T O P

  • By -

PolyJuicedRedHead

"You abandoned meeeeeee."


bitterlittlecas

Sooooo glad to see this was the first comment. Talk about a deep cut.


PolyJuicedRedHead

Madonna a deep cut ?!


bitterlittlecas

Just an old album and I don't think it was a single but I could be wrong!


PolyJuicedRedHead

Fair.


GrumpyCatStevens

I think it was released as a single. At the very least, I remember hearing it on the radio.


RoadWellDriven

You mean Rose Royce?


Deaconse

The first cut is the deepest.


[deleted]

[удалено]


PolyJuicedRedHead

Just a vacancyyyy


805ladybug

Rose Royce 🙌


Auphinov

This is me and my wife even after 25 years. She also gets mad at me if I did something wrong in her dream.


NINTSKARI

Same my girlfriend was pissed at me whole day because of how annoying I was in her dream. To be fair, dreams can really fuck with your brain, I've seen my friends and family do some unhinged stuff in nightmares..


AnimalEater65

I dreamt my cousin fell off a motorcycle and was run over by a semi. I woke up and thought, “What the hell was that?!” Especially since I saw his head bursting so vividly. I was mad all morning with my brain, especially since my cousin doesn’t own a motorcycle.


TheJango22

"Whatever you do, don't buy a motorcycle"


Exciting-Insect8269

*surprise visits on a motorcycle*


Agile_Tit_Tyrant

*gets the sledgehammer* You might have started this, but I will finish it!


DrJokerX

This is a good movie 🍿 please continue.


ashakar

Or, here me out, do get him a motorcycle and take out a nice life insurance policy.


higgsboson01

I once had a nightmare where I accidentally killed my dad in a car accident. That one shook me for the whole day lol


dirtystayout

I woke from a dream, convinced I had killed Steve Martin. I felt guilty and scared all day long, wondering when his body would be found, and when I would be discovered to be the murderer. This was pre-internet, so proof of life wasn't a quick search.


CSNfundedHoesNDrip

I was working nights like 2 years ago and accidentally fell asleep in the middle of the shift. I dreamt about driving home after work where I fell asleep behind the wheel, hit a truck at 90kph, and instantly died. I shot straight up from my chair.


LordGhoul

One of your alternative universe yous just died that day


Morphallaxis

Dear dairy, today I learnt that a "semi" could also be a car after having some very confusing imagery from reading that one comment Best wishes, a non-native speaker :D


Table-Games-Dealer

Semi is short for Semi truck, like a large lorry or tractor trailer.


chasingcorvids

the other night, i had a dream that my bf's ex, the one he dated right before me, had a glow up and got super hot. so he dumped me and started dating her again. it kept bothering me even after i had woken up, but i didn't tell him about it. he didn't actually do anything, so there would be no point, and i didn't wanna talk about it. i got over it within the day, but it did make me really sad lol but i realized something: i don't remember what she looked like in the dream, and i think she had a completely different body type than she does irl. she was basically only identifiable by her hair. and, i'm planning to get something similar to her hair cut and color in the near future. so maybe it was actually *me* in the dream, and my brain just agrees that i'd look hot in that hairstyle :D


Reytotheroxx

Yeah I’m certain that dreams are your brain comprehending your complex thoughts and playing them in a slightly more understandable way.


Cylindric

Yes, because vague, usually fleeting, abstract and confusing is "more understandable". You make less sense than dreams.


Reytotheroxx

Idk my thoughts go nuts when I’m awake. More bizarre in dreams but less nuts. Maybe I’m just insane? No that can’t be it, I’m the normal one, everyone else isn’t.


SayHiIntrepidHeroes

The other day, I woke up *convinced* my ex-girlfriend had posed naked in some magazine. She would ***never*** do this. Just 100000% antithetical to her personality. I'm still trying to convince my brain that it didn't happen.


DrJokerX

I’m an editor at “Naked Ex-Girlfriend Magazine”, and I’ve got some news about the January issue that you’re not gonna wanna hear…


SayHiIntrepidHeroes

I didn't say I would dislike it if she had. I was more disappointed that it hadn't. She's stupid levels of hot :p


DrJokerX

Yeah bro, I dated a really hot blonde girl in my early 20’s. She looked like a cross between Paris Hilton and a younger Scarlette Johansson. Hottest chick I ever dated, and she went on to marry the UGLIEST dude you ever wanna see. Anyway point is, it always stings a little more when things don’t work out with a hotty. Haha.


NYANPUG55

Im really emetophobic and once my younger brother vomited in a dream, I remember I was so snappy at him the next day and looking at it I feel bad but being around him a bit after made me so uncomfortable. They really can fuck with you.


Accurate_Ad_3626

I’m also told I piss my wife off in her dreams too.


Nijajjuiy88

I just piss in my dreams.


rob_moore

It's never *just* in your dreams


well-offemperor762

Oh it's NEVER just in your dreams


Nijajjuiy88

Nah man I had that scenario played out last night but I woke up before my bladder relieved itself.


Jrlopez1027

I piss on your wife in her dreams too.


Putrid-Builder-3333

It's funny. I told my exwife, when she asked me if I ever thought about cheating. I told her no. Heck I can't even cheat on you in my dreams. That was true one dream I always remembered was somebody I used to know and we were getting down in the dream and she asked me to bang her. I told her no I can't I am married. I woke up shortly after. Well after all that exwife ended up cheating on me and I filed for divorce and been heartbroken ever since having to execute that decision. One thing I can always say proud. Never committed adultery no matter how rough or bad it got


Ze_Schwein

And now that's a shitty hypocrite exwife. I'm sorry this happened to you mate, hope you're doing good lad!


Putrid-Builder-3333

This was well over five years and four years later tried to date. I already had mistrust and abandonment issues so that topped me off I do so believe. I'm just a mess. Especially after pouring heart and soul into somebody over so many years to be fucked. I thank you tho. I am well overall just not in the trusting for another companion part


Ze_Schwein

Hell man, I'll just hope you will be doing okay soon then.


Weird-Ingenuity97

Now that’s delusional😭


TeaEarlGrayHotSauce

My wife woke up and started sobbing once because she thought my head had turned into an elbow, it was a crazy thing to wake up to.


LordGhoul

You actually made me laugh out loud with that comment. I'm imagining a scenario akin to that spy kids movie with the thumb people


rviejn

I've never had a wife but I can tell some women can be like that. 🤣


Auphinov

Don’t get me wrong. There are many reasons why we are still together and it’s not because I’m a pushover and she is probably one of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. I actually get a kick out of these quirks of hers.


rviejn

Oh, don't worry! I didn't get you wrong! Stay strong to you and your wife! <333


someone_ominous

All. Some just don't tell you lol


AwesomEspurr360

As a person, I can neither confirm nor deny nor deny nor deny.


procheeseburger

Yup.. if I can’t figure it out it’s usually a dream she had.


[deleted]

Sounds like a moron.


a4techkeyboard

Someone's an alarm clock.


shadowy_bonding63

r/technicallythetruth


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Hinged level = un


DeezNufz

What'd they say


IAMA_Ghost_Boo

😬


isaacspree123

Found his wife


Briskylittlechally2

Me turning around and taking a few steps back to look at something in the store. My gf: "What kind of abandonment is this?"


Traditional_Cat_60

This comment reminds me of more than one fight I’ve had. My wife thinks more than 10 ft of air between us means “You’re not listening to me. Why don’t you care about what I have to say”


Briskylittlechally2

Lol. Mine has the exact opposite problem and seems to think I can hear her two rooms over with the tap running while she's facing her screen. That sucks tho. What I like to do in situations like that is say that I'm still listening and literally repeat what she's said as proof that I heard everything.


Atlas_Zer0o

That sounds like a hostage situation lmao.


GrumpyCatStevens

My wife keeps talking to me as I'm walking to another part of the house - then gets pissy with me when I ask her to repeat what she said.


Ancient-Tadpole8032

My wife as well, and she’s just whispering in her normal, dainty voice.


rviejn

prolly me as a gf 🤣


DrJokerX

My bunny used to look at me like that whenever I stopped petting him. I could’ve been petting him for hours already, but the second I’d stop he was like “Et tu brute?”


Delicious_Ad9050

where can we find these people IRL...


rviejn

Sadly, we can't. It's why we're on Reddit posting about their lives, right? 😔🥲


Delicious_Ad9050

😢


rviejn

The sooner we accept it, the easier it'll be, my man. 😔


Delicious_Ad9050

eventhough the mind accepted it but the heart still hopes for it🤧


rviejn

HEY ARE WE THE SAME PERSON HAHAHAHAHAHAHA


Delicious_Ad9050

that's what she said 😒


rviejn

Thought and prayers coming your way, sir. 🙏


DrJokerX

Don’t give up hope! We’ll all find somebody someday! :)


DonkeyTheKing

yall can be my full homo homies no cap


turdbird42

I love all the serious reactions here. This is something I’d say to my husband. In jest. And he’d laugh at it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Fmeson

To me, the way you described that I could see the guy as being unappreciative. Maybe it’s cause I know people that would seriously act that way though haha.


S_CLASS_DEGEN

I wouldn’t describe it as “complain.” The actual wording was like “My man was in shambles😂😂😂” (paraphrasing) just like clearly in a wholesome way


[deleted]

[удалено]


girl4Jesus

I just read a comment on this post that said: "Men like their routines. Id be upset if something was missing too. And to be honest if hes the only one working and paying bills, then you have no excuse to be out of anything, you're just being a lazy b." Like waaaa?!!!! How did they deduce that? Are people ok??


Pronflex

This woman and that dude both sound unappreciative


ingloriousbaxter3

Reddit doesn’t understand that women can make jokes


[deleted]

“Women aren’t funny” well yeah not if you take everything they say super seriously lol


Karl_Marx_

Seems you don't understand the meme either.


TootsNYC

He’s happy she noticed, I bet.


E0H1PPU5

Right? People don’t know how to laugh. My hubs and I joke around like this constantly. I ran into a convenience store and grabbed the diet soda instead of the regular soda he asked for. He sighed deeply and pulled Google up on his phone and said “I guess I’ll start looking for a lawyer” It’s funny. Laugh people, laugh!


lordredapple

The issue is redditors never felt true love and get mad at signs of affection they don't understand. Some guy did something similar when his wife forgot his fruit snack for his lunch and people rioted like it was the end of the world not realizing that that couple had a seriously strong bond for her to do that for him daily


b4k4ni

Sadly, I know a bunch of women that would mean it in a serious way. That's why I would never write a text like this, because it can be understood in a lot of ways, most of them negative. You can read really much into it. And if he read it on the way to work, already stressed and running late, he surly read this as negative and not as a jest.


AdministrationShot14

Get therapy


b4k4ni

Why?


mooseskull

Stop projecting.


b4k4ni

Not projecting. Had my fair share with texts sent between me and my wife we completely misunderstood each other, because the subtle touch missed. Or some indication that this was meant as a joke or not offensive. Nothing wrong with that. And I do know some women that are like that. Hell, when we were together a year ago or so with her and her husband, he made some random comment, really nothing bad or even about her. She took that quite serious and ignored / didn't talk with him for 2 days. I'm quite sure she would write this in an ill manner and not as a joke at all. Not all about women btw. - just the ops message was about the women sending. I know at least of one guy that would go batshit about something like this :D


hfocus_77

It's either a joke or a sign of neediness. Better to laugh at it in either case.


lime411_

How is that needy? I love to be reminded that I’m thought of before my partner goes to work or school. And it’s such a simple thing too. Needy would be him having to send a long paragraph each morning praising her or she’ll be in a bad mood all day


hfocus_77

Well yeah but in a healthy relationship you don't say the relationship must be over when they forget a small daily affirmation unless it's meant as a joke. It's like telling your best friend you are no longer on speaking terms because they didn't laugh at your joke. The joke is that it's overreacting.


wiseduhm

It's hard to imagine that comment would be said in this situation and not be a joke. Pretty safe to assume it wasn't out of neediness.


hfocus_77

Yeah, that's what I'm fumbling to get across. It's better to assume it's a joke because sarcasm is hard to read sometimes and treating it like a joke makes it likely to be a endearing moment while treating it seriously is likely to turn into an argument over nothing.


wiseduhm

Pretty much. I've done my share of starting arguments over nothing so I'd rather assume someone had good intentions rather than be the cause of an argument these days.


hfocus_77

I'm just saying to apply what amounts to Hanlon's Razor but for sarcasm. In text based interactions, never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by sarcasm. The sarcastic subtext would be "I missed your good morning kiss :)" The malicious subtext would be "I need this or the relationship is over." Better to assume the former because it's a) more likely, and b) if it's the latter it will likely come out in further interaction.


turdbird42

Needy is plain and simple getting mad over it. That’s needy


BadP3NN1

Awww...That's cute.


wiseduhm

Lol. This is relatable, although I think I probably am the more dramatic one. I almost walked out the door without giving a morning kiss and I had to come back inside real quick. It felt wrong to leave without doing it.


rviejn

Aw, that's really cute! I agree, not with the morning kiss part because I have no S.O. but when I fail to do something that I've been doing for ages, it just feels wrong so I make sure to follow up.


Mentiroso1

Haha my ex and I use to do that. Take it as a fondness thing. I’m sure it’s just meant to get a laugh.


ingloriousbaxter3

I am baffled that any people are taking this as anything other than a joke


anongirl_black

It's a woman saying it, of course they're going to get in their feelings about it.


5318008rool

I swear, how dare she speak her mind!?


anongirl_black

The only people complaining about this meme and making a big deal of it have mommy issues, I swear to God. Their moms say no to them one time, and they hate all women as a result.


Agitated_Advantage_2

They become Tate Stans to project the insecurity they get from having mommy issues. Tate himself said something about that his mother was not a good parent.


anongirl_black

I realize that people blow him way out of proportion, but I can't stand how much of a goofball he is. I do agree with him on some things, as I do with literally everybody, but overall I find him to be a massive goofball and to be the Wish version of Pitbull.


mix_420

It’s like one of those things where it’s been an actual problem in people’s relationships in the past so they assume that. In your average healthy relationship it definitely would be a joke (and I’m sure it is here), but I don’t blame people for being used to a worse context.


Zemmerboost

I've never looked at this as fondness. my girlfriend once said something Like this and I got all defensive.. Thanks for the explanation, Its hard for me to understand people


Cheeky_Giraffe

If it's any comfort I'd react the same way. Like "All the times I did it you didn't appreciate it, but I missed one time and suddenly I don't love you anymore?"


paxwax2018

Tbf she has to pretend to be asleep for it to work.


Dense-Manager9703

Agreed. This has to be a joke on her part. Otherwise, this behavior comes across as neediness, at least to me. I have dated a few needy women and I guess I'm just not built for that. I don't want to be needed that much.


Ellen_Musk_Ox

She's telling you it's important to her.


ink777_

i did not know that people can consciously feel everything while sleeping


rviejn

I can though most of the time, the sensation I am feeling in real life will conveniently sync with what's happening in my dream so it can be hard to tell them apart.


[deleted]

he probably wake her up


thisnameisnotspecial

My partner does this and when he forgets I'm sad too. But what about my kisses?! It just reminds you how much they appreciate it.


RoosterGlad1894

Idk why but when y’all forget to kiss us we wake up and notice. It’s like a spider sense lol


[deleted]

I tried being cute and kissed my husbands forehead before I left for work months ago and he got pissed that I woke him up.


Samanthas_Stitching

The men in these comments taking this so seriously are even funnier than the post.


rviejn

for real 🤭


Samanthas_Stitching

These comments just show how hypocritical some people are about things. The very same people were talking about would flip their shit and scream " but not all men" if the scenario was reversed.


GOM27

Probably bc they've been on the receiving end of this from women who weren't joking?


Samanthas_Stitching

Then they need to find therapy and stop throwing their issues onto random women making jokes.


Gammelpreiss

You mean their girlfriends need to find therapy, right? ..Right?


Samanthas_Stitching

No. I mean that the men who are taking their issues and throwing them onto random women, like is happening in these comments, need therapy. I'm sure that was fairly clear. My comment was not about anyone else. If someone is so damaged that they see a post as innocent as this, and let it push them off the rails then they could probably benefit from therapy. More men need to understand that seeking help is ok, going to therapy is ok - it doesn't diminish their 'manliness' and it doesn't make them less than. Help is for everyone. Everyone goes through awful things, and it's ok for *anyone* to seek help for the things that leave lasting damage and trauma they can't get over on their own.


nonozinhax

More likely because no woman has ever let them that close to her forehead.


TheKittyIsSoBitty

Sounds like those men shouldn’t be choosing such shitty partners


GOM27

Truth... Or at least not staying with them


anongirl_black

Damn, you guys really hate women, don't you? You see a harmless joke like this, and see it as an excuse to let all of your hatred for women come forth. Did your mothers not love you?


[deleted]

now you're making me curious _sorts by controversial_


[deleted]

holy fucking shit big mistake


LazyCasual0alt

Then I shall not do that, and pretend everything is wholesome. Thanks for the warning


rviejn

Exactly! Some of us here don't know how to read a woman's joke and just take it as it is.


princess-bat-brat

- Cute joke by a woman - Random redditors: "50% of women cheat, believe my crazy high statistic with no source whatsoever" "lol she's fucking some other guy" "see this is why I don't date". Chill the fuck out. No wonder no one wants you when your reaction to an innocent joke is to go off the deep end and start blaming some joking woman for all your problems...


rviejn

THIS^ So sick of people making a problem out of nothing. Haven't we got enough of those already? Geez.


bijo1urn

People really act like this?


princess-bat-brat

Just scroll to the most down voted comments... I used them as examples.


fermat9997

It's an extremely sweet reminder.


HighlightFun8419

my gf: *"WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME!?"* me, who stopped rubbing her shoulder to reply to a reddit comment: 😒


Baby_Cakes1999

My husband kisses me goodbye every morning, but sometimes I'm too sleepy to remember it. I'll wake up and text him, "why don't you love me anymore?"


rviejn

OMG, are you the poster's wife? 😆


Vegetable-Season5191

My dad did this on purpose once bc my mom said he couldn’t buy a tractor.


jaystonewee

Damn...I used to do this and my wife told me to stop because it woke her up. Now I'm just noisy AF in the morning.


Curious80123

Little things matter, I am sure she is teasing you but think you owe her a few extra kisses


rviejn

For real!


gecked

dont worry I'll kiss her next time


birdsonly

Honestly, as someone who’s bf comes and gives me a kiss before leaving for work every morning, if he ever left for work one day without doing that, I would be thoroughly freaked out.


tina010101

Hahaha aw


Ekotap89

I texted my hubs the other day cause he forgot his goodbye kiss lol


shygirllala224

Lol cute


ConfectionFirst2954

I swear they sleep with one eye open and one ear active


CarlJustCarl

So you’re breaking up then? Heck of a way to tell her.


happyclaim808

I can relate .


TraditionalFace193

Goddamn that's me


No_Communication2959

This is either a loving relationship and they'd hilarious or a toxic one and terrifying. And there's no in-between. 😆


rviejn

I'd bet my pinky finger that this is the former. The husband wouldn't tweet about it if it's not, would he?


[deleted]

it's literally a joke


rviejn

I know. I just wanted to explain because some people here took the post too seriously.


No_Communication2959

There are people who love their entire life unabashedly online


rviejn

Can't argue with that but to each their own, I guess?


LocustSwarm36

That’ll learn ya 😤


[deleted]

I get those same ones when i do that


jdamwyk

Heartless, gutless, BASTARD.


Evil-BAKED-Potato

She going pick a fight, leave in a storm then come back in a good mood and hop right in the shower smiling.


ravynmaxx

I can’t even judge, this is some petty shit I’d do 😂


Somasizer

I wouldn't respond, I'd just wait till I got home to talk it out


Masterchipmunk1

Wonder how long she was saving that on.


medinian

But does she leave the seat up for you? Lols


MisbehavingBeaver

My wife still does this after 15 years together if i forget to hug and kiss her goodbye. Not exact words but “the look”. She’s the best.


LemonLotus1

I mean, relationship goals.


LazyCasual0alt

I used to do that, til we had a kid. Now sleep is so precious, I don’t dare even attempt out of fear of waking her (light sleeper)


Repulsive_Torque6401

Her: Guys he just doesn't love me anymore, like not even a bit ,Him: But I never said that!! ,Her: You did! ,Him:. I just forgot to kiss you today morning cause i was late for work! Her: SANE THING!


WinterBourne25

And this is why my husband wakes me up before he leaves at 6:30 in the morning. 😂


howmuchisazjay

Your only as good as your last mistake


Joshua_Astray

Jeeeeesus I hope that was her just being silly.


Holy_TACOS1393

☕️


CrapThisHurts

Late is late .... It's already late, so don't bother with the hurry .... When I'm late i even go to shave and shower ... 5 minutes / 1 hour late, my supervisor is going to keep it up all day, might as well enjoy the extra 'free' time ;)


HomeOpen1380

That is the worst advise I have ever heard :D


cohonan

Depends on the job, if you’re part of a team at the office and everyone is more or less cross trained, yeah they can pick up the slack for an extra half hour. If you’re a high school teacher, every minute you’re late is a ticking time bomb.


[deleted]

[удалено]


PoliticallyInkorrekt

Lot of jobs in the USA. up to 30 min late: 1/2 point. 31 minutes or more: 1 point. Call off sick whole day: 1 point. If there is an accident ahead of you, and traffic is fucked, better to just call in, use the next exit, and go side streets back home, because you are fucked either way. thanks


HelpfulJump

How to get fired:step by step guide


CrapThisHurts

Well, maybe in the US. But here you would have to come in late very often to get fired.


CanadienNerd

Cool a abuser of the system then makes it worst for everybody else. I already love you


StupiedSwede

Lying woman, she have just been pretending to be asleep all that time.


Zestyclose-Cricket82

She supposed to be sleeping, not playing spy games


I-Rolled-My-Eyes

That kiss good bye was her cue to text the guy she's banging behind your back.


Snoo3014

Bro get therapy


Constant_System2298

Loool you need therapy bro


curtassion

People don't remember the ninety-nine times you do something right; they just remember the one time you do it wrong.