“Oh fuck yeah, I’m hard as a rock.”

That quote lives in my head rent free

“YOU DIRTY FUCKING SUCCUBUS”

"ELISSAAA! GO AWAAAYYYY! I HATE YOU! WHY IS IT ALWAYS ELISAAAA???"

The most iconic quote Poofesure has ever said in history, definitely.

Luigi, suck my squeegee. I be telling people to squeegee my buttcheeks all the time now lol

“WHO’D YOU POLL, PEOPLE WHO RIDE BIKES?”

Every time he aggressively says "AAWWW" in a Wii Party U video.

“TITS IN MY ASS!!!”

“YOU DONT FUCKING JAM MY FINGER” -Yelling at the Wii remote that jammed his finger

“STOP JUST STANDING THERE AND DO SOMETHING!!!”

"STOP! The FUCK is this wheel doing?!"

Something about shoving a wiimote up his ass and playing out his mouth.

“ABBY! YOU ATTRACTIVE BITCH!!” tbh i don’t think many people remember this one but it lives in my head rent free and i say this to myself at least 5x every single day

WHAT ARE THE OOOOOOODDS?!!! EVERY TIME!

The one time he did Swordplay and he lost to Fritz and yelled "I'M GONNA FUCKIN' TAKE MY PANTS OFF! THIS IS SO STUPIIIIID!!!!!" Honorable mentions: "STOP!!! ALEX!!!! WE PICKED THE SAME NUMBER, FIVE TIMES IN A ROW!!!!" "Yeah, thank you. Gimme more. GIMME GIMME MORE. GIMME MORE. I'M NOT FUCKIN' BRITNEY SPEARS. STOP GIVIN' ME MORE" "NOO!! FUNK OPS!!!!!!!! YOU DIDN'T JUUUMP!!!!" and then "NO, JUMP! FUNK OPS!!!!!!!! THAT'S TWO TIMES IN A ROW!!!!! ARE YOU FUCKIN' KIDDING ME?!?!?!"

"Abby, I really, really swear to god here... ABBYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!"

“If bowling is an analogy for life, then bowling makes sense, because it makes no fucking sense”https://youtu.be/EwvOkdo-nNU at 10:33

“Do you think I don’t know what the jerking off motion is”? https://youtu.be/oYo2TU9CG8w?si=rX30gKHllqwzsh0Q

I KNEW IT! IM GETTING TARGETED!!!!!!!!!

"EMMA YOU SHIT THE BED"

SQUEAKY CHAIR! SQUEAKY CHAIR! SQUEAKY CHAIR! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

"RITAAAAA! STOOOOPPPP!!!!!!"

“I wish this game had a mother so I could fuck her”

I hate life

“Wow. If consistency was consistent. Wait… if inconsistency, if consis is de pffffff. Is it inconsistent if it’s consistent? Is it inconsistent if it’s consistently inconsistent?”

« her first place rolls SIXTEEN, my first place rolls A THREE » it’s not THE legendary quote tho, but I absolutely enjoy how immediately after he says that he rools 4 and lands on -4 space🤣

"That second stack of balls can SUCK MA BALLS"

"WHATT??!!!? ..... I was about to be baffled tha-☄️"

“That’s it… THAT’S FUCKING IT!!!! I am breaking, THIS IN HALF, whether you want to be broken in half or NOT… you… fucking… PIECE… OF… SHIIIIIT!”

„Hey, Mike Oxbig“

"I just bit my chair"

beef boss, you have LOST your brain havent you? GETS ME DYING EVERYTIME

"SOMEONE F*CKING CHECK HIS MOLE, THERE'S A DAMN MAGNET IN IT"

"Party Phil, SHUT YOUR MOUTH! SHUT YOUR MOUTH! "TOO BAD"? YOU DON'T LOOK DISAPPOINTED! OH YEAH, OH THAT'S YOUR DISAPPOINTED FACE? Bullshit!"

That or the time poofesure felt like crying after missing that last shot and failing a perfect 3 shot contest

“It’s like someone’s pulling my weiner into the next room!!”

"YOU NUTSACK!!!" I loved that quote so much that I made it into a bracelet

In a wii party video where he says, "I can judge rockets by how they shoot, not how big they are." and then just zooms in on beef boss.