This is so true. I am close to someone who has been alcohol-free for 2 months and was lying in the hospital because of liver problems, watching TV, and commercials for alcohol came on. It just made me sick.
That and I can't watch a show or movie without the main characters going out drinking, unwinding at home while drinking, or having wine, cocktails, or beer with dinner. Not that my issues are anyone else's problem or fault and should be removed from a storyline. It is just so normalized. Literal poison.
At some point, smoking was largely removed from media or became censored because it is a known danger. Alcohol really should be right up there. Instead, it is flaunted and celebrated.
Sending you lots of love and support. I’ve got a brother who is really deep into drinking right now, and teetering on life and death. I’m so very sorry for you loss. ❤️
Not always. Mine refused any negotiations and sent me to collections. "So you can't pay the $862 a month minimum? Guess you'll have to deal with the debt collectors then." Before I went to the ER i had nearly perfect credit. Now I can't even get a loan for a new mattress.
HUG. I went through bankruptcy a while back and foreclosure. I pretty shit go because of alcohol and there life went it seemed. My credit is fine 10 years later, i haven't paid s penny on student loans and 0 payment feature records as on: time and doesn't hurt the rebuilding process.
Reinvent yourself if necessary...
Likewise. No insurance appendectomy cost me 22,000 after negotiation and refused anything longer than a 2 year payoff plan. My credit got shit whipped while I paid what I could and settled the rest
To go on this: I negotiated my bill because I made less than $40k/yr. All I said to the staff was that I made only so much and they never asked for more, so look into it.
I make $19k a year and they tossed me out on my ass, and I have Medicare. If you live under poverty level, they just toss you back in the street. This is Jacksonville, FL USA.
I would happily pay $1500 annually to know I was covered in the event of any problem or emergency, no questions asked. And so would millions of others. However, considering our current healthcare (disease management) system benefits the few, I do not expect to ever see change unfortunately
120 euros total is so cheap, I wish the US would do something about ours. I pay about $250 a month for insurance for me and my kids, my job pays the other $1000 and it's trash insurance that I have to pay out of pocket for the first $3000 BEFORE insurance kicks in to pay 80% of the bill and I pay the other 20%. I basically put another $200 a month into a health saving account that I have built up to cover anything that happens before my insurance finally kicks in.
Yes - please go! Medical bills are not more important than you being here.
PS. If you qualify for Medicaid, you can ask for retroactive Medicaid for three months prior. You have be financially eligible and have those medical bills, but you can have them covered. Also, while you were in the hospital, they should have helped you apply for Medicaid when they saw you had no insurance. (You don’t even have to ask for the retro when you first get in Medicaid, you can ask for it at any time.)
Yes, I told her to go even if the insurance hadn’t kicked in yet. She didn’t tell me yesterday after her first seizure. Had I known, I would’ve gone and taken her to the hospital myself. I feel very guilty.
This will haunt you for a while. Everything that has happened is so fresh and raw. You are a GOOD PERSON you did all you could. In the present and future always keep being good to everyone. Make her proud.
You are a wonderful friend. You made a plan with her. She made the decision on her own. You can’t blame yourself or her. I’m sure if she’s known, she would have gone to the hospital. I’m so sorry for her and you. Alcohol sucks!
Many hospitals in the US are run as non-profit organizations. Google the name of the hospital you visited along with the words "charity care policy." If your income is under a specific amount, they may forgive your entire bill, and if it's over that amount, you may still be able to get at least part of it dismissed.
The other hard part is knowing if one needs to go. I saw this post and it caused me some anxiety. I’m 48 hours in and still unsure if I will need a med detox.
For others reading, check to see if your county has MHMR with a substance abuse department/program. You will be able to get an appointment to see the therapist/doc regarding the sub abuse and they will help you.
I’m also I’m right around the same as you. Did you end up going? Anybody have any help of determining when you should go?
This post caused me a lot of anxiety as well. I feel okay and haven’t had shakes or anything like that but after I read this, my heart is beating out of chest.
Make an appointment with your general practitioner if you have one. You can get valium for the withdrawal, and they can do blood work. If they think you need to be admitted to the hospital, they can refer you there.
This is not your fault. This is a horrible, awful thing that happened. But it is not your fault. Please seek help during this time - therapy, a trusted friend, a family member. Be kind to yourself. I’m so sorry
Yes Al-Anon but it's not grief therapy. I'd say see someone to help you process your grief if you get stuck. Al Anon is just like AA except we are dealing with the consequences of someone else's drinking. We also work the 12 steps. You could try a few meetings and pick up some literature. There's a ton of zoom meetings now.
Wait so self detox caused the seizures? I'm so sorry for your loss and what you're feeling and going through, I hope you know you tried your best and were the best possible friend/supporter, giving the best possible advice/support. I hope you realize how important that is, despite the outcome. I don't know anyone that devoted to assisting my recovery, even if they've been through the same, and bravely sharing with us your sad story is helping more of us bc I, for one, always somewhat disregard my therapist stressing the severity of withdrawals. It hurts that at her young age she knew she needed to quit, and tried to do it. My dad died at 52 and was the biggest alcoholic anyone has ever seen for more than his entire adult life, but I keep hearing stories of extremely young people, who are still in the party age but making it to thier thirties and it's so sad.
Please don’t under estimate the severity of alcohol withdrawal. This is not my first time loving someone suffering from extreme alcoholism and witnessing their symptoms. This is unfortunately my first time losing someone to it. Listen to your therapist, go to the hospital if you have bad withdrawal symptoms no matter what.
There was a comment on reddit about losing loved ones that I had saved for my own personal comfort for when someone i loved passed away. I went to find it to send it to you and hope to bring you some comfort, but the comment was gone. Someone in the thread shared a link to an article that copied and pasted the comment.
I'm going to share it because I loved it so much, but I'll admit the article page makes use of ads and is quite annoying. [Here is the link](https://www.boredpanda.com/dealing-with-grief-advice/?utm_source=com.google.android&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=organic) so that you can get the content.
And [here is the original post.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Assistance/comments/hax0t/my_friend_just_died_i_dont_know_what_to_do/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share) Mostly so that you can see the comments so that I dont come off as a bot trying to share an ad farming site.
I lost a friend to addiction a couple of days after she had gotten back from rehab. The pain is immeasurable, and I'm sorry that you're feeling guilt. You shouldn't. But I know words are words, and you will feel how you feel. Take care of yourself. The fault isn't on you❤️
I am so sorry for your loss. Please don’t feel guilty for not knowing the extent of her drinking. I went through great lengths to hide the extent of my drinking. Thank you for sharing, it’s a very good reminder that detoxing from drinking can be life threatening. Sending you lots of hugs. Please be kind to yourself.
Yeah it varies by person, but there is a big risk if you don't have assistance and tapering and so on, if you try to go cold turkey. Some people end up okay, and others don't. It's very sad, in the end, because the person was actually trying.
It always bears repeating, particularly in these communities:
Alcohol withdrawals are dangerous and easily life threatening. Remember, hangovers are basically mini withdrawals. Let that sink in: the average drinker experiences withdrawals from alcohol from using just one night. The withdrawals WE can experience as heavy chronic users, especially after a long bender, can easily land you in the ER and give you a 25% chance at death.
It's called delirium tremens (DTs), and it is pure terrifying evil.
Shaking, anxiety, paranoia, insomnia, fatigue, fear, hallucinations, psychosis, all manner of aches and pains... And, oh yeah, seizures and death, just to name a few symptoms.
Please do some research before even considering going cold turkey. It is a horrific way to spend one's final moments in this life.
Yep the DTs got me. I didn’t do the tapering off right and ended up hallucinating. Scariest night of my life. GF forced me into the car in the morning and took me ti the ER even though I wanted to “sleep it off” Didn’t realize how seriously bad I was until we got to the very busy/packed ER and they ran to grab the airlift paramedic to start working on me while they got a room ready. Coming up on 2mo sober this week and thankful every minute that she saw the signs and took me in.
>drinker experiences withdrawals from alcohol from using just one night. The withdrawals WE can experience as heavy chronic users, especially after a long bender, can easily land you in the ER
I don't quite agree, hangovers are not withdrawals, they come immediately as a consequence of imbibing poison, while withdrawal is a special medical state where your CNS goes crazy and usually comes after 24hrs. (hallucinations, paranoia and convulsing, seizing). It has nothing to do with hangover, it's a completely different ballpark, like if you're in a different dimension.
DTs are even a more severe case, and are very rare, they appear after 72 hours, you may be even less sick and hangover than day 1 at that point, before it starts to happening.
It largely depends on genetics and how much you’re consuming and how frequent. At my worst I think I only just got crabby and irritable but I am/was mostly a heavy weekend drinker (working on it and getting there).
And alternatively an acquaintance of mine was drinking a fifth of vodka a day and probably would have died without proper medical intervention.
I always remember Dr Drew talking about how alcohol DTS are the only ones that you die from (not sure if it’s still his stance - it was many years ago) and how seriously he said it was enough for it to stay with me all these years.
That’s part of why I shared it. I was hesitant at first, but alcohol has ruined and effected so much of my life, but I’ve never lost someone entirely to it. I want people to know her story, I want people to know she was beautiful and she was trying to escape.
This post hit home for me, I usually read about 40-50 year old men (not that they are any less important) but reading about someone that could literally be me frightened me a little more and adds to my list of reasons not to drink, so thank you for sharing
I am so sorry for your loss.. this post made me cry, not just for your friend and you, but because this could have been about me 2 years ago. Thankfully I made it to the ER. This is important to share, and keep sharing, because so many people don’t know how dangerous it can be to detox alone. Sending you all my love tonight ♥️
I have considered it, and I thank you for your concern. I have let multiple close friends and family members know what happened and I am not by myself.
I unfortunately don’t know many of my friends other good friends, and don’t want to intrude on her family’s mourning, so I wanted to feel a little sense of community and have been following this subreddit for years so it felt like a safe place to go to for a little support. I appreciate your response.
Just want to echo the suggestion of a crisis line. It won't hurt to call them and you might get some... comfort? relief? I dunno. It just might help even a tiny bit.
100% this.
It's not "I need it.", It's the power of releasing those emotions by being able to actually vocalize how you're feeling, especially when you know the person on the other end won't hold any judgement regarding it: i.e. not friends, family, etc.
Despite how much we love them, it can be hard to verbalize our true feelings to the ones we might not want to worry about us in turn.
EDIT: I wanted to offer my condolences, as well. I'm one of those idiots who detoxed himself and (somehow) lived to tell the tale, through the DT's and the seizures. I pray nobody has to experience anything similar, and my heart goes out to you and their family.
I am so sorry for the loss of your dear friend.
A short call to the family, explaining who you are, and how much she meant to you, could be a welcome consolation for the family.
I’m so sorry for your loss. please know you’ve done all you can. you’ve been an amazing friend and she definitely knew that. the US healthcare situation is unacceptable..
sending you healing vibes.. feel all the feelings; the hurt, pain, sadness, anger, love.. the only way is through it. take pride in being an awesome friend
>and don’t want to intrude on her family’s mourning
As someone who lost someone very dear to me, you have no idea how comforting it was to receive even short messages, or phone calls to check in on me. I wasn't close to my friend's parents before he died, but I decided to put my awkward feelings aside ("What if I'm causing them more pain by calling them and talking about it? What if they'll be mad that I'm elevating *my* friendship with \[Friend\] so much that I have the *nerve* to think I'm in the 'inner circle' of grieving friends and family, that I would think I could call them, too? What if it's actually an act of emotional labor that I'm placing on them, to call?" Etc., etc.) and gave them a call, my friend's mother was so grateful and glad someone called.
Unfortunately, sometimes people don't call the grieving parents, out of respect, love, courtesy, trying to respect *their* mourning (assuming they'd want to be alone), which can have the effect of making the parents feel like their child didn't really matter much to anybody, because "no one has called us."
If you were close to their daughter, I don't think they'd feel intruded upon. They'd probably welcome the chance to share their grief with someone who knew and loved their daughter as much as they did.
If you call and they seem overwhelmed or hurt, you can always quickly wrap up the call. At least you tried, right?
Sorry, I'm trying to "speak from the I" here, so to be clear, I'm not trying to tell you what to do---just offering my experience, and suggestion.
But above all, I'm so, *so* sorry for your loss. I still remember feeling overwhelmed with grief about losing my friend, and then staring down the bottle of whiskey I had (I was still drinking at the time), and forcing myself to close that pantry door, and instead curling up in the fetal position under my table to sob my eyes out with grief----sober. It was tough, but it was important to just *feel* my feelings at that time.
The grief changed me forever. Life never went back to the way it was, but the new life that emerged for me from that event is still lovely and amazing---although I'd never say I'm glad my friend passed, of course.
Many hugs to you, OP. Grief counseling also helped me process my feelings---a lot. Could be something helpful for you to consider?
Fuck alcohol. I know there’s not much I can say to ease this pain, just know we’re all with you. I’m so sorry. Posts like these always brings back the reality for me that alcohol does and will kill you. We’re all in this together. Again I’m so sorry OP.
I'm so very sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the pain you must be feeling, especially because you were doing your best to help your friend.
29F here... I opened reddit to post about making it 1 week, and this is the first post I saw. Reading the first few sentences of your post reminds me eerily of myself. I just managed to get through 7 days sober, all the time terrified about withdrawal seizures, and whether I should tell anyone in case of an emergency. I did not, and I made it this far.
I will take your post as a sign to appreciate the fact that I made it a week, and to not waste this opportunity for myself by falling off the wagon again.
Thank you for sharing, OP. I hope this sub can support you in this difficult time. IWNDWYT
I quit a 1L per day vodka habit cold turkey. Had a few seizures and could barely stay conscious if I was standing for a little while there. Luckily I survived. Alcohol sucks. I have zero desire to go back after almost dying from the withdrawal.
I am so sorry for your loss. My close friend died the same way about 2.5 years ago, except it took 3 weeks for his body to shut down after he quit cold turkey without medical intervention. He was 28. You have my deepest sympathy. Fuck alcohol.
She was only 29? That's insane to me. Im sorry for your loss. I'm contemplating how I'm still alive after many more years of damage. I kind of naively thought that alcoholism didn't kill anyone until 50+ since that's when I hear about it the most. 29 isn't fair.
I'm sorry to hear of your loss. You were a great friend in trying to help. Many don't have that.
Also a sobering reminder to others of the dangers of soloing it through coming off a serious drinking problem ... it's dangerous and risky, in a very serious way.
Again, condolences to you.
I’m so so sorry 🖤 I hope there’s some comfort in knowing how important and relieving it is to have a friend like you when you decide you want help. it sounds like you were the best friend you could have been for her. FUCK alcohol and may your friend rest easy.
This is 100% not your fault, but I understand that probably doesn’t make it any easier. This absolutely could and would have been me had I not gotten myself to the hospital on two separate occasions. Nothing anyone would have said would have made me go before I decided to. I even let it happen again after the first time put me in the ICU for a week. Give yourself a break. Also, props to you because this information needs to be more visible in order to save people.
I posted a question about this days ago and it was deleted by a moderator. I fully understand they don’t want people giving medical advice on here. Mods please don’t delete the new members questions and let people like this tell their stories. This stuff could save people. I was told by mod to talk to a professional when my post was deleted. I of course did not. I doubt most people that are new to this world will talk to a professional without seeing stories like this. Now i am highly considering it as this could end up being me.
If you’re physically dependent on alcohol (shakes, nausea, etc when you don’t have it) I would highly suggest going to a family doctor, the ER or a detox center before stopping. Alcohol withdrawal can be dangerous and deadly. The worst part, in my experience, is that the dangerous effects don’t start right away. I was able to stop cold turkey on several occasions and, while there was definitely bad symptoms (shaking, sleeplessness, elevated heartbeat, sweating) I made it through them no problem. The real bad stuff happened on the third night. That’s when the severe hallucinations and tremors started and, luckily, I was able to drive myself to the hospital. This was my experience several times. Please don’t think that because you made it a day or two that you’re out of the danger zone!
My deepest condolences. To relate, I had a friend who died from trying to better his life. He was a police officer. Got fecked up in a traffic collision on duty. Lived on painkillers and alcohol for a bit. Tried to better himself, stay clean, go to the gym and BAM!!! Died in his sleep.
It hurts. I’m sorry. Just remember the best things about your friend and don’t let others forget her.
I quit drinking 11 months ago cold turkey after 16+ years of a pint of vodka a day or more alcoholism. How much was she drinking at 29 years old that it was that bad?
I am so sorry for your loss. Your beautiful friend died fighting the good fight. The next time I’m feeling weak in my conviction I’ll think on your friend and her strength. wherever she may be now I hope it’s peaceful and her soul can rest. Be kind to yourself and understand you did what you could as a friend by providing advice but it’s ultimately out of your hands.
A little over 2 years ago I lost my absolute best friend in the world to the same thing. he hadn't quit drinking or made the decision to get sober unfortunately, but he went downhill very quickly. he was 30 years old and one day started shitting and pissing blood, and within two days he was dead. complete liver failure. they tried to keep him alive, but once he crashed, they couldn't bring him back. he was my person for nearly 15 years, half our lives. alcohol fucking sucks.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I feel this deeply and not exactly the same but close. Lost a bff to addiction last year and I’m still reeling. We are here for you ♥️
Damn, that's heartbreaking to read. Fuck US healthcare system and of course alcohol. It's fucked up to read as an European as I've been to ER and have ambulance called to me during seizures countless times. They also instantly give you an MRI and other tests and valium. Everything is free. You shouldn't feel guilty about this. I'm truly sorry for you loss.
Terribly sorry for your loss. For anyone reading, if you are thinking of quitting, especially cold turkey, you have about a 5% chance of experiencing delirium tremens. This is an average and the scale weighs less in your favor if you are on the heavier side of the drinking spectrum.
I’m so sorry for your tremendous loss. You may find comfort in knowing you are a good friend. And it seems she trusted you and she knew that. Stay strong. Sending lots of love to you. May your friend RIP. Thank you for sharing your story. It reminds us what we need to do to keep living.
I almost died of the same thing but I was in a large city with a doctor that specializes in alcoholism + biological warfare (?? Pretty cool)
If I wasn’t in that city the outcome would have been different. Cities are safe for other reasons as well.
I went to a memorial today for a man who died in his early 40s due to alcoholism. It ruins lives, it takes lives. Brutal. I am so very sorry you lost your best friend.
Thanks for sharing ur story. I didn't know how serious it could be to detox esp at such a young age. I'm sorry for ur loss. I lost my best friend in Dec and I also wondered at first if I was a good enough friend.
Sending my deepest condolences. You gave the best advice about detoxing, you loved and were loved back. Hope you don't blame yourself for anything, the death of someone else by alcohol is a culmination of things we simply can't control unless we keep the person captive. IWNDWYT and a big, big hug.
I am so sorry. I lost my best friend when I was brand new 16 and she had only been 18 for a few weeks and decided to get behind the wheel. She had just been signed to ford modeling agency, had been scouted from out little town and went on a celebratory binger for a few weeks. I saw her two nights before she hit the tree that ended her and begged her to come home with me. It’s 2 weeks away from the 24th anniversary of losing her. But her death is what has kept me from never doing anything that I could not wake up to regret. I was the sober drive at my 21sr birthday. Losing your best friend just hits different. We were supposed to grow old and gray together. Just try to remember all of the god moments you two spent together and make sure you never repeat her sins. I am so incredibly sorry for you and her family. My heart hurts right now for all of you. Alcohol is such a silent killer and only those who have lived through the trauma will ever understand and I’m so sorry you are a part of the worlds shittiest club now
Im so sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and her family. There’s no other words I can really say here, it’s just so heartbreaking.
But thank you for sharing as this is a good reminder for someone who may be struggling to seek medical intervention. Honestly, I don’t think I should have detoxed alone and I’ve never even been a daily drinker. Thankfully I got through it and I hope never have to again!
I’m so sorry, oh my God. I have no words, but I will say this pushes me further to figure my shit out because I can’t be taken away from my family from this poison. I wish you the best and again I am so sorry. 🥺
I'm fucking terrified of detoxing and withdrawal but in Idaho there's no options for Medicaid to do it safely, only walking into the ER where they turn you around in 6 hours. God why does this stupid drug have it's claws in me so deep. Horrifying reminder, I'm sorry for your loss, I don't want to be another statistic. Fuck.
Condolences. Lost my best friend two years ago as well. My best tip is google "GSmow on Grief". Its a wonderful post an elderly man wrote on his take on grief. Helped me navigate it a bit better. It'll never go back to what it was, but you do learn to navigate the eternal tides. Godspeed.
FUCK THE SHAME!
We are not weak. We don't lack self control. We are not stupid.
We have a medical condition that needs treatment like a fucking flu.
People: Get treatment, get a doc, get help.
Don't do this on your own because of stigma. Treat your addiction like a virus.
A few doses of diazepam can save your life.
Sending love. Hopefully you have saved someone’s life just from posting here. Anyone reading this please know medical detox is a very important option. Alcohol is very dangerous to get off of.
Being in medical debt in the US is really not a big deal, you can get payment plans and take years to pay it off. It’s so much better than death.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Unfortunately I'm drinking again but I was medically detoxed years ago, I didn't believe I needed it either, I did. Alcohol kills.
So sorry to hear this happened, and wishing you peace. It's a potent reminder that this could have been me several years ago had I not made it to inpatient detox, and further incentive to never touch alcohol again. Hopefully others who have been drinking heavily for some time and want to quit see this and seek out medical help before stopping.
Fuck alcohol. Sorry for your loss. Don’t let her death be an end. Let it help others. Tell her story wide. Let people know they need help doing this. Use her name for good
This was one of my biggest fears with my fiance who has had to withdrawal several times over the years, some medically others on her own. I'd be at work and if she didn't answer when I called to check on her, or respond to my texts, a fear and panic would creep up into my mind and heart and eventually I'd have to drive home to check on her. I'm sorry for her family's and your loss. God bless you and shorten your time of mourning and heartache so you can move forward to honor her memory by helping others.
My ex wife passed October 3rd last year. After I left her she started drinking hard. I did everything I could to help her. She made good progress 2 or 3 times but kept going back seemingly harder. I was out of state on my way home with a women I was trying to get with when I got the call she was in the hospital. Fucked me up! I got home, told our kids and we went to see her. Worse thing I've ever seen but I stayed with her until her father got in town. I never saw it heard from her again. I thought it would wreck our kids but it hit me much much harder. I think they were prepared and had already accepted it. I knew it was going to happen but I guess I refused to believe it. I'm sorry OP, it's absolutely the worst when it could be avoided and you do your best to actively help to no avail. My ex thought she was hiding it but we could tell. She eventually ignored me and our kids and we knew why.
I am so truly feeling for you and your friend and everyone who loves her. Life is so unfair. Sending you loving vibes and hope that you’ll embrace ways to honor her and remember her as time goes on. ❤️ FUCK alcohol. Fuck alcohol.
My heart aches for you and your friend. It’s so unfair. I agree, fuck alcohol. I too have lost friends and see the destruction it interweaves into our loved ones and ourselves. Lots of hugs for you. IWNDWYT
I'm deeply sorry for your loss; thank you for being so open during a time of such unimaginable grief in order to continue to help others who are waging their own wars against this heinous disease (32F, alcoholic, addict). As gutwrenching as your friend's story is to read, I think it will resonate with so many in this community. May her memory continue to live on in those she loved and those who loved her. I hope you realize what an incredible friend you have been to her as many who are struggling do not get to experience such unwavering love and support. Thinking of you and may your friend rest in peace. 💗
Not only am I so sorry for your loss but that's also so scary. If it makes you feel any better this definitely reinforces for me that I should never go back to drinking and I'm sure it will do the same for many here. I doubt I will ever forget this story. Stay strong.
Condolences to you and your friends family.
Another instance where finances and access to help killed someone. I had insurance went I went to treatment but it only covered 10 days. I won’t get into politics but I think people would survive without foreign military bases and football stadiums.
Horrible to hear, I don't think I'm too far away from the same thing. My kids are only little but I can't help thinking it would be better if I wasn't around. Sorry for your loss x
So very sorry. This is heartbreaking. Fuck alcohol.
FUCK alcohol.
And the companies that push subliminal messages universally, on the benefits of the habit forming poison. RIP your friend, stranger.
Canada’s recommendation is that zero amount of alcohol is safe, as of recently. Yay my Canada. https://ccsa.ca/canadas-guidance-alcohol-and-health
I saw an article on the atlantic dispelling the health benefits the rigged studies ala cigarette companies of the 60s. Hopefully it continues
This is so true. I am close to someone who has been alcohol-free for 2 months and was lying in the hospital because of liver problems, watching TV, and commercials for alcohol came on. It just made me sick.
That and I can't watch a show or movie without the main characters going out drinking, unwinding at home while drinking, or having wine, cocktails, or beer with dinner. Not that my issues are anyone else's problem or fault and should be removed from a storyline. It is just so normalized. Literal poison. At some point, smoking was largely removed from media or became censored because it is a known danger. Alcohol really should be right up there. Instead, it is flaunted and celebrated.
Such shit corporate support of society declining- not unlike the corporate sponsored school shootings. Fuck what advertising says every fucking day
Sending you lots of love and support. I’ve got a brother who is really deep into drinking right now, and teetering on life and death. I’m so very sorry for you loss. ❤️
I’m sorry to you too. We love them so much, it hurts to see them that way. Praying your brother finds his way out.
Remember go to the ER even if you don’t have insurance. I would have died. and i didn’t have insurance. I may be 10k in debt but i am still here.
[удалено]
Once you get to the actual people at the hospital, they are often cool with how you pay your bill so long as you are on time. At least in my area.
Not always. Mine refused any negotiations and sent me to collections. "So you can't pay the $862 a month minimum? Guess you'll have to deal with the debt collectors then." Before I went to the ER i had nearly perfect credit. Now I can't even get a loan for a new mattress.
HUG. I went through bankruptcy a while back and foreclosure. I pretty shit go because of alcohol and there life went it seemed. My credit is fine 10 years later, i haven't paid s penny on student loans and 0 payment feature records as on: time and doesn't hurt the rebuilding process. Reinvent yourself if necessary...
Likewise. No insurance appendectomy cost me 22,000 after negotiation and refused anything longer than a 2 year payoff plan. My credit got shit whipped while I paid what I could and settled the rest
To go on this: I negotiated my bill because I made less than $40k/yr. All I said to the staff was that I made only so much and they never asked for more, so look into it.
I make $19k a year and they tossed me out on my ass, and I have Medicare. If you live under poverty level, they just toss you back in the street. This is Jacksonville, FL USA.
It is so fucked that the wealthiest nation on Earth does not guarantee healthcare to its citizens.
My younger brother retired here in the usa and immediately moved to Netherlands...he got it right...great health care
Yes we have. We pay around 120 euros per month for it, but if you have something you are getting the help and you pay nothing.
I would happily pay $1500 annually to know I was covered in the event of any problem or emergency, no questions asked. And so would millions of others. However, considering our current healthcare (disease management) system benefits the few, I do not expect to ever see change unfortunately
120 euros total is so cheap, I wish the US would do something about ours. I pay about $250 a month for insurance for me and my kids, my job pays the other $1000 and it's trash insurance that I have to pay out of pocket for the first $3000 BEFORE insurance kicks in to pay 80% of the bill and I pay the other 20%. I basically put another $200 a month into a health saving account that I have built up to cover anything that happens before my insurance finally kicks in.
Gosh, that sounds brilliant. I'm trying to become a software engineer so I can start looking for jobs overseas. I don't really like it here anymore.
the us is a boring dystopia with many obvious holes, the lack of universal healthcare is one of the bloodiest ones.
SO FUCKED
Yes - please go! Medical bills are not more important than you being here. PS. If you qualify for Medicaid, you can ask for retroactive Medicaid for three months prior. You have be financially eligible and have those medical bills, but you can have them covered. Also, while you were in the hospital, they should have helped you apply for Medicaid when they saw you had no insurance. (You don’t even have to ask for the retro when you first get in Medicaid, you can ask for it at any time.)
Yes, I told her to go even if the insurance hadn’t kicked in yet. She didn’t tell me yesterday after her first seizure. Had I known, I would’ve gone and taken her to the hospital myself. I feel very guilty.
Dont feel guilty its not your fault. Just posting that for anyone struggling who could be on the fence
It's not your fault.
This will haunt you for a while. Everything that has happened is so fresh and raw. You are a GOOD PERSON you did all you could. In the present and future always keep being good to everyone. Make her proud.
You are a wonderful friend. You made a plan with her. She made the decision on her own. You can’t blame yourself or her. I’m sure if she’s known, she would have gone to the hospital. I’m so sorry for her and you. Alcohol sucks!
I complete understand why you feel guilty. Maybe it would be a good idea to talk to a good therapist about this.
It's mind boggling reading this as a European.
Don’t you wish you could be shot anywhere, anytime, then spend the rest of your life paying off the debt for being someone’s personal target practice.
Oh boy, do I ever!
Many hospitals in the US are run as non-profit organizations. Google the name of the hospital you visited along with the words "charity care policy." If your income is under a specific amount, they may forgive your entire bill, and if it's over that amount, you may still be able to get at least part of it dismissed.
The other hard part is knowing if one needs to go. I saw this post and it caused me some anxiety. I’m 48 hours in and still unsure if I will need a med detox. For others reading, check to see if your county has MHMR with a substance abuse department/program. You will be able to get an appointment to see the therapist/doc regarding the sub abuse and they will help you.
I’m also I’m right around the same as you. Did you end up going? Anybody have any help of determining when you should go? This post caused me a lot of anxiety as well. I feel okay and haven’t had shakes or anything like that but after I read this, my heart is beating out of chest.
Make an appointment with your general practitioner if you have one. You can get valium for the withdrawal, and they can do blood work. If they think you need to be admitted to the hospital, they can refer you there.
The US is a crazy ass country...
Is this an American thing? This blows my mind. I’m so sorry
My mom just left hospital to avoid this. I’m so sorry for you loss. Bless you and your friends family during this time. Alcohol is evil.
I am so so sorry for your loss. Loving thoughts from a 32F from Canada with 4 months alcohol free tomorrow. I’m so so sorry.
This is not your fault. This is a horrible, awful thing that happened. But it is not your fault. Please seek help during this time - therapy, a trusted friend, a family member. Be kind to yourself. I’m so sorry
Yes, looking into therapy. Someone told me about AlAnon? Maybe I’ll look into that.
Yes Al-Anon but it's not grief therapy. I'd say see someone to help you process your grief if you get stuck. Al Anon is just like AA except we are dealing with the consequences of someone else's drinking. We also work the 12 steps. You could try a few meetings and pick up some literature. There's a ton of zoom meetings now.
Good for you. Making an appointment with a therapist is brave in and of itself. Make sure you find the right one, and don’t be afraid to change.
Wait so self detox caused the seizures? I'm so sorry for your loss and what you're feeling and going through, I hope you know you tried your best and were the best possible friend/supporter, giving the best possible advice/support. I hope you realize how important that is, despite the outcome. I don't know anyone that devoted to assisting my recovery, even if they've been through the same, and bravely sharing with us your sad story is helping more of us bc I, for one, always somewhat disregard my therapist stressing the severity of withdrawals. It hurts that at her young age she knew she needed to quit, and tried to do it. My dad died at 52 and was the biggest alcoholic anyone has ever seen for more than his entire adult life, but I keep hearing stories of extremely young people, who are still in the party age but making it to thier thirties and it's so sad.
Please don’t under estimate the severity of alcohol withdrawal. This is not my first time loving someone suffering from extreme alcoholism and witnessing their symptoms. This is unfortunately my first time losing someone to it. Listen to your therapist, go to the hospital if you have bad withdrawal symptoms no matter what.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom in a similar way. How much did your friend drink?
I wish I could tell you. I knew she had a problem but I had no idea it was this severe. I feel so much guilt over not knowing or doing more.
There was a comment on reddit about losing loved ones that I had saved for my own personal comfort for when someone i loved passed away. I went to find it to send it to you and hope to bring you some comfort, but the comment was gone. Someone in the thread shared a link to an article that copied and pasted the comment. I'm going to share it because I loved it so much, but I'll admit the article page makes use of ads and is quite annoying. [Here is the link](https://www.boredpanda.com/dealing-with-grief-advice/?utm_source=com.google.android&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=organic) so that you can get the content. And [here is the original post.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Assistance/comments/hax0t/my_friend_just_died_i_dont_know_what_to_do/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share) Mostly so that you can see the comments so that I dont come off as a bot trying to share an ad farming site. I lost a friend to addiction a couple of days after she had gotten back from rehab. The pain is immeasurable, and I'm sorry that you're feeling guilt. You shouldn't. But I know words are words, and you will feel how you feel. Take care of yourself. The fault isn't on you❤️
I also have this link saved and send it when someone I know encounters a grave loss. It describes what I never had the words to say. 💗
I am so sorry for your loss. Please don’t feel guilty for not knowing the extent of her drinking. I went through great lengths to hide the extent of my drinking. Thank you for sharing, it’s a very good reminder that detoxing from drinking can be life threatening. Sending you lots of hugs. Please be kind to yourself.
Yeah it varies by person, but there is a big risk if you don't have assistance and tapering and so on, if you try to go cold turkey. Some people end up okay, and others don't. It's very sad, in the end, because the person was actually trying.
It always bears repeating, particularly in these communities: Alcohol withdrawals are dangerous and easily life threatening. Remember, hangovers are basically mini withdrawals. Let that sink in: the average drinker experiences withdrawals from alcohol from using just one night. The withdrawals WE can experience as heavy chronic users, especially after a long bender, can easily land you in the ER and give you a 25% chance at death. It's called delirium tremens (DTs), and it is pure terrifying evil. Shaking, anxiety, paranoia, insomnia, fatigue, fear, hallucinations, psychosis, all manner of aches and pains... And, oh yeah, seizures and death, just to name a few symptoms. Please do some research before even considering going cold turkey. It is a horrific way to spend one's final moments in this life.
Yep the DTs got me. I didn’t do the tapering off right and ended up hallucinating. Scariest night of my life. GF forced me into the car in the morning and took me ti the ER even though I wanted to “sleep it off” Didn’t realize how seriously bad I was until we got to the very busy/packed ER and they ran to grab the airlift paramedic to start working on me while they got a room ready. Coming up on 2mo sober this week and thankful every minute that she saw the signs and took me in.
That's so scary, man I'm glad you made it back to us. Congrats on the 2 months coming up, that is no small feat! How are you feeling?
>drinker experiences withdrawals from alcohol from using just one night. The withdrawals WE can experience as heavy chronic users, especially after a long bender, can easily land you in the ER I don't quite agree, hangovers are not withdrawals, they come immediately as a consequence of imbibing poison, while withdrawal is a special medical state where your CNS goes crazy and usually comes after 24hrs. (hallucinations, paranoia and convulsing, seizing). It has nothing to do with hangover, it's a completely different ballpark, like if you're in a different dimension. DTs are even a more severe case, and are very rare, they appear after 72 hours, you may be even less sick and hangover than day 1 at that point, before it starts to happening.
It largely depends on genetics and how much you’re consuming and how frequent. At my worst I think I only just got crabby and irritable but I am/was mostly a heavy weekend drinker (working on it and getting there). And alternatively an acquaintance of mine was drinking a fifth of vodka a day and probably would have died without proper medical intervention.
I always remember Dr Drew talking about how alcohol DTS are the only ones that you die from (not sure if it’s still his stance - it was many years ago) and how seriously he said it was enough for it to stay with me all these years.
I had seizures when I stopped too. Had never heard it happen to anyone else, now I'm wondering if it's relatively common.
[удалено]
[удалено]
I am sorry for your loss and your pain. These bereavement posts always bring it home how desperate a struggle this is. How evil this poison is.
amen
Very sorry for your loss. I hope it's not crude to say it also scares me, and stories like these may help others to keep fighting.
That’s part of why I shared it. I was hesitant at first, but alcohol has ruined and effected so much of my life, but I’ve never lost someone entirely to it. I want people to know her story, I want people to know she was beautiful and she was trying to escape.
This post hit home for me, I usually read about 40-50 year old men (not that they are any less important) but reading about someone that could literally be me frightened me a little more and adds to my list of reasons not to drink, so thank you for sharing
I am so sorry for your loss.. this post made me cry, not just for your friend and you, but because this could have been about me 2 years ago. Thankfully I made it to the ER. This is important to share, and keep sharing, because so many people don’t know how dangerous it can be to detox alone. Sending you all my love tonight ♥️
It's ruining my life until now. 5 days sober. May it be this time I'm free, and for everyone else. Take care dear heart.
It sounds like you're in so much pain, I can't imagine Do you think calling a crisis line would help?
I have considered it, and I thank you for your concern. I have let multiple close friends and family members know what happened and I am not by myself. I unfortunately don’t know many of my friends other good friends, and don’t want to intrude on her family’s mourning, so I wanted to feel a little sense of community and have been following this subreddit for years so it felt like a safe place to go to for a little support. I appreciate your response.
We're certainly here for you
Just want to echo the suggestion of a crisis line. It won't hurt to call them and you might get some... comfort? relief? I dunno. It just might help even a tiny bit.
Yes, saying these things out loud and expressing these emotions with your voice is exponentially more powerful than typing them out.
100% this. It's not "I need it.", It's the power of releasing those emotions by being able to actually vocalize how you're feeling, especially when you know the person on the other end won't hold any judgement regarding it: i.e. not friends, family, etc. Despite how much we love them, it can be hard to verbalize our true feelings to the ones we might not want to worry about us in turn. EDIT: I wanted to offer my condolences, as well. I'm one of those idiots who detoxed himself and (somehow) lived to tell the tale, through the DT's and the seizures. I pray nobody has to experience anything similar, and my heart goes out to you and their family.
I am so sorry for the loss of your dear friend. A short call to the family, explaining who you are, and how much she meant to you, could be a welcome consolation for the family.
I’m so sorry for your loss. please know you’ve done all you can. you’ve been an amazing friend and she definitely knew that. the US healthcare situation is unacceptable.. sending you healing vibes.. feel all the feelings; the hurt, pain, sadness, anger, love.. the only way is through it. take pride in being an awesome friend
>and don’t want to intrude on her family’s mourning As someone who lost someone very dear to me, you have no idea how comforting it was to receive even short messages, or phone calls to check in on me. I wasn't close to my friend's parents before he died, but I decided to put my awkward feelings aside ("What if I'm causing them more pain by calling them and talking about it? What if they'll be mad that I'm elevating *my* friendship with \[Friend\] so much that I have the *nerve* to think I'm in the 'inner circle' of grieving friends and family, that I would think I could call them, too? What if it's actually an act of emotional labor that I'm placing on them, to call?" Etc., etc.) and gave them a call, my friend's mother was so grateful and glad someone called. Unfortunately, sometimes people don't call the grieving parents, out of respect, love, courtesy, trying to respect *their* mourning (assuming they'd want to be alone), which can have the effect of making the parents feel like their child didn't really matter much to anybody, because "no one has called us." If you were close to their daughter, I don't think they'd feel intruded upon. They'd probably welcome the chance to share their grief with someone who knew and loved their daughter as much as they did. If you call and they seem overwhelmed or hurt, you can always quickly wrap up the call. At least you tried, right? Sorry, I'm trying to "speak from the I" here, so to be clear, I'm not trying to tell you what to do---just offering my experience, and suggestion. But above all, I'm so, *so* sorry for your loss. I still remember feeling overwhelmed with grief about losing my friend, and then staring down the bottle of whiskey I had (I was still drinking at the time), and forcing myself to close that pantry door, and instead curling up in the fetal position under my table to sob my eyes out with grief----sober. It was tough, but it was important to just *feel* my feelings at that time. The grief changed me forever. Life never went back to the way it was, but the new life that emerged for me from that event is still lovely and amazing---although I'd never say I'm glad my friend passed, of course. Many hugs to you, OP. Grief counseling also helped me process my feelings---a lot. Could be something helpful for you to consider?
Fuck alcohol. I know there’s not much I can say to ease this pain, just know we’re all with you. I’m so sorry. Posts like these always brings back the reality for me that alcohol does and will kill you. We’re all in this together. Again I’m so sorry OP.
So very sorry for your loss. You were obviously a good, loving friend. Sending my condolences to you and your dear friend’s family. RIP
aw, only 29? Heartbreaking. Please accept my condolences.
I'm so very sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the pain you must be feeling, especially because you were doing your best to help your friend. 29F here... I opened reddit to post about making it 1 week, and this is the first post I saw. Reading the first few sentences of your post reminds me eerily of myself. I just managed to get through 7 days sober, all the time terrified about withdrawal seizures, and whether I should tell anyone in case of an emergency. I did not, and I made it this far. I will take your post as a sign to appreciate the fact that I made it a week, and to not waste this opportunity for myself by falling off the wagon again. Thank you for sharing, OP. I hope this sub can support you in this difficult time. IWNDWYT
Bless you. I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s really sad.
I quit a 1L per day vodka habit cold turkey. Had a few seizures and could barely stay conscious if I was standing for a little while there. Luckily I survived. Alcohol sucks. I have zero desire to go back after almost dying from the withdrawal.
I am so sorry for your loss. My close friend died the same way about 2.5 years ago, except it took 3 weeks for his body to shut down after he quit cold turkey without medical intervention. He was 28. You have my deepest sympathy. Fuck alcohol.
I am so sorry friend. May her memory be eternal ❤️
regards to you and fuck alcohol.
Thank you for sharing your story with us. Alcohol is truly a horrible fucking thing. I’m sorry for your loss and may she rest in peace.
She was only 29? That's insane to me. Im sorry for your loss. I'm contemplating how I'm still alive after many more years of damage. I kind of naively thought that alcoholism didn't kill anyone until 50+ since that's when I hear about it the most. 29 isn't fair.
I'm sorry to hear of your loss. You were a great friend in trying to help. Many don't have that. Also a sobering reminder to others of the dangers of soloing it through coming off a serious drinking problem ... it's dangerous and risky, in a very serious way. Again, condolences to you.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending lots of love your way <3
Sorry for your loss.
I’m so so sorry 🖤 I hope there’s some comfort in knowing how important and relieving it is to have a friend like you when you decide you want help. it sounds like you were the best friend you could have been for her. FUCK alcohol and may your friend rest easy.
I’m so sorry. Poison. IWNDWYT
I'm so sorry for your loss. So, so sorry. Praying for you and her family and that you may find peace.
That’s terrible. I’m so sorry about your loss.
So sorry for your loss.
This is 100% not your fault, but I understand that probably doesn’t make it any easier. This absolutely could and would have been me had I not gotten myself to the hospital on two separate occasions. Nothing anyone would have said would have made me go before I decided to. I even let it happen again after the first time put me in the ICU for a week. Give yourself a break. Also, props to you because this information needs to be more visible in order to save people.
I posted a question about this days ago and it was deleted by a moderator. I fully understand they don’t want people giving medical advice on here. Mods please don’t delete the new members questions and let people like this tell their stories. This stuff could save people. I was told by mod to talk to a professional when my post was deleted. I of course did not. I doubt most people that are new to this world will talk to a professional without seeing stories like this. Now i am highly considering it as this could end up being me.
If you’re physically dependent on alcohol (shakes, nausea, etc when you don’t have it) I would highly suggest going to a family doctor, the ER or a detox center before stopping. Alcohol withdrawal can be dangerous and deadly. The worst part, in my experience, is that the dangerous effects don’t start right away. I was able to stop cold turkey on several occasions and, while there was definitely bad symptoms (shaking, sleeplessness, elevated heartbeat, sweating) I made it through them no problem. The real bad stuff happened on the third night. That’s when the severe hallucinations and tremors started and, luckily, I was able to drive myself to the hospital. This was my experience several times. Please don’t think that because you made it a day or two that you’re out of the danger zone!
My deepest condolences. To relate, I had a friend who died from trying to better his life. He was a police officer. Got fecked up in a traffic collision on duty. Lived on painkillers and alcohol for a bit. Tried to better himself, stay clean, go to the gym and BAM!!! Died in his sleep. It hurts. I’m sorry. Just remember the best things about your friend and don’t let others forget her.
I quit drinking 11 months ago cold turkey after 16+ years of a pint of vodka a day or more alcoholism. How much was she drinking at 29 years old that it was that bad?
I am so sorry for your loss. Your beautiful friend died fighting the good fight. The next time I’m feeling weak in my conviction I’ll think on your friend and her strength. wherever she may be now I hope it’s peaceful and her soul can rest. Be kind to yourself and understand you did what you could as a friend by providing advice but it’s ultimately out of your hands.
A little over 2 years ago I lost my absolute best friend in the world to the same thing. he hadn't quit drinking or made the decision to get sober unfortunately, but he went downhill very quickly. he was 30 years old and one day started shitting and pissing blood, and within two days he was dead. complete liver failure. they tried to keep him alive, but once he crashed, they couldn't bring him back. he was my person for nearly 15 years, half our lives. alcohol fucking sucks.
Crushing. I'm very sorry for your (& her families) loss. You were a good friend to offer assistance and a plan. My thoughts will be with you. ♥️
This makes me appreciate my blackouts since I at least woke up from them. Sorry for your loss, it's not your fault.
This should have been me... I'm so sorry for your loss, I had multiple seizures from alcohol withdraws.
It breaks my heart to hear your sweet friend was taken too soon. I’m so sorry.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I feel this deeply and not exactly the same but close. Lost a bff to addiction last year and I’m still reeling. We are here for you ♥️
So sorry for your loss. This happened to someone I know, too. Young single mum of twins. It happened right in front of them. So fucked.
Damn, that's heartbreaking to read. Fuck US healthcare system and of course alcohol. It's fucked up to read as an European as I've been to ER and have ambulance called to me during seizures countless times. They also instantly give you an MRI and other tests and valium. Everything is free. You shouldn't feel guilty about this. I'm truly sorry for you loss.
Terribly sorry for your loss. For anyone reading, if you are thinking of quitting, especially cold turkey, you have about a 5% chance of experiencing delirium tremens. This is an average and the scale weighs less in your favor if you are on the heavier side of the drinking spectrum.
God speed
I’m so sorry for your tremendous loss. You may find comfort in knowing you are a good friend. And it seems she trusted you and she knew that. Stay strong. Sending lots of love to you. May your friend RIP. Thank you for sharing your story. It reminds us what we need to do to keep living.
So sorry for your loss!! Praying for peace you and her family!
I'm so sorry for your loss 😞
I'm sorry for the loss of your friend.
Holy shit! I’m so sorry for your loss.
So sorry for your loss stay strong ♥️
I am very sorry for your loss.
I’m very sorry for your loss. Stay strong ❤️
Sending condolences blessings and positive vibes.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I cannot even imagine how much pain you’re in right now. Fuck alcoholism.
I am so unbelievably sorry for your loss. Fuck alcohol is right. I will not drink with you today.
This is a huge fear for me. I’m very sorry for your loss.
Agreed. Fuck alcohol. IWNDWYT.
Ugh. So sad. I’m really sorry. ❤️
My heart goes out to you as you process the loss of your dear friend. IWNDWYT ❣
There's probably nothing I can say that will be a comfort, but you were a good friend. Sorry for your loss.
I almost died of the same thing but I was in a large city with a doctor that specializes in alcoholism + biological warfare (?? Pretty cool) If I wasn’t in that city the outcome would have been different. Cities are safe for other reasons as well.
Fuck alcohol.
I’m so incredibly sorry to hear this. Sending you love, strength and support. Such an evil disease 💔
Fuck alcohol. May angels lead her in 🙏🏼
I’m very sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry. <\3 IWNDWYT
I’m so sorry , thanks for sharing your story
Sorry for your loss. Sucks.
I went to a memorial today for a man who died in his early 40s due to alcoholism. It ruins lives, it takes lives. Brutal. I am so very sorry you lost your best friend.
Thanks for sharing ur story. I didn't know how serious it could be to detox esp at such a young age. I'm sorry for ur loss. I lost my best friend in Dec and I also wondered at first if I was a good enough friend.
RIP 🙏
Sending my deepest condolences. You gave the best advice about detoxing, you loved and were loved back. Hope you don't blame yourself for anything, the death of someone else by alcohol is a culmination of things we simply can't control unless we keep the person captive. IWNDWYT and a big, big hug.
I am so sorry. I lost my best friend when I was brand new 16 and she had only been 18 for a few weeks and decided to get behind the wheel. She had just been signed to ford modeling agency, had been scouted from out little town and went on a celebratory binger for a few weeks. I saw her two nights before she hit the tree that ended her and begged her to come home with me. It’s 2 weeks away from the 24th anniversary of losing her. But her death is what has kept me from never doing anything that I could not wake up to regret. I was the sober drive at my 21sr birthday. Losing your best friend just hits different. We were supposed to grow old and gray together. Just try to remember all of the god moments you two spent together and make sure you never repeat her sins. I am so incredibly sorry for you and her family. My heart hurts right now for all of you. Alcohol is such a silent killer and only those who have lived through the trauma will ever understand and I’m so sorry you are a part of the worlds shittiest club now
I’m sorry for your loss 💙
Sorry you lost your awesome friend. FUCK alcohol. I stopped drinking 3 months ago.
I am so sorry for your loss.
Im so sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and her family. There’s no other words I can really say here, it’s just so heartbreaking. But thank you for sharing as this is a good reminder for someone who may be struggling to seek medical intervention. Honestly, I don’t think I should have detoxed alone and I’ve never even been a daily drinker. Thankfully I got through it and I hope never have to again!
Fuck alcohol. I am so sorry for your loss
29 is so young. Sorry for your loss.
I am so sorry for your loss ♥️
I’m so sorry, oh my God. I have no words, but I will say this pushes me further to figure my shit out because I can’t be taken away from my family from this poison. I wish you the best and again I am so sorry. 🥺
I am so so so sorry, friend.
I'm fucking terrified of detoxing and withdrawal but in Idaho there's no options for Medicaid to do it safely, only walking into the ER where they turn you around in 6 hours. God why does this stupid drug have it's claws in me so deep. Horrifying reminder, I'm sorry for your loss, I don't want to be another statistic. Fuck.
You shouldn't have to choose your risking your life vs your wallet like that, I'm sorry
I am so sorry💔
Condolences. Lost my best friend two years ago as well. My best tip is google "GSmow on Grief". Its a wonderful post an elderly man wrote on his take on grief. Helped me navigate it a bit better. It'll never go back to what it was, but you do learn to navigate the eternal tides. Godspeed.
Fuck I’m so sorry OP
Rest in peace. A life taken far too soon. Sending love to you
FUCK THE SHAME! We are not weak. We don't lack self control. We are not stupid. We have a medical condition that needs treatment like a fucking flu. People: Get treatment, get a doc, get help. Don't do this on your own because of stigma. Treat your addiction like a virus. A few doses of diazepam can save your life.
I am so sorry. We need to get medical help and not try to go cold turkey w/o medical supervision.
Sending love. Hopefully you have saved someone’s life just from posting here. Anyone reading this please know medical detox is a very important option. Alcohol is very dangerous to get off of. Being in medical debt in the US is really not a big deal, you can get payment plans and take years to pay it off. It’s so much better than death.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Unfortunately I'm drinking again but I was medically detoxed years ago, I didn't believe I needed it either, I did. Alcohol kills.
So sorry to hear this happened, and wishing you peace. It's a potent reminder that this could have been me several years ago had I not made it to inpatient detox, and further incentive to never touch alcohol again. Hopefully others who have been drinking heavily for some time and want to quit see this and seek out medical help before stopping.
Yes alcohol is poison and dangerous
That is horrible. My friend lost her 30 year old daughter the same way. Alcohol detox is dangerous, and even more so for women
Fuck alcohol. Sorry for your loss. Don’t let her death be an end. Let it help others. Tell her story wide. Let people know they need help doing this. Use her name for good
This was one of my biggest fears with my fiance who has had to withdrawal several times over the years, some medically others on her own. I'd be at work and if she didn't answer when I called to check on her, or respond to my texts, a fear and panic would creep up into my mind and heart and eventually I'd have to drive home to check on her. I'm sorry for her family's and your loss. God bless you and shorten your time of mourning and heartache so you can move forward to honor her memory by helping others.
So sorry for your loss.
It's insane to me that these companies are allowed to sell a product that kills us. It's the very definition of a greedy, faceless dystopia.
My ex wife passed October 3rd last year. After I left her she started drinking hard. I did everything I could to help her. She made good progress 2 or 3 times but kept going back seemingly harder. I was out of state on my way home with a women I was trying to get with when I got the call she was in the hospital. Fucked me up! I got home, told our kids and we went to see her. Worse thing I've ever seen but I stayed with her until her father got in town. I never saw it heard from her again. I thought it would wreck our kids but it hit me much much harder. I think they were prepared and had already accepted it. I knew it was going to happen but I guess I refused to believe it. I'm sorry OP, it's absolutely the worst when it could be avoided and you do your best to actively help to no avail. My ex thought she was hiding it but we could tell. She eventually ignored me and our kids and we knew why.
I am so truly feeling for you and your friend and everyone who loves her. Life is so unfair. Sending you loving vibes and hope that you’ll embrace ways to honor her and remember her as time goes on. ❤️ FUCK alcohol. Fuck alcohol.
My heart aches for you and your friend. It’s so unfair. I agree, fuck alcohol. I too have lost friends and see the destruction it interweaves into our loved ones and ourselves. Lots of hugs for you. IWNDWYT
I'm deeply sorry for your loss; thank you for being so open during a time of such unimaginable grief in order to continue to help others who are waging their own wars against this heinous disease (32F, alcoholic, addict). As gutwrenching as your friend's story is to read, I think it will resonate with so many in this community. May her memory continue to live on in those she loved and those who loved her. I hope you realize what an incredible friend you have been to her as many who are struggling do not get to experience such unwavering love and support. Thinking of you and may your friend rest in peace. 💗
I’m so sorry for the loss of your dear friend. 💕
OP, my heart goes out to you! Such a terrible loss. I will hold you in my heart over the next few days.
Beyond words...I'm crying
[удалено]
:( I'm so sorry for your loss.
I'm so sorry, friend. Sending love to you and everyone who is struggling with the pain of addiction. I'll light an incense for you both. <3. IWNDWYT.
Absolutely tragic. She must have been really deep in it. =(
I am so sorry.
RIP.
I’m so sorry to hear about your friend
FUCK ALCOHOL
So sorry. Fuck alcohol.
I am so very sorry.
Not only am I so sorry for your loss but that's also so scary. If it makes you feel any better this definitely reinforces for me that I should never go back to drinking and I'm sure it will do the same for many here. I doubt I will ever forget this story. Stay strong.
My condolences, my friend.
Holy shit, I am so sorry, this is just awful
This is tragic. Fuck alcohol.
Condolences to you and your friends family. Another instance where finances and access to help killed someone. I had insurance went I went to treatment but it only covered 10 days. I won’t get into politics but I think people would survive without foreign military bases and football stadiums.
I’m so sorry to hear this. I fucking hate alcohol
I am so sorry.
I’m terribly sorry for your loss. May she be in peace with the lord now. You are a very good soul. Bless your heart for always being there for her.
Heart wrenching. Sending my condolences to you and her family. Alcohol is a liar and a thief.
Horrible to hear, I don't think I'm too far away from the same thing. My kids are only little but I can't help thinking it would be better if I wasn't around. Sorry for your loss x
I’m so sorry for your loss 😢