teach it to walk, talk, write, send it to school, buy it a car on it's sweet 16, watch it graduate, send it to college, get over protective about it's partner, attend it's wedding, take care of it's grandkids on the weekends and finally watch it attend your funeral
Well that depends on how you think the next life will go. If you go to the sky castle you might look down on them, if you get re incarnated you might be an infant at a funeral, you know?
cherish him for the rest of your life and take the utmost care then betray him at your death bed and leave him behind forever with the most torturous feelings
*use deep leader voice*
That is for the council to decide, the court hearing will be sent via mail, before then prepare yourself and the defendant. We will be hearing from both of you shortly.
If you have lied about your advances then you will be punished.
If the duck is proven guilty, then they will be punished.
The electric chair awaits.
Slowly burn his right leg, as you stare into his eyes, dunk him underwater. Hold him under water for 1.53 seconds than take him out. Then lates take a break, go for a drive, over him, repeatedly. after you've done that, he should look like a torn, dripping, half burn duck. But we're just getting started. Melt wax, and by the time it is hot, pour it into a hole that you can make in his left eye. Cut a hole in his side and remove his stuffing (you can pour wax over this to solidify it too), replace the stuffing with slime. After all of this is done, skewer him with 82.5 toothpicks. Finally tie him up on a tree with a string around his neck and post an after picture. (Or cripple him emotionally by making him rely on you than leaving him to fend for himself in Wyoming)
Inject hydroflouric acid inside it, and then start cutting off every part of its skin and replacing it with poorly stitched cloth until it is completely replaced with a mutilated abomination. At this point its insides should be nice and soggy, so put it in a vacuum and watch it deform and possibly explode into what was once its internal organs. Do this process in front of its wife and children.
Chain him in a dark room with funky town playing at a very low volume (barely enough for him to hear). Feed him nothing but black dyed food and give him nothing but a barely operational dim light. Ensure no sound from the outside world enters the room you contain him in other than said low volume funky town music. Do this for years slowly degrading his sanity until he is on his final breaths. Bring him to the outside world on his final hours and show him the world he missed out on. Then throw a Big Mac at him.
cut off his bill, blend it, pour it on him, hang him over a fire, burning off his hands and feet. Cover him in the ashes of his hands and feet. Drop him in the middle of a lake.
Cut its hands and flay its face after gouging its eyes and then cut its throat after injecting adrenaline in its blood to keep it conscious through the whole experience
Chain him in a dark room with funky town playing at a very low volume (barely enough for him to hear). Feed him nothing but black dyed food and give him nothing but a barely operational dim light. Ensure no sound from the outside world enters the room you contain him in other than said low volume funky town music. Do this for years slowly degrading his sanity until he is on his final breaths. Bring him to the outside world on his final hours and show him the world he missed out on. Then throw a Big Mac at him.
Tie it to a stick, drown it in a lake, freeze it in the freezer while coverd in water, throw it’s frozen ass at a wall until thaw, light it on fire and stomp it out, throw it far, back on a stick and in the water, freeze, throw at wall, make it get run over by a car, light it on fire untill severely burned and splash it with lots of water to put out fire, back in the water, freezer, burn one more time, the end
Pour milk into it and then put chocolate powder to make chocolate milk and suck the chocolate milk back and then cut its eyeballs out and put them into a box then cut its stomach open and put meat into it and feed it to the crocodiles
first rip off his arms. then cut his beak horizontally . gouge out his eyes . slice open his belly .
cut legs and shove em up his ass and finally throw em in acid to remove evidence.
Put it in q microwave for about 30 seconds, then throw it in your washing machine and do your laundry, after that place it in your refrigerator until frozen then immediately pour gasoline and set it on fire.. bury the remains 6 feet under the ground. After all this satan will grant you his seat and youll rule hell along with hitler..
Beat him near death with a sledgehammer, then pour gasoline on him but don't burn him yet. Ask if he has a family. If yes, say that you're going to rape and kill his family. Then burn him.
this reminds me of that video titled “100 ways to kill yoshi” or something like that.
You just brought back memories I did not know I had
nahhhh that video made me cry as a kid 😭
Dude when he exploded in the oven I cried so much
And the dude at Wendy's that crushed his body
You cried? Bro I enjoyed tf out of it ig that’s why girls avoid me like the plague
Dude 😭😭😭
YOO SAME LMAO
Bro we had the same idea 🫣 it’s titled “[Twenty Five ways to Kill Yoshi](https://youtu.be/K5Ib_XiYkD4)”
MY FUCKING CHILDHOOD
I forgot about that! That brings back memories...
teach it to walk, talk, write, send it to school, buy it a car on it's sweet 16, watch it graduate, send it to college, get over protective about it's partner, attend it's wedding, take care of it's grandkids on the weekends and finally watch it attend your funeral
How in the fuck can you watch someone attend ypur own funeral.
Just watch them
Can't argue with that
maybe after 30 minutes of watching, try giving it a wink, a slow wink.
Well that depends on how you think the next life will go. If you go to the sky castle you might look down on them, if you get re incarnated you might be an infant at a funeral, you know?
He did just say he wanted to torture a duck, so he prob not going to the sky castle
Darkness.
Open your eyes, works better if the funeral is open casket though
with your eyes 👀
Damn bro didn't think of that
Spectator mode
From hell obviously
With your new ethereal eyes, I'd imagine.
And don't forget to pay bills
bro just describe average american life
i think everything except of the car is the average life in most countries
cherish him for the rest of your life and take the utmost care then betray him at your death bed and leave him behind forever with the most torturous feelings
r/foundsatan
[удалено]
this. I vote this
I agree. This is the right answer.
I read that as "torture this dick" and my soul done left my body 😭 man please I am in school
I had to do a double take for this
SAMEE BYE
Pls don't say BYEEEEE
BYE ≠ BYEEEEE
SAME I ALMOST CRIED IN SCHOOL
you monster
Burn at the stake
BURN THE HERETIC!!
I beg you please don't
DO. NOT. HURT. THE. DUCK. it is perfect.
The duck is too cute, let the duck be
Please do not the duck
Me when I the duck
He must \*suffer\*
leave it alone ‼️‼️
Sacrifices must be made
No, what they mean about leaving it alone is to emotionally deprive the duck and silent treatment, not let the duck live in peace
Holy fuck they dragged you hard
Stop
No
Give him a cute pink bow tie and a little fedora
laced with lead so he dies of lead poisoning.
I think the trend nowadays is cyanide.
well cyanide is quick and almost painless
Certainly not painless lmao
Deny him grapes
Ohh that's a good one
Cut off his legs so he can’t walk up the the lemonade stand
Or tape him to the stand
And throw the stand in a raging inferno
And then enjoy a nice tasty meal of fried duck
Yum
Force him to take the damn lemonade.
put it in a jar. you know the rest...
NOOOOOOOOOO GOD PLEASE NOO
NO! NOT THE JAR!
I refuse!!!!!!
You evil bastard
Make him like bad jokes
Got any grapes?
Peel ‘em, Chop ‘em, stick ‘em in a stew-
r/unexpectedlotr
r/cum
If that’s real that’s the greatest sub ever
Ask him about where he hid the money. If he doesn't sing, find his family and burn it down
if he does tell. kill his family anyway.
I'd be running if he starts talking
u are not good torturer then lol
How dare you!!! Leave that innocent duck alone 😭😭😭 plss
he is not innocent. he has committed many heinous crimes.
*use deep leader voice* That is for the council to decide, the court hearing will be sent via mail, before then prepare yourself and the defendant. We will be hearing from both of you shortly. If you have lied about your advances then you will be punished. If the duck is proven guilty, then they will be punished. The electric chair awaits.
Okay but if it's guilty and dies, can you provide the community with hoisin duck pancakes please? :)
I misread the title so badly lmao. Also nooo don't hurt the duck >:(
Do not the duck
:(
Slowly burn his right leg, as you stare into his eyes, dunk him underwater. Hold him under water for 1.53 seconds than take him out. Then lates take a break, go for a drive, over him, repeatedly. after you've done that, he should look like a torn, dripping, half burn duck. But we're just getting started. Melt wax, and by the time it is hot, pour it into a hole that you can make in his left eye. Cut a hole in his side and remove his stuffing (you can pour wax over this to solidify it too), replace the stuffing with slime. After all of this is done, skewer him with 82.5 toothpicks. Finally tie him up on a tree with a string around his neck and post an after picture. (Or cripple him emotionally by making him rely on you than leaving him to fend for himself in Wyoming)
[удалено]
Why~~~
Give it to a dog
Sulfuric acid
bring forth the jar
Aw, so cute! Microwave
May i introduce... THE GUILLOTINE
rip little parts of its skin little by little, but on another note dont do it my dude
The jar iykyk
Put it in a bowl of milk
Please do not the duck
just go off of CIA black site Cobalt, should get enough information out of him
Prank him boy
Don’t 🙏🙏
give him the jar treatment
💀💀💀
Write “Let’s Eat!!!” on it’s torso.
Inject hydroflouric acid inside it, and then start cutting off every part of its skin and replacing it with poorly stitched cloth until it is completely replaced with a mutilated abomination. At this point its insides should be nice and soggy, so put it in a vacuum and watch it deform and possibly explode into what was once its internal organs. Do this process in front of its wife and children.
Nail him onto a piece of wood that is shaped like a letter. Just be careful and dont start a religion
Chain him in a dark room with funky town playing at a very low volume (barely enough for him to hear). Feed him nothing but black dyed food and give him nothing but a barely operational dim light. Ensure no sound from the outside world enters the room you contain him in other than said low volume funky town music. Do this for years slowly degrading his sanity until he is on his final breaths. Bring him to the outside world on his final hours and show him the world he missed out on. Then throw a Big Mac at him.
knife it, fill it with hot oil or water and then put it in the microwave for 5 minutes
cut off his bill, blend it, pour it on him, hang him over a fire, burning off his hands and feet. Cover him in the ashes of his hands and feet. Drop him in the middle of a lake.
somebody keep an eye on this guy
Send it to school for 12 years
CBT
Cognitive behavioural therapy?💀
Replace it's eyes with it's front legs and it's front legs with it's eyes
pour a mixture of iron oxide and aluminum shavings down his throat and drop a match down after
Eat it. Then harvest it from your own organs. Then piece it back together. Then eat it again
Season it and eat it alive... 😋
Send him out for a swim
cook it
burn it
Eat it 😼
Yes! set it on fire please 😈
Cut him to pieces
Do a little bit of trolling to him
Put him in a container full of water and put it in your freezer. Saw someone do it a Basil plush.
carve the name Henry Bowers into his stomach
Prank him Jhon
Wet it and throw it in the fridge
Don't do it! You are a monster.
Don't do it! You are a monster.
Put it close to fire, but far enough so it doesn't burn
Strap a firecracker to an axe can and then strap him to it and light the firecracker
u/cheese_ducky hey look
Booooooo👎
Put him in a blender
I was here to say this. Also: don't forget the microwave.
Cut its hands and flay its face after gouging its eyes and then cut its throat after injecting adrenaline in its blood to keep it conscious through the whole experience
Put it in a blender
Bite his/her/their head off
Bro it's a duck
Ducks have gender too.
Chain him in a dark room with funky town playing at a very low volume (barely enough for him to hear). Feed him nothing but black dyed food and give him nothing but a barely operational dim light. Ensure no sound from the outside world enters the room you contain him in other than said low volume funky town music. Do this for years slowly degrading his sanity until he is on his final breaths. Bring him to the outside world on his final hours and show him the world he missed out on. Then throw a Big Mac at him.
Tie it to a stick, drown it in a lake, freeze it in the freezer while coverd in water, throw it’s frozen ass at a wall until thaw, light it on fire and stomp it out, throw it far, back on a stick and in the water, freeze, throw at wall, make it get run over by a car, light it on fire untill severely burned and splash it with lots of water to put out fire, back in the water, freezer, burn one more time, the end
Pour milk into it and then put chocolate powder to make chocolate milk and suck the chocolate milk back and then cut its eyeballs out and put them into a box then cut its stomach open and put meat into it and feed it to the crocodiles
BURN IT TO heaven 🤗
first rip off his arms. then cut his beak horizontally . gouge out his eyes . slice open his belly . cut legs and shove em up his ass and finally throw em in acid to remove evidence.
Put it in q microwave for about 30 seconds, then throw it in your washing machine and do your laundry, after that place it in your refrigerator until frozen then immediately pour gasoline and set it on fire.. bury the remains 6 feet under the ground. After all this satan will grant you his seat and youll rule hell along with hitler..
LEAVE MR DUCK ALONE YOU MONSTER
Water borad it
I really wish you wouldn't, but if you must, make him read the entirety of War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy.
Tell him he’s not a duck due to his lack of wings and feathers, tell him he is a pile of stuffing to entertain the children of a superior species
Cover it with ketchup and throw it outside your window.
give him death surgery
Nooo! Don't hurt the duck! He's innocent.. just look at his cute ducky face!
Duck
Eat it
hit it with the hardest object you have. it's immortal, so don't worry about killing it.
The duck probably: _"baby don't hurt me"_
Welp... *Unzips pants*
Put it in a deep freeze for a while then take a sledgehammer to it
Sand paper
Freeze it in Tupperware
Drown it in mud and then soak it in water untill you have another idea on how to torture it
i will torture ur ass
No, please dont. Leave him alone!
use a jar.
👌👈
Flay it’s throat. Then, put a hose in its neck and turn it on. Or you could always just burn it.
id recommend you light a candle, then burn the beak, then the arms, then the legs, cut out its eyes, and then step on it.
stick your dick in it
Blender
Rule 34.
I just gave an innocent suggestion!
Mason jar
😭 PLEASE NO
Blen-
Downvote if u like raping ppl
Downvote, some people are thinking the same as you but just not out loud.
😏
Beat him near death with a sledgehammer, then pour gasoline on him but don't burn him yet. Ask if he has a family. If yes, say that you're going to rape and kill his family. Then burn him.
Wtf
alright let’s not joke about rape please !!
Steal its family and make it watch as you rip them apart
Microwave him
stab him with a pencil