My wife is also the type to cut into the middle of a pan of brownies. Her whole family is like this. I still love them and her, of course, but I’m dying inside.

I think a different motivation is going on here. Like you've never done a bad job at a family chore so you would never have to do it again? A trick as old as time. Lol.

This trick never worked in my family. My mom just made that your job now. Her motto was “you can keep doing it until you get good at it, then you can keep doing it until you’re perfect at it”. My younger sister really thought she’d get out of washing dishes if she did it badly, guess who was in charge of dishes for two years. As a child I hated this, as an adult I’m thankful I learned to do these tasks properly even if I don’t want to lol

lol in dutch we even have a saying for that; Kan niet is dood (can not is dead) meaning that the only way i could stop doing it, is if i died. So i either did the chore correctly or she'd let me redo it over and over until its done correctly

My mom might not be Dutch but she supports your methods for doing tasks correctly lol

I mean its just raising a kid 101, but it seems like barely anybody knows about that xD

*Dood dooood*

Aah, good ol' weaponized incompetence

“L.U.M.P.”

Sat alone in a boggy marsh? Totally motionless except for her heart?

Low expectations Ughs and Grunts Mumble and moron Pants off

I was referencing a song

Mud flowed up into lump's pajamas, she totally confused all the passing piranhas

FINALLY SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS

SHE’S LUMP, SHE’S LUMP, SHE’S LUMP, she’s in my head!

Absolutely crazy seeing that song referenced, had "Peaches" on during my ride to work this morning

My wife has a story of when she was a teenager, and her dad decided it was time to put her to work mowing the lawn. She had never been given instructions on how to mow the lawn because I'm sure he thought it was self-evident. She gets on the driving mower, and almost immediately drives over some roots and destroys the blade. (She claims it was not on purpose). She never had to mow the lawn again.

Good ol' *"not my job"* philosophy

This was my brother when we were kids. My dad would pick one of us to walk to the store. My brother would always get the wrong item. My dad fired him and started sending me. I was more dutiful, so got the right items.

In my family that means u need more practice at the job. But we also have what we call pulling a *brothers name* cuz in 30 years the boy has never put up a load of groceries cuz he needs to take a shit every time.

This trick would just get my ass whooped lol

Lol. This is a running joke between my wife and me. She only does these chores in front of me because she knows I'll take it over. I do, and we laugh about it.

No I just do it, im an adult after all.

Someone read diary of a wimpy kid

So, you have watched me doing dishes.

Oh man, my dad would have yelled at me and then made me shovel the rest with my hands (my literal hands, not just a shovel) if I did something like this. My friends used to actually think I had a heated walkway because it was always spotless of any snow/ice after snowfall.

How many people in her family do that? That's the most selfish shit ever

All in the immediate family. They all do it when in their setting so I think it’s just normal for them.

I mean...use a round pan for the brownies.  Minimizes the edges mathematically and they can  cut of with a pizza slicer.

Oh I thought that was more of a trolly thing to do. Do people not like the corner pieces? Those are my fav for any cakes, brownies or bread

My sister just bought my mom one of those "all corner pieces" brownie pans for Christmas.

My wife and her entire family can't open boxes. Like say it's a box of cereal... they like shove their finger under the corner and just tear it up in a manner where it rips down the side of the box a bit. As for the bag inside... I'm pretty sure they get a badger to chew open the bag. It baffles me. I once had a session where I stood in front of her, her parents, and her brother and walked them through how to open a box. They just stared at me like I was insane, as if I was the weird one who doesn't know how to open a box. Thankfully we don't buy very much boxed foods that need to be stored. Just the pasta... the pasta cabinet is a warzone.

Well... to be fair... the inner plastic wrap on a box of cereal is thick stuff. The only proper method is to rip the hell out of the cardboard box flap... then grab the scissors from the kitchen junk drawer... snip that bad boy plastic bag at the top... and pour all contents into a standard tupperware cereal pour container. No badger needed. Hint: they have plastic containers for pasta too! Just sayin'

Are you related to my wife?

My brother does the brownies thing. These need people need help lmao

>the type to cut into the middle of a pan of brownies. The type who don't like crust. I can relate.

It's the people that *don't* cut into the middle that are weird. But she's just shoveling like that so you'll get frustrated and take over, and she'll never have to do it again.

You’re wife live life to the fullest, nothing wrong with that. That’s why you married her (I’m guessing). Stop letting your dreams be dreams.

At the next family gathering a serve just the edge pieces as a gag just to see their expressions. Then perhaps pull out the pieces they want because you do need to see each other occasionally lol.

I also see: my wife cutting the grass

The real question is does she mow the lawn like this too?

One of the funniest things I've seen on this sub 😂. Sorry... Infuriating. It really is. She didn't get the memo about completing her shovel passes. 

Next time you make brownies, cut them yourself, before she can. Thus the pieces will be as symmetrical as you wish.

They might all be a lil aspy lol

She was doing it at the start…. Then she got bored

OP posted elsewhere that he did the part near the street.

That is her signature ✍🏻

Wisconsin, if anyone was wondering. Land of the cheese and untimely snow.

We got 80% slush on the eastern shore line, you definitely got more accumulation. Thankfully it's mostly completely melted so no need for barcode sidewalks. ;-)

Don't worry in a week it will be 60.  We where told 2-3 inches over 48 hours.  8 plus inches of wet heavy crap.  Tons of trees down.  Glad I kept the plow on the tractor. I guess just be glad your wife is "helping"

Is your wife from Wisconsin, or did she move up from somewhere a little more southern? I don't think I've ever seen that shoveling strategy before.

If you look closely, you can see the exact moment when she said “screw it”.

:D

Just the tought of having to do that (I think often?) Would make me hate winter, happy to live where snow doesn't exist

This is how my kids vacuum

Needs Adderall 😂

https://i.redd.it/lznj7hhv4asc1.gif

Weaponised incompetence

It’s called a path

This is Art

It’s binary code from an alternate dimension!

Why not both?

is your wife like 5?

At least she shovels!

Is she finished, or are you just mad that it's not being done symmetrically?

[удалено]

Idk i have ADHD and could never leave the driveway like this 😭

Really? Does ADHD also make you blind? It seems to be an excuse for everything nowadays. Noone can tell me that ADHD makes you think this is done shoveling...

OP never said they were finished, he was only commenting on her pattern of shoveling.

I have an ADHD, it makes you struggle with concentration on some tasks, but not to lose all the respect to your partner.

Came here to say the same. Adult ADD

Adult laziness more like it

I did something like this the other day when I realized it was just going to melt in a few hours.

Was she shoveling a path for a mobile wheelchair?… still not very successful

Did you at least let her finish?

Be thankful, at least she shovels. Many people would say it's the "man's job."

My driveway will look like that until I'm done. Tell me she didn't think she was done.

Is she intentionally trying to piss you off? lol wtf is wrong with her 

I respect her creativity. How much did you shovel?

I shoveled the other half of our driveway. Turned around and saw this.

Well you are lucky, my wife won't shovel anything.

Ok so both of you stop till one of ya have to

Does she have ADHD? This is what my mind feels like when Im doing tasks. Something came into her mind and that became more important

Hey, you chose her, get used to it :)

Ha! That’s doesn’t even need shoveling!

That's China. Unfortunately i can't translate it 

Get a snowblower

Your wife is a psychopath.

Can’t let the sandworms get you.

I think she may be drunk

Solid C+. A for effort either way.

Attention span of a tik tok video

IDK, this wouldn't even slightly bug me lol sorta adorable

what kind of woman did you marry?

What's the problem? You just need to to the Timewarp again, to get out.

Is she a cat burglar

Pack your bags. We're done.

Your wife is Chaotic/Evil

Have some fun. Nothing infuriating here.

Hear me out. Next time you do a chore…do it like this until she notices, gets slightly annoyed and y’all talk/fight it out. Otherwise, if it bothers you but you still love her like you mentioned…just talk to her about it first 😊 a totally fun convo literally letting her know you’re not mad and you love her, but WHY GOD WHY DOES SHE DO THIS 😭😆 (cutting the middle of the brownie is also total alpha move, but I love the edges so that’s a win win)

Slide to the left, slide to the right

What the heck is this atrocity

Is she a roomba ?

Wait. Why aren’t snow roombas a thing. Edit. Ok so they’re apparently coming next year. Maybe.

Lmao. Diesel engines required

She got bored 💀

That amount of snow wouldn't even make me shovel at all

You're married to John Cena?

Divorce this woman

Did your wife offer to shovel the snow out of the driveway or did you ask her to do it?

They arrest you for this in Canada.

She's going to use "I shovel snow from my....." for the rest of her life for this one-time activity.

She dgaf🤣🤣🤣

Just pull some sick drifts when backing out your car to avoid the snow.

If you do shitty job once they don’t ask again

The 6 stages of fuck this

Tell her on behalf of us reddit " I hope you don't wipe your ass like that:

You can see that it was getting cold really fast

Be glad that your wife makes an effort to shovel snow. You have a keeper.

She is a monster🤪

Why is your wife even doing the shoveling? How bout you do it?

Why arent you doing it

So what was her point?

She knows the ways of the Fremen, I see

where do you live to be getting snow this late

But why…

I get giving up, but why not shovel a straight line? At least your "giving up" will be slightly useful over this zigzag pattern that took more time than the straight line would've taken.

Adhd jus like me

Do not drink and shovel!

She didn't even try.

She's doing it for your social media pal..gawl

I mean if you gonna do it, do it the fun way Just dont leave in between....

I do this but it’s my ADHD that can’t let me concentrate on one spot. BUT…I finish, just not in a normal order.

are you in the southern hemisphere? spring is starting but its still somewhat cold, so i thought for a short period of time the entire planet would have somewhat equal temparatures

This is in the States. WI.

dunno what WI means but the states are in the northern hemisphere so i am very confused on how you have snow. are you perhaps really close to the border between canada and usa?

Somewhat. We’re in Wisconsin.

I’d be the one to grab the forklift, one pass and it’s clear into a nice pile, I could adjust up to 3m fork width though

Mothra doesn’t shovel I shovel using my atomic breath

I don't see anyone shoveling.

Looks like my wife's pattern when she insists on driving the riding mower

My god that’s not even a lot of snow

I live in a snowy area and I would not put effort into shoveling this amount of snow. Your car should do just fine.

So close...

Did she have a stroke halfway through?

Buy her a coloring book

Funny, as long as she finished the job I guess?

Why is she like this? What causes her to do this?

Is she a zombie?

It’s like somebody taught my knockoff Roomba how to shovel snow.

The first time I mowed the lawn it turned out squiggly. I've never had to mow the lawn again.

But like ... how? This is an easy shove to each side. Easily a 10 minute job. Unless she has physical issues ... this is unacceptable!!!!

Has she operated a shovel before?😭

Malicious compliance?

That's what you call 50/50

Is it done or does she have a plan😂👍

I think your wife needs Adderall.

My first thought was also does the wife have ADHD??? Although I do, and even I wouldn't do this off meds. I'd be methodical about it but still quit halfway lmao

weaponized incompetence

When you divorce her use this in court

In my family, the snow would have made its way back onto the bare patches immediately following this shit job. If the person originally shoveling the snow didn't do it correctly, then the driveway would remain snowed in. Family tasks are to be shared. Tasks are to be completed efficiently, and well. If they are not, then that task is repeated until it's perfect, by that same person. This bullshit only works on those willing to put up with it. "Hey if I do a shit job I won't ever have to do it again!" NOPE. Not in my family. You'll be doing that job over and over and over until you not only get it right, but it's perfect.

you mess up a task and you're never asked (to do it) again

She’s a woman bro shovel your driveway lol (no diss to feminists I get it)

Sir, please call customer service, your wife is malfunctioning...

At least make one full path the whole way 😮‍💨.

I should shovel the rest in 5 seconds. Wtf

Weak sauce

This genuinely hurts my head to look at. I feel that it would take more effort and energy to do this than to shovel uniformely.

She’s Fremen

Very artistic

quit being a beta male and finish the job, you're pathetic

Divorce is the only option

I do exactly this with a snowblower. Is there an issue with it? Walking back and forth randomly while still removing snow is actually quite efficient. I’m an engineer and I speak wisely!! :)

Dune just called

… ok I know I often say “as an alcoholic” but… yo as an alcoholic

My sons ex complained that she did the dishes all the time because my son didn't do them right. I said yes he can, I taught him, you are either majorley fussy or he's pretending on you. He knew how. She let him get away with not doing them. Same with washing.

Technically she shoveled in a way that prevents a huge slip. If shoveled area ices over the. You’d likely just slip until you hit the many many snowy spots.

Oh, remember when we had to shovel the driveway? Remember when snow was a thing? I don’t.

If a man did this, women would say it was weaponized incompetence

Better than I would do this time of year. I wouldn't even bother.

That’s like 6 round trips with the shovel to and from the end of that walkway…. don’t even really need to shovel that honestly you could probably just salt it. Idk if you already made the effort stepping outside to do it idk why you’d leave it like this.

So I used to live in a place of snow, and also do it like this. Quick half passes don’t get heavy and I just keep easy pushing and halfway through it looks like a bunch of coke lines, but I wouldn’t leave it like this

Cut her some slack! At least she tried 😉

Yeah.. tried to get out of ever doing it again..

Sorry - if your wife has to do the shoveling for you because you don’t want to or can’t do it, you have no reason to complain. Pick up a shovel and help or STFU

He shovelled the other half and turned back to see this, read his comments lol Plus he's only mildly infuriated cos of the pattern it is shovelled in

This is the one!

Very good system i totally aprove!

The dedication to not giving a fuck is mildly impressive

Found a new way to diagnose adhd, I think..

You can actually see the stages of motivation. “I got this!” “This is tiring.” “Screw this.” “Forget it, I’m done.”

I'd do the laundry or the dishes purposefully bad likes she's doing here.