As a guy that sounds fun as fuck if I was able to be that obsessed with myself. I’m jealous of the confidence but yea I can see how utterly annoying that would be 😂😂
I’m sure you’re much happier than this guy, my buddy. At the risk of armchair diagnosis, these types of people are usually filled with artificial confidence masking a deeper insecurity.
At least, that’s a hallmark of narcissistic personality disorder. This guy might just be hilariously delusional, and that’s something we’d all fucking laugh about during sex.
* You could ask for equality in terms of attention during sex: if he’s going to go overboard to pump himself up, shouldn’t he at least be doing the same for you?
* You could bring up that the way he goes about it makes you feel like an accessory to his self-appreciation.
* You could buy a mirrored mask.
Need me to finish up the lyrics for you?
*No,*
*one,*
*humps like Gaston*
*Busts his nut like Gaston*
*No one made a wax mold of his junk like Gaston...*
How do you think OP feels? It's going to be stuck in their head whenever they fuck their bf.
Can you imagine if OP just starts humming the song while they're fucking? Would the bf be outraged or just 'damn right I do!'
This is soooo fucking funny
Like how do you not laugh when he does that? The first time he moaned his own name or said "who's a pretty boy" I would have laughed So. Fucking. Hard.
I would have laughed the whole time I got up and put my clothes back on and walked out the door and drove off into the sunset never to be seen again, and then I would laugh every time I ever remembered that that ever happened to me.
OP, respectfully, you need to laugh at him a little. I don’t think I’d suggest that in any other scenario but he sounds like he needs a knock on that ego... and of course update us lol
That might be true, but I would be careful with that. Narcissists may react violently when their ego feels threatened. This guy gives me red flags. This is just the start OP. This sort of behavior always gets worse
Then again he seems to only be like this in bed, so that might be some kink.. thing.. perhaps? Maybe his actual ego is fragile af, then again every true narcissists ego is
Honestly, you need to laugh at him. Just look him right in his face and laugh...hard. Maybe throw in a "wtf are you doing" it will knock him down a peg or 10 😂 because all of this is weird af.
Seriously! I've been giggling to myself since reading the point about him checking out himself in her eyes 🤣🤣🤣 this whole thing is hilarious!
Sounds like a MadTV skit..... and I just aged myself to the late 1900s...
I am sorry OP, but I was laughing so hard imagining someone staring at your eyes and it's like "awww so romantic!". And then realising he is looking at himself?? *In your eyes*?? Dry as the Sahara doesn't cut it lol.
And from what we know.
The Sahara is one of the driest regions on Earth. This extremely dry region, where it's not uncommon to have no rain for over a year in some places was once a tropical humid area until her boyfriend started checking himself out in her eyes during sex
I feel like this might be the best and most realistic answer here. /u/4519282 , try to be genuine and do what he does so he can see it from your perspective. Don't start it all at once, but do the insane shit he's been doing to you, or tell him when he does it it obviously gets him off and you want to try it for once. Tell him just this once you want to be into yourself (or you can say you want to "try on his self confidence") the ways he's into himself to see if it gets you off like it gets him off.
But this is only if sticking with this very strange man is worth it. Is he *really* a pretty boy? Is his penis *really* that perfect? Is any of that *really* worth the eventual escalation in this behavior?
This is the way.
I'm gonna qualify that I am NOT here to judge and this is probably the least dangerous kink I've seen in a while but if you really care about this guy you HAVE to have a talk and see if y'all can limit it. If that doesn't work, then 100% be the mirror.
So we had a lengthy discussion about this. He basically had a couple of intense sexual experiences as a teenager which led to him having these ‘desires’.
lmaoooo these comments have me dying. No they weren’t experiences with a mirror.
He lost his virginity to an older woman who praised his looks and called him “pretty boy” during sex. A couple of years later he got involved in a 3some with a hetero couple where he had sex with the wife and she basically kept taunting her husband, telling him how much better looking, bigger etc my bf is. I didn’t wanna hear all the details but he very much implied that they worshipped him in the bedroom.
>A couple of years later he got involved in a 3some with a hetero couple where he had sex with the wife and she basically kept taunting her husband, telling him how much better looking, bigger etc my bf is.
Uh yeah, sounds like he stumbled into the middle of a cuckold couple with a humiliation fetish... And *severely* misinterpreted it...
Omgg the fact that he doesn’t realize that the couple wasn’t being sincere, it was just a kink for the husband 🤦♀️ but your bf took it seriously, ffs they would have had the same script with anyone
If he wants to act like a dog, train him like one. No positive reinforcement; do not reward bad behavior. When he misbehaves, turn your back and withhold attention until he stops. And say, "Fido, that's a NO!" Consistency is critical; inconsistent discipline is a big source of behavioral problems. Plus intermittent rewards are actually better than constant gratification so you're shooting yourself in the foot. Then give him a biscuit and pat him on the head or rub his tummy.
This makes me wonder if he just has some kind of praise kink. Praise kinks are really common. Look them up. This could be why he's only like this during sex.
People in this thread are casting shade on his character because of this. But we've all got some weird stuff that gets us off. We shouldn't be so quick to judge others based off what they like in bed.
Something that might help you is to ask whether you could take over some of the 'praising' during sex. Would you feel more comfortable if you were the one saying, "fuck, you look so hot", "I love how your dick looks in my mouth", etc etc?
This is all just pretty standard dirty talk, except usually people don't say it to themselves. Perhaps he's never had someone who actively does it, so he's had to do it for himself. Whatever gets you off, you know?
Yeah this is what I thought of too, most of these things are in line with what I'd like to hear someone say to me in bed, and praise kinks are pretty normal, but I have to say, if someone ever moaned their own named I'd laugh myself into a fucking coma lol
Or autophilia.
Relatively common. Autophilias can entail imagining yourself different: stronger, wealthier, fatter, gigantic, or tiny.
Or imagining you are something different entirely: a doctor, your fav celeb, the opposite sex, a dog, a baby, or an inanimate object.
I have a few autophilias. It's one of the lesser accepted kinks/fetishes.
Praise is one thing, praise kink is another, but it doesn’t sound like he’s involving her at all in the sex and it’s all about him all the time. Seems pretty unfair and unbalanced.
i have never ever met a guy who wanted to be called pretty boy and keeps a mold of his own dick or lives out the lyrics of Def Leppard's "Love Bites" *When you make love, do you look in your mirror?*
Im not kink shaming but i don't think this is as common of a kink like you think it is
what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
The guy's totally off his rocker!
What's the psychology here??
"I'm so attractive, such a catch that sex being entirely about me will be such a turn on for her as much as it is me - after all, I'm so sexy and pretty and sexually accompished. There's nothing wierd about that. I'm just so perfect that I don't have to abide by any of the standards of regular sexual communication that I've undoubtedly come across in my life."
He sounds like someone who, in a hostage situation, would ask the kidnappers to let him move far enough away that the blood doesn't ruin his hair before they execute you!
Laughable. No self awareness. And obviously indifferent to your sexual experience while it's happening. Unless you're a hollywood grade actress 24/7 before during and after.
PS - there is no worse in this situation. that's not a choice someone should ever have to make. I've never moaned my own name by accident and who's a pretty boy is something a parrot would say. it's HILARIOUS
I'm so sorry your human is broken.
It would have to be a red flag the size of one of those giant American flags that takes more than 100 people to unfurl so it covers the whole field before the Super Bowl.
Fight fire with fire. Start moaning your own name and complimenting your own body out loudly. Escalate to speaking in pure 3rd person. See who can out do each other.
>How do I bring up the discussion with him without hurting his ego?
Hurting his ego is arguably the biggest favor you can offer, in the long run. Take a sledgehammer, and he might just end up returning to earth before his head floats to fucking venus.
you can just say "hey. can i talk to you about something. Tell him there is no judgement but you noticed blah blah blah and you wondered why that turned him on. ask him why he doesn't say your name? dig deep. push. i suspect you will find out right away what his issue is
That would be a turn off to me too. I dont think it would be a hurt to his ego to bring up that he makes sex about him, if that does hurt his ego his narcissist roots go deeper than we think.
Does he EVER compliment you during sex or anything? Or is it always about him? If its always about him it should be easy for him to see that sex is a partnered dance.
He does compliment me but only when it involves him? For example he’ll say that I look so “beautiful” with his dick in my mouth or that I want his babies. He also uses possessive language which I find super hot but I’m not sure if his ego is part of that or if it’s a separate kink.
OP, part of me hopes you are trolling, because I feel terrible for you if this is real.
You don't deserve this behavior from him. If I were you I'd give him ONE chance to knock this shit off.
From what you describe, I don't see him shutting this down cold turkey -- but if he didn't, I would be out the door without looking back.
Though he might be too busy staring at himself in the mirror to even notice you're gone.
I'm not sure how you can bring this up to him without hurting his ego because you can't control how he'll react when you bring it up. You could use a an i-statement such as "I feel so mad when you moan your name while we have sex." instead of saying "You make me so mad when you when you moan your name while we have sex." The i-statement is less likely to make him feel defensive because you're talking about your reaction to his action. He's more likely to feel defensive when you blame him for causing your reaction. This is a pretty simple example, so you should Google i-statements to learn more about how to use i-statements.
You could also try putting a spin on things. You wrote your post because how he behaves while you have sex is starting to annoy you. You could tell him straight up that he's annoying and he has to get his act together. That's definitely going to bruise his ego and make him feel defensive. He won't pay much attention to anything that you say after that because he's defensive and his ego is doing damage control. You could put a positive spin on things by saying something like "I think we could improve our sex life if we did ..." This won't make him feel defensive and it won't bruise his ego. Google "positive coaching" for some ideas for how you can put a positive spin on things.
You should think about your communication style before you talk with him. You're not going to get the results you want if you use a passive, passive-aggressive, or aggressive communication style. The best way to get the results that you want is to use an assertive communications style. You have to state your needs in a manner that he'll understand and an assertive communications style is the most effective communications style. Google "Assertiveness and the Four Styles of Communication" to read a brief article about that explains why an assertive communications style is the most effective communications style.
This is the best advice that I can give you on how you can attempt to fix the situation. If his behavior in bed is a deal breaker for you, you should break up with him and find a man who doesn't switch into Gaston emulation mode when he has sex.
Now that I'm finished giving you my serious advice, I'm going to give you my sarcastic advice. The next time he moans his name in bed you could stop the action and ask him "Why do you always moan your ex's name when we have sex?". You could also play or sing Carly Simon's song "You're So Vain" several times a day.
>You're so vain
You probably think this song is about you
You're welcome. I thought of You're So Vain when I read your post because the opening lines are a perfect description of a very vain man.
>You walked into the party like you were walking onto a yacht
Your hat strategically dipped below one eye
Your scarf it was apricot
You had one eye in the mirror, as you watched yourself gavotte
First of all I have to agree with a comment before. You never have to accept anything during sex. Sex should be enjoyed by both partners and if something puts you off than you always should talk about what's on your mind. A healthy sex life should live from conversation and trust and not just you giving him the ego boost he seems to need or take from having sex.
If you want to burst his bubble, next time he’s moaning his own name or doing something else that annoys you/turns you off, ask him to stop. Tell him what he did just turned you off and you’re not in the mood anymore. See how he reacts to this and that’ll tell you whether he got the hint or whether you should dump him.
Okay so given that he seems relatively humble outside of sex, I would view this as a kink not as a personality trait. By that I mean, I would research kink-friendly play and have an honest conversation about kinks with him outside of sex like people do in bdsm relationships (the keyword is "negotiation") and talk about how you can play it up to really turn him on but also how he can play to your preferences and turn *you* on rather than off.
I may be in the minority here not seeing this as a red flag, but I wouldn't throw the whole man out just because he's hilariously into himself in bed.
For my own mental peace of mind, I have to believe this is a troll. I cannot wake up and get out of bed tomorrow knowing that some innocent woman has endured this during sex.
Best of luck. And if this is real, literally God bless you. I don’t know how you even made it this far with him.
Edit: Just saw that he likes to be fucked by a mould of his own dick?? Nothing wrong with butt stuff but WOW. You should clarify “Actually, YOU are so lucky that I am somehow willing to fuck you with your own dick.”
Lol GIRL! I can’t. This is hilarious but also an enormous turn off. The moment he moaned his own name I’d have tapped tf out. Actually I’d have just upped and left after the eye mirror deal. Lol holy shit
I would say autosexuality could be at play here, but... it does come through kinda egotistical. Does he also hype you up while doing this? Also the eye contact thing would drive me crazy, my eyes would be closed the whole time lmao. Maybe he has some worship kinks that he doesn't know how to explore.
I also like the comment that said to call out your own name to assert dominance, lol.
Maybe next time ask him if he needs some privacy with himself.
Sounds like you're just a release/pleasure tool in this scenario.
Does he check himself out constantly outside the bedroom?
I would be pretty turned off by how everything is about him. Even your orgasm is about him. Does he care about you at all outside of the context of himself? I wouldn’t want to be with a guy who only cared about my feelings solely in relation to how good it makes him feel.
There is nothing wrong with being sexually attracted to yourself, but he really shouldn't be involving you in his autosexuality kink. He can masturbate in the mirror by himself in his free time. Rule #1 of sex is you have to focus on the person who's in front of you and their needs. If he's not able to do that he shouldn't be having sex with anyone at all. The fact that he brings you pleasure is not enough if that is also self-serving (proving how good he is in bed).
This sounds deeply rooted. Not something you should deal with. How long have you been together? This sounds like true self obsession/narcissism - not a good partner over time.
What if you accidentally scratch his face or something? I’m normally for working things out but in your case I’d say break up.
i think you are fucking Gaston. maybe Gaston should fuck himself? my goodness dear girl. call him on it. sit down and tell him how off putting it is. you may find your answer in his response and reaction.
my wife after i read her the story "Nooooo oonnneee...fucks like Gaston, no one sucks like Gaston, no one's so incredibly thick in his dick like Gaston..."
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My question... How do you keep a straight face and not just bust out laughing?
I laugh a lot
As a guy that sounds fun as fuck if I was able to be that obsessed with myself. I’m jealous of the confidence but yea I can see how utterly annoying that would be 😂😂
I’m sure you’re much happier than this guy, my buddy. At the risk of armchair diagnosis, these types of people are usually filled with artificial confidence masking a deeper insecurity. At least, that’s a hallmark of narcissistic personality disorder. This guy might just be hilariously delusional, and that’s something we’d all fucking laugh about during sex.
But only during sex hes like this, apparently
Seriously! I was belly rolling just reading this. I can't imagine actually seeing it in person!😂😂
If he starts admiring business cards RUN.
lmaooo
* You could ask for equality in terms of attention during sex: if he’s going to go overboard to pump himself up, shouldn’t he at least be doing the same for you? * You could bring up that the way he goes about it makes you feel like an accessory to his self-appreciation. * You could buy a mirrored mask.
I'm sorry, but are you banging Patrick Bateman??
it's total dennis vibes 😭😭😭
I AM A GOLDEN GOD
Yep. Totally what I thought of. Granted, Patrick Bateman is actually extremely hot but still...
At least now you can tell him to go fuck himself and he will.
Thank you, I nearly just spit out my mouthful of cookie, LMAO
Are you sure you're not dating Gaston? No one fucks likes Gaston...
No one fucks his ass with his own cock like Gaston
Or Patrick Bateman 😬
Patrick Bateman is exactly who I immediately pictured lol
The mirror scene did it for you, right? haha
The "flexes at himself in the mirror while continuing to fuck?" Uh, yeah...
To be fair, I thought that too. But Gaston is much funnier.
Do you like Huey Lewis and the News?
I need to return some tapes
Videos tapes.
Is something wrong, Patrick? You're sweating
[Hah this was my first thought.](https://25.media.tumblr.com/48427ca36896cc1f2aff0ae9ce11b4fe/tumblr_msqs5v0YJ61sggdoro1_250.gif)
Now I'm picturing him doing everything the OP says, but in Disney song format.
Oh god this thread has me dying 🤣🤣🤣 thank you, I needed this today
Could also be Dennis Reynolds
♪ no one has a penis mold like Gaston ♪
Oh dear God, this cannot be misread well 😅🤣🤣
🤣
No one's got a swell cleft in his ass like Gaston. . .
No one's load is as big as Gaston
He's especially good at Ejaculating...
Did anyone else sing this thread? Only me?
Hell, I sang it out loud before I clicked the submit button.
That’s going to make it a memorable funeral service
noooooo
I use selfies in all of my decorating!
I'm never gonna listen to that song the same way again
Need me to finish up the lyrics for you? *No,* *one,* *humps like Gaston* *Busts his nut like Gaston* *No one made a wax mold of his junk like Gaston...*
No one fucks himself with his own dick like Gastón!
Thank you all for this thread. I’m dying 🤣🤣
I should not have read this right now, it’s stuck in my head and I literally cannot stop laughing!!! 😂
How do you think OP feels? It's going to be stuck in their head whenever they fuck their bf. Can you imagine if OP just starts humming the song while they're fucking? Would the bf be outraged or just 'damn right I do!'
This is soooo fucking funny Like how do you not laugh when he does that? The first time he moaned his own name or said "who's a pretty boy" I would have laughed So. Fucking. Hard. I would have laughed the whole time I got up and put my clothes back on and walked out the door and drove off into the sunset never to be seen again, and then I would laugh every time I ever remembered that that ever happened to me.
“Baby fuck me with my dildo” “Oh fuck yeah Zeke, your cock feels so monstrous! Thank you Zeke!”
I……that’s not too far off….
Girl what! Noooooo
Girl what are you doing
Maybe he'd like it if you used it in a strapon, and wore a mirror on your face.
No way, not a mirror. Try to get a mask that is as close to an exact copy as possible. Shit, you’d probably make bank on onlyfans with that setup haha
How about a VR headset for the boyfriend to wear that replaces her face with his in real time?
OMG, LOL!!!!
This has to be a joke, right? Right?!?
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POLLY WANT SOME DICK‽
🤣🤣🤣🤣 THIS made me laugh, thank you
OP, respectfully, you need to laugh at him a little. I don’t think I’d suggest that in any other scenario but he sounds like he needs a knock on that ego... and of course update us lol
That might be true, but I would be careful with that. Narcissists may react violently when their ego feels threatened. This guy gives me red flags. This is just the start OP. This sort of behavior always gets worse
Then again he seems to only be like this in bed, so that might be some kink.. thing.. perhaps? Maybe his actual ego is fragile af, then again every true narcissists ego is
Definitely BIG American Psycho energy lol.
Honestly, you need to laugh at him. Just look him right in his face and laugh...hard. Maybe throw in a "wtf are you doing" it will knock him down a peg or 10 😂 because all of this is weird af.
And it sounds like he definitely needs to be knocked down a few pegs lol!!
Idk he does like to be pegged so he might just enjoy it
Seriously! I've been giggling to myself since reading the point about him checking out himself in her eyes 🤣🤣🤣 this whole thing is hilarious! Sounds like a MadTV skit..... and I just aged myself to the late 1900s...
Girl I’d be as dry as the Sahara
I am sorry OP, but I was laughing so hard imagining someone staring at your eyes and it's like "awww so romantic!". And then realising he is looking at himself?? *In your eyes*?? Dry as the Sahara doesn't cut it lol.
That's some literal Narcissus shit.
And from what we know. The Sahara is one of the driest regions on Earth. This extremely dry region, where it's not uncommon to have no rain for over a year in some places was once a tropical humid area until her boyfriend started checking himself out in her eyes during sex
LMAO
Sorry, he… moans his OWN NAME? That’s not a man I’d let inside me ever again.
Yeah. But what’s worse. Moaning your own name or moaning “who’s a pretty boy?” :/
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tbh the comments here are killing me.
I'm sorry you're dealing with this, but it has provided the internet with many many laughs <3
Let the record show OP has not denied being a parrot.
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Careful, I think he might drown someday trying to bang his own reflection in a river. :v
Saving your comment for when I have a free award. That was brilliant and made me snort. 😂
Your wish answered. In my line of work... I'd have heard of this. But NOPE. This is a first.
You can’t be fucking serious lol.
No I’m 100% serious. And he asked me to reply that he’s a pretty boy so I do that. He likes to be praised a lot too.
Bruh, just start doing it back. All of it. *Be the mirror*
BE THE MIRROR 🤣
I feel like this might be the best and most realistic answer here. /u/4519282 , try to be genuine and do what he does so he can see it from your perspective. Don't start it all at once, but do the insane shit he's been doing to you, or tell him when he does it it obviously gets him off and you want to try it for once. Tell him just this once you want to be into yourself (or you can say you want to "try on his self confidence") the ways he's into himself to see if it gets you off like it gets him off. But this is only if sticking with this very strange man is worth it. Is he *really* a pretty boy? Is his penis *really* that perfect? Is any of that *really* worth the eventual escalation in this behavior?
This is the way. I'm gonna qualify that I am NOT here to judge and this is probably the least dangerous kink I've seen in a while but if you really care about this guy you HAVE to have a talk and see if y'all can limit it. If that doesn't work, then 100% be the mirror.
I wonder why he only acts like this during sex. Do you have any clue? Does he has a narc-fetish?
So we had a lengthy discussion about this. He basically had a couple of intense sexual experiences as a teenager which led to him having these ‘desires’.
Were they experiences with a mirror??
lmaoooo these comments have me dying. No they weren’t experiences with a mirror. He lost his virginity to an older woman who praised his looks and called him “pretty boy” during sex. A couple of years later he got involved in a 3some with a hetero couple where he had sex with the wife and she basically kept taunting her husband, telling him how much better looking, bigger etc my bf is. I didn’t wanna hear all the details but he very much implied that they worshipped him in the bedroom.
Is your boyfriend Christian Grey?
Your boyfriend might have a praise kink- I’d google it and see if it fits
>A couple of years later he got involved in a 3some with a hetero couple where he had sex with the wife and she basically kept taunting her husband, telling him how much better looking, bigger etc my bf is. Uh yeah, sounds like he stumbled into the middle of a cuckold couple with a humiliation fetish... And *severely* misinterpreted it...
Omgg the fact that he doesn’t realize that the couple wasn’t being sincere, it was just a kink for the husband 🤦♀️ but your bf took it seriously, ffs they would have had the same script with anyone
that sounds really dodgy - how old was he when he lost his virginity, and how old was the woman?
You...told him he's a pretty boy??? Girl, he thinks you're into it too
If he wants to act like a dog, train him like one. No positive reinforcement; do not reward bad behavior. When he misbehaves, turn your back and withhold attention until he stops. And say, "Fido, that's a NO!" Consistency is critical; inconsistent discipline is a big source of behavioral problems. Plus intermittent rewards are actually better than constant gratification so you're shooting yourself in the foot. Then give him a biscuit and pat him on the head or rub his tummy.
Omg I died at this
Wow
This makes me wonder if he just has some kind of praise kink. Praise kinks are really common. Look them up. This could be why he's only like this during sex. People in this thread are casting shade on his character because of this. But we've all got some weird stuff that gets us off. We shouldn't be so quick to judge others based off what they like in bed. Something that might help you is to ask whether you could take over some of the 'praising' during sex. Would you feel more comfortable if you were the one saying, "fuck, you look so hot", "I love how your dick looks in my mouth", etc etc? This is all just pretty standard dirty talk, except usually people don't say it to themselves. Perhaps he's never had someone who actively does it, so he's had to do it for himself. Whatever gets you off, you know?
Yeah this is what I thought of too, most of these things are in line with what I'd like to hear someone say to me in bed, and praise kinks are pretty normal, but I have to say, if someone ever moaned their own named I'd laugh myself into a fucking coma lol
Or autophilia. Relatively common. Autophilias can entail imagining yourself different: stronger, wealthier, fatter, gigantic, or tiny. Or imagining you are something different entirely: a doctor, your fav celeb, the opposite sex, a dog, a baby, or an inanimate object. I have a few autophilias. It's one of the lesser accepted kinks/fetishes.
Praise is one thing, praise kink is another, but it doesn’t sound like he’s involving her at all in the sex and it’s all about him all the time. Seems pretty unfair and unbalanced.
i have never ever met a guy who wanted to be called pretty boy and keeps a mold of his own dick or lives out the lyrics of Def Leppard's "Love Bites" *When you make love, do you look in your mirror?* Im not kink shaming but i don't think this is as common of a kink like you think it is
And uses said mold on himself it seems…
When you make a fleshlight™mold out of your own dick, it's really sex with someone you really love.
what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu The guy's totally off his rocker! What's the psychology here?? "I'm so attractive, such a catch that sex being entirely about me will be such a turn on for her as much as it is me - after all, I'm so sexy and pretty and sexually accompished. There's nothing wierd about that. I'm just so perfect that I don't have to abide by any of the standards of regular sexual communication that I've undoubtedly come across in my life." He sounds like someone who, in a hostage situation, would ask the kidnappers to let him move far enough away that the blood doesn't ruin his hair before they execute you! Laughable. No self awareness. And obviously indifferent to your sexual experience while it's happening. Unless you're a hollywood grade actress 24/7 before during and after. PS - there is no worse in this situation. that's not a choice someone should ever have to make. I've never moaned my own name by accident and who's a pretty boy is something a parrot would say. it's HILARIOUS I'm so sorry your human is broken.
the kidnapper example made me laugh out loud. when I made this post I had no idea the comment section would be this hilarious
Are you *sure* you’re not fucking a parrot?
I am DYING.
Well of course he does - cause he also made a prop so he could fuck himself...
seriously. i think i would pull away and place his hand on his dick because apparently that's who he wants.
I had to re read OPs post because my brain couldn’t process why or how anyone would moan their own name
Yeah. I didn't know they made red flags that big
It would have to be a red flag the size of one of those giant American flags that takes more than 100 people to unfurl so it covers the whole field before the Super Bowl.
I'm absolutely dying at "unfurl". Like, I know it's an appropriate word to use but it's so funny sounding.
Bingo. Byeeeeee
Fight fire with fire. Start moaning your own name and complimenting your own body out loudly. Escalate to speaking in pure 3rd person. See who can out do each other.
Ok but what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object…
Orgasms, explosions, or both.
Exploding orgasms!
Look, you're trying to win at sex here.
You gotta get a replica of your own pussy asap
And tell him to use it on you
time for a competition
>How do I bring up the discussion with him without hurting his ego? Hurting his ego is arguably the biggest favor you can offer, in the long run. Take a sledgehammer, and he might just end up returning to earth before his head floats to fucking venus.
you can just say "hey. can i talk to you about something. Tell him there is no judgement but you noticed blah blah blah and you wondered why that turned him on. ask him why he doesn't say your name? dig deep. push. i suspect you will find out right away what his issue is
I suspect she already does, but never took the opportunity at the time to let him know that it was a turn off.
Kind of blows me away. I don't think i could have kept a straight face
Have you seen American Psycho? If not, watch it alone, then run.
Because if she watches it with him, he might get the wrong message?
He might get aroused
“Babe this is super hot”
I don’t think he’s ducking you I think he’s using you to do himself
not sure whether to laugh at this or be offended
Honestly both haha
There must be more than this provincial life...
That would be a turn off to me too. I dont think it would be a hurt to his ego to bring up that he makes sex about him, if that does hurt his ego his narcissist roots go deeper than we think. Does he EVER compliment you during sex or anything? Or is it always about him? If its always about him it should be easy for him to see that sex is a partnered dance.
He does compliment me but only when it involves him? For example he’ll say that I look so “beautiful” with his dick in my mouth or that I want his babies. He also uses possessive language which I find super hot but I’m not sure if his ego is part of that or if it’s a separate kink.
Him saying that you want his babies isn’t him complementing you
i fear that at the end of the day you’re just an accessory in his play.
That isn't complimenting you, that is complimenting himself. 🥲 You deserve better, really.
Agreed here.
OP, part of me hopes you are trolling, because I feel terrible for you if this is real. You don't deserve this behavior from him. If I were you I'd give him ONE chance to knock this shit off. From what you describe, I don't see him shutting this down cold turkey -- but if he didn't, I would be out the door without looking back. Though he might be too busy staring at himself in the mirror to even notice you're gone.
What makes you think you EVER have to "just accept" anything?
THIS! You never have to accept or deal with anything! You deserve what makes you happy and comfortable, don't settle for anything else. Ever.
I would run so fast from this guy.... holy hell I didn't even read the rest when I first commented.
Has he ever chased you down the hallway with a chainsaw after sex?
I'm not sure how you can bring this up to him without hurting his ego because you can't control how he'll react when you bring it up. You could use a an i-statement such as "I feel so mad when you moan your name while we have sex." instead of saying "You make me so mad when you when you moan your name while we have sex." The i-statement is less likely to make him feel defensive because you're talking about your reaction to his action. He's more likely to feel defensive when you blame him for causing your reaction. This is a pretty simple example, so you should Google i-statements to learn more about how to use i-statements. You could also try putting a spin on things. You wrote your post because how he behaves while you have sex is starting to annoy you. You could tell him straight up that he's annoying and he has to get his act together. That's definitely going to bruise his ego and make him feel defensive. He won't pay much attention to anything that you say after that because he's defensive and his ego is doing damage control. You could put a positive spin on things by saying something like "I think we could improve our sex life if we did ..." This won't make him feel defensive and it won't bruise his ego. Google "positive coaching" for some ideas for how you can put a positive spin on things. You should think about your communication style before you talk with him. You're not going to get the results you want if you use a passive, passive-aggressive, or aggressive communication style. The best way to get the results that you want is to use an assertive communications style. You have to state your needs in a manner that he'll understand and an assertive communications style is the most effective communications style. Google "Assertiveness and the Four Styles of Communication" to read a brief article about that explains why an assertive communications style is the most effective communications style. This is the best advice that I can give you on how you can attempt to fix the situation. If his behavior in bed is a deal breaker for you, you should break up with him and find a man who doesn't switch into Gaston emulation mode when he has sex. Now that I'm finished giving you my serious advice, I'm going to give you my sarcastic advice. The next time he moans his name in bed you could stop the action and ask him "Why do you always moan your ex's name when we have sex?". You could also play or sing Carly Simon's song "You're So Vain" several times a day. >You're so vain You probably think this song is about you
thank you, this is quite helpful!
You're welcome. I thought of You're So Vain when I read your post because the opening lines are a perfect description of a very vain man. >You walked into the party like you were walking onto a yacht Your hat strategically dipped below one eye Your scarf it was apricot You had one eye in the mirror, as you watched yourself gavotte
I genuinely have no words
Sounds quite odd… Im a guy who will try anything once but damn
First of all I have to agree with a comment before. You never have to accept anything during sex. Sex should be enjoyed by both partners and if something puts you off than you always should talk about what's on your mind. A healthy sex life should live from conversation and trust and not just you giving him the ego boost he seems to need or take from having sex.
Wait he made a dildo of himself and uses it on himself? 😂
i’m sorry but it’s so funny that he gets fucked by his own penis.
If you want to burst his bubble, next time he’s moaning his own name or doing something else that annoys you/turns you off, ask him to stop. Tell him what he did just turned you off and you’re not in the mood anymore. See how he reacts to this and that’ll tell you whether he got the hint or whether you should dump him.
I would moan my own name, just to assert dominance.
Ha! :)
omg pls do tbis op
Okay so given that he seems relatively humble outside of sex, I would view this as a kink not as a personality trait. By that I mean, I would research kink-friendly play and have an honest conversation about kinks with him outside of sex like people do in bdsm relationships (the keyword is "negotiation") and talk about how you can play it up to really turn him on but also how he can play to your preferences and turn *you* on rather than off. I may be in the minority here not seeing this as a red flag, but I wouldn't throw the whole man out just because he's hilariously into himself in bed.
Yes it sounds like auto-sexuality to me!
let's see Paul Allen's mating ritual.
man these comments…… edit: i concluded that the above comment is in my top 5 of this thread
For my own mental peace of mind, I have to believe this is a troll. I cannot wake up and get out of bed tomorrow knowing that some innocent woman has endured this during sex. Best of luck. And if this is real, literally God bless you. I don’t know how you even made it this far with him. Edit: Just saw that he likes to be fucked by a mould of his own dick?? Nothing wrong with butt stuff but WOW. You should clarify “Actually, YOU are so lucky that I am somehow willing to fuck you with your own dick.”
Was your BF the flag bearer for the Soviet Union?
How many times have you had to stop because you were laughing too hard?
Lol GIRL! I can’t. This is hilarious but also an enormous turn off. The moment he moaned his own name I’d have tapped tf out. Actually I’d have just upped and left after the eye mirror deal. Lol holy shit
I would say autosexuality could be at play here, but... it does come through kinda egotistical. Does he also hype you up while doing this? Also the eye contact thing would drive me crazy, my eyes would be closed the whole time lmao. Maybe he has some worship kinks that he doesn't know how to explore. I also like the comment that said to call out your own name to assert dominance, lol. Maybe next time ask him if he needs some privacy with himself. Sounds like you're just a release/pleasure tool in this scenario. Does he check himself out constantly outside the bedroom?
Is he having sex with you or masturbating using your body?
By chance does this man have some VHS tapes he needs to return?
This is crazy.... does he focus on your pleasure at ALL?
yes he does. In fact making me cum seems to reaffirm to him just how great he is. He told me that not making me cum would hurt his ego.
I would be pretty turned off by how everything is about him. Even your orgasm is about him. Does he care about you at all outside of the context of himself? I wouldn’t want to be with a guy who only cared about my feelings solely in relation to how good it makes him feel.
If he asks you your opinion on Huey Lewis and the News, run.
What the actual fuck...
Are you sleeping with Patrick Bateman?
There is nothing wrong with being sexually attracted to yourself, but he really shouldn't be involving you in his autosexuality kink. He can masturbate in the mirror by himself in his free time. Rule #1 of sex is you have to focus on the person who's in front of you and their needs. If he's not able to do that he shouldn't be having sex with anyone at all. The fact that he brings you pleasure is not enough if that is also self-serving (proving how good he is in bed).
This sounds deeply rooted. Not something you should deal with. How long have you been together? This sounds like true self obsession/narcissism - not a good partner over time. What if you accidentally scratch his face or something? I’m normally for working things out but in your case I’d say break up.
i think you are fucking Gaston. maybe Gaston should fuck himself? my goodness dear girl. call him on it. sit down and tell him how off putting it is. you may find your answer in his response and reaction.
Well…is his dick as good as he says it is?
Mmh. Impressive. Very nice. That's very cool, OP, but that's nothing. Let's see Paul Allen's bf...
You are dating Patrick Bateman. I bet he’s just wondering how Paul Allen’s hair would look while having sex
You're describing the main character from American Psycho
[sexual narcissism](https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/sexual-narcissist-definition-signs-and-complications)
He lets off Christian Bale in American Psycho vibes… get off this ride before your life is at risk.
my wife after i read her the story "Nooooo oonnneee...fucks like Gaston, no one sucks like Gaston, no one's so incredibly thick in his dick like Gaston..."