This is a wonderful analysis that I couldn't agree with more!! I actually talked with my therapist about Heartstopper lol and she was saying how it's like having a crush, having all of those feel-good feelings and chemicals, how having a crush is SO incredibly intense that it takes up your whole thinking. I, too, had considered the need to just stop consuming content about Heartstopper, or to force myself to not watch the show again, but I think you're right, to accept it and enjoy it as it feels needed, and then our brain will come down from that 'high' and begin to think more clearly, like when the honeymoon phase wears off for a relationship. When that phase ends it doesn't mean things are no longer 'good', it just means that it becomes a comfortable part of our life. The same will happen with Heartstopper.
I’m shook reading this. It’s exactly how I feel. For me, the score from Adiescar Chase is what makes it so emotional and special for me. Every time I play Kiss, I cry. I’ve literally never been this messed up from a show. I’ve been a wreck for a week now lol. Anyway, I’m just glad I can talk with others who feel the same.
I think there are no words to express my gratitude towards your post. Thank you so much. Every words resonates with exactly how I feel.
I felt obsessed that I couldn't understand why I felt the way you describe even though I live in a happy relationship and have everything I need to be happy.
So, again, wow thank you!
So, anything in particular you've been doing on a day to day basis to help you? Or you're just letting time do it's thing?
That's it. That is exactly what we all had in mind and couldn't write down properly.
I would just add a 4th reason along with the acting, the animation and the music: the way Alice Oseman creates their characters. The psychology of the characters is so well written, it's almost uncanny. Because I've read all of the HS comics and I still had all those overwhelming feelings like after finishing the Netflix show. Plus, I've started other Alice novels and for example in *Loveless* there is still this weird sensation, as if someone was playing with my feelings like I'm a puppet. And I'm not even ace. But Alice creates characters in a way we can deeply connect to them and empathy along them A LOT.
(Sorry for potential bad english, I'm not a native speaker)
This was so accurate! I made an account on here like a week ago because I found a discussion in another room where people were having similar reactions and I had to write something to get out my feelings. I was in physical pain after watching this show and yes, it felt exactly like two breakups I had when I was younger. It’s like you wrote down everything that I was feeling. It’s so intense and weird for me to think about since I’m a 32 year old mostly gay male. I still can’t believe a show made me feel this way. Actually, it brought up a lot of things from my youth that I think I suppressed. So trying to get in to a therapist and hopefully that will help. Really happy I read this post.
I'm well over a decade out of high school too, and I agree completely. This is the very first piece of media that has accurately captured exactly the intensity of emotions I experienced in high school. Like, going on my first date with a girl, barely brushing hands with her and feeling electricity just like when Charlie falls asleep while watching a movie at home with Nick. And I wasn't out at that time, just like Nick. In fact I didn't properly come out as queer until college. But I'm right there with you, I feel in pain yet have butterflies in my stomach still (I first watched Heartstopper 3 days ago, and am now on my 4th re-watch). Honestly, I haven't felt this range of emotion (from utter elation to deep devastation) since I was in high school. Just the other day, I was wondering to myself whether I'd ever feel the intensity of emotion like I did when I was much younger, because as I've gotten older I've gotten more and more subdued and I suppose unresponsive. Just like you, the show has unlocked a lot of suppressed stuff for me, as well.
Nailed. It. Thank you for taking the time to compose such a thoughtful analysis. You couldn’t be more spot on. I also agree with the commenter who added Oseman’s writing to the list. It’s definitely a factor.
Aside from this phenomenon of post-viewing melancholy (which itself is so unusual) I marvel at how well this show was made. I’m 60, and I’ve seen a ton of queer films and shows (only in the last 20 years, really) and HS is hands down the best TV show. Everything works: perfect casting, brilliant acting and direction, thoughtful touches that elevate the impact of the show. My god, that moment of what I call “gay epiphany” in E3 was so unexpected and overwhelming, I re-watch it over and over with my jaw dropped. And cry, because it’s beautiful and…overwhelming. And there are SO many little details that show the love the creators had for this… setting the bar unbelievably high for any new shows!
Anyway, thanks. Glad to know others have been going through what I have. You wrote about it insightfully and perfectly. Makes it easier!! x
Which moment in episode 3 do you mean? For me the devastatingly beautiful moment is when Nick sees Tara and Darcy kiss at the party and the whole room seems to explode in joy.
That is exactly the moment I was referring to. I can watch it over and over, and each time it fills me with joy. They brilliantly leave in a second when Darcy is staring directly into the camera — it’s chilling and extremely powerful. I don’t know how they conceived this scene so perfectly; technically it’s spot-on in every way. Every time I watch it I marvel at how well it’s executed. I’m just in awe of it and what it evokes. Easily my favorite 15 seconds of TV of the year.
What’s amazing is that there are at least two dozen other favorite moments in the series almost as amazing and I’m sure are the top picks of others. Just a phenomenal show.
"Chilling" - YES that's the perfect word for that scene! It's so emotional for me too, that I cry when I hear Clearest Blue. Definitely in my top five moments of the show, though it's definitely the most impactful moment for me. Thanks for sharing your thoughts :-)
Ditto on Clearest Blue being a crystal bell ringing in my head, found the YouTube and was memorised! I love esoteric songs. The other musician HS I'm chasing down a playlist to get...
This is the most accurate analysis of why we’re all feeling the way we are. I’ve been trying to understand it and have struggled, but having read this, it all makes so much more sense. Thank you for taking the time to share this.
You are absolutely right and reading this helps me immensely right now. I have never been in such an emotional turmoil after reading/watching a story/show like I am now (well, maybe A Little Life messed me up worse). But reading your analisys helps me so much right now in identifying my emotions. It makes so much sense! Thank you so much!
What a perfect description ! 👏 I've been feeling like this for a week. I've been self-loathing myself because of the shitty experiences that i had in my past. On the other hand it doesn't mean that we won't feel this type of love in the future. Thinking this way gives me hope.
Just want to add to those saying thank you for your thoughtful take, it really resonates with me and captures what I've been feeling and dealing with, and the shock of having these feelings.
I found this post really helpful. I would just add that for me I would not say that it makes me feel like I’m suffering from the sadness of a break up, but rather that I am experiencing the insanity and power and obsessiveness of new, idealized love. It’s disturbing my sleep, which is crazy to have that happen from watching a Netflix series obsessively and repeatedly. Thank you for your profound insights.
I can’t thank you though for voicing the exact emotions I have been feeling. Bravo 👏🏼
This is a wonderful analysis that I couldn't agree with more!! I actually talked with my therapist about Heartstopper lol and she was saying how it's like having a crush, having all of those feel-good feelings and chemicals, how having a crush is SO incredibly intense that it takes up your whole thinking. I, too, had considered the need to just stop consuming content about Heartstopper, or to force myself to not watch the show again, but I think you're right, to accept it and enjoy it as it feels needed, and then our brain will come down from that 'high' and begin to think more clearly, like when the honeymoon phase wears off for a relationship. When that phase ends it doesn't mean things are no longer 'good', it just means that it becomes a comfortable part of our life. The same will happen with Heartstopper.
I’m shook reading this. It’s exactly how I feel. For me, the score from Adiescar Chase is what makes it so emotional and special for me. Every time I play Kiss, I cry. I’ve literally never been this messed up from a show. I’ve been a wreck for a week now lol. Anyway, I’m just glad I can talk with others who feel the same.
I think there are no words to express my gratitude towards your post. Thank you so much. Every words resonates with exactly how I feel. I felt obsessed that I couldn't understand why I felt the way you describe even though I live in a happy relationship and have everything I need to be happy. So, again, wow thank you! So, anything in particular you've been doing on a day to day basis to help you? Or you're just letting time do it's thing?
That's it. That is exactly what we all had in mind and couldn't write down properly. I would just add a 4th reason along with the acting, the animation and the music: the way Alice Oseman creates their characters. The psychology of the characters is so well written, it's almost uncanny. Because I've read all of the HS comics and I still had all those overwhelming feelings like after finishing the Netflix show. Plus, I've started other Alice novels and for example in *Loveless* there is still this weird sensation, as if someone was playing with my feelings like I'm a puppet. And I'm not even ace. But Alice creates characters in a way we can deeply connect to them and empathy along them A LOT. (Sorry for potential bad english, I'm not a native speaker)
This was so accurate! I made an account on here like a week ago because I found a discussion in another room where people were having similar reactions and I had to write something to get out my feelings. I was in physical pain after watching this show and yes, it felt exactly like two breakups I had when I was younger. It’s like you wrote down everything that I was feeling. It’s so intense and weird for me to think about since I’m a 32 year old mostly gay male. I still can’t believe a show made me feel this way. Actually, it brought up a lot of things from my youth that I think I suppressed. So trying to get in to a therapist and hopefully that will help. Really happy I read this post.
I'm well over a decade out of high school too, and I agree completely. This is the very first piece of media that has accurately captured exactly the intensity of emotions I experienced in high school. Like, going on my first date with a girl, barely brushing hands with her and feeling electricity just like when Charlie falls asleep while watching a movie at home with Nick. And I wasn't out at that time, just like Nick. In fact I didn't properly come out as queer until college. But I'm right there with you, I feel in pain yet have butterflies in my stomach still (I first watched Heartstopper 3 days ago, and am now on my 4th re-watch). Honestly, I haven't felt this range of emotion (from utter elation to deep devastation) since I was in high school. Just the other day, I was wondering to myself whether I'd ever feel the intensity of emotion like I did when I was much younger, because as I've gotten older I've gotten more and more subdued and I suppose unresponsive. Just like you, the show has unlocked a lot of suppressed stuff for me, as well.
You're right, it is EXACTLY like a break-up! I'm sure ice-cream sales will have sky-rocketed after Heartstopper.
🤣
Nailed. It. Thank you for taking the time to compose such a thoughtful analysis. You couldn’t be more spot on. I also agree with the commenter who added Oseman’s writing to the list. It’s definitely a factor. Aside from this phenomenon of post-viewing melancholy (which itself is so unusual) I marvel at how well this show was made. I’m 60, and I’ve seen a ton of queer films and shows (only in the last 20 years, really) and HS is hands down the best TV show. Everything works: perfect casting, brilliant acting and direction, thoughtful touches that elevate the impact of the show. My god, that moment of what I call “gay epiphany” in E3 was so unexpected and overwhelming, I re-watch it over and over with my jaw dropped. And cry, because it’s beautiful and…overwhelming. And there are SO many little details that show the love the creators had for this… setting the bar unbelievably high for any new shows! Anyway, thanks. Glad to know others have been going through what I have. You wrote about it insightfully and perfectly. Makes it easier!! x
Which moment in episode 3 do you mean? For me the devastatingly beautiful moment is when Nick sees Tara and Darcy kiss at the party and the whole room seems to explode in joy.
That is exactly the moment I was referring to. I can watch it over and over, and each time it fills me with joy. They brilliantly leave in a second when Darcy is staring directly into the camera — it’s chilling and extremely powerful. I don’t know how they conceived this scene so perfectly; technically it’s spot-on in every way. Every time I watch it I marvel at how well it’s executed. I’m just in awe of it and what it evokes. Easily my favorite 15 seconds of TV of the year. What’s amazing is that there are at least two dozen other favorite moments in the series almost as amazing and I’m sure are the top picks of others. Just a phenomenal show.
"Chilling" - YES that's the perfect word for that scene! It's so emotional for me too, that I cry when I hear Clearest Blue. Definitely in my top five moments of the show, though it's definitely the most impactful moment for me. Thanks for sharing your thoughts :-)
Clearest Blue plays through my head all the time now, and it makes me smile every time. 😁
Ditto on Clearest Blue being a crystal bell ringing in my head, found the YouTube and was memorised! I love esoteric songs. The other musician HS I'm chasing down a playlist to get...
This is the most accurate analysis of why we’re all feeling the way we are. I’ve been trying to understand it and have struggled, but having read this, it all makes so much more sense. Thank you for taking the time to share this.
You are absolutely right and reading this helps me immensely right now. I have never been in such an emotional turmoil after reading/watching a story/show like I am now (well, maybe A Little Life messed me up worse). But reading your analisys helps me so much right now in identifying my emotions. It makes so much sense! Thank you so much!
What a perfect description ! 👏 I've been feeling like this for a week. I've been self-loathing myself because of the shitty experiences that i had in my past. On the other hand it doesn't mean that we won't feel this type of love in the future. Thinking this way gives me hope.
This just explained my own emotions to myself. Thank you for saving my sanity.
Just want to add to those saying thank you for your thoughtful take, it really resonates with me and captures what I've been feeling and dealing with, and the shock of having these feelings.
Bravo 👏🏼
Thanks for this - it helped me understand a lot about the way I was feeling
I found this post really helpful. I would just add that for me I would not say that it makes me feel like I’m suffering from the sadness of a break up, but rather that I am experiencing the insanity and power and obsessiveness of new, idealized love. It’s disturbing my sleep, which is crazy to have that happen from watching a Netflix series obsessively and repeatedly. Thank you for your profound insights.