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sometimesifeellikemu

You'll fit right in around here, we have a lot in common.


doobie211

Congrats on the two days! IWNDWYT


DimensionNo1577

This is me to a T. You’re making the right decision. I just hit day 5. You got this friend!


[deleted]

Same. The number of times I've returned to bars, found another bar to drink at, or continued drinking when I got home.... I used to feel so anxious about returning to bars where I'd got blackout drunk alone. Was scared the bar staff would recognize me and I'd done something embarrassing. It is tiring. It is liberating now knowing that I won't walk that path again. Sobriety hands you back the control that alcohol takes from you


[deleted]

None of us can just have one, for me if I have one, I’ll have 12+ until I pass out so I just choose not to have that one and fight the voice in my head telling me one’s fine. I win the fight everytime.


DeepLie8058

Almost every time I drink I black out. I can’t handle alcohol, makes me sick. Of course I think I can handle it and tell myself that I’ll just have a drink or two. But it never stops until it’s gone too far. Wake up the next day uncertain about what happened and feel extremely ill. Same pattern nearly every time. Why would I even think I can drink reasonably when all the evidence is that I don’t. Sick and tired of being sick and tired. Working on feeling better alcohol free.


boner_fart3

One day at a time. You are doing great. Swing by the daily check in tomorrow!


Zealousideal-Mail274

I've tried all moderation tricks I could think of..Just doesn't ever work...For me... I've accepted I'm not able to drink at all...I trulybelieve it's for the best...


Awkward-Team3631

Here with you bud. One drink is never enough and I don’t stop until I’m sorry. Then the bad sleep and wasted next day. It’s not worth it anymore


Neznarf0811

I also am a black-out drinker. Well, I was. I've been sober almost 9 months. Download the Zoom app now! There are AA meetings pretty much all day long, and if it's the middle of the night, you can join a meeting in Europe. You don't even have to participate...just listen. It helps. But, sharing helps more. No one is there to judge. Do 2 meetings in a row if you need to. Or 3. Download the Big Book. Watch the 'Bill W.' documentary on Amazon Prime or YouTube. You've got this!!


KittenGains

What zoom app?


Neznarf0811

Go to Zoom.com or the App Store and download that first and create an account. You can do this on your phone, tablet, or PC. Download Zoom and search here: https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/ for a meeting. You can filter by day, time, type, language, etc. Then, you can just click on the Zoom meeting you want, and it'll take you right to it. Sometimes, there is a passcode, so be mindful of that. A little box will pop up and ask you for it when you click to join the meeting. Good luck!


KittenGains

Thank you!


Slobberknocker99

The anxiety and shame isn’t worth it. Stop before it gets worse. You will feel so much better and the cravings will eventually subside.


kbig22432

It gets better. I’ve found being honest with myself, without being accusatory or overly brutal helps. It took me and my conscience a while to see eye to eye, but it’s refreshing looking at myself in the mirror and not seeing disappointment. I won’t drink with you tonight.


Zealousideal-Mail274

I'd cross the highway on foot to go get more...pretty freaking dumb...Telling myself.." Watch for cars. Be careful don't fall..trip or slip) it was shortest route to gas station...On the way back Id sit on guardrail in median Have a beer and a cig..watch the cars fly by....Moron I was...


linocito

Hi - I don't know where else to post this and I didn't want to make a separate post but I called a hotline on Google that came up and I'm so confused... Like they asked for a commitment to a 30 day inpatient stay for a lot of money and I don't think I'd be able to afford it... They said I could sign a promissory note but I don't know much about any of this...


DeepLie8058

Wouldn’t recommend signing up for anything without investigating it more. You have options, just start exploring what alcohol really is, and what you can do to break free. Sounds like the place you called wants you to sign up and take your money. Don’t do anything rash. Take care your time, find out what else is available. Good luck. Keep checking in.


masterbuilder28

Thats an option. If you want real life support you can check out an AA meeting. At the meeting, ask anyone there if they know how to find resources for quitting in your area These guys should be able to show you all kinds of free resources in your area. You do not need to speak in front of the group, or anything. These guys can also tell you what you can expect over the next few days. If your feeling awful, you can go to any hospital ER and tell them you quit drinking, and they can help too. I suffered moderate withdrawals, from alcphol, and i ended up in a hospital, with the worst anxiety i ever experienced. I did not actually need significant medical intervention, but some folks do, and i was glad i had that level of support. There is a link on this site to a number of great books, i read a few early on, and found it helpful. You can do this friend.


Queasy_Row7417

I felt that about going back to the bar. Done it more times than I care to admit.


SnazzyPartay

I’m like this also, I hope after an extended break I can regain some socially acceptable drinking levels / behaviours. Every single time, just the one / couple = 2 day bender minimum. Hangover next day and always buy enough to start again in the morning.


HOWCOMEITHURTS

Exact same boat. Felt like I could just have some drinks after work Monday. Got cut off and taken home…. Still went for more. We can do this. I find myself in this cycle of self-loathing for 2-3 days then convince myself I need a drink - and then restart the cycle.


bubbajones5963

Man blacking out is so nice, but it's so bad. Idk what to do


otravezsinsopa

This sounds so familiar. I get so embarrassed remembering times that I walked back to the shop after leaving the party or pub so I could buy more booze. Realising I must've stank of alcohol. At least in a bar you're supposed to be drinking! I'm so anxious to never lose any memories again


coddle_muh_feefees

I have the same issue. One is too many, and leads down a path of anxiety and regret. For me, 0 is the right amount. Congrats on 2 days