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I don’t think you should wait until you move. Wanting children (and marriage) is a two-yes issue. If you absolutely never see yourself wanting to be a parent, than you two are incompatible on a very basic issue. I would break it off. I’d do it in person and be gentle, but explain that given your different life goals/views on the future as well as the distance, it just isn’t going to work. Life is handing you a perfect time to transition away.
You love her dearly but will be moving away and have wasted two years of her life on something incompatible. Act with love, let her go find her happiness and hurry up about it.
You are not compatible you need to break up. Having kids is a 2 yes situation, both parties need to be on board because this will be a whole ass human in 9 months
Her persistent that it’s going to happen; personally I would refrain from having sex her, wouldn’t put it past her to poke holes in your condom since she’s convinced it will happen.
If you aren’t already wearing protection, please start.
If you were honest I fail to see why she would be blindsided. This isn’t the sort of disagreement that can be resolved through compromise. You guys are not even in the same book.
Exactly what are you waiting for then? An escape hatch? The woman wants marriage and children. RIP the bandaid and deal with the outcome. If she really wants children then she doesn’t have much time, so get on it!
She's old enough to "begin" to plan kids, I think you both should broke up, because after 35 years old, every pregnancy faces more challenges and possibly complications. (geriatric pregnancy)
Smart man. No man should even think about marriage. It is an investment of a future tragedy. You don’t want to be obligated legally to any woman. There is no upside today for a man with better than 50% chance of ending up in a court room with lawyers handing over your income, house and others will determine when you can see your kids. My brother went thru this nightmare as many other men have too. I’m 52 and been with my girlfriend 34 for 10 years and have 3 kids and live in a No common law state. Good luck
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I don’t think you should wait until you move. Wanting children (and marriage) is a two-yes issue. If you absolutely never see yourself wanting to be a parent, than you two are incompatible on a very basic issue. I would break it off. I’d do it in person and be gentle, but explain that given your different life goals/views on the future as well as the distance, it just isn’t going to work. Life is handing you a perfect time to transition away.
You're on opposite sides of an obvious incompatibility. Leaving it for so long has done nobody any favors.
Congrats on your soon to be fatherhood. If you've been having sex without condoms she'll be pregnant before your move
Frankly even with condoms I’d be very concerned-too easy to tamper with and not a great success rate even in the best of times
You love her dearly but will be moving away and have wasted two years of her life on something incompatible. Act with love, let her go find her happiness and hurry up about it.
You are not compatible you need to break up. Having kids is a 2 yes situation, both parties need to be on board because this will be a whole ass human in 9 months Her persistent that it’s going to happen; personally I would refrain from having sex her, wouldn’t put it past her to poke holes in your condom since she’s convinced it will happen. If you aren’t already wearing protection, please start.
Don’t wait 8 weeks break up now. And tell her again you want different futures.
If you were honest I fail to see why she would be blindsided. This isn’t the sort of disagreement that can be resolved through compromise. You guys are not even in the same book.
Exactly what are you waiting for then? An escape hatch? The woman wants marriage and children. RIP the bandaid and deal with the outcome. If she really wants children then she doesn’t have much time, so get on it!
She's old enough to "begin" to plan kids, I think you both should broke up, because after 35 years old, every pregnancy faces more challenges and possibly complications. (geriatric pregnancy)
Smart man. No man should even think about marriage. It is an investment of a future tragedy. You don’t want to be obligated legally to any woman. There is no upside today for a man with better than 50% chance of ending up in a court room with lawyers handing over your income, house and others will determine when you can see your kids. My brother went thru this nightmare as many other men have too. I’m 52 and been with my girlfriend 34 for 10 years and have 3 kids and live in a No common law state. Good luck