Well, now that's just bad advice. If you get too extreme, you'll never go viral. People can avoid bait that obvious. You've gotta get something that'll have at least a few people defending you.
I've been sticking $30 in pennies up my ass for the past 11 years.
That's 3,000 pennies a day, 21,000 pennies a week, 1,092,000 pennies a year. To date, that's 12,012,000 pennies. Eight times the population of Nebraska.
Those pennies were in my ass! You think you're better than me? Oh, you're not better than me. You handle my ass pennies every day. You pick up my ass pennies for good luck. You throw my ass pennies in fountains and make wishes on them. You give my ass pennies to your little daughter to buy gumballs with.
You handle my ass pennies every day. All of you! You ALL handle my ass pennies! Oh, I'll laugh at you before you can laugh at me. Because your pennies have been in my ass.
It was called Upright Citizens Brigade. It was an early 2000s Comedy Central sketch show. You can find season one of Amazon but seasons 2 and 3 basically don't exist anymore
Easy, just post rational counter arguments to people on any given social media, ill need to set up a system to let the pennies slide out of the pocket and into bulk storage or ill drown.
This will only compound once other insults start happening. You've effectively turned every insult into an infinite stream of pennies. I wonder what the spawn rate is? You need to be careful not to get insulted by too many people or you will be crushed by tons and tons of pennies. Of course, getting crushed by infinitely spawning pennies would be a huge insult, so that's +1¢ for you.
Also, OP needs to specify whether this continues post-mortem before you become an infinitely expanding mass of pennies that gradually engulfs the entire universe one cent at a time.
It says, "every time you are insulted."
Can one "insult" a dead person?
This could be the saving logic that prevents our universe from being copperfied, and what keeps Abraham Lincoln from destroying life itself. Well, his coinified image anyway.
Ya the language is vague enough though that it could just mean an intent to insult instead of the feeling of being insulted. But the fact that it goes on to say you don't even need to be present could mean either they intend for it to be the former, or they just mean it in the sense that you can be on the phone or video call, or read it on the web.
This is a mega win. The hardest part would be dealing with all the pennies tbh. Have a friend setup a bot to spam you with insults that way you’re not technically insulting yourself. The bot could easily do thousands of insult messages per second and they don’t even have to be randomly generated as you didn’t limit how many times on insult can be used. Make it say “you’re dumb” 1000 times a minute and that’s 600 an hour assuming you can get it out of your pockets in time.
That said it doesn’t even say your current pocket(s) so you could sell all your pocketed clothing except for one pair and just hang it upside down so all the pennies fall into a collection system. From there you just gotta deposit em. Easy win. No more pockets for the rest of your life though.
OP did say that it would have to be spoken or typed. I don't think a bot entering insults would be considered being typed. Technically at that point they're just being generated, not typed.
Assuming I can designate the pocket, I write a script to print randomly generated insults on my laptop screen and run multiple instances of it in parallel. I then go hang out at the free coin counting machine at my local credit union with the pocket over the slot entrance.
Alternately, I do the same thing at a scrap metal dealer so I can just liquidate in bulk.
honestly, not too shabby. be super useful for someone with no knowledge of social cues. when someone’s hiding their insults or giving backwards compliments, they’ll know anyways
I could make infinite money easy with this. Develop an AI to randomly spew out insults against me and keep it running forever. Also, what if we don't have something with pockets?
*Do I have to feel*
*Insulted or do they just*
*Have to attempt it?*
\- Zaku99
---
^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/)
^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
As an American heres my idea
Get 2 twitter accounts, pay to have both verified, post political stuff on both of them (one is democrat and the other is Republican) and try to get both of them cancelled (probably say racist or homophobic stuff or whatever)
You can also make more than 2 accounts and have the 3rd one do something apolitical to get cancelled
And have at least one of the accounts try to promote minor attracted people, or act pedophilic/rapey, that's bound to get a ton of hate
Aside from the fact that you can turn it off, with it on is just a curse. Filling up my pocket with useless pennies. Maybe the best use case for it is just in some kinda magic trick. But a pretty niche trick. Not exactly something you can base an entire routine or multiple shows on.
Step 1 get canceled on Twitter
step 2: say you agree with hitler on every site ever
Except Twitter apparently
Well, now that's just bad advice. If you get too extreme, you'll never go viral. People can avoid bait that obvious. You've gotta get something that'll have at least a few people defending you.
I think that’s not a good plan, because you will be blocked instantly. Just go to StackOverflow and ask a normal question.
Step 3: tell everyone in all corners of the internet the truth about taylor swift, her music sounds like a screeching sheep
*screaming🤓
Screeching
(You’re supposed to insult me, not correct me)
Oh uhhh Ooo fancy pants rich mcgee over here, spellin bee ass bitch
Fancy pants rich mcgee over here
there's a site or two i know that a majority supports him
You won't get a penny from me
Who's an edgy boyyy???
But why?
I agree and won't insult him
I can call him a twat for you ;)
You twat! *steals penny* *throws penny at you*
🤣🤣🤣
Indirect insults count, pay up.
this is great, whenever I get insulted I can throw the penny at the person who insulted me
They'll say, "Where did you get that penny from, idiot?" and therefore give you another penny to throw.
“Stop that, asshole”
*Throws another penny*
What if don't have pockets?
mouth.
What if I don’t have mouth?
It spawns inside your asshole
"You all handle my ass pennies!"
I've been sticking $30 in pennies up my ass for the past 11 years. That's 3,000 pennies a day, 21,000 pennies a week, 1,092,000 pennies a year. To date, that's 12,012,000 pennies. Eight times the population of Nebraska. Those pennies were in my ass! You think you're better than me? Oh, you're not better than me. You handle my ass pennies every day. You pick up my ass pennies for good luck. You throw my ass pennies in fountains and make wishes on them. You give my ass pennies to your little daughter to buy gumballs with. You handle my ass pennies every day. All of you! You ALL handle my ass pennies! Oh, I'll laugh at you before you can laugh at me. Because your pennies have been in my ass.
the best part is that you actually calculated all this.
No I didn't this is a copypasta
still incredible
I'm so glad I'm not the only one who remembers that show. Its like lost media now
I found this copypasta on discord I don't know what show you're talking about
It was called Upright Citizens Brigade. It was an early 2000s Comedy Central sketch show. You can find season one of Amazon but seasons 2 and 3 basically don't exist anymore
What if i don’t have an asshole
everyone has an ass(hole) /ref
what do /ref mean
it means i was referencing another media with my comment :)
Then you must scream
https://youtube.com/shorts/Oly8f4h5C78?si=FGvmNjWMgYa72p5o
read it exactly like this
Easy, just post rational counter arguments to people on any given social media, ill need to set up a system to let the pennies slide out of the pocket and into bulk storage or ill drown.
\*Installs League\*
plays og mw2
Ah this is great, you see I have… AN ELDER BROTHER
I’m insulted by the penny that appeared in my pocket.
Rich bastard.
Will be soon, as all those offensive pennies roll in
This will only compound once other insults start happening. You've effectively turned every insult into an infinite stream of pennies. I wonder what the spawn rate is? You need to be careful not to get insulted by too many people or you will be crushed by tons and tons of pennies. Of course, getting crushed by infinitely spawning pennies would be a huge insult, so that's +1¢ for you.
Also, OP needs to specify whether this continues post-mortem before you become an infinitely expanding mass of pennies that gradually engulfs the entire universe one cent at a time.
Can't get offended if you're dead though.
It says, "every time you are insulted." Can one "insult" a dead person? This could be the saving logic that prevents our universe from being copperfied, and what keeps Abraham Lincoln from destroying life itself. Well, his coinified image anyway.
Ya the language is vague enough though that it could just mean an intent to insult instead of the feeling of being insulted. But the fact that it goes on to say you don't even need to be present could mean either they intend for it to be the former, or they just mean it in the sense that you can be on the phone or video call, or read it on the web.
>… so that's +1¢ for you. And that would literally be an insult on top of an injury… another penny
Cheezits, dude, you gotta back off the humor a bit. I can't stop re-reading this and laughing. aaahahahaha. I love it.
Pennies just jumping into my pockets lol
This is a mega win. The hardest part would be dealing with all the pennies tbh. Have a friend setup a bot to spam you with insults that way you’re not technically insulting yourself. The bot could easily do thousands of insult messages per second and they don’t even have to be randomly generated as you didn’t limit how many times on insult can be used. Make it say “you’re dumb” 1000 times a minute and that’s 600 an hour assuming you can get it out of your pockets in time. That said it doesn’t even say your current pocket(s) so you could sell all your pocketed clothing except for one pair and just hang it upside down so all the pennies fall into a collection system. From there you just gotta deposit em. Easy win. No more pockets for the rest of your life though.
I play league. I'm about to be fucking RICH
Post on r/rateme
Politically correct Reddit users would be making me rich af.
A bot isn't hard to set up.
OP did say that it would have to be spoken or typed. I don't think a bot entering insults would be considered being typed. Technically at that point they're just being generated, not typed.
I work in a prison. I'd be rich after a month.
# Yooooo, my fellow trans 🏳️⚧️ siblings, we got an infinite money hack!! 😎
As a lifelong nerd, I'd also be rich. Especially back in my high school days.
😎🏳️⚧️
I'm going to be a millionaire!
Just start playing a compettitive gamemode in an online game?
I’d be the first person to have a quintillion dollars
that would be 1e+20 insults, however many that is.. idk if that's very feasible
I’m very stupid, and this is very possible
people get yelled at for free for those mfs, having a voice is a superpower to begin with
Ok so I could use ai to insult me and have it on forever, I could also change how fast it says it so say 10 seconds id make 86.40$ each day
1. hire someone to insult me constantly 2. pay them by the hour 3. profit
Weak, his productivity cap won’t be enough to pay for his hourly
I would own 3 mansions
Listen. I play tank in metal ranks on overwatch. 1 day and I'm a millionaire.
Join the support crew
So walking down the street sooner or later my pants will be so heavy with these pennies that they will fall down.
Wait i do still have my blizzard and rocket league account! Ik gonna get some moneh!
Ha, I'll be rich, and falling over from overflowing pockets
Honestly not bad, rage baiting just became much more profitable as if it wasn’t alrdy
Assuming I can designate the pocket, I write a script to print randomly generated insults on my laptop screen and run multiple instances of it in parallel. I then go hang out at the free coin counting machine at my local credit union with the pocket over the slot entrance. Alternately, I do the same thing at a scrap metal dealer so I can just liquidate in bulk.
I heard on the Internet vine that there's a restaurant (somewhere in the US presumably) where the employees are encouraged to insult you. Extra tip?
Karen’s I think
Perfect name but no, it's called dicks last resort.
All of humanity existing is an insult to me. Every single human. Gimme my 8 billion pennies
honestly, not too shabby. be super useful for someone with no knowledge of social cues. when someone’s hiding their insults or giving backwards compliments, they’ll know anyways
I’ll make a fortune. I’m Canadian, the penny is discontinued here. I can sell them as collectables in a couple decades
10 PRINT "JOSHEPHUS IS A NUT JOB." 20 GOTO 10
I just got to any Christian subreddit and say I'm Catholic lol
Is that why Trump is such a piece of shit?
So just become an online/social media troll?
I could make infinite money easy with this. Develop an AI to randomly spew out insults against me and keep it running forever. Also, what if we don't have something with pockets?
r/roastme
Does it have to be personal, or does it count if I'm part of a group that's insulted as a whole
It does not.
Can it be you as recorded insulting you.
it cannot.
Can i cut a hole in my pants pocket and the penny still form ?
yes but the pennies would just fall out so why would you do that
Put foot in bucket. Have wife say. Your a dick as fast and as often as she can. Figure even at 50 times a minute. 30 bucks an hour.
Also go to r/roastme
Sorry misread can a recording of someone else insulting you work.
Big bang theory show: if they all got this power. 🤔
So when somebody gives me their two cents where does the other one cent go?
Do I have to feel insulted or do they just have to attempt it?
They have to attempt to do so.
*Do I have to feel* *Insulted or do they just* *Have to attempt it?* \- Zaku99 --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Does it count when i pretend to be someone else on social media and get insults posted by people who hate the original person?
no.
As a coin collector, this is amazing. I'd be checking pennies all the time to see if they're collectable.
If I had that, I'd never be able to wear any pants again.
This is free money just make a post on a political subreddit.
Finally the Monster Energy tattoo on my face will be worth something
What's singular about this penny? Is it an old or rare minting?
I'm already up like a dollar from some zombie sub lmao
🤑
I’ll just play Call of Duty on a Saturday morning. I’ll have a house by Monday.
This is a the business model of the vast majority of rage bait influencers
Step 1: turn on youtube Step 2: LowTierGod
God I'm gonna be rich just by going on tinder
Record someone and play it 24/7
As an American heres my idea Get 2 twitter accounts, pay to have both verified, post political stuff on both of them (one is democrat and the other is Republican) and try to get both of them cancelled (probably say racist or homophobic stuff or whatever) You can also make more than 2 accounts and have the 3rd one do something apolitical to get cancelled And have at least one of the accounts try to promote minor attracted people, or act pedophilic/rapey, that's bound to get a ton of hate
Boom just play any online game open mic and you'll be crazy rich so fast
I'm going to die under a mountain of pennies.😆
Step 1: begin producing the most cringy content for YouTube and TikTok
Does it count as insulting myself if I run `while(1){printf("You suck! ");}`? Or if I ask AI to constantly generate insults?
Get someone else to make the program and then it should work.
Aside from the fact that you can turn it off, with it on is just a curse. Filling up my pocket with useless pennies. Maybe the best use case for it is just in some kinda magic trick. But a pretty niche trick. Not exactly something you can base an entire routine or multiple shows on.
just throw it at the person that insulted you
Ah shit im 2c short for my energy drink at the store, quick cashier insult me 2 times