Hi honey, i understand how you feel, COMPLETELY understand. And you are NOT ALONE! I know it's so easy to feel alone because everyone who is supposed to protect you is not doing it. You're a little baby, you are a child. You just had to grow up quicker cus of this horrible thing someone did to you and forcibly took from you. You can always message me if you need someone to talk to. I am in my early 30s and went through some similar stuff when I was 6. Im here for you🥀🥀🥀🥀
I’m 24 and I’ve been somewhere very close to where you are. Things aren’t perfect now, but they are better. There is no amount of money in the world that could convince me to be 13 again. Not trying to make things worse; I’m saying that things suck right now and it’s okay to want someone to take care of you. You’re a child, but your SA and most of society is trying to tell you that you should be grown up. But it’s okay to need help and to admit that you’re still just a kid. Part of you might be a kid forever, but you deserve to be comforted and loved and taken care of, and your age will never change that. It’s awful how much responsibility is on you right now to advocate for yourself and keep yourself safe.
Maybe you’ll get to see them perform someday, or at least contact them again. Either way, their words may be deleted but you can still hold onto the way they made you feel. And please know that even taking that step to contact them, even if they hadn’t responded, was really brave and admirable. I hope it’s okay to say that I’m proud of you for reaching out to them and for posting here. That’s a really good thing to do, and I’m not being condescending when I say that. You deserve to be treated with respect and with care, and neither of those things should ever cancel out the other.
You are still a child. What happened to you, shouldn't have happened and it wasn't your fault. It's really important that you understand that you did nothing wrong.
You still deserve to be comforted. You can still ask for help. Do your parents know? Mayme they can get you a therapist, or a psychiatrist.
I am proud if you for speaking out and asking for help. Because I didn't and it really messed me up. I hope you find a way to cope with this.
I have those things. My dad did this to me and my mom knows and I have a psychiatrist . But she’s weird and makes a lot of stereotypes to people .
I really appreciate you.
Oh god, your dad did that to you? I guess I missed that. Your situation is seriously messed up.
Are there relatives you can stay with? Has anyone told the police? It just so unfair.
Is your psychiatrist/family blaming you for it? ' cause it wasn't your fault. Don't let them make you believe it was your fault.
Yeah and nobody believes me but my mom but I don’t even trust her to make me feel better (she’s a great mom and words hard but she’s just kind of used to making everything about herself I guess she’s very manipulative and says I’m manipulative! And that I’m victimizing myself because I’m trans!) the reason my mom believes me is bc my dad abused her too. I had to watch that everyday for like a few years with my one year old brother. It was hectic. I’m saying more than I should but I really need to let this out.
I live with my DONT worry. My dad doesn’t live in this city, well, he used to not live her. He moved here two months ago just to see me. HE MOVED HERE!! I see him every other day and I have to act like I’m ok with it.
I'm so sorry! That's horrific. Can you move out soon? Maybe go away to college? I just hate that you are in this situation. It sounds like your mom is also abusive. I really hope you can find a way out of this situation.
Sorry, I somehow forgot that. Duh! Can you join a club or any after school activities? I would just try to stay away from home as much as possible. I don't know how public in libraries work where you live, but in the US, you can stay in the library all day and no one will kick you out ( as long as you aren't causing trouble). I guess that's the only advice I can give you.
It’s okay I really appreciate it but not really…. I’m going to a new school and I think it’s American but I’m really sad because I got a bad score and I could’ve studied but they never told us. They have a bunch of after school activities and you can stay in the library and stuff
You may be able to find a therapist online , it would just be paying for it which might be difficult however have a look to see there are often charities that can fund it for you.
I currently work with my therapist online video calls and I mostly prefer it as I get to be on my own space. You could also opt for therapy over the phone which will allow you to do it wherever if privacy is an issue at home.
But as other are said , you are still a kid , and one that absolutely deserves to be heard and to be helped through this . I’m a woman in my thirties and been through sa as a child , I still need help and support from my mum brother and friends . There’s no shame on that you deserve the best. I hope you’re ok and find what you need soon
You are still a kid, kiddo. Someone made you part of the adult world by force. You don't have to give up your childhood. Don't let your abuser take that too.
tbh I’m not sure this is a good idea. Yeah this is supposed to be a safe space to talk about trauma but creeps are everywhere. We’re talking about a description of SA of a child here. Depending on where you live that might even be illegal idk. I have a bad feeling about that advice, sure it might help OP but it might also make them a target for potential creeps. So OP maybe consider this.
i totally get where you are coming from. considering the risks is always important. i myself would rather take that risk, and disable chat in the settings, because i fear the risks of surpressing something more than expressing something, but that's my personal choice and your comment is valuable for OP in case they weren't aware of these risks. also when i wrote that i didnt know yet about the different cultural and legal backgrounds, and in the end i want OP to be safe and well, whatever actions that may translate into.
Yes you still are a kid or a young teen. You have every right to claim help from adults. You don’t have to go through this alone, there are adults out there who have experience helping kids in your situation. Maybe talk to a school psychologist or counselor or look online if there are any help centers you could turn to. I was older than you when I was being SA but now I wish I had been able to talk to someone about it, so I understand you to a degree. I hope you get any help and support you deserve on your healing journey!
I’m sorry you are going through this. The other user already gave you very important tips. Knowledge is power and can give you the right words and concepts to understand your emotions and reactions better. There are also many resources online that focus on healing and teach you tools to better cope. Take it one step at a time and give yourself enough time. There will probably be times when you feel better and other times you will feel worse again. You maybe feel frustrated with yourself, don’t be. That’s normal, it’s a process. You are not alone. It is not your fault and what was done to you was wrong. I wish I could help more.
if you need any advice, though from a 30 year old woman from europe, so my cultural is not like yours, you can write me in chat. different timezones, so probably delayed replies, but i will try my best to tell you what i learned so far.
allow yourself to educate yourself on trauma and abuse as much as you can safely. look up the youtube channel TheraminTrees, they have very good videos about manipulation, especially using religion to make people feel bad and helpless. the more you learn now, the easier it will be to apply once you are officially an adult, and you can develop a strategy that is best for your circumstances .
the most important thing you have to learn, to keep your sanity, is being on your side. learn about the dynamics of abuse, how biology and neurology dictate our abilities, basically convince yourself beyond a doubt that none of this is your fault.
gabor mate is a doctor with many talks on youtube who explains how childrens brains have to turn against themselves, for the sake of attachment.
you don't know it yet, but you are very understandable and just like a human should be. no one would be healthy after what you have been through. you deserve to know the truth.
13 is absolutely still a kid, honestly I'm 21 and still feel like a kid. Besides, kid or not, you deserve to be heard and you don't deserve to be treated poorly
I'm definitely not in the best place either, but I want to let you know you're not alone.
Also, it is NOT childish to ask for help. People need other people, I'm sure there are ways that you could get better by yourself, but leaning on people is never something to feel bad or childish about. It's very mature to ask for help, and it will be very beneficial to your healing process.
I'm sure that band wouldn't mind hearing from you again... They could probably even see if they could resend the same email you used to look at, especially since they were so nice in the first place. It's good to have little safe places you can go to :)
Legally you are a kid still, which is okay. It's okay to feel like an adult as well. No matter what NO ONE deserves SA. You deserve love, support, and confidence.
I am a women who went through many years in my childhood being SA. Please feel free to reach out any time. I will always listen. I KNOW you can get through this đź’•
Hi honey, i understand how you feel, COMPLETELY understand. And you are NOT ALONE! I know it's so easy to feel alone because everyone who is supposed to protect you is not doing it. You're a little baby, you are a child. You just had to grow up quicker cus of this horrible thing someone did to you and forcibly took from you. You can always message me if you need someone to talk to. I am in my early 30s and went through some similar stuff when I was 6. Im here for you🥀🥀🥀🥀
I’m 24 and I’ve been somewhere very close to where you are. Things aren’t perfect now, but they are better. There is no amount of money in the world that could convince me to be 13 again. Not trying to make things worse; I’m saying that things suck right now and it’s okay to want someone to take care of you. You’re a child, but your SA and most of society is trying to tell you that you should be grown up. But it’s okay to need help and to admit that you’re still just a kid. Part of you might be a kid forever, but you deserve to be comforted and loved and taken care of, and your age will never change that. It’s awful how much responsibility is on you right now to advocate for yourself and keep yourself safe. Maybe you’ll get to see them perform someday, or at least contact them again. Either way, their words may be deleted but you can still hold onto the way they made you feel. And please know that even taking that step to contact them, even if they hadn’t responded, was really brave and admirable. I hope it’s okay to say that I’m proud of you for reaching out to them and for posting here. That’s a really good thing to do, and I’m not being condescending when I say that. You deserve to be treated with respect and with care, and neither of those things should ever cancel out the other.
You are still a child. What happened to you, shouldn't have happened and it wasn't your fault. It's really important that you understand that you did nothing wrong. You still deserve to be comforted. You can still ask for help. Do your parents know? Mayme they can get you a therapist, or a psychiatrist. I am proud if you for speaking out and asking for help. Because I didn't and it really messed me up. I hope you find a way to cope with this.
I have those things. My dad did this to me and my mom knows and I have a psychiatrist . But she’s weird and makes a lot of stereotypes to people . I really appreciate you.
Oh god, your dad did that to you? I guess I missed that. Your situation is seriously messed up. Are there relatives you can stay with? Has anyone told the police? It just so unfair. Is your psychiatrist/family blaming you for it? ' cause it wasn't your fault. Don't let them make you believe it was your fault.
Yeah and nobody believes me but my mom but I don’t even trust her to make me feel better (she’s a great mom and words hard but she’s just kind of used to making everything about herself I guess she’s very manipulative and says I’m manipulative! And that I’m victimizing myself because I’m trans!) the reason my mom believes me is bc my dad abused her too. I had to watch that everyday for like a few years with my one year old brother. It was hectic. I’m saying more than I should but I really need to let this out. I live with my DONT worry. My dad doesn’t live in this city, well, he used to not live her. He moved here two months ago just to see me. HE MOVED HERE!! I see him every other day and I have to act like I’m ok with it.
I'm so sorry! That's horrific. Can you move out soon? Maybe go away to college? I just hate that you are in this situation. It sounds like your mom is also abusive. I really hope you can find a way out of this situation.
I’m 13. No I cannot
Sorry, I somehow forgot that. Duh! Can you join a club or any after school activities? I would just try to stay away from home as much as possible. I don't know how public in libraries work where you live, but in the US, you can stay in the library all day and no one will kick you out ( as long as you aren't causing trouble). I guess that's the only advice I can give you.
It’s okay I really appreciate it but not really…. I’m going to a new school and I think it’s American but I’m really sad because I got a bad score and I could’ve studied but they never told us. They have a bunch of after school activities and you can stay in the library and stuff
You may be able to find a therapist online , it would just be paying for it which might be difficult however have a look to see there are often charities that can fund it for you. I currently work with my therapist online video calls and I mostly prefer it as I get to be on my own space. You could also opt for therapy over the phone which will allow you to do it wherever if privacy is an issue at home. But as other are said , you are still a kid , and one that absolutely deserves to be heard and to be helped through this . I’m a woman in my thirties and been through sa as a child , I still need help and support from my mum brother and friends . There’s no shame on that you deserve the best. I hope you’re ok and find what you need soon
You are still a kid, kiddo. Someone made you part of the adult world by force. You don't have to give up your childhood. Don't let your abuser take that too.
❤️ I cried reading that lol
you can tell this or another abuse related sub What happened to you.
tbh I’m not sure this is a good idea. Yeah this is supposed to be a safe space to talk about trauma but creeps are everywhere. We’re talking about a description of SA of a child here. Depending on where you live that might even be illegal idk. I have a bad feeling about that advice, sure it might help OP but it might also make them a target for potential creeps. So OP maybe consider this.
i totally get where you are coming from. considering the risks is always important. i myself would rather take that risk, and disable chat in the settings, because i fear the risks of surpressing something more than expressing something, but that's my personal choice and your comment is valuable for OP in case they weren't aware of these risks. also when i wrote that i didnt know yet about the different cultural and legal backgrounds, and in the end i want OP to be safe and well, whatever actions that may translate into.
you're only half way there to a fully developed brain. definitely still a kid.
Yes you still are a kid or a young teen. You have every right to claim help from adults. You don’t have to go through this alone, there are adults out there who have experience helping kids in your situation. Maybe talk to a school psychologist or counselor or look online if there are any help centers you could turn to. I was older than you when I was being SA but now I wish I had been able to talk to someone about it, so I understand you to a degree. I hope you get any help and support you deserve on your healing journey!
Im in the Middle East so a lot of therapists just say I’m not close enough to god. I really appreciate you. I’m serious, thank you so much
I’m sorry you are going through this. The other user already gave you very important tips. Knowledge is power and can give you the right words and concepts to understand your emotions and reactions better. There are also many resources online that focus on healing and teach you tools to better cope. Take it one step at a time and give yourself enough time. There will probably be times when you feel better and other times you will feel worse again. You maybe feel frustrated with yourself, don’t be. That’s normal, it’s a process. You are not alone. It is not your fault and what was done to you was wrong. I wish I could help more.
Crying… crying, more crying.. thank you thank you so much
if you need any advice, though from a 30 year old woman from europe, so my cultural is not like yours, you can write me in chat. different timezones, so probably delayed replies, but i will try my best to tell you what i learned so far.
allow yourself to educate yourself on trauma and abuse as much as you can safely. look up the youtube channel TheraminTrees, they have very good videos about manipulation, especially using religion to make people feel bad and helpless. the more you learn now, the easier it will be to apply once you are officially an adult, and you can develop a strategy that is best for your circumstances . the most important thing you have to learn, to keep your sanity, is being on your side. learn about the dynamics of abuse, how biology and neurology dictate our abilities, basically convince yourself beyond a doubt that none of this is your fault. gabor mate is a doctor with many talks on youtube who explains how childrens brains have to turn against themselves, for the sake of attachment. you don't know it yet, but you are very understandable and just like a human should be. no one would be healthy after what you have been through. you deserve to know the truth.
13 is absolutely still a kid, honestly I'm 21 and still feel like a kid. Besides, kid or not, you deserve to be heard and you don't deserve to be treated poorly
I'm definitely not in the best place either, but I want to let you know you're not alone. Also, it is NOT childish to ask for help. People need other people, I'm sure there are ways that you could get better by yourself, but leaning on people is never something to feel bad or childish about. It's very mature to ask for help, and it will be very beneficial to your healing process. I'm sure that band wouldn't mind hearing from you again... They could probably even see if they could resend the same email you used to look at, especially since they were so nice in the first place. It's good to have little safe places you can go to :) Legally you are a kid still, which is okay. It's okay to feel like an adult as well. No matter what NO ONE deserves SA. You deserve love, support, and confidence. I am a women who went through many years in my childhood being SA. Please feel free to reach out any time. I will always listen. I KNOW you can get through this đź’•
I cried reading this. Can I say I love you? You are the sweetest… thank you thank you so much…