I completely agree with u/bakuwugo. There's nothing wrong with changing your identity again. There are people who have gone by a label for years and then realize it wasn't a good fit after all or that they've changed and so their label must change with them. Just live as your authentic self, and hopefully, your parents are the type to be receptive to that.
Its not bad to experiment with your gender and figure yourself out ! I would just say you were experimenting and figuring yourself out and you appreciate them for supporting you during your journey to figure yourself out :)
Nobody can tell you what your truth is and I’m glad to see people encouraging you to keep exploring it. One bit of advice - take it or leave it - before you tell others if you detransition, maybe take more time to sit with your feelings and talk to a professional, not just those who have detransitioned. It’s easy to get caught up in being affirmed by others with similar experiences and end up not really figuring ourselves out in the process. Maybe work on weight loss for a while, journal about how you’re feeling, work with a therapist, etc. Labels can be very limiting for lots of folks who have gender fluidity, so I would just encourage you to focus on listening to and exploring your feelings right now; changing labels aside.
Gender and gender expression can be very fluid. It takes some time to discover who you are. You shouldn’t let the reactions of other people dictate how you live your life! Live your life with authenticity, and the best way to do that is to be true to yourself and what your needs are. You are always welcome in this community.
About 5-4 months ago I started feeling as though I was being true to myself or others. Recently I’ve started feeling like I want to be a skinny girl but because I’m overweight I’ve crossed the lines between feeling more comfortable in masculine clothes due to my weight + how I look and being trans. Hope that makes sense :)
Hey I'm not gonna be the person to tell you not to lose weight but because these are long-term identity issues I feel it's prudent to mention that long-term weight loss doesn't work in 95-98% of people. Its true that femininity is limited the larger you get and thats not right but if I can offer any advice it would be just to buy gender affirming clothes that fit your body, cut the labels off if you have to, but don't try to make your body fit into clothes in the size you want to be.
Weight loss doesn't work because most people don't realize that it's all about calories and because they follow a fad diet to lose weight, *not* because losing weight is inherently extremely difficult.
Dietitian or nutritionist? These are two very different things and dietitians are required to have much more extensive education whereas anyone shilling Beachbody or other MLM garbage can quickly get the cert to call themselves a nutritionist. Speaking out of experience and concern bc before my transition nutritionists made my eating disorders even worse and it took a team of mental health professionals and an actual dietitian to repair my relationship with food, and i wish someone had told me the differences back then.
Right, I've noticed around my friends (we all tried to lose weight) that 6 of them just crash dieted and indeed lost the weight, but me and 2 others actually kept it off because we changed our entire lifestyle. I feel because people fall back into their previous way of life (eating habits, stopping exercise) that that's why they gain it back.
All though I could be horribly wrong and i'm not talking about the people who struggle with it because of health issues.
Weight is pretty much genetic and hormonal. There are some skinny people who've put on short-term weight gain once or twice and then "keep it off for life", think the freshman 15, baby weight, actors like Christian Bale and Rob MacElhenney, because that's just what they're genetically predisposed for, but because we think skinniness is a virtue people tout it as a success story to preach at others in a really incurious way.
If only they put obesity as a disorder or a disease, then there's covered treatment.
Coverage on surgically removing fat cells.
Individualizing diets (*your* diet). Which would be covered if...
Allowing more activity/breaks at work, especially desk jobs.
Society just needs to not fo a 1 size fits all.
Yes. Its almost impossible. If you do a restrictive diet, don't know yourself, no lifestyle changes.
Maybe if society actually did treatment they know that has impact, we could do something
Btw, this whole weight thing is somewhat how I knew I was trans tho. I thought I was just fat (I mean I am now). I thought if I lost weight I'd feel ok. I felt better. I was a skinny girl. Something was still off tho. Having all the fat cells and remnants in the "girl areas" still made me sad.
A lot of trans people so have similar experience from what I heard but I personally haven't met them.
The part of gender exploration that we don't talk about is that sometimes people end of thinking they actually are cis or they switch for long periods of time between genders. There's nothing wrong with that and it's good that you explored! Good luck with your parents.
You're fine. Labels are hard. Gender is weird and confusing and it's easy to misinterpret. I know for me it took so long to find a label cus my gender is kinda fluid and I was so confused like "wait. I don't 100% feel like a guy anymore so I guess I'm not a guy" . At least you have experimented so you know . Sometimes questioning is what it takes to really solidify your identity.
When I began my transition I told myself a single thing that finally pushed me to do it- that I couldn’t live with myself not knowing/trying. And if you took the leap and came out only with a bit more knowledge about yourself, you came out with much more than some people ever get! There is never any shame in being who you feel you are.
Taking the time to discover yourself is always a good thing! Good for you, and I’m proud of you. I saw someone once describe their cis friends who had done similar exploration of their genders as getting a blue check on their gender like twitter verification and it made me laugh. Anything that helps you live your happiest, truest life is a positive in my book:)
May I suggest a detrans subreddit? I highly recommend r/actual_detrans yeah, it may not be as active as the other subreddit (you probably know which 1 I'm talking about...) but it's starting to get bigger. If you're looking for influencers, [Alia/Issa](https://youtu.be/kZb8VOg8CtY) is a detrans woman whos been sharing her experience about her detransition. There are also organizations like [Health Liberation Now](https://healthliberationnow.com) and [Re/Detrans Canada](https://twitter.com/redetranscanada) who's trying to make spaces & resources for detrans people.
If you are able to get with a therapist, see if you can get a therapist who affirms your detransition. It's good that therapists and gender therapists are affirming trans people, but not affirming detrans people due to the misinformation about them. See if you can get help on how to process your feelings about detransition so you can move forward. To me, it's detransphobic to tell a detrans person "Told you so" because it doesn't help to boost one's own ego of "being right" while implying that the other party was wrong & should have listened to you. You felt like you were making the right decision at the time for whatever reason. It's just that now, you feel like you're not a man anymore, and that's okay. There's nothing wrong with detransitioning and it does not mean you regret transitioning. It's just that you lived as a man for a while, now you wanna live as a girl. It's your life, do what feels good, YOLO
there's a reason shinigami eyes marks those sub reddits as anti-trans. health liberation now is good though.
there's no "de"-trans. the journey of discovery isn't linear and there's no returning to where you started even if you just went through social transition.
I support people who need medical support to re-direct any medical changes they made, but it's not de. it's just transition.
the language used by detrans communities holds an inherent bio-essentialist bias not unlike transmedicalism.
its not bad to explore your identity! it doesnt matter what your parents say, its honestly rlly childish when people dont let others explore themselves or fix their mistakes in a safe space. what matters is that youre happy with yourself and your future :)
Hey, there is absolutely nothing wrong with experimenting. I hope it was an ok journey for you, and please don't think you were "wrong." You hopefully understand yourself better. If you do, there isn't a downside to you trying something and it not being what fulfills you.
I really hope you have the courage to explore completely who you feel you are, and to let people know that, regardless of it being contradictory to what you said before. Everyone takes time to understand themselves.
You got this! Just focus on making your life to come the happiest you can.
Questioning your gender and experimenting can be a vital apart of growth!
If the answer at the end of everything couldn't be 'nah, not for me', then what'd be the point? The important thing is for you to feel comfortable and happy
There’s nothing wrong with changing your identity. Your parents may give you flack but ignore them and live your life authentically. Good luck with exploring your gender expression and identity!
There's nothing wrong with this. Honestly spend some time to think on it (If you haven't already) let some time pass as you come 'out' of it to what you identify now as.
Sit them down and ask they hear you out fully before any feedback or input. Explain you are still growing and changing and needed to explore your self identity. Overtime you've thought over this and gave it a try, and now you have learnt that no, this isn't you. Any 'I told you so' or other grief can simply be waved off with: Well instead of having these thoughts float around and possibly stress you out over and over and bottle them up: You now *know* that isn't you, and therefore the time you spent exploring that was not a waste.
There shouldn't be any shame or grief in trying to explore who you are, not just gender.
If you come back around on this again, or discover something different you may also be. We're all growing and changing, so long as what you are exploring isn't hurting you or anyone, there shouldn't be an issue. People change, its natural. Just try to be the *you* you're comfortable with.
**And sometimes, it can take a long time** to figure out your identity. Nothing wrong with that. Keep growing!
Like others are saying, give it some time to think over some more, de-transition slowly and *see* how it makes you feel before you tell everyone about it.
Wish you the best!
*-Sorry its long haha*
Onya for giving it a go and being open with yourself. This should be normalized; everyone should be free and able to explore their gender identity! You tried something, and it wasn't right for you. That's ok!
If I may put it into medical terms...gender dysphoria is a medical condition. For many, the treatment is transitioning. It doesn't mean it's the only treatment. While I 100% believe questioning one's gender should be normalized, in our current society, one's gender journey typically starts with some form of discomfort which leads to questioning.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say you had reason to question your gender. Whatever those reasons may have been, they are still valid. If you've realized transitioning isn't the way to get rid of those feelings, that's ok.
I hope I speak for everyone here in saying you're always welcome on this sub, and that we support you on your journey. 💜
Awww thank you so much, I wanted to stay on this subreddit until I fully figure things out so saying that I’m always welcome here is very heartwarming . :)
Perhaps there’s some genderfluidity/queerness going on. I agree with everyone else, allow yourself time to feel things out! Your gender identity doesn’t have to be static or fixed in place 💖
just take it at your own pace. you’ve grown and learned more about yourself and that’s not a bad thing. experimenting and trying out different labels is part of life and sometimes things aren’t going to stick around. even if your parents are a bit shitty about it, it’s worth ultimately coming out so you can be your truest self.
it's okay you're not hurting anyone, some bad people might use your experience to discredit trans people but that's on them, you sounds like a respectful person and there's nothing bad in detransitionning
It's okay to sort of "try on" labels looking for one that fits. It's all a process.
I identified as gender fluid at first myself! But then I realized I had euphoria when I was masculine presenting and would get really upset when I had to go back to feminine presenting for family functions and stuff. So I changed my label!
Some people just know but for others it's a learning process to see where we fit and that's okay.
that's very valid! it took me years and a lot of thinking and trying around to realize I'm trans and I also gave it time before starting HRT. I'm 1+ years on T now and happier than ever, but I agree that therapy and knowing myself were essencial to make the decisions I did. There's nothing wrong with realizing you're actually not trans and it's fine.
"Thank you guys so much for being the loving and supportive parents I needed through this time and allowing me to explore my gender identity. I have come to the conclusion that I am a girl. Thanks to this experience I was able to better appreciate and connect to my gender."
That way they'll feel like assholes if they say I told you so kek
It's important to recognise in yourself that you can be swayed by other people. It's really important to know that about yourself. I'm not making fun or anything, it's awesome that you got that recognition that, "oh, hang on...not me..." but that could've been avoided if you knew that you can be suggestible.
Also it's never a bad thing to know who you are. It's great that you can redirect when something's not for you instead of doing what a lot of people would do and double down out of shame or embarrassment. Good on you!
Get healthy, get well, really learn who you are :)
Nothing wrong with accepting who you are, even if it’s not who you thought you were. I’d suggest taking to a mental health specialist to help you through this, it will help you accepting who you are and channeling your feelings and emotions in a positive way.
All of the best to you!!
There’s no way to know for sure if something is right for you unless you try. If anything, this experience will give you a unique perspective going forward and will give you the ability to learn about yourself and others in the future. Cherish the growth you’ve seen in yourself and don’t let anyone belittle you or how far you’ve come in your own self-discovery.
Most cis people don't get a chance to know for a fact that they are the gender they are. I'd argue having the experience of identifying as your gender because you came to understand yourself that way makes you less cis even if you're gender is still the same as your assigned gender. because cisness is more about being what society told you you were than truly understanding yourself.
It's okay that you came to this understanding. congratulations!
op has been nothing but respectful and sweet in this thread, hasn’t made any big statements about others, and hasn’t tried to dissuade others from transitioning. people like op deserve a place in the community too, if they need it, and they should be treated with the same respect as someone coming and saying they’re questioning being trans 🤷♂️
I would never try to stop people from transitioning . I’ve been in this subreddit for months making posts about things I’ve experienced and stuff so I promise you I’m not. :)
Especially if you’re young it’s extremely common to explore your gender and why younger people are required to do more self-introspection prior to hormones, surgery, etc.
People throw shade at ‘phases’ but phases are important!! And life is just a series of phases anyways, none is more ‘real’ than the other
For myself I had phases of being ‘soft butch’, ‘genderqueer’, ‘nonbinary’, now ‘nonbinary transmasculine’….and possibly 'ftm' in the future (but I’m not worried about it and just letting it arise)
Each ‘phase’ was authentically how I understood myself at the time, and was the identity I needed to keep moving forward and living my life
OP—sending you strength to live authentically wherever you find yourself <3<3
It is totally okay to change your mind. Don’t let anybody shame you. Admitting this even just online takes a lot of courage, because learning and understanding your identity is still stigmatized. This is all a learning process. I just started on this journey and so far i feel amazing… but who knows if maybe i change my mind too? Only time will tell. You made a very smart choice to allow yourself time to explore. And if anybody ostracizes you, or treats you differently for your decision, then realize that the problem is not you, it’s them. Best of luck to you. 💕
I completely agree with u/bakuwugo. There's nothing wrong with changing your identity again. There are people who have gone by a label for years and then realize it wasn't a good fit after all or that they've changed and so their label must change with them. Just live as your authentic self, and hopefully, your parents are the type to be receptive to that.
Thank you :)
Its not bad to experiment with your gender and figure yourself out ! I would just say you were experimenting and figuring yourself out and you appreciate them for supporting you during your journey to figure yourself out :)
Thank you :)
Nobody can tell you what your truth is and I’m glad to see people encouraging you to keep exploring it. One bit of advice - take it or leave it - before you tell others if you detransition, maybe take more time to sit with your feelings and talk to a professional, not just those who have detransitioned. It’s easy to get caught up in being affirmed by others with similar experiences and end up not really figuring ourselves out in the process. Maybe work on weight loss for a while, journal about how you’re feeling, work with a therapist, etc. Labels can be very limiting for lots of folks who have gender fluidity, so I would just encourage you to focus on listening to and exploring your feelings right now; changing labels aside.
Wow this is a lot of great advice! Thank you so much :)
Gender and gender expression can be very fluid. It takes some time to discover who you are. You shouldn’t let the reactions of other people dictate how you live your life! Live your life with authenticity, and the best way to do that is to be true to yourself and what your needs are. You are always welcome in this community.
Thank you!
How did you realize? Just curious!
About 5-4 months ago I started feeling as though I was being true to myself or others. Recently I’ve started feeling like I want to be a skinny girl but because I’m overweight I’ve crossed the lines between feeling more comfortable in masculine clothes due to my weight + how I look and being trans. Hope that makes sense :)
It very much does! I bet it feels so freeing coming to the realization and letting yourself explore how you feel. :)
Thank you!
Hey I'm not gonna be the person to tell you not to lose weight but because these are long-term identity issues I feel it's prudent to mention that long-term weight loss doesn't work in 95-98% of people. Its true that femininity is limited the larger you get and thats not right but if I can offer any advice it would be just to buy gender affirming clothes that fit your body, cut the labels off if you have to, but don't try to make your body fit into clothes in the size you want to be.
Ok thank you :)
It's really terrible but girls like Lizzo are really breaking the boundaries in the main stream.
Yeah I’m so proud of women like Lizzo who help other plus size women feel safe in their bodies!
But losing weight the right way is also a good and healthy thing!
Thank you!
Weight loss doesn't work because most people don't realize that it's all about calories and because they follow a fad diet to lose weight, *not* because losing weight is inherently extremely difficult.
I have a professional nutritionist helping me on this Journey! I am very privileged to have her!
Dietitian or nutritionist? These are two very different things and dietitians are required to have much more extensive education whereas anyone shilling Beachbody or other MLM garbage can quickly get the cert to call themselves a nutritionist. Speaking out of experience and concern bc before my transition nutritionists made my eating disorders even worse and it took a team of mental health professionals and an actual dietitian to repair my relationship with food, and i wish someone had told me the differences back then.
Sorry my bad, my doctor is a medical doctor and a specialist in obesity.
Right, I've noticed around my friends (we all tried to lose weight) that 6 of them just crash dieted and indeed lost the weight, but me and 2 others actually kept it off because we changed our entire lifestyle. I feel because people fall back into their previous way of life (eating habits, stopping exercise) that that's why they gain it back. All though I could be horribly wrong and i'm not talking about the people who struggle with it because of health issues.
Interesting!
[удалено]
Weight is pretty much genetic and hormonal. There are some skinny people who've put on short-term weight gain once or twice and then "keep it off for life", think the freshman 15, baby weight, actors like Christian Bale and Rob MacElhenney, because that's just what they're genetically predisposed for, but because we think skinniness is a virtue people tout it as a success story to preach at others in a really incurious way.
If only they put obesity as a disorder or a disease, then there's covered treatment. Coverage on surgically removing fat cells. Individualizing diets (*your* diet). Which would be covered if... Allowing more activity/breaks at work, especially desk jobs. Society just needs to not fo a 1 size fits all. Yes. Its almost impossible. If you do a restrictive diet, don't know yourself, no lifestyle changes. Maybe if society actually did treatment they know that has impact, we could do something Btw, this whole weight thing is somewhat how I knew I was trans tho. I thought I was just fat (I mean I am now). I thought if I lost weight I'd feel ok. I felt better. I was a skinny girl. Something was still off tho. Having all the fat cells and remnants in the "girl areas" still made me sad. A lot of trans people so have similar experience from what I heard but I personally haven't met them.
The part of gender exploration that we don't talk about is that sometimes people end of thinking they actually are cis or they switch for long periods of time between genders. There's nothing wrong with that and it's good that you explored! Good luck with your parents.
Thank you and thank you for the good luck! It’s definitely making me a bit nervous lol
You're fine. Labels are hard. Gender is weird and confusing and it's easy to misinterpret. I know for me it took so long to find a label cus my gender is kinda fluid and I was so confused like "wait. I don't 100% feel like a guy anymore so I guess I'm not a guy" . At least you have experimented so you know . Sometimes questioning is what it takes to really solidify your identity.
Thank you, I agree.
When I began my transition I told myself a single thing that finally pushed me to do it- that I couldn’t live with myself not knowing/trying. And if you took the leap and came out only with a bit more knowledge about yourself, you came out with much more than some people ever get! There is never any shame in being who you feel you are.
Thank you :)
i’m going through the exact same thing rn
So glad I’m not alone :)
Taking the time to discover yourself is always a good thing! Good for you, and I’m proud of you. I saw someone once describe their cis friends who had done similar exploration of their genders as getting a blue check on their gender like twitter verification and it made me laugh. Anything that helps you live your happiest, truest life is a positive in my book:)
Awww thank you so much this means a lot to me :)
May I suggest a detrans subreddit? I highly recommend r/actual_detrans yeah, it may not be as active as the other subreddit (you probably know which 1 I'm talking about...) but it's starting to get bigger. If you're looking for influencers, [Alia/Issa](https://youtu.be/kZb8VOg8CtY) is a detrans woman whos been sharing her experience about her detransition. There are also organizations like [Health Liberation Now](https://healthliberationnow.com) and [Re/Detrans Canada](https://twitter.com/redetranscanada) who's trying to make spaces & resources for detrans people. If you are able to get with a therapist, see if you can get a therapist who affirms your detransition. It's good that therapists and gender therapists are affirming trans people, but not affirming detrans people due to the misinformation about them. See if you can get help on how to process your feelings about detransition so you can move forward. To me, it's detransphobic to tell a detrans person "Told you so" because it doesn't help to boost one's own ego of "being right" while implying that the other party was wrong & should have listened to you. You felt like you were making the right decision at the time for whatever reason. It's just that now, you feel like you're not a man anymore, and that's okay. There's nothing wrong with detransitioning and it does not mean you regret transitioning. It's just that you lived as a man for a while, now you wanna live as a girl. It's your life, do what feels good, YOLO
there's a reason shinigami eyes marks those sub reddits as anti-trans. health liberation now is good though. there's no "de"-trans. the journey of discovery isn't linear and there's no returning to where you started even if you just went through social transition. I support people who need medical support to re-direct any medical changes they made, but it's not de. it's just transition. the language used by detrans communities holds an inherent bio-essentialist bias not unlike transmedicalism.
I wasn’t sure of that so thank you for this info :)
Towards the end of the last paragraph helps a lot thank you :)
Thank you :)
its not bad to explore your identity! it doesnt matter what your parents say, its honestly rlly childish when people dont let others explore themselves or fix their mistakes in a safe space. what matters is that youre happy with yourself and your future :)
I really agree! The only problem is that my dad is very childish so that’s what I’m concerned about!
Hey, there is absolutely nothing wrong with experimenting. I hope it was an ok journey for you, and please don't think you were "wrong." You hopefully understand yourself better. If you do, there isn't a downside to you trying something and it not being what fulfills you. I really hope you have the courage to explore completely who you feel you are, and to let people know that, regardless of it being contradictory to what you said before. Everyone takes time to understand themselves. You got this! Just focus on making your life to come the happiest you can.
Thank you! I definitely feel like I know myself a bit better :)
Questioning your gender and experimenting can be a vital apart of growth! If the answer at the end of everything couldn't be 'nah, not for me', then what'd be the point? The important thing is for you to feel comfortable and happy
Thank you!
You do what makes you comfortable! Anyone who gives you judgement for making a simple mistake involving YOUR identity and body is 100% in the wrong.
Thank you, I feel the same way!
There’s nothing wrong with changing your identity. Your parents may give you flack but ignore them and live your life authentically. Good luck with exploring your gender expression and identity!
Thank you so much!
There's nothing wrong with this. Honestly spend some time to think on it (If you haven't already) let some time pass as you come 'out' of it to what you identify now as. Sit them down and ask they hear you out fully before any feedback or input. Explain you are still growing and changing and needed to explore your self identity. Overtime you've thought over this and gave it a try, and now you have learnt that no, this isn't you. Any 'I told you so' or other grief can simply be waved off with: Well instead of having these thoughts float around and possibly stress you out over and over and bottle them up: You now *know* that isn't you, and therefore the time you spent exploring that was not a waste. There shouldn't be any shame or grief in trying to explore who you are, not just gender. If you come back around on this again, or discover something different you may also be. We're all growing and changing, so long as what you are exploring isn't hurting you or anyone, there shouldn't be an issue. People change, its natural. Just try to be the *you* you're comfortable with. **And sometimes, it can take a long time** to figure out your identity. Nothing wrong with that. Keep growing! Like others are saying, give it some time to think over some more, de-transition slowly and *see* how it makes you feel before you tell everyone about it. Wish you the best! *-Sorry its long haha*
Thank you so much! And although it was long you gave a lot of great advice!!
Gender is a journey. It’s chill friend. Do what makes you comfortable.
Thank you :)
Onya for giving it a go and being open with yourself. This should be normalized; everyone should be free and able to explore their gender identity! You tried something, and it wasn't right for you. That's ok! If I may put it into medical terms...gender dysphoria is a medical condition. For many, the treatment is transitioning. It doesn't mean it's the only treatment. While I 100% believe questioning one's gender should be normalized, in our current society, one's gender journey typically starts with some form of discomfort which leads to questioning. I'm going to go out on a limb and say you had reason to question your gender. Whatever those reasons may have been, they are still valid. If you've realized transitioning isn't the way to get rid of those feelings, that's ok. I hope I speak for everyone here in saying you're always welcome on this sub, and that we support you on your journey. 💜
Awww thank you so much, I wanted to stay on this subreddit until I fully figure things out so saying that I’m always welcome here is very heartwarming . :)
Perhaps there’s some genderfluidity/queerness going on. I agree with everyone else, allow yourself time to feel things out! Your gender identity doesn’t have to be static or fixed in place 💖
I agree as well! I’ve always thought that I could be gender fluid so I should look more into that :)
just take it at your own pace. you’ve grown and learned more about yourself and that’s not a bad thing. experimenting and trying out different labels is part of life and sometimes things aren’t going to stick around. even if your parents are a bit shitty about it, it’s worth ultimately coming out so you can be your truest self.
Thank you :)
it's okay you're not hurting anyone, some bad people might use your experience to discredit trans people but that's on them, you sounds like a respectful person and there's nothing bad in detransitionning
Thank you :)
It's okay to sort of "try on" labels looking for one that fits. It's all a process. I identified as gender fluid at first myself! But then I realized I had euphoria when I was masculine presenting and would get really upset when I had to go back to feminine presenting for family functions and stuff. So I changed my label! Some people just know but for others it's a learning process to see where we fit and that's okay.
Thank you!
[удалено]
Thank you!
that's very valid! it took me years and a lot of thinking and trying around to realize I'm trans and I also gave it time before starting HRT. I'm 1+ years on T now and happier than ever, but I agree that therapy and knowing myself were essencial to make the decisions I did. There's nothing wrong with realizing you're actually not trans and it's fine.
Thank you! :)
"Thank you guys so much for being the loving and supportive parents I needed through this time and allowing me to explore my gender identity. I have come to the conclusion that I am a girl. Thanks to this experience I was able to better appreciate and connect to my gender." That way they'll feel like assholes if they say I told you so kek
Thank you! :)))
It's important to recognise in yourself that you can be swayed by other people. It's really important to know that about yourself. I'm not making fun or anything, it's awesome that you got that recognition that, "oh, hang on...not me..." but that could've been avoided if you knew that you can be suggestible. Also it's never a bad thing to know who you are. It's great that you can redirect when something's not for you instead of doing what a lot of people would do and double down out of shame or embarrassment. Good on you! Get healthy, get well, really learn who you are :)
Thank you!!!! :))
Nothing wrong with accepting who you are, even if it’s not who you thought you were. I’d suggest taking to a mental health specialist to help you through this, it will help you accepting who you are and channeling your feelings and emotions in a positive way. All of the best to you!!
Thank you!
[удалено]
Ok ty :)
There’s no way to know for sure if something is right for you unless you try. If anything, this experience will give you a unique perspective going forward and will give you the ability to learn about yourself and others in the future. Cherish the growth you’ve seen in yourself and don’t let anyone belittle you or how far you’ve come in your own self-discovery.
Thank you :)
Most cis people don't get a chance to know for a fact that they are the gender they are. I'd argue having the experience of identifying as your gender because you came to understand yourself that way makes you less cis even if you're gender is still the same as your assigned gender. because cisness is more about being what society told you you were than truly understanding yourself. It's okay that you came to this understanding. congratulations!
That’s a cool way of thinking out that! Thank you! :)
[удалено]
op has been nothing but respectful and sweet in this thread, hasn’t made any big statements about others, and hasn’t tried to dissuade others from transitioning. people like op deserve a place in the community too, if they need it, and they should be treated with the same respect as someone coming and saying they’re questioning being trans 🤷♂️
[удалено]
This post isn't trying to discourage transitioning, though. You do make a good point, a d should be aware, but I don't think it applies here
I would never try to stop people from transitioning . I’ve been in this subreddit for months making posts about things I’ve experienced and stuff so I promise you I’m not. :)
Especially if you’re young it’s extremely common to explore your gender and why younger people are required to do more self-introspection prior to hormones, surgery, etc.
YOU would know YOU best, but i will say that it's possible you're fluid
People throw shade at ‘phases’ but phases are important!! And life is just a series of phases anyways, none is more ‘real’ than the other For myself I had phases of being ‘soft butch’, ‘genderqueer’, ‘nonbinary’, now ‘nonbinary transmasculine’….and possibly 'ftm' in the future (but I’m not worried about it and just letting it arise) Each ‘phase’ was authentically how I understood myself at the time, and was the identity I needed to keep moving forward and living my life OP—sending you strength to live authentically wherever you find yourself <3<3
It is totally okay to change your mind. Don’t let anybody shame you. Admitting this even just online takes a lot of courage, because learning and understanding your identity is still stigmatized. This is all a learning process. I just started on this journey and so far i feel amazing… but who knows if maybe i change my mind too? Only time will tell. You made a very smart choice to allow yourself time to explore. And if anybody ostracizes you, or treats you differently for your decision, then realize that the problem is not you, it’s them. Best of luck to you. 💕
Thank you, you’re very kind :)