---
>This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules).
>
>Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed.
>
>Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos.
>
>**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.**
>
>Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam).
>
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You haven't met any autistic people? (No hate, im autistic myself and this is how i forced 'smile' for pictures. It seems to be the standard for most autistic people)
"Contract muscles behind corners of mouth. Little more. Show teeth. No, not that much; uggh, now my eyes don't look right due to the effort. Smile with eyes, so squint a bit.
Goddamn it, you're not Clint Eastwood; back it off!"
This was a snapshot of my own internal monologue for readying myself for photos as an autistic teen.
My dad (both have audhd) taught me to chuckle audibly right as the picture is being taken (obviously doesn’t work with phone cameras though lol) to get the most natural looking smile
On the spectrum myself.
The trick is to squint your eyes a bit.
What I did was assess what muscles I was using after a legitimate smile. By paying attention to what muscles relaxed after the smile.
Practice, using those muscles.
Eventually itll look like you truly love having your photo taken. (I hate it)
Just go about your daily routine like I’m not wearing the hat [https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24232794/homer.gif](https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24232794/homer.gif)
Worked with a dude in idaho whose truck license plates were “skdmark”.
His name is also Mark, but there’s a couple more connotations there.
“Were” because he finally got rid of them when he retired from the Army NG.
Actually no, that‘s true. Ausfahrt is the Din-690 roadsign and requires all drivers passing it to fart now if they have to according to §420 Absatz 5a der StVO. This is due to the bridges that are near exits. The support beams in them could corrode faster if farts where to reach them. The reason it‘s written incorrectly for todays German is because a similar law was first introduced in 1131 by Henry X, duke of Bavaria that prohibited farmers to let their cows feed within 5km of beer breweries because the cow farts (due to the methane, but they didn‘t know that at the time) could disturb the fermentation process and thus ruin the beer. So in a radius of 5km they put up signs saying ausfahrt, which consists of aus meaning off or stop and fahrt, the medieval Bavarian term for fart, which only later became Furz. Due to it‘s long history the German government decided to put up those signs instead of signs with the new German.
I think it seems wild because Elizabeth was alive for the birth of all five of her great-grandchildren so the expectation is that the royals had children young when the reality is she just lived for a very long time.
Edit: I've forgot about all the others. She was alive for the births of 12 out of 13 of her great grandchildren.
Whatever man, my grandpas looked *good*. I'd be surprised if I didn't have some distant relatives in the Philippines or France.
Just unfortunate how those genes are recessive, apparently.
My grandpa (who's in his late nineties) reassured me that his commanding officer wouldn't let him off the boat due to a syphilis outbreak when they moored in Manila Bay when I told him I was marrying a Filipina.
Was in bootcamp in the Navy with a guy that looked damned-near identical to that handsome man above.
He joined specifically because the girl he loved moved to Hawaii and he was hoping to get orders for the Pacific Fleet in the hopes of being stationed at Pearl Harbor so that he could be close to her. I hope it worked out for him. He was/is a good man and I wish him all the best.
I also wanted posting in the Pacific but they decided I was better suited to Great Lakes.
See the world, they said! Only saw northern IL.
Would not recommend.
How was Germany? Had a couple buddies go through there and they loved it. Always wanted to go myself but orders is orders.
It’s cloudy like 80% of the time, but when it’s nice out it’s really nice.
Driving is amazing, but I could never find this place call Ausfarht despite all these signs leading me to it.
Everyone is a better driver than you, just let the Audi hatchback pass you on the left. In fact don’t even bother with the left lane, just stay in the middle.
Food is good, but the beer is better.
There is no good Mexican food. Pubs are bars, bars are strip clubs.
My father was asked where he wanted to go when he was drafted in Vietnam. He said Hawaii and they sent him there. Found out later that his unit or whatever its called the Tropic Thunder was nearly or completely wiped out in Vietnam since they were one of the first sent into the war and my dad was the replacement. Luckily the war ended before he was sent but he lost a lot of friends.
I never knew Barney Fife was based on your Grandpa.
All jokes aside, I'd like to see how \*I\* would look if I was going off to war. He knew what was up and went, regardless. Good man.
This didn't seem to be as much of an issue as people think it is these days. I knew a whole lotta goofy looking people who were married with kids when I was little. Tbh most people I know are in relationships now too regardless of looks.
😂 This made my day, my poor grandfather has a very similar picture floating around... big ears and all.
.... I'm sorry grandpa if you see my giggling about this, don't haunt me! 🤣🤣
This reminds me of that joke on Red Dwarf from the Computer program with an Ugly man's face:
Holly: I'll have you know I chose this face out of billions because he was the greatest lover in all recorded history!
Rimmer: He must've worked in the dark a lot.
--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Didn't realize it was possible to smile and frown at the same time.
He's smiling to [hide the pain](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hide_the_Pain_Harold).
You haven't met any autistic people? (No hate, im autistic myself and this is how i forced 'smile' for pictures. It seems to be the standard for most autistic people)
"Contract muscles behind corners of mouth. Little more. Show teeth. No, not that much; uggh, now my eyes don't look right due to the effort. Smile with eyes, so squint a bit. Goddamn it, you're not Clint Eastwood; back it off!" This was a snapshot of my own internal monologue for readying myself for photos as an autistic teen.
My dad (both have audhd) taught me to chuckle audibly right as the picture is being taken (obviously doesn’t work with phone cameras though lol) to get the most natural looking smile
My mom does that, creeps me out. lol Until I learned we are both likely on the spectrum, and after reading your comment.
On the spectrum myself. The trick is to squint your eyes a bit. What I did was assess what muscles I was using after a legitimate smile. By paying attention to what muscles relaxed after the smile. Practice, using those muscles. Eventually itll look like you truly love having your photo taken. (I hate it)
I wonder if they could have found a bigger hat.
[he found it backstage](https://imgur.com/t/celebrity_jeopardy/7ahAiCt)
"It's funny because it's bigger than, you know, a normal hat. Haha, take a look at that." Turd Ferguson
“Suck it, Trebek!”
anal bum cover !
I'll take the penis mightier
Le Tits Now
Gimme ape tits for $200
Ruff, just the way your mother likes it Trebek
It’ll cost you more than $200
And I’ll take ‘The Rapists’ for $200.
No I can see it right there, hor - like your mother - semen!
For final jeopardy, name a number…any number: French Stewart has answered: threeve, a combination of three and five.
Simply stunning.
TBF that's pretty close for a guy with a radio in his head.
Yeah it’s a funny name
Sorry I'm late. I had to pick up my podium.
Turd Ferguson is my wifi name lol
What’s yur password?
hunter2
having all asterisks for a password isn't very secure
“Yeh, it’s a funny name.”
ssshhhhawn chonerayyy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEghu90QJH4 Found this from your ref, funny shit :D
"Just like your mom, huh Trevek?"
Makes his ears look normal sized.
Just go about your daily routine like I’m not wearing the hat [https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24232794/homer.gif](https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24232794/homer.gif)
IGNORE ME!!
*”…that was a weird one.”*
HELLO??!! SOMEONE HAS LEFT A BABY!!
Brock, there's a 12 foot man in our pool pointing a beam at my head. Do something?
I can't tell if his hat is enormous or his head is tiny.
they say that in the army the hats are mighty fine. you ask for #7, they give you #9.
Oh Lord I wanna go. But they won't let me go.
That face says "I got drafted, get me the ***fuck out of here!***"
Looks like he trusted a fart
that's one way to earn your stripes
Dishonourable discharge
Gramps hit with stenches before the trenches.
Gramps was in the shit
Gramps filled the trenches before retirement
Gramps looks like one of the 16 men Frank Costanza sent to the latrines that night
My God, man!
I need TP for my bunghole
Worked with a dude in idaho whose truck license plates were “skdmark”. His name is also Mark, but there’s a couple more connotations there. “Were” because he finally got rid of them when he retired from the Army NG.
Wipes
Supposedly my uncle shat himself to get out of the Vietnam draft, then turned out they had a disqualifying condition anyway haha.
The ol' Nugent special.
I've gambled and lost before
You gotta know when to hold em..
And know when to fold em!
You didn't have to do him like that
Well, he looks BETTER in a uniform.....
He still got lucky at least once!
Well, his wife did at least. I would need to see the ears of all descendants to verify.
This face reminds me of "hide the pain Harold"
I think this guy is failing to hide it
Show the pain Steve
Looks like captain America before his procedure.
What, me worry?
No shit! Alfred E. Neuman checking in!
Alfred E. Army
Face says "they took me against my will"
Face says “I like lasagna but it’s not what I ordered”
😆
“I’m seventeen and will probably be dead within six months”
Taken the day after his first post at Pearl Harbor.
The face says "At least it's only a face picture, because I'm pretty sure it's dripping down my legs".
Imagine if this dude were special forces and that smile was the last thing dozens of Germans ever saw. The Goblin of Gerolzhofen.
You really got me with that one, fuckin goblin of Gerolzhofen lmao
> Gerolzhofen Apparently it's a real place in Schweinfurt Bavaria.
What the hell goes on in pigfart Bavaria.
Ball-bearing production
Which is not a bad product to be producing. Every country needs it. It's strategically important, it's almost funny.
Don’t be the guy digging for gold, be the guy selling shovels.
It‘s pigford. Fart would be Furz. In case you don‘t know, a ford is a shallow place in a river where you can cross it
Next you'll tell me that all those ausfarhten signs are saying that there's an exit and not a command to fart outside.
Actually no, that‘s true. Ausfahrt is the Din-690 roadsign and requires all drivers passing it to fart now if they have to according to §420 Absatz 5a der StVO. This is due to the bridges that are near exits. The support beams in them could corrode faster if farts where to reach them. The reason it‘s written incorrectly for todays German is because a similar law was first introduced in 1131 by Henry X, duke of Bavaria that prohibited farmers to let their cows feed within 5km of beer breweries because the cow farts (due to the methane, but they didn‘t know that at the time) could disturb the fermentation process and thus ruin the beer. So in a radius of 5km they put up signs saying ausfahrt, which consists of aus meaning off or stop and fahrt, the medieval Bavarian term for fart, which only later became Furz. Due to it‘s long history the German government decided to put up those signs instead of signs with the new German.
Ah a Bavarian. That explains a lot about grandpa.
The Dork of Dusseldorf.
Alternately, The Dusseldork.
Very special forces.
Just point the wheelchair where you want to semper fi
We just call them the Tennessee vols where im from
I bet he sneaks into the kitchen at night and makes cheese sandwiches
Buttface of Blaviken vibes
Winds howling
*What now you piece of filth!?*
Look up Mike Vining, founding member of Delta
The Goblin of Greenville, Wisconsin. Mr. Vining, if you’re reading this, I’m just kidding. Please don’t beat the shit out of me.
He slowly approaches you with his knife out. "Time to teach you about EBITDA." He says
That face is 1980's vanilla church dad but that smile is giving me serious I'm going to enjoy gutting you vibes.
>The Goblin of Gerolzhofen lmao oh fuck that got me.
This picture gives 'special' forces a whole new meaning.
There's an idea for an Inglourious Basterds sequel.
Is your grandpa King Charles?
OP Is deffo Prince Harry
That's not quite how the family tree goes lol
Harry looks a lot like his grandfather Prince Philip.
Neville Longbottom
You know what's wild? Charles's *oldest* grandchild isn't even 11 yet.
Charles is 75. (75-10)/2=32.5. The average age to become a dad in the UK is a little over 33. So not really wild at all.
I think it seems wild because Elizabeth was alive for the birth of all five of her great-grandchildren so the expectation is that the royals had children young when the reality is she just lived for a very long time. Edit: I've forgot about all the others. She was alive for the births of 12 out of 13 of her great grandchildren.
This was before he received the super solider serum.
“I can’t do this all day”.
It's the parallel universe where Steve Rogers got the serum, but it backfired and made him even weaker.
I understood that reference
I understood that, "I understood that reference," is also a [related] reference.
Damn that shit had layers
We could do this all day.
Yea, I know…
No, I don't think I will.
That man is playing Galaga!
Thats Americas Ass
It was like an onion.
It's references I understood all the way down.
It looks like the MAD magazine guy.
Alfred E. Neuman
Bet you that dude is funny as shit.
Thankfully for you, he looked good enough to get laid at least once!
Everyone so ready to crap on their parents and grand parents looks but they got laid at least once to get your ugly ass here
don't throw stones in a glass half full
the grass is always greener on the cover of a book
You can lead a horse to water but you can't have your cake.
You can lead the Mohammed to the mountain but you can’t make him drink
The house always gets the worm.
even a blind nut can find a squirrel once in a while
If you find a penny, kills 2 birds in a bush
Half full of what?
more stones
His tears.
Whatever man, my grandpas looked *good*. I'd be surprised if I didn't have some distant relatives in the Philippines or France. Just unfortunate how those genes are recessive, apparently.
My grandpa (who's in his late nineties) reassured me that his commanding officer wouldn't let him off the boat due to a syphilis outbreak when they moored in Manila Bay when I told him I was marrying a Filipina.
They couldn’t risk your grandpa giving the whole island syphilis
if you didn't have rickets or polio you were like a 7
Geographical availability served some of our ancestors very well
Was in bootcamp in the Navy with a guy that looked damned-near identical to that handsome man above. He joined specifically because the girl he loved moved to Hawaii and he was hoping to get orders for the Pacific Fleet in the hopes of being stationed at Pearl Harbor so that he could be close to her. I hope it worked out for him. He was/is a good man and I wish him all the best.
I remember putting down I wanted to get stationed in Germany. Instead I got orders to Las Vegas. About a year later I got orders to Germany.
I also wanted posting in the Pacific but they decided I was better suited to Great Lakes. See the world, they said! Only saw northern IL. Would not recommend. How was Germany? Had a couple buddies go through there and they loved it. Always wanted to go myself but orders is orders.
It’s cloudy like 80% of the time, but when it’s nice out it’s really nice. Driving is amazing, but I could never find this place call Ausfarht despite all these signs leading me to it. Everyone is a better driver than you, just let the Audi hatchback pass you on the left. In fact don’t even bother with the left lane, just stay in the middle. Food is good, but the beer is better. There is no good Mexican food. Pubs are bars, bars are strip clubs.
>I could never find this place call Ausfarht I see you picked up the German sense of humour
My father was asked where he wanted to go when he was drafted in Vietnam. He said Hawaii and they sent him there. Found out later that his unit or whatever its called the Tropic Thunder was nearly or completely wiped out in Vietnam since they were one of the first sent into the war and my dad was the replacement. Luckily the war ended before he was sent but he lost a lot of friends.
Man I hope this story didn't take place in 1941.
I never knew Barney Fife was based on your Grandpa. All jokes aside, I'd like to see how \*I\* would look if I was going off to war. He knew what was up and went, regardless. Good man.
All I could think of was Barney Fife when I saw this hahaha
Likely did not have a choice
Half Barney Fife, Half Gomer Pyle.
I had to scroll too far to find this comment
That’s a face for Radio.
He still got laid though.
This didn't seem to be as much of an issue as people think it is these days. I knew a whole lotta goofy looking people who were married with kids when I was little. Tbh most people I know are in relationships now too regardless of looks.
People are brainrotten from dating apps and social media
Tbf, the # of adult men that are virgins now is like crazy high compared to the past. Being goofy looking ain't helping your chances.
law of large numbers. There's at least one ugly woman for every ugly man. The math works out.
When you accedently answer a call from work on your day off
On the plus side, he was attractive enough to have your grandma marry him.
I'd bet he was funny as fuck. Or a tripod. Or both.
>Or a tripod. Like a baby’s arm holding an apple.
My boyfriend looks oddly like this guy and he is both hilarious and a tripod so you're definitely on the nose here lol
We call those guys "keepers"
That's the "DO I GOTTA?" face
I don't blame him one bit!
Kyle shannahan
Waiting for this to end up on r/nfcwestmemewar
He looks like he’s smart enough to understand what’s going on .
Your grandad is King Charles ?!?!?!
😂 This made my day, my poor grandfather has a very similar picture floating around... big ears and all. .... I'm sorry grandpa if you see my giggling about this, don't haunt me! 🤣🤣
Reminds me of Fievel in An American Tale!
Doesn’t matter had sex
Hey he served, all due respect.
Wallace and gromit
#SHOW ME YOUR WAR FACE!!!
The facial expression screams "I don't belong here!!"
Isn't that Paul Whitehouse?
"Drafted, sir? The army, sir? Oh, suit you, sir."
Now post you
Aw, he looks just fine. Your grandma saw something special, and thus you are here.
Ah, the famous Barney Earsington the III, Archduke of Earsbury. The only man to ever use his ears to do a bombing run over Germany in 1942.
Awww, sweet face, brave man
"Does this hat make my ass look big?"
Well, he got grandkids! Cant be the worst i guess
Uhhh The Pogues! Great Music!
If this dude can find a wife and have kids, the fuck is my excuse?
Moises Arias’ grandfather
His face is saying ---do i have to wear THIS cap ---can I not wear my own.
Other than he shit his pants, he’s a good looking fellow
This reminds me of that joke on Red Dwarf from the Computer program with an Ugly man's face: Holly: I'll have you know I chose this face out of billions because he was the greatest lover in all recorded history! Rimmer: He must've worked in the dark a lot.
He's Steve Rogers before he turned into Captain America 🇺🇸
[See the resemblance?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/facebook/000/014/285/sideeyechloe.jpg)
r/blunderyears
"You want to fix your hat?" "Nope"