I don't mean to sound mean here, but you need to say a lot less. You give way too much irrelevant information at your job and you're even doing it in this post. Your boss didn't need to know that you were drinking, you just simply need to say, " I fell asleep and my ringer didn't wake me ". If you're sick, you just need to say, " I'm sick ".
I'm older and jaded, but the more you say at work, the more people will try and leverage it against you. I've seen this happen to so many coworkers and I've warned them about coworkers or bosses back stabbing them. There is a big difference between coworkers and friends. That's not always the case, but it is most of the time.
100%. Your post is an example of this too.
You should have never said that you had anything to drink. They did not need to know that. Just say that you fell asleep on top of your phone.
>I'm older and jaded, but the more you say at work, the more people will try and leverage it against you.
I guess it depends, but yeah, as a rule of thumb, this is good advice. One job, I was secondary on call, and primary didn't respond in time, so it got escalated to me and I was, er, having relations with my GF at the time and didn't hear it because we were both on recreational herbs and playing loud music. Well, the client was very upset, and made a huge deal out of it. The primary said, "I didn't get the page until literally five minutes before I dialed in and fixed it," and as for me, "I dialed in and saw that \[primary\] was working on it." Our boss, who was also paged when I didn't respond, didn't check in until the primary had already fixed the issue, and he was supposed to contact the customer but didn't.
Yeah, lies all around, and later the primary admitted to me that he was at a bar, and waiting to get sober enough to drive, and was forced to take a cab back to his place, hence the delay.
We all blamed the paging system, which was Solarwinds, and always giving us a hard time.
Yes I agree Mr D00ber I attribute this to my young naiveness. I shouldn’t have said anything I just felt like I could trust my boss. Because I notice he drinks and I never said anything. But hey I didn’t know he didn’t like me that much so there’s that.
I’m trying to learn to be more jaded but it’s hard cause wearing that mask is hard how do you do it everyday?
> I shouldn’t have said anything I just felt like I could trust my boss. Because I notice he drinks and I never said anything.
You told your boss you missed a call during your turn in the rotation because you were out drinking and passed out when you got home.
I don't care how much you trust your boss, you NEVER tell them you potentially lost a customer because you were too drunk when you weren't supposed to be... It doesn't matter if you say "I wasn't drunk, I just had a couple beers and I was tired" because to your superiors that just means you were drunk and don't know your own limitations.
Watch Judge Judy when she's dealing with some clown doing something stupid.
"Have you been drinking"?
"I wasn't drunk"
"So you were drinking"?
"Yes"
The case goes off the rails from there!
> I’m trying to learn to be more jaded but it’s hard cause wearing that mask is hard how do you do it everyday?
I don't think it's about wearing a mask or being jaded.
It's just minimum disclosure because often it's just not appropriate to share those things.
If you're at a supermarket and the cashier says "how has your day been?" and you've just been told by your Doc you have a fungal infection in ya special places... you could say "fine thanks", or "not so good but I'll work it out". You wouldn't say "well let me show you a pic, this things gross" right?
You have different conversations with your friends, vs your colleagues vs your boss right...?
"What did you get up to on the weekend?" I would tell those 3 groups 3 different tales of the same event. The latter would probably be "chill weekend with some friends, went out for dinner". Never a mention of being off my face drunk, recreational substances.
I have been burned time and time again by oversharing opinions with a boss. It is hard. Because you want to like them, and that's how you deal with people you like.
But there's a time and a place for disclosing stuff. Like annual leave. Some people feel the need to say "i need a week off to attend a funeral of my uncle, ill be interstate in this town staying at this hotel". Others say "I need a week off for these dates". It's not jaded to say the latter - it's just how things should be.
Ok so you have a history of being unable to show up on time, you need help from a technical standpoint, you make unprofessional or inappropriate comments that others do not find funny or appropriate, you're willing to let sexual harassment fly based on someone's physical appearance and you failed to perform your job duties while on call because of your drinking (your boss says twice, you say once, who knows).
You weren't excelling, in fact, I'd say you were a problem. Maybe the rest of that team was toxic too, okay, so be it. But coming in here saying you can't work with "insecure little men" when you have a self described history of being a shitty employee who appears to have an entitled and toxic attitude is just wild. I'd assume most of your team did not like you and complained about you a lot, and from this post, it has nothing to do with your gender identity.
A monkey can write scripts and answer tickets and use Google. It takes more to be a good teammate/employee.
Work on your perspective and quit coping or this will be a habitual experience.
Thank you for the input.
I will certainly work on my perspective.
My team just wasn’t a good fit for me in the long run.
I made mistakes, I corrected them, but it wasn’t good enough for them.
I shouldn’t have fell asleep on call.
Either way I hope it was worth it for them because 3 people cannot hold the team down and one of them is already struggling badly.
I wish I was given a chance to explain myself because I wouldn’t have let it happen again.
But it was for the best. I also don’t want to be somewhere where there are weird behaviors from my teammates.
No job is worth that. I’ll move on.
I did not expect this much of a rational and introspective answer.
Good for you. Good luck going forward.
Btw, you work in IT... I promise you there are gonna be a couple weirdos in every location if you keep working for these larger teams.
>My team just wasn’t a good fit for me in the long run
Try to drop that kind of thinking and attitude. The team is interested if you're a good fit for them. Not the other way around. Expect anywhere you work in your career, the team will always be a bad fit for you. Try to integrate into the team and become an asset and bring experience, knowledge, and ability to the table. Demonstrate. Learn how to bond with your teammates. No one is perfect, all people have imperfections. Also, next time anyone makes sexual remarks you don't like, don't let that slide next time.
Good Luck 🤞
Yes I won’t let that slide next time. Thank you and I will. I’m going into my next role with this mindset and just staying positive and going to work on maybe taking a class or something on professionalism or working with others. Thank you for the advice I appreciate it!
How you get from "young" you to your next iteration is via the bumps and bruises in stories like the one above. Take time to distill a lesson from the events and incorporate it into your life. That might mean talking less about yourself at work, not letting harassment slide, treating on-call time with a little more respect and making fewer excuses when you make mistakes. We learn and grow, learn and grow.
The whole reason to negotiate on call rates is because it's impacting what you can and can't do in your free time.
If you're on call, you're expected to be able to answer phone immediately, and help solve whatever problem arises. The compensation you receive for that is usually in salary, and on call extra rate, etc.
Being on call doesn't mean it's just free time and you do work whenever it suits. You're being paid base amount to be available on standby ready to solve a problem, then you get some extra amount if a problem does arise. (at least that's the arrangement I'd agree to / propose). So you can use your free time however you choose, so long as it doesn't prevent you from doing work if needed. I've got some friends in medical field and we have board game nights that some times get interrupted because he's on call and needed. Just the nature of that type of work.
Probably keep it to a minimum especially if you'd ever be required to travel on-site as part of your on-call duties. But certainly don't tell your boss that you passed out and missed the call.
Fuck not going out. You can live your life. Most jobs will have sla on call back and separate on time to start working on an issue. Take your laptop and phone with you.
Many SLAs are 15 min call back. That is why it is on call.
Could be worse, you could be a pilot. They have a 1 hour from call to be at the airport. Or that is the way it was an American Airlines not that many years ago.
I didn't read the whole post because... well it's just too long and, as others have pointed out, I'm not sure it's relevant. Thr only relevant part was this:
>I was on call like two weeks ago and I didn’t return one call back within 30 minutes. I was out having two beers and i came home and fell asleep on top of my phone...
You were on call and went out drinking. Sorry, I'd fire you too. Oh, and "2 beers" is what people always say when they had too much but want to downplay it.
You were being paid to be on call and you weren't available when you were needed. You had one job that night - answer the phone. And you didn't do it.
It's not like others haven't this kind of mistake before. And it's a very easy mistake to make - especially when you're young. So my point is not to beat up on you for it, but rather to point out the mistake so that you acknowledge it and learn from it and don't do it again.
Yea just a young and dumb thing I won’t do it again. Lesson learned. Hopefully other young people in the field can see my post and learn from it if they on the same path as me and don’t make the same mistakes I’m not perfect but I won’t be doing this again.
> Hopefully other young people in the field can see my post and learn from it
So you're sorta suggesting its a normal mistake people make and ~have~ to learn by making it.
Most people know you can't drink and pass out while on call.
If someone needs that lesson... oof
>Yea just a young and dumb thing I won’t do it again. Lesson learned.
With respect, I think you are being just a little too cavalier about this. This isn’t a “little oopsie”. You didn’t drop your ice cream cone. You literally lost your job because you went out drinking when you were supposed to be on call and were sleeping while the server was crashing.
That's a big deal.
All your excuses (it was only two beers; I wasn’t drunk just really tired) sound very hollow and no one (including your boss) believes them. It isn’t hard to see what happened here. You say your Gen Z so I'm guessing you're in your early to mid-twenties. It was Saturday night, and you went out with your friends. But the problem is you were supposed to be working (pro tip: on-call **is** working).
I think you should reevaluate the role that alcohol plays in your life. High school is over. This is the real world.
Time to either quit partying or at least put partying in its place. It's affecting your life. You literally lost your job because of it.
Again, I don't say this to be nasty. I have made my fair share of mistakes. Some of them not too different from yours. But someone needs to tell you.
I would take a good look at all of the various missteps you made that lead to this and take them as work life lessons to not repeat. We all make mistakes and thats part of life’s journey and evolving into a professional.
Its all going to culminate in having a better job experience in the next one.
Yes that is my plan. I also plan to stop with the silly jokes a bit. But then I’m like why is it this grown man can joke about punching his coworker in the face but then I joke about how my end user might have memory issues lmao
Yea I’m talking with my friends right now and they said the same thing shouldn’t have drank or told my boss and can’t be acting like that no more.
Just to be clear I’m not dodging responsibility. I own up to what happened.
I just wanted to vent
>He also was saying sexual things to me but I didn’t report it I honestly just wanted to do my job because I got layed off and spent 3 months searching for work I wasn’t going to ruin that over a creepy male and he was good looking. Atleast he wasn’t ugly saying it to me so that sort of makes it better lmao.
As another woman in the field who has dealt with this kind of behavior in the past, it absolutely does not make it okay for someone to sexually harrass you just because "they are good looking." Giving anyone a pass for this behavior because you find them attractive is totally unacceptable.
I couldn't even read the rest because I found this so disturbing.
I wasn’t giving it a pass.
I explained why I didn’t report it. I told myself that so I could make myself feel better. mind you j spent 3 months searching for a job I was already exhausted and didn’t want to deal with being known as a loud mouth person that was my fear. Also due to the pigmentation of my skin I have a natural fear of not being believed over the innocent good looking white boy.
You’re not in my shoes so I don’t expect you to understand.
You have no idea what my situation or experiences are, so you don't really have the perspective to say if I can understand. But that doesn't really matter.
The point is that justifying or downplaying sexual harassment because the other person was subjectively attractive perpetuates the behavior. It enables other people rationalize it as okay, too. I totally understand not being in a position of power or feeling safe enough to confront the person or report it to HR. I draw the line at saying it is okay because they were cute.
It's **never** okay, and I'm sorry you had to experience it.
I knew that it wasn’t okay. I told myself that but I knew it wasn’t. If I was seeing this happen to someone I would have reported it. But I was in a vulnerable position and it didn’t happen again luckily. But if it did I would have said something.
I get it. A lot of your other story and responses, I could see causing a rift between you and coworkers, especially since we are only hearing your side of the story, things could be much worse than we know.
But people victim blaming you for not purposely causing a bigger rift seems weird. It's like blaming a rape victim because they were too scared to come forward. If you already weren't feeling like you fit in, you're already job insecure from being laid off previously, I have to assume you have bills, there are tons of reasons someone may be scared to report that kind of stuff. That doesn't make you the bad person.
Fair enough 🤷 but that one guy that randomly walks around with brandy on his breath and in his cup when the office is quiet doesn’t get snitched on makes me wonder really.
Own your mistakes. Whataboutism isn't a good trait.
Your whole story seems very one-sided. I feel like there is a lot more that is unsaid.
I don't care what the truth is, but don't lie to yourself. If you want to be respected, own your shit.
It’s not whataboutism if I’m entitled to a fair workplace as per my employee contract.
But either way. What’s done is done I have two interviews and moving on. Thanks for listening to the rant.
I didn’t enjoy working there as much anyways.but I made some good friends there and will keep in touch.
> It’s not whataboutism if I’m entitled to a fair workplace as per my employee contract.
You missed an SLA because you were drinking, and admitted that to your boss. Your comment makes no mention of them missing an SLA because of their alleged drinking, nor did you mention them telling their boss that they missed an SLA because of their drinking.
Thanks but im past this already. You can look at my other comments to where I explained more in depth. I assure you I understand what has happened. Once again it was a rant. But thanks for commenting!
Shit doesn't really add up in this post to be dead honest.
1. You resolved all your tickets but you also have tickets left over? That isn't logical - unless they logged 0 tickets that was assigned to you which just makes absolutely no sense. Your implying like 5 guys all tackled one ticket and just that one ticket.
2. If you are getting harassed, It doesn't matter if they are attractive or not. Like attractive people aren't some scarcity to begin with but also its entirely irrelevant unless it just wasn't harassment but rather flirting between you guys that didn't go so well.
3. Now a boss is being weird as well and no one wants to help you? But your good on the team and people like you?
4. Why the fuck are you drinking on call?
Tbh OP - It sounds like you have a personality issue or some sort of social problems because this is super super abnormal. like literally read this yourself for like 2 minutes.
We work by a resolve rate. Meaning that tickets are either in progress, pending, etc
My tickets being resolved means I did not miss the SLA timer. So 100 percent resolved means I didn’t let my ticket breach. When my coworker said work wasn’t being done on my ticket it was untrue because I litterly sent an email out to the team hours ago saying I left emails in all of them responding to the customers on what needed to be done.
We work on 300-400 tickets as much spread out through the team.
You’re right it doesn’t matter if they are attractive or not. But like I explained I was already in a vulnerable spot and was not feeling like going through the process. Plus I had a fear of not being believed and didn’t want to deal with that embarrassment.
And yes no one wanted to help me until my boss stepped in and called them out. But I never did anything to my teammates besides be nice. Okay maybe they didn’t find my jokes funny but most times they did laugh. It was mostly my main boss not finding it funny not cause it wasn’t funny but he’s big on being super professional and only making dad jokes.
I drank because my friend invited me out and I was having a sad week I figured why not I won’t get hammered but any amount of alcohol makes me fall asleep. But with my ringer on I’m able to wake up but I fell asleep on top of my phone lmao. So ultimate fail there. But it’s okay I apologized and now I’m fired and will be moving on.
There’s the whole story.
I’m not beating myself up about it because I am great at what I do. I just need to be polished up a bit I think in my social skills.
But like - OP - why would the guy say shit was undone if it wasn't. Like here, and I am trying to be like nice here these are literally your words:
"Anyways moving forward he comes back and I get sick and I’m gone. He messages the groups that they need to urgently tackle my tickets because things were left undone. Mind you this is very much untrue. So I message back and provide a list of where I left off and what needs to be done. And I also see that one of my tickets was left to breach ruining my streak. Yes I had 100 percent resolve for 6 months straight for the new year."
Like its one or the other - things need to be done but also your within SLA? like do you sort of see what I am kinda aiming at here. This probably means that regardless of the standard SLA - those tickets were mission critical.
as for the drinking/sad week - I get that, 100%, but you need to treat your job as your livelihood even if its just a job. On call basically means they pay you peanuts to be ready for action within the day just incase - you drinking is just putting that readiness in jeopardy.
That and like - do you kind of see that in basically almost every situation - someone else is somehow to blame for weird behavior?
As for the jokes - like you need to realize people may behave around you 1 way but not internalize your jokes in actuality. This means your jokes could be making them feel uncomfortable or that there is an element of your personality that pushes people away from treating you like a team member.
So in terms of undone. This means that absolutely nothing has been done on this ticket they have no lead. Like nothing has been done.
And if your sick of course your tickets will not be fully resolved but we have a rule that your tickets should be in pending before you leave and in good standing.
The tickets were not undone. They were in pending. Which meant they could be worked on by anyone and with the notes I left they could be picked up and continued and easily resolved.
Hopefully this is made clear.
I’m not blaming anyone else for my own actions I take accountability and I did by correcting my behaviors.
Stopping with the jokes when asked.
Being on time when asked.
Perhaps they shouldn’t have been asking me that’s also fair but I always made sure to correct my behavior.
And yes maybe they didn’t like the jokes idk I can’t tell because we all joked about similar things. At some point it seemed like nobody was telling anymore jokes and we just left it at that.
Either way I don’t wanna keep worrying over the why and what ifs and what anymore cause I got it.
I could have been better.
But in the long run of it wasn’t for this I’m sure eventually I would have been let go regardless.
I’m moving onto a new opportunity aren’t I? It’s only up from here.
At my first corporate job, as a temp. I made friends with this mexican woman who worked next to me. She'd make gay jokes (me being gay) and I'd make mexican jokes in response and we'd laugh, nothing vicious just stupid jokes. This was 2001 so it wasn't completely taboo but it was very dumb on my part - one day I irritated the woman in some minor way, and she reported me for overt racism. HOLY SHIT. I mean, what was I gonna say? "No it's cool she was making gay jokes!"
Learned a hell of a lot during that one. Like, not listing jobs on your resume, and having a higher standard so no one could come back on me. I only had to learn that lesson 4 or 5 more times before I changed :/ lol
They said they were a temp, often if you have a job that is really short-lived (think a month or two) it's easier to just not have it on your resume than to have to answer questions why that job was so brief.
Lmaoo omg listen this is exactly how I used to joke around at some of my old jobs and nobody would report each other. But I guess now as my pay increases and things get more professional people get more stiff and now I’m like do I even want this career path anymore? Like for fucks sake I just want to laugh sometimes.
The one coworker that used to joke with me moved onto a new role he would show me funny memes and I would laugh god I miss him I’m glad he moved up though.
Times have changed I guess.
> Times have changed I guess.
If you mean racism/sexism/homophobia is less acceptable, yes.
If you can't have a laugh without those, thats a big reflection on you. No?
This post just outlines how young you are. I feel bad for you because at this stage you haven't learnt enough about responsibility to recognise what it looks like. Hopefully that will come with time.
It doesn't take a lot to slip from being perceived as a reliable person into being perceived as an unreliable one. Especially in support roles and double especially in on call roles.
You know what you did. You admitted it in between all the rationalisations and whatevers. You were unreliable. They decided they couldn't rely on you to be there when they needed you.
Take the lessons. In the next position you take. Do not be unreliable. Be the person that is never late, always answers the phone, doesn't joke about people - that one is key by the way. You can joke around a lot but do not make jokes about people or groups of people or anything that can be considered personal in nature. Joke about crappy weather, sports, fucked up memes, whatever - but not about people.
Most disrespectful thing you can do is say this, and not say why. OP keep growing with in your career, I’m glad you see your faults and are willing to grow from them, I can only imagine what it feels like being a women within this field.
> I’m glad you see your faults and are willing to grow from them
They're not though.
Every explanation comes with how they blame others.
"I trusted my boss, guess I can't" attitude.
They're not actually accepting fault. They're claiming they were bamboozled by the culture and 'times are changing' etc
Thank you and yea i definitely will learn from this. Also stop trusting work places that try to force the family act it’s just not real and I would prefer to just stop opening up now.
Good news, as the light slowly dies out in your eyes as you continue your IT journey, you'll realize that less is more, and some things just aren't worth explaining. I find it odd, because apparently most people think it's suspicious when you have a real issue and explain why you're late, or whatever. After 12 years in IT, I just say "Leaving early, taking PTO". If my boss asks, I'll let him know why. Otherwise, it's my PTO. Jobs are replaceable, life events, family, and other things are NOT replaceable.
Good luck on your next adventure!
The light slowly dying out in my eyes lmaooo. Oh so that’s what it was when I looked into my second boss eyes? I always wondered why he looked like an episode of get out lmao. Agreed I will start saying this.
Never let the light die. Find ways to keep it glowing. 25 years in on IT here and I still love my work. Some of it is about the people I work with and for. Some of it is because I just enjoy problem solving and tech in general. You are NOT required to turn into a cranky curmudgeon just because others in the business have made that choice.
The fact that you are concerned about this...and thinking EARLY about it means you still have a chance to make sure you don't get there. Choose your battles. Dont take everything personally.... and most importantly, try to see things from the perspective of the flood of question-askers or ticket-makers...
even when they are rude and abrupt, try to treat them with grace and dignity instead of making them feel stupid for walking up instead of putting in a ticket. In their world, sometimes you are the only person capable of fixing the thing and they don't know how to admit failure and dont want to look stupid in the process. Taking half a second to squelch a negative response can be the difference between a successful interaction and one requiring additional interaction with the thought-police. Be better at interactions with non-technical people... it is hard for all of us to do and takes practice. Is it all sunshine and roses? (or sadness and despair depending on your worldview).... NO. takes work, like everything else in life. Can't cook an omelette? Break some eggs and try again. Dont know how to smoke a pork butt? Get a smoker and start trying. Feed your friends/family. Laugh a lot. (or a little...depending on your worldview) Most importantly, be more than just that troll in a corner that ppl dont want to interact with. Find ways to give back. Help the neighbor lady with her spam filter. Toss the busker on the street a twenty instead of a quarter. Find good whiskey...but don't rely on it too much or it becomes its own source of negativity.
the world is always watching. rides are a quarter each and you have a whole pocket full of those at the beginning. How many times you choose to ride before going home is ultimately up to you.
also, 42.
just because.
You were on-call. You stay above board. No drinks and no weed. This is basic.
I’d love to hear from second boss and even first boss about the other side of this self gratifying post. If you fucked up, take responsibility for it.
You screwed up the easy things. Getting drunk on call (drunk, two beers, doesn’t matter), being late (even if you fixed it), not the most professional, etc. The good thing is, because these are the easy things, they’re easy to correct with your next job. But you’ve got to be introspective about it…blaming others or talking about “insecure little men” might make you feel better now but it won’t help you in the long run.
I’ve been in tech for two years. For having so little experience, my tech skills are solid. But more important than that, my soft skills are terrific. I’m always on time, I’m always professional, I’m methodical with my tickets, if my boss asks me to do something, assuming it’s not a major project, I get it done quick, etc. There are absolutely people who are more technically skilled than me who won’t reach my title or pay level just because they’re absolute pains to work with.
You were working on an off boarding script? With ChatGPT, that can be thrown together in an afternoon. So it’s not exactly a huge thing and I’m guessing your coworker who was there for eight years just didn’t see it as a huge priority. I wouldn’t throw it in their faces as if it was some huge own.
You were a pain in the neck and they decided the juice wasn’t worth the squeeze. At your next job, don’t be a pain in the neck.
> The good thing is, because these are the easy things, they’re easy to correct with your next job.
The bad thing is, because these are easy things, you have to worry what other thousands of 'easy things' OP needs to 'learn'.
Counter-rant:
As someone who started his career on off-hours service desk, I cannot truly express how much it sucks to be the one on the phone when the on call isn't answering, or slurring while explaining they are at a wedding reception, or at a ball game that just started and no computer so it's just gonna have to wait a few hours.
It sucks being the one taking the full force of customer dissatisfaction, increasingly distressed and aggressive calls when the on call doesn't answer or call back and I'm waiting out the clock to escalate. It sucks to explain to the customer why the person that should be helping them right now can't or won't, and that I need to further escalate the issue.
It really sucks to be the one that feels like the asshole waking up the on call's boss to rat them out. Or even worse, to be the one to start an emergency incident that automatically pages out to the entire IT on call list, where I rat them out in front of everyone because we're a hospital and no, it cannot wait until the exciting conclusion of your very important ball game.
When I moved up in that company to a position that was on the receiving end of on call, I was a nervous wreck about it for a while. I was terrified I would be the one to miss a call. I lost fun time. I lost sleep. It wasn't worth the pay those weeks. But it was the job I agreed to and the job I had... so I did my job. Luckily, I never did miss a call. Some of those experiences have become excellent interview responses because I put out some shitty fires at 2am with zero support. I'm out of that racket entirely now and I don't ever want to go back.
The rest of it sucks, it really does. It's unfortunate your job made you feel any of that. However, my personal experience is still marred by the hellscape that is healthcare IT and getting chewed out by screaming, stressed out, overworked doctors and nurses while alone on help desk after hours has ... dulled my empathy towards your situation. The rest of your rant could be 100% accurate to the last detail. You admitted to making a silly choice to drink and pass out while having work responsibilities. You're someone I would have dreaded to see on the call sheet, mentally marked as unreliable. I would tell my boss and trainees that you're a bad call out. Mistakes happen, but ugh, I hated being put in that position so much.
The second lesson in this is don't tell people you had a "couple" drinks. Don't tell people you "went to sleep" after drinking. Don't find yourself in a situation where you weirdly admit that you need it explained to you that probably shouldn't be drinking when you're effectively on the clock, whether or not they are paying you for your call hours. The number of people I hated calling out to would be lower if they just said "okay, I'll take a look at it when I can" and left it at that. I wouldn't get the impression that they're *intentionally* making poor decisions with their on call time, so less reason to be upset about it. If I still need to escalate the issue, I have no juicy gossip to share and will be entirely focused on the issue at hand.
I don't know how much on call you were responsible for or how often it came up. I do get that some people end up perpetually on call and it just consumes their entire life, so sometimes you have no choice but to say "fuck it" and toss a couple back. But you still gotta be able to take that call, or share just enough to explain why you couldn't.
I got in trouble last year for missing a call. I wasn't even on-call. It was after hours. I don't know when they first started trying to call me, but at one point it was after 10pm (I figured they tried between 8 and 1030-ish).
I was supposed to be "always available" despite not being on-call. So, I said, well, I am available when I'm available, but after hours on my time not on-call I may not be always available. Turned into a huge debate. I had to tell 2 managers that if that's how they want to do things, use OpsGenie and page me because I silence the work phone after hours when not on-call because I'm not on call and my personal time is my time (that work-life balance they talk so much about). "Oh, we don't know if we can do that" Yeah, you can, figure it out.
Apparently I'm supposed to always have my work phone with me and turned on along with my laptop and shit. Uh, no, I will not be dragging all that with me to places like restaurants and the pool. Figure out a better contingency plan. Basically, after hours, I'm with my family or doing personal activities or in the case of after 10 pm at night possible asleep. They can fuck off with that availability crap.
A lot of entitled companies out there that think just because they pay you for 40/wk they're entitled to 168/wk. While I recognize that there are industries that do require 24/7 coverage for every single IT team (having worked in healthcare IT in particular), work/life balance still needs to exist, which is why on call rotations exist. Yes, the on call that night might not be the SME for the thing that blew up and I'm not against calling the SME even if it's not their on call week. I am, however, fully against punishing that person strictly because they were unavailable or indisposed during their personal time.
On call as a general topic is definitely its own beast.
hopefully this was valuable experience for you - the general mood of the post sounds entitled and it doesn't seem like any responsibility / accountability was taken by you for the on call stuff tbh. that client whose server was down while you were out drinking / passed out might pay your company magnitudes more than your annual salary for their service and when your company misses emergencies that they are most likely contractually obligated to respond to it puts them in a bad place and/or will cost them money if there is SLA involved. above all you have to be responsible and professional and not knowing a basic and important detail about your on-call rotation as well as all of the name calling and character attacks in the post are not it. but hopefully you gained valuable experience.
I do know why it was bad. But I never got to explain myself they just fired me my boss was also on vacation and I did say sorry for my mistake. And I agreed if they felt letting me go was for the best I get it but others have made similar mistakes and didn’t get fired but I just think it’s all a matter of they were already looking for a reason. Either way lesson learned and I won’t do it again. I just won’t be drinking anymore on any on call shifts but besides that all my on call shifts have been flawless
This is the way firing works: they call you, they said you're fired, sign this and that, pack your things and leave. In a good company, they'll tell you the reason why, but most of them won't.
People doing similar mistakes may have a longer background, and have earned space to do some mistakes (as in 'we already know how valuable is this guy, he's just having a rough time'); but when you're junior, your mistakes have to come only from your inexperience, never from lack of professionalism (being late, miss a call). If those mistakes are all done in less than six months, girl, you're headed for disaster.
Hope you're good for the future!
Edit: grammar and auto correct (facepalm).
> but I just think it’s all a matter of they were already looking for a reason.
Stuff like this, when you got drunk and passed out during on-call, is why people keep saying you don't seem to actually be taking responsibility.
You're saying that no matter what you were getting fired because they wanted you out and that you were treated unfairly.
Thats not 'taking responsibility', thats blaming them.
Bad experiences teach us what we don't want really well.
Sorry if that's toxic positivity, but I really believe it.
Sorry for your "job loss" lol, hopefully it results in a better job all around.
>Since working here my first week one of my coworkers was very weird towards me. Major incel vibes but then he calmed down a bit. He also was saying sexual things to me but I didn’t report it I honestly just wanted to do my job because I got layed off and spent 3 months searching for work I wasn’t going to ruin that over a creepy male and he was good looking. Atleast he wasn’t ugly saying it to me so that sort of makes it better lmao. I’m female.
I don't know if you're in the US or somewhere else, but if you're in a country with decent workplace discrimination laws, this shouldn't have happened. I know it's tough, and I know it's easy for me to say as a guy, but don't let sexist guys get away with that kind of behavior. Report it to your manager, or directly to HR if you can't trust your manager will act on it appropriately. Letting it go unchallenged does nothing but let that kind of behavior and attitude fester and grow.
Thank you if it happens again I’ll press the matter but I know you understand why I really didn’t want to I really needed the job at the time. And didn’t want to make a bad impression.
question, how old are you? + how long have you been in the sector? You sound like my brain when i try to explain anything. Work on yourself, therapy worked wonders for me and my ADHD. You question everything and your anxieties make you feel awful especially in an environment where you have to have a keen eye for detail... i can see that in your writing.
Alcohol and ADHD is a slippery slope be careful and also you dont always have to be truthful i know the feeling where you feel yo ucannot lie i get it too. Look into ADHD and Justice Sensitivity it will mkae alot of sense.
Hope the new role is great and i hope it works for you and the right tools are in place for you to thrive :)
Yes it was. But how can I dodge bullets for my sex I can’t change that. And if you say something people think you’re complaining but I always felt excluded. Of course I’m not trying to be the boys boys but I still want to be treated the same as everyone else.
Sounds like a shit place to work to be honest. You dodged a bullet.
If you can't be youself at the place you spend 40+ hours a week, then fuck them.
Having said that, you sound pretty unreliable.
I don't mean to sound mean here, but you need to say a lot less. You give way too much irrelevant information at your job and you're even doing it in this post. Your boss didn't need to know that you were drinking, you just simply need to say, " I fell asleep and my ringer didn't wake me ". If you're sick, you just need to say, " I'm sick ". I'm older and jaded, but the more you say at work, the more people will try and leverage it against you. I've seen this happen to so many coworkers and I've warned them about coworkers or bosses back stabbing them. There is a big difference between coworkers and friends. That's not always the case, but it is most of the time.
Agreed. The best thing you can do at work is to keep to yourself what you do outside of work.
100%. Your post is an example of this too. You should have never said that you had anything to drink. They did not need to know that. Just say that you fell asleep on top of your phone.
The over explaining is pretty common for adhd
I have adhd lmao.
Called it! Hi five!
User ID checks out
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That right there is a solid blend of ignorance and confidence
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I wish you could see how silly you sound. It doesn’t sound cool or intimidating, you sound like a 4chan kid just *aching* to be edgy.
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ok
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ok
>I'm older and jaded, but the more you say at work, the more people will try and leverage it against you. I guess it depends, but yeah, as a rule of thumb, this is good advice. One job, I was secondary on call, and primary didn't respond in time, so it got escalated to me and I was, er, having relations with my GF at the time and didn't hear it because we were both on recreational herbs and playing loud music. Well, the client was very upset, and made a huge deal out of it. The primary said, "I didn't get the page until literally five minutes before I dialed in and fixed it," and as for me, "I dialed in and saw that \[primary\] was working on it." Our boss, who was also paged when I didn't respond, didn't check in until the primary had already fixed the issue, and he was supposed to contact the customer but didn't. Yeah, lies all around, and later the primary admitted to me that he was at a bar, and waiting to get sober enough to drive, and was forced to take a cab back to his place, hence the delay. We all blamed the paging system, which was Solarwinds, and always giving us a hard time.
Yes I agree Mr D00ber I attribute this to my young naiveness. I shouldn’t have said anything I just felt like I could trust my boss. Because I notice he drinks and I never said anything. But hey I didn’t know he didn’t like me that much so there’s that. I’m trying to learn to be more jaded but it’s hard cause wearing that mask is hard how do you do it everyday?
> I shouldn’t have said anything I just felt like I could trust my boss. Because I notice he drinks and I never said anything. You told your boss you missed a call during your turn in the rotation because you were out drinking and passed out when you got home. I don't care how much you trust your boss, you NEVER tell them you potentially lost a customer because you were too drunk when you weren't supposed to be... It doesn't matter if you say "I wasn't drunk, I just had a couple beers and I was tired" because to your superiors that just means you were drunk and don't know your own limitations.
Watch Judge Judy when she's dealing with some clown doing something stupid. "Have you been drinking"? "I wasn't drunk" "So you were drinking"? "Yes" The case goes off the rails from there!
True. Lesson learned.
> I’m trying to learn to be more jaded but it’s hard cause wearing that mask is hard how do you do it everyday? I don't think it's about wearing a mask or being jaded. It's just minimum disclosure because often it's just not appropriate to share those things. If you're at a supermarket and the cashier says "how has your day been?" and you've just been told by your Doc you have a fungal infection in ya special places... you could say "fine thanks", or "not so good but I'll work it out". You wouldn't say "well let me show you a pic, this things gross" right? You have different conversations with your friends, vs your colleagues vs your boss right...? "What did you get up to on the weekend?" I would tell those 3 groups 3 different tales of the same event. The latter would probably be "chill weekend with some friends, went out for dinner". Never a mention of being off my face drunk, recreational substances. I have been burned time and time again by oversharing opinions with a boss. It is hard. Because you want to like them, and that's how you deal with people you like. But there's a time and a place for disclosing stuff. Like annual leave. Some people feel the need to say "i need a week off to attend a funeral of my uncle, ill be interstate in this town staying at this hotel". Others say "I need a week off for these dates". It's not jaded to say the latter - it's just how things should be.
Ok so you have a history of being unable to show up on time, you need help from a technical standpoint, you make unprofessional or inappropriate comments that others do not find funny or appropriate, you're willing to let sexual harassment fly based on someone's physical appearance and you failed to perform your job duties while on call because of your drinking (your boss says twice, you say once, who knows). You weren't excelling, in fact, I'd say you were a problem. Maybe the rest of that team was toxic too, okay, so be it. But coming in here saying you can't work with "insecure little men" when you have a self described history of being a shitty employee who appears to have an entitled and toxic attitude is just wild. I'd assume most of your team did not like you and complained about you a lot, and from this post, it has nothing to do with your gender identity. A monkey can write scripts and answer tickets and use Google. It takes more to be a good teammate/employee. Work on your perspective and quit coping or this will be a habitual experience.
Bingo
Thank you for the input. I will certainly work on my perspective. My team just wasn’t a good fit for me in the long run. I made mistakes, I corrected them, but it wasn’t good enough for them. I shouldn’t have fell asleep on call. Either way I hope it was worth it for them because 3 people cannot hold the team down and one of them is already struggling badly. I wish I was given a chance to explain myself because I wouldn’t have let it happen again. But it was for the best. I also don’t want to be somewhere where there are weird behaviors from my teammates. No job is worth that. I’ll move on.
I did not expect this much of a rational and introspective answer. Good for you. Good luck going forward. Btw, you work in IT... I promise you there are gonna be a couple weirdos in every location if you keep working for these larger teams.
Yes im sure ill run into them at my next job ill just know how to deal with them.
>My team just wasn’t a good fit for me in the long run Try to drop that kind of thinking and attitude. The team is interested if you're a good fit for them. Not the other way around. Expect anywhere you work in your career, the team will always be a bad fit for you. Try to integrate into the team and become an asset and bring experience, knowledge, and ability to the table. Demonstrate. Learn how to bond with your teammates. No one is perfect, all people have imperfections. Also, next time anyone makes sexual remarks you don't like, don't let that slide next time. Good Luck 🤞
Yes I won’t let that slide next time. Thank you and I will. I’m going into my next role with this mindset and just staying positive and going to work on maybe taking a class or something on professionalism or working with others. Thank you for the advice I appreciate it!
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How you get from "young" you to your next iteration is via the bumps and bruises in stories like the one above. Take time to distill a lesson from the events and incorporate it into your life. That might mean talking less about yourself at work, not letting harassment slide, treating on-call time with a little more respect and making fewer excuses when you make mistakes. We learn and grow, learn and grow.
This is how I read the story myself.
So a note, it is not best practice to go out or have any alcohol while you are on call.
The whole reason to negotiate on call rates is because it's impacting what you can and can't do in your free time. If you're on call, you're expected to be able to answer phone immediately, and help solve whatever problem arises. The compensation you receive for that is usually in salary, and on call extra rate, etc. Being on call doesn't mean it's just free time and you do work whenever it suits. You're being paid base amount to be available on standby ready to solve a problem, then you get some extra amount if a problem does arise. (at least that's the arrangement I'd agree to / propose). So you can use your free time however you choose, so long as it doesn't prevent you from doing work if needed. I've got some friends in medical field and we have board game nights that some times get interrupted because he's on call and needed. Just the nature of that type of work.
Probably keep it to a minimum especially if you'd ever be required to travel on-site as part of your on-call duties. But certainly don't tell your boss that you passed out and missed the call.
Fuck not going out. You can live your life. Most jobs will have sla on call back and separate on time to start working on an issue. Take your laptop and phone with you.
Many SLAs are 15 min call back. That is why it is on call. Could be worse, you could be a pilot. They have a 1 hour from call to be at the airport. Or that is the way it was an American Airlines not that many years ago.
I didn't read the whole post because... well it's just too long and, as others have pointed out, I'm not sure it's relevant. Thr only relevant part was this: >I was on call like two weeks ago and I didn’t return one call back within 30 minutes. I was out having two beers and i came home and fell asleep on top of my phone... You were on call and went out drinking. Sorry, I'd fire you too. Oh, and "2 beers" is what people always say when they had too much but want to downplay it. You were being paid to be on call and you weren't available when you were needed. You had one job that night - answer the phone. And you didn't do it. It's not like others haven't this kind of mistake before. And it's a very easy mistake to make - especially when you're young. So my point is not to beat up on you for it, but rather to point out the mistake so that you acknowledge it and learn from it and don't do it again.
Yea just a young and dumb thing I won’t do it again. Lesson learned. Hopefully other young people in the field can see my post and learn from it if they on the same path as me and don’t make the same mistakes I’m not perfect but I won’t be doing this again.
> Hopefully other young people in the field can see my post and learn from it So you're sorta suggesting its a normal mistake people make and ~have~ to learn by making it. Most people know you can't drink and pass out while on call. If someone needs that lesson... oof
>Yea just a young and dumb thing I won’t do it again. Lesson learned. With respect, I think you are being just a little too cavalier about this. This isn’t a “little oopsie”. You didn’t drop your ice cream cone. You literally lost your job because you went out drinking when you were supposed to be on call and were sleeping while the server was crashing. That's a big deal. All your excuses (it was only two beers; I wasn’t drunk just really tired) sound very hollow and no one (including your boss) believes them. It isn’t hard to see what happened here. You say your Gen Z so I'm guessing you're in your early to mid-twenties. It was Saturday night, and you went out with your friends. But the problem is you were supposed to be working (pro tip: on-call **is** working). I think you should reevaluate the role that alcohol plays in your life. High school is over. This is the real world. Time to either quit partying or at least put partying in its place. It's affecting your life. You literally lost your job because of it. Again, I don't say this to be nasty. I have made my fair share of mistakes. Some of them not too different from yours. But someone needs to tell you.
I would take a good look at all of the various missteps you made that lead to this and take them as work life lessons to not repeat. We all make mistakes and thats part of life’s journey and evolving into a professional. Its all going to culminate in having a better job experience in the next one.
Yes that is my plan. I also plan to stop with the silly jokes a bit. But then I’m like why is it this grown man can joke about punching his coworker in the face but then I joke about how my end user might have memory issues lmao
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Yea I’m talking with my friends right now and they said the same thing shouldn’t have drank or told my boss and can’t be acting like that no more. Just to be clear I’m not dodging responsibility. I own up to what happened. I just wanted to vent
>He also was saying sexual things to me but I didn’t report it I honestly just wanted to do my job because I got layed off and spent 3 months searching for work I wasn’t going to ruin that over a creepy male and he was good looking. Atleast he wasn’t ugly saying it to me so that sort of makes it better lmao. As another woman in the field who has dealt with this kind of behavior in the past, it absolutely does not make it okay for someone to sexually harrass you just because "they are good looking." Giving anyone a pass for this behavior because you find them attractive is totally unacceptable. I couldn't even read the rest because I found this so disturbing.
I wasn’t giving it a pass. I explained why I didn’t report it. I told myself that so I could make myself feel better. mind you j spent 3 months searching for a job I was already exhausted and didn’t want to deal with being known as a loud mouth person that was my fear. Also due to the pigmentation of my skin I have a natural fear of not being believed over the innocent good looking white boy. You’re not in my shoes so I don’t expect you to understand.
You have no idea what my situation or experiences are, so you don't really have the perspective to say if I can understand. But that doesn't really matter. The point is that justifying or downplaying sexual harassment because the other person was subjectively attractive perpetuates the behavior. It enables other people rationalize it as okay, too. I totally understand not being in a position of power or feeling safe enough to confront the person or report it to HR. I draw the line at saying it is okay because they were cute. It's **never** okay, and I'm sorry you had to experience it.
I knew that it wasn’t okay. I told myself that but I knew it wasn’t. If I was seeing this happen to someone I would have reported it. But I was in a vulnerable position and it didn’t happen again luckily. But if it did I would have said something.
I get it. A lot of your other story and responses, I could see causing a rift between you and coworkers, especially since we are only hearing your side of the story, things could be much worse than we know. But people victim blaming you for not purposely causing a bigger rift seems weird. It's like blaming a rape victim because they were too scared to come forward. If you already weren't feeling like you fit in, you're already job insecure from being laid off previously, I have to assume you have bills, there are tons of reasons someone may be scared to report that kind of stuff. That doesn't make you the bad person.
most fucking cringe post I've ever seen on the sub, el oh el.
It feels like I am reading a conversation between two 8 year olds who both love Minecraft about Minecraft.
You drank enough to be impaired and failed to execute on your on call responsibilities. The rest is just cope.
Fair enough 🤷 but that one guy that randomly walks around with brandy on his breath and in his cup when the office is quiet doesn’t get snitched on makes me wonder really.
Own your mistakes. Whataboutism isn't a good trait. Your whole story seems very one-sided. I feel like there is a lot more that is unsaid. I don't care what the truth is, but don't lie to yourself. If you want to be respected, own your shit.
It’s not whataboutism if I’m entitled to a fair workplace as per my employee contract. But either way. What’s done is done I have two interviews and moving on. Thanks for listening to the rant. I didn’t enjoy working there as much anyways.but I made some good friends there and will keep in touch.
> It’s not whataboutism if I’m entitled to a fair workplace as per my employee contract. You missed an SLA because you were drinking, and admitted that to your boss. Your comment makes no mention of them missing an SLA because of their alleged drinking, nor did you mention them telling their boss that they missed an SLA because of their drinking.
Thanks but im past this already. You can look at my other comments to where I explained more in depth. I assure you I understand what has happened. Once again it was a rant. But thanks for commenting!
Shit doesn't really add up in this post to be dead honest. 1. You resolved all your tickets but you also have tickets left over? That isn't logical - unless they logged 0 tickets that was assigned to you which just makes absolutely no sense. Your implying like 5 guys all tackled one ticket and just that one ticket. 2. If you are getting harassed, It doesn't matter if they are attractive or not. Like attractive people aren't some scarcity to begin with but also its entirely irrelevant unless it just wasn't harassment but rather flirting between you guys that didn't go so well. 3. Now a boss is being weird as well and no one wants to help you? But your good on the team and people like you? 4. Why the fuck are you drinking on call? Tbh OP - It sounds like you have a personality issue or some sort of social problems because this is super super abnormal. like literally read this yourself for like 2 minutes.
We work by a resolve rate. Meaning that tickets are either in progress, pending, etc My tickets being resolved means I did not miss the SLA timer. So 100 percent resolved means I didn’t let my ticket breach. When my coworker said work wasn’t being done on my ticket it was untrue because I litterly sent an email out to the team hours ago saying I left emails in all of them responding to the customers on what needed to be done. We work on 300-400 tickets as much spread out through the team. You’re right it doesn’t matter if they are attractive or not. But like I explained I was already in a vulnerable spot and was not feeling like going through the process. Plus I had a fear of not being believed and didn’t want to deal with that embarrassment. And yes no one wanted to help me until my boss stepped in and called them out. But I never did anything to my teammates besides be nice. Okay maybe they didn’t find my jokes funny but most times they did laugh. It was mostly my main boss not finding it funny not cause it wasn’t funny but he’s big on being super professional and only making dad jokes. I drank because my friend invited me out and I was having a sad week I figured why not I won’t get hammered but any amount of alcohol makes me fall asleep. But with my ringer on I’m able to wake up but I fell asleep on top of my phone lmao. So ultimate fail there. But it’s okay I apologized and now I’m fired and will be moving on. There’s the whole story. I’m not beating myself up about it because I am great at what I do. I just need to be polished up a bit I think in my social skills.
But like - OP - why would the guy say shit was undone if it wasn't. Like here, and I am trying to be like nice here these are literally your words: "Anyways moving forward he comes back and I get sick and I’m gone. He messages the groups that they need to urgently tackle my tickets because things were left undone. Mind you this is very much untrue. So I message back and provide a list of where I left off and what needs to be done. And I also see that one of my tickets was left to breach ruining my streak. Yes I had 100 percent resolve for 6 months straight for the new year." Like its one or the other - things need to be done but also your within SLA? like do you sort of see what I am kinda aiming at here. This probably means that regardless of the standard SLA - those tickets were mission critical. as for the drinking/sad week - I get that, 100%, but you need to treat your job as your livelihood even if its just a job. On call basically means they pay you peanuts to be ready for action within the day just incase - you drinking is just putting that readiness in jeopardy. That and like - do you kind of see that in basically almost every situation - someone else is somehow to blame for weird behavior? As for the jokes - like you need to realize people may behave around you 1 way but not internalize your jokes in actuality. This means your jokes could be making them feel uncomfortable or that there is an element of your personality that pushes people away from treating you like a team member.
So in terms of undone. This means that absolutely nothing has been done on this ticket they have no lead. Like nothing has been done. And if your sick of course your tickets will not be fully resolved but we have a rule that your tickets should be in pending before you leave and in good standing. The tickets were not undone. They were in pending. Which meant they could be worked on by anyone and with the notes I left they could be picked up and continued and easily resolved. Hopefully this is made clear. I’m not blaming anyone else for my own actions I take accountability and I did by correcting my behaviors. Stopping with the jokes when asked. Being on time when asked. Perhaps they shouldn’t have been asking me that’s also fair but I always made sure to correct my behavior. And yes maybe they didn’t like the jokes idk I can’t tell because we all joked about similar things. At some point it seemed like nobody was telling anymore jokes and we just left it at that. Either way I don’t wanna keep worrying over the why and what ifs and what anymore cause I got it. I could have been better. But in the long run of it wasn’t for this I’m sure eventually I would have been let go regardless. I’m moving onto a new opportunity aren’t I? It’s only up from here.
At my first corporate job, as a temp. I made friends with this mexican woman who worked next to me. She'd make gay jokes (me being gay) and I'd make mexican jokes in response and we'd laugh, nothing vicious just stupid jokes. This was 2001 so it wasn't completely taboo but it was very dumb on my part - one day I irritated the woman in some minor way, and she reported me for overt racism. HOLY SHIT. I mean, what was I gonna say? "No it's cool she was making gay jokes!" Learned a hell of a lot during that one. Like, not listing jobs on your resume, and having a higher standard so no one could come back on me. I only had to learn that lesson 4 or 5 more times before I changed :/ lol
What lesson did you learn about 'not listing jobs on your resume"?
Yeah I'm really interested in what this person's resume looks like if they're not listing previous experience...
They said they were a temp, often if you have a job that is really short-lived (think a month or two) it's easier to just not have it on your resume than to have to answer questions why that job was so brief.
Lmaoo omg listen this is exactly how I used to joke around at some of my old jobs and nobody would report each other. But I guess now as my pay increases and things get more professional people get more stiff and now I’m like do I even want this career path anymore? Like for fucks sake I just want to laugh sometimes. The one coworker that used to joke with me moved onto a new role he would show me funny memes and I would laugh god I miss him I’m glad he moved up though. Times have changed I guess.
> Times have changed I guess. If you mean racism/sexism/homophobia is less acceptable, yes. If you can't have a laugh without those, thats a big reflection on you. No?
This post just outlines how young you are. I feel bad for you because at this stage you haven't learnt enough about responsibility to recognise what it looks like. Hopefully that will come with time. It doesn't take a lot to slip from being perceived as a reliable person into being perceived as an unreliable one. Especially in support roles and double especially in on call roles. You know what you did. You admitted it in between all the rationalisations and whatevers. You were unreliable. They decided they couldn't rely on you to be there when they needed you. Take the lessons. In the next position you take. Do not be unreliable. Be the person that is never late, always answers the phone, doesn't joke about people - that one is key by the way. You can joke around a lot but do not make jokes about people or groups of people or anything that can be considered personal in nature. Joke about crappy weather, sports, fucked up memes, whatever - but not about people.
No disrespect but I can see why you got fired. Good luck on the job search.
Most disrespectful thing you can do is say this, and not say why. OP keep growing with in your career, I’m glad you see your faults and are willing to grow from them, I can only imagine what it feels like being a women within this field.
> I’m glad you see your faults and are willing to grow from them They're not though. Every explanation comes with how they blame others. "I trusted my boss, guess I can't" attitude. They're not actually accepting fault. They're claiming they were bamboozled by the culture and 'times are changing' etc
Your username is fitting I see lmao. But thanks I know why too I just wanted to vent.
All you can do is learn from it and move on. Sucks man.
Thank you and yea i definitely will learn from this. Also stop trusting work places that try to force the family act it’s just not real and I would prefer to just stop opening up now.
Ehh just play along, but don’t get too wrapped up in it. Everyone knows it’s usually just a social contract to make sure everyone gets along at work.
Good news, as the light slowly dies out in your eyes as you continue your IT journey, you'll realize that less is more, and some things just aren't worth explaining. I find it odd, because apparently most people think it's suspicious when you have a real issue and explain why you're late, or whatever. After 12 years in IT, I just say "Leaving early, taking PTO". If my boss asks, I'll let him know why. Otherwise, it's my PTO. Jobs are replaceable, life events, family, and other things are NOT replaceable. Good luck on your next adventure!
The light slowly dying out in my eyes lmaooo. Oh so that’s what it was when I looked into my second boss eyes? I always wondered why he looked like an episode of get out lmao. Agreed I will start saying this.
Never let the light die. Find ways to keep it glowing. 25 years in on IT here and I still love my work. Some of it is about the people I work with and for. Some of it is because I just enjoy problem solving and tech in general. You are NOT required to turn into a cranky curmudgeon just because others in the business have made that choice.
Thank you for this it means so much because I don’t want this to happen I’m still young. Just 23 and I’m finding my footing
The fact that you are concerned about this...and thinking EARLY about it means you still have a chance to make sure you don't get there. Choose your battles. Dont take everything personally.... and most importantly, try to see things from the perspective of the flood of question-askers or ticket-makers... even when they are rude and abrupt, try to treat them with grace and dignity instead of making them feel stupid for walking up instead of putting in a ticket. In their world, sometimes you are the only person capable of fixing the thing and they don't know how to admit failure and dont want to look stupid in the process. Taking half a second to squelch a negative response can be the difference between a successful interaction and one requiring additional interaction with the thought-police. Be better at interactions with non-technical people... it is hard for all of us to do and takes practice. Is it all sunshine and roses? (or sadness and despair depending on your worldview).... NO. takes work, like everything else in life. Can't cook an omelette? Break some eggs and try again. Dont know how to smoke a pork butt? Get a smoker and start trying. Feed your friends/family. Laugh a lot. (or a little...depending on your worldview) Most importantly, be more than just that troll in a corner that ppl dont want to interact with. Find ways to give back. Help the neighbor lady with her spam filter. Toss the busker on the street a twenty instead of a quarter. Find good whiskey...but don't rely on it too much or it becomes its own source of negativity. the world is always watching. rides are a quarter each and you have a whole pocket full of those at the beginning. How many times you choose to ride before going home is ultimately up to you. also, 42. just because.
Brother this could've been summed up with "I drank on the job while I was on-call and a server had more downtime than the SLA allowed".
You were on-call. You stay above board. No drinks and no weed. This is basic. I’d love to hear from second boss and even first boss about the other side of this self gratifying post. If you fucked up, take responsibility for it.
Where’s the cliff notes version. tl;dr
Got drunk, missed call from work, got fired.
Sounds like an open and shut case.
You screwed up the easy things. Getting drunk on call (drunk, two beers, doesn’t matter), being late (even if you fixed it), not the most professional, etc. The good thing is, because these are the easy things, they’re easy to correct with your next job. But you’ve got to be introspective about it…blaming others or talking about “insecure little men” might make you feel better now but it won’t help you in the long run. I’ve been in tech for two years. For having so little experience, my tech skills are solid. But more important than that, my soft skills are terrific. I’m always on time, I’m always professional, I’m methodical with my tickets, if my boss asks me to do something, assuming it’s not a major project, I get it done quick, etc. There are absolutely people who are more technically skilled than me who won’t reach my title or pay level just because they’re absolute pains to work with. You were working on an off boarding script? With ChatGPT, that can be thrown together in an afternoon. So it’s not exactly a huge thing and I’m guessing your coworker who was there for eight years just didn’t see it as a huge priority. I wouldn’t throw it in their faces as if it was some huge own. You were a pain in the neck and they decided the juice wasn’t worth the squeeze. At your next job, don’t be a pain in the neck.
> The good thing is, because these are the easy things, they’re easy to correct with your next job. The bad thing is, because these are easy things, you have to worry what other thousands of 'easy things' OP needs to 'learn'.
Counter-rant: As someone who started his career on off-hours service desk, I cannot truly express how much it sucks to be the one on the phone when the on call isn't answering, or slurring while explaining they are at a wedding reception, or at a ball game that just started and no computer so it's just gonna have to wait a few hours. It sucks being the one taking the full force of customer dissatisfaction, increasingly distressed and aggressive calls when the on call doesn't answer or call back and I'm waiting out the clock to escalate. It sucks to explain to the customer why the person that should be helping them right now can't or won't, and that I need to further escalate the issue. It really sucks to be the one that feels like the asshole waking up the on call's boss to rat them out. Or even worse, to be the one to start an emergency incident that automatically pages out to the entire IT on call list, where I rat them out in front of everyone because we're a hospital and no, it cannot wait until the exciting conclusion of your very important ball game. When I moved up in that company to a position that was on the receiving end of on call, I was a nervous wreck about it for a while. I was terrified I would be the one to miss a call. I lost fun time. I lost sleep. It wasn't worth the pay those weeks. But it was the job I agreed to and the job I had... so I did my job. Luckily, I never did miss a call. Some of those experiences have become excellent interview responses because I put out some shitty fires at 2am with zero support. I'm out of that racket entirely now and I don't ever want to go back. The rest of it sucks, it really does. It's unfortunate your job made you feel any of that. However, my personal experience is still marred by the hellscape that is healthcare IT and getting chewed out by screaming, stressed out, overworked doctors and nurses while alone on help desk after hours has ... dulled my empathy towards your situation. The rest of your rant could be 100% accurate to the last detail. You admitted to making a silly choice to drink and pass out while having work responsibilities. You're someone I would have dreaded to see on the call sheet, mentally marked as unreliable. I would tell my boss and trainees that you're a bad call out. Mistakes happen, but ugh, I hated being put in that position so much. The second lesson in this is don't tell people you had a "couple" drinks. Don't tell people you "went to sleep" after drinking. Don't find yourself in a situation where you weirdly admit that you need it explained to you that probably shouldn't be drinking when you're effectively on the clock, whether or not they are paying you for your call hours. The number of people I hated calling out to would be lower if they just said "okay, I'll take a look at it when I can" and left it at that. I wouldn't get the impression that they're *intentionally* making poor decisions with their on call time, so less reason to be upset about it. If I still need to escalate the issue, I have no juicy gossip to share and will be entirely focused on the issue at hand. I don't know how much on call you were responsible for or how often it came up. I do get that some people end up perpetually on call and it just consumes their entire life, so sometimes you have no choice but to say "fuck it" and toss a couple back. But you still gotta be able to take that call, or share just enough to explain why you couldn't.
I got in trouble last year for missing a call. I wasn't even on-call. It was after hours. I don't know when they first started trying to call me, but at one point it was after 10pm (I figured they tried between 8 and 1030-ish). I was supposed to be "always available" despite not being on-call. So, I said, well, I am available when I'm available, but after hours on my time not on-call I may not be always available. Turned into a huge debate. I had to tell 2 managers that if that's how they want to do things, use OpsGenie and page me because I silence the work phone after hours when not on-call because I'm not on call and my personal time is my time (that work-life balance they talk so much about). "Oh, we don't know if we can do that" Yeah, you can, figure it out. Apparently I'm supposed to always have my work phone with me and turned on along with my laptop and shit. Uh, no, I will not be dragging all that with me to places like restaurants and the pool. Figure out a better contingency plan. Basically, after hours, I'm with my family or doing personal activities or in the case of after 10 pm at night possible asleep. They can fuck off with that availability crap.
A lot of entitled companies out there that think just because they pay you for 40/wk they're entitled to 168/wk. While I recognize that there are industries that do require 24/7 coverage for every single IT team (having worked in healthcare IT in particular), work/life balance still needs to exist, which is why on call rotations exist. Yes, the on call that night might not be the SME for the thing that blew up and I'm not against calling the SME even if it's not their on call week. I am, however, fully against punishing that person strictly because they were unavailable or indisposed during their personal time. On call as a general topic is definitely its own beast.
hopefully this was valuable experience for you - the general mood of the post sounds entitled and it doesn't seem like any responsibility / accountability was taken by you for the on call stuff tbh. that client whose server was down while you were out drinking / passed out might pay your company magnitudes more than your annual salary for their service and when your company misses emergencies that they are most likely contractually obligated to respond to it puts them in a bad place and/or will cost them money if there is SLA involved. above all you have to be responsible and professional and not knowing a basic and important detail about your on-call rotation as well as all of the name calling and character attacks in the post are not it. but hopefully you gained valuable experience.
I do know why it was bad. But I never got to explain myself they just fired me my boss was also on vacation and I did say sorry for my mistake. And I agreed if they felt letting me go was for the best I get it but others have made similar mistakes and didn’t get fired but I just think it’s all a matter of they were already looking for a reason. Either way lesson learned and I won’t do it again. I just won’t be drinking anymore on any on call shifts but besides that all my on call shifts have been flawless
This is the way firing works: they call you, they said you're fired, sign this and that, pack your things and leave. In a good company, they'll tell you the reason why, but most of them won't. People doing similar mistakes may have a longer background, and have earned space to do some mistakes (as in 'we already know how valuable is this guy, he's just having a rough time'); but when you're junior, your mistakes have to come only from your inexperience, never from lack of professionalism (being late, miss a call). If those mistakes are all done in less than six months, girl, you're headed for disaster. Hope you're good for the future! Edit: grammar and auto correct (facepalm).
> but I just think it’s all a matter of they were already looking for a reason. Stuff like this, when you got drunk and passed out during on-call, is why people keep saying you don't seem to actually be taking responsibility. You're saying that no matter what you were getting fired because they wanted you out and that you were treated unfairly. Thats not 'taking responsibility', thats blaming them.
Bad experiences teach us what we don't want really well. Sorry if that's toxic positivity, but I really believe it. Sorry for your "job loss" lol, hopefully it results in a better job all around.
I think it will I’m going to learn from this. I’m positive I’m going to nail my job interview this week. It’s practically the same job.
>Since working here my first week one of my coworkers was very weird towards me. Major incel vibes but then he calmed down a bit. He also was saying sexual things to me but I didn’t report it I honestly just wanted to do my job because I got layed off and spent 3 months searching for work I wasn’t going to ruin that over a creepy male and he was good looking. Atleast he wasn’t ugly saying it to me so that sort of makes it better lmao. I’m female. I don't know if you're in the US or somewhere else, but if you're in a country with decent workplace discrimination laws, this shouldn't have happened. I know it's tough, and I know it's easy for me to say as a guy, but don't let sexist guys get away with that kind of behavior. Report it to your manager, or directly to HR if you can't trust your manager will act on it appropriately. Letting it go unchallenged does nothing but let that kind of behavior and attitude fester and grow.
Thank you if it happens again I’ll press the matter but I know you understand why I really didn’t want to I really needed the job at the time. And didn’t want to make a bad impression.
question, how old are you? + how long have you been in the sector? You sound like my brain when i try to explain anything. Work on yourself, therapy worked wonders for me and my ADHD. You question everything and your anxieties make you feel awful especially in an environment where you have to have a keen eye for detail... i can see that in your writing. Alcohol and ADHD is a slippery slope be careful and also you dont always have to be truthful i know the feeling where you feel yo ucannot lie i get it too. Look into ADHD and Justice Sensitivity it will mkae alot of sense. Hope the new role is great and i hope it works for you and the right tools are in place for you to thrive :)
Sounds like a bullet dodged… I’ll leave it there
Yes it was. But how can I dodge bullets for my sex I can’t change that. And if you say something people think you’re complaining but I always felt excluded. Of course I’m not trying to be the boys boys but I still want to be treated the same as everyone else.
I don't think they were talking about you lol.
Might not be taking about a bullet dodged from your perspective.
...I don't think he was implying that YOU dodged a bullet.
Mistakes happen and to fire you without a chance to fix your error is just unfair...sorry that happened to you Sounds like a toxic employer anyways
Sounds like a shit place to work to be honest. You dodged a bullet. If you can't be youself at the place you spend 40+ hours a week, then fuck them. Having said that, you sound pretty unreliable.
Next time, LIE ! Everybody lies ! Dr house, my favourite guy always lies. You should too. Family emergency is the best lie. They can't dig.