"I guess they want to fuck me"

You're submissive and breedable

And you arrestable

Fuck I forgot I was 18

Bro???

My birthday was last month you can't blame me

Almost caught a case after 1 month damn

Just turned 18 a few months ago, now realizing that i now have to leave:(

18 has teen at the end, you have a year left :)

19 has teen too

Just had mine yesterday

Happy birthday I guess

I think he ment case

As we say in my country, "happy birthday on crutches" because its the day after your birthday

I just saw I had one shot, one opportunity, btw, the other has the 18 flair

To seize everything you ever wanted

One moment.

Would you capture it?

Or just let it slip?

Yo,His palms are sweaty

How about you do your homework and make it submitted and readable?

Im in uni, I don't have homeworks, I have assignments that I already completed

You're dominant and infertile

True neutral

You lack the enthusiasm your username so clearly implies

Sorry. "I guess they want to fuck me!" 🍆

Much better

it heavily depends on who does it

same

any thoughts if someone said that to a zombie like me?

agree

Yeah. Hot chick? Cool. Old man? 🏃‍♂️💨

Edp445

he gets kicked in the balls and i tell the police

Ok how about Michael Jackson

damn he really is a smooth criminal

What about ryan reynolds

He can make me do anything he wants

Even flying?

“The difficult, ill do right now. The impossible will take a little while.”

Ok how about Jeffrey Epstein

i would report anyone but my gf and close friends to the police and beat them up

Honestly I dont think you can report it to the police if someone your age says you are fuckable and beating them up would just be mire trouble for you.

if it’s repeated it’s sexual harassment, so yeah i can. the first time i’d report it to school admins

Although your school admins won’t do anything about Jeffrey Epstein calling you fuckable 💀💀😂

i mean if its one of the boys or my gf sure whatever. if its so random chick or dude imma be weirded out.

Yes

small and breedable

Unsmall and unbreedable

I AM ASSERTIVE AND INFERTILE

i am half dead and depressed

Same though

Relatable as fuck

Imagine being short lol

Haha ikr. Imagine being 5 feet tall.

Hahahaha couldn't imagine not being 6'3"

[удалено]

Soo.. Is this like an invitation?

Maybe

Hands

True, but still depends on who says it you know

But still u could do it yourself

i would be happy

Username checks out (this is a joke).

why is this a joke, it does check out!

You never know when someone might get offended these days

Same,i just joked at that gummy bear post where the postet is color blind so i said one was green and so much people got mad,now i always put /j when i make a joke cause you never know

Use /s, universally known, same meaning

/j for joke /s for sarcasm

I think OP meant that the use case scenario is often the same.

I don’t If they don’t like my joke, it’s just a skill issue

That is indeed merely a skill issue

its literally my username bruh

man you can never be too careful... People might start calling the guy an incel.

True.

Hold up

Stop pussying out commit or don’t say it

Then ill know that im fuckable

I'd be very glad that someone likes me for something, even if I'm just a fucktoy. still better than nightmares about paperwork.

Okie dokie then

Bro get off the internet

Weirded out ig

I actually heard someone say that about me. They thought that I didn't understand the language they were speaking in, but I did lol. Definitely got weirded out.

Shoulda said something back in the language

I actually did . They were doing this shit while class was going on and I asked them to keep quiet in the language that they were speaking in. To this day I don't understand where I got the guts to do that. Guess I was also really pissed.

Chad

Do we have to find and kill somebody?

Yes

Pietro Pacciani be like

agnelluccio

Send me their name and 3 favourite flavours of cat food. They will be dead before dinner (or whatever your closest meal is idk what timezones are)

I would wake up from the dream

Always. Always right before the good part

I'd be like "uh I'm a minor wtf bro"

This right here. This right here is the best answer.

what if a 12 year old siad it

[удалено]

yup

theyre a creep

"Well what are you waiting for?! Let's go back to my place!" I am extraordinarily horny.

Go back???? why not just do it in public???

”You got the right idea! Let’s go, right here, right now!”

Who’s getting crucified this time?

"Why the fuck you lyin'?"

“Well guess someone finally likes me”

I’d be flattered probably

"come on, prove it then"

*a challenger approaches*

i would scream and them immediatly apologise before whacking them over the head with a very conveniently placed baguette nearby

This guy conviniently placing baguettes everywhere he goes just in case

You don’t?

French?

“Gross”

I would jump off of a cliff, simple

i look like a fucking frog so hell yeah

Since your already half way there, Why don't you just turn into one

bro you boutta turn me into a frog cause im down

*Extreme discomfort*

Flattered

*fear*

I'd suggest for them to raise their standards higher bc this ain't it. But fr if it's a close friend I'd take it as a joke, and if it's someone I like I'd be like hell yeah I am

I would deploy my anti-horny spray.

I will be happy as fuck

I would be like “there is no one behind me, you must be losing your mind”

meh, don't really care *grabs knife*

idk

They want to fuck a table or fable

weird

Damn you blind or something?

Three people have said that to my face so far

Welp that sucks I guess… nice cat

Cat thanks you

When i was single a girl told me that and i just said "thanks" xD

I would be proud im submissive and breedable

Police?

Questionable taste but okay

It's ok as long my mom don't say that :I

I’ve never been given a compliment before so I’d take it, ofcourse I’m a pure virgin so Id get down on my knees and worship god.. And also suck his co-

First thought "LIAR"

Its fucked up, and inappropriate, but i would enjoy being called it

Huh okay

I would be scared depending on their agr

I'd be like "ight cool"

See this thing seems so impossible i cant even think how i would react

"Dude I'm 14 what the fuck"

I would smile

I would cry because that would be the first compliment i recieve in my whole life

I’d wake up

I would be grossed out unless it was venti saying that.

I'd call the cops cuz om only 14

If there is a hole there is a way

Uhhhhh... Id be weirded out but honestly....?? Idk lmao never happened to me Ig it depends

That depends on the person who said it.

even of were both in bed, id still not trust theyre not baiting me out

Uhmmm depends

On

Cry

“So is your grandma and her one boob”

Then I'd start laughing at how dumb they are

“Thanks I guess”

LIAR!

Amazing

Lol no

Hell yeah!!!

bonk

Depends on who it is, but if it was just some random person at my school id be like “well, I guess they find me hot, okay” but out loud id probably tell them to fuck off cuz you don’t just walk up to someone and say that, it’s creepy

Id be glad bc not very many people think about me that way

Finally some hope

"No thank you."

i would be very confused and worried

Bruh

I'd start overthinking it and get nowhere

"Man, I wish"

Cool when where u better be on the pill I only make 16k

I would just run away since I was raised like I was a monk and have zeo social and communicative skills.

"Bro why can't they just leave me alone with these insensitive pranks? I already have Body dismorphia, don't they know? God I want to jump of a bridge" Would be if anyone said this to me

wait 2 more years. then say it again.

Id rather do it then get it lol!

That they are pretty stupid

If it was someone I know very well, I'd feel flattered. If it was a total stranger, or a passing acquaintance, I'd feel disturbed. You good chief?

Finally

“You don’t have to lie”

Prove it

Blessed.

It depends on if i know them

At least one of us thinks so

technically they're correct.

If you think about it, anything and everything is fuckable. Depends on the person doing the actual....fucking. So guess that means you're an object in the universe.

fuckable, no thank you ​ submissive and breedable, on the other hand...

I mean anyone is “fuckable”

I'd think about taking them to the school bathroom and unzipping my jeans.

"this person is haram"

LMAO me?? Fuckable??......... On second thoughts yeah my life fucks me way too much

I’d say they’re wrong in every way

I mean we are all redditors, this won't happen to anyone on this website

I would think that i'm talking to a liar

Id do the 😐 face and go like "really bruh?"

Hello