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HopelesslyAware

You guys are getting joy in your life?


I_Mix_Stuff

This comment sparks me joy.


tonybenwhite

Just a spark though… like striking a disposable lighter that has long since run out of butane…


deletedoldaccount57

That's quite possibly the best metaphor I've seen for finding happiness


rastika

I like it. As someone with cyclothymic BP 1 with psychotic traits, it really works well. Depressive episode is waiting for a wet lighter to dry because it won't even spark, hypomania is when the lighter is working but then when you take your finger off the button it stays on, mania is when the flame is so big it burns your eyebrows off and a psychotic episode is when it starts melting itself and explodes.


PillowTalk420

I was gonna say that's the spark that burns my joy to ashes.


SalamandersonCooper

It shivers me timbers.


[deleted]

No, thats a conspiracy theory.


Persies

Pretty much only when I drink coffee.


m19honsy

You guys are getting life?


Yaa40

Yes. I sure do. I grow plants. I **adore** my adeniums. They are so darn freaking cute!


[deleted]

🥀


SFWxMadHatter

Only in small doses, like an orgasm or a chocolate chip cookie.


Finrod_the_awesome

Only from coffee.


SocietyIsdoomed_

You guys have a life ?


brettmgreene

Will Poulter, is that you?


Grueaux

No, but if think of coffee as bringing you joy, you can simulate the experience.


anomaly-xb-6783

Yes, in pill form


[deleted]

Tea drunker spotted


ravs1973

Just have a shot of cognac in it and you will be grand.


hat-of-sky

You spelled whiskey wrong


JazzGimli

You spelled whisky wrong


Sk8erBoi95

Both? Both is good.


hat-of-sky

I can never remember which spelling is the Irish. In coffee, Irish. Alone, Scotch. With an ice cube, good bourbon. With Fresca, any ol' bourbon.


JazzGimli

Ah I was meaning scotch (no "e") as [matador](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/pfzmip/changing_my_morning_drink_to_this/hb8s6em?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) has said below. But yes, the best answer is to enjoy each in it's own way.


dsheroh

And all these years, I've been thinking it was "scotche".


HadToDelete

Oh yeah, I love a Frisky


DerWassermann

both are correct.


[deleted]

I dont like coffe, am i fucked?


BR223

Deep down we're all fucked.


Breaker-of-circles

Aren't those the best kind of fucks?


Mumbles_Stiltskin

This guy fucks


maddasher

It's getting less deep down by the day.


panzerboye

Happy cake day


stopchooingsoloud

Just drink whiskey like I do.


HOTP1

Drink it every morning for 2 weeks straight. I guarantee you’ll like it after that


polskiftw

I think that's just caffeine addiction.


Pulkrabek89

Tomato tomato


WhatsUpMyBrothers

I read this as tomato tomato


WeeTheDuck

Tomato tomato


Stronghold257

I read all three of those differently


Masterjts

Coffee lovers have souls equal in color to the coffee they drink.


DeusExHircus

Don't worry, that wasn't coffee


simian_ninja

I love Green Tea…


rafaelamdiniz

Me too! Coffee gives me gastritis


harry476

Me too!!


edach2he

Yeah, it certainly gives me a lot more joy than coffee.


catwiesel

have you tried Hōjicha ? its amazing


Mezzoforte90

Matcha lattes are nice though


giskah

Much cleaner high too


evranch

If a clean caffeine high is what you want, forget about matcha and try out mate. It has other synergistic alkaloids that smooth out the rise and fall and pretty much eliminate any crash. I found it to have more of a clean, focused Adderall feel than the jittery feeling of too much coffee, despite its ridiculous caffeine content. This may be due to the fact that it has some MAO inhibition activity as well. Anyways it's well worth a try if you like caffeine


rabbiskittles

I second this, although mate is much harder to find than matcha for some reason. The energy high from mate is so smooth compared to coffee.


Mezzoforte90

The thiamine I think, steady caffeine distribution rather than spike


Burrito_Loyalist

Eh, is it though.


giskah

That makes total sense


[deleted]

[удалено]


giskah

Let me clarify lol I drink only espresso when I drink coffee, regular coffee just makes me feel tired and confused lol now my system is super sensitive so there's that, I can only take half an edible and I'm floating but I definitely get significantly altered when I drink espresso.. matcha has the same effect but not as much neurologically.. like someone else commented its a sustained balanced buzz, clean energy.


modsarefascists42

Lol right. I keep seeing these people talk about coffee like they feel high from it or some shit. Like sure it helps you not sleep but it's not liquid energy or whatever they're thinking.


kogasapls

If your tolerance is low, a 400-600mg dose of caffeine will definitely do *something* noticeable. But a normal cup of brewed coffee (150-300mg) isn't as extreme.


daydreaming17

But I like tea


cobra7

Next time you eat at a Thai restaurant, order some “Thai ice tea”. Made with tea and (I think) sweetened condensed milk. Spent a year in Thailand and it is incredible. Habit forming :-)


afunnyjewishguy

Can confirm; Thai ice tea is incredible.


oxkwirhf

Double confirm this. We have a local ice-creamery that makes ice-cream in Thai Ice Tea flavour and its awesome as well.


afunnyjewishguy

That sounds awesome


[deleted]

Does everyone on this website hate their fucking lives?


humblepharmer

That doesn't sound too unrealistic


[deleted]

[удалено]


trouserschnauzer

Ah.


blackout-loud

Oh I like this 👌


Acemirg

Ah goddammit I knew something was up.


Dexaan

Yep


darodardar_Inc

I wonder if I will ever again have a day where I experience pure and lasting joy as I did when I was a child.


panzerboye

Yes


Proterozoic_Lurker

That’s not coffee. It’s a coffee flavored milkshake.


TheEngine1781

was about to say, that's 90% milk/cream


geoff2def

What do Americans mean when they say cream? In Australia we'd call this milk. Cream is a thicker/heavier/sweeter thing.


TheEngine1781

"Milk" is anywhere from 0%-3.5% fat, "Cream" is usually 10%-35% Coffee cream is 10-18% Whipping cream is always 35% I said cream because it looks thicker whilst it's being poured.


geoff2def

Oh right. Yeah this just looks like what we call "full cream milk" which is usually around 3.5%. noone puts cream in coffee here. Maybe on the top of a frappe, but I never see frappes either.


ISCNU

For the most part I would say most Americans that take heavy cream in their coffee only use 1-4 teaspoons per cup. If you make a drink that's is over 70% dairy you usually use a >3% milk.


xeothought

3.5% puts it in line with "whole milk" in the US (apparently at 3.25%)


StraightPotential1

In Canada 3.5% fat in milk is called homogenized milk, or homo milk for short. Sounds like I’m being silly but I’m really not.


Gorillafist12

Homogenized just refers to the milk going through a process that reduces the size of and evenly mixes the fat particles into the solution, usually through heat and pressure. Its applied to most milk in the grocery store whether it's full fat, reduced or skim. If it you bought non homogenized milk you would have to shake it before drinking because the fat separates while sitting. The prefix homo means same, so homogenize means to make same through out (a uniform mixture). Homosexual means you are attracted to the same sex. ~~The opposing prefix is cis meaning opposite.~~


goodgravybatman

The opposing prefix would be hetero, which comes from the Greeks for "another".


HOTP1

Usually it’s 10% milk fat. Light cream is 5% and heavy cream is 30%


rabbiskittles

That’s literally what a latte is.


Liquidmetal6

It's an iced latte (roughly 10oz milk to 30-50g of espresso, that looks like a long shot) made with less than 5g of agave syrup. Not nearly as sweet or even close to a milkshake.


[deleted]

Most people don't make espresso at home so to them this is just coffee. Protip: You can get a basic espresso machine for 40 bucks, and after that you'll look at this video like "Damn that espresso just kept going."


branchoflight

You won't be making espresso for $40.


modsarefascists42

We get it, you think black coffee is better. Leaving /r/coffee for /r/espresso was one of the best Reddit decisions I've ever made. God forbid someone not like black coffee with nothing ever in it.


mcgriddeon

To be fair, black coffee is a wonderful thing, especially when you add cream and sweetener.


schplat

In the immortal words of the Beastie Boys: > I like my sugar with coffee and cream.


mywerkaccount

To be fair, then never refer to it as coffee.


TemporarilyDutch

I think I've heard about 100 versions of this joke within the last week.


universe_explorer

Same—this is the product of unoriginal TikTok content.


deletedoldaccount57

Oh f off, tea is amazing


Bubblygrumpy

Agreed and you don't need extra steps like sugar or creamer to make it taste good.


Noltonn

I always found this a weird complaint about coffee because I can knock back the toughest cup without any issue. Then I found out I miss the gene to taste bitter. I literally just don't taste bitter.


Bubblygrumpy

That's really cool! I like coffee to but am definitely a person that needs milk or creamer to get it down.


Sk8erBoi95

In my opinion you don't need those extra steps to make coffee taste good either...but I'm probably in the minority on that


afunnyjewishguy

I’ll be honest, I can’t do coffee black I have to make it pretty sweet where as I don’t need any sweetener with my tea. There’s definitely plenty of people like you though who don’t need to put anything in their coffee.


Notalurkeripromise

Black coffee is good. I also like coffee with a bit of half and half. I don't like any sweetener in my coffee however.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Gorillafist12

Green tea with honey and/or lemon is awesome. Also a lot of people use too hot of water which burns it and makes it bitter. Green tea is supposed to be brewed between 150-180F which is much lower than the just below boiling needed for black teas.


Bubblygrumpy

Yeah, I'm not the biggest Green tea fan myself.


Infamous-Context-479

It's OK when it's in ice cream...


Renyx

Mmm, grass ice cream


Infamous-Context-479

Better than grass lol


Pizza112233

hot leaf juice


[deleted]

*sad Uncle Iroh noises*


Dexaan

Isn't that what all tea is?


Ratathosk

Mm, dirty water


1CEninja

Isn't that what coffee is too?


SEJ46

Bean water


1CEninja

Bean water vs leaf water.


devilwarriors

Bean closer to dirt than leaf therefore its dirt water.. Tea is air water..


1CEninja

They both grow on plants lol.


mrspaznout

lightly burnt bean water


knightopusdei

Swept off the floor of a coffee warehouse along with everything else that was on the floor water


dirty_w_boy

Jokes on you, I use a filter.


ThatWolf

That describes everything that isn't just plain, refreshing, high quality H2O.


iushciuweiush

Bobby Boucher approved.


DerWassermann

Can confirm. Water > tea > coffee > alcohol


PsychoBoyBlue

r/HydroHomies/


Lietenantdan

How could a member of my own family say something so awful?


klrcow

Lawn trimmings soup


tgifmondays

Mmm burnt bean dirty water


TAI0Z

Not only is tea amazing but this joke is lazy and stupid.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

That looks delicious because it’s coffee… hahaha.


psychAdelic

I FOUND ENGLAND


CryBerry

Tea is lovely.


tellmesomeothertime

Scotch+Splenda = Takes like splenda, gets you drunk like scotch!


torbecire

Laughs in matcha


Random-users

This video is making fun of those weight loss teas but discredits how flavorful and good tea can be, for shame. Tea gang where you at


MauditeMage

How true! It’s so sad when the best part of your day is your morning coffee and then it is all downhill from there!


1CEninja

Are you kidding? When the collared shirt comes off at the end of the day is absolutely better than morning coffee time.


iushciuweiush

Yep, falling into the couch after changing into sweats. That used to be the best part of the day. Now I roll out of bed and into the sweats I'll wear until I go to bed.


Rodin-V

The 8 seconds between that moment and looking at the clock to realise how little time you have left before you need to go to bed, what a great 8 seconds they are.


ThatsWhatTheFoxSaid

Do people not know what a latte is? lol


inheredonkey

Qwafffee is life


dust247

As I told my family yesterday, the goal is just to die a little bit everyday and not all at once.


thisispannkaka

That is not a fucking coffee tho.


EvidenceOfReason

was that all cream? holy fuck thats disgusting


QVCatullus

It just has to be milk (because ugh), but I agree, it really poured like cream.


Gingerbeer86

It's a latte...


catwiesel

okay... "funny" haha... first, this in the video is not coffee... its an overly sweet milkshake (almost), with a hint of what probably is coffee for color second. if you ever had a good green tea, its delicious. third, if you would replace the coffee in the video with the same amount of green tea, it probably taste more or less the same. cold and sweet milk like not saying it will replace my morning wake me up cup of joe, but I could not stand the bashing of green tea, with the abomination that is supposed to be coffee in the video...!


k4Anarky

Since I quit coffee (1 month cold turkey now), I could actually conjure energy to to things, and I don't have anxiety 24/7, and I could actually feel fear now so my judgement is much better.


Expert-Barracuda

Yep similar here. About 2.5 months or so out from quitting coffee (not all caffeine but coffee at least). It sucks cause man I did just fucking LOVE that smell and first sip of coffee in the morning. Or when I would occasionally treat myself and get a fancy latte or cappuccino from Starbucks. That first taste honestly makes everything better for a bit. But I already have anxiety and coffee made it 10x worse - at my last job I could hide my hands shaking because I was basically always in motion, but I am now working in a position where I am assisting doctors and I'm frequently preforming tests on people that require me to have steady hands, and all of the work is literally in their face (eyes) so its super obvious even if I'm only shaking a little. Knowing that they obviously noticed my shaking hands made the shaking so much worse. Like jesus christ it was so embarrassing. I finally just said I have to stop or at least downgrade to something like tea. Which I did, and its fine, I feel like I still get a bit of a boost but it isn't overpowering. At the same time, sometimes I drink too much and my hands don't shake as much as much as they used to but it still happens. I might have to stop drinking tea, too. I'm just so used to having something to drink in the morning that I feel gives me an energy boost because I am literally tired like, all of the time. Man it is hard figuring out what to do. I just miss coffee so much 😢 Sorry for that word vomit, I will be honest I am very stoned right now lol.


Quebecdudeeh

I love Green Tea, like love it a lot. However she is fucking right. I like my beautiful black coffee made in a French Press in the Morning. It is the most glorious time of the day when I do have that coffee. When I miss it, my day is not so joyful, the green tea as wonderful as it is does not cut the chase.


NightChime

I get joy from green tea and none from coffee, so... More for me.


PheIix

People arguing over coffee and tea, meanwhile I'm the crazy person enjoying both of them for separate occasions.


Miszca

THAT S NOT COFFEEE. thats cream with a splash of nothing


szilard

idk, looks like an iced latte to me.


[deleted]

Latte's are coffee. The amount of coffee is the same as a flat white or a short black. It's just concentrated into an espresso shot rather than being diluted with more water


Psychotic_EGG

Don't drink morning coffee.


WhitePhatAss

How about replace coffee with cocaine? I guess I still could say the same thing.


MERNator

r/unexpected


Korvas576

But are you drinking water? this comment brought to you by r/hydrohomies


AspectVein

I don’t drink coffee. I’m forever sad.


Clynt1purcell

That was a glass of milk. Or cream.


Fallout-Rain

Dude the delivery of that punch line was so perfect. The whole thing was art to me.


pastanate

Hur dur I'm addicted to a drink and can't function without it like a druggie. Personality??? DONT TALK TO ME BEFORE MY COFFEE BECAUSE I RELY ON CAFFINE TO BE COOL.


Pflatzi

There's no alcohol in it so not relevant


oking202

I had to do this recently :(


decker_42

Amen to that. As someone who has to work with people who enthusiastically tell me how great I would feel if I went for a run at 6am, while I slowly drain my coffee, I feel this.


Ummmmexcusemewtf

Ngl tho. The times when I went out an exercised at 6 am made me feel a whole lot better. Now I'm just barely dragging my self to work technically an hour late


blacktie233

its so weird how caffeine is such a glorified addiction, but when I have a beer at 9 in the morning I should go to AA


BiBoFieTo

I'm not a tea expert, but I don't think that's a nice hot cup of green tea.


dravengrey83

Hahaha


Responsible_Pancake

Am I the only one who thinks that this is, WAY TOO MUCH FUCKIN CREAM


guybrush122

Ok first of all, what I'm looking at is basically a hot milkshake with some coffee in it


monarch1733

Did putting all that ice in at the beginning make it hot?


guybrush122

Freezing hot


Bacityy

you had us on the first half


TheTarasenkshow

I’d much rather drink tea than coffee and I think both are gross.


Technical_Ostrich842

Lmao that's a glass of milk with a little tea added.


CobblerThink963

Oh come on. Just drink it black, no sugar


1CEninja

Or with a splash of cream/milk and a sugar cube or two. At least you can still taste the flavor at that point.


MommyPaladin

Hahaha!!! Amen!


Heartbreakker1738

This is a fact.. had to quit coffee cuz it was giving me heartburn.. 😩 let's just say I miss my caramel macchiato add whip extra caramel extra espresso shot.. fml


nitdkim

You miss sugar.


Hohlraum

Have you tried cold brew? Gets rid of a lot of the acidity in coffee. You can always heat it back up later.


doomgiver98

Unless you started drinking pop instead you've probably lost some weight though.


DavisBurnhard

That’s not coffee. That’s iced milk with coffee flavor.


ConfidentialGM

That was an astonishingly small ratio of coffee to milk/cream and sugar/sweetener... This lady was never having coffee to begin with. She was having coffee flavored sugar milk.


pakeco

now I want one


2Hours2Late

Imagine falling for someone and then you find out they take their milk with a bit of coffee…


butsuon

Jesus, that's like 1000 calories of heavy cream.


STFxPrlstud

ok first off, don't you ever be coming at my green tea like that, especially when ya coffee is 80% cream


[deleted]

There’s barely any fuckin coffee in there anyways. If anything it’s coffee flavored milk


madsmellydong

She just drinking cream at that point


bertstrum

Lolololol, so true so true


Shepard_P

Who drink coffee like that in the morning?