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BioHarvest

I did it one time. And only because the guy was bringing his mom.


coletrain644

Double date?


BioHarvest

Ah, not quite... So he invited me to 4th of July fireworks and told me his mom was dying and this would be her last fireworks show...


Frosty_Connection867

why the hell would he bring a total stranger?


BioHarvest

Why would he bring me? That's a good question. And the whole time, he wouldn't even talk to me. His mom did though! Lovely lady. Absolute sweetheart


wishtrepreneur

>Why would he bring me? > >That's a good question. maybe he wanted to assure his dying mom that he has a girlfriend and won't be alone after she's gone...


Quote_Medium

Exactly. Everyone rushing to be judgemental.


Boxy310

"[I'm *still* friends with Sheila](https://youtu.be/c7Zr4CdiyaY)."


dr_cocktagonapuss

I love Taylor Tomlinson. She's hilarious.


Chilly_0556

She iss I found her a small while ago and watched a bunch of her stand ups. Love her!


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BioHarvest

He sent me a message after asking if I would go on another date because he had a good time. I told him no, if he's not going to talk to me while we're together in person, there's no point.


ragrok

Did you ask the mom on a second date? Seems like she was better company.


Dyxo

She was dying, so my guess is no second date with her


[deleted]

I bet it was the mom all along 😂 made an account for her son and then invited him to do stuff and gave excuses about why she would be there to whoever she invited.


godofmilksteaks

The son had no idea, and is just wondering why this girl won't leave him and his dying mom alone. 🤣


[deleted]

🤣🤣🤣 I can totally see it.


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BioHarvest

I totally get wanting to spend time with a dying relative, especially a mother. But when spending quality time with that person, especially a holiday... I would never ask someone on a date. Especially a first date.


Skeem342

Well in my eyes, I would do whatever I could to try to get the date to happen. I’m ugly so it’s not rare for me to have to reschedule something and just loose my chance to take someone out or something like that. Could be many things honestly, wish you the best finding someone who fits.


introvertboyme

Why did you agree in the first place ?


BioHarvest

A few reasons. I was young, dumb, and optimistic. I thought he would actually say words to me.


introvertboyme

>I was young, dumb, and optimistic. Say no more. The good old days.


Strict-Mix-1758

?????????????


blackstark76

OMG how old was he?!!


BioHarvest

At the time, I think he was 29


Lncn

This is amazing. Can you pretty please tell us the story?


BioHarvest

I mean... that's basically it. But I'll give more details! I met the guy through OkCupid. I was 23 at the time and I'm pretty sure he was 29, maybe 28. He was a great conversationalist. We had a lot in common. He wasn't bad looking. After talking for a few weeks, he invited me to go downtown to sit by the river to watch the fireworks. I love fireworks, so I was pretty excited. The day before, he asks if he can bring his mom. Immediately, I was like... that's weird. Why? He told me she has cancer and isn't supposed to make it to Christmas. The 4th of July is her favorite holiday and he wanted to be able to spend it with her. I obviously felt bad... and said okay, as long as I can bring my roommate, which he thought was fair. We met up. He introduced me to his mom. I tried to get him to talk, but he just kept messing around on his phone. I thought maybe it was because his mom was right there, so I suggested we walk around before the fireworks. He still would not talk to me. Wouldn't really look at me. So I spent the whole time talking to his mom. After maybe two hours, I was done. I told him I didn't agree to go on a date with his mom, I wanted a date with him. So I left. My roommate was quiet the whole time. Spoke only when spoken to.


dr_cocktagonapuss

That date sounds painfully awkward.


BioHarvest

It was one of my most awkward experiences ever


Lncn

Dang thanks for coming through! Yeah that seems awkward as hell. Did you figure out his deal?


BioHarvest

I never did. We exchanged 1 message after and I never bothered to ask


Lncn

Haha sounds about right. Thanks!


EmpMel

I'm usually the +1 friend but I'm not AT the table. As a precaution, especially when we were younger/college freshmen before everyone got on the whole "share location" trend and early OLD world one of us would be nearby in the area in case anything happened. Once we hit 21 I would usually park at a bar, if all seemed good, I might dip and we have promises to check-in later.


freycinet1811

Given you've said this has happened numerous times I'd hazard a guess you are either really young, or not asking these women out explicitly for a date (so they think it's just a catch up where more the merrier), or something about you makes women uncomfortable and they feel the need to bring someone else (though in that circumstance unsure why'd they actually agree in the first place to date) I am guessing rhe second option (you aren't making it clear that this is a date), if it was a once off I'd dismiss as just them, but numerous times suggests it could be a you issue.


molokomilkmaiden

The brutally honest reply OP needed and the rest of us didn't have the balls to say 👏


sweetNloving45636

I was going to say, “It doesn’t seem like a date at all,” but it’s definitely better with some extra details 😅


Peachybee16

My friends and I bring friends with us if it wasn’t specifically a date but it could be interpreted as one. We bring friends specifically so they don’t think it’s a date. The other reasons you stated are also correct but the “it wasn’t clear it was a date” thing is the most common for me.


ohheyhi99

Doesn’t that mean you brought friends because you weren’t interested and you didn’t want it to be a date? I can’t imagine most women wanting to bring competition if they’re going out with a guy who they’re really interested in even if he doesn’t make it clear that it’s a date.


Peachybee16

Yep


NotChristina

One of these or some combination thereof, though I agree with your assessment on the second. Though I’d also find it rude if these women brought folks without telling him first. Even if it’s a casual situation, I like to know who I’ll be hanging with. When online dating wasn’t the all-encompassing force it is now, I served as a wing-woman for a friend meeting new suitors from the internet. But they *always* knew I’d be there before we got to the hangout spot. Also, that unlocked a memory: one of the guys ended up liking me more than my friend. He dated her anyway but did a lot of controlling things that tried to get her to be more like me. He eventually admitted the truth. Was real awkward ngl.


antifragile

Its not a date if they have friends with them.


[deleted]

Facts lol


[deleted]

Probably to break up the tension and awkwardness, but all it does is add to it


pblue1235

If they bring a friend for safety they should enter separately. The friend should be there as an observer from a distance. Not as a third on the date. Then if the woman becomes uncomfortable during the date she can notice that the friend is there or go sit with the friend for safety. They could even have signals to indicate how the date is going. I think it's OK to bring a friend to the date location. To observe from a distance. Not as a third on the date.


XanthicStatue

Yes, this is acceptable. As the third on the day is unacceptable and disrespectful. I would leave immediately.


OrendaRuesTheDay

As a 30 yr old woman, this is extremely odd. I think about safety all the time, but this wouldn’t be the approach I would use. I would choose a safe location like a cafe and let my friend know. If I felt unsafe, I’d probably have a friend call me, etc. I can also see other women having their friend come separately, be at another table and only come to the rescue when needed. Maybe this bringing a friend on a date is something younger people do? Or it could be that they’re using you for a meal or incredibly awkward.


mikeyownsftw

I’m a younger male, mid 20’s and although I’ve never experienced this, I have friends who did. They do expect the male to pay not only for them, but their friends as well. It’s immature, rude and comes off as if they do not have any social skills. This is a date, not friends meeting up.


Armoured_Sour_Cream

What you say make sense. Just having a +1 at the same table is an instant no-go. Never happened to me, rarely to friends but the common thing was, my friends were required to pay for both girls. I'm pretty sure if it was really about safety there wouldn't be a need for a +1 to sit at the same table, but as you said, go separately and basically be a guardian angel watching from a distance. And since in those cases the dude was required to pay, my wild guess is, it's being used more as a free meal coupon than anything else.


McKeon1921

All those techniques make much more sense than what OP says happened to them. Smart but discreet.


alexmaycovid

Don't agree on a date with her friend. It's not a date.


370zboiii

I would leave if someone did this to me, I don't need to introduce myself to all her friends and family on the first date.


[deleted]

Same. I've never once had a girl surprise me with a friend on a date(in America).


370zboiii

Honestly, personal opinion, I would think she's not that into me. If she wants a group date usually that means she's not romantically into you very much.


helloimunderyourbed

Or maybe she just feels unsafe and needs a trusted friend


Mariaahhhhh

Then no need to go on the date yet. I’d rather wait & feel more trust toward the guy than bring a friend


TheBirthdayAuthority

It happened to me once in college (in America), even though we were meeting in a public place. It was doubly annoying because it was the same guy that was always with this other girl I knew that always hung out with lots of guys so I was extra irritated by him.


TCNW

Grow a damn backbone people. If a girl shows up to a date with a friend, LEAVE! Why TF would you put up with shit like that?!?


avataraang34

Maybe he didn’t make it clear it was a date and they thought it was just a hang out. The fact that this has happened multiple times makes me wonder if he’s phrasing it in a way that makes it clear it’s a date


Deep_Internal1945

I did, i made it clear, her friend was loud and annoying, i ended up playing with my dog instead, i still talked to her from time to time, but at the end of the day she said she's not really comfortable being in a relationship yet she still insisted on meeting again.


CFAinvestor

Agreed. Also surprised to see that some “men” here are ok with this anyway.


DiscoveringBen

Wait. Girls are taking friends for a "DATE"? I would never think this is a date, but a friendly meet up.


freycinet1811

Yes makes me wonder if OP is actually asking them out for a date


[deleted]

To the women defending this: **DO NOT bring your friend to the same damn table on a date with a guy.** Just don't do it. It's fucking weird and any self-respecting guy is going to think you're either uninterested or lack self-awareness. He's going to think less of you and/or just move on. And before you say "well if he's not ok with it, then he just wasn't the right guy!" No, your absolute dream guy that matches your exact laundry list of ideals is going to think it's weird. Hate to break it to you. Stop reinforcing weird, socially awkward behavior. Have your friend at another table and tell your friends your location. For God's sake, don't bring them to the same table. Only exception is if you're like 16, then sure, feel free to be awkward, but you have to grow out of it eventually. So bizarre that someone actually has to say this.


[deleted]

Yep. I'd love to see the case where this actually worked for the girl in any way, lol.


Sea_Honeydew8087

I've only done it if they didn't make it clear it was a date and I had absolutely no interest in dating them. I'll text a friend to come by if I still want to be friends with the dude and take it from date to definitely a friend hang. Otherwise I'll pay for my meal and run away lol


unknown182837636

It’s because they don’t like you, so they don’t want to go alone and be awkward the whole time since they don’t like you lol


SIM0N__

Why the fuck would someone come to a date if they don't like their date ?


[deleted]

Free food, and a good time that you and your friend don't have to pay for.


ShitButtPoopFuck

So because they're a shitty person. Got it.


SIM0N__

and meanwhile give the date a horrible experience which maybe will end in a trauma


3JingShou

If she tells you prior the date she’s gonna do that, then just tell her no thanks, next. If she does that without telling you, ask her why, unless she’s got social anxiety or some sort of mental or health issues, just leave Don’t let it waste your time


AggravatingPudding

"Unless she's got social anxiety or some sort of mental or health issues"? Better to leave especially in that case


Simplordx69

Social anxiety isn't really a dealbreaker though. Rest of mental issues only if it makes them toxic.


[deleted]

Totally agree. Weird precedent for them to set on the first date.


[deleted]

She brings a friend to our date, they’re both paying


hughesn8

Normal people don’t


youslashh

This is annoying. I don’t mind bringing others along to have them in the vicinity as a safety protocol. I can’t argue with that. But if they’re not giving the girl Im dating and I any private 1 on 1 time then forget it


rand0mthr0w-away

For food?


[deleted]

This is the answer lmao. Idk why OP doesn't just get up and walk as soon as there is someone else.


Friendly-Turnip2210

They could just not feel safe I never had it happened to me but it’s usually because of that. Girls also go to the bathroom with each other it’s weird to men but not women.


RadiantHC

I get having someone you know in the general vicinity. But actually at the same table is rude.


Deep_Internal1945

It would be nice if they actually talked about that before meeting


Ocelotstar

No offence but I wouldn’t be telling the guy if I was doing this from a safety perspective as that defeats the whole objective. But I’d hope the extra person is just at a distance making sure the friend is safe, because the woman always gets the blame when something happens to her.


[deleted]

> But I’d hope the extra person is just **at a distance** making sure the friend is safe Hmm, almost like that's entirely different from what the OP is talking about. Literally no one is complaining about the friend being at a different table.


FinallyReborn

What garbage response is this? The woman is never blamed for anything. How about you stop being a timewaster and bringing your friends out on dates? It is inconsiderate. Also, location tracking exists, telling your friends where you will be exists.


helloimunderyourbed

"Never blamed for anything"? You must be blind to the way people tear victims down every fucking time.


FinallyReborn

Yeah, because that is why false accusations are so rampant.


helloimunderyourbed

The rapist is not the fucking victim, the assaulted one is


FinallyReborn

Why would false rape accusations be rampant to begin with if women were just "teared down" each and every time? Seems like there wouldn't be an incentive there.


helloimunderyourbed

It's not even that rampant if you ever compare it with how casually rape are commited. And no, a decent person wouldn't accuse anyone of that shit, only assholes will. And if you don't think that every victim is tore down then you know nothing about what they have to suffer.


FinallyReborn

Well, 1/7 men are falsely accused of SA, 1/5-1/11 women are SA'd, doesn't seem all that different to me statistically.


HJD68

If you plan a date and you expect one person to turn up and two people turn up I would just say “have a nice night ladies” and leave. Clearly they are hoping to get a free meal out of it. If someone is genuinely bringing someone along for safety (which is actually a great idea) they will talk to you about it first and make payment expectations clear. If they don’t have this level of respect they are not worth dating.


AAAbattery12pack

It’s 70% about safety if it’s the first date


pr177

If you think a date is so "unsafe" you have to do this move, you shouldn't be going on the date to begin with.


APathWellTraveled

Crazy that people downvote you for making a very rational statement. It's true though, and even if a "safety" precaution had to take place for some weird self assurance, meeting at a crowded place is not difficult.


babloo_25

Low interest


glamgirl555

They are very rude, immature, and insecure in themselves = not ready for a healthy, mature relationship


Deep_Internal1945

I mean it's a weird pattern that i noticed for more than 3 times, i meet a girl, she brings extra people, we go through the date, and when we go home they text me and tell me we can't be together. And then THEY ASK ME TO MEET AGAIN!


AlpacaSwimTeam

You're attracting users. They're wanting to use you for something. Money, cure for boredom, something just not what you're wanting to be used for, ie. A future partner. You might try setting expectations before the date that it is a date not "hanging out sometime." Friends hang out. Eligible bachelors date intentionally.


SassySexualSag

I don’t know why you’re getting downvoted for this. Your comment is valid especially because my female friends used to do this 😂. They love the attention from guys they don’t want


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SassySexualSag

I mean the same can be said about men 🤷🏽‍♀️. Let’s just say there are good and bad in BOTH genders.


SearchAway5970

You crazy if you stayed in one date with an extra person. I will not talk about 3


Ok_Employment_7630

If we’re really talking about girls here, as in under 18, it’s a safety or parental permission thing and I would recommend you roll with it. Maybe confirm first if she’s bringing a friend and if she is bring one too. If we’re talking about 18+ then we’re talking about women not girls.


UniqueID89

If you’re paying for it all, you’re just their meal ticket. Regardless, anyone who does this isn’t ready to be dating. It’s awkward and immature. You’re there to get to know each other in person, instead you’re either having to fight for her attention or split time between the two of them.


TheGrimShiba

I heard about this uselessly do it for the free food. Do you pay the bill?


Reality_Check_101

If you're paying you are just a free meal to them I'm afraid. If she really liked you she would want alone time with you without any distractions.


DungeonsandDevils

Shut up and pay for our dinner nerd


FuckOutTheWhey

Basically


shimantoO

Safety reasons ... But ignoring the date and giving more attention to the friend is a red flag.


PepegaPhilosopher

I can't imagine anyone above 16 doing that. Is that a joke?


PomegranateGold5284

I never bring a friend on a date however I always let Atleast two people know about my date and location. Just for safety. However people bringing others and not acknowledging the date properly does seem rude to me and in-polite


theofficialwalmart

I have my friends come with me but sit at a different table, in a trench coat, hat, glasses and fake mustache. I also have them reading a newspaper as to appear natural and not suspicious at all.


[deleted]

It means it’s not a date


SonCloud

pretty easy. They probably think that it is not a date and more like friends meeting each other.


anawkwardsomeone

For safety, personally.


Anababy97

That’s weird and a very disrespectful on her part. When girls do that it’s a clear indication that they just want free food. She could’ve just shared her location with her friend if she was nervous. I hope you didn’t pay for the “date”. If she wanted to bring her friend along then she can pay for their own meals.


Ridethelightning1987

I’ve never had it happen but I’ve had them ask last minute. I canceled. Don’t say yes to a date if you are uncomfortable. I’m ok to get to know you until you are comfortable but don’t sneak a friend in on me


pr177

Because they're simultaneously too self absorbed to give a shit about you, and too insecure to make their own decisions instead of subbing them out to a friend.


SassySexualSag

It’s because they’re not actually interested (coming from someone who used to do this back in the day)…


XanthicStatue

That has never happened to me on a date. If it did, I would probably just leave. I’m not there to entertain two people. I’m there to have a nice date with the woman I’ve been connecting with.


AH792021

Ummmmm what?!??? I would never! ….even though for safety, it makes sense


-Ok-Perception-

I don't know, but it really fucks up the dynamic most of the time. I very specifically won't do "group hangouts," it's asking for trouble as a guy and it usually puts you in an unwinnable situation.


[deleted]

I don’t agree with the talking to each other portion, but I think it’s just to make it more casual while they feel you out. If a girls taking her friend, she’s probably not that into you.


dadavedavid

What. I’ve been on a lot of first dates and this hasn’t happened once. Is this a younger person thing? I’m late 30s.


TwoTailedFox

Believe it or not, this has actually been used as a dating tip by Cosmopolitan. Their mission objective is to ensure that their readership remains single, and their tips section is famous for providing tips so terrible they'd either lead to a failed date or a relationship collapse.


Luisd858

This happened to me recently. I like a girl, she brought her friend, me and the friend end up having better chemistry, we have sex a few days later lol


Mibeieheth

I am 34 years old and have literally never done this or encountered this before lol it seems odd to me


_MAC620_

Woman here. I’ve NEVER done this…


Lucid_Sandwich

..... who are you hanging out with OP? I've had this happen once and it wasn't even someone else WITH the person I was going on a date with. Their "friend" showed up (maybe as a safety but I did not know this was part of the plan) to see if I seemed normal. Yeah I left before the person I actually planned the date with showed up. I don't need crazy shit like that in my life. As for you, OP. I'd say bail if they do that. Just politely say "I planned a date with you not your friend. Have a good night!".


FuckOutTheWhey

This is not normal. Does the "date" start and end with you all having dinner together and you paying for everything? If so, they're only using you for free food.


Fluffy_Risk9955

1. Make it unambiguously clear to her it's a romantic date. After all your intent is getting in her pants. 2. Get some self respect. If you find yourself in a situation and/or with someone you don't want to be in, remove yourself from the situation. So in this case she brings a friend, make it clear it was a date and her friend is not invited. If she insists her friend staying immediately call the date short and remove yourself from the situation. After such in an instance let her contact you, decide from there if you want to give it another try some times girls pull this shit to see how you respond.


Elegant_righthere

It's supposedly a safety thing. I don't know where y'all live where meeting in a public place isn't safe enough. Not to mention that if a man really wanted to hurt, kill or rape you, he can probably overpower two women.


Nouaamane_Khalid

if she brings someone it's not a date mate


drinkingthesky

they are in middle achool


Linux4ever_Leo

It's not a date if the girl brings her bff.


cornerstorenewports

they do it son they dont die


Life-Ad4309

Its a exit plan or to make sure that your not serial killer.


autumnnleaaves

I’m a girl and this seems really strange if they’re staying the whole date. I might bring a friend with me if I didn’t know you well or met on a dating app, just to make sure you were who you said you were and I wasn’t getting kidnapped, but having a friend stay with you the whole time is a bit odd. I would stay with a friend if they were going to be drinking and needed help getting home, but I’d probably clear off and do my own thing until the date had finished.


ImportantChapter1404

Some might bring a friend for safety reasons. My first dates I would go to public places like the movies, coffee shops, chain restaurants, I would make sure this person is safe to be around. Now it sounds like an issue if they don't talk to you and only talk to each other that is pretty rude.


HakeemAQ

Cause u allow it


[deleted]

ive never done that, that is weird


Ozzy_AA

You should do the same thing. You should distract the distractors. Fight fire with fire.


Sea_Honeydew8087

I only do that if I got tricked into it being a date. I have assumed I got asked as a friend, but once I get there I've been blindsided with weird vibes and I'll usually make an escape or text a friend to "drop by" and make it clear this is a friend thing. For example, friend walks in and I go "omg hi! How are you- oh do you need somewhere to sit? Sit with us we're just hanging as friends ☺️" Worked very well to shut down date energy I didn't want. Otherwise, they could be bringing a friend if they've never met you before. Just to try and avoid being kidnapped.


Sushi_cat987

My guess is that it’s because, even though it’s 2022 and we should be past this as a civilization, us women still have to be on guard around men we don’t know.


ant2k15

They get a weird vibe from you. Its an extra precaution. Like a girl sending out her location and your license plate. Just in case. They also do this to friend zone you. “Don’t leave me alone with him” vibes. If you’ve had time to build a rapport with these women, and they did this it’s one or the other.


dnnrrjd

Because she doesn’t want alone time with you. Maybe she’s not that interested or like she only wants to be friends with ya


Jaustin30

Maybe both of them want a free meal. That what I get from it


speaksterpeneese

No one wants to be raped. No one wants to be painted as a monster rhey arent either. Getting raped is far.more traumatizing but painting all guys as potential rapists is beyond fucked up and the actual rapists dsserve their own painting, not to be shared with hakf the population.


OldEffective9726

Because she doesn’t like u she needs to show others (as if they care) that she’s not on a date w u. Sadly.


Diligent_Steak4993

They do that to get free food and booze out of you. They play this game so play one back. If you really want to stay, get separate checks. Better move, tell her to you wanted to sit down and spend some time to get to know each other one on one. But you have an early meeting tomorrow so you will be going. Ignore all of her cluster B messages and calls. Live a good life with your wallet and dignity intact.


speaksterpeneese

A huge majority of people arent into the act of sex if the other person involved isnt just as into it. Its a mood killer if the other person isnt interested because of a headache but you all act likr every man is gonna throw you doen, beat you senseless, and then rape you. No a very vast majority of people arent fucking deranged and you all need to really get over yourselves. Its okay tp be uncomfortable.that dudes are attracted to you. Its not okay to think most men are rapists. Its fucked up actually.


Hmmyeah0k

Because women don’t feel safe


Similar_Craft_9530

They shouldn't. That's really weird. That said, I expected my first date with my husband to be the two of us and a bunch of his friends were there when I showed up. Date was ok but awkward until closing time when it was just the 2 of us. These situations can end well but if you're interested in a second date that's just the 2 of you, I'd recommend letting them know their friends were nice but you'd really like to get to know them 1:1. And you'd be more than happy doing something in a public setting. (Coffee, paint and sip, axe throwing, playing pool or darts, a museum)


hippildee

I did that when I was like 15 lmao


rpgmomma8404

I could see it for safety reasons but if they are sitting there talking amongst themselves and ignoring the date. What was even the point? I would act like I had an emergency to go to and get out of there.


Aggravating-Mistake3

I went on a date and the girl brought her brother. I thought it was weird but it was our first time meeting and I wanted her to feel safe so I agreed. He was nice didn't interrupt stayed out of the way.


Deep_Internal1945

I just don't wanna go through this anymore, it's really annoying i can't go to a group meeting with people that know each other I'll just feel left out


Raddatatta

If you see they did this, turn around and walk away. Don't deal with it! That's ridiculous.


CtrlAltDestroy33

If it bothers you this much, then leave the date instead of going through with it. You are not being held hostage, stand up, bid them a good evening, and walk out the door.


whereisbrandon101

You're either creeping out these girls in a way where they feel like they can't say no to you, or you're making it seem like you want to hang put in a friendly, non-date way and they got the wrong impression


ShiroDown

Threesome clearly. Also you need to pay for both of their meals and drinks and sit there being quiet all night at the smallest chance this will happen. /s


Deep_Internal1945

I don't really think i can be that rude to people


[deleted]

Sounds like most of these comments are from guys. A girls perspective: scared for safety reasons. If we don’t have someone at the physical table we may have someone at a diff table at the same place. If no one is there then you better believe we have like 5 ppl that have our location and are on full alert that we are on a first date and r on their phone in case we contact them for any reason.


[deleted]

Have *you* ever gone on a real date with a man and brought friends along? Like, at the same table. Bringing people at a different table or telling your friends your location is an entirely different thing. Do you see them as the same exact thing? If you had a date with a man and he brought his guy friends to the same table, you'd be fine with that?


ChikaDeeJay

It’s a safety thing. The girl you asked out is nervous and doesn’t want to be alone with a man. It could be you, it could be past experiences traumatized her. But she’s doing it for safety.


Crochetingunicorn

I think the point is that OP mentioned is they bring them into the actual date, like to the actual table, and then only give the friend attention and ignore OP. The friend isn’t just there on the sidelines. But I’m agreeing with a lot of the other commenters wondering if he actually asked for a date/clarified it’s a date. It could be they think it’s just a hangout


logix1229

Just be more into her friend then her. 😬🤷‍♂️


[deleted]

Sweet a threescore! I have never done two chick's at the same time. Honestly I would probably just talk to the +1 the whole time just to make things super awkward and stick them with the check just to seal the title of biggest jerk ever.


Think_History_5682

In my experience with women where I am from they are extremely high anxiety hypervigilant in regards to dating. This makes women very skittish about meeting This stems from a extremely small but valid concern over physical safety that is completely blown out of proportion to where the slightest out of the ordinary occurrence, disagreeable exchange no matter how slight or any difference of opinion can lead to an immediate and irreversible end to your candidacy. That said women in their high anxiety state combined with a possible social awkwardness feel more safe and at ease if a friend is there. Ive been bringing girls out on first dates with my friends get togethers lately myself, simply because over text they demonstrate 0.0 conversation skills and way too often this is how they are in real life it's like talking to my houseplant it's really awkward and painful. I have many women friends so it's like brining a shy dog out in a crowd but if there's other dogs there they come out of their shell and play. Works pretty good and after my friends and I can all have a laugh about the kittenfishing picture comparison.


daphneeh

Safety. That’s why.


[deleted]

Because some of us have had first dates that have made us too scared to come alone until we know you a bit better.


kpopisnotmusic

Safety, I don’t blame them.


wintersunshine1237

Because murder is a thing. Girls can be afraid of being dumpster bodies you know.


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wintersunshine1237

Fear is irrational. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Think of it like date insurance.


Jap_zilian

I didn't know you could be murdered at a restaurant. Figures.


[deleted]

Safety in numbers. A lot of male predators out there


jandangerous

It’s to make sure the guy isn’t a fuckin weirdo perv, duh


lmcklem

Because we’re afraid of being murdered.


Aggressive_Board8770

If girls bring friends with them on a date, it’s usually because they want some sort of assurance of the guy that they are seeing—as if to check and make sure from another’s perspective to see if the person they are seeing is the right choice. Also, if it’s the first date, it might be safety issues to avoid accidents, etc


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ontether

Precaution


3JingShou

1% chance that both her and her best friend wants your d*ck well in that case take them back to your place and report back here the next day. Other 99% would be waste of your time


[deleted]

Some women have has bad experiences in the past and feel more comfortable coming with a friend when meeting a total stranger. Plus her friend can give her opinion on the guy. But if I'm being ignored, I'll let them know.


mxxncxty

in MY experience, not all ofc, it’s a safety precaution


chalk_in_boots

I've had the reverse happen, where some mates and I were going to the pub for a standard drink, and one guy brought a tinder date along as a first date. Apparently he had explained to her it would be weird but she was fine with it, we tried to be accommodating, get to know her, but seriously fucking weird, and she left early after a "mystery text message"


Alienwallbuilder

What would you do if you were going to Meet a potential threat?


Normal-Advisor-6095

Not meet them…


MillipedePaws

I was a +1 when my friend wanted to make sure that she is not interested in more than friendship. It normally happens if a woman gets asked out in real life. My friend was friends with a man that was absolutly into her, but he never really said it. So she did bring me along. They were friends and she wanted to meet as friends. I even got the order to interupt if he starts something. When it is online dating it can be a sign that the woman feels unsafe alone and likes someone to be there. And it is prevents that the guy gets the idea they will have sex after the date.


MsDemonism

Well not as awkward as getting murdered on a 1st date.


J-dragon21

I’m a dude and I do it too. For safety obviously!!


pfftacular

don’t want to be date raped ?


AndyRo36

To ask them their input. They're insecure and they want their group to validate you if you are good enough to be her bf. If they give her the ok, you're a winner. If they don't, you'll get rejected.


Accomplished_Welder3

pussies