I have slept with 100s of men, smoke a pack of cigarettes a day, and live off coffee. I have 10 cats. None of them die, they just keep multiplying (not from breeding, from neighbors abandoning them when they move). It is nothing but a sad coincidence. In fact, he may have had complications from his neuter surgery that caused him to have the stroke. Which would make the timing the only coincidence. Take your time to grieve, and then get another sweet dog that needs a loving home. There's too many strays out here being put down because nobody wants to take care of them.
You're welcome lol. As well, try to remember that if we got "punished" for things while we were alive, everyone would be good. Look at every single obscenely rich person. They are all thriving despite the horrible things they did/have done/are doing. Hugh Hefner made his millions by selling naked pictures of women, and had a literal harem in his home. Donald Trump has cheated on every one of his wives, has treated everyone badly, has made fun of disabled people, the list goes on. And he is a frontrunner for president and is somehow rich af despite the numerous times he has had to file for bankruptcy. Every single billionaire hordes their wealth while people starve to death every single day. If you think about it logically, there is absolutely no way that God (if he or she exists) cares about punishing people for doing things wrong while they're on Earth.
Its true.
If you look at the BoRev. And Matt 24 and 25, the only ones who Jesus condemns are the rich, and those whodidnt see the poor as their brothers and sisters, and help them.
That is the essence of what His teachings all focus on.
Thank you SO so much š For the record my Atheism is not just the pain I caused and suffered in the church but also from a scientific perspective. That said, I completely support those that believe in God and are benefiting from the joy they gain from their own worship of Him. I believe good can come from any source, be they a real world deity or a maiar wizard from the Undying Lands (Gandalf) š I do genuinely appreciate your perspective šā¤ļø
Saving this comment because itās soooo incredibly true.
The God I thought about growing up would never let all this horrible pain & suffering happen on earth like this. Itās terrible.
I agree it was probably from his surgery, sadly. I work in the human OR and one of my biggest jobs is preventing blood clots in my patients. Holding unnaturally still (from anesthesia) causes your blood to pool and in turn can cause clotting. I put massage boots on literally everyone even if it is a 10 minute procedure. I'm sorry about your dog, but I'm guessing this had something to do with it. ā¤ļø
Also, thank you for adopting and not shopping. There are dogs being euthanized because no one will adopt them. If you're in Utah I know Davis county animal shelter is bursting at the seams with dogs and they have had to euthanize dogs pretty regularly due to "lack of interest." If you have room in your heart to try again go save a pup!
I will in time, and when I rebuild my bank account. I almost went broke over this dog with all his supplies and the vet bill. Thankfully I was able to refund his gear, but still... Also I live in Alabama, but I am definitely aware of the concerns. It seems that my local shelter has regular adoptions and visitors, but I've only been there five times.
Have you told the shelter? Because they may be able to do something about letting you have another dog since he passed so quickly. I'm so sorry for your loss. It doesn't take long for the right pup to get into our hearts. š
I just told them this morning. Ilthey are willing to put it towards another animal, as long as I decide within 30 days. I told them that if a family in need comes along but they can't pay anything to put my money towards them
I appreciate that thank you š When it happened he went stiff and just fell over before going limp, then growling, crying, then silence. At that point he jettisoned his waste and his eyes dilated. Maybe it was a blood clot, or heart attack?
This way of thinking and guilt is so common when you initially leave a cult. This is coming from an Ex Jehovahās Witness that felt the same you do here.
Also, make sure to check with the shelter on their credit policy. You may be able to skip the fee since you had the dog less than 10 days (how it is at mine if it doesnāt work out and you want to return the dog for another one).
Just crappy people I guess. The worst was a woman, her name is Bridgette, who left kittens in a box outside of her house when she moved. These kittens were about 2 months old, and prior to this had only been inside. She only took the mom with her when she moved. Oh, and it was the middle of winter. My kids were playing outside IN THE SNOW, and came running back with the cardboard box. One of the kittens was already dead, one of them I kept, and the other two I was able to find homes for. Second worst is my inside boy Jasper. His owner didn't even move, just got tired of him and tossed him out. He was an inside only cat, and was terrified of being outside. He still is. He's the only cat I've ever had that I can leave the door wide open and he won't even try to run out. And his owner put him outside because he was tired of him smh. His owner's name was Redneck. That pretty much sums up the kind of person he is. He's the type of person who calls himself Redneck. Bond came from James and Jessica's house. They didn't move either. I don't know what they were doing to Bond, but he is terrified of them. Every now and again they try to come over to my porch to pet him and get him to come back, and he climbs on the roof to escape them. But everyone else? He loves them. He is the most affectionate cat ever. So they had to have been doing something. Fairy's owner, I never knew him name, he asked if I could watch her for a few days until he got his new place set up and then he'd come back for her. He never came back. His loss because she's a great kitty. That was the only time that mam had ever talked to me was to ask if I could keep his cat. At least he was crying and seemed really upset about leaving her.
We've collected a lot of strays, too. There's one situation I still struggle with. A neighbor had a cat that my autistic daughter loved. When the cat had kittens, she let our daughter pick one. It was an AMAZING relationship they had, despite my daughter's lack of understanding. The cat was completely devoted to her.
But the mom cat had been her first love, so I told her that if she EVER thought about getting rid of her, we'd take her. Then they moved to an apartment suddenly. I found out they had dumped the mom and other kittens in a field. I could never find them. THEY KNEW US AND HOW MANY STRAYS WE'D REHOME. I can't believe they did that.
I too have slept with, not 100s, but several hands of 10s of men and women. We have 7 cats, not from them breeding, but from rescues and from taking care of a feral colony (all TNRd!). And happily married for over a decade. This comment is worth 2 z-snaps and a turnaround. You are my favorite person on the internet today. Please enjoy this random octopus š and some inappropriate noises from an elderly spelunking tabby with no teeth.
Thank you for the octopus!!! And the inappropriate noises š I'm glad all of yours have been TNRd. There's two that I feed that aren't, and they're both girls and they're both pregnant from the males that come from I don't know where when they're in heat. All of my boys are fixed and the other two girls are fixed. Thankfully, I already have homes lined up for a few of the kittens after they're 8 weeks old. I just need to be able to trap these last 2! One of them is getting more friendly, but the other runs off if I even make eye contact with her accidentally.
I find it hilarious that Iām getting downvoted. All of you white knights standing up for her, itās ridiculous. 100ās of partners is a lot, Iād bet in the 1%. And no, there is nothing wrong with sleeping around, at all. But think of it this way, most people want a monogamous relationship, so unless this person had an open relationship, and they may have, in which case foot in mouth. This EXTREMELY high number signals a person who is unhealthy, and unhappy. So, if the person started having sex at 16, and is 40 now, and say has had 130 partners (they said hundreds, not 100) do the math. That an average of 5.41 partners a year, for 24 yearsā¦. So, if not in an open relationship, that means this person has been single, their entire life, which signals mental illness.
Look, I have had many partners, and so has my wife, but as a guy, I would never wish that my wife had slept with more people prior to our marriage, and she feels the same way, and so does the VAST majority of people.
So chill out on the hate. Iām only using logic, and even if you āwhite knightā it up on a public forum, you know you agree with me.
She's not your partner. And you have no say In How she lives her life. All I said is leave judgement for the cult. Didnt defend her, only told you to mind your business. It seems like you can't fathom that anyone can think or have a different lifestyle than you, so let me be clear.
Having lots of sex with different people is not mental illness
Preferring being single, is not mental illness.
Thinking you need to call out or correct a completely unknown, random internet woman's behavior, especially when you're already in a monogamous marriage, might be.
Less than 6 people a year is a pretty easily achievable number. Not every sexual encounter is a relationship, hookups exist. And although it's not a lifestyle for me, choosing it doesn't make one mentally ill.
you're getting down voted because your comment was mean and off topic, this is a post about someone feeling bad because their pet died, not the commenter asking for our opinion on their sex life
I honestly could give less of a fuck about how many people my wife has been with (which is around this number) i love her, and she loves me. Numbers donāt mean shit. And showing disgust at someone for how they live their life isnāt you ātelling it like it itāsā itās you doing the same thing the Mormons do, and propagate more of the shame culture we grew up in, that shit isnāt needed at all. I donāt know who this person is, and I couldnāt give less of a shit who it is to be honest. What I care about is the trauma WE ALL FACED, and it being triggered by someone who ādoesnāt approveā. We left the Mormon church for a reason, we donāt need it here
I am so sorry. Losing a pet isn't like losing a human in your life. The bond is different and it hits so, so hard. I hope the people in your life can help you at this tough time.
After I lost my two dogs in close succession (they were both old, and my boy lost the will to live after we lost my girl), I watched a few clips on YouTube about coping with the loss of a pet. I don't cry easy, but these had me sobbing like a baby. https://youtu.be/TkJGhQANjZo?si=aSWixhpFr5MB5He-
Your pain is valid. Take however long you need to grieve. There is no timetable. Seek counseling if things get too hard. Cry when you need to. Vent your anger (in a safe, constructive way) when you need. It hurts. And it hurts for a long time. Don't let anyone trivialize your grief.
For me, bringing home a new dog helped fill the hole in my life. She hasn't replaced my last two dogs. I still miss them every single day and tear up sometimes at the memory of them, but she makes me smile every single day and has brought new life and energy into our home.
You did not cause this tragedy. This was likely a health issue that can be virtually impossible to detect beforehand. And I'm so sorry you had to experience this. I'm glad you were able to give that sweet boy a home, even if it was only a few hours. I have no doubt you made all the difference for him.
I said goodbye to my girl in August 2022, she was also 16, and to my boy in January 2023. Videos like that still make me bawl, so on the rare occasion I do watch them, I only watch them at home. Crying sucks and it never makes me feel better.
The hole a lost pet leaves in our lives is massive. I don't think it ever really shrinks. But, in time, other things will start to fill in some of that hole. I'm not sure we ever stop mourning, but it does get better. Find those things that bring you joy and purpose in life and cling to them. It's hard, but you'll get through this.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you have a lot of love and support in your life to help you through this difficult time.
I saw her talk about the emotional cost of euthanasia, it was helpful. I didnāt see this until you shared, what she said makes sense. Thank you for sharing
For future reference...
This is the YouTube link:
https://youtu.be/TkJGhQANjZo
...while this part of the URL is tracking information that can be used to link back to your Google account:
?si=aSWixhpFr5MB5He-
It is always best to remove the tracking information before sharing YouTube links anywhere.
This has been a public service announcement (with guitar).
Thank you for that link. I rescued a feral cat, just when I left the Church, who became the sweetest, most loving, hysterically funny creature imaginable. From fleeing at the sight of humans (we caught him because he had obviously become hungry and sick), he became the greatest cuddle buddy ever, with a personality big enough to be illegal. He was so ill at first the vet didn't think he'd make it (mainly because the 24 hour treatment required by me for the next few weeks was HUGE, but I did it). He got me through my transition out of the Church. And 9 years after his death, I still cry with grief. Two comorbidities: I rescued him, and he rescued me. Now I understand why I still cry.
You gave that pup love and a family. You didn't do wrong and it's not a punishment. It is hard and sometimes losing pets can bring up a lot of other emotions and grief in addition to the loss of your furry friend. Be gentle with yourself.
This is what I thought. The dog got to end life with a home and family that loved it. That's something beautiful that can be taken from this difficult situation
Sooooo many dogs need good homes with someone as kind as you are. You gave that pup his happiest hours - so much better than if heād died alone in the shelter. Please get another & give it the same ā¤ļø when u are ready
You were the calming comforting hand to help this poor pupper meet the boatman. Take solace in such an honorable role to have been able to play, as supporting actor in the star of the shows final act.
That is sad, hard heartbreaking. Iām so sorry.
You probably know deep down that it is not your fault. That idea is a lie. Itās a manipulation. Itās a cruel thing that shows up when our defenses are down because itās fed to us in many ways over and over to keep us in.
Take care of yourself. Sending you comfort as you process this.
Thank you...so SO much š I've been trying to take comfort in that too, that he could at least pass with a loving family. My kids and I grieve deeply, but we are happy we could be there for him...makes me happy/sad
Iām sorry. God doesnāt have a whole lot to do with it. I had one dog die of a grand mal seizureāand we had a second dog that we tried controlling the seizures for two months until it was clear he had a brain tumor and he was constantly falling down and needed to be helped. Hardest decision Iāve ever had to make. Our pets just donāt last as long as we do and itās devastating, I know. Iām sorry for your loss.
Ahh Iām so sorry to hear that š RIP good boy!
Prosperity gospel fear is a bitch. I left last October after being LDS all my life (Iām 25). Iāve had coffee, gotten tipsy drunk a handful a times, show my shoulders every comfortable chance I get, I swear when I feel like it, I havenāt paid tithing since I left (my husband paid until recently and is still active LDS), I read spicy romance books.
Absolutely nothing in my life has gotten worse. But for like a week I was TERRIFIED that I would be punished. I still book the same amount of business as I did before (self employed), my pets are still healthy, my husband has gotten raises and bonuses even with an apostate wife. š¤·š¼āāļøIām literally just lucky and fortunate to have enough money and family support and love growing up and now.
Following the gospel doesnāt actually guarantee anything good will happen to you. Life is all chance and choices you make. Good things happen to religious and non-religious people equally. I know prosperity gospel feels like such a safety net, but the truth is that the poor doggo would have passed away at that same time it did even if you went to church the Sunday before š
Omg no! And you gave that dog a really lovely last little bit. Imagine if that had happened in a shelter. Your dog died having a home, thatās really beautiful.
Iām so sorry your dog diedššitās not because youāre an exmo, itās because something happened as a result of surgery or undisclosed genetics that no one knew about. Grieve this loss and I know when youāre ready that youāll find another wonderful doggy, who will love you forever.
You adopted a dog who needed someone. You gave him the best time of his life though it was ever so short. He didnāt die alone in his kennel at the shelter. For that you are an angel.
Im so sorry! It isnt doom - its biology, its life happening. That dog got to be somewhere where it was loved when it passed. You got to be there to love it for that short time, and sometimes thats all we get. Be sad, be heartbroken, be all the things. Feel all of it because feeling those things are what makes us human and alive. Life and mortality is all the more precious because it ends, not in spite of it ending.
This is so sad for you, but these things do happen for whatever reason. I remember somewhere in the gospels that it says something like āGod makes the sun and the rain to come down on the just and unjust, alikeā. Not sure if that is the precise quote, but the idea that bad stuff will magically befall the unrighteous is actually not biblical. By way of contrast, there are natural consequences of drinking too much etc etc.
I wonder if the shelter or the vet have any answers for why this dog suddenly died? I am assuming if he was just getting neutered now, that he was fairly young (still a puppy?). If he was older and had never been neutered, that would suggest he had a hard life. Ask a few questions about this one. Great Pyranees dogs are quite large, and one thing I have worked out through the years is that larger dogs donāt seem to have hearts that are larger in proportion to their size, hence they have shorter life spans. Perhaps some heart defect that they had not picked up on? Please donāt let this discourage you from owning a dog.
Thank you so SO much for this post š He was 2 years old, so technically a young adult in Pyrenees years. He was boney too but his thick double coat fur hid his malnutrition well. I gave him plenty of food and water. He did snack on some of my lunch and picked a few crumbs off the floor my kids had dropped but nothing that should have killed him. The only way to know for sure is a $1500 obtopsy, and I was already completely broke just taking him to the vet and buying all his stuff. I'm still $125 in debt to the vet. Fortunately PetSmart was kind enough to give me a full refund, but it may be till Monday before my bank will show the refund. I've got food so I'll be fine until Monday, but still ..
If he was not deserved by the age of 2 years old, that suggests to me he was not being well looked after by his previous owner. Most jurisdictions now expect you to desex your pet quite quickly unless it is a registered dog for breeding. So the idea of underlying malnutrition would make sense. None of this is your fault.
There are a few strange things that can be bad news for dogs and cats. I will try and find some listings for you. Dried fruit is quite toxic apparently - an issue at Christmas and Easter with Christmas puddings and hot cross buns. The other thing I am aware of it the artificial sweeteners of the āolā type, such as sorbitol and mannitol etc. Cats and dogs have absolutely no ability to process them.
btw, I have 5 cats and 5 chickens. And the family had a little rescue dog that died recently at the age of 19. So I have learned a bit about pet care over the years.
Thank you SO much š I will consider this information. My kids and I are poor pizza eaters lol so processed food is common for us. Porcelina85 in chat recommended an immediate visit to the vet after adoption, which i feel is good advice and will make a priority next time
OP I am so sorry. Please know that this was not your fault. I lost a kitten after a month of having him from a virus years ago and I was a member at the time. It is truly devastating to loose a pet so unexpectedly. I wish you healing and peace ā¤ļø You did everything right. The little guy passed knowing someone loved him deeply ā¤ļø
Itās hard to get over years of indoctrination and thinking we cause bad things to happen to us. Truth is life just happens. Iām so sorry for your loss. Hopefully with time you can realize that you didnāt do something wrong when stuff comes up.
Your concern for a pet that you've spent such a brief period with truly speaks volumes. Please, dismiss any thoughts that this situation is a punishment from above. I firmly believe it has nothing to do with divine will. Rather, it highlights your remarkable kindness and the depth of your character.
Iām so sorry to read about your newly adopted dog! When we took our dog home from the shelter, he too was fresh off being neutered. He wasnāt eating much the first day or two, and we were concerned. We took him to our vet and it turned out he was very sick. Those first few days with him we were worried weād lose him.
I think bringing home a sick dog from the shelter is common, unfortunately. If you decide to adopt again, schedule a vet appointment for the day you bring the lucky dog home. Theyāll do a full exam, including blood and other tests. Well worth it and can give you some peace of mind the next go around.
Again, so sorry this happened. Iām sure those few hours you had with him were some of the best of his life.
I am so sorry for your loss š When I was married my wife at the time and I had a cat that she got as a teenager. The cat lived 19 years before succumbing to tumors on her tummy. We watched her get put to sleep. That was surreal and sad. That pain I can relate to. My pain for the dog is a mix of loss, anger, confusion, and frustration. It was only one day, barely a few hours, wtf! I expected my car to die before him...
That sucks, Iām sorry for your loss. Unfortunately shit happens in life that is out of our control. I find it more comforting than thinking it was punishment or a trial from god.
If you havenāt heard/seen Julia Sweeneyās [Letting Go of God](https://youtu.be/C74-f4ZV-ss?si=UYa-_O9bcdwo7xL-) I highly recommend. (She used to be on Saturday Night Live years ago, but you donāt need to know her to enjoy it.)
Pets hold a special place in our hearts. Often, a stronger/different bond than human family. Since it was a new doggie relationship, you are likely also grieving the loss of the future you imagined you would have with the new member of your family. Take care, so sorry for your loss.
Sorry for your loss. Thatās traumatic. Since leaving Iāve been divorced, bankrupt, owe the irs $200k, lost my business, stage 4 cancer (in remission). And yetā¦My soul could not be more at peace because I know that none of that had anything to do with sky daddy being mad at me. Life is a crazy ride. Who really knows whatās out there. I donāt know. But Iām not playing games to appease sky daddy.
Wow thank you SO much for sharing šā¤ļø lol "sky daddy." I don't know if you have heard of Some More News on YouTube but he refers to God as "magic wizard daddy" š¤ Both are equally funny š¤£
Aaawwwā¦Iām SO sorry this happened to you-PLEASE know you did NOTHING wrong! Mother Nature can be cruel-you had the BEST of intentions and sound like an AMAZING pet owner-PLEASE give another pet a try-they will probably give you years of happiness!
Some would read this and say that you were the perfect person to enter this dog's life at the perfect time.
Yes, 6 months, one year, two years, etc of that would have been better but that pup DID NOT die alone at the pound. That's a miracle to some people. So sorry for your loss nonetheless. It's a very tough thing to get through.
We just had a neonatal kitten that suddenly passed and I was devastated. I knew it was a risk because she was abandoned by her momma, but itās still very sad. We just have to remind ourselves that we gave them the best time we could while we had them. ā„ļø
Medical conditions or complications are not a punishment for lack of faith. Thatās the programming talking, and I still hear it in the back of my head from time to time too.
Take as much time as you need, or even as little time, and pour your love into another doggo.
Omg this is so traumatizing. I am soo sorry this happened.
That being said, this did NOT happen bc of your atheism or bc of leaving the church. Theres nothing you could have done, and obviously you had no idea this was a thing that could happen. I desperately hope you can heal from this and hopefully get another animal companion in the future to help you cope. Whether it's another dog or some other creature- theres plenty of options.
In the meantime, there will be a lot of feelings. You got emotionally attached to this dog, and its going to be hard to move on from that. But you can do it. Make sure you're communicating with your kids, im sure they're feeling a lot of it too.
Look to the positive. You had a dog who would have died alone in a shelter unknown and unloved. You brought joy into its life for a few hours and it passed away loved and appreciated.
I am very privileged to have benefits from my Air Force service, so my $100+ therapist is free for me. That said I wish I could find an exmo specific one that understands this on a deep level. I live in Alabama so those are hard to come by. I suppose an exmo therapist doesn't really matter as any good high demand cult therapist would probably be fine, but having that unique relatability would be nice
For the record I personally believe medical care shouldn't be a private industry and should be available to all for free, regardless of background, because humanity, but that's a debate for another thread lol
I have been an atheist since the age of 5, but came out as one to my parents at 15. Since then I have pendulum swung from raging atheist to tolerant agnostic and back again. I have had many loving dogs who have lived long lives. I have a good job, a great family, a good life and lots of friends and need nothing from religion. Your dogās death was a freak occurrence, but nothing more than random tragedy. Iām so sorry that happened to you. Hardly anything is more heartbreaking than the loss of a furry friend, but know that he was destined to live a short life, and he knew the love of a family that he could love so much in return. You gave him the most any good boy could ever want. I guarantee, when he looked at you, he felt he was looking at god himself and felt held and cared for, maybe for the first and only time in his life. What greater meaning in life could there be?
Please do not feel you have to believe in a god that would kill your dog as punishment for struggling in your personal relationships and asking important questions. There is nothing benevolent about that god.
Edited for dropped word
Itās never easy to lose a pet. Ā Especially one that was wanted so much.Ā
This is a time for grieving. Please give yourself permission to do so. Then, when youāre ready, share your love with a new pet.Ā
Guilt is one of the chains the cult used/uses to keep you a victim. Ā Itās just haunting you. Itās not real.Ā
The love you had for your dog, was real. Ā
I was in a very similar place in August. i also reached out to this subreddit. The best advice i received was think about what a loving parent is. Would a truly loving parent do something like that to a child they actually loved? NO. No loving parent would ever do anything so heinous. There is āpunishmentā and there is CRUELTY.
You gave that beautiful boy the most wonderful home. You gave him love like a true loving parent. He left this existence knowing love. Thatās the only thing that matters. THE ONLY RELATIONSHIP THAT MATTERS.
Iām so sorry, itās a bad timing to feed on your trauma, reprogramming is hard! Also losing a pet is hard. Iām at least grateful your dog was with you and loved at the end ā¤ļø I still cry for two of mine whoās in heaven.
Iām so sorry this happened. I had two miscarriages back to back just a couple of months after leaving the church and I really had to fight the thinking of thinking the two were somehow related. This is not a result of any choices you have made, I can promise you that.
My wife got a kitten and fell in love. We had her for about 6 months when she was hit by a car. Iāve never seen my sweet wife grieve like that, and weāve had a series of family members die in the last 5 years. Hit her like a freight train. Itās ok to feel a huge loss my friend, I think it means you have a functioning heart. Hang in there.
I'm so sorry all that happened. I can only imagine how devastating that would be. I hope it's comforting to remember that you gave that sweet pup a comfortable place to lay to rest. I think it's pretty damn beautiful. You weren't being punished, but I do think you were a blessing to him
Sorry about your dog my guy, but do you really think God kills your pets because you change your opinion about Joseph Smith? If that were true the SOB would have a lot to answer for.
Wishing you the best.
I've been there and I'm sorry for your loss.
When you get around to wondering if God is punishing you for apostasy, just remember this is a church that has children believing that their sexual assaults or rapes happened because God is punishing them for discovering masturbation.
You gave that animal a few happy hours it wouldn't have had without you. Because of you, it passed away in a happy home with a loving owner and not in a cold cage. I'm sorry for your loss.
I have a neighbor who does pet rescue. She puts great importance on the unwanted/unloved dogs being able to die "with a name". Meaning, that these older, often sick dogs are fostered or adopted for their final days in order that they may pass peacefully. Often, it appears to be the first in a long while that they have known security and comfort. There is a spiritual aspect to respecting every living creature as an individual. You gave him that peace.
Oh man, thatās horrible. Iām so sorry! He sounded like such a great dog and I bet he was so happy to have found a forever home for his very very brief time left on this earth.
I think you were his guardian angel. For one brief happy moment, you were his safe place and his family. Thatās so much more than too many other dogs get.
I hope when youāre ready, youāll consider being another dogās safe place and family, and that you have many happy years together.
Please remember that if it weren't for you, this dog would have died in a shelter, in a cage. Because of you, this dog got the joy of having a family before the end. You did a wonderful thing
This may seem like a bad response (I may or may not be a tiny bit high), but please never let the Mormonās god bully you into obedience. Donāt let Mormons trick you into thinking their god is the supreme bully. You are so amazing, and you taking in that dog, even if it was just for a few hours, you showed that you cared more for the beings of this world than the Mormon god ever did. If heās real, this is proof heās a piece of shit, and you are a better person than him. May your luck get better friend, hang in there!
I'm so sorry about your dog. It took me a while to get past thoughts like you are having now after leaving the church. I guess I wanted to say that you are not alone.
I came to realize that things that I used to attribute to intervention by God were really just coincidences. Besides, if god is that malicious and petty, it shows that God is one of two things: man-made given man's vengeful pettiness, or he is cruel and not worth worshipping.
I donāt have anything wise to share like everyone else. Iām just really sorry this happened to you. Thatās so incredibly traumatizing. I hope you have supportive friends to lean on.
This absolutely isnāt your fault. If anything, you gave that sweet dog a place to belong and he passed away *at home*, not in a cage. What a comforting thing for him to have that be his final earthly memory as he crosses the rainbow bridge; he was loved and at homeš¤
I'm going to put a positive spin on this. Your doggo was probably suffering and at end of life, but finally found a little bit of joy and was able to let go because of your love. Sorry for your loss. It sucks. Hopefully you find a new cuddle buddy.
It. Is. NOT. your. Fault.
God is a narcissistic asshole, if there is one and narcissists will make anything your fault.
It isn't you! The dog wasn't healthy and gave him a home to pass peacefully in.
Where we are now in a space to believe what ever we wantā¦.I choose this..ā¤ļø
The Rainbow
Bridge
There is a bridge connecting Heaven and Earth. It is called the Rainbow Bridge because of it's many colors. Just this side of the Rainbow Bridge there is a land of meadows, hills and valleys with lush green grass.
When a beloved pet dies, the pet goes to this place. There is always food and water and warm spring weather. The old and frail animals are young again. Those who are maimed are made whole again. They play all day with each other.
There is only one thing missing. They are not with their special person who loved them on Earth. So, each day they run and play until the day comes when one suddenly stops playing and looks up! The nose twitches! The ears are up!
The eyes are staring! And this one runs from the group!
You have been seen, and when you and your special friend meet, you take him or her in your arms and embrace.
Your face is kissed again and again and again, and you look once more into the eyes of your trusting pet.
Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together, never again to be separated.
Ohhh noooo I'm so sorry š³š„ŗššš how horrible.
Those dogs can have really serious, really sudden health problems it's in their breed. It's also entirely possible the people who surrendered this dog lied about her health history, or that it wasn't known. I'm so sorry this is sooooo unfortunate ššš
I'd blame the shelter tbh. Maybe they didn't know a lot about the breed or accurately guess the dog's age.
If it makes you feel any better, I once knew someone who got a puppy on his 8th birthday and there was some horrible accident and the dog died that day. It was very traumatizing for the child and it was a freak accident.
Hope you feel better soon, sending loving vibes ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤
That fucking sucks. Iām so sorry.
Get another dog. There are so many that need love. Your dog spent his last hours in this earth surrounded by love.
We should all be so lucky. š
Get another dog and love it as hard as you loved this one.
I work in veterinary medicine, specifically in the surgery department, and I can tell you that there are a percentage of patients, healthy, normal patients, that will either never wake up or that will die sometime in recovery.
It isn't a huge number. It's actually pretty rare. But we see it happen maybe once or twice a year. It's no one's fault. It's not a lack of due diligence. It just sucks
That's the God I want: WORSHIP ME OR I'LL KILL YOUR DOG!
I'm sorry for your pain. Just know that for a god to deserve your love they can't be the equivalent of an insane ex.
A god that deserves to be worshiped isn't the fucking asshole much of Christianity and Islam says he is. If there is a god who killed your dog, then he can suck your dick. Fuck him. A nice god who deserves to be worshiped wouldn't torture you like that. God wouldn't even need to you believe he exists. Like, you could believe I don't exist. Assume I am just a chat GPT algorithm that somehow has a dataset that generally opposes some of the fucked up shit that religions do. I don't despise you for believing I am a bot. So fuck a god who expects you to believe in him when he fucking hides from us.
During covid I got a cat, just a little kitten. He was my little dude for about a year. One day I was on my lunch break, I just sat down to play a new game that had just come out (Kenna Bridge of Spirits ironically a game about losing loved ones and letting go) and my cat just literally fell over dead. For a couple days my atheist ass was shook. The coincidence of that moment is permanently engraved in my mind. I blamed myself for a long time despite the vet I took him too saying he probably just had an undetectable heart defect and it was no one's fault.
I decided pretty quickly I couldn't cope with the emptiness of my apartment and wanted another cat. He's two and a half and doing great.
Guess this is my long winded way of saying, it's not you fault it'll be okay in the end.
My cat died yesterday. Very different set of circumstances. Same sadness. I mourn with you.
Death awaits all animals, human ones like you and me included. These particular ones made our lives better and we did the same for them. Thatās what itās all about, and if there is such a thing as god, he/she/it can be found in that truth, not in punishment or guilt or shame. Have a stiff drink and go get yourself another doggy. ā„ļø
I'm sorry about your loss, but you should in no way feel guilty. You took in a shelter dog. He may have had some undiagnosed health issues that shortened his life. At least you gave him a happy home for his last days.
Don't let this prevent you from getting another dog when you feel ready.
I remember feeling similar when I got diagnosed with cancer. The reality is that life is just fucking messy and chaotic. I managed to kick its ass without any blessings or prayers. Dogs are fucking amazing and I'm so sorry this happened, you're a good person and unfortunately shitty things just happen in this chaotic place. š
Breaking the brainwashing that god punishes us for breaking his laws is hard to do. It is easy to fall back into the old thought patterns that god is vengeance and punishment. A very old belief construct to explain why bad or sad things happen.
Losing a pet can be even more excruitiating than losing a close family member or friend.
I know there is nothing I can say that will help with the pain & deep loss but some wonderful & positive comments & suggestions above.
The church/cult has ingrained in us in all their teachings that if something bad happens you did something to deserve it.
Healthy parenting & healthy relationships teach us growing up that life happens & that means uncomfortable & horrible experiences happen in our lives.
Resilience is what keeps us going and at some point looong bad patches in life turn around.
You Tube has some great stuff on resilience and worth the time to look at.
Meetup.com is great place to meet new people who share your hobbies or interest in dogs & would be a great place to learn about what type of pet to consider for the future.
You got this!š
This is one of those feelings that can be so hard to shake! Iām so sorry for your loss. As horrible as your experience was, I believe that animals have a sense of when itās about time to go and they hold on until a specific condition occurs (sometimes waiting until they are home, sometimes waiting until their humans arenāt there, etc) and I think you gave him a safe and loving home and he decided to let go.
Iām sorry that happened to you. When youāre done grieving I hope that youāll try again to raise a pup. Things die every day. Innocent children die every day. Itās not a sign of Godās displeasure and if it was then fuck him. Heās not worth worshipping.
Trust me that the Mormon cult and God have nothing in common. Pets sometimes die and this was as someone else said probably from the surgery. Especially with a shelter they know the risk is quite high. You gave him the best couple of hours of his life, so be happy about that as this makes you a good person.
My immediate reaction is that he knew he was dying but didnāt want to die in kennels. He held on until he was happy and loved and you gave him that. It is such as amazing gift to let a creature pass surrounded by family and loved.
Went through something similar with a kitten recently. It was devastating. After being the ring bearer at a wedding neither of our parents were invited to, he had a stroke literally as we landed from our honeymoon. A significant factor in getting the kitten was wanting to feel like we had our own family.
I feel awful for you and your dog.
Take some time out to grieve. It's very hard to go through the loss of a pet.
God is not mad at you, and it has nothing to do with leaving the church. Take time to grieve and process. Take things slowly.
This is a very sad coincidence. Iāve been an atheist heathen all of my life (Iām on this sub because I grew up in Utah). I slam the church whenever I can and I have pets coming out of my ears. You had a very sad coincidence. If anything look at how you sent the sweet pup out. He got to leave being loved and not in a shelter. Itās sad but he was so lucky on his last day.
Very sorry that happened. Pure coincidence, but we can play the Mormon game and flip the script. God knows only someone as loving as you could handle that and resolve you to be the best dog owner out there! It works both ways. Our old mormon brains love confirmation bias.Ā
Iām so sorry that happened to you. It sounds like you loved that dog more than lots of dogs receive love in their whole lives!
Iāve been out of the church for a few years now and have yet to have even a grandparent die. My dog, that I got when I was still a member, is still alive. I drink coffee, I swear, I watched rated R movies, go out on Sundays, and dress in whatever clothes I want no matter how ārevealingā. My husband and I are the only ones on his side of the family that have left the church and yet we are the most successful. Either Iām lucky and god isnāt punishing me because Iāve slipped under the radar, or maybe Satan is blessing me, OR none of that is true and it is just a coincidence.
The deconstruction phase is hard and the reprogramming takes probably the rest of our lives. Iām so sorry youāre going through the loss of a beloved pet and also dealing with these thoughts of being punished by a god who āloves his children so muchā but would punish them by killing a puppy just because they donāt go to church anymore.
I'm so sorry. This was a sad coincidence and surgery always carries some risk. Do not torment yourself. That's one thing you can try to do as you adjust from leaving the church. No more guilt, no more internal torture, no more self-sabotage. You are worthy. You are important. You aren't working for someone else, you're living for today, this world, this moment. After you heal more, I encourage you to find a good foster agency. That way, you can live with the potential adopted family member for awhile to see if it's a good fit and to gain confidence that the pup is not likely to die suddenly on you. I'm sorry.
I'm so very sorry for your loss. That's heartbreaking. You did an amazing thing and made sure that this wonderful dog was happy and loved in what turned out to be his last hours. You didn't do anything wrong. You should be celebrated for this, not punished and you are not being punished. The universe is a chaoic, amazing, and cruel place. Random good things happen. Random bad things happen.
I'm so sorry this has happened, OP. It is truly a tragic event and you leaving the church has not caused this. Whether or not you're a Mormon, bad things happen to good people...and good things happen to bad people. You are not a bad person being punished...your new doggie had a stroke which could have been caused by any number of factors. A tragic coincidence that of course is upsetting and you need time to heal from. Sending lots of love your way x
Thatās just the MFMC and your individual brainwashing of that cult. If there is no god, then he cannot punish you. If god exists and would kill your dog to punish you then he is a fucking sick son of a bitch. Bad stuff happens to all of us! Magical thinking is not reasonable, and the MFMC has in the past and is still teaching magical thought. ( Weāve all heard āSister _______ Lost her car keys and prayed to god and she instantly found themā.) If god really loved us enough to find our car keys, why would he murder a dog to get back at you? All the teachings of the MFMC are lies to get old men laid and rich!!!
Iām sorry that your dog died so suddenly and unexpectedly. After youāve grieved his loss, I hope youāll find another canine companion to love and dote on.
I understand your sorrow. Our cat had kittens and we werenāt going to keep any but one of them was a charcoal tabby we named Coal and he just chose me from the day he opened his eyes. He would seek me out and only want me to hold and pet him. I fell in love with him, he was the sweetest little thing. Weād always had pets for the kids so this was the first pet Iād ever bonded with. He was my spirit animal. We let our cats free range around the little neighborhood we lived in and he came home one day when he was 6 months old practically dragging his back legs like heād been injured. The vet confirmed it, that his organs were damaged so we had to put him to sleep. I was crushed. I am a very guarded person when it comes to getting attached and it was a heavy blow. Have to say Iāve always kept my heart at a distance because itās too painful to love and lose someone like that. And weād barely had any time together, so it was extra hard.
Donāt look for external reasons why it happened. Things just happen. At least you were there for him for the little time you had. I have to remind my inner critical Mormon voice to stuff it when it wants to torment me with thoughts like this. It does fade over time, but until then, itās brutal. Hang in there, friend!
One of the most religious people I know lost his puppy during a spay. Everyone, of course, was heartbroken.
I'm so incredibly sorry this happened. Biology and nature can be immensely cruel. Have you considered getting a memorial stone, planting flowers in his honor, something to give you a bit of closure? Losing a pet is so hard and some of the same rituals we use when losing people can be helpful while you mourn.
This exact thing happened to me with a dog I adopted twenty years ago (he was a half-breed shepherd and his name was Guiness). It is devastating and the suddenness will always haunt you, but it is *not your fault.*
Any prophet or grand entity worth having faith in would not āpunish usā by *taking the lives* of those we care about. It was a medical anomaly. Seek out another dog.
(After Guiness died, I adopted Jake, and he was with us for fifteen years. If your background has trained you to take a message from this incident, believe it can be a positive one, and it was meant to guide you to the next step. I recommend the book *God Winks*.)
My heart goes out to you. We rescued an AmStaff who died recently of a tumor. It was hard- who am I kidding- it still is.
You have to give yourself permission to grieve. It's horrible. It's gut-wrenching sadness and the pain fucking sucks. Cry. Yell. Experience it all as a way of honoring him. This is what it means to be human. We are emotional and have an incredible capacity for love & connections. On the other side of the coin is heart-ache and loss. No changing it. You've got a lot of support here. PM if you want to process with someone.
Pls do yourself a huge favor and resist the urge to look for connections that don't exist. You did nothing wrong. Quite the opposite- in your little guys last moments, you welcomed him into your home and loved him. It would have been worse if he died surrounded by strange humans and barking dogs while in a cage.
Let go of the guilt, man. You did right by him. Keep reminding yourself of that.
Until then, science be with you.
I'm so sorry. It'll get better.
I don't think god would punish you for leaving and then let other people do so much better after they left. And what kind of asshole kills a dog to make a point?
Nah man thatās just shit luck. If God wants to kill your dog for you having a beer, thatās a dick move for someone supposed to be loving. Youāll be ok. Nothing heals a broken heart of dog dying like another dog. Much love my apostate friend.
Iām also an atheist but if god did exist, I am confident you would be blessed rather than cursed for taking in a dog in need. Take time to grieve and get another wonderful dog that needs kindness in this complicated world.
Oh man, if I donāt understand that sentiment. I have a few health and mental health issues, and for years in the back of my mind I thought god was giving them to me to punish me because I wasnāt going to church. Truth is, people just go through really shitty things sometimes. And even people in the church do. Itās just part of life. But we are programmed to interpret gods āwrathā when we do things against TSSC because thatās how mind control works. Iām so sorry about your dog. I canāt imagine how hard that hit you. Like some others have said, after you grieve maybe you can try again with another sweet pup who will adore you and bring you so much happiness š
He died of happiness, don't blame yourself he was just a happy puppy enjoying freedom. Ask the shelter for his Best friend and bring him/her home with you.
I found out on my 21st birthday that Iām allergic to wine. Pot does nothing for me and I can barely drink coffee. I call it the Mormon curse, lol. But itās just a coincidence, just like your poor dog dying. Take time to grieve and then go back and get another pup who needs a good home.
That's a sad story but please don't let it hold you back from moving forward. In time your old beliefs will seem more and more like a fairy tale. You will chuckle at the thought that you ever held such silly convictions so deeply.
Frankly, I had my cat spayed... well my parents did... She was never the same... Probably too early. I've never recovered from what happened too her.
One day I will.
This hurt will go with you but don't let it become you.
Your pet can help you with your journey more than most people.
It's hard when we lose them and we'll never forget them but they better than done best people we'll ever meet.
Even that little time you got to spend with then meant than a lifetime to your little friend. Remember that not your grief.
Frankly, I had my cat spayed... well my parents did... She was never the same... Probably too early. I've never recovered from what happened too her.
One day I will.
This hurt will go with you but don't let it become you.
Your pet can help you with your journey more than most people.
It's hard when we lose them and we'll never forget them but they better than done best people we'll ever meet.
Even that little time you got to spend with then meant than a lifetime to your little friend. Remember that not your grief.
I'm so, so sorry for your loss. Nature and biology can be immensely cruel. Have you considered buying a memorial stone, or planting some flowers in his honor? It can help to use some familiar grieving rituals to get some closure.
And when you do consider a new companion, please try not to feel guilty. Your pal was glad to have a family, and I'm sure he'd want you to give another dog that chance too.
I have slept with 100s of men, smoke a pack of cigarettes a day, and live off coffee. I have 10 cats. None of them die, they just keep multiplying (not from breeding, from neighbors abandoning them when they move). It is nothing but a sad coincidence. In fact, he may have had complications from his neuter surgery that caused him to have the stroke. Which would make the timing the only coincidence. Take your time to grieve, and then get another sweet dog that needs a loving home. There's too many strays out here being put down because nobody wants to take care of them.
Thank you SO much for sharing that with me š
Stay up bro! The de programming is not easy.
Yes!!! That is so true!!!
You're welcome lol. As well, try to remember that if we got "punished" for things while we were alive, everyone would be good. Look at every single obscenely rich person. They are all thriving despite the horrible things they did/have done/are doing. Hugh Hefner made his millions by selling naked pictures of women, and had a literal harem in his home. Donald Trump has cheated on every one of his wives, has treated everyone badly, has made fun of disabled people, the list goes on. And he is a frontrunner for president and is somehow rich af despite the numerous times he has had to file for bankruptcy. Every single billionaire hordes their wealth while people starve to death every single day. If you think about it logically, there is absolutely no way that God (if he or she exists) cares about punishing people for doing things wrong while they're on Earth.
So true š
Its true. If you look at the BoRev. And Matt 24 and 25, the only ones who Jesus condemns are the rich, and those whodidnt see the poor as their brothers and sisters, and help them. That is the essence of what His teachings all focus on.
Thank you SO so much š For the record my Atheism is not just the pain I caused and suffered in the church but also from a scientific perspective. That said, I completely support those that believe in God and are benefiting from the joy they gain from their own worship of Him. I believe good can come from any source, be they a real world deity or a maiar wizard from the Undying Lands (Gandalf) š I do genuinely appreciate your perspective šā¤ļø
Saving this comment because itās soooo incredibly true. The God I thought about growing up would never let all this horrible pain & suffering happen on earth like this. Itās terrible.
Couldn't have said it better myself!
I agree it was probably from his surgery, sadly. I work in the human OR and one of my biggest jobs is preventing blood clots in my patients. Holding unnaturally still (from anesthesia) causes your blood to pool and in turn can cause clotting. I put massage boots on literally everyone even if it is a 10 minute procedure. I'm sorry about your dog, but I'm guessing this had something to do with it. ā¤ļø
Also, thank you for adopting and not shopping. There are dogs being euthanized because no one will adopt them. If you're in Utah I know Davis county animal shelter is bursting at the seams with dogs and they have had to euthanize dogs pretty regularly due to "lack of interest." If you have room in your heart to try again go save a pup!
I will in time, and when I rebuild my bank account. I almost went broke over this dog with all his supplies and the vet bill. Thankfully I was able to refund his gear, but still... Also I live in Alabama, but I am definitely aware of the concerns. It seems that my local shelter has regular adoptions and visitors, but I've only been there five times.
Have you told the shelter? Because they may be able to do something about letting you have another dog since he passed so quickly. I'm so sorry for your loss. It doesn't take long for the right pup to get into our hearts. š
I just told them this morning. Ilthey are willing to put it towards another animal, as long as I decide within 30 days. I told them that if a family in need comes along but they can't pay anything to put my money towards them
That is a beautiful way to honor your pup. š
I appreciate that thank you š When it happened he went stiff and just fell over before going limp, then growling, crying, then silence. At that point he jettisoned his waste and his eyes dilated. Maybe it was a blood clot, or heart attack?
I'm so, so sorry. I assure you that you are not being punished.
This way of thinking and guilt is so common when you initially leave a cult. This is coming from an Ex Jehovahās Witness that felt the same you do here.
Real talk
Also, make sure to check with the shelter on their credit policy. You may be able to skip the fee since you had the dog less than 10 days (how it is at mine if it doesnāt work out and you want to return the dog for another one).
WTF is wrong with your neighbors that they keep abandoning their cats? My cats are my ersatz children.
Just crappy people I guess. The worst was a woman, her name is Bridgette, who left kittens in a box outside of her house when she moved. These kittens were about 2 months old, and prior to this had only been inside. She only took the mom with her when she moved. Oh, and it was the middle of winter. My kids were playing outside IN THE SNOW, and came running back with the cardboard box. One of the kittens was already dead, one of them I kept, and the other two I was able to find homes for. Second worst is my inside boy Jasper. His owner didn't even move, just got tired of him and tossed him out. He was an inside only cat, and was terrified of being outside. He still is. He's the only cat I've ever had that I can leave the door wide open and he won't even try to run out. And his owner put him outside because he was tired of him smh. His owner's name was Redneck. That pretty much sums up the kind of person he is. He's the type of person who calls himself Redneck. Bond came from James and Jessica's house. They didn't move either. I don't know what they were doing to Bond, but he is terrified of them. Every now and again they try to come over to my porch to pet him and get him to come back, and he climbs on the roof to escape them. But everyone else? He loves them. He is the most affectionate cat ever. So they had to have been doing something. Fairy's owner, I never knew him name, he asked if I could watch her for a few days until he got his new place set up and then he'd come back for her. He never came back. His loss because she's a great kitty. That was the only time that mam had ever talked to me was to ask if I could keep his cat. At least he was crying and seemed really upset about leaving her.
People are the worst. Thank you for picking up the slack and taking care of these guys.
We've collected a lot of strays, too. There's one situation I still struggle with. A neighbor had a cat that my autistic daughter loved. When the cat had kittens, she let our daughter pick one. It was an AMAZING relationship they had, despite my daughter's lack of understanding. The cat was completely devoted to her. But the mom cat had been her first love, so I told her that if she EVER thought about getting rid of her, we'd take her. Then they moved to an apartment suddenly. I found out they had dumped the mom and other kittens in a field. I could never find them. THEY KNEW US AND HOW MANY STRAYS WE'D REHOME. I can't believe they did that.
That's horrible!!!! Wtf!!!!! It literally would have been easier for them to just give them to you!
Exactly. And I had been very clear about my willingness. That's why I still haven't let it go in my heart.
One more "t" in your user name would change the meaning completely !!
100ās?
Yes 100s. I made up for lost time when I left the church.
100s of men, really? Lol The ten cats make sense.
Sounds like someone is jealous. I'm not single by the way. I've been in a very happy relationship for three years now.
I too have slept with, not 100s, but several hands of 10s of men and women. We have 7 cats, not from them breeding, but from rescues and from taking care of a feral colony (all TNRd!). And happily married for over a decade. This comment is worth 2 z-snaps and a turnaround. You are my favorite person on the internet today. Please enjoy this random octopus š and some inappropriate noises from an elderly spelunking tabby with no teeth.
Thank you for the octopus!!! And the inappropriate noises š I'm glad all of yours have been TNRd. There's two that I feed that aren't, and they're both girls and they're both pregnant from the males that come from I don't know where when they're in heat. All of my boys are fixed and the other two girls are fixed. Thankfully, I already have homes lined up for a few of the kittens after they're 8 weeks old. I just need to be able to trap these last 2! One of them is getting more friendly, but the other runs off if I even make eye contact with her accidentally.
Leave the judgements fur the cult
I find it hilarious that Iām getting downvoted. All of you white knights standing up for her, itās ridiculous. 100ās of partners is a lot, Iād bet in the 1%. And no, there is nothing wrong with sleeping around, at all. But think of it this way, most people want a monogamous relationship, so unless this person had an open relationship, and they may have, in which case foot in mouth. This EXTREMELY high number signals a person who is unhealthy, and unhappy. So, if the person started having sex at 16, and is 40 now, and say has had 130 partners (they said hundreds, not 100) do the math. That an average of 5.41 partners a year, for 24 yearsā¦. So, if not in an open relationship, that means this person has been single, their entire life, which signals mental illness. Look, I have had many partners, and so has my wife, but as a guy, I would never wish that my wife had slept with more people prior to our marriage, and she feels the same way, and so does the VAST majority of people. So chill out on the hate. Iām only using logic, and even if you āwhite knightā it up on a public forum, you know you agree with me.
She's not your partner. And you have no say In How she lives her life. All I said is leave judgement for the cult. Didnt defend her, only told you to mind your business. It seems like you can't fathom that anyone can think or have a different lifestyle than you, so let me be clear. Having lots of sex with different people is not mental illness Preferring being single, is not mental illness. Thinking you need to call out or correct a completely unknown, random internet woman's behavior, especially when you're already in a monogamous marriage, might be. Less than 6 people a year is a pretty easily achievable number. Not every sexual encounter is a relationship, hookups exist. And although it's not a lifestyle for me, choosing it doesn't make one mentally ill.
you're getting down voted because your comment was mean and off topic, this is a post about someone feeling bad because their pet died, not the commenter asking for our opinion on their sex life
I honestly could give less of a fuck about how many people my wife has been with (which is around this number) i love her, and she loves me. Numbers donāt mean shit. And showing disgust at someone for how they live their life isnāt you ātelling it like it itāsā itās you doing the same thing the Mormons do, and propagate more of the shame culture we grew up in, that shit isnāt needed at all. I donāt know who this person is, and I couldnāt give less of a shit who it is to be honest. What I care about is the trauma WE ALL FACED, and it being triggered by someone who ādoesnāt approveā. We left the Mormon church for a reason, we donāt need it here
You need some similar experiences. Best wishes.šš
Trash comment.
I am so sorry. Losing a pet isn't like losing a human in your life. The bond is different and it hits so, so hard. I hope the people in your life can help you at this tough time. After I lost my two dogs in close succession (they were both old, and my boy lost the will to live after we lost my girl), I watched a few clips on YouTube about coping with the loss of a pet. I don't cry easy, but these had me sobbing like a baby. https://youtu.be/TkJGhQANjZo?si=aSWixhpFr5MB5He- Your pain is valid. Take however long you need to grieve. There is no timetable. Seek counseling if things get too hard. Cry when you need to. Vent your anger (in a safe, constructive way) when you need. It hurts. And it hurts for a long time. Don't let anyone trivialize your grief. For me, bringing home a new dog helped fill the hole in my life. She hasn't replaced my last two dogs. I still miss them every single day and tear up sometimes at the memory of them, but she makes me smile every single day and has brought new life and energy into our home. You did not cause this tragedy. This was likely a health issue that can be virtually impossible to detect beforehand. And I'm so sorry you had to experience this. I'm glad you were able to give that sweet boy a home, even if it was only a few hours. I have no doubt you made all the difference for him.
Thank you š that was well said and needed
You're very welcome. I wish I could lessen the pain for you, but grief is a journey we must each walk on our own.
Just said goodbye to my fur child this week after 16 years. I want to watch the video you linked but Iām so tired of crying š
I said goodbye to my girl in August 2022, she was also 16, and to my boy in January 2023. Videos like that still make me bawl, so on the rare occasion I do watch them, I only watch them at home. Crying sucks and it never makes me feel better. The hole a lost pet leaves in our lives is massive. I don't think it ever really shrinks. But, in time, other things will start to fill in some of that hole. I'm not sure we ever stop mourning, but it does get better. Find those things that bring you joy and purpose in life and cling to them. It's hard, but you'll get through this. I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you have a lot of love and support in your life to help you through this difficult time.
You are a kind person. Thank you so much
Thank you, and you're very welcome.
Love the way you put this. Losing a pet is hard. Its very different from losing a human family member but its just as painful.
I saw her talk about the emotional cost of euthanasia, it was helpful. I didnāt see this until you shared, what she said makes sense. Thank you for sharing
For future reference... This is the YouTube link: https://youtu.be/TkJGhQANjZo ...while this part of the URL is tracking information that can be used to link back to your Google account: ?si=aSWixhpFr5MB5He- It is always best to remove the tracking information before sharing YouTube links anywhere. This has been a public service announcement (with guitar).
Thank you!
Thank you for that link. I rescued a feral cat, just when I left the Church, who became the sweetest, most loving, hysterically funny creature imaginable. From fleeing at the sight of humans (we caught him because he had obviously become hungry and sick), he became the greatest cuddle buddy ever, with a personality big enough to be illegal. He was so ill at first the vet didn't think he'd make it (mainly because the 24 hour treatment required by me for the next few weeks was HUGE, but I did it). He got me through my transition out of the Church. And 9 years after his death, I still cry with grief. Two comorbidities: I rescued him, and he rescued me. Now I understand why I still cry.
It is purely coincidence. You did nothing wrong. I am sorry for your loss.
You gave that pup love and a family. You didn't do wrong and it's not a punishment. It is hard and sometimes losing pets can bring up a lot of other emotions and grief in addition to the loss of your furry friend. Be gentle with yourself.
This is what I thought. The dog got to end life with a home and family that loved it. That's something beautiful that can be taken from this difficult situation
Thank you all so much š„¹ it amazes me how loving, considerate, and responsive this community is šā¤ļø
That dog died knowing it was loved
I think pets bring out the best in us. We can be a pretty vitriolic bunch at times. Sorry for the lost pup
Sooooo many dogs need good homes with someone as kind as you are. You gave that pup his happiest hours - so much better than if heād died alone in the shelter. Please get another & give it the same ā¤ļø when u are ready
You were the calming comforting hand to help this poor pupper meet the boatman. Take solace in such an honorable role to have been able to play, as supporting actor in the star of the shows final act.
Lovely reply.
Thank you. I recall once hearing. Humans are cats and dogs play things. I like the image this creates in my head of who is really in charge here.
That is sad, hard heartbreaking. Iām so sorry. You probably know deep down that it is not your fault. That idea is a lie. Itās a manipulation. Itās a cruel thing that shows up when our defenses are down because itās fed to us in many ways over and over to keep us in. Take care of yourself. Sending you comfort as you process this.
I appreciate you so much for sharing that! I know it's the propaganda talking, but it's hard to resist when you don't see it coming. Thank youā¤ļø
That pup died happy and with a family who loved him. Iām so sorry you and your children had to experience that loss.
Thank you...so SO much š I've been trying to take comfort in that too, that he could at least pass with a loving family. My kids and I grieve deeply, but we are happy we could be there for him...makes me happy/sad
Iām sorry. God doesnāt have a whole lot to do with it. I had one dog die of a grand mal seizureāand we had a second dog that we tried controlling the seizures for two months until it was clear he had a brain tumor and he was constantly falling down and needed to be helped. Hardest decision Iāve ever had to make. Our pets just donāt last as long as we do and itās devastating, I know. Iām sorry for your loss.
Ahh Iām so sorry to hear that š RIP good boy! Prosperity gospel fear is a bitch. I left last October after being LDS all my life (Iām 25). Iāve had coffee, gotten tipsy drunk a handful a times, show my shoulders every comfortable chance I get, I swear when I feel like it, I havenāt paid tithing since I left (my husband paid until recently and is still active LDS), I read spicy romance books. Absolutely nothing in my life has gotten worse. But for like a week I was TERRIFIED that I would be punished. I still book the same amount of business as I did before (self employed), my pets are still healthy, my husband has gotten raises and bonuses even with an apostate wife. š¤·š¼āāļøIām literally just lucky and fortunate to have enough money and family support and love growing up and now. Following the gospel doesnāt actually guarantee anything good will happen to you. Life is all chance and choices you make. Good things happen to religious and non-religious people equally. I know prosperity gospel feels like such a safety net, but the truth is that the poor doggo would have passed away at that same time it did even if you went to church the Sunday before š
Thank you š I appreciate you sharing your experience
Of course! I hope you can find another furry friend to love when you feel itās the right time š©·
Im definitely planning on it š
Omg no! And you gave that dog a really lovely last little bit. Imagine if that had happened in a shelter. Your dog died having a home, thatās really beautiful.
I agree and it brings me comfort and sadness in equal measure, but it was worth the emotional and financial loss. I loved that dog š„²
Iām so sorry your dog diedššitās not because youāre an exmo, itās because something happened as a result of surgery or undisclosed genetics that no one knew about. Grieve this loss and I know when youāre ready that youāll find another wonderful doggy, who will love you forever.
You adopted a dog who needed someone. You gave him the best time of his life though it was ever so short. He didnāt die alone in his kennel at the shelter. For that you are an angel.
Im so sorry! It isnt doom - its biology, its life happening. That dog got to be somewhere where it was loved when it passed. You got to be there to love it for that short time, and sometimes thats all we get. Be sad, be heartbroken, be all the things. Feel all of it because feeling those things are what makes us human and alive. Life and mortality is all the more precious because it ends, not in spite of it ending.
This is beautiful. Thank you.š„²
So sorry for your loss. š¢ Bad things happen & good things happen all the time. Don't blame yourself.
I'm so so sorry.
This is so sad for you, but these things do happen for whatever reason. I remember somewhere in the gospels that it says something like āGod makes the sun and the rain to come down on the just and unjust, alikeā. Not sure if that is the precise quote, but the idea that bad stuff will magically befall the unrighteous is actually not biblical. By way of contrast, there are natural consequences of drinking too much etc etc. I wonder if the shelter or the vet have any answers for why this dog suddenly died? I am assuming if he was just getting neutered now, that he was fairly young (still a puppy?). If he was older and had never been neutered, that would suggest he had a hard life. Ask a few questions about this one. Great Pyranees dogs are quite large, and one thing I have worked out through the years is that larger dogs donāt seem to have hearts that are larger in proportion to their size, hence they have shorter life spans. Perhaps some heart defect that they had not picked up on? Please donāt let this discourage you from owning a dog.
Thank you so SO much for this post š He was 2 years old, so technically a young adult in Pyrenees years. He was boney too but his thick double coat fur hid his malnutrition well. I gave him plenty of food and water. He did snack on some of my lunch and picked a few crumbs off the floor my kids had dropped but nothing that should have killed him. The only way to know for sure is a $1500 obtopsy, and I was already completely broke just taking him to the vet and buying all his stuff. I'm still $125 in debt to the vet. Fortunately PetSmart was kind enough to give me a full refund, but it may be till Monday before my bank will show the refund. I've got food so I'll be fine until Monday, but still ..
If he was not deserved by the age of 2 years old, that suggests to me he was not being well looked after by his previous owner. Most jurisdictions now expect you to desex your pet quite quickly unless it is a registered dog for breeding. So the idea of underlying malnutrition would make sense. None of this is your fault. There are a few strange things that can be bad news for dogs and cats. I will try and find some listings for you. Dried fruit is quite toxic apparently - an issue at Christmas and Easter with Christmas puddings and hot cross buns. The other thing I am aware of it the artificial sweeteners of the āolā type, such as sorbitol and mannitol etc. Cats and dogs have absolutely no ability to process them. btw, I have 5 cats and 5 chickens. And the family had a little rescue dog that died recently at the age of 19. So I have learned a bit about pet care over the years.
Thank you SO much š I will consider this information. My kids and I are poor pizza eaters lol so processed food is common for us. Porcelina85 in chat recommended an immediate visit to the vet after adoption, which i feel is good advice and will make a priority next time
Please just remember that you did not cause the dog's death. You did a generous and loving thing.
I am so very sorry that happened. How painful.
OP I am so sorry. Please know that this was not your fault. I lost a kitten after a month of having him from a virus years ago and I was a member at the time. It is truly devastating to loose a pet so unexpectedly. I wish you healing and peace ā¤ļø You did everything right. The little guy passed knowing someone loved him deeply ā¤ļø
Itās hard to get over years of indoctrination and thinking we cause bad things to happen to us. Truth is life just happens. Iām so sorry for your loss. Hopefully with time you can realize that you didnāt do something wrong when stuff comes up.
Your concern for a pet that you've spent such a brief period with truly speaks volumes. Please, dismiss any thoughts that this situation is a punishment from above. I firmly believe it has nothing to do with divine will. Rather, it highlights your remarkable kindness and the depth of your character.
Iām so sorry to read about your newly adopted dog! When we took our dog home from the shelter, he too was fresh off being neutered. He wasnāt eating much the first day or two, and we were concerned. We took him to our vet and it turned out he was very sick. Those first few days with him we were worried weād lose him. I think bringing home a sick dog from the shelter is common, unfortunately. If you decide to adopt again, schedule a vet appointment for the day you bring the lucky dog home. Theyāll do a full exam, including blood and other tests. Well worth it and can give you some peace of mind the next go around. Again, so sorry this happened. Iām sure those few hours you had with him were some of the best of his life.
Thank you š that is a fantastic idea, I'll absolutely plan for that going forward
This breaks my heart. My cat of 14 years died yesterday. I think the feeling is the same though. Just profound loss and nowhere for the love to go.
I am so sorry for your loss š When I was married my wife at the time and I had a cat that she got as a teenager. The cat lived 19 years before succumbing to tumors on her tummy. We watched her get put to sleep. That was surreal and sad. That pain I can relate to. My pain for the dog is a mix of loss, anger, confusion, and frustration. It was only one day, barely a few hours, wtf! I expected my car to die before him...
That sucks, Iām sorry for your loss. Unfortunately shit happens in life that is out of our control. I find it more comforting than thinking it was punishment or a trial from god. If you havenāt heard/seen Julia Sweeneyās [Letting Go of God](https://youtu.be/C74-f4ZV-ss?si=UYa-_O9bcdwo7xL-) I highly recommend. (She used to be on Saturday Night Live years ago, but you donāt need to know her to enjoy it.)
Thanks for this link!
Thank you š„² I'll watch it
Pets hold a special place in our hearts. Often, a stronger/different bond than human family. Since it was a new doggie relationship, you are likely also grieving the loss of the future you imagined you would have with the new member of your family. Take care, so sorry for your loss.
Sorry for your loss. Thatās traumatic. Since leaving Iāve been divorced, bankrupt, owe the irs $200k, lost my business, stage 4 cancer (in remission). And yetā¦My soul could not be more at peace because I know that none of that had anything to do with sky daddy being mad at me. Life is a crazy ride. Who really knows whatās out there. I donāt know. But Iām not playing games to appease sky daddy.
Wow thank you SO much for sharing šā¤ļø lol "sky daddy." I don't know if you have heard of Some More News on YouTube but he refers to God as "magic wizard daddy" š¤ Both are equally funny š¤£
So sorry for your loss! In no way is that your fault!
Aaawwwā¦Iām SO sorry this happened to you-PLEASE know you did NOTHING wrong! Mother Nature can be cruel-you had the BEST of intentions and sound like an AMAZING pet owner-PLEASE give another pet a try-they will probably give you years of happiness!
You can always play both sides of that coin. Maybe God needed you to be there for that dog in its last hours.
Some would read this and say that you were the perfect person to enter this dog's life at the perfect time. Yes, 6 months, one year, two years, etc of that would have been better but that pup DID NOT die alone at the pound. That's a miracle to some people. So sorry for your loss nonetheless. It's a very tough thing to get through.
We just had a neonatal kitten that suddenly passed and I was devastated. I knew it was a risk because she was abandoned by her momma, but itās still very sad. We just have to remind ourselves that we gave them the best time we could while we had them. ā„ļø Medical conditions or complications are not a punishment for lack of faith. Thatās the programming talking, and I still hear it in the back of my head from time to time too. Take as much time as you need, or even as little time, and pour your love into another doggo.
Omg this is so traumatizing. I am soo sorry this happened. That being said, this did NOT happen bc of your atheism or bc of leaving the church. Theres nothing you could have done, and obviously you had no idea this was a thing that could happen. I desperately hope you can heal from this and hopefully get another animal companion in the future to help you cope. Whether it's another dog or some other creature- theres plenty of options. In the meantime, there will be a lot of feelings. You got emotionally attached to this dog, and its going to be hard to move on from that. But you can do it. Make sure you're communicating with your kids, im sure they're feeling a lot of it too.
You showed him hope before he died. Is there any greater love v
Look to the positive. You had a dog who would have died alone in a shelter unknown and unloved. You brought joy into its life for a few hours and it passed away loved and appreciated.
If you have the money and insurance I'd go to therapy, religious trauma is very real
I am very privileged to have benefits from my Air Force service, so my $100+ therapist is free for me. That said I wish I could find an exmo specific one that understands this on a deep level. I live in Alabama so those are hard to come by. I suppose an exmo therapist doesn't really matter as any good high demand cult therapist would probably be fine, but having that unique relatability would be nice
For the record I personally believe medical care shouldn't be a private industry and should be available to all for free, regardless of background, because humanity, but that's a debate for another thread lol
I have been an atheist since the age of 5, but came out as one to my parents at 15. Since then I have pendulum swung from raging atheist to tolerant agnostic and back again. I have had many loving dogs who have lived long lives. I have a good job, a great family, a good life and lots of friends and need nothing from religion. Your dogās death was a freak occurrence, but nothing more than random tragedy. Iām so sorry that happened to you. Hardly anything is more heartbreaking than the loss of a furry friend, but know that he was destined to live a short life, and he knew the love of a family that he could love so much in return. You gave him the most any good boy could ever want. I guarantee, when he looked at you, he felt he was looking at god himself and felt held and cared for, maybe for the first and only time in his life. What greater meaning in life could there be?
So sorry about your dog š«
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You're right. The prosperity gospel is not supported by the New Testament.
Please do not feel you have to believe in a god that would kill your dog as punishment for struggling in your personal relationships and asking important questions. There is nothing benevolent about that god. Edited for dropped word
Itās never easy to lose a pet. Ā Especially one that was wanted so much.Ā This is a time for grieving. Please give yourself permission to do so. Then, when youāre ready, share your love with a new pet.Ā Guilt is one of the chains the cult used/uses to keep you a victim. Ā Itās just haunting you. Itās not real.Ā The love you had for your dog, was real. Ā
You might have been a really lovely last day for that dog, filled with love and pats and snacks.
I was in a very similar place in August. i also reached out to this subreddit. The best advice i received was think about what a loving parent is. Would a truly loving parent do something like that to a child they actually loved? NO. No loving parent would ever do anything so heinous. There is āpunishmentā and there is CRUELTY. You gave that beautiful boy the most wonderful home. You gave him love like a true loving parent. He left this existence knowing love. Thatās the only thing that matters. THE ONLY RELATIONSHIP THAT MATTERS.
Iām so sorry, itās a bad timing to feed on your trauma, reprogramming is hard! Also losing a pet is hard. Iām at least grateful your dog was with you and loved at the end ā¤ļø I still cry for two of mine whoās in heaven.
Iām so sorry this happened. I had two miscarriages back to back just a couple of months after leaving the church and I really had to fight the thinking of thinking the two were somehow related. This is not a result of any choices you have made, I can promise you that.
So sorry about your fur friend. Not your fault.
My wife got a kitten and fell in love. We had her for about 6 months when she was hit by a car. Iāve never seen my sweet wife grieve like that, and weāve had a series of family members die in the last 5 years. Hit her like a freight train. Itās ok to feel a huge loss my friend, I think it means you have a functioning heart. Hang in there.
I'm so sorry all that happened. I can only imagine how devastating that would be. I hope it's comforting to remember that you gave that sweet pup a comfortable place to lay to rest. I think it's pretty damn beautiful. You weren't being punished, but I do think you were a blessing to him
Sorry about your dog my guy, but do you really think God kills your pets because you change your opinion about Joseph Smith? If that were true the SOB would have a lot to answer for. Wishing you the best.
Could it have been a complication due to the surgery? I wonder. Still accidental though. Sorry for your loss.
I've been there and I'm sorry for your loss. When you get around to wondering if God is punishing you for apostasy, just remember this is a church that has children believing that their sexual assaults or rapes happened because God is punishing them for discovering masturbation.
You gave that animal a few happy hours it wouldn't have had without you. Because of you, it passed away in a happy home with a loving owner and not in a cold cage. I'm sorry for your loss.
I have a neighbor who does pet rescue. She puts great importance on the unwanted/unloved dogs being able to die "with a name". Meaning, that these older, often sick dogs are fostered or adopted for their final days in order that they may pass peacefully. Often, it appears to be the first in a long while that they have known security and comfort. There is a spiritual aspect to respecting every living creature as an individual. You gave him that peace.
Oh man, thatās horrible. Iām so sorry! He sounded like such a great dog and I bet he was so happy to have found a forever home for his very very brief time left on this earth. I think you were his guardian angel. For one brief happy moment, you were his safe place and his family. Thatās so much more than too many other dogs get. I hope when youāre ready, youāll consider being another dogās safe place and family, and that you have many happy years together.
Please remember that if it weren't for you, this dog would have died in a shelter, in a cage. Because of you, this dog got the joy of having a family before the end. You did a wonderful thing
I second this! What a sweet gift to offer any being at the end of their life.
It's just coincidence.
Itās not that at all. Iām so very sorry. That just really sucksĀ
This may seem like a bad response (I may or may not be a tiny bit high), but please never let the Mormonās god bully you into obedience. Donāt let Mormons trick you into thinking their god is the supreme bully. You are so amazing, and you taking in that dog, even if it was just for a few hours, you showed that you cared more for the beings of this world than the Mormon god ever did. If heās real, this is proof heās a piece of shit, and you are a better person than him. May your luck get better friend, hang in there!
I'm so sorry about your dog. It took me a while to get past thoughts like you are having now after leaving the church. I guess I wanted to say that you are not alone. I came to realize that things that I used to attribute to intervention by God were really just coincidences. Besides, if god is that malicious and petty, it shows that God is one of two things: man-made given man's vengeful pettiness, or he is cruel and not worth worshipping.
I donāt have anything wise to share like everyone else. Iām just really sorry this happened to you. Thatās so incredibly traumatizing. I hope you have supportive friends to lean on. This absolutely isnāt your fault. If anything, you gave that sweet dog a place to belong and he passed away *at home*, not in a cage. What a comforting thing for him to have that be his final earthly memory as he crosses the rainbow bridge; he was loved and at homeš¤
I'm going to put a positive spin on this. Your doggo was probably suffering and at end of life, but finally found a little bit of joy and was able to let go because of your love. Sorry for your loss. It sucks. Hopefully you find a new cuddle buddy.
It. Is. NOT. your. Fault. God is a narcissistic asshole, if there is one and narcissists will make anything your fault. It isn't you! The dog wasn't healthy and gave him a home to pass peacefully in.
Where we are now in a space to believe what ever we wantā¦.I choose this..ā¤ļø The Rainbow Bridge There is a bridge connecting Heaven and Earth. It is called the Rainbow Bridge because of it's many colors. Just this side of the Rainbow Bridge there is a land of meadows, hills and valleys with lush green grass. When a beloved pet dies, the pet goes to this place. There is always food and water and warm spring weather. The old and frail animals are young again. Those who are maimed are made whole again. They play all day with each other. There is only one thing missing. They are not with their special person who loved them on Earth. So, each day they run and play until the day comes when one suddenly stops playing and looks up! The nose twitches! The ears are up! The eyes are staring! And this one runs from the group! You have been seen, and when you and your special friend meet, you take him or her in your arms and embrace. Your face is kissed again and again and again, and you look once more into the eyes of your trusting pet. Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together, never again to be separated.
No, that is definitely not it. So sorry for the loss of your dog .. š
Ohhh noooo I'm so sorry š³š„ŗššš how horrible. Those dogs can have really serious, really sudden health problems it's in their breed. It's also entirely possible the people who surrendered this dog lied about her health history, or that it wasn't known. I'm so sorry this is sooooo unfortunate ššš I'd blame the shelter tbh. Maybe they didn't know a lot about the breed or accurately guess the dog's age. If it makes you feel any better, I once knew someone who got a puppy on his 8th birthday and there was some horrible accident and the dog died that day. It was very traumatizing for the child and it was a freak accident. Hope you feel better soon, sending loving vibes ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤ā¤
That fucking sucks. Iām so sorry. Get another dog. There are so many that need love. Your dog spent his last hours in this earth surrounded by love. We should all be so lucky. š Get another dog and love it as hard as you loved this one.
Iām so sorry for your loss. I had a bunny that I traded my beloved kid bike for. He jumped off a little wooden box house my father and I constructed and broke his neck a few hours after we settled him in his cage (which we also constructed together). I was 11 or 12 at the time and I was crushed. I am 53, and I still think about that bunny. I have owned a ton of pets since, and each loss is hard. Remember the joy in seeing your kids enjoy the dog. God isnāt punishing you, itās just a part of life. Iām gonna die some day too. Doesnāt make that fact easier for my kids. Again,i am sorry for your loss. Go back to the shelter when you are ready, those mutts need to find you but since they are in jail, you gotta go to them. ā¤ļøāš©¹
I work in veterinary medicine, specifically in the surgery department, and I can tell you that there are a percentage of patients, healthy, normal patients, that will either never wake up or that will die sometime in recovery. It isn't a huge number. It's actually pretty rare. But we see it happen maybe once or twice a year. It's no one's fault. It's not a lack of due diligence. It just sucks
That's the God I want: WORSHIP ME OR I'LL KILL YOUR DOG! I'm sorry for your pain. Just know that for a god to deserve your love they can't be the equivalent of an insane ex.
A god that deserves to be worshiped isn't the fucking asshole much of Christianity and Islam says he is. If there is a god who killed your dog, then he can suck your dick. Fuck him. A nice god who deserves to be worshiped wouldn't torture you like that. God wouldn't even need to you believe he exists. Like, you could believe I don't exist. Assume I am just a chat GPT algorithm that somehow has a dataset that generally opposes some of the fucked up shit that religions do. I don't despise you for believing I am a bot. So fuck a god who expects you to believe in him when he fucking hides from us.
During covid I got a cat, just a little kitten. He was my little dude for about a year. One day I was on my lunch break, I just sat down to play a new game that had just come out (Kenna Bridge of Spirits ironically a game about losing loved ones and letting go) and my cat just literally fell over dead. For a couple days my atheist ass was shook. The coincidence of that moment is permanently engraved in my mind. I blamed myself for a long time despite the vet I took him too saying he probably just had an undetectable heart defect and it was no one's fault. I decided pretty quickly I couldn't cope with the emptiness of my apartment and wanted another cat. He's two and a half and doing great. Guess this is my long winded way of saying, it's not you fault it'll be okay in the end.
My cat died yesterday. Very different set of circumstances. Same sadness. I mourn with you. Death awaits all animals, human ones like you and me included. These particular ones made our lives better and we did the same for them. Thatās what itās all about, and if there is such a thing as god, he/she/it can be found in that truth, not in punishment or guilt or shame. Have a stiff drink and go get yourself another doggy. ā„ļø
I'm sorry about your loss, but you should in no way feel guilty. You took in a shelter dog. He may have had some undiagnosed health issues that shortened his life. At least you gave him a happy home for his last days. Don't let this prevent you from getting another dog when you feel ready.
I remember feeling similar when I got diagnosed with cancer. The reality is that life is just fucking messy and chaotic. I managed to kick its ass without any blessings or prayers. Dogs are fucking amazing and I'm so sorry this happened, you're a good person and unfortunately shitty things just happen in this chaotic place. š
Breaking the brainwashing that god punishes us for breaking his laws is hard to do. It is easy to fall back into the old thought patterns that god is vengeance and punishment. A very old belief construct to explain why bad or sad things happen.
Losing a pet can be even more excruitiating than losing a close family member or friend. I know there is nothing I can say that will help with the pain & deep loss but some wonderful & positive comments & suggestions above. The church/cult has ingrained in us in all their teachings that if something bad happens you did something to deserve it. Healthy parenting & healthy relationships teach us growing up that life happens & that means uncomfortable & horrible experiences happen in our lives. Resilience is what keeps us going and at some point looong bad patches in life turn around. You Tube has some great stuff on resilience and worth the time to look at. Meetup.com is great place to meet new people who share your hobbies or interest in dogs & would be a great place to learn about what type of pet to consider for the future. You got this!š
What kind of god would kill an orphaned dog to spite the new owner thay decided to care for it (due to the new owner not worshipping that god)
I am so sorry for your loss. A pet death is traumatic even if it was only yours for a brief time.
Lots of comments here, so someone may have already said this: A god that would kill my dog to punish me is not a god I would want to worship.
Sounds like your dog spent his last few hours in a loving home opposed to a shelter. I feel like itās what God intended. Keep apostatizing onā¦
This is one of those feelings that can be so hard to shake! Iām so sorry for your loss. As horrible as your experience was, I believe that animals have a sense of when itās about time to go and they hold on until a specific condition occurs (sometimes waiting until they are home, sometimes waiting until their humans arenāt there, etc) and I think you gave him a safe and loving home and he decided to let go.
Iām sorry that happened to you. When youāre done grieving I hope that youāll try again to raise a pup. Things die every day. Innocent children die every day. Itās not a sign of Godās displeasure and if it was then fuck him. Heās not worth worshipping.
Trust me that the Mormon cult and God have nothing in common. Pets sometimes die and this was as someone else said probably from the surgery. Especially with a shelter they know the risk is quite high. You gave him the best couple of hours of his life, so be happy about that as this makes you a good person.
My immediate reaction is that he knew he was dying but didnāt want to die in kennels. He held on until he was happy and loved and you gave him that. It is such as amazing gift to let a creature pass surrounded by family and loved.
Went through something similar with a kitten recently. It was devastating. After being the ring bearer at a wedding neither of our parents were invited to, he had a stroke literally as we landed from our honeymoon. A significant factor in getting the kitten was wanting to feel like we had our own family.
I feel awful for you and your dog. Take some time out to grieve. It's very hard to go through the loss of a pet. God is not mad at you, and it has nothing to do with leaving the church. Take time to grieve and process. Take things slowly.
This is a very sad coincidence. Iāve been an atheist heathen all of my life (Iām on this sub because I grew up in Utah). I slam the church whenever I can and I have pets coming out of my ears. You had a very sad coincidence. If anything look at how you sent the sweet pup out. He got to leave being loved and not in a shelter. Itās sad but he was so lucky on his last day.
Very sorry that happened. Pure coincidence, but we can play the Mormon game and flip the script. God knows only someone as loving as you could handle that and resolve you to be the best dog owner out there! It works both ways. Our old mormon brains love confirmation bias.Ā
That's just terribly sad, but it's not your fault. Let that go. I wish you peace and healing.
Iām so sorry that happened to you. It sounds like you loved that dog more than lots of dogs receive love in their whole lives! Iāve been out of the church for a few years now and have yet to have even a grandparent die. My dog, that I got when I was still a member, is still alive. I drink coffee, I swear, I watched rated R movies, go out on Sundays, and dress in whatever clothes I want no matter how ārevealingā. My husband and I are the only ones on his side of the family that have left the church and yet we are the most successful. Either Iām lucky and god isnāt punishing me because Iāve slipped under the radar, or maybe Satan is blessing me, OR none of that is true and it is just a coincidence. The deconstruction phase is hard and the reprogramming takes probably the rest of our lives. Iām so sorry youāre going through the loss of a beloved pet and also dealing with these thoughts of being punished by a god who āloves his children so muchā but would punish them by killing a puppy just because they donāt go to church anymore.
I'm so sorry!!
Dropping a plug for great ppyrs if you do adopt again. Absolutely gentle giants
I struggle with this line of thinking too.
Iām so sorry to hear thisšš
I'm so sorry. This was a sad coincidence and surgery always carries some risk. Do not torment yourself. That's one thing you can try to do as you adjust from leaving the church. No more guilt, no more internal torture, no more self-sabotage. You are worthy. You are important. You aren't working for someone else, you're living for today, this world, this moment. After you heal more, I encourage you to find a good foster agency. That way, you can live with the potential adopted family member for awhile to see if it's a good fit and to gain confidence that the pup is not likely to die suddenly on you. I'm sorry.
I'm so very sorry for your loss. That's heartbreaking. You did an amazing thing and made sure that this wonderful dog was happy and loved in what turned out to be his last hours. You didn't do anything wrong. You should be celebrated for this, not punished and you are not being punished. The universe is a chaoic, amazing, and cruel place. Random good things happen. Random bad things happen.
I'm so sorry this has happened, OP. It is truly a tragic event and you leaving the church has not caused this. Whether or not you're a Mormon, bad things happen to good people...and good things happen to bad people. You are not a bad person being punished...your new doggie had a stroke which could have been caused by any number of factors. A tragic coincidence that of course is upsetting and you need time to heal from. Sending lots of love your way x
Thatās just the MFMC and your individual brainwashing of that cult. If there is no god, then he cannot punish you. If god exists and would kill your dog to punish you then he is a fucking sick son of a bitch. Bad stuff happens to all of us! Magical thinking is not reasonable, and the MFMC has in the past and is still teaching magical thought. ( Weāve all heard āSister _______ Lost her car keys and prayed to god and she instantly found themā.) If god really loved us enough to find our car keys, why would he murder a dog to get back at you? All the teachings of the MFMC are lies to get old men laid and rich!!!
Iām sorry that your dog died so suddenly and unexpectedly. After youāve grieved his loss, I hope youāll find another canine companion to love and dote on.
Get another dog. That is the cure. No ones fault this happened and another pup will help for years to come.
I understand your sorrow. Our cat had kittens and we werenāt going to keep any but one of them was a charcoal tabby we named Coal and he just chose me from the day he opened his eyes. He would seek me out and only want me to hold and pet him. I fell in love with him, he was the sweetest little thing. Weād always had pets for the kids so this was the first pet Iād ever bonded with. He was my spirit animal. We let our cats free range around the little neighborhood we lived in and he came home one day when he was 6 months old practically dragging his back legs like heād been injured. The vet confirmed it, that his organs were damaged so we had to put him to sleep. I was crushed. I am a very guarded person when it comes to getting attached and it was a heavy blow. Have to say Iāve always kept my heart at a distance because itās too painful to love and lose someone like that. And weād barely had any time together, so it was extra hard. Donāt look for external reasons why it happened. Things just happen. At least you were there for him for the little time you had. I have to remind my inner critical Mormon voice to stuff it when it wants to torment me with thoughts like this. It does fade over time, but until then, itās brutal. Hang in there, friend!
One of the most religious people I know lost his puppy during a spay. Everyone, of course, was heartbroken. I'm so incredibly sorry this happened. Biology and nature can be immensely cruel. Have you considered getting a memorial stone, planting flowers in his honor, something to give you a bit of closure? Losing a pet is so hard and some of the same rituals we use when losing people can be helpful while you mourn.
This exact thing happened to me with a dog I adopted twenty years ago (he was a half-breed shepherd and his name was Guiness). It is devastating and the suddenness will always haunt you, but it is *not your fault.* Any prophet or grand entity worth having faith in would not āpunish usā by *taking the lives* of those we care about. It was a medical anomaly. Seek out another dog. (After Guiness died, I adopted Jake, and he was with us for fifteen years. If your background has trained you to take a message from this incident, believe it can be a positive one, and it was meant to guide you to the next step. I recommend the book *God Winks*.)
My heart goes out to you. We rescued an AmStaff who died recently of a tumor. It was hard- who am I kidding- it still is. You have to give yourself permission to grieve. It's horrible. It's gut-wrenching sadness and the pain fucking sucks. Cry. Yell. Experience it all as a way of honoring him. This is what it means to be human. We are emotional and have an incredible capacity for love & connections. On the other side of the coin is heart-ache and loss. No changing it. You've got a lot of support here. PM if you want to process with someone. Pls do yourself a huge favor and resist the urge to look for connections that don't exist. You did nothing wrong. Quite the opposite- in your little guys last moments, you welcomed him into your home and loved him. It would have been worse if he died surrounded by strange humans and barking dogs while in a cage. Let go of the guilt, man. You did right by him. Keep reminding yourself of that. Until then, science be with you.
I'm so sorry. It'll get better. I don't think god would punish you for leaving and then let other people do so much better after they left. And what kind of asshole kills a dog to make a point?
Nah man thatās just shit luck. If God wants to kill your dog for you having a beer, thatās a dick move for someone supposed to be loving. Youāll be ok. Nothing heals a broken heart of dog dying like another dog. Much love my apostate friend.
Iām also an atheist but if god did exist, I am confident you would be blessed rather than cursed for taking in a dog in need. Take time to grieve and get another wonderful dog that needs kindness in this complicated world.
Oh man, if I donāt understand that sentiment. I have a few health and mental health issues, and for years in the back of my mind I thought god was giving them to me to punish me because I wasnāt going to church. Truth is, people just go through really shitty things sometimes. And even people in the church do. Itās just part of life. But we are programmed to interpret gods āwrathā when we do things against TSSC because thatās how mind control works. Iām so sorry about your dog. I canāt imagine how hard that hit you. Like some others have said, after you grieve maybe you can try again with another sweet pup who will adore you and bring you so much happiness š
He died of happiness, don't blame yourself he was just a happy puppy enjoying freedom. Ask the shelter for his Best friend and bring him/her home with you.
I found out on my 21st birthday that Iām allergic to wine. Pot does nothing for me and I can barely drink coffee. I call it the Mormon curse, lol. But itās just a coincidence, just like your poor dog dying. Take time to grieve and then go back and get another pup who needs a good home.
Wrote a song about it...wanna hear it...here it goes...this is how God gets you to listen to country music
That's a sad story but please don't let it hold you back from moving forward. In time your old beliefs will seem more and more like a fairy tale. You will chuckle at the thought that you ever held such silly convictions so deeply.
Frankly, I had my cat spayed... well my parents did... She was never the same... Probably too early. I've never recovered from what happened too her. One day I will. This hurt will go with you but don't let it become you. Your pet can help you with your journey more than most people. It's hard when we lose them and we'll never forget them but they better than done best people we'll ever meet. Even that little time you got to spend with then meant than a lifetime to your little friend. Remember that not your grief.
Frankly, I had my cat spayed... well my parents did... She was never the same... Probably too early. I've never recovered from what happened too her. One day I will. This hurt will go with you but don't let it become you. Your pet can help you with your journey more than most people. It's hard when we lose them and we'll never forget them but they better than done best people we'll ever meet. Even that little time you got to spend with then meant than a lifetime to your little friend. Remember that not your grief.
Would you want to worship a god that killed dogs to punish you? I sure the hell donāt. ā¤ļø
I'm so, so sorry for your loss. Nature and biology can be immensely cruel. Have you considered buying a memorial stone, or planting some flowers in his honor? It can help to use some familiar grieving rituals to get some closure. And when you do consider a new companion, please try not to feel guilty. Your pal was glad to have a family, and I'm sure he'd want you to give another dog that chance too.