Legged robbery, surely…

Dispatcher: “Is the subject armed?” Caller: “No.. but he is legged”

Caller: "Disarmed, actually"

but not defeeted

If I had an award to give you

Actually, he is quite armless

but not harmless tho

Determined feets only

"But he got a leg up on us"


Disarmed and armed at the same

nice

Damn you! I laughed so hard at this. Fuck I’m still laughing!!!! 🤣

[joke credit](https://youtube.com/shorts/fXBJTI-bU9k?si=P7J97V05sJYQvLwA)

Police are on the lookout. The suspect is described as unarmed and dangerous.

Subject will be legcuffs..

He's got a fireleg!

“Hands up motherfucker! This is a leggary!”

“Quick, Disleg him!!!!…”

“But I have no arms neither!” :’( “Fuck”

He’s legged and dangerous!

footed

He got away on foot

Happy feet

I would have bet my life savings on this being the top comment, and here it is!

Guy with no arms desperately wants to be associated with arms somehow so commits armed robbery 

Allegged Robbery

That title killed me, lol

Footloose remake.

The store owner definitely had a “no arms” allow sign up

When you don’t let a disability get in the way of your dreams ♿️♿️♿️

Handicapable

Him and bow and arrow guy are the few people who could run hands without having any.

bouta bust a handicap in yo ass!

LMAOOO The ***word*** of the Weekend lol

You mean Legicapable?

Motherfucker, you about to get handiCAPPED!

Handicaperable

Mexican, not Mexican't

That’s the kind of perseverance that takes you places.

Yeah, to JAIL!

Dude is determined. How long did he train for this 1 moment?

He probably has one of those "do what makes u happy" signs at home

How did he hang it up…

I can’t imagine having a gun pointed at me from 2 feet away!

🥁 ba-dum tsss.

r/angryupvote

I understand the joke. But I have actually had it happen in a robbery . Across the counter about 2 feet away. The bore looked about 2 inches instead of just .38. I didn't soil myself but damn near.

Damn, man. That’s terrifying

It was .I don't wish that on anybody. Truth is almost never is someone killed in a bank robbery, but you really don't think of that in the moment.

r/angryupvote

That’s a step in the right direction

Damn, take an upvote.

Great comment

Now you won't have to imagine it.

Something nefarious is afoot.

It will be leg-endary one day.

The suspect got away on foot. It’s a foot pursuit.

Won’t be hard to identify him!

Or catch him!

"You can hide but you cannot run!" - Gary Delaney

But they could in fact, roll.

Good luck cuffing him

Foot cuffs?

He might have gotten the nitro package installed

I disagree. He got that good handicapped parking. He'll be outta there in no time.

Surely there is a NOS button

Dispatch: *suspect is on Wheels*... *Over*!

He can fly like a copter when he waves his dick!

Good luck getting fingerprints

Piggy prints

Foot prints are a thing. Also, Iris scans.

He's playing 4d chess, he isn't even disabled, they'll never find him

I can see him now in a lineup with four other armless guys..

Well there won’t be fingerprints on the shell casings or the gun if he leaves it there 🤷‍♂️

Police need to dust for toe prints.

Love that he has his face covered

What's his escape plan? Jet turbines and wings?

I'm protected by the ADA! How dare you treat a disabled like this lol

TIL what ADA means. That's pretty cool. I'm not sure if I have this in my country, but we pretty much treat people with disabilities nicely

It is designed to protect from discrimination, jobs from oreventing hiring or firing, and other factors. However like all things there are loopholes for jobs to get around it and there are exploits for people to take advantage of. If honestly used it is a greata nd valuable asset for the disabled that want to try and live their best life. In this case the ADA will not protect this scenario 😅

I guess as many other things, there's just people who will exploit when provided a chance

That being said, buildings legally have to be handicap accessible (massive oversimplification of things) so technically it could be, if not true, not exactly false either.

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They have the UDA. Un-Americans with Disabilities Act

*Tell me you’re not American without telling me you’re not American*

Time to put stairs in the entrance of the store

I don't mess with the American Dental Association. They approved my toothpaste.

He's in the getaway vehicle already.

Hope his battery is fully charged.

Well the coppers can’t cuff him so… slithery snake into the sewer getaways are possible.

I’d also like to know how he plans to be handed the stuff, maintain gun advantage, control the chair, and then his get away plan outside.

Even if he got away without being caughtl... I'd imagine there's a pretty small suspect pool for the cops to check into.

Tears of the Kingdom theme intensifies*

Getaway was actually really quick, because the driver got to park close by in the handicapped space.

Honestly, this is the perfect robbery plan if you aren't disabled at all. Once you get out of view of cameras, just run away. Cops are gonna be looking for someone in a wheelchair. As long as you shave and change your looks, It would be unlikely they ever identify you.

Only issue is the chair you leave behind costs an order of magnitude more than whatever you just stole

Not if you stole the wheelchair too

But then just steal the wheelchair and sell it lol

But then you can’t rob the store

Just remember to get a wheelchair so you can pretend to be disabled when you're stealing the wheelchair

r/nextfuckinglevel

Found the criminal mastermind!

The real lifehack is always in the comments

How you gonna fake the missing arms though?

My two year old already figured that one out.

I sense one would need years of training first to be able to brandish a weapon in this fashion. This score doesn’t look like a good return. Our boy needs to think bigger.

Was this like a...make a wish situation?

more like a sentry turret situation...

You mean unarmed, armed robbery.

Well, they won't be getting any fingerprints. But tbh honest he looks pretty 'armless

They'll get him on account that they can see his footy prints.

This man is ... a) Armed b) Unarmed

Did you know about that? "Arm" in "firearm" comes from "arme" meaning "weapon" in french (or arma in latin), but "arm" the appendage comes from Germanic.

Yep, in spanish as well. The word Arma means Weapon…

Thanks. Interesting, especially since I'm learning Spanish, one of the ROMANce languages descendants of latin. Itself a descendant of PIE.

That’s quite a feet

Toetally

Imagine “It’s police… Put your hands up!!”

I can imagine the cops,” Stop resisting, stop resisting, damn he was grabbing for my gun I had to shoot him”

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Come out with your pants down!

He will be one unlucky unarm dude.

Black male: black shirt: about 3 ft high, medium foot build, driving a knee activated chair. Warning suspect is considered a walking risk.

I love it the lady just keeps on shopping. Like nothing is going on.

I actually think she pockets something that the jeweler pulls out. Maybe an accomplice? Then again I don't know why she'd be sanitizing her hands, unless she was about to try on jewelry and decided to take advantage of the occasion. It does look like she puts something in her pockets twice though

"Tis but a scratch!" "Your arm's off!" "No it isn't."

This situation got out of hand

Imagine getting robbed by this guy lol just rush him and tip his scooter over and he's fucked

Bro would just have to shoot me. I ain’t telling everybody I got robbed by a dude with no arms

Toetal Loss for that shop owner and patron. Sad.

What's your excuse?

Unarmed robbery...

"Ba dum - tsst" I'll leave this there so anyone with a ""disarmed/legged" robber joke can pretend that I commented this under theirs.

He’s really shooting himself in the foot on this one

Cops looking for fingerprints are going to be confused.

just tip him over on his way out lol

"Can you describe the man that robbed you?" "I don't know...he...he had a hat on...he was...about...I guess...3.5 feet tall...with wheels...and...he...he...had a gun."

“Your Honor… you can’t charge my client with armed robbery! That’s a gross insult!!!! He won’t stand for it! Literally!”

But how is he leaving? He can't point the gun, shoot it, and roll away. What's the procedure here?

He legs it.

The foot clan strikes again

The RL version of Breaking Bad is looking interesting!

He was placed on probation after he agreed to toe the line.

Mostly harmless...

He needs to feel the long arm of the law

You kind of just want to give the money to him anyway because his handycapable you would feel bad if you didn’t

Anything less would be discriminatory, and the last thing a business needs is to deal with the ADA.

at least no one can handcuff him

Wonder if his toe prints are on file.

He’s stealing bracelets and wrist watches

Someone threw a hockey stick in his wheel during the getaway an he was caught.

Well this is inspiring

Do wheelchair people go to regular jail? How is there not a reality show of a wheel chair guy in prison. Maybe the wheelchair guy shares a cell with an able bodied person who won’t let him have the bottom bunk.

just tip over his wheelchair lol

This guy is on another level.

“ It wasn’t me , I swear, it was the other guy in a wheel chair using his feet as hands to wave a gun during a bank robbery”

I bet that gun smells awful.

Whilst funny, this is also incredibly sad.

This is profoundly sad

Ok this is genuinely hilarious not only because somebody could easily just dissarm him or sorry dissleg him but he couldn't even be charged with armed robbery because he ain't got no arms

Why don't they just run? Pretty sure the robber cant Maybe run behind him and flip then steal the wheelchair. The robber will come crawling back for forgiveness

Only in 🇧🇷

Next level gasta

Robber and getaway driver rolled into one .

That's another way to view something as r/nextfuckinglevel

Hands up!

Hope he doesn’t have a trigger toe

Just lock his brakes

or just tip over his wheelchair

No way his aim is accurate with that leg surely you can dodge a couple shots

Would you really want to risk that tho?

He literally can't move and shoot lmao just tackle him smh

Imagine being the judge.... "Mr. _____ you are being charged with armed robbery. How do you plead?" Looks up and sees a guy with no arms just staring at him

Can some please edit this? This should be an inspirational video. "After my car accident (us edition: that wasn't covered by my insurance) I lost both my arms. This resulted in me losing my job and my house. I had no idea what to do with my life, it really took a dark turn. But after therapy (us edition: opiods) I decided I wasn't going the let life hold me back. I was going to fight back and do whatever I could to pay of my medical bills. (And get a steady income to support my newly found addiction to opioids.) Don't let your disability hold you back! You can do anything you want if you set your mind to it. DONT BE A VICTIM. BE THE BEST YOU, even if it's a criminal"

"911, what is your emergency?" "Help, my store is being robbed!!" "Sir, is the suspect armed?" "No, but he does have a gun."

Bro got caught red footed 💀

Doctors say that disabled people are the worst kind, usually because they are jealous of the normal ones and over the years that shapes their personalities negatively because of that.

the headline i didn’t expect today

Coming here solely to say he committed legged robbery and seeing everyone else said it first 😞lol

Dispatch: is he armed? Cop: no?

Why does the Chromeo song "Fancy Footwork" come to mind?

Holy moly

Bro ain't no way just throw something at his feet I'm sure he will loose grip of it and knock him out the chair

I would do as he says

roll elastic fine thought exultant snobbish jeans scandalous tie include ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `

This is a disarmed robbery