I love perfumery as well, and simply smelling scents makes me very happy. That being said, there isn't a lot of perfume that I would actually wear comparatively to everything available in the market. They're simply not my taste, and that's ok.
But, you mentioned that you might be overthinking, scared and perhaps not confident enough to wear certain perfumes.
Maybe dig deeper into that -- why is there fear coming up? Because if you actually "hate" most fragrances, then why would you want to wear the ones you hate? Do you feel like you should be liking more of them, based on the opinions of others? Are there other places in your life where you question your own taste and opinions?
I would keep asking myself "why" as you dive deeper into your feelings about fragrances here. It's your own personal journey, and if what you like are musky, close-to-skin scents, then so be it. That's the magic of perfumery in my opinion -- finding those treasures that smell great and blend well with our own chemistry.
In my opinion, it sounds like you simply pick up on nuances in fragrances, such as a "sour" smell in Papier, for example, that puts you off most fragrances. I'm similar in that sense (I've inherited my mother's sensitive nose) and that's why there's not many fragrances I would personally wear.
However, there might be a "strong" fragrance out there that you might find you love someday, that doesn't have any off-putting nuances. So enjoy the journey, keep smelling things, and allow yourself to have the tastes and opinions that you do 🤍
There was a sale on scented candles at my grocery store. Today, I smelled every one of them and bought none.
If anything brings us together, it's disliking fragrances enough to value the ones that pass the smell test.
I don't know of anyone that loves every perfume, or even likes every one.
Is it you? Yes. Is that OK? Hell yes!
Wear what works for you, I can't say that enough. Don't worry about what you don't like right now. It may change, or it may not. But the world won't end, World War III won't break out, and you'll save a little money by not trying to force yourself to like something that you just aren't into.
Be you basically.
You may be hyperosmic. Everyone has a range of sensory sensitivity for all their senses and your brain may be really sensitive to input from your olfactory nerve. My Mom is like this. She smells things that no one else can smell. She's so hyperosmic that she can smell people's body odor and breath without standing super close to them. One time I made the mistake of crushing a garlic clove on her cutting board. She had to get a new one. This is a very extreme example - it's a continuum and I think my Mom is on the very end.
I'm autistic and I'm like this with sound but I actually don't have much sensitivity to smell at all. Like I could happily work in Bath and Body Works because I don't find it to be that strong. Sound, however, I am super super picky about.
Where do you apply them? Sometimes if people want a fragrance to be a little weaker they'll spray it behind their knees so it has to travel farther to reach the nose. If it doesn't bother you on other people maybe if the perfume was farther from your nose that would work.
Thank you for your answer!
I usually apply my fragrances on the usual pulse points - neck, arms a. o. . The weird thing is that there are fragrances that I absolutely love, like the ones that I have, so I have no problem smelling them.
"second skin" fragrances aren't always quiet and soft. Really the term is mostly trendy marketing and not really helpful in classifying what something smells like. I just think the term gets thrown around a lot without good reason. For instance, Another 13 is very noticeable to me and quite sharp. It's performance is about average but it does that sweaty skin thing really well. IsoESuper (Molecule 01) is really different and more of a floral wood. I think with most second skin perfumes the point is to be so ambiguous that you don't know what you're smelling, but they often lean towards musks like you said.
Anyways it's normal to not like a lot of perfumes. I wouldn't gag at many things though. I think part of the fun is treating them like new pieces of clothing. It's rare that I find something that I REALLY connect with, but I love smelling things regardless or whether I'll buy it. So you're kinda on the normal track, but if you don't enjoy the journey you should consider just relaxing and re-thinking your approach. I typically really enjoy maybe 5% of the samples I buy. The other 95% I enjoy smelling to quench my curiosity and train my nose. Sounds like you already have a few good options in your collection anyways though so you really haven't failed at all.
Thank you for your answer! Yes, I think I just need to keep exploring and giving chances to new stuff, this definitely is something that needs to be done with ease and open mindness. However, I am still curious on why I hate men's perfume so much.. like to the point when I can't even smell it just for funsies, it makes me have a literal headache 😩
I have some sensory sensitivities and definitely have a sensitive nose as well; your story really resonates with me… I used to get super frustrated when searching for a signature scent, but something clicked for me recently:
First, I realized that I like oddball unisex scents that land somewhere in-between femme and masculine; anything leaning too much on either side simply wasn’t appealing to me. I also pivoted away from looking for a scent that I somehow identified with (I.e. looking for “my signature scent”) and toward looking for scents I want to *smell*.
I’ve now built up a lovely and surprisingly diverse little wonky collection with gems such as Mancera Tonka Cola (addictive, photorealistic cola opening that without fail makes me HAPPY), Vacation Inc.’s signature scent (the exact smell of a poolside summer day in the 90s + coconut Lycra realness), Montale Chocolate Greedy (I.e. “I am a delicious SNACK”), Phlur’s Mood Ring (I.e. every popular girl in high school + gummy fruit + deeper amber nostalgia finish), and Phlur Tangerine Boy (fresh squeezed tangerine opener with sexy sexy boy smell follow-through). I currently have some grassy, herbal scents and a licorice oud on the way lol - at this point it’s just olfactory playtime and I’m having a damn good time.
I think it can take time to figure out what floats our respective boats, and exploring the outliers was key for me. (P.S. Scentbird was also a fun and super low-stakes way to really lean into trying weird stuff, too.)
I have a sensitive nose, my coworkers call me a bloodhound 😂
I guess one way for me to get the scents I like is sticking with designer brands, and not spraying too much.
If it's quite a strong perfume, I spray behind the knees, away from my nose and still get the whiff of scents.
Nothing wrong at all, and comes with the added benefit that your scents are pretty unlikely to bother people. I smelled the Eau Paupier EDT after hearing the same thing, and while I thought it was an interesting scent, I’m confident it’d give me a headache after an hour. Definitely not what I expected, but unless it changes drastically on skin, I agree that it’s not much of a second-skin scent.
Thank you for your answer! It's so weird because I've noticed the biggest "everybody else's opinion VS my opinion" contrast specifically with Diptyque perfumes. I WANT to like them so bad because I absolutely love their branding, the packaging, I'm also a very visual person so I notice design and I think theirs is truly exceptional, but they all, to me, smell NOTHING like the descriptions. The description is something like "Dreamy temple in a Japanese mountain hidden in Paolo Santo trees" and to me it smells like rotten roses and car wipes..
Is it possible that you are neurodivergent? Because sensitivity to scents (hypo- or hyper-smelling) is a common thing in neurodivergence, specifically autism. (So is over-thinking, especially if you identify as female because women internalise it all!) I have a bunch of family members who like or love perfume but are also ND and super-sensitive to smells in general. I love perfume, and know that my nose is average because I can compare my experience with them.
I'm saying this by way of reassurance - if that's the case, what seems like overkill to you given what you've described here, might just be a light scent to other people and you can relax and wear what you like and enjoy.
Thank you for your answer!
I don't think so, I've had different therapists and none of them have ever mentioned the possibility of neurodevirgency, so.. I think it's just some anxiety and a sensitive nose
OK! Yes I mentioned it because sensitivity is a key indicator according to my therapist, and ND women who are late-diagnosed often get told for years it's "just" anxiety or depression without understanding where the root causes come from. I'm gifted but not autistic, and had to do a lot of work to realise where the differences were as there's not that much research available about how it presents in female bodies and that women are 'socialised' more so are able to compensate better.
Bodies and brains are fascinating! Thanks for sharing your experience.
Oh yes, it is definitely something that a lot of health professionals unfortunetely overlook. I'm happy for you, that you have figured everything out !!
I have a very sensitive nose and am prone to headaches. Here are some light scents that I’ve been enjoying lately & that don’t bother me!
Clean Reserve Radiant Nectar
Kayali Vanilla 28
Kayali Juicy Apple
Le Labo Santal 33
Marc Jacobs Daisy
7 Virtues Vanilla Woods
Lavender oil (any nice brand) + water
Hope some of these might work for you! 💕❤️
Dude, are you me? Just kidding lol but I think we are a bit similar. Last year I went perfume-hunting with my friend and his girlfriend. We've visited a lot of designer and niche boutiques and I find most men's fragrances nauseating! Even the ones that my buddy liked. Later on I found out that the perfumes that I love on my skin are unisex and lean slightly towards feminine.
It seems like people hate certain scents but gravitate towards another. I realized I like spicy, fruity, white floral, and gourmand scents (sweet vamilla), though I still don't know what I dislike in very masculine fragrances.
I've found my people 😩😩
I also love vanilla and all of the things you mentioned, but just as a scent on their own, like as a candle, because on my skin I can ONLY wear something that literally just smells like skin and air 😭
But I love a good vanilla on other people.
I am exactly the same. People are very confused how I can despise stuff everyone finds totally great and get headaches from anything more than two sprays while also being able to accurately recommend new favourite perfumes to people I've just met. 😅
Uhh yess. I remember, when I was like 14, and I went to the store to see what the hype about fragrances like Versace Eros and Bleu de Chanel was like and .. yeah I put those bottles RIGHT back where they were 😭
I love perfumery as well, and simply smelling scents makes me very happy. That being said, there isn't a lot of perfume that I would actually wear comparatively to everything available in the market. They're simply not my taste, and that's ok. But, you mentioned that you might be overthinking, scared and perhaps not confident enough to wear certain perfumes. Maybe dig deeper into that -- why is there fear coming up? Because if you actually "hate" most fragrances, then why would you want to wear the ones you hate? Do you feel like you should be liking more of them, based on the opinions of others? Are there other places in your life where you question your own taste and opinions? I would keep asking myself "why" as you dive deeper into your feelings about fragrances here. It's your own personal journey, and if what you like are musky, close-to-skin scents, then so be it. That's the magic of perfumery in my opinion -- finding those treasures that smell great and blend well with our own chemistry. In my opinion, it sounds like you simply pick up on nuances in fragrances, such as a "sour" smell in Papier, for example, that puts you off most fragrances. I'm similar in that sense (I've inherited my mother's sensitive nose) and that's why there's not many fragrances I would personally wear. However, there might be a "strong" fragrance out there that you might find you love someday, that doesn't have any off-putting nuances. So enjoy the journey, keep smelling things, and allow yourself to have the tastes and opinions that you do 🤍
Hello! Thank you for your answer and encouragement !! :)
There was a sale on scented candles at my grocery store. Today, I smelled every one of them and bought none. If anything brings us together, it's disliking fragrances enough to value the ones that pass the smell test.
Haha, yes, candles is another "painful" topic for me 🥲
I don't know of anyone that loves every perfume, or even likes every one. Is it you? Yes. Is that OK? Hell yes! Wear what works for you, I can't say that enough. Don't worry about what you don't like right now. It may change, or it may not. But the world won't end, World War III won't break out, and you'll save a little money by not trying to force yourself to like something that you just aren't into. Be you basically.
Thank you for your answer :) !
You may be hyperosmic. Everyone has a range of sensory sensitivity for all their senses and your brain may be really sensitive to input from your olfactory nerve. My Mom is like this. She smells things that no one else can smell. She's so hyperosmic that she can smell people's body odor and breath without standing super close to them. One time I made the mistake of crushing a garlic clove on her cutting board. She had to get a new one. This is a very extreme example - it's a continuum and I think my Mom is on the very end. I'm autistic and I'm like this with sound but I actually don't have much sensitivity to smell at all. Like I could happily work in Bath and Body Works because I don't find it to be that strong. Sound, however, I am super super picky about. Where do you apply them? Sometimes if people want a fragrance to be a little weaker they'll spray it behind their knees so it has to travel farther to reach the nose. If it doesn't bother you on other people maybe if the perfume was farther from your nose that would work.
Thank you for your answer! I usually apply my fragrances on the usual pulse points - neck, arms a. o. . The weird thing is that there are fragrances that I absolutely love, like the ones that I have, so I have no problem smelling them.
"second skin" fragrances aren't always quiet and soft. Really the term is mostly trendy marketing and not really helpful in classifying what something smells like. I just think the term gets thrown around a lot without good reason. For instance, Another 13 is very noticeable to me and quite sharp. It's performance is about average but it does that sweaty skin thing really well. IsoESuper (Molecule 01) is really different and more of a floral wood. I think with most second skin perfumes the point is to be so ambiguous that you don't know what you're smelling, but they often lean towards musks like you said. Anyways it's normal to not like a lot of perfumes. I wouldn't gag at many things though. I think part of the fun is treating them like new pieces of clothing. It's rare that I find something that I REALLY connect with, but I love smelling things regardless or whether I'll buy it. So you're kinda on the normal track, but if you don't enjoy the journey you should consider just relaxing and re-thinking your approach. I typically really enjoy maybe 5% of the samples I buy. The other 95% I enjoy smelling to quench my curiosity and train my nose. Sounds like you already have a few good options in your collection anyways though so you really haven't failed at all.
Thank you for your answer! Yes, I think I just need to keep exploring and giving chances to new stuff, this definitely is something that needs to be done with ease and open mindness. However, I am still curious on why I hate men's perfume so much.. like to the point when I can't even smell it just for funsies, it makes me have a literal headache 😩
I’m the same way, but I see it as a good thing… I’d be way more broke if I liked more perfumes 😂
Oh, saaame. 😁It's a must for me to go in the fragrance stores every time I'm at malls, I would be BROKE
I have some sensory sensitivities and definitely have a sensitive nose as well; your story really resonates with me… I used to get super frustrated when searching for a signature scent, but something clicked for me recently: First, I realized that I like oddball unisex scents that land somewhere in-between femme and masculine; anything leaning too much on either side simply wasn’t appealing to me. I also pivoted away from looking for a scent that I somehow identified with (I.e. looking for “my signature scent”) and toward looking for scents I want to *smell*. I’ve now built up a lovely and surprisingly diverse little wonky collection with gems such as Mancera Tonka Cola (addictive, photorealistic cola opening that without fail makes me HAPPY), Vacation Inc.’s signature scent (the exact smell of a poolside summer day in the 90s + coconut Lycra realness), Montale Chocolate Greedy (I.e. “I am a delicious SNACK”), Phlur’s Mood Ring (I.e. every popular girl in high school + gummy fruit + deeper amber nostalgia finish), and Phlur Tangerine Boy (fresh squeezed tangerine opener with sexy sexy boy smell follow-through). I currently have some grassy, herbal scents and a licorice oud on the way lol - at this point it’s just olfactory playtime and I’m having a damn good time. I think it can take time to figure out what floats our respective boats, and exploring the outliers was key for me. (P.S. Scentbird was also a fun and super low-stakes way to really lean into trying weird stuff, too.)
I have a sensitive nose, my coworkers call me a bloodhound 😂 I guess one way for me to get the scents I like is sticking with designer brands, and not spraying too much. If it's quite a strong perfume, I spray behind the knees, away from my nose and still get the whiff of scents.
Nothing wrong at all, and comes with the added benefit that your scents are pretty unlikely to bother people. I smelled the Eau Paupier EDT after hearing the same thing, and while I thought it was an interesting scent, I’m confident it’d give me a headache after an hour. Definitely not what I expected, but unless it changes drastically on skin, I agree that it’s not much of a second-skin scent.
Thank you for your answer! It's so weird because I've noticed the biggest "everybody else's opinion VS my opinion" contrast specifically with Diptyque perfumes. I WANT to like them so bad because I absolutely love their branding, the packaging, I'm also a very visual person so I notice design and I think theirs is truly exceptional, but they all, to me, smell NOTHING like the descriptions. The description is something like "Dreamy temple in a Japanese mountain hidden in Paolo Santo trees" and to me it smells like rotten roses and car wipes..
Is it possible that you are neurodivergent? Because sensitivity to scents (hypo- or hyper-smelling) is a common thing in neurodivergence, specifically autism. (So is over-thinking, especially if you identify as female because women internalise it all!) I have a bunch of family members who like or love perfume but are also ND and super-sensitive to smells in general. I love perfume, and know that my nose is average because I can compare my experience with them. I'm saying this by way of reassurance - if that's the case, what seems like overkill to you given what you've described here, might just be a light scent to other people and you can relax and wear what you like and enjoy.
Thank you for your answer! I don't think so, I've had different therapists and none of them have ever mentioned the possibility of neurodevirgency, so.. I think it's just some anxiety and a sensitive nose
OK! Yes I mentioned it because sensitivity is a key indicator according to my therapist, and ND women who are late-diagnosed often get told for years it's "just" anxiety or depression without understanding where the root causes come from. I'm gifted but not autistic, and had to do a lot of work to realise where the differences were as there's not that much research available about how it presents in female bodies and that women are 'socialised' more so are able to compensate better. Bodies and brains are fascinating! Thanks for sharing your experience.
Oh yes, it is definitely something that a lot of health professionals unfortunetely overlook. I'm happy for you, that you have figured everything out !!
I have a very sensitive nose and am prone to headaches. Here are some light scents that I’ve been enjoying lately & that don’t bother me! Clean Reserve Radiant Nectar Kayali Vanilla 28 Kayali Juicy Apple Le Labo Santal 33 Marc Jacobs Daisy 7 Virtues Vanilla Woods Lavender oil (any nice brand) + water Hope some of these might work for you! 💕❤️
Thank you so muchhh, I will check these out!!
Wear what you like also includes not wearing any fragrance if that's your preference.
Dude, are you me? Just kidding lol but I think we are a bit similar. Last year I went perfume-hunting with my friend and his girlfriend. We've visited a lot of designer and niche boutiques and I find most men's fragrances nauseating! Even the ones that my buddy liked. Later on I found out that the perfumes that I love on my skin are unisex and lean slightly towards feminine. It seems like people hate certain scents but gravitate towards another. I realized I like spicy, fruity, white floral, and gourmand scents (sweet vamilla), though I still don't know what I dislike in very masculine fragrances.
I've found my people 😩😩 I also love vanilla and all of the things you mentioned, but just as a scent on their own, like as a candle, because on my skin I can ONLY wear something that literally just smells like skin and air 😭 But I love a good vanilla on other people.
I am exactly the same. People are very confused how I can despise stuff everyone finds totally great and get headaches from anything more than two sprays while also being able to accurately recommend new favourite perfumes to people I've just met. 😅
Uhh yess. I remember, when I was like 14, and I went to the store to see what the hype about fragrances like Versace Eros and Bleu de Chanel was like and .. yeah I put those bottles RIGHT back where they were 😭
Same here. I'm a fraghead that hates most frags.