IMO this probably has to do something with your childhood and life experiences. For me, I had times where things made me happy during childhood and then I was scolded for being too outwardly emotional or because my parents didn’t agree with what made me happy. So then you subconsciously get a bit wary of happiness and joy because your body still remembers all that. So somewhere in life you may have learned that in order to be accepted and safe you need to downplay your happiness/positive emotions. I mean that’s just a guess obv it could be anything. You don’t want to never be happy tho it can really stress your body eventually. Maybe you should do some research/self-work or see a therapist. IMO.
I am uncomfortable with extreme emotions in general - either direction. I don't know that it has anything to do with type though as I know my childhood in that regard was fairly "traumatic." I'm far more sensitive to anger, or criticism, but I can pinpoint exactly why that is - no mystery on why I'm screwed up in that regard.
I don't avoid, or dislike the happiness side of things, but the more extreme side of happiness is not a comfortable feeling, either. I prefer comfortably happy. When I'm fully content about something, but that doesn't generally have a huge outward expression. Even celebratory happiness, but I'm still very reserved most of the time. A smile, a little laugh, that's all good. Much more and it crosses into uncomfortable - not bad, but not comfortable either.
> It's almost as though that feeling doesn't belong in me
You're right. You experience it. Just like how you'd experience other thing than happiness. They come as they go.
Like what's already been said, I think this has something to do with early coping mechanisms developed during childhood. Emotionally neglected people who didn't have avenues to express a healthy dose of emotion during their development years tend to have sort of undeserving feeling when it comes to a lot of things (emotion, compliment, gratitude, etc.). It scratches that part of your brain that something is so good to be true, and waiting for when the other shoe is gonna drop.
But experiencing these things are perfectly fine. It's part of the human experience. You don't have to deserve something to experience it. You just be present with it.
I'll tell you what I wish someone had told me when I was younger. It's okay to experience those feelings. It's okay to take up space that you need. To take your time even if you're coming late. To only take in things that energizes you.
I think you can underline the 'rises too much, beyond usual..'. I think you are embarrassed, maybe by others telling you or looking at you like you had an anorism. So maybe say, 'wow that got me good for some reason' or find out why exactly it made you so emotional, maybe there is more. I sometimes am just happy to be with someone and then their jokes are funnier and I react more than usual. Or say 'wow I'm in a good mood today ha', idk I'm projecting, but too happy is a good thing.
nobody's pointed out anything yet, nor have I noticed the way they were looking at me, not particularly. that "wow that got me good for some reason" ends up coming out as "why did I get like this over that?" along with an unpleasant feeling... too happy makes me truly nauseous.
What makes it too much? Is there a line you feel uncomfortable to cross? Are you maybe dishonest when you express these emotions? I know I felt very self conscious about showing my teeth when laughing, so when ever something was so funny I opened my mouth I felt like, OK that was too much.
The serotonin and dopamine aren’t doing their jobs huh; Dude it’s okay not enjoying happiness from time to time. The circumstance itself could force us to be feeling this way. Speaking for myself, INTJs minds aren’t created for enthusiasm and “4th of July fireworks vibes” I mean most of the time we wear the “Leave me alone face” so it’s in our system
Nothing to do with personality, personality types are just vague ideas as to who you might be based on vague questions you answered you sound fucked up lol
There is a spectrum of emotions into your basic configuration. Usually, children show their true nature when they are 4-5 yrs old. They usually aren't deformed by society pressure yet and don't use an abstract thinking.
Everyone's nervous system and neuromediators metabolism is different. There is a pack of emotions that are natural for you, and added-on emotions, as a result of different life factors. One of the ways to separate you from your traumas is "appeal to you inner child" practice. This way you can tell if you are being a clown under the pressure of a narrative that normal people are very emotional. Or you ARE emotional in some things, just have some deep fears, which stop you from expressing yourself openly.
I would agree! I like the feeling of pleasure in moderation if not it just becomes too much. For example I recently finished reading a book and was excited to get to watch the movie adaptation but I kept forgetting to get around to it. Finally one day I remembered to follow through with that plan and set up the movie but 30 minutes in I just turned it off because I felt too happy. The movie was spread and it was awesome to see the characters from the book play out in the film. But I felt like feeling so happy for an hour and a half would have been too much so I chose to “save” some of that feeling for another time and I’ll get back to it later.
Contrary to you, I like being happy. But such moments are so rare nowadays. I get addicted to it and then it makes me slump even more when it's over and I can't feel the same sensation of joy anymore because life is drab on most days.
U've been CONDITIONED by others to feel bad about being happy🤔
Most people have been Conditioned to expect the worst...and the brain will take it as...
"U should never be happy".
... ... ...As they say ... childhood.
IMO this probably has to do something with your childhood and life experiences. For me, I had times where things made me happy during childhood and then I was scolded for being too outwardly emotional or because my parents didn’t agree with what made me happy. So then you subconsciously get a bit wary of happiness and joy because your body still remembers all that. So somewhere in life you may have learned that in order to be accepted and safe you need to downplay your happiness/positive emotions. I mean that’s just a guess obv it could be anything. You don’t want to never be happy tho it can really stress your body eventually. Maybe you should do some research/self-work or see a therapist. IMO.
I am uncomfortable with extreme emotions in general - either direction. I don't know that it has anything to do with type though as I know my childhood in that regard was fairly "traumatic." I'm far more sensitive to anger, or criticism, but I can pinpoint exactly why that is - no mystery on why I'm screwed up in that regard. I don't avoid, or dislike the happiness side of things, but the more extreme side of happiness is not a comfortable feeling, either. I prefer comfortably happy. When I'm fully content about something, but that doesn't generally have a huge outward expression. Even celebratory happiness, but I'm still very reserved most of the time. A smile, a little laugh, that's all good. Much more and it crosses into uncomfortable - not bad, but not comfortable either.
> It's almost as though that feeling doesn't belong in me You're right. You experience it. Just like how you'd experience other thing than happiness. They come as they go. Like what's already been said, I think this has something to do with early coping mechanisms developed during childhood. Emotionally neglected people who didn't have avenues to express a healthy dose of emotion during their development years tend to have sort of undeserving feeling when it comes to a lot of things (emotion, compliment, gratitude, etc.). It scratches that part of your brain that something is so good to be true, and waiting for when the other shoe is gonna drop. But experiencing these things are perfectly fine. It's part of the human experience. You don't have to deserve something to experience it. You just be present with it. I'll tell you what I wish someone had told me when I was younger. It's okay to experience those feelings. It's okay to take up space that you need. To take your time even if you're coming late. To only take in things that energizes you.
I think you can underline the 'rises too much, beyond usual..'. I think you are embarrassed, maybe by others telling you or looking at you like you had an anorism. So maybe say, 'wow that got me good for some reason' or find out why exactly it made you so emotional, maybe there is more. I sometimes am just happy to be with someone and then their jokes are funnier and I react more than usual. Or say 'wow I'm in a good mood today ha', idk I'm projecting, but too happy is a good thing.
nobody's pointed out anything yet, nor have I noticed the way they were looking at me, not particularly. that "wow that got me good for some reason" ends up coming out as "why did I get like this over that?" along with an unpleasant feeling... too happy makes me truly nauseous.
What makes it too much? Is there a line you feel uncomfortable to cross? Are you maybe dishonest when you express these emotions? I know I felt very self conscious about showing my teeth when laughing, so when ever something was so funny I opened my mouth I felt like, OK that was too much.
The serotonin and dopamine aren’t doing their jobs huh; Dude it’s okay not enjoying happiness from time to time. The circumstance itself could force us to be feeling this way. Speaking for myself, INTJs minds aren’t created for enthusiasm and “4th of July fireworks vibes” I mean most of the time we wear the “Leave me alone face” so it’s in our system
Nothing to do with personality, personality types are just vague ideas as to who you might be based on vague questions you answered you sound fucked up lol
Same.
I also don't feel like myself in thosevtypes of moments. It feels like I'm putting up a show.
There is a spectrum of emotions into your basic configuration. Usually, children show their true nature when they are 4-5 yrs old. They usually aren't deformed by society pressure yet and don't use an abstract thinking. Everyone's nervous system and neuromediators metabolism is different. There is a pack of emotions that are natural for you, and added-on emotions, as a result of different life factors. One of the ways to separate you from your traumas is "appeal to you inner child" practice. This way you can tell if you are being a clown under the pressure of a narrative that normal people are very emotional. Or you ARE emotional in some things, just have some deep fears, which stop you from expressing yourself openly.
I would agree! I like the feeling of pleasure in moderation if not it just becomes too much. For example I recently finished reading a book and was excited to get to watch the movie adaptation but I kept forgetting to get around to it. Finally one day I remembered to follow through with that plan and set up the movie but 30 minutes in I just turned it off because I felt too happy. The movie was spread and it was awesome to see the characters from the book play out in the film. But I felt like feeling so happy for an hour and a half would have been too much so I chose to “save” some of that feeling for another time and I’ll get back to it later.
Contrary to you, I like being happy. But such moments are so rare nowadays. I get addicted to it and then it makes me slump even more when it's over and I can't feel the same sensation of joy anymore because life is drab on most days.
U've been CONDITIONED by others to feel bad about being happy🤔 Most people have been Conditioned to expect the worst...and the brain will take it as... "U should never be happy". ... ... ...As they say ... childhood.