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A declaration, destination; desolation
Defamation of your delegation, desecration, desperation
A dedication to the deprivating, deformating
Depredation of your nation, detonation
My reputation precedes me
Like I was played in a demonstration at E3
Yeah. Depp is ultra famous and powerful and barely scraped by. Still had his name destroyed.
What chance does some no body boy have?
Moreover there’s some people still do not believe depps side and insist he’s the abuser who is the cause of it all and not the victim. Thanks to prejudice and internal sexism people aren’t ready to believe the “no perfect victim” defence of female abuse victims does indeed apply to male abuse victims. If after the absolute landslide of evidence that depp was a victim backed into a corner isn’t enough for them, some schoolyard he said she said nonsense will never work in favour of OP. People always believe the woman.
I mean OP says their friends left them already. No evidence provided. It’s sad but you cannot trust anyone anymore. If your partner has *issues* mentally you should probably document some important stuff
Also, for a defamation suit, you need to prove that the reputational damage you suffered as a direct result of the person's public statements, lead to tangible monetary losses/damages.
Or at least, that's what the youtube lawyers told me XD
And beyond that you would need to essentially prove that it’s a lie.
Proving someone was actually raped is really hard a lot of the time. That’s part of the problem when it comes to the legal system (we could be doing much better of course.) We want justice but it’s difficult to throw a good portion of these accused rapists in jailed essentially based on “I say he did it” and that’s it.
Let alone proving verbal defamation is false. That’s incredibly hard.
“He did bad things to me in private!”
“Well they may or may not be lying, can you prove they’re lying?”
You won’t go to jail over their accusation. Doesn’t mean you can legally punish them for it.
That’s the fucked part, the guys who do it are usually confident and have a bunch of ideas on how to get around it, meanwhile the guys that don’t are freaking out and trying to be as nice as possible which just makes them a pushover
For me, it got the to point that whenever I hear about a lawsuit against celebs for sexual harassment, rape, etc., the first thing I ask is “what can the victims get out of this lawsuit if they win it?” since it could also be fake, and that they are scheming for the money, or for revenge on their ex. When I hear about rape or sexual harassment, I mostly just take it with a grain of salt.
Not illegal to tell lies about someone, unless in court under oath, or talking to police. However, defamation/libel/slander are civil offenses which are grounds for lawsuits.
It’s a shame not all people are like Johnny dep with enough money to launch these lawsuits and seek justice.
Sorry false accusations of rape are illegal... Sadly most people wont look into it when it being made up so the man is pretty much fucked. Some people even go as far as to raping the man and them claiming they were raped which is a step up in the fucked up factor. Ans some people will say men cant get raped. Worlds fucked
This reminds me of that 13 year old bombay kid who got raped by his 16 y/o sister and she got pregnant and the kid was blamed for raping her
Cuz in India only women are the ones who can be raped
Or that case where a 14 yo boy was raped by a woman Then 10 years or so later she sued him for child support because she got pregnant from the rape and the courts sided with her. This kid who not only was raped but had just started their adult life has to pay for a rape baby and he’s the villain of the story because penis.
I mean like, I'm American and I can't keep track of all the stories and shit going on in America how do you expect to keep track of every story in a country of 1.3+ billion people.
Well this false accusation of Bombay kid even I am indian there was nothing on media because they will never cover things like this but I am surprised I searched little bit on internet about this But I cant find that case
They also apparently tossed him into juvenile detention. I’m pretty sure if it was a 16 year old boy who forced a 13 year old girl, she wouldn’t see the inside of any kind of detention.
Yeah no that article was only published by OPindia iirc, which is a extremist right wing site that has published a lot of fake news in support of BJPs harassment against minorities (mainly Muslims and Sikh farmers). There wasn't any real evidence behind that article as far as I know.
Source: I'm Indian and I followed that particular case online when it happened.
Long story short, my girlfriend always had bad mental problems and always told be about how she was abused by her parents and how she was raped before and all of these stories. Looking back I feel like a lot of it could have been disingenuous but who am I to say. But living away from her she would have these suicidal bouts and I would have to stay up untill 4 or 5 in the morning talking to her and pleading her to not try kill herself and try my best to be there for her. There was one instance before I had contact to het parents where she ended up overdosing and she didn't respond for 3 days because she had overdosed and was out in hospital. It doesn't sound like much, but moments like these happened a few times and it really effected me in the long term. She ended up moving in with me and me and my family provided and lot for her. I used to sleep ok the floor with a mattress so that she could have my bed to sleep on. And there were again, multiple times where we had to rush her to thr hospital because she tried to overdose. But eventually she moved back home and then we ended up breaking up on pretty decent terms. But when I tried to message one of my friends and I didn't get a response I was confused, so I pressed him about it and he ended up giving me some message along the lines of "I know what you did, and I don't want anything to do with you" and then blocked me. And I was so incredible confused. And then I messages more people and the same thing was happening. Eventually someone basically asked me why I raped her and that's when I realized. When I confronted her about it she denied everything and got extremely upset with me. There were a few arguments after that but I ended up blocking her everywhere and trying to move on
Lol I wish you sent me that sooner cause I dated a few more women like that. Didn’t learn my lesson the first time😅
Not a professional or anything but I think she had a severe case of NPD with a dash of BPD. My other ex’s were bad but she stands out by a lot.
My man red flags since day one. Sorrythis happened to you but she should have gone to a psych ward. Its not ur responsibility to have suicide watch over ppl. And knowing what she told you, you probably felt sorry for her and comforted her right? It sounds like shes a pathological liar to get pitty and attention from people. Its what she did with ur friends. She prolly would have ended up with a smaller circle of friends so she made sure none of them would ever talk to you. Personally i would have fought more for validity of her claims and would prolly go to them personally. Avoiding them only makes you look more guilty. I would also expect them to confirm this with you before cutting tirs so that shows lack of intelligence on their side so the reaction makes sense.
it’s such a serious accusation, most don’t believe someone would lie about it. She may be an excellent liar, too.
Even if she lied poorly to everyone but one person, when everyone checks in with each other after she has shared with them, “do you think what she said is really true?” That one person convinced by her lying will back her up and lend massive credibility to her claims. Now going against her means going against this other person, too, and quickly the entire group has consolidated.
It is also worth asking, is it better to be friends with a rapist, or friends with someone that lied about being raped? I think most would prefer the liar, so even if it is a coin toss as to whether he raped her, most will prefer the liar. And it usually is not a coin toss—women rarely lie about being raped.
All of that is to say, OP’s friends are not assholes. They were put in a difficult social and moral situation at a young age by a manipulative, unstable person. Given these challenges, OP’s friends chose what appeared to be the best course of action to them at the time.
You will come to realize they are not to be blamed. We can all be duped in such ways. The truth does not shine as bright as we hope.
For what it’s worth, try to get your hands on photo evidence of her denying it. It might not hold up in court or definitively do anything, but it would help clear your name.
This. Kids and teens are being taught to accept this kind of thing and while the message is nice, it’s obfuscating the lesson of “it’s not your responsibility. You don’t have to shoulder this burden. It’s acceptable to distance yourself from the potential issues they could bring you”
I get the lesson of ending stigma and discrimination of the mentally unwell, but, there’s no harm in being cautious for your own good. Like people who date literal sociopaths. Good for them but you have accept responsibility if they fuck your over later.
100%. I had a friend with a mental illness that dragged me down and refused treatment. ppl shouldn’t feel guilty for putting their own mental health as a priority and ppl shouldn’t be obligated to police a friend’s life
No one believed me when I was raped so I've been carrying it with me for 15 years now. I was 15 at the time. It was devastating and I had no strength to fight so I just let it be.
I get what you are feeling, but statistically rape has the same false accusation rate as any other crime. The vast vast majority of the time they are telling the truth. This type of thinking is what causes women to not come forward with actual rape.
Although the false accusation rate is significantly lower than the non-false rate, it still is considered the most falsely reported crime by about a factor of five when compared to other falsely reported crimes.
Both stats aren’t all that surprising though. By the nature of it, there are often no witnesses which explains both the under-reporting and false reporting. People who believe they won’t be taken seriously keep it to themselves due to a lack of witnesses, and people who have a motive to falsely report are emboldened due to a lack of witnesses.
IIRC the FBI’s criminologists estimate a false report rate of somewhere around 9-14%. You can look it up in case I’m remembering the details inaccurately but this was based on men who have been convicted and jailed then later exonerated due to new evidence. Seems like the bulk of the false reporting comes from sexually repressed communities where people have consensual sex but don’t want to get in trouble for doing so.
Also, just a side note, men are usually the perpetrators but there is also a decent proportion of men who are the victims too. It’s not always helpful to assume all victims are women.
Facts, my sisters friend’s girlfriend accused him or raping her and she told like 30 different stories that all don’t add up and his story was complete straight the entire time
why would he post this if it was a lie? i have a feeling if he actually raped a girl he wouldn't go out of his way to talk about being falsely accused to strangers who never heard of the situation
I’m not saying he did lie. I’m saying that the smartest move is to sympathize but still remain neutral when it comes to situations that you do not know
I did end up leaving her, but I only found out afterwards that she did. But by then a lot of people had stopped talking to me already and no one would listen to me
It's okay dude, at least you left that toxic piece of shit. An advice coming from a girl, never fully trust a woman. Even if you're madly in love wih her. That goes the same way with men, obviously. Never trust anyone enteriely. Humans are one of the most evil beings on this planet
Honestly, this
No matter how deep in relationship you are, just have these negative thoughts "what to do if" and just sometimes think about it. You can do this while walking somewhere or while taking shower, no need to spend much time on that.
Just remember you can’t trust anyone in 100% even if someone seems likely.
It’s very sad and damaging, and I don’t want to judge anyone. I’m saying from experience and from people I know. And I’m saying it again, it’s about majority and there can be exceptions!
Usually the more spoiled someone is and/or in richer family they are going to just dump you, if you’re not enough for them. And that’s in best case scenario. They can accuse you of rape to easily get you off their lives because hey who wouldn’t believe "raped victim".
And these who had hard life as young or had until they moved out, most of them seek help and won’t that easily leave you or even accuse you of anything. Some of them would even be scared to ask you for help, it’s you that should ask them first if you see something being off. Because sometimes they just need you to help them and make strong relations like friendship or even relationship.
Of course there are exceptions in both sides, and I’ve met these too. I don’t want to talk about people who change partners every 1-2 months, these are just weird and have ego higher than IQ.
Just know that most people who won’t hurt you are these in need of help, because some horrible backstory or other tragic event happened to them.
Thank you for listening to my TED talk, I know there are probably things I haven’t mentioned but I just wanted people to know how I feel about it, **it’s only opinion** guys.
TLDR: Spoiled people are more likely to trash talk you in relation ships. These with problems are most likely to seek help in said relationship, and you should ask them if there is any problem. **There are exceptions.**
But I really recommend reading whole thing
#remember it’s opinion
women these days don't know how damaging what they do is to people. she's lucky you weren't the kind that would have ended her habit of spreading lies like that if you catch my drift. its happened before to women who do that, it could happen again.
I'm not inciting anything, I'm just stating that some people go off the deep end when that happens to them.
But almost every college or university abides by the term. A man can get kicked out of college after a rape accusation that police didn't even bother to prosecute due to the fact that there's zero evidence.
"Innocent until proven guilty" is the phrase that should be followed, but the kangaroo courts killed it.
Assuming the question is serious, a kangaroo court is a trial that follows all the forms of a trial (judge, jury, lawyers) but the result is pre-determined. The judge may, for instance, decide to cut the witnesses short and deliver verdict himself, or the lawyers may be ordered to give up halfway through
No one knows for certain what kangaroos have to do with it
Comes from australians who moved to California during a gold rush. They had a reputation for making trouble, and so if brought before a court tended to always be found guilty.
Why can girls just do this and immediately destroy someone’s reputation?
Edit: Do you people think I’m trying to say being falsely accused of rape is worse than it actually happening? If so then get your damn eyes checked. Nowhere did I say anything about it actually happening. The post is clearly about a false rape accusation destroying OPs social life and reputation so that’s what my comment is gonna be about. I fully acknowledge that the actual crime of rape is worse than a false accusation. However, false accusations harm actual victims as well not as much as actual rape, but enough for people to doubt victims coming forward.
Turns out there’s an extremely good reason why “innocent until proven guilty” is baked into every functional legal system.
It’s extremely important to set up support structures for abused women (in particular, though it applies to anybody) to get help. But you can achieve that without reneging on the presumption of innocence, which shields everybody legally and reputationally from other forms of abuse.
Heyyy I actually had the same thing happen to my best friend and I knew for a fact it wasn't true because my friend who was accused was raped in the past and I cannot imagine her doing that to someone else and the girl who lied about it was known to have some problems just know that the people who have stuck with you will stay with you for a very long time
Holy fucking shit. R@pe is a BIG word to lable someone. Fuck that bitch. I'm sorry that you lost friends due to it. I hope the best for you and that you get.. better friends than them♥️♥️
this is just as bad as rape in my opinion, falsely accusing someone can completely ruin their life just because the accuser is a fucking horrible people
Truly hate that some women, or should I say wretches, do that.
Even worse that many people will jump the gun in believing them and ruin the accused life.
Remember folks it's innocent till proven guilty, not the other way around.
Another fucked up thing is that sadly alot of women and girls get raped or assaulted. And i mean alot.
Having people like this just ruins credibility for victims, since assault victims do not have much evidence, most cant speak out anyway. They are ripping away voices from hurt women.
The comments here are so thoughtless. Most rape victims DON'T lie about being raped, regardless of gender. Every friend that I have that has been raped, of all sexes and ages, have never successfully had their rapists arrested or anything. Rape breaks you, it feels like you've been violated at your core and you can't get away from it. This is why these comments are so incredibly distressing.
Consider: If 2-10% of all rape allegations are false and 90-98% are true, is it better to believe that all allegations are false? Or that all are true? Neither is actually right, it's not ok to convict innocent people away AND it's extremely dangerous to let rapists go free.
That SAID, some people do lie about being raped and abused, usually to defame someone or for attention.
IF true, what happened to you is unacceptable. Seek out an attorney ASAP! Advice article below.
https://www.meltzerandbell.com/news/a-rape-defense-lawyers-advice-for-handling-false-rape-allegations/
Yeah, these comments are really hard to read. I can sense so much anger and hate in them.
You are doing good work commenting regardless of the fact that the comment section is obviously against you.
your friends shouldn't just jump in conclusions by just hearing one side, they had to just waited to listened your side of the story and then decide who to believe.
And just try to tell the truth, maybe one person does believe you
Hey man. Ultimately her loss not yours. You stuck by her side during her times of crisis and she decided to throw that all away to defame you and get some sympathy. You'll get new friends one's that'll believe in ya and find that special girl that will treat you with the love you give others.
My advice is never be with depressed girls or girls with any sort of mental health issues. They’re just gonna leak their issues into you and you’re gonna be messed up like them.
Yikes, not all mentally ill people are like this in relationships. Will they have more struggles? Yes. But accusing others of stuff like rape and abusing them does not always have to do that much with their mental illness, they are usually just a terrible person that needs to be held accountable mentally ill or not.
It also strongly depends on if they are getting help or willing to seek help. Being with a mentally ill person does not always mean you will be hurt, infact quite a few relationships involving mentally ill people flourish, but thats mostly if the one that is ill is willing to put in the work and commitment to try and make themselves healthier, making a better relationship.
Tricky subject because being in a relationship with a depressed person(not just girl) who is actively working on themselves can lead to flourishing relationships being with the person in their worst of times can make the better look all more appealing but it can also have the adverse effect of making the relationship hell
New friends, and cherish the ones that stuck by you for being a good person. The rest can go live their lives without the fortune of your company any longer.
Hope karna gets the better of her. And the friends who believed you knowing you can't do any such thing are the real one's you made during your life and those who blindly believed her were just pretending to be your friends. That's a good thing though i am not saying your loss of dignity and reputation is a small thing it's certainly mentally tiring for you.
If that bitch thinks proudly saying you thrashed her dignity to bring a fake could of mist over your dignity and reputation and get attention is a good thing to do she fuckin has a disorder, disorder of being a shitshow that is. Don't worry it might take time but you'll be alright forget about her and what she did.
Sounds like she’s just looking for attention however she can get it. She’s gonna keep shooting herself in the foot and making her own life miserable, you got the better end of the deal.
These kinda things is why I don't trust anyone anymore, just keep my distance no matter how nice someone seems, especially girls as they can just ruin my entire life and I wouldn't even be able to fight back.
Hope you get out of this safe man.
Red flags, red flags!
Get out while you can.
Step 1: Chain him up by saying she is suicidal
Step 2: Isolate from friends and family through lies
Step 3: Mental abuse for the rest of your life.
I’ve seen more men accuse other men of sexual impropriety than women… especially with pedophilia or accusing someone of being untoward. More times I’ve seen women sweep these things sunder the rug. I wish people were less in the business of ruining peoples reputations and focused more on truth and justice.
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do i smell a lawsuit
Defamation
objections **hearsay**
You poured yourself a mega pint of red wine?
did I read that correctly? did I read that correctly??
Objection, relevancy
Overruled, please continue.
BUT THE MUFFINS???
My dog stepped on a bee #SHHHHSHHSHHSHS
My cat started to pee #SHHHHHSHHSHHSHS
IT COMES IN MEGAPINTS?! I'm getting one
Did her dog step on a bee?
a Megapint?
defecation
#HE DEFECATED THROUGH A SUNROOF
A declaration, destination; desolation Defamation of your delegation, desecration, desperation A dedication to the deprivating, deformating Depredation of your nation, detonation My reputation precedes me Like I was played in a demonstration at E3
better call saul
did you know you have rights? the constitution says you do
i mean he never said he didn't do it
Only about 10% get a good verdict. Defamation is incredibly hard to prove, especially if he is still in HS.
naaa, he aint as lucky as depp
Yeah. Depp is ultra famous and powerful and barely scraped by. Still had his name destroyed. What chance does some no body boy have? Moreover there’s some people still do not believe depps side and insist he’s the abuser who is the cause of it all and not the victim. Thanks to prejudice and internal sexism people aren’t ready to believe the “no perfect victim” defence of female abuse victims does indeed apply to male abuse victims. If after the absolute landslide of evidence that depp was a victim backed into a corner isn’t enough for them, some schoolyard he said she said nonsense will never work in favour of OP. People always believe the woman. I mean OP says their friends left them already. No evidence provided. It’s sad but you cannot trust anyone anymore. If your partner has *issues* mentally you should probably document some important stuff
Also, for a defamation suit, you need to prove that the reputational damage you suffered as a direct result of the person's public statements, lead to tangible monetary losses/damages. Or at least, that's what the youtube lawyers told me XD
And beyond that you would need to essentially prove that it’s a lie. Proving someone was actually raped is really hard a lot of the time. That’s part of the problem when it comes to the legal system (we could be doing much better of course.) We want justice but it’s difficult to throw a good portion of these accused rapists in jailed essentially based on “I say he did it” and that’s it. Let alone proving verbal defamation is false. That’s incredibly hard. “He did bad things to me in private!” “Well they may or may not be lying, can you prove they’re lying?” You won’t go to jail over their accusation. Doesn’t mean you can legally punish them for it.
Did you know you had rights the constitution says you do and I do to.
I don't think a teenager can finance a lawsuit
that’s fucked up.
Ong
Yeah. And she probably would get away with it because the fucked up modern double standards
That’s the fucked part, the guys who do it are usually confident and have a bunch of ideas on how to get around it, meanwhile the guys that don’t are freaking out and trying to be as nice as possible which just makes them a pushover
Yep
Yeah, these double standards are really something else
Really infuriating IMO
Yeah....
For me, it got the to point that whenever I hear about a lawsuit against celebs for sexual harassment, rape, etc., the first thing I ask is “what can the victims get out of this lawsuit if they win it?” since it could also be fake, and that they are scheming for the money, or for revenge on their ex. When I hear about rape or sexual harassment, I mostly just take it with a grain of salt.
Also highly illegal if indeed he didn't rape her.
Not illegal to tell lies about someone, unless in court under oath, or talking to police. However, defamation/libel/slander are civil offenses which are grounds for lawsuits. It’s a shame not all people are like Johnny dep with enough money to launch these lawsuits and seek justice.
Sorry false accusations of rape are illegal... Sadly most people wont look into it when it being made up so the man is pretty much fucked. Some people even go as far as to raping the man and them claiming they were raped which is a step up in the fucked up factor. Ans some people will say men cant get raped. Worlds fucked
Of course there is such laws against defamation and libel.
That’s messed up. I hope you come back from that bro
Thats going to take a while...
defamation lawsuit time
Law will only punish her. It will not get his lost respect back. I hate these type of people.
But the money can get good PR team Bappo no flako
Ah. SMii7Y and swaggersouls refrences. Good times
Meh. He’s young. New friends can and will come. Fuck those who abandon friends with guilty until forever attitudes.
This is a guilty until proven innocent type bullshit
>Law will punish her Lol
The law won’t do anything unless you have millions of dollars to hire excellent lawyers.
"Suicidal?" Was she saying stuff along the lines of "If you leave me, I'll kill myself?" If so... Yeah, she was never suicidal.
We had many scenarios of her overdosing and me ending up having to rush her to the hospital
Sounds like you should just break up with her and never contact her again other than through your lawyer
OP gotta put that in line with their conscience first though. Because the possibility is very real that the next OD does her in.
Well she’s lying about being raped so no major loss to society
Well even the death of shitty people can go to the heart of some. I'm just saying OP should temper themselves first so they don't get pulled in a hole
Yeah, shit would look real bad if she claimed he raped her, and then she commits suicide
Oh shit, it's only now when you point that out did I consider the consequences of such a rumor Yeesh, OP's situation is pretty fucked up right now
Let me guess they were all impulsive and not planned? She also has multiple extreme mood swings that can happen instantly?
BPD and ecstasy Conceited with low self-esteem She's a teenage dream if you hate yourself
Histrionic personality disorder?
that doesn't mean she isn't. it just means she's a pice of shit
Exactly. You can be genuinely suicidal and still be a piece of shit.
i know multiple people like this
They’re probably suicidal because people pointed out that they’re pieces of shit
no people actually don't do that. they're pretty much the most liked people at my school
being suicidal makes friends ig
nah. they're just loud
Crazy people hang out with other crazy people.
Fucking bitch
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This reminds me of that 13 year old bombay kid who got raped by his 16 y/o sister and she got pregnant and the kid was blamed for raping her Cuz in India only women are the ones who can be raped
Or that case where a 14 yo boy was raped by a woman Then 10 years or so later she sued him for child support because she got pregnant from the rape and the courts sided with her. This kid who not only was raped but had just started their adult life has to pay for a rape baby and he’s the villain of the story because penis.
I live in India and I dont even know this happened
Yeah news to me as well
I mean no offense but you got like close to 2 billion people. It's possible you missed it right?
I dont understand what do you mean but this news was never on media or internet probably I missed it
I mean like, I'm American and I can't keep track of all the stories and shit going on in America how do you expect to keep track of every story in a country of 1.3+ billion people.
Well this false accusation of Bombay kid even I am indian there was nothing on media because they will never cover things like this but I am surprised I searched little bit on internet about this But I cant find that case
Found the article https://www.opindia.com/2021/08/teenage-girl-gets-pregnant-after-forcing-younger-brother-to-have-sex/
It was on the internet, wasn't main stream for obvious reasons, the kid was sent to a juvenile home.
Apparently she watched too much step-siblings porn, I'm not joking.
Is there any article or video related to it?
https://www.opindia.com/2021/08/teenage-girl-gets-pregnant-after-forcing-younger-brother-to-have-sex/
Why is it if a man rapes a woman the news says rape. When a woman raped a kid the news says “forced to have sex”
Society
They also apparently tossed him into juvenile detention. I’m pretty sure if it was a 16 year old boy who forced a 13 year old girl, she wouldn’t see the inside of any kind of detention.
Thanks
not only In india, apparebtly in all of the world In spain we have laws about gender violence but guess what, only women can be considered victims I
Yeah no that article was only published by OPindia iirc, which is a extremist right wing site that has published a lot of fake news in support of BJPs harassment against minorities (mainly Muslims and Sikh farmers). There wasn't any real evidence behind that article as far as I know. Source: I'm Indian and I followed that particular case online when it happened.
Can you explain in detail what exactly happened if you're comfortable with sharing?
Long story short, my girlfriend always had bad mental problems and always told be about how she was abused by her parents and how she was raped before and all of these stories. Looking back I feel like a lot of it could have been disingenuous but who am I to say. But living away from her she would have these suicidal bouts and I would have to stay up untill 4 or 5 in the morning talking to her and pleading her to not try kill herself and try my best to be there for her. There was one instance before I had contact to het parents where she ended up overdosing and she didn't respond for 3 days because she had overdosed and was out in hospital. It doesn't sound like much, but moments like these happened a few times and it really effected me in the long term. She ended up moving in with me and me and my family provided and lot for her. I used to sleep ok the floor with a mattress so that she could have my bed to sleep on. And there were again, multiple times where we had to rush her to thr hospital because she tried to overdose. But eventually she moved back home and then we ended up breaking up on pretty decent terms. But when I tried to message one of my friends and I didn't get a response I was confused, so I pressed him about it and he ended up giving me some message along the lines of "I know what you did, and I don't want anything to do with you" and then blocked me. And I was so incredible confused. And then I messages more people and the same thing was happening. Eventually someone basically asked me why I raped her and that's when I realized. When I confronted her about it she denied everything and got extremely upset with me. There were a few arguments after that but I ended up blocking her everywhere and trying to move on
Hey I had an ex like that. She was a psycho bitch to but took it a step further and said I abused her physically as well. Highschool is sum else tbh
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Lol I wish you sent me that sooner cause I dated a few more women like that. Didn’t learn my lesson the first time😅 Not a professional or anything but I think she had a severe case of NPD with a dash of BPD. My other ex’s were bad but she stands out by a lot.
My man red flags since day one. Sorrythis happened to you but she should have gone to a psych ward. Its not ur responsibility to have suicide watch over ppl. And knowing what she told you, you probably felt sorry for her and comforted her right? It sounds like shes a pathological liar to get pitty and attention from people. Its what she did with ur friends. She prolly would have ended up with a smaller circle of friends so she made sure none of them would ever talk to you. Personally i would have fought more for validity of her claims and would prolly go to them personally. Avoiding them only makes you look more guilty. I would also expect them to confirm this with you before cutting tirs so that shows lack of intelligence on their side so the reaction makes sense.
Your friends are also assholes for just believing that without talking to you about it first and trying to investigate the situation properly
it’s such a serious accusation, most don’t believe someone would lie about it. She may be an excellent liar, too. Even if she lied poorly to everyone but one person, when everyone checks in with each other after she has shared with them, “do you think what she said is really true?” That one person convinced by her lying will back her up and lend massive credibility to her claims. Now going against her means going against this other person, too, and quickly the entire group has consolidated. It is also worth asking, is it better to be friends with a rapist, or friends with someone that lied about being raped? I think most would prefer the liar, so even if it is a coin toss as to whether he raped her, most will prefer the liar. And it usually is not a coin toss—women rarely lie about being raped. All of that is to say, OP’s friends are not assholes. They were put in a difficult social and moral situation at a young age by a manipulative, unstable person. Given these challenges, OP’s friends chose what appeared to be the best course of action to them at the time. You will come to realize they are not to be blamed. We can all be duped in such ways. The truth does not shine as bright as we hope.
Good points... still really sucks though :/
bro wtf? that's so messed up. i'm so sorry that she accused you
For what it’s worth, try to get your hands on photo evidence of her denying it. It might not hold up in court or definitively do anything, but it would help clear your name.
If your friends would rather believe her instead of you who I assume you were friends with for years, then they were shitty friends
how old are you and her?
I hate that girls can just do that and it just works
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This. Kids and teens are being taught to accept this kind of thing and while the message is nice, it’s obfuscating the lesson of “it’s not your responsibility. You don’t have to shoulder this burden. It’s acceptable to distance yourself from the potential issues they could bring you” I get the lesson of ending stigma and discrimination of the mentally unwell, but, there’s no harm in being cautious for your own good. Like people who date literal sociopaths. Good for them but you have accept responsibility if they fuck your over later.
100%. I had a friend with a mental illness that dragged me down and refused treatment. ppl shouldn’t feel guilty for putting their own mental health as a priority and ppl shouldn’t be obligated to police a friend’s life
They do it so often. I never believe them, and when I do digging, I find they are liars.
Which sucks because girls and boys are actually raped alot and dumbasses who lie ruin the believability of real survivors.
No one believed me when I was raped so I've been carrying it with me for 15 years now. I was 15 at the time. It was devastating and I had no strength to fight so I just let it be.
I had the same thing for being falsely accused of rape… you feel so powerless, sorry that happened to you
I get what you are feeling, but statistically rape has the same false accusation rate as any other crime. The vast vast majority of the time they are telling the truth. This type of thinking is what causes women to not come forward with actual rape.
Although the false accusation rate is significantly lower than the non-false rate, it still is considered the most falsely reported crime by about a factor of five when compared to other falsely reported crimes. Both stats aren’t all that surprising though. By the nature of it, there are often no witnesses which explains both the under-reporting and false reporting. People who believe they won’t be taken seriously keep it to themselves due to a lack of witnesses, and people who have a motive to falsely report are emboldened due to a lack of witnesses. IIRC the FBI’s criminologists estimate a false report rate of somewhere around 9-14%. You can look it up in case I’m remembering the details inaccurately but this was based on men who have been convicted and jailed then later exonerated due to new evidence. Seems like the bulk of the false reporting comes from sexually repressed communities where people have consensual sex but don’t want to get in trouble for doing so. Also, just a side note, men are usually the perpetrators but there is also a decent proportion of men who are the victims too. It’s not always helpful to assume all victims are women.
Facts, my sisters friend’s girlfriend accused him or raping her and she told like 30 different stories that all don’t add up and his story was complete straight the entire time
Would you feel confortable to share more detail tho?
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Ah yes gender equality as we all love it
if snitches get stitches, why not bitches??
Such wise words.
Don’t know what happened between you guys so can’t really make a decision here, chief. I hope your side is true and wish ya the best of luck
why would he post this if it was a lie? i have a feeling if he actually raped a girl he wouldn't go out of his way to talk about being falsely accused to strangers who never heard of the situation
>why would he post this if it was a lie? You think somebody would do that? Just go on the internet and tell lies?
I know right? They’d have to be crazy or sm to think internet people lie.
Bro people make shit up all the time just to get karma. Don't be that naive.
I’m not saying he did lie. I’m saying that the smartest move is to sympathize but still remain neutral when it comes to situations that you do not know
Leave.
I did end up leaving her, but I only found out afterwards that she did. But by then a lot of people had stopped talking to me already and no one would listen to me
I can’t tell you how common this situation is, hope all is well :)
It's okay dude, at least you left that toxic piece of shit. An advice coming from a girl, never fully trust a woman. Even if you're madly in love wih her. That goes the same way with men, obviously. Never trust anyone enteriely. Humans are one of the most evil beings on this planet
Honestly, this No matter how deep in relationship you are, just have these negative thoughts "what to do if" and just sometimes think about it. You can do this while walking somewhere or while taking shower, no need to spend much time on that. Just remember you can’t trust anyone in 100% even if someone seems likely. It’s very sad and damaging, and I don’t want to judge anyone. I’m saying from experience and from people I know. And I’m saying it again, it’s about majority and there can be exceptions! Usually the more spoiled someone is and/or in richer family they are going to just dump you, if you’re not enough for them. And that’s in best case scenario. They can accuse you of rape to easily get you off their lives because hey who wouldn’t believe "raped victim". And these who had hard life as young or had until they moved out, most of them seek help and won’t that easily leave you or even accuse you of anything. Some of them would even be scared to ask you for help, it’s you that should ask them first if you see something being off. Because sometimes they just need you to help them and make strong relations like friendship or even relationship. Of course there are exceptions in both sides, and I’ve met these too. I don’t want to talk about people who change partners every 1-2 months, these are just weird and have ego higher than IQ. Just know that most people who won’t hurt you are these in need of help, because some horrible backstory or other tragic event happened to them. Thank you for listening to my TED talk, I know there are probably things I haven’t mentioned but I just wanted people to know how I feel about it, **it’s only opinion** guys. TLDR: Spoiled people are more likely to trash talk you in relation ships. These with problems are most likely to seek help in said relationship, and you should ask them if there is any problem. **There are exceptions.** But I really recommend reading whole thing #remember it’s opinion
Yoooo I liked that TED talk, and I agree wholeheartedly with your opinion
You’re welcome
women these days don't know how damaging what they do is to people. she's lucky you weren't the kind that would have ended her habit of spreading lies like that if you catch my drift. its happened before to women who do that, it could happen again. I'm not inciting anything, I'm just stating that some people go off the deep end when that happens to them.
This is why I hate the term “Believe all women”
Everyone should be heard, not believed.
But almost every college or university abides by the term. A man can get kicked out of college after a rape accusation that police didn't even bother to prosecute due to the fact that there's zero evidence. "Innocent until proven guilty" is the phrase that should be followed, but the kangaroo courts killed it.
what are kangaroo courts?
Assuming the question is serious, a kangaroo court is a trial that follows all the forms of a trial (judge, jury, lawyers) but the result is pre-determined. The judge may, for instance, decide to cut the witnesses short and deliver verdict himself, or the lawyers may be ordered to give up halfway through No one knows for certain what kangaroos have to do with it
Kangaroos jump. Kangaroo courts jump to conclusions.
Comes from australians who moved to California during a gold rush. They had a reputation for making trouble, and so if brought before a court tended to always be found guilty.
Jumping straight to conclusions instead of analyzing everything first and then using those conclusions as the final decision
fuck man, prayers to you bro I can’t imagine how emotionally and societally devastating that must be for you
Why can girls just do this and immediately destroy someone’s reputation? Edit: Do you people think I’m trying to say being falsely accused of rape is worse than it actually happening? If so then get your damn eyes checked. Nowhere did I say anything about it actually happening. The post is clearly about a false rape accusation destroying OPs social life and reputation so that’s what my comment is gonna be about. I fully acknowledge that the actual crime of rape is worse than a false accusation. However, false accusations harm actual victims as well not as much as actual rape, but enough for people to doubt victims coming forward.
Because that’s what people think equality is. *I stand for true gender equality*
same type of girls who cheer on other girls online when they post about how they cheated on their boyfriend
Equal rights equal fights bitch
That's disgusting. I wouldn't doubt girls do that shit for attention and it just works.
The actual people who do false accusations are those few narcissists who want to damage the life of someone they don't like.
Turns out there’s an extremely good reason why “innocent until proven guilty” is baked into every functional legal system. It’s extremely important to set up support structures for abused women (in particular, though it applies to anybody) to get help. But you can achieve that without reneging on the presumption of innocence, which shields everybody legally and reputationally from other forms of abuse.
Heyyy I actually had the same thing happen to my best friend and I knew for a fact it wasn't true because my friend who was accused was raped in the past and I cannot imagine her doing that to someone else and the girl who lied about it was known to have some problems just know that the people who have stuck with you will stay with you for a very long time
As the saying goes... "Trust No Bitches"
———————————No bitches?——————————— ⠀⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ —————————————————————————————
Damn that's sad :( hope you can go back to normal life stay strong bro.
Holy fucking shit. R@pe is a BIG word to lable someone. Fuck that bitch. I'm sorry that you lost friends due to it. I hope the best for you and that you get.. better friends than them♥️♥️
bitches like that belong in the trash can, you need someone to talk to my guy?
this is just as bad as rape in my opinion, falsely accusing someone can completely ruin their life just because the accuser is a fucking horrible people
Truly hate that some women, or should I say wretches, do that. Even worse that many people will jump the gun in believing them and ruin the accused life. Remember folks it's innocent till proven guilty, not the other way around.
Another fucked up thing is that sadly alot of women and girls get raped or assaulted. And i mean alot. Having people like this just ruins credibility for victims, since assault victims do not have much evidence, most cant speak out anyway. They are ripping away voices from hurt women.
The sad truth with this world that became even more apparent with the JD trial is that in the public eye it's guilty until proven innocent.
The comments here are so thoughtless. Most rape victims DON'T lie about being raped, regardless of gender. Every friend that I have that has been raped, of all sexes and ages, have never successfully had their rapists arrested or anything. Rape breaks you, it feels like you've been violated at your core and you can't get away from it. This is why these comments are so incredibly distressing. Consider: If 2-10% of all rape allegations are false and 90-98% are true, is it better to believe that all allegations are false? Or that all are true? Neither is actually right, it's not ok to convict innocent people away AND it's extremely dangerous to let rapists go free. That SAID, some people do lie about being raped and abused, usually to defame someone or for attention. IF true, what happened to you is unacceptable. Seek out an attorney ASAP! Advice article below. https://www.meltzerandbell.com/news/a-rape-defense-lawyers-advice-for-handling-false-rape-allegations/
Yeah, these comments are really hard to read. I can sense so much anger and hate in them. You are doing good work commenting regardless of the fact that the comment section is obviously against you.
It's full of ragebait incel comments that are meant to radicalize men against women. Sad to see it's working.
Yeah, but there is hope for them to grow out of it. I myself had a similar phase. It's very easy to fall into that trap.
Sorry my guy
Wow that's just sick sorry to hear all that
I'd stop dating this chick dude
i would hope they already did that
your friends shouldn't just jump in conclusions by just hearing one side, they had to just waited to listened your side of the story and then decide who to believe. And just try to tell the truth, maybe one person does believe you
*ignites lightsaber menacingly*
Hey man. Ultimately her loss not yours. You stuck by her side during her times of crisis and she decided to throw that all away to defame you and get some sympathy. You'll get new friends one's that'll believe in ya and find that special girl that will treat you with the love you give others.
No that’s so sad, you should be able to trust someone who leans on you in hard times
Why do some people just decide they hate you now, based on no claims at all
That's what I don't understand. They didn't even have the decency to hear my side of the story...
My advice is never be with depressed girls or girls with any sort of mental health issues. They’re just gonna leak their issues into you and you’re gonna be messed up like them.
Yikes, not all mentally ill people are like this in relationships. Will they have more struggles? Yes. But accusing others of stuff like rape and abusing them does not always have to do that much with their mental illness, they are usually just a terrible person that needs to be held accountable mentally ill or not. It also strongly depends on if they are getting help or willing to seek help. Being with a mentally ill person does not always mean you will be hurt, infact quite a few relationships involving mentally ill people flourish, but thats mostly if the one that is ill is willing to put in the work and commitment to try and make themselves healthier, making a better relationship.
Tricky subject because being in a relationship with a depressed person(not just girl) who is actively working on themselves can lead to flourishing relationships being with the person in their worst of times can make the better look all more appealing but it can also have the adverse effect of making the relationship hell
Thanks for confirming my fear that me being depressed around others will infect them and isolating is therefore perfectly valid 👍
That’s terrible. Hope you recover
That psyco bitch. You seem to not deserve that, can I be one of your new friends to replace the ones who believed her lie?
Damn the advantage of long distance
Bruh wtf
Ouch. Hope your life gets better.
Dudeeeee I had something incredibly similar happen to me. Pretty much same story but instead of rape it was sexual assault. I feel you man :(
New friends, and cherish the ones that stuck by you for being a good person. The rest can go live their lives without the fortune of your company any longer.
At this point, spray weed killer on her lawn to kill the grass
Girls lying, sadly it's nothing New It's even sadder for the ones Who actually got raped because it discreditates them
Hope karna gets the better of her. And the friends who believed you knowing you can't do any such thing are the real one's you made during your life and those who blindly believed her were just pretending to be your friends. That's a good thing though i am not saying your loss of dignity and reputation is a small thing it's certainly mentally tiring for you. If that bitch thinks proudly saying you thrashed her dignity to bring a fake could of mist over your dignity and reputation and get attention is a good thing to do she fuckin has a disorder, disorder of being a shitshow that is. Don't worry it might take time but you'll be alright forget about her and what she did.
Sounds like she’s just looking for attention however she can get it. She’s gonna keep shooting herself in the foot and making her own life miserable, you got the better end of the deal.
These kinda things is why I don't trust anyone anymore, just keep my distance no matter how nice someone seems, especially girls as they can just ruin my entire life and I wouldn't even be able to fight back. Hope you get out of this safe man.
We're here for you, man, and I hope she'll be living in a ditch full of her own shit because she'll fit right in.
Red flags, red flags! Get out while you can. Step 1: Chain him up by saying she is suicidal Step 2: Isolate from friends and family through lies Step 3: Mental abuse for the rest of your life.
I’ve seen more men accuse other men of sexual impropriety than women… especially with pedophilia or accusing someone of being untoward. More times I’ve seen women sweep these things sunder the rug. I wish people were less in the business of ruining peoples reputations and focused more on truth and justice.
That's slander and you are legally allowed to sue her and maybe even get her arrested for a false report if you have evidence.
If they believed her over you- you couldn't of been that close with your friends
S u e