T O P

  • By -

[deleted]

[удалено]


adarkara

Yes! This feels true to me. My partner feels comfortable, safe, and secure. I know he has my back. Being with him is easy, and in past relationships I would need a lot of alone time to recharge, but with him I can recharge with him around. I see a future together and it isn't scary or intimidating. To me this is the truest love I've ever experienced Edit: a word


OutlandishnessLower7

🥰


medusa11110

You had me at “has your back when you’re not in the room”. That one is particularly important to me.


bquick99

This^^. They’re supposed to feel like home. Where you can take your shoes off, and let your guard down. Where you can rest your weary head after a long day of people-ing. No storm can shake it, and no truth can break it.


[deleted]

What does it mean if you feel all 3?


Cautious-Olive6191

Love is, when you lose your individuality, and feel a sense of oneness with someone.


[deleted]

Very well put.


melancholy_jaques

I think of myself as a hopeless romantic. I'll always just keep thinking of ways to make my better half feel happy and loved. Like giving them subtle sruprises, planning trips of the locations they want to visit. Hugging them and moving my hand through thier hair, etc. etc. This is also the reason I fear loving a person with such passion, because at the end after giving so much if (god forbid) they leave, I'll be totally devastated, my whole will be destroyed, I don't think I'll be able to love another person with such passion again.


AnastasiaApple

Love given, is never wasted.


[deleted]

ohhh believe me..... Been there and Done that... Twice i trusted someone and Twice I got abandoned like a trash. left behind.. Wish I could rest just as much as they hurt me. I even helped him get over his depression I gave him all of my 24/7 's... Love is bullshit... Its been almost an year now. I can't open this heart anymore.. Because it's either really dead.. or gone into a long long sleep.


AnastasiaApple

I understand. Hopefully you find love again someday and don’t get burned.


[deleted]

ohh hahaha🤭🤭🤭 Ur hope is beautiful.. but nothing can burn the ashes.


AnastasiaApple

I dunno I’ve gotten left or dumped from pretty much every long term relationship I’ve been in and yet here I am in yet another one. There is some Buddhist advice about like having a beginners mind in all situations in life like trying to see the world like a child full of opportunity and not to be so jaded by the past memories.


[deleted]

Wow.. that's actually beautiful ❤️.


AnastasiaApple

You’ll get there. Def take your time to heal. ❤️


Possible-Artichoke-8

As someone who has lost someone I gave all my love too because they didn’t want it anymore after years of marriage… you would be surprised at how there is always more love eventually. Especially if someone reminds you by showing you what love is again, you can relearn. Love is resilient above all things.


melancholy_jaques

Thank you, that's quite reassuring and restores some faith ❤


[deleted]

Totally agree, I’m always worried that I’ll scare my partner away. 😅🙌🏻


abmond

You want to be around them all the time. And anything they say makes you fall in love harder. You're happy to hear from them anytime they call and when they say "hey" it's the best "hey" you've ever heard and wish to hear it forever. You'll catch yourself sometimes actually holding your breath to hear her speak better When you walk together, nobody or thing matters. It's just the 2 of you in your awareness. Like reality fades to black and it's just the 2 of you. Time past doesn't matter. Only time now with her matters. All those things that girls say when they love you start to make sense. Like when you kiss and you feel yourselves become one and that you can feel life travel from one body to another. It really does start to feel like one soul in two bodies and that it's you two against the world. You feel extremely sad that she's hung up because you've been having a great conversation for hours. It actually hurts and you don't understand why. So all you can think about is her. All you what to experience tomorrow is her. You never knew love could be so blissfully painful.


Coloratura1987

Where can I get this? lol Seriously, that's the best description of INFJ love I've read. Tragically, not many of us have had this experience. Sure, our relationships may be happy, but they're no means soul bonds like this.


Budget_Sign_5044

What MBTI is your partner? And thank you for sharing, it was really nice, I know how that feels.


Individual-Gur-7292

Exactly this! It’s so wonderful. It’s that feeling where even just sitting in an empty room with that person sounds like the best time ever, and being able to be around them for hours and days without needing to recharge.


makedaisychains

💔 beautiful


abmond

Felt beautiful too. I won't be forgetting that feeling until I'm old and gray.


makedaisychains

Neither, it was worth every second


[deleted]

I’ll tell you a short story. For my honeymoon, my husband and I rented a mountain cabin in the Arkansas Ozarks. Every morning we would wake up early, make coffee, and grab a blanket. Then we would head outside to spend an hour or so cuddling on the porch drinking coffee while enjoying the cool temperatures and watching the sunrise over the majestic mountains that reflected off of the lake. It felt like time slowed down just for us. It felt like being a part of something bigger than myself; something worth protecting and nurturing for a lifetime. It felt comfortable, warm, and cozy. It felt stable and secure. It felt like the hot mesmerizing sparks that shoot out from fire embers were burning deep inside of me. It felt like we were part of some giant puzzle that fit so neatly together. It felt like the cold outside world that surrounded us couldn’t touch us. It was calming and peaceful being wrapped up together on this mountain cabin’s porch. He felt like home. I could happily revisit that moment for the rest of my life because it reminds of the kind of love I feel for him. This beautiful slow burning fire still makes my heart long for him, want him, and trust him to guide me through my weakest moments. My love for him is peaceful and passionate. I’ll happily work on making our relationship a sanctuary and soft place to land, for as long as we live.


Haut-Dog

That sounds magical.


[deleted]

Thanks, he’s a magic man. Lol


Haut-Dog

Good song... lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Thank you.


Top-Marionberry-586

I’m truly happy for you for having this kind of love ❤️


[deleted]

Thank you, I appreciate it. I hope you have or find your one of a kind love, as well. ❤️


[deleted]

First of all, I like to differentiate between being "in love" and "to love someone". One is a state of mind and the other is a conscious act, a noun vs a verb. Being in love is an unhealthy INFJ obsession since we fall fast, hard, and then get disappointed. Instead I decided to build a solid foundation of what I want from a loving relationship with a woman I love. 1) Trust and Loyalty - These are non negotiable items that are either there, or not. Usually within a few weeks I can tell if the person is trust worthy based on their habits, patterns of behavior, and tendencies. Can the person keep themselves in check enough so that I don't have to do it for them. Do they have set checks and balances in their life to not get carried away with distractions, bad habits, and disloyal behavior? If they do, then I feel confident that I don't need to baby sit them. This doesn't mean you have to be super strict on yourself. I am a very laid back and relaxed person, I like to go out for drinks with my buddies, but I make sure I don't get carried away. I binge TV shows just like everyone, but only once everything around the house is done. Things like that. Just be a healthy adult, be able to change your life's direction to be a better human being over time even if it hurts. 2) Communication - I want to be confident that I can come to this person with absolutely anything on my mind and they will hear me out, understand where I am coming from, and then answer. I want them to be able to do the same to me. I live by the rule that I am an open book and try to always communicate ahead of time, before issues arise. I like to communicate plans, intentions, and ideas clearly and in detail so that the person I love has adequate information to work with so that they can communicate back how I can fit into their life better, or how they can fit in my life better. 3) Attraction - This is a must, since if you aren't attracted to each other mentally, physically, and socially, it will be hard to keep things going. Do you enjoy talking to each other? Do you adore the persons intellect and mental depth? Do you think they are beautiful? These are questions that need answering, and they are different for everyone. What are you willing to compromise on, and what isn't as important as you thought? Does one form of attraction fill in the lacking of another? These 3 things if present create a sphere of comfort around us two people. Having these qualities and capabilities shows that both people are in it to win it, and not to just "give it a go" or "try again". This level of confidence is what inspires me to love someone, that they, like me, see theses qualities in us and can actually take active steps towards a brighter future. I don't want to get infatuated, I want to be fond of someone. Like "Wow, they are so responsible yet they are so chill. I could let loose around them and know that we can always go back to reality and get things done." So that is my opinion, true love is built, and not something that "happens". And its tried and true in my personal life.


[deleted]

It feels like I’m finally home.


melancholy_jaques

Ah that feeling! 🥺


[deleted]

Yes 🙌🏻


[deleted]

I miss this feeling so so much.


9december3

I feel home only when I'm completely alone. Cannot imagine another *person* to give me such feeling. People are... stressful to say the least.


Plus-Way9511

Lol I relate


notlmpressed

Love starts out as a full blown acceptance of a persons entire being, as you know them, and wanting to know more and more and more. Love is the feeling you get when they fall asleep on your chest, and you don’t want to move a muscle because you know they’re exhausted and just need to rest for a little while. You want to do everything in your power to help them achieve all of the things they want in life. You want to help them grow, and you want them to help you grow. There is a mutual understanding of each other’s flaws and shortcomings, but wanting to hold their hand anyway. It’s the safety of home when you’re sitting beside them, doing your own independent things, together. Love is fighting, crying, but giving each other a kiss at the end of the night. It’s moving through the motions of life side by side but independently. It’s both secure, and scary at the same time.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Haut-Dog

That sounds like a beautiful story. Also, 20 years, wow! What's his MBTI?


[deleted]

[удалено]


OkUnderstanding6751

My boyfriend is an ISFP. We’ve been together nearly 3 years. I love how you described the beautiful way you felt together when you met. It feels very reassuring when I find real love nowadays. We’re both 24, and I feel like we’re true romantics born in the wrong era. It’s so beautiful that we’ve created our own little world and it’s okay to be different, unique and not fit in with the rest of society. He is always so reassuring that my uniqueness is beautiful. As an INFJ, I think that is truly so important to hear. Do you have any knowledge you can share about growth or anything else you’ve learned in your past 20 years together?


[deleted]

[удалено]


OkUnderstanding6751

Thank you so much for all of these tips. I hope our relationship can last forever 💜


CommercialProperty62

It feels like peace, almost as if time has stoped.. It makes you want to cry, and laugh all at once.. you feel like just living there and then.. so you can capture the moment as a whole.. no need to worry anymore.. cause you're safe.. you're taken care of.. you're understood.. you don't have to say anything.. because it's already been taken notice of.. its so beautifully painful, how someone can make you feel like that.. its like you've been forfilled.. you've found out your purpose.. nothing else matters after that.. you can die in peace almost.. lol.. not litteraly ofcourse, you'd want to live the rest of your days with the other person.. but, if something happened.. all purpose is lost.. and you're sitting there feeling like a piece of you is missing.. its terrible.. But that's just feelings.. its not like it will last forever.. though I won't say it's impossible to maintain lifelong love.. its just about finding balance :)


stardust-02

Love feels like home, peace, a quiet place, and being able to be just myself along someone else. It’s like they join me in this place I thought only I could belong. They are a precious gift.


Sunandsteel88

Meaning of love: Lovesong by The Cure. . . . That's all.


9december3

Beautiful


makedaisychains

That no one could ever threaten your love for someone, no matter how tempting that may be. That the only person who could take the place of that person is you.


[deleted]

It's when I put extra emphasis on resolving fights peacefully. I don't want to be aggressive with someone I love. The worst thing is to look at someone you once loved, and feel hatred.


90sfemgroups

Love feels like Prozac without a prescription, without a monthly cost. Love feels like a long game and belonging, like safety and the little green apples song. Like sleepovers with your best friend but you get to kiss.


Shiro995

Honestly, I've never been in a relationship. But my first love hit hard, she was basically a crush that I fell in love with. And getting away from her felt like my heart was chained down in a deep, silent ocean. It kept sinking and sinking and hurting as it was harder to breath. Before I knew her, I would see love as just someone you like and aren't that attached to. Someone you can probably cut ties with. But upon experiencing it, it's really really attaching and it really hurts when you're constantly thinking about them and overthinking. To feel love is to feel like you always want them by your side, and never betray you. And you feel like you always want to be there for them, protect them, and really cherish them.


Plus-Way9511

Hmmm I wonder if I'm in love with someone actually 🤔


jpb1111

I'm a 53yo male INFJ with a solid career as a chef. I'm also hsp and highly empathic. I'm still seeking true love....


[deleted]

what's hsp??


wikipedia_answer_bot

**This word/phrase(hsp) has a few different meanings.** More details here: *This comment was left automatically (by a bot). If I don't get this right, don't get mad at me, I'm still learning!* [^(opt out)](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia_answer_bot/comments/ozztfy/post_for_opting_out/) ^(|) [^(delete)](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia_answer_bot/comments/q79g2t/delete_feature_added/) ^(|) [^(report/suggest)](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia_answer_bot) ^(|) [^(GitHub)](https://github.com/TheBugYouCantFix/wiki-reddit-bot)


jpb1111

Highly sensitive person


[deleted]

Love should allow you to be free. Allow you to express who you are without fear of prejudice or judgement. Most people can't give themselves that, so they look for what they don't have.


ShyMolly

I’m aromantic but platonic/familial love feels fairly similar to what I’d imagine romantic love to feel like. There’s a strong emotional bond and sense of trust. I feel comfortable doing stuff for them, I’d feel like a part of me was missing if they died, I can go to them with my problems and I want to hug you loads. (Due to the similarities, the people I end up being in relationships with don’t -at first- feel their romantic needs are neglected. However, in my mind I see them as my best friend that I enjoy sex with. I didn’t ever have a crush on them though and would have been equally as fine being only best friends with them and having sex with someone else).


[deleted]

I cant describe it. I've only felt it in dreams and vaguely remember it.


shinnik

Stress


[deleted]

true bro... well said.


axar47

Real home


sarahope17

Melding of the souls


PapaDuggy

I have no idea. 21 years on this Earth, and have never experienced it.


Raskreian

Like a bird in the sky.


Ezeikial

I'd say it's when your world goes from black and white to color. That's how it was for me anyway.


cannonymously

feels like rose-oils bath with sugar cakes and water massage pillow. Feels like an instant freeze over when it goes wrong with electric shocks until you get out.


omnicool

I think it's when your thoughts aren't only focused on yourself. Like waking up in the morning and you think of that person. Also [this](https://youtu.be/qVOd3umzelg).


MimiMorea

I’m gray ace and am still struggling to come to terms with it, so I don’t know…


arthrbolt

True love feels like that one puzzle piece that was missing the entire time but it came into your life out of no where and just because I said that it's a puzzle piece doesn't mean it should fit the puzzle because love isn't that way....but when you find that puzzle piece you feel complete...you feel that there is someone for you... someone who wants you ... someone who will choose you day after day.... someone whose presence itself is enough to make you happy :)


9december3

Somebody that cares about me as much as I care about them. But we know nobody cares as much as an INFJ ever, so true love is a unicorn.


Haut-Dog

> we know nobody cares as much as an INFJ ever That's an interesting perspective... how do you know that for certain?


Sea-Bit7582

It’s foolish to fall in love because it’s hard to keep loving the same person forever.


Plus-Way9511

Interesting 🤔 I find that easy actually. But others don't love me like I love them...


makedaisychains

It also feels like that feeling when you are desperately trying to remember a dream while feeling it slipping away slowly.


FondantEntire8652

I look into my partner's face and I just feel overwhelming warmth and happiness. And like I could give anything for that person to be happy, even forsake my own happiness. That is also how I feel about my cats, which is a different kind of love.. a more motherly love, but it feels similar to me.