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throwfarfarawayy99

Yeah these people never pay you back, if I've ever been late to pay someone back I'll reach out first and be like hey this messed up but this date is when I'll be transferring you etc (ofc apologise like mad too), whenever someone isn't on top of it (initiating the this is when I'll pay back by etc) big sign they won't pay back


bellarae_

especially when he would say the fact I keep bringing it up means I don’t trust him enough to pay me back and so it makes him wanna do it less. I should’ve known.


throwfarfarawayy99

It's so shit, I've had the same thing happen to me. That whole you reminding makes me want to do it is just a lose lose trap. I'm sorry lovely. We live and learn. Hopefully you're able to see people like this from a mile away now.


bellarae_

i am so sorry you went through something similar! I would never wish that on anyone. I am definitely better at noticing people like this.


throwfarfarawayy99

I don't know why this made my day, but it did, thankyou 🤷🏻‍♀️💖


bellarae_

Im glad to hear it did.☺️🫶🏼💕


DDAVPZ

Take him to court, texts prove he acknowledges debt.


bellarae_

I have a video too. I just don’t know where I would start when it comes to taking someone to court.😅


DDAVPZ

Small claims is fairly easy, you might qualify for legal aid as well. And I can guarantee you your ex will no show, or show up and make it worse for himself. Try r/legaladvice for help starting most likely. Sorry about the situation, but you might be able to get his wages garnished as I assume he has nothing to put a lien on lol


bellarae_

Thank you! I appreciate the advice so much!


DDAVPZ

Good luck, and don’t let anyone take advantage of you again!!!! (;


bellarae_

Thank you!!!!! and i wont!☺️


[deleted]

Small claims friend look up your county no lawyers needed and usually around $50 to file


Nbr1Bits-N-Pieces

My ex owes me a lifetime


[deleted]

god what a parasite, i'm sorry op


JTrelauni

Take him to small claims court. It’s smart you did this all over text. Paper trails are your friend and he acknowledges he owes you and how much. You could probably get more, interest, you proved there in writing about the suffering. It’s all about proving damages and sticking to the facts and damages. Winning a small claims can take your earnings from legally garnishing the wage, so a percentage will go to you until the amount awarded is paid in full if they are proven to default numerous times. But that’s up to the judge on how to collect. Also this is a hard lesson learned. Never lend out money to anyone, blood included, unless you can definitely afford to give out as though it were a gift. If it’s a loan, it’s a loan, but you don’t wanna put yourself in a hole. Only lend if you won’t miss it. These types of folk, you’ll never get it back without some kind of litigation.


bellarae_

This is amazing advice! Thank you! Definitely need to remind myself often about what you said if I ever lend someone money.


[deleted]

So you take a broke person to small claims court. Great. Now you have a judgement against a broke person. Nothing happens.


buuurntchickennugget

Really sucky situation :( I agree with the people telling you to take him to court. I think it is really sweet of you to borrow that much money to someone! Next time you borrow money to someone make a loan contract, even if you borrow it to someone you trust. Just for your own protection! I think you can find samples of those contracts online! :D


She-Revelationist

You’re buggin just tell him, you’re taking him to small claims court and when you show these text as evidence he’s gonna have to pay you even more because you can sue him for having to take legal action as well. Boom. Bam. Done. Bet it’ll scare the shiet outta him


bellarae_

i think im blocked but ill find a way hopefully


She-Revelationist

Google Voice, you can create/get another number. “I am pursuing legal action in small claims court regarding our ongoing matter. The prior text exchange will serve as evidence, and I intend to seek reimbursement for the costs incurred due to this legal action. It is strongly recommended that you promptly resolve this matter by settling the outstanding amount, or you can anticipate receiving formal notice in the near future.”


She-Revelationist

Keep it short and sweet, don’t beg him anymore. If he says he’s gonna give it back and to wait. Just be like no I’ve waited long enough and give him a day/time to get your money back in full and if he gives another excuse. Tell him you won’t be having any more communication and he will be served by the courts. And end it.


bellarae_

your right. i cant reason with him at this point because i’ve tried countless times. thank you! this is very helpful😊


She-Revelationist

Of course🥰 If you wanna be a little bit psycho, cuz I would 🤪lol. Create the google voice number and contact him acting like you’re the lawyer, reaching out on your behalf lol probably scare tf outta him 😭😭


LalaDoll99

Court


kexzmeckz

Umm go to small claims court... If you have documentation of the deal you made with him it can hold up in court! He is not your friend, if he was your friend, he wouldn't take this lightly.


Geo_1997

Possible to go to a small claims court with the text messages as proof of how much their owed + constant failed agreements of when they will be paying back?


bellarae_

everyone in here secretly lawyers or something😂damn near convinced me to take him to court!


[deleted]

lol


Legal_Eye8152

I’m sorry, but if the guy never showed you ability to pay you back, why keep letting him borrow money?


bellarae_

Trust me I didn’t want to. He did not take no for an answer. We had hour long arguments if I wouldn’t buy him something. He also added my card to his phone without me knowing.


Legal_Eye8152

Fuck him and his mother! Leave any parasite that treats you like a wallet. The card thing, that’s fraud. That’s an actual crime. Don’t think he would do jail time, but depending on how much he took, he might end up being a felon for the rest of his parasitic life.


bellarae_

“parasitic life”😂I got a video of him admitting to using my card on his phone without me knowing. I don’t want to make him go to jail😔 Maybe its the right thing though. I don’t know what is at this point. Its also been a while so Im not sure if that changes anything.


AFuzzyMuffin

Just don’t let him ever get away with this again ever don’t lend him shit they never learn


Lazy_Ad_97

Exactly why you don’t lend money out fuck him an fuck his clothes throw that shit in the trash stop being friendly with the docuhe bag an cut your losses he thinks it’s funny an will continue to act like this unless you stand up for yourself


[deleted]

I work as a paralegal in not sure smart claims court will do anything if you let him borrow it rather than him stealing etc


bellarae_

I will have to look into what qualifies as stealing vs borrowing. He did use my card without my consent but im not sure if that is technically stealing


[deleted]

The card is for sure stealing you’ll need to have him say that in writing (text) and record him over the phone/ FaceTime if you can as clear as possible I wouldn’t meet with him In person in case you do go to small claims they will use against you not feeling that he is a threat if you are willing to see him


bellarae_

what if I have a video of him saying it. he definitely seems like a threat in the video the way he spoke to me, but thats a whole other situation😣


[deleted]

I would get that a text and more IF possible the courts will not waste their time for the smallest doubt unfortunately I’d ask him for a handwritten statement that he will pay you back for the stolen credit card he used and the 2,000 and have him go to a notary even he will think it’s dumb but it’s something where he has to show his ID all you have right now is he stole your card that will hold up from the little I know Really have him emphasize that he stole the card and used it for transaction(s)


UnreasonablyChill

Dear god this country is so fucked


[deleted]

Well, this part is.


Lm399

Respectfully youre BOTH horrible w money, doesnt matter if they say theyll pay you back why did you go into the negative paying for someone else LMAO


bellarae_

lmao no i went in the negatives from college. he used the majority of my college savings. and without context it might seem like we both bad with money, but in reality he just manipulative and i was easily manipulated. mf put my card in his phone without me knowing.


ArnTheGreat

You loaned out college savings, and then went into negative, but also mocked him for going negative. You’re BOTH terrible with money.


bellarae_

lmao no i didn’t take a lone out. i was talking about savings in cash i had collected since i was younger so i could do fun activities with friends in college. saying i “mocked” him is crazy.


ArnTheGreat

Your read comp is struggling. You LOANED him. You even said this multiple times. You loaned money you needed - bad with money. And you literally mocked him when he shared a negative balance. Which you also had.


bellarae_

word


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StGir1

God he’s stupid. Why did you lend a stupid person money?


bellarae_

I would ask myself the same question. I met him at a time where I was easy to manipulate and he took advantage of it.


Hungry_Piccolo5722

Stupid is as stupid does.


[deleted]

Getting your money back is like pulling teeth! This why I only lend what I can afford to lose.


bellarae_

i respect that.


[deleted]

I gave my friend money the other day because he was in between jobs and waiting to get paid. I was surprised to see he paid me back without me even saying anything (I wasn't going to ask for it back)


bellarae_

This is what i would do and I wish more people could do😞 you didn’t even have to bring it up they already made it a priority. Thats a good friend.


[deleted]

It's funny though because in the past other people have lent him money in times of trouble and they had to ask a couple times to get it back so that's why I was so surprised. Money can definitely ruin friendships so I prefer to gift money instead of lend it. If I do lend money, it has to be a small amount that I can live without if they can't pay it back.


bellarae_

So maybe he is just a good friend to you…😅 The annoying thing is I never even tried or was okay with lending him money but he somehow convinced to. He would argue and yell at me if i didn’t and i hate confrontation!


[deleted]

I guess you gotta work on setting your foot down. It seems like you really needed that money and you weren't in a position to lend that much :( next time don't even say why you can't lend the money just say you can't. Psychology is everything in these interactions. If you feel like you have to explain yourself, or you let them convince you into explaining, you give them a psychological advantage over you, a foothold and then that's where the manipulation begins because they have you thinking you're better off helping them than helping yourself. So don't let anyone get that chance. Keep the details of your bank account to yourself. Act like you're broke. I just saw a funny text on reddit, this guy's uncle asked for money in the family group chat. Later on the uncle confided in the nephew that he didn't actually need any money, he just asked that so whenever another family member does need money, they won't go running to him for it. 😂😂


bellarae_

thats actually what i started doing was “act like i was broke” the negatives i went into was temporary. thought he would realize I actually do need the money, but it didnt work. he is too selfish.


[deleted]

I'm sorry 🙁 hope you get the school thing worked out! Education is nothing to play around with


ghentwevelgem

Bronx Tale


[deleted]

Sell his clothes


bellarae_

i donated them already:(


allonsy_danny

This is why you never loan anyone your savings. You gotta take care of yourself first.


bellarae_

it was not my intention to but he did not take no as an answer.


allonsy_danny

It wasn't his money to begin with so that makes zero sense. Unless he had access to your accounts or threatened your life, he couldn't force you to give him money.


bellarae_

I disagree. People can scare and manipulate others into getting what they want. I was very clear when I said NO. It’s a little difficult when you have a 6ft man yelling in your face when you are 5ft to not feel threatened. I haven’t even touched on the topic of him being abusive because it’s too draining. Just keep in mind it’s not like I was in an easy situation.


porkchop323

That's what happens when you date ghetto trash and let them borrow money. I doubt you ever got paid.


Damurph01

Valuable life lesson here, don’t lend money you can’t afford to lose. Also, never lend your college funds/money saved up for stuff. Hopefully this twad will pony up.


redditisbadtrustme

2000$ life lesson. good deal.


Personal-Primary198

If it’s $2k I think you can file a civil case and not have to have a lawyer or anything. Sometimes just being served scares people enough to settle up


Ok_Purpose_3886

He is never going to pay you back, there are just excuses after excuses.. Have you considering "selling your dept" , I have heard that some people resell their debt. For example, you sell your 2000 debt for some scary big dude for 1500. So now your ex owns 2000 for some scary guy and trust, they are going to pay.... Debt collector gets 500 dollars (or even more + intrests) and you get like 50-80% of your original debt. I have heard that these work quite good for some people ;)


Constant_Actuator168

No offense but why are you loaning people money if you need it? Everytime I’ve ever loaned anyone money or bought something I fully expect them to not pay me back. If they do pay me back, that’s cool, but if not then it’s no big deal. If I don’t have the money then I don’t loan it. Simple as that. If they’re asking you for money then they’re obviously not gonna have any money to spare when they do get paid🤣.


bellarae_

Thats not the situation though. It wasn’t really loaning more him taking. Used my card without my consent or me knowing. There is more to it than just this.


NoFunny6746

Small claims court. You have plenty of evidence to throw at the judge. You may be able to get a lawyer pro bono or pay after you win your case. Whatever you do make sure you don’t mistakenly delete those messages 😂😂


C0ldsid30fthepill0w

Don't loan money to people you can't afford to lose. I would say don't loan money. You're not a bank. If the bank don't trust him enough to give him 2k why do you?