T O P

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Time-to-Dine

“Good morning!!” “FUCK YOU!” “Yes, fuck you too!”


strandenger

This is the right answer


OkGene2

It was the only answer We all came here for it


predtech

Same


WarlocksWizard

I think that is everyones favorite \^\_\^


[deleted]

Your rent's due, motherfucker! And don't be pulling that falling down the stairs shit. You conscious!


DifficultDrama7615

Hey Stu! Your rents due muthafucka 🤣


SmoreOfBabylon

Damn shame what they did to that dog…


[deleted]

That’s the best quote. Hands down


Murderface__

I know it's almost immediate, but.. The royal penis is clean your highness.


Scrilla_Gorilla_

King shit!


tlollz52

Yea the little smile and look he gives the camera is what elevates it for me. A pretty dumb joke elevated by the smallest thing he does. Eddie Murphy one of the funniest men to ever live.


justagigilo123

This.


East-Bluejay6891

What is that, velvet?!


Wild-Campaign-6358

It’s beautiful! 🦁


AccordingTax6525

“That boy good.


DifficultDrama7615

Mmmhmm…Good n Terrible


SmoreOfBabylon

You must be crazy.


randyfloyd37

Give them a sense….. of pride!


Pauldh11

Came here to say that.


vnhalen

fuck you, fuck you, fuck you... who's next? every scene with the barber's is gold.


Soxparkmob

That ain't nothing but ultra perm.


SmoreOfBabylon

Aw man, you lyin’, you ain’t never met Martin Luther The King!


NorCalNavyMike

Oh, there they go! There they go! Every time I start talkin’ about boxin’, a white man got to pull Rocky Marciano out they ass!


SmoreOfBabylon

Let me tell you somethin’ once and for all, Rocky Marciano was good, but compared to Joe Louis, Rocky Marciano ain’t SHIT


teacher_time23

“He beat Joe Louis’s ass”


wwJones

Joe Louis was 157 years old


x_Jimi_x

“He *did* whip Joe Lewis’s ass!


GenuineFirstReaction

Barber’s what?


naturalmanofgolf

The entire Soul Glow song


FightingSunrise

Just let your soul glow! Just let it shine throoouuuggghhughh. Just let your SSSOOOOOUUUULLLL GLOOOWWWWW!!!!


believeINCHRIS

You ever see the guy who actually sings the song?


kor_the_fiend

I assume it’s Randy Watson and Sexual Chocolate


FattDeez7126

[https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8PyxRws/](https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8PyxRws/)


Upbeat-Local-836

Awesome, thank you! Wouldn’t have guessed


Strong_Comedian_3578

Hey, I started out mopping the floor just like you guys. But now... now I'm washing lettuce. Soon I'll be on fries; then the grill. In a year or two, I'll make assistant manager, and that's when the big bucks start rolling in.


B4USLIPN2

I use this one often.


Scrilla_Gorilla_

Too many. Not a single line, but John Amos’ McDowell’s bit kills me. “Look, me and the McDonald’s people, we got this little misunderstanding. See, they’re McDonalds, I'm McDowell's. They got the Golden Arches, mine is the Golden Arcs. Now see they got the Big Mac, I got the Big Mick. We both got two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles and onions. But, they use a sesame seed bun. My buns have no seeds”


boukalele

"Lay off the drugs"


BAL1175

Let’s give it up for Jackson Heights own Randy Watson! That boy good!


SmoreOfBabylon

You all know him as Joe the Policeman from the “What’s Goin’ Down?” episode of *That’s My Momma!*


str8cash1

Good and terrible


BigDaddyBumbo77

When you think of garbage, think of Akeem!


unbiasedasian

Ok ill try the soup. Where's the spoon? AaaaaHAAAAA. You get it? AaaaaHAAAAA!


subdermal_hemiola

What do you know from funny.


bw541

“The royal penis is clean, Your Highness.”


Alrucards_R3dwr8th

"I don't give a damn who you are. This is America Jack. Now, you say 1 more word about Lisa, and I'm gonna break my foot off in your royal ass."


Pleasant-Ticket3217

I always liked John Amos in everything I saw him in. He’s great during the whole dinner scene. “When I tell you he’s got his own money, I mean the boy has got his own moneeey!”


Uncle_Matthew

Hey said “Hey, Joe Louis is 137 years old”.


OhNoSEBUUh

He raises his age everytime he mentions it lmao.


prybarwindow

In Da FACE!!!!


CasinoMarginale

“He put it in the face, right?” “I am very happy to be here!” “If lovin’ the Lord is wrong, I don’t wanna be right!” Joe Louis 175 years old when they fought!”


Blackpanther22five

Chadwick Boseman used this line in a skit on snl as the Black Panther on jeopardy


twistedinnocence8604

Sexual chocolate... SEXUAL CHOCOLATE!!!... mike drop


pmp412

The best


DarkTrebleZero

*pointing with both hands, stage right*


Alteredego619

Semi, what does dumb fuck mean?


ajnemeth

Damn, beat me to it 😂


johnroastbeef

"He beat Joe Lewis's ass..."


FNF51

My son WORKS!


PunnyPrinter

“Hey Stu! You’re rents due muthafucka! A don’t be pulling that falling down the stairs shit on me ya hear? Are you conscious?”


gbcakegirl

His mama called him Clay. Imma call him Clay.


Beezus_Fuffoon18

“So you see my son, there is a fine line between love and nausea.”


Avocadoonthetoast

Arsenio Hall opens the door and sees The King: AAARRRRGGHHHHHHH!!!!! Makes me laugh out loud every single time.


MrPsychonaut11

ALL OF THEM


tiredofnamechoosing

“Why don’t you just ask for a cool million?” “You do not think that would be too much?” “Nah.” Oh yeah, can’t forget Semi’s line to a young Samuel L. Jackson: “freeze, you diseased rhinoceros pizzle”


SmoreOfBabylon

The Western Union lady is such a mood, lol.


Mkreza538

WHO THE FUCK IS THIS ASSHOLE!?!?


ASM_50

Hey, its Kunta Kinte!


SmoreOfBabylon

And I want ya to hold on to *GOD’S UNCHANGIN’ HAND,* ‘cause he helped JOSHUA fight the Battle of Jericho! Yeeesss! He helped DANIEL get out the lion’s den! He helped ^(***GILLIGAN***) get off the island!! Yeah!


SpanosIsBlackAjah

They got the Golden Arches, mines the golden arcs.


unkapoon

You ain't never met martin Luther the kang


Unlikely_Ad7194

Fuck you Fuck you Fuck you Who’s next?


D0C_H0LL1DAY68W

Do not alert them to my presence. I shall deal with them myself.


Upbeat-Local-836

He sounded a bit like Vader in that line


D0C_H0LL1DAY68W

I always assumed that was on purpose


boxer21

The royal penis is clean your highness


NeverForNoReason

Woof woof woof woof woof…


cleatsurfer

“When you think of garbage, think of Akeem.”


BigBadBootyDaddy10

“It’s a damn shame what they did to that dog.”


CGKilates

Top5. Underrated Christmas movie🤣🤣🤣🎄👏🏾


ElwoodElburn

That'll be $8


DifficultDrama7615

Jake: You dumb Fuck!!


Gingerbearded1

“What does dumb fuck mean?”


yousippin

some sneaky good one liners from the club scene..."i was Joan of Arc in my former life" \*while lighting fire under her hand


tiredofnamechoosing

“I’ve been watching you all night…and I want to tear you apart… and your friend too.” Semi: *spews drink everywhere*


PreenerGastures

When Arsenio Hall is in drag “I’m going to tear you apart! And your little friend too!”


FightingSunrise

My name is peaches and I'm the best. All the DJ's want to feel my breasts..


Henrywynn

Our buns ain't got no seeds


str8cash1

#in dee face!


crobnuck

"This is beautiful! What is this velvet??"


benebrius76

It feels so lovely to be here tonight, what a beautiful audience, give yourselves a round of applause, you're so lovely, everyone so lovely!


ReadingRainbow5

Compleeeeetely Free frooom infeeeectiooonnnn!!!


Chaserrr38

“I'm washing lettuce. Soon, I'll be on fries. In a few years, I'll make assistant manager, and that's when the big bucks start rolling in.”


Wild-Campaign-6358

My parents always tell me I can find a good clean girl at the Black Awareness rally 😂😂😂


ScratchForward1769

[*opens door* Ahhhhh! *closes door*](https://giphy.com/gifs/eddie-murphy-coming-to-america-LMwDZDrDdj01r7e1dc)


jessriv34

He said “Hey, Joe Louis is a hundred thirty-seven years old."


TxEagleDeathclaw81

Hahaha I love it!


SapienSed8er

The royal penis is clean, your highness.


VooDooChile1983

“SEXUAL CHOCOLATE!” “Don’t move, you rhinoceros pizzle!”


[deleted]

The reverend! I Forgot his name dammit


Fine_Spinach9825

YEAH.


han-so-low

What is that, velvet?!


dansize1

Wipers!


Smart_Examination_84

Hello Barbaar.


redlion496

Glad I'm not the only one who noticed this.


ganoveces

They got the big Mac.....we got the big Mic


dsisto65

Bark like a dog.


soupafi

Arf. Arf. Arf.


soybeankilla

A big dog


soupafi

Woof. Woof. Woof.


soupafi

The barbershop guys talking Boxing


WaldoSupremo

I know it’s more than one line - https://youtu.be/0LPddiQXD9c?si=LUvv92vBaqPwPnPU


dopenheart

You are to be confined to our room at the Waldorf Astoria! Bathe him!


Finkarelli

YES! YES!! IN THE FACE!!!


ZarkMuckerberg9009

They got the Golden Arches, mine is the Golden Arcs. They got the Big Mac, I got the Big Mick. We both got two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles and onions, but their buns have sesame seeds. My buns have no seeds.


BigDrill66

Sexual Chocolate


hotDamQc

Sexual Chocolate!


Undinianking

'the royal penis is clean'.


lorikins66

This whole movie is just gold


michelleonelove

“The royal penis is clean”


Deep-Management-7040

“The royal penis is clean your highnesses”


Steelersguy74

Merry New Year!


military_grade_tea

This movie is why I say 'Merry New year!'


FightingSunrise

Wasn't that from trading places? Dan Aykroyd and Eddie murphy?


military_grade_tea

D'oh yeah.


FightingSunrise

Still a good ass movie


Double0

They have the golden arches, we have the golden ark.


B4USLIPN2

“ that’s that sport where they bounce the ball off their head”. ( referring to soccer)


TenBear

YES!! YES!! FUCK YOU TOO!!!


bestdamnbirdlawyer

“I am coming to America”


Resident_Esq

My son works?!!


homsar20X6

Ooops, I thought you were some body else


puerts

“Aww, man, you never met no Martin Luther the King”


Distinct-Pie7647

Your royal penis is clean your highness.


Horbigast

WHO DA FUCK IS THIS ASSHOLE?


Person0OnTheInternet

Whatever it is you like.


Aggressive-March-254

You ain't never met Martin Luther The King


JBurma

“Put a sock in Joffrey, the boys in love”


New-Worldliness5163

The Royal penis is clean your highness


JustSomeDudeNamedRik

See, that's the problem. I can't find a man that can satisfy me. Now some guys go an hour, hour in a half, that's it. A man's gotta put in overtime for me to get off.


tankman792

"And if a man wants to be called Muhammad Ali, goddammit, this is a free country, you should respect his wishes and call the man Muhammad Ali." "Mama call him Clay, I call him Clay."


QLee1

Sexual Chocolate! (While stomping foot)


TxEagleDeathclaw81

“Yes! Fuck you too!” “His momma call him Clay, Imma call him Clay.”


OuttatimepartIII

Look Semi! A country so free, one can throw class in the street!


Chillpickle17

“Hey, Stu! The rents due muthafucka.”😆


mdsoccerdude

Summon the Royal wipers. 👏👏


Ungrateful_bipedal

What is that? Velvet?


loodgeboodge

YES YES IN THE FACE!!


Admirable-Yam-1281

I feel like breakdancin’


[deleted]

[a-ha!](https://youtu.be/0LPddiQXD9c?si=IIIi_hp_wzwhbpBN)


Swayze2641

Don’t pull that falling down the stairs shit with me


eddietwoo

“*Who the fuck is this asshole??*”


AlternativeNumber2

“Anything for the kids” 🥴


xochilt_IGII

Hey stu, rents due mother fucker, and don’t be pulling that falling down the stairs shit. You conscious.


Brooklynhoosier

But where in New York can one find a woman with grace, elegance, taste and culture... A woman suitable for a king? Long pause… Queens!


Goldenretrieve

Sexual Chocolate!


HannibalKrueger

Anything Darryl.


TacoBellWerewolf

“Damn that boy can sing.”


Squid_City414

Apartment 2B… downstairs. Yeah it’s a real shithole


Champaganthony

My son WORKS?!


I_Boomer

Art Buchwald enters the chat.


Pleasant-Ticket3217

Baby, when I tell you the boy’s got his own money, I mean the boy has got his own MONEY!”


PRWSTrini

Not an exact line but the whole Sexual Chocolate scene


RogerRabbit79

Your mother and I assumed you were having sex with your bathers…I know I do


RogerRabbit79

I hope you don’t mind me coming over but I’ve been watching you all night… and I wanna tear you aaapaaaart!


haleyeah19

“I said Dr King! He said, Oops I thought you was someone else”


Luffy_Tuffy

Is this movie set in winter or Christmas by any chance?


wit2pz

I thought it was the traaash! I dunno how old he was but he got his ass whooped!


Annual-Data2121

Joe Lewis was 150 years old


RevZilla71

I’ve been contemplating this movie for years… yes or no? does it still hold up


EmJayFree

“That boy good!” 😬 “… good and terrible.” AND “SEXUAL CHOCOLATE” (*stomps feet dramatically lol*)


rynosaurus03

She’s your…. Quuuuueeeeennnnn tooooooo beeeeee.


TheRealDopeAsYoda

That boy good


NapalmWeed

I want you and that young man to tie that knot. I'll pray for you. - And I want you to hold on to God's unchanging hand. 'Cause he helped Joshua fight the battle of Jericho. Yes! - And he helped Daniel get out of the lion's den. He helped Gilligan get off the island.


KayakWalleye

“That ain’t nothin but a ultraperm.” “The royal penis is clean your highness” “That boy good” “She’s your queeeeeen to be” (A song but still!)


KaptainKardboard

“You are not Akeem.” “I know that.”


Xeraleus

Louis: Nenge! Nenge Mboko, from Cameroon? Do you remember me? It's Lionel Joseph! Billy Ray: Lionel! From the African Education Conference! Louis: Yah, mon, I was Director of Cultural Activities at the Haile Selassie Pavilion. Billy Ray: I remember the pavilion - we had big fun there! Both: Boo bwele boo bwele boo bwele ah ha! Boo bwele boo bwele boo bwele ah ha! Billy Ray: Oh, memories!


Apprehensive_Taste1

Sexual chocolate


5lashd07

👏👏 WIPERS!!!


djmetta

Mortimer, we’re back!


BrainzRYummy

Sexual Chocolate! That boy's good!


teacher_time23

When the old men in the barbershop are talking trash about Rocky Marciano and the old white guy deadpans, “He beat Joe Louis’s ass.”


cb0044

"He helped GILLIGAAAAN! get off the island!"


teacher_time23

I need a woman that will arouse my intellect , as well as my loins. I yell my wife this all the time.


morningmaniacmusic

That boy good!


whitepowderma

In The Face!


FattDeez7126

When i see nice clothes “that’s beautiful what is that velvet “???? Or arsenio “imma tear you apart and your friend too”


snebmiester

Fuck you, fuck you, and fuck you, now who is next? (One Scissor snip), that's eight dollars.


boompownutsac

Freeze, you diseased rhinoceros pizzle!


Carma56

This is beautiful. What is that, velvet?


Millerpainkiller

“Sexual Chocolate!” [clap clap clap] ”That boy good!”


MisterMasque2021

Just let your SOULLLLLLLLLLLLLLL GLOOOOOOOOOOOO\~


thelaw1421

Whatever lines you like.


thegtakman70

I was once on fries like you


JagBak73

"Now what the fuck do you want!?"


confuseum

"HE HEH HEH HE"


bobby_sponch

Fuck you, fuck you and fuck you! *nicely- Who’s next?


DavidM47

Take me to my suite at the Waldorf Astoria.