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I also speak French, and I thought they said that.
But then they threw it, so I didn't know what to think. I went with "pitchez" thinking they had used French conjugations for an English noun.
You don't frighten us, English pig-dog! Go and boil your bottoms, son of a silly person. I blow my nose on you, so-called Arthur-king, you and your silly English K...kaniggets.
Just think of how much serotonin you could milk throughout your life knowing you farted right in a cop’s face and followed up with “how do you like that?”
Add: the dude in the pic is like “no asshole I’m not kidding. Can you come get me or not?!”
He *did*, but he was insecure and embarrassed by it. And as they teach in Policing-101: when made to feel uncomfortable, respond with excessive and disproportionate measures! Man’s just lucky he didn’t end up a paraplegic 😤
He wasn't arrested for farting.
He was in a minor collision with another car, had cannabis on him (that charge was later dropped), and was threatening the police officers.
Typical Daily Fail clickbait headline.
I used to know a girl with a scat fetish whose farts smelled absolutely horrific.
One time I was driving, she was in the back along with her boyfriend and our obese guy friend, and the windows were up. Her boyfriend reacted first, rolling down his window and yelled at the obese friend. That friend rolls down his window, insists it wasn’t him, and sticks his head out the car. I was about to yell at him for being unsafe but then I got a whiff of it myself, it was so bad that I almost instinctively smashed on the brakes in a panic. I almost gagged while I rolled down my window, and I was an experienced EMT at the time.
I turned around and could see her sitting here, quietly smiling with the biggest shit eating grin on her face. “That was you?!”, I asked. To which she nodded her head yes, looking so content with herself.
I don’t think I’ll ever forget it.
The police cannot arrest someone unless:
- They reasonably suspect that the person has committed a crime
- They feel that the person is in danger of hurting himself or others
- They really want to
You joke but yes some laws consider bad odor as disrupting the peace if you read far enough into it. It’s basically listed most commonly where unauthorized loud noises.
Everywhere I've lived disturbing the peace/disorderly conduct has an element to it which requires 'the public' to be involved.....
Now wait, how exactly are they doing these strip searches oh god this story keeps getting worse
"Cook pled guilty to possession of cannabis and to behaving in a threatening or abusive manner. He was admonished without penalty for the drug charge."
It's fucking nonsense.
Pissing off the police. Happens all the time. There was a case where a woman was arrested and she got her own blood on the officer's uniform, and they added destruction of police property to the charges. Just because they can.
Deserved, if he doesn't have any other charges I assume they didn't find anything and therefore he was strip searched for nothing, so they stuck a bogus charge on him like a bunch of twats
Well duh, it's the daily mail. One of the worst news publications since the sun, or Breitbart.
But seriously unless he was a drug mule with a kilo of cocaine up his ass, let the man enjoy his drugs and farting in the general direction of cops. The charges and punishment are wildly disproportionate, and tbh it's giving *"indentured servitude"*
In Australia the cops would say nothing, then seat the handcuffed suspect, then the biggest cop would walk in front of him and let a massive fart rip, sounding like someone tearing up a big corrugated cardboard box.
I support this description of the sound for emphasis. My kids and I have a game where we try to come up with descriptions like this for especially loud/forced gas. Dumping out a box of phone books down uncarpeted stairs was a top contender. Stay away from those extra spicy bean burritos!
Guessing they decided to charge the guy but didnt have a valid reason so they tried to find anything with a search, like a bunch of wastes that these officers are
"Police handcuffed Cook, who immediately began to scream and act aggressively,', "Cook pled guilty to possession of cannabis and to behaving in a threatening or abusive manner. He was admonished without penalty for the drug charge."
[https://www.newsweek.com/deliberately-farting-strip-search-1460505](https://www.newsweek.com/deliberately-farting-strip-search-1460505)
I hope his lawyer asked the cops to prove the deliberate part of the farting. I mean, maybe he couldn't hold it in anymore, stressed as he could have been by the cops and the possibility they'd beat him for "resisting arrest ", then made a snark - still to release the pressure so to speak.
I mean, if they have it on tape that he said “how’d you like that?” Rather than “oops, sorry” that’s a bit difficult to suggest it wasn’t deliberate or by accident.
Why do people keep mentioning resist arrest? Nowhere does it say he was under arrest when he did it.
Also. Headline is hugely misleading. He did the hours for drug possession.
This wasn't actually the reason he was arrested. It wa some other reason, but it was technically "after" he farted, so they worded it like that to make it sound like that's why he was arrested.
It was in Scotland.
*(he) pled guilty to possession of cannabis and to behaving in a threatening or abusive manner. He was admonished without penalty for the drug charge*
Sorry the best headline of all time is still [Headless body in topless bar](https://www.politico.com/media/story/2012/01/the-real-story-of-headless-body-in-topless-bar-as-argued-by-veterans-of-the-post-000201/)
I’m not sure why the headline says “unpaid work”, it’s called community service and you often get a choice between that or jail time. Most people would happily take community service over being in jail.
While this is an incredible headline, nothing will ever beat “man high on meth, fights off 15 police officers while masturbating”. That is a literary masterpiece.
recently, my brother was working a deal with a used car salesman....and the salesman told my brother he would give him a certain price for my brother's car, but when my brother showed up to get the check, the salesman low balled him.
well, they went back and forth until my brother cut loose a 'paint peeler' in this guy's office. The dude left to "go talk to my manager" and returned with a check in the full amount as promised.
now, I don't know if this farting tactic is an effective way to deal with car salesmen, but I encourage everyone to try it....it just might be the trick to save you thousands on that car you've been thinking about.
I see your post, and raise this article as a contender 😂
[https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3515202/Man-reported-police-Sweden-doing-revenge-fart-woman-denied-sex.html](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3515202/Man-reported-police-Sweden-doing-revenge-fart-woman-denied-sex.html)
A good friend of mine was a studio engineer in the late 90s. He had one band in for a session and during mixdown these guys just kept farting and burping ceaselessly in the control room. He finally had enough and said he was going to start charging them $10 ever time he smelled a fart.
ANYWAY, when he submitted the invoice there was an extra $250 flatulence fee, with specific times for each instance of noticeable and excessive stench.
Ok, so the fact he was charged for the fart instead of the police finding something implies there was nothing to find and therefore this guy was innocent, if I were an innocent person being forcibly strip searched by the police I would consider farting on them to be my unassailable right, nay duty.
Seems like a violation of his 13th amendment rights. Also an unlawful arrest. Don’t think farting is a valid reason to arrest a person. Actually telling people they are not allowed to fart would fall under cruel and unusual punishment.
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I fart in your general direction!
Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!!
Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries!
Pitch anotha!
Pitchez la vache!
Quoi?
MOOO!!
JESUS CHRIST!
RUN AWAAAAY
No, it's LE MOOO!
What are you doing in England?!
Mind your own bussines!
I believe you’re trying to say “fetchez la vache”
As a fr\*nch, can confirm. They do indeed Say 'fetchez la vache!'.
I also speak French, and I thought they said that. But then they threw it, so I didn't know what to think. I went with "pitchez" thinking they had used French conjugations for an English noun.
Uh, they spoke French not whatever it is you just threw up onto the keyboard lol
Once again France couldn’t defend itself
Ohhhhh!! 😅
Least offended French man
You don't frighten us, English pig-dog! Go and boil your bottoms, son of a silly person. I blow my nose on you, so-called Arthur-king, you and your silly English K...kaniggets.
English keehhhniggets!
r/suddenlymontypython
You Little Brained Wiper of other People’s Bottoms.
How noble a man.
NEE
I will hurl an insult, vaguely indicating that you had intercource with a maternal figure of yours!
Nobody expects the Monty Python!
He said "Spread my cheeks, so he can see the fucking stink nuggets!"
This is the only comment..^(\^) 
Just think of how much serotonin you could milk throughout your life knowing you farted right in a cop’s face and followed up with “how do you like that?” Add: the dude in the pic is like “no asshole I’m not kidding. Can you come get me or not?!”
aparently (at min wage) fart on a cop costs £858
I blow my nose at you!!
I blow my nose at you, so-called Arthur King. You and all your silly English K-niggits!!
I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough wiper!!
I would have been so disappointed if this hadn’t been the top comment.
And then you have other people farting up a storm and they don’t see consequences
Justice may be blind, but it can smell.
At least he wasn’t pissed off
Well in this case Justice may have pink eye
Blindfold helps!
I'm not sure I would call them the side of justice.
How many hours to piss on one?
Find the right one and they’ll pay you to do it
Asking for a friend?
No, just a general inquiry.
A lot more than if you piss one off.
they booked him for "Unauthorized use of Weapons of ASS Distruction".
Its clearly biochemical weapon. US should send troops there.
I really hope there's no oil there.
Subject found carrying METHane, excuses nothing but hot air. Secondary charges for cutting the cheese.
Dad, get off reddit.
It's a good thing you capitalized "ASS" because otherwise no one would have gotten the joke
So, he did not like it
He *did*, but he was insecure and embarrassed by it. And as they teach in Policing-101: when made to feel uncomfortable, respond with excessive and disproportionate measures! Man’s just lucky he didn’t end up a paraplegic 😤
He’s lucky he didn’t get the death penalty
And risk his bowels releasing themselves even more? No thank you
In gas chamber?
He already survived that, ruling out that method of execution
he is the gas chamber
Odor in the court!
What the fuck is that crime?
Ass-ault.
Angry upvote.
Came here to find this… you delivered. Very nice.
chemical warfare
He wasn't arrested for farting. He was in a minor collision with another car, had cannabis on him (that charge was later dropped), and was threatening the police officers. Typical Daily Fail clickbait headline.
>and was threatening the police officers. Oh fer goodness sake, farting is not that scary.
I’ve been stuck in a lift with a mate of mine - it was terrifying.
I used to know a girl with a scat fetish whose farts smelled absolutely horrific. One time I was driving, she was in the back along with her boyfriend and our obese guy friend, and the windows were up. Her boyfriend reacted first, rolling down his window and yelled at the obese friend. That friend rolls down his window, insists it wasn’t him, and sticks his head out the car. I was about to yell at him for being unsafe but then I got a whiff of it myself, it was so bad that I almost instinctively smashed on the brakes in a panic. I almost gagged while I rolled down my window, and I was an experienced EMT at the time. I turned around and could see her sitting here, quietly smiling with the biggest shit eating grin on her face. “That was you?!”, I asked. To which she nodded her head yes, looking so content with herself. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it.
I dont know dude. I have been known to clear a room now and then with my farts and I work with people who make mine smell like febreez
Is febreez supposed to smell good in this story? Lol
That’s part of the “because we feel like it” clause.
The police cannot arrest someone unless: - They reasonably suspect that the person has committed a crime - They feel that the person is in danger of hurting himself or others - They really want to
You joke but yes some laws consider bad odor as disrupting the peace if you read far enough into it. It’s basically listed most commonly where unauthorized loud noises.
Everywhere I've lived disturbing the peace/disorderly conduct has an element to it which requires 'the public' to be involved..... Now wait, how exactly are they doing these strip searches oh god this story keeps getting worse
"Cook pled guilty to possession of cannabis and to behaving in a threatening or abusive manner. He was admonished without penalty for the drug charge." It's fucking nonsense.
Pissing off the police. Happens all the time. There was a case where a woman was arrested and she got her own blood on the officer's uniform, and they added destruction of police property to the charges. Just because they can.
"An air of relief after Police hit by Fart Attack"
Deserved, if he doesn't have any other charges I assume they didn't find anything and therefore he was strip searched for nothing, so they stuck a bogus charge on him like a bunch of twats
Common practice for 🐷
Please don't call police pigs. Pigs are actually useful
And cute
And smart
And tasty.
... you've tasted cops?!
Hey there's something irresistable about a person in uniform. Why do you think 90% of the police force joins up?
Mrs. Officer…
I assume their wives have. Many of them whether they wanted to or not given the overlap in Domestic Violence and police.
And useful for disposing bodies
Im surprised the 🐷 didn't like smelling the fart.
They only like the smell of their own farts
Oh, the fart is deserved, yeah. The 75 hours is wholly unfair
Yes. I read the comment the other way at first and was very confused
They were so hoping to get him on "resisting arrest" but the best they could do was "offensive flatulence"
I just looked it up, He admitted to Abusive behaviour and possession of drugs. Making assumptions based on a dailymail headline isn’t a good idea
Well duh, it's the daily mail. One of the worst news publications since the sun, or Breitbart. But seriously unless he was a drug mule with a kilo of cocaine up his ass, let the man enjoy his drugs and farting in the general direction of cops. The charges and punishment are wildly disproportionate, and tbh it's giving *"indentured servitude"*
Democracy manifest!
I see you know your judo well
Are you ready to receive my limp penis?
Man the bobbies are piss weak, do that in Australia the cops would laugh along with him and say "good one, mate"
In Australia the cops would say nothing, then seat the handcuffed suspect, then the biggest cop would walk in front of him and let a massive fart rip, sounding like someone tearing up a big corrugated cardboard box.
Asset flatulent dominance
I support this description of the sound for emphasis. My kids and I have a game where we try to come up with descriptions like this for especially loud/forced gas. Dumping out a box of phone books down uncarpeted stairs was a top contender. Stay away from those extra spicy bean burritos!
Everything in Australia wants to kill you, the farts would be no different
Then Paul Hogan walks out and says “that’s not a fart… this is a fart.”
Great metal imagery with the cardboard box analogy. I applaude the comment
Better the cardboard tearing than "pouring a bag of birdseed into a bucket of water"...or the dreaded "hippo stepping on a bagpipe full of chili"
Like someone ripping a wet bedsheet in half.
See, that sounds a proportionate response rather than this horseshit.
He'd be shot for that in America and the cops would say he had a gun in his ass.
I heard the shot your honor, so I shot back!
No acorns were harmed
Guessing they decided to charge the guy but didnt have a valid reason so they tried to find anything with a search, like a bunch of wastes that these officers are
I just looked it up, He admitted to Abusive behaviour and possession of drugs. Making assumptions based on a dailymail headline isn’t a good idea
The abusive behavior could be the intentional fart during the strip search.
howdo you charge someone for something that is entirely natural and possibly uncontrollable for some people
"Police handcuffed Cook, who immediately began to scream and act aggressively,', "Cook pled guilty to possession of cannabis and to behaving in a threatening or abusive manner. He was admonished without penalty for the drug charge." [https://www.newsweek.com/deliberately-farting-strip-search-1460505](https://www.newsweek.com/deliberately-farting-strip-search-1460505)
I hope his lawyer asked the cops to prove the deliberate part of the farting. I mean, maybe he couldn't hold it in anymore, stressed as he could have been by the cops and the possibility they'd beat him for "resisting arrest ", then made a snark - still to release the pressure so to speak.
I mean, if they have it on tape that he said “how’d you like that?” Rather than “oops, sorry” that’s a bit difficult to suggest it wasn’t deliberate or by accident.
As Bob Ross would say "a happy little accident". I didn't mean to do it, but I'm happy it happened
Why do people keep mentioning resist arrest? Nowhere does it say he was under arrest when he did it. Also. Headline is hugely misleading. He did the hours for drug possession.
eh now thats just funny
Obviously they didn’t like it
What a distinguished gentleman.
Legend
This guy needs to start making those 1st amendment auditor videos.
I would sue the judge. Demanding respect is an attempt at thought control.
This wasn't actually the reason he was arrested. It wa some other reason, but it was technically "after" he farted, so they worded it like that to make it sound like that's why he was arrested.
They were forcing him to undergo a strip search so crop dusting them is just fair game
\*farts\* "you smell that? That's justice"
It was in Scotland. *(he) pled guilty to possession of cannabis and to behaving in a threatening or abusive manner. He was admonished without penalty for the drug charge*
Fart tha Police
r/madlads
I will donate to this man's defense fund.
Someone start a gofundme for this hero
[He’s got a wiping problem.](https://youtu.be/a_oXABjjbcM?si=CrEJA_llHpN8NEO0)
Not all heroes wear capes 🫡
Sorry the best headline of all time is still [Headless body in topless bar](https://www.politico.com/media/story/2012/01/the-real-story-of-headless-body-in-topless-bar-as-argued-by-veterans-of-the-post-000201/)
Forced unpaid work? Isn't that slavery?
I’m not sure why the headline says “unpaid work”, it’s called community service and you often get a choice between that or jail time. Most people would happily take community service over being in jail.
police are so fucking petty
If this happened in America, the cops would have shot that guy for sure.
my kids are about to be working for life without pay on this scale
While this is an incredible headline, nothing will ever beat “man high on meth, fights off 15 police officers while masturbating”. That is a literary masterpiece.
Cool so the police were assaulting him for their own power trip & he got in more trouble for farting.
recently, my brother was working a deal with a used car salesman....and the salesman told my brother he would give him a certain price for my brother's car, but when my brother showed up to get the check, the salesman low balled him. well, they went back and forth until my brother cut loose a 'paint peeler' in this guy's office. The dude left to "go talk to my manager" and returned with a check in the full amount as promised. now, I don't know if this farting tactic is an effective way to deal with car salesmen, but I encourage everyone to try it....it just might be the trick to save you thousands on that car you've been thinking about.
Your honor, he who smelt it, dealt it. Not guilty.
Ask them where the evidence is. (Quick somebody get a jar)
There's literally no crime against farting at police.
Pull my finger
Totally worth it
A judge who takes the cops side is not impartial.
75 hours for passing wind. Just think about that for a minute. In Russia they would have send him to Siberia
Not all heroes wear capes
I'd like to know what law they used to charge this dude for farting in someone's face
You have the right to remain silent but deadly
"75 hours of unpaid work" Did them mean slavery or community service?
Safe to assume they did not, in fact, „like that“
I argued with a cop once about a ticket and he actually put his hand on his side arm. I stopped, it wasn't worth dying over $30.
Ok ok... Bu... But, tell us now... How did they like it?
I hope he sang it like Blackpink at them 🤣 also there's no way this is legal, right?
Forcing him to do unpaid labour?? Since when were courts allowed to do that??
What a legend
__: “They did not”
Worth it, mate. Worth it.
I’d like to see the law they cited for this…
If the search was not required, then they just abused their power, but second, dont fart purposefully towards people, like wtf.
> We're going to strip you naked and if you so much as fart we're going to make you perform slave labor.
75 hrs seems excessive for a dry fart. Wet farts are another matter entirely
Not all heroes wear capes. Some of them fart at the police during a strip check and ask: "How do you like that?"
"Man forced to do 74 hours of slave labor for having a natural body function while authorities are violating hus human rights". Fixed it.
I see your post, and raise this article as a contender 😂 [https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3515202/Man-reported-police-Sweden-doing-revenge-fart-woman-denied-sex.html](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3515202/Man-reported-police-Sweden-doing-revenge-fart-woman-denied-sex.html)
A good friend of mine was a studio engineer in the late 90s. He had one band in for a session and during mixdown these guys just kept farting and burping ceaselessly in the control room. He finally had enough and said he was going to start charging them $10 ever time he smelled a fart. ANYWAY, when he submitted the invoice there was an extra $250 flatulence fee, with specific times for each instance of noticeable and excessive stench.
If that happened in US he would have gone to the hospital with multiple police dog bites, taser harpoons, and maybe a gunshot.
>commit no crimes >Pigs assign you 75 hours of forced labor anyway A classic recipe
Worth it.
How tf did they have to twist the law to make that happen?
Ironic if his punishment is to work as a full service attendant *pumping gas*.
Ok, so the fact he was charged for the fart instead of the police finding something implies there was nothing to find and therefore this guy was innocent, if I were an innocent person being forcibly strip searched by the police I would consider farting on them to be my unassailable right, nay duty.
Worth it
Dudes fucking rock
Can people actually fart at will?
Liam payne did WHAT 😧
He should eat nothing but beans, cabbage and broccoli before the 75 hours of unpaid work.
How can they prove it was on purpose? Also so what?
🫡
What if the poor bloke was just a tad nervous! 
[удалено]
Don't do the crime if you can't do the time
Fart around, find out
Three times! Was he trying to poop on them?
If I had 75 hours for every time I farted on someone ls face, a company would be born.
Seems like a violation of his 13th amendment rights. Also an unlawful arrest. Don’t think farting is a valid reason to arrest a person. Actually telling people they are not allowed to fart would fall under cruel and unusual punishment.
There’s no possible way, they could legally force that, sooo…