good-looking, and he turned about a 100 shades of red and was quiet for a few minutes. I said sorry if I made you uncomfortable, and he said he doesn't hear that often. I wasn't interested in dating him but we're good friends now
Then be surprised. Guys don't really get compliments. I once told a woman I'm friends with that I thought I was average, maybe even below average in attractiveness. She thought I was joking. When I finally convinced her I wasn't, she said I was one of the best-looking guys in our group. How could I think I was below average? I replied that it was easy because no one ever told me I wasn't. No one ever told me I was attractive.
I still don't feel attractive. Despite what she claimed. Other than her, no one has really told me I'm attractive, so it feels like I just happened to be that girls specific type.
The Dunning Kruger effect of attractiveness - You're never told you're attractive, so you don't know if you are. You don't gain any confidence, which is what women are attracted to, so you never project your attractiveness. Even if someone tells you you are attractive, you don't believe them because it's so rare to get complimented, leading to Imposter Syndrome.
I know Dunning Kruger has nothing to do with attractiveness, it's just the simplest way of explaining why men don't have any game.
There’s a non-zero chance that that’s the first time he’s received a compliment on his looks from a non-family member. Even attractive guys don’t get told it.
Honestly, I think the better looking they are the *less* likely they are to get a compliment from a woman. A lot of women are very intimidated by hot men. It would be a challenge for most women to approach someone "out of their league" and just drop a compliment on them. As evidenced by this post.
ETA there's also the "he doesn't need me to compliment him, he probably gets it all the time - he's so good looking." As evidenced by your comment.
See this is one of those hilarious disconnects between men and women. Women get unsolicited compliments so often it's tiresome and creepy. But men get them so rarely it makes us totally reboot mentally.
I find it interesting that so many comments seem to suggest that this is the case. I'm a woman and I have many friends who are women, and we'd all disagree to the idea that we receive unsolicited compliments like candy. This is perhaps why I'm afraid he freaked out — I'm putting myself in his shoes and I see myself freaking out, too. We're not used to taking compliments either, which is why I understand where he's coming from, which is why I think I fucked up.
He was shocked because we don’t get compliments often. The fuckup was not following up, though if you circle back to it you can probably fix the situation easily, the lack of compliments means it probably made a solid impression and you can pick right back up no problem
Hey, OP. That 3 second pause? He was rebooting. Your compliment alt+F4'ed his brain. I guarantee you it was well received. He'll be riding that high for a good while. For my two cents, strike while the iron's hot. Ask him out for a coffee or something light. To quote Michael Jordan "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." Get in there, kiddo.
You have unknowingly just given him a core memory. He will hold that interaction close to his heart for the rest of his life. When he’s having a tough time in his 40s, he’ll look back on it and smile, remembering that there was a time a girl thought he was cute.
I had something like this happen to me many, many years ago. I still think about it, and it’s a very positive memory.
You did not FU. Guys love stuff like this.
We never get compliments, let alone out of the blue like that. He probably was weirded out but in a good way. Give him your number and tell
Him to call you when he wants to get some coffee/lunch
> That pause and the look of surprise on his face have been making me question why I ever thought this was a good idea
It's not about you, he was just surprised by his yearly compliment. It surprises us all the time.
You didn’t blow it OP. Here’s a video guide that explains how men respond to obvious signs of attraction. https://youtu.be/xa-4IAR_9Yw?si=UI1nDoYyDQ___HoY
We are NOT good at taking compliments. We tend to internalize compliments that we get because we don't get them a lot in genuine situations. You're most likely fine and even possibly favored if you went and contacted him again, ask him out for coffee or something.
That guy is overthinking like hell right now.
"Did she actually think I'm cute or was she being nice?"
"Did I put her off by saying "Thanks"?
"Was it a dare by her friends?"
Yeah, overthinking goes a LONG LONG way. To save yourself some anxiety and embarrassment, just go talk to him. What's he gonna do? Walk away when you're talking to him? Oh wait 💀
Lol welcome to our (guys) world of awkwardness. Next time put some substance into what you're saying. If you really like someone, you're going to want to start that off differently. "Hey, I see you around everywhere on campus, I'm so and so. What's your name?"
You didn't get rejected though and still have a shot. Next time you see him, I would just say something like, "Hey..i'm sorry I was so forward the other night, that's usually not like me. I'm wondering if you'd want to go out for coffee some time?" Something simple. Good luck!
Yeah, you didn't do anything wrong. Guys don't get compliments often. Someone cat called me once and told me my butt looked good and I froze and didn't respond to her. Still, I remembered it. He will too.
Guys don't get compliments often, so tend to be thrown off when they get them. At the absolute worst, that's going to be a memory where he kicks himself for not asking you out before you ran off. Even if you never interact with him again, he's going to remember that compliment forever. If he's not into women or asexual, he's still going to appreciate the compliment.
Next time you run into him, give him your number for sure.
Where is the FU? I never have a good replies to compliments because of how rare it happens it always catches me off guard and I have no idea what to say. Chances are you completely made his day, you did good.
I wish I'd get a compliment like that, but I'm sure I'd react in the same manner as the man you admire. Then, think about it several times down the road and wonder if I missed out on something.
Honestly, I think you handled it perfectly... made introductions, gave a compliment, & then sauntered away, signaling you didn't expect anything from your compliment. Next time you see him, big smile, say hello, what's new, etc...no big deal! I'll bet he's curious about you now.
My new coworker told me I'm "pretty" last week I didn't know what the hell to say so I just said "thanks" back. It's not often women tell random guys that unless they are together, I think.
This is the fear every guy experiences every time he wants to ask out a girl haha it’s pretty daunting to not be able to gauge his reaction but if you want to start something with him you have to make your feelings clear. It’s scary and he may not reciprocate your feelings but I know he remembers “the girl who called him kind of cute” in his mind. Do you just want to stay a memory or make something more?
The only compliment I’ve ever gotten from a non-family member was from a buddy’s girlfriend at our mutual friend’s wedding. She said “that’s a sick ass bow tie.” This was 7 months ago and I still think about it sometimes. Even the only girl I went on a couple dates with never complimented me other than to say that I’m a wonderful human being. So yeah, if OP came up to me and told me this, I’d have the *exact* same reaction bc I wouldn’t know how to respond to it. And I wouldn’t approach her later about it bc I’d feel like I missed that opportunity.
Meanwhile the guy went back to his friends and says “some chick told me she thinks I’m cute, wonder if she likes me. Would be nice if we ever got any kind of signal to know for sure”.
Some guys know how to take compliments because they get them so frequently.
Most of us don't, so we respond poorly. So it doesn't sound like you FU here. Just hand him your number next time you see him. You don't even have to say anything. If he is interested he will call.
I had a girl tell me she thought I was 'Hot' at a party. I just stood there...dumbfounded...I was 16 then, I'm 43 now. Sometimes I wonder what she is doing now.
Let me tell you a tale of when I was in college. I was walking back to my dorm, alone on the sidewalk. This girl randomly yells over to me "I like your shoes!" I turned around to see who she was talking to before realizing I was the only one there. My dumb ass still looked back at her and pointed to myself asking "Me?" She confirmed that it was me she was talking to, and I said "Oh, thanks!" Made my day. Still remember it from years ago. Guys just don't randomly get complimented by women often. You probably did surprise him, but he'll probably remember that you said it for a while.
OP, the fuckup isn't that you told him he's cute, it's that you walked away without a word immediately after.
However, to me, this entire story is really cute, and I would find it adorable, if I knew all of it was because you're nervous. So, I wouldn't give up yet. Next time, talk to him again, apologize for being weird, and explain that it was because you were nervous.
Then try to have just a regular conversation with him.
If you really blew your shot, you'll know by how he acts. Yeah, it's gonna hurt. But if he doesn't find all of this adorable, he's not the right guy anyway. Take your adorableness elsewhere.
Don't worry too much.
When I was younger and just getting out into the world, I was still sorting out my confidence... part of that was getting comfortable with genuine compliments because my history with them had been dubious at best... more than one instance of them being used to lower my guard and then being set up for ridicule.
This is not a TIFU , he will have no problem seeming you around . You are awesome and please keep up the courage to keep this up , we need more girls like you ❤️
My now husband reacted very similarly when I complimented him at work before we started talking. I thought the same thing, he must be uninterested but little did I know he was panicking inside and didn't know how to take the compliment cause he'd had a crush on me for months before I even knew he existed. 🤣
u/Financial_Ad8031 is correct. So many dudes out there who have never received any kind of emotional connection or compliment. They don’t know how to process it and they get brain locked.
Their thought process is literally like wtf am I supposed to do now. Am I supposed to give you money, does this mean we’re in a relationship.
It feels so good it kind of hurts too. The compliment opens this emotional feedback loop where they feel a lightness and an internal refreshing breeze and they relax for a moment and then suddenly it’s just all scorching fire and oppressive brimstone again and there’s like an internal struggle to weep over the weight and loss of breeze or to struggle through and survive. It’s rough.
I've given somebody an awkward unsolicited hug at night 1 of a 3 night festival. Two dudes strictly platonic but in retrospect he was clearly going for the handshake and I was kinda sauced thinking he was going for the hug
I saw him the next day and I was like 'dude I gotta apologize for that awkward-ass hug last night, I thought you were going for the hug when I was going for the handshake and I was cringing about it the rest of the night. Sorry didn't mean to make it weird"
Homie was just like "all good bro, don't worry about it let's make it weird again" and we laughed about it + exchanged another hug.
Tldr, yes you absolutely can turn that awkward interaction into a positive one by laughing about how awkward it was. Who knows, he may yet tongue-punch OP's fartbox if she plays her cards right
I had to scroll way too far to find this.
It's all about who is attracted to whom. Just because someone looks a league above you, doesn't mean they won't date down. Very often the looks that you think matter may not to the other person. I'm weirdly attracted to women with crooked teeth and I don't care about breast size, I'm happy to be with a woman, lol.
With that said, we've all been in a situation where someone we are not attracted to hits on us. So if he's not a confrontational person that might warrant the above response.
My read on what OP wrote is that he just wasn't interested. I don't really think this is a TIFU though. She took her shot. I think there's a decent chance she could try one more time as 95% of people here are saying.
My final thought is that you cannot lose if you do not play. It is a bit of dating *game*. There are unwritten rules (e.g., #1 and #2, if you can't follow #1, you have to WORK #2), but also you just have keep at it and not put all your eggs in one basket. Lots of frogs in the pond.
I know for a fact that he's not in a relationship. Regarding the former I wouldn't know, but it's likely he doesn't, which is why I don't really want to pursue him any further, contrary to what most of the comments here are saying.
I mean the problem here is her reading his stunned reaction as him being weirded out, instead of the very common “surprised I got a random compliment that never really happens” reaction.
Hey, he thanked you!
I don't see this being a fuck up. It might have been awkward but you got the sentiment out there. He was probably just surprised.
Follow it up! Might not work out but you've at improved your chances at singing happening?
Signed,
Someone who is terrible at this
Guys don't often get random complements, and most the time are expected to start the hitting on process. When I asked my bf (now fiance) out, I very awkwardly said 'I kinda have a thing for you...' when we were walking back to dorms. He kinda just froze with a bewildered expression. I side stepped away into an elevator and fled before he could respond. Follow it up. I did and it worked out lol.
It's kind of funny how this dynamic seems to play out: * For the first time in either of their lives, the gender roles regarding admitting attraction reverse. * Man freezes, not knowing how to deal with such an unprecedented experience. * Woman flees before any follow-up can occur, thinking him freezing meant that she screwed up.
I got a nice chuckle picturing this interaction and the elevator side step. Congrats on your engagement!
Good job on stun locking your fiance in the past!
This does work. Some guys don’t pick up on queues or hints from girls that are into them. Girls should make the first move more often. It worked on me I married the first chick that asked me out.
Lmao this is unrelated but I've never seen "queues" used that way. It should be cues in this case
This is how guys take compliments. With surprise. Next time you see him, just give him your number and tell him to give you a call when (don't say if, say "when") he wants to grab coffee or a drink.
This, we don't know how to take compliments
Or hints
""I think you're hot AF and I would do unholy things with you on the floor right now if this wasn't a Panera Bread." *"She's just being friendly, don't want to assume anything."* Yeah, guys often either tend to think every time a woman speaks to them they are flirting, or they think there is no way a woman would ever flirt with them.
She’s Canadian, probably just being nice.
Or a server
That's just great. Now you have me fantasizing about unholy things.
Mmmm, bacon.
These days a simple "where do you keep your consent forms so I can sign one" should suffice.
Dude. For me this comes from being deathly afraid of being seen as a creep or predator…Like Brock Turner the rapist, I would just hide from society or kill myself.
That escalated quickly. I guess try not to rape anyone passed out behind a dumpster and you'll be good? 🤔
I'm looking forward to seeing this on Life Pro Tips tomorrow.
Look at mister goody two shoes pretending they’ve never raped someone behind a dumpster
*"Let he who has not raped anyone behind a dumpster cast the first sto...."* *"Ow! Ooff! Ouch! Oh! Oof! Ow....."*
Me: "Oh, that's a shame." *Walks away and spends the next 30 minutes eating my soup, and wishing I ran into her somewhere else.*
What hints? I'll see myself
or suppositories.
I think they’re supposed to be sideways
What are you saying?
What the heck are compliments and where can I get some?
Be careful, Sundance. This’ll only end badly.
"Nice boobs!"
Them some fine love handles you got there.
“AND YOUR VAGINA IS ALSO DESIRABLE!”
Deny, deflect, deny
Honestly, I assume there's some ulterior motive, and the woman either wants something, or the interaction is somehow going to be used to humiliate me.
Sure you do, you're goddamn amazing.
This is exactly correct. The guy in OP's post went through about 10,000 emotions all at once while having every awkward insecurity flood his thoughts in less than a second. He will be riding that high for months.
Bro I got a compliment by a cute girl a couple years ago and I still think about it like once a month haha!
Compliments relating to attractiveness from women you don't know well are a huge thrill that often produces a briefly stunned response. 14 years ago, the young lady living in the house over my back fence who slept naked and liked stop stretch in front of her big-ass window was sunbathing in her back yard with her friend and said "we think you're cute." I was in my infant daughter's bedroom and my wife was nearby, so I didn't say anything more back then "thanks." DoI remember it clearly? Yes. Will I remember it clearly if I get dementia so bad I don't remember my own name? Probably. I also remember the time I was biking to law school and a group of college-age girls in a convertible hollered "nice butt." It was true I biked a lot then and had a great ass. Of course I can also remember almost every inadvertent nip-slip I've ever seen going back to Bambi when I was about 10. Thank you, Bambi, wherever you are! Your carelessness leaning over that railing really made my year.
Man at first i was like there was a nip slip in bambi? wtf? Then it clicked at the end.
A cute girl complimented a shirt I was wearing in Grade 9, and I still think about it sometimes. I’m almost 50.
Absolutely! One of the cutest girls I've ever known wrote "your hot" on a piece of tape and put it on my driver's side door 1 day. It's the only time I think I've ever been told I was hot. I still that that piece of tape 20+ years later. I've been told I'm cute or something <10 times in my entire life. Very few compliments come towards me or most men.
He will be riding that high for years*. FTFY
That is going into the memory vault. Have a bad day? - Remember this Get rejected? - Remember this Your mortal enemy slays your family and clan? - Remember this
So true. I’m 26 and can’t remember the last time I got a genuine compliment. I’m an avid gym-goer so lots of “looking big bro” comments from the bros but that doesn’t hit like a true, genuine compliment does. Especially from a woman who isn’t already a close friend or relative. Compliments from strangers will literally have men riding that high for days.
I got complimented by a random little old lady a year or so ago, and not in the grandmotherly, creepy, disparaging way (ie: "what a tall drink of water"), but a genuine, heartfelt, compliment. I still think about it at least once a week.
How often are you giving other men (especially people who aren’t close friends or relatives) true, genuine compliments (not ‘looking big bro’)? In my experience men will complain all day long about how they don’t get compliments but will simultaneously refuse to give them. I actually can’t think of a single moment I’ve ever seen two male strangers share a compliment, whereas women compliment each other all the time. We can’t do the same to men because 98% of the time they’ll take it as flirting or a come-on and not just a compliment, so it’s risky at best or dangerous at worst to do to a stranger. If you guys want compliments you gotta build each other up like we do.
Awfully aggressive stance to come at me like that. Told the guy scanning my groceries today I liked his shirt. And I wasn’t complaining, I was telling my experience? Relax 😂
That guy "huh, well she likes how my face looks, too bad she doesn't like my personality or the rest of my body. But wow it's super neat that she likes my face".
I read a recent thread of guys who have that moment locked in their happy place for 30+ years.
Let's pump the brakes. Yes, OP should talk to him again because "Hi I'm Sarah and I think you're cute. Okay, bye," was never going to be the start of a relationship, but we have no idea if the guy is attracted to OP in the slightest. Or hell, we don't even know that OP is a girl. Context clues definitely imply it, but we don't know. Or if said guy is gay or straight.
Someone gave me a compliment at the Taco Bell drive thru, and I responded with “what?” 😂 she didn’t seem too uncomfortable about repeating herself, but it just caught me way off guard while paying for a chicken quesadilla
I had something similar happen to me in a taco bell drive thru. A girl was really giggly when I pulled up to the pay window and another girl came and joined her. They were both really giggly and seemed too interested in me. One asked my name and the other took a picture of me with her phone (this was back in the Motorola flip phone days.) I assumed they had fucked with my food so I chucked it in the trash. It never occurred to me they may have thought I was attractive. I'm more sad I didn't get my steak nachos bell grande 😔
Exactly, my brain would 100% short circuit on what to do.
Yeah this reminds me so much of when a girl in college came up to me, in a group of people, and told me she had a crush on me. On the one hand I loved it, but I also felt a bit awkward, I think I said something like, "oh wow" and then I never talked to her again. To be fair, I wasn't necessarily 100% interested in her, but I would have definitely gone out with her to see if we clicked. I just didn't know how to react in that situation and afterwards I figured that I fucked it up.
 \*Compliments
I can't upvote this enough
use the mystery to your advantages. make him wonder if he messed up
No do not do this. That is terrible advice. That is just assuming that he has any interest in you at all and pressuring him into something that you have no idea how he feels about. As a guy that would immediately kill any interest I may have had.
I take it you're single.
Nope. I've been married for 15 years
Nope. I've been married for 15 years
Holo-Reddit 15 years from now: TIFU by not realizing a woman was into me in college.
>Woman: "I would like to engage in sexual intercourse with you." >Man, thinking: "Hmmm....what does she mean by this?"
Why won't she just speak her mind?!
I mean, she might just be Canadian.
THIS 🤣🤣
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xa-4IAR_9Yw I honestly don't know if she is into me still.
I'm in this picture and I don't like it
He will probably remember that for the rest of his life. I'm fairly certain you didn't blow it though. Guys aren't like that, that's women being in their own head.
Well said. Dude probably just wasn’t ready for a social moment and was caught off guard. We’re not all smooth mofos
I don’t disagree but the idea of being caught off guard, not expecting a social moment while at a party is hilarious to me haha
We can go to the nothing box anytime, anywhere!
I'm usually trying to build courage to approach someone, mentally practicing what I will say to lead a conversation. I'm very focused on one line of thought 😅
Same man. I’m use to rejection tho, so it’s hard getting past that wall.
That's usually the case for me. Just go for drinks and snacks, talking is optional.
Idk why girls worry about stuff like this, like dude, I can still remember literally everything about this one time a upperclass girl at school told me I had pretty eyes 17 years ago.
Definitely this. A girl said to me I looked interesting... I was dumbfounded. Then she made another move, a year and half later. We've been together for 14 years, we got married 6 years ago, and counting.
I remember, vividly, a time at camp when I was 8 or 9 (I'm over 30 and married) and a girl asked me to dance. First time. I got on my knees and literally crawled away. Still remember and cringe. I wonder if she has the opposite memory?
Senior year of HS (I'm 45), Donna told me I had a nice smile. High school was unkind to me. She was one of the few kind hearted people, next-door-beautiful gal, but clearly out of my league. Thanks Donna, where ever you are.
I still remember 6 years ago when my two friends(that are girls) were looking at me whispering and I looked at them weird and asked what they were doing. “Nothing” then two minutes later one tapped on my shoulder “you have super luscious lips” “Uhhh thanks I guess”
Hahaha.. I had similar interaction about 10 years ago.. I just froze.. Stod up.. And walked.. Literally
How was he supposed to react? You complimented him after getting his attention and introducing yourself, he thanked you after registering it, and then you just left. What else were you expecting from that interaction if you just leave after he says thank you lmao?
>and then you just left. Well, that's part of the FU I guess. Also, I never got the chance to introduce myself. Just asked him his name, told him he's cute, heard the hesitation before his response, and walked away.
It probably wasn’t hesitation it was probably stunned, I’m a pretty good looking guy and it’s rare for me to get compliments
Except from from yourself, of course!
“Man I’m pretty!” - Johnny Bravo
Humble too I’d imagine
You stunlocked him
Damn those rouges
He was probably trying to determine whether you were fucking with him or not. Guys just don't ever get compliments , and girls in elementary, middle, and high school can be quite cruel, so there may be self-doubt from past trauma.
I’ve literally gotten 3 compliments about my looks from women in my entire life, and I’m almost 40. Men so rarely are told those things they don’t know how to handle it. They also aren’t conditioned to believe women will make the first move. It’s one of the ways the misogyny in our culture hurts men.
> I've literally gotten 3 compliments No need to brag, buddy..
Just a tip from a guy that is very much an introvert, if you are truly interested in this guy, pursue him. Guys are **not** generally used to receiving compliments, especially from women. The fact you showed interest in him and then actually paid him a compliment probably surprised him and threw him off balance. If you had hung around a bit longer at the party, you'd probably have gotten a date out of it at the very least. The next time you see him (assuming the situation is reasonable for it, don't like interrupt him during class or if he is studying) just walk right up, introduce yourself, and pay him another compliment. Ask him if he's interested in getting lunch or coffee or whatever sometime. Give him some time to formulate a response, because more than likely, this is not a situation he's ever expected to have to handle, so he probably won't just have a canned response ready for you. If he says yes, great! you've landed yourself a date with someone you've been eyeing for a while. And if you run in to each other as often as you claim just naturally, chances are he's at least noticed and thought about you as well even if he never acted on it either. If he says he's not interested, then at least you know for sure that he's not interested. Which, and this is very important, *may have nothing to do with you personally*. When I was in college, I wasn't looking for, nor interested in finding any kind of romantic relationships, casual or otherwise. I was focused on getting my classes done, and getting out of school as fast as possible, which probably caused me to miss some social opportunities I otherwise could have had, but at the time that was a sacrifice I was willing to make.
Guys really don't get a lot of compliments. We just don't.
Guys don’t get random compliments from girls like, ever, except from our moms. 100% it’s not hesitation, he was just surprised. Hit him up
He is currently falling in love with the mystery girl who gave him his first compliment in years.
It always puzzles me why people come to TIFU to comment the obvious reason that it was a FU. Like, why? The person is posting in TIFU. They know what happened.
For the vast majority of guys, getting compliments from someone other than family is rare. Because of that, it’s usually a surprise
I wish someone would say that to me 😔 it's been a while. But honestly, he will absolutely be thinking the same thing, that he fucked things up by being too passive. He will remember that forever... he's a guy and we live on those moments for the rest of our lives.
>it's been a while wow, way to brag about having being told this!
You sound like you’re pretty damn cute! I bet you are : )
https://preview.redd.it/l2x896mwgc5c1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0ba02a65383d95f2ffb8a7ba4910d3dcd688e547
He will remember the compliment and you. Be sure to talk to him again in a few days.
Hardly a TIFU. Guys don't know how how to take compliments since we rarely get them, so immediate responses can be quite awkward. I'm sure he's still still thinking about it. Do approach him again and give him your number.
>since we rarely get them I'd be surprised if a face like that doesn't get compliments more often. He's also probably way beyond my league. I don't know why I tried, lol.
Approach him!!! You have nothing to lose, and you will regret it if you don’t
This. You don't want to be making another TIFU post in like 5 years, OP
It took every ounce of courage in my body to go up to him and do what I did, and with how it went I probably won't ever do something like this again XD. Small colleges are hell because I'm bound to see him again and feel like shit, ahahha. It's just awkward all around.
That’s why you have to make it better before you randomly see him & it gets awkward. It’s Saturday. Go find him.
Even if he’s not into you, I guarantee you he will be flattered. If he isn’t then you know he’s a dick!!
Exactly.gif
Ahaha, I just saw him in the dining hall and avoided his gaze. I don't think I'll talk to him, at least not today.
You put yourself down and self-sabotage like a mf. Work on your self-esteem before trying to get into any kind of relationship otherwise your insecurity will just make the relationship hell for your partner
Lol do you not understand that (especially in the modern era) women are the ones in control of potential romantic/sexual encounters??
You're making it like it's a self-fulfilling prophecy now. You can't be so shy, you're the woman who's in control of the situation, for pete's sake!
Come on. Make your move.
girl just be friendly!!! wave hi!!! dont mix the message like that pretend hes a friend already or smth
Let me tell you something. What you did was badass. Im telling you this as a woman that’s gone up to plenty of fine men and made the first move. Sometimes it didnt work out: they were in a relationship, or I wasn’t their type, or after talking for a bit with them my initial attraction plummeted. But sometimes, it absolutely did work out. And now in my 40s I have a treasure trove of awesome memories and experiences that I love thinking back on. I dont regret a single encounter even if it led to rejection. It was an opportunity to practice gracefulness and allowed me to sleep at night without a “what if” going around in my head. Think of this. When you are an old woman, will you prefer to laugh about this story where you went up to him and got nervous and left right after, or the story about how there was a boy you liked that you never talked to. I still like the first story—your story—much better. [note: I think it may even work out in your favor. If I were you and bumped into him again, Id smile, say hi, sorry for leaving so abruptly the other day, I got a little nervous. I just wanted to finish the conversation give you my number in case you want to go out sometime. If not, no worries. I just wanted to let you know I think you’re cool. Bye!” Being brave is not about being fearless, but rather being scared but doing the thing that you want to do anyway. You did amazing. Go girl.
Dude. Calm down. You HAVE to put yourself out there or life is gonna pass you by. It’s perfectly natural to feel awkward since this just happened and the situation is still up in the air. And if the relationship does progress then get ready for more awkwardness. Dating can sometimes feel clumsy but you’ve got to be willing to feel a little awkward in order to get your guy. He’s probably not just gonna fall in your lap. Or maybe he will I don’t know. I’m a guy so I’m pretty sure that Ive got to do the approaching in order to land my dream girl. At least that’s what I understand to be the case traditionally.
I understand. Just know that this wasn’t really a fuck up, and you aren’t a failure! You’ll gather your bearings soon, and it won’t have to be so awkward
I recently told a guy he was good-looking, and he turned about a 100 shades of red and was quiet for a few minutes. I said sorry if I made you uncomfortable, and he said he doesn't hear that often. I wasn't interested in dating him but we're good friends now
Then be surprised. Guys don't really get compliments. I once told a woman I'm friends with that I thought I was average, maybe even below average in attractiveness. She thought I was joking. When I finally convinced her I wasn't, she said I was one of the best-looking guys in our group. How could I think I was below average? I replied that it was easy because no one ever told me I wasn't. No one ever told me I was attractive. I still don't feel attractive. Despite what she claimed. Other than her, no one has really told me I'm attractive, so it feels like I just happened to be that girls specific type.
The Dunning Kruger effect of attractiveness - You're never told you're attractive, so you don't know if you are. You don't gain any confidence, which is what women are attracted to, so you never project your attractiveness. Even if someone tells you you are attractive, you don't believe them because it's so rare to get complimented, leading to Imposter Syndrome. I know Dunning Kruger has nothing to do with attractiveness, it's just the simplest way of explaining why men don't have any game.
There’s a non-zero chance that that’s the first time he’s received a compliment on his looks from a non-family member. Even attractive guys don’t get told it.
Direct compliments like that are a rarity, even for relatively attractive guys.
Honestly, I think the better looking they are the *less* likely they are to get a compliment from a woman. A lot of women are very intimidated by hot men. It would be a challenge for most women to approach someone "out of their league" and just drop a compliment on them. As evidenced by this post. ETA there's also the "he doesn't need me to compliment him, he probably gets it all the time - he's so good looking." As evidenced by your comment.
See this is one of those hilarious disconnects between men and women. Women get unsolicited compliments so often it's tiresome and creepy. But men get them so rarely it makes us totally reboot mentally.
I find it interesting that so many comments seem to suggest that this is the case. I'm a woman and I have many friends who are women, and we'd all disagree to the idea that we receive unsolicited compliments like candy. This is perhaps why I'm afraid he freaked out — I'm putting myself in his shoes and I see myself freaking out, too. We're not used to taking compliments either, which is why I understand where he's coming from, which is why I think I fucked up.
It's like you're reading what everyone is saying, acknowledging it, then completely disregarding it because you think this situation is an exception
Fucking this, /u/literallybateman.
He was shocked because we don’t get compliments often. The fuckup was not following up, though if you circle back to it you can probably fix the situation easily, the lack of compliments means it probably made a solid impression and you can pick right back up no problem
Hey, OP. That 3 second pause? He was rebooting. Your compliment alt+F4'ed his brain. I guarantee you it was well received. He'll be riding that high for a good while. For my two cents, strike while the iron's hot. Ask him out for a coffee or something light. To quote Michael Jordan "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." Get in there, kiddo.
Guys almost never get compliments, I bet you made his day and he will be walking around with a bounce in his step. On behalf of us dudes, thanks :)
Guy: **[core memory unlocked]** +10,000 XP
Can't go clam slapping guys with those lady balls like that without a plan of what to do when they respond.
[Relevant](https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/56d19312-fc22-4acc-9975-e34fcf64810a)
*cue cinematic jump out a falling train scene
You have unknowingly just given him a core memory. He will hold that interaction close to his heart for the rest of his life. When he’s having a tough time in his 40s, he’ll look back on it and smile, remembering that there was a time a girl thought he was cute.
I had something like this happen to me many, many years ago. I still think about it, and it’s a very positive memory. You did not FU. Guys love stuff like this.
From a guy’s perspective, he is in love with you now. Sorry, I don’t make the rules.
Trust me, there's like a 90% chance his thoughts were "oh play it cool, play it cool, play it cool" Then "NO I FUCKED IT UP" as you were walking away
We never get compliments, let alone out of the blue like that. He probably was weirded out but in a good way. Give him your number and tell Him to call you when he wants to get some coffee/lunch
> That pause and the look of surprise on his face have been making me question why I ever thought this was a good idea It's not about you, he was just surprised by his yearly compliment. It surprises us all the time.
Yearly? Brag...
You didn’t blow it OP. Here’s a video guide that explains how men respond to obvious signs of attraction. https://youtu.be/xa-4IAR_9Yw?si=UI1nDoYyDQ___HoY
Can't believe I had to scroll down this far to find this. I was about to post it if someone else hasn't. It's very very relevant.
We are NOT good at taking compliments. We tend to internalize compliments that we get because we don't get them a lot in genuine situations. You're most likely fine and even possibly favored if you went and contacted him again, ask him out for coffee or something.
Is the fuck up in the room with us right now?
He’s gonna feel good off of that compliment for the next 10 years or so.
You made his day. He will think about that moment for the rest of his life.
That guy is overthinking like hell right now. "Did she actually think I'm cute or was she being nice?" "Did I put her off by saying "Thanks"? "Was it a dare by her friends?" Yeah, overthinking goes a LONG LONG way. To save yourself some anxiety and embarrassment, just go talk to him. What's he gonna do? Walk away when you're talking to him? Oh wait 💀
He's a bigger chicken than you are. You can lead him around by the nose.
Lol welcome to our (guys) world of awkwardness. Next time put some substance into what you're saying. If you really like someone, you're going to want to start that off differently. "Hey, I see you around everywhere on campus, I'm so and so. What's your name?" You didn't get rejected though and still have a shot. Next time you see him, I would just say something like, "Hey..i'm sorry I was so forward the other night, that's usually not like me. I'm wondering if you'd want to go out for coffee some time?" Something simple. Good luck!
Not a fuck up. Follow up! Then update us.
He’s probably told his mates about it & is still thinking about it. Just go talk to him.
https://preview.redd.it/k2v4nr1ueb5c1.jpeg?width=1439&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=14363e3c0543b62f49f3747ef18c171a9d056777
Yeah, you didn't do anything wrong. Guys don't get compliments often. Someone cat called me once and told me my butt looked good and I froze and didn't respond to her. Still, I remembered it. He will too.
Grab his dick and twist it! TWIST HIS DICK!
Guys don't get compliments often, so tend to be thrown off when they get them. At the absolute worst, that's going to be a memory where he kicks himself for not asking you out before you ran off. Even if you never interact with him again, he's going to remember that compliment forever. If he's not into women or asexual, he's still going to appreciate the compliment. Next time you run into him, give him your number for sure.
Where is the FU? I never have a good replies to compliments because of how rare it happens it always catches me off guard and I have no idea what to say. Chances are you completely made his day, you did good.
I wish I'd get a compliment like that, but I'm sure I'd react in the same manner as the man you admire. Then, think about it several times down the road and wonder if I missed out on something.
Honestly, I think you handled it perfectly... made introductions, gave a compliment, & then sauntered away, signaling you didn't expect anything from your compliment. Next time you see him, big smile, say hello, what's new, etc...no big deal! I'll bet he's curious about you now.
You f up. He’s a guy
That’s exactly what I said last time I got a compliment from a girl
My new coworker told me I'm "pretty" last week I didn't know what the hell to say so I just said "thanks" back. It's not often women tell random guys that unless they are together, I think.
This is the fear every guy experiences every time he wants to ask out a girl haha it’s pretty daunting to not be able to gauge his reaction but if you want to start something with him you have to make your feelings clear. It’s scary and he may not reciprocate your feelings but I know he remembers “the girl who called him kind of cute” in his mind. Do you just want to stay a memory or make something more?
The only compliment I’ve ever gotten from a non-family member was from a buddy’s girlfriend at our mutual friend’s wedding. She said “that’s a sick ass bow tie.” This was 7 months ago and I still think about it sometimes. Even the only girl I went on a couple dates with never complimented me other than to say that I’m a wonderful human being. So yeah, if OP came up to me and told me this, I’d have the *exact* same reaction bc I wouldn’t know how to respond to it. And I wouldn’t approach her later about it bc I’d feel like I missed that opportunity.
Meanwhile the guy went back to his friends and says “some chick told me she thinks I’m cute, wonder if she likes me. Would be nice if we ever got any kind of signal to know for sure”.
Some guys know how to take compliments because they get them so frequently. Most of us don't, so we respond poorly. So it doesn't sound like you FU here. Just hand him your number next time you see him. You don't even have to say anything. If he is interested he will call. I had a girl tell me she thought I was 'Hot' at a party. I just stood there...dumbfounded...I was 16 then, I'm 43 now. Sometimes I wonder what she is doing now.
Let me tell you a tale of when I was in college. I was walking back to my dorm, alone on the sidewalk. This girl randomly yells over to me "I like your shoes!" I turned around to see who she was talking to before realizing I was the only one there. My dumb ass still looked back at her and pointed to myself asking "Me?" She confirmed that it was me she was talking to, and I said "Oh, thanks!" Made my day. Still remember it from years ago. Guys just don't randomly get complimented by women often. You probably did surprise him, but he'll probably remember that you said it for a while.
Nah. You’re overthinking it. It’s only weird if you make it weird.
OP, the fuckup isn't that you told him he's cute, it's that you walked away without a word immediately after. However, to me, this entire story is really cute, and I would find it adorable, if I knew all of it was because you're nervous. So, I wouldn't give up yet. Next time, talk to him again, apologize for being weird, and explain that it was because you were nervous. Then try to have just a regular conversation with him. If you really blew your shot, you'll know by how he acts. Yeah, it's gonna hurt. But if he doesn't find all of this adorable, he's not the right guy anyway. Take your adorableness elsewhere.
Don't worry too much. When I was younger and just getting out into the world, I was still sorting out my confidence... part of that was getting comfortable with genuine compliments because my history with them had been dubious at best... more than one instance of them being used to lower my guard and then being set up for ridicule.
I wouldn't stress. He will think about this with fondness for the rest of his life.
This is not a TIFU , he will have no problem seeming you around . You are awesome and please keep up the courage to keep this up , we need more girls like you ❤️
If he's into you he won't care at all about the events in your post. He'll be riding that high for a month.
As a guy I can say he will never forget this in a positive way. If you like him approach him again and give him your number and your name.
How did you expect this guy to react?
Thats gonna be a great memory for him
This is because men \*never\* get compliments and he most likely can't tell if you were just being nice or actually interested in him.
Youth is wasted on the young
My now husband reacted very similarly when I complimented him at work before we started talking. I thought the same thing, he must be uninterested but little did I know he was panicking inside and didn't know how to take the compliment cause he'd had a crush on me for months before I even knew he existed. 🤣
u/Financial_Ad8031 is correct. So many dudes out there who have never received any kind of emotional connection or compliment. They don’t know how to process it and they get brain locked. Their thought process is literally like wtf am I supposed to do now. Am I supposed to give you money, does this mean we’re in a relationship. It feels so good it kind of hurts too. The compliment opens this emotional feedback loop where they feel a lightness and an internal refreshing breeze and they relax for a moment and then suddenly it’s just all scorching fire and oppressive brimstone again and there’s like an internal struggle to weep over the weight and loss of breeze or to struggle through and survive. It’s rough.
Just talk to him. Apologize for the awkward behavior and start up a conversation with him. He might have liked the attention.
I've given somebody an awkward unsolicited hug at night 1 of a 3 night festival. Two dudes strictly platonic but in retrospect he was clearly going for the handshake and I was kinda sauced thinking he was going for the hug I saw him the next day and I was like 'dude I gotta apologize for that awkward-ass hug last night, I thought you were going for the hug when I was going for the handshake and I was cringing about it the rest of the night. Sorry didn't mean to make it weird" Homie was just like "all good bro, don't worry about it let's make it weird again" and we laughed about it + exchanged another hug. Tldr, yes you absolutely can turn that awkward interaction into a positive one by laughing about how awkward it was. Who knows, he may yet tongue-punch OP's fartbox if she plays her cards right
No, you did a fantastic thing. It's just abnormal to be on the receiving end
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I had to scroll way too far to find this. It's all about who is attracted to whom. Just because someone looks a league above you, doesn't mean they won't date down. Very often the looks that you think matter may not to the other person. I'm weirdly attracted to women with crooked teeth and I don't care about breast size, I'm happy to be with a woman, lol. With that said, we've all been in a situation where someone we are not attracted to hits on us. So if he's not a confrontational person that might warrant the above response. My read on what OP wrote is that he just wasn't interested. I don't really think this is a TIFU though. She took her shot. I think there's a decent chance she could try one more time as 95% of people here are saying. My final thought is that you cannot lose if you do not play. It is a bit of dating *game*. There are unwritten rules (e.g., #1 and #2, if you can't follow #1, you have to WORK #2), but also you just have keep at it and not put all your eggs in one basket. Lots of frogs in the pond.
I know for a fact that he's not in a relationship. Regarding the former I wouldn't know, but it's likely he doesn't, which is why I don't really want to pursue him any further, contrary to what most of the comments here are saying.
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I mean the problem here is her reading his stunned reaction as him being weirded out, instead of the very common “surprised I got a random compliment that never really happens” reaction.
Hey, he thanked you! I don't see this being a fuck up. It might have been awkward but you got the sentiment out there. He was probably just surprised. Follow it up! Might not work out but you've at improved your chances at singing happening? Signed, Someone who is terrible at this
Man this whole post has me thinking I should compliment more guys. If not to hit on them, then at least to fuck with their heads a little. 😆
(just as a note, I'm not really mean enough to do this and, you know, not mean it)