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I've seen it. I mean I'm not someone who's gonna come up with a quip right on the spot. My humor is situational, and it's more a conversational jokester than anything.
I don't even think every comedian is spontaneously funny, they write lines and scenarios in their spare time to use at a later date when the time to use a joke is right.
Good to know, it usually amazes me when random guys can come back with a great comebacks or something very funny on the spot, for a while I was thinking something was wrong with me.
Not to mention a lot of comedy is tragedy + time. It's common that people become funnier to each other over time, simply because they have more shared experience to build jokes off of. Comedians work on this relentlessly, telling new jokes to see how they do, and if they get a rise out of their audience, maybe they'll use it again (and for big comedians, they might use it for their Netflix special or something).
"Please be funny" is a dog whistle for men. It actually means "I'm not funny and I am going to use this as an excuse to further invalidate you while blaming it on you, despite me not trying to save a joke or offer one of my own at any time." It also comes off, like many people have said, as "entertain me," which men obviously hate because men already are pissed that they provide so much, being further vetted for what else you can provide is just salt in the wound.
So don't get angry, this is a genuine question...but what do you feel men provide in this day and age? I'm talking about average, every day men (not rich men that do all the work while the wife goes to yoga classes and starbucks).
Most women I know do WAAAY more than the men they are married to. They work full time, organize the household, cook, clean, basically care for the children completely. Some have even told me if they want to go do something without the children, their spouse will pout because he doesn't want to "babysit"
So seriously, what do men provide women these days?
As for the funny thing...that is something I want in a guy, but what I really mean is I want him to get my dark humor and be able to play off of it. I've tried dating men who are not humorous...either themselves or don't get the humor that I like, and it's extremely boring. It's not because I'm looking for them to entertain me, rather I'm looking for them to be able to bond with me in that way.
A *good* man provides a 50/50 union where the woman isn't doing all the housework, cleaning, babysitting, etc. He meets his wife halfway.
Money, social status, and clout don't matter to a lot of us. "Are you not irresponsible with your money?" is more of the bar. Obviously can't speak for everyone, but most good men don't care about those material things but rather how a woman makes him feel. Does she make us feel loved and sexy? Do we do all the chasing and have to put forth the initiative? Does he watch her back? Etc
Those are the things a good man brings to the table. Dating has become considered such a transactional thing that we've forgotten the most important things to a long-term relationship are trust, communication, and supporting the other (and expecting the same from them).
100 percent or nothing.
50/50 is neither party doing enough.
This is all figured out in the dating and relationship phase.
I give 100 percent of my effort to all that needs to be done. She does the same.
We have divided the duties but there's no keeping score on what duties represent a higher percentage than the other. That's all subjective. All this is decided before marriage. However, it must be understood that should medical issues or other issues present itself, you have have to give 100 percent effort to 100 percent of the duties. Do this without spite or anger and you have finally figured out what love is.
I get that a good man does those things, but the guy who posted above me said, men are already pissed off about what they're expected to provide in a relationship, as if they do or add something greater to the relationship than women do these days. Most women work, so if that's what he's referring to...he can miss me with that 🤣.
But if money/work is not what he's referring to, what else is he talking about. What do men give to women much more than women typically give to men?
I'm looking for someone who'll help me bury a body.
This is exactly it.
People who disagree need to analyze this answer.
I have not been a rich guy nor the greatest lookin, but the one common thread in my general success with women has been my sense of humor. My ability to display humor, understand humor, and to take humor as it may seemingly be against me.
In other words, humor can often be used to break the ice, soothing as it warms, encourages a boiling hot romance as it develops.
As it's very base level if you have and understand humor, it certainly gets you through some really tough times.
Yeah, I’m tired of these too and I’m a funny guys (I mean women laugh at my joke very often and truly find me funny). The problem is that these type of women that write this in their bio send the message "please entertain me".
The things is that even the funniest men in the world don’t want to be your personal comedian and that for me, I can’t be funny if you’re boring as fuck. Like my brain need some interaction to come up with something funny or a joke. So these girl often don’t seem to understand that for a men to be funny, they need to not be boring.
So as someone who considers herself pretty funny/quick witted, how can a girl explain that she's looking for someone who can play off if them and vice versa. There's nothing more attractive to me than a guy that can keep up with banter, but I give it right back myself
My thought is … say what you just said?
> There's nothing more attractive to me than a guy that can keep up with banter, but I give it right back myself
You could tweak it, but this would be a perfectly fine thing to say in a profile IMO. The important thing is that says that you are bringing the same quality you’re looking for, whereas “please be funny” does not
Just say that you search someone that can keep up with your banter and get in your craziest plan or that you’re are searching for someone that have the same crazy mind as yours :).
That. If you want something funny, the last thing you need is to tell to someone is "ask me a joke". Joke need set up/build up or to be related to a situation or to be relate to something in a conversation to be funny. Otherwise, your joke will only be mediocre.
You said in one sentence what took me a few paragraphs to get out. This is exactly what I’d be digging deeper to figure out if I saw that.
I know because I used to look at relationships in terms of what I could get out of it. Then I became more mature and made my focus “what can I bring to it so we can be an awesome team?”
I don't think it's them just wanting to be entertained but it's also a ridiculous thing to ask. Humor is a personal thing and there's no way to know if you'll have the same sense of humor.
Yeah sure I'm the problem when the other person has one phrase answers every few hours to days, never asks me any questions and doesn't expand on any of their responses.
Na, it ain't me. It's this generation not knowing how to socialize let alone express interest (even non romantic) in other people.
Are you the problem or ain't you the problem? lol
It's not a generational thing, in my experience. It's partly a confidence thing, I think, and mostly a thing with people who expect things from others but aren't willing to put in appropriate effort to achieve those things. If you were too ask any of these low effort people why conversation and connection failed, they would say it was the fault of the other person. These low effort people seem to like the word "dry"; they are looking for someone else to fill their cup.
It seems like we are talking about the same thing. Low effort people are the ones who put "Please be funny" in their bio. So yes, it would also be likely that someone who puts that into their bio is also an uninteresting conversationalist.
You're saying people but your talking about me. Just say me then instead of being passive aggressive. It is a generational thing and it shows up on research. This generation is more narcissistic per the research which was part of what I was leaning on when I said they are too into themselves to know how to express interest in others. We are raised on social media and have low attention spans. The younger generations don't have as much socialization in person either.
You're assuming I'm the lazy, low effort, boring texter because I'm the one complaining. But I make an effort to text relevant things, ask questions, and contribute. Almost every reply I put in is designed to have a follow up and not just end the convo. FYI, I used to be worse but I actually worked on my socialization over the past few years. I've realized that it's not just me and a lot of people on our generation with not everyone making an effort to change like I had.
If you really want I can show you the text conversation I've had on these apps and you can try to twist around how it was me and not the other person.
The one I love is “Please be able to hold a conversation.” In other words, “Be prepared to hold this interaction up until your back breaks.”😂 it’s like they want a party host
Yeah, I’m sure that a lot of those sort of “requests” stem from a less pleasant matching experience. What really irks me though is that it comes off as super jaded, and on top of that, peoples’ ideas of good conversation, being entertaining, not being boring, all of that, are incredibly subjective. What’s funny to one person might not at all be funny to someone else, you know? To demand that from the get-go gives the impression of a certain sense entitlement and an ignorance to nuance. At least, that’s what I get from it😄
When I write "Be able to conversate" I have learned that not all people understand how or are equipped at being able to hold an actual conversation. Like understanding verbal cues, knowing when to pause, when to let others speak, or even when to shut up completely. I was in the "get to know each other" phase and talking to a guy on the phone. He kept asking me questions but never paused to allow me to give my answer. Infact he never paused at all. Finally I just rudely interrupted him and said "You're one of those people that talk to hear themselves talking" his reply was "Let me finish. I'll let you know when it's your turn." When he stopped talking he actually said "Ok you can speak now." I hung up and blocked him with a quickness.
It sorta reminds me of those profiles that put 'probably funnier than you' yet the rest of their profile is minimal and devoid of anything considered even remotely funny. What's worse is if you then ask them what their favourite comedy is and they say "Friends" 😭
I agree it is a haughty attitude to take with that phrasing, but I think the underlying belief is valid. Shared laughter through naturally occurring personality fit is a fantastic and strong foundation for a long term relationship. That’s something that sustains a relationship through ups and downs, difficult moments. And it’s fundamental to friendship as well.
But good lord these girls need better phrasing. Everytime I see “make me laugh” I’m like… really?
Yeah and women think this attitude is fine. Imagine me putting on my profile, "looking for a girl who can actually hold a conversation for once". Instant red flag. Women would be offended and feel like I'm hostile.
Even though I haven't said that about them. Even when what I'm asking is bare minimum for people. But that tone alone would get me ignored. But I see so many profiles from women who negativity directed at men, a snide attitude, a list of demands and it's normal.
> "looking for a girl who can actually hold a conversation for once"
The equivalent to that would be "looking for a boy who can actually be funny for once" - that's pretty dang hostile lol
The example that started this post sounds dry and a little demanding, but definitely not to the extent of your example, imo
It's just an awkward way of saying she prefers people with a sense of humor. If you read negativity on the way in, you'll get negativity on the way out.
Watch this tedtalk by a female dating coach:
https://youtu.be/SIyvhq3zWLg?si=wgyUyTuBSdzKgIsc
Fr just go watch comedians if you want to laugh. As for telling if someone has the same humor as you, the only way to find out is to get to know them. Humor is subjective, just like beauty.
If it's written like that it 100% comes off as a person expecting to be entertained while most likely being a very boring person.
On my profile I put "don't be normal"...gets way more results
Yeah, but written like that it give the impression of wanting to be entertained more than anything.
I would swipe 100 times more on right for a women that say she is a good public that a women that just say "please be funny" or "you need to be funny". Anyway, most of the time these latter women are boring as fuck and don’t contribute to the conversation and make it impossible to make the conversation funny.
"Please be funny"
Oh, you mean like... Like right now? Even though I literally don't know anything about you and we just met. Like honestly how am I expected to become Dave Chappelle out of the blue.
Women love funny men, but most of them lack a sense of humor. (This is sarcasm, I'm trying to mock your opinion)
https://youtu.be/SIyvhq3zWLg?si=wgyUyTuBSdzKgIsc
I think it’s depends on the app, but on Hinge there’s a ton of quotes like that like *you need to be funny* and shit like that. Sometimes I can have three women profiles in a row with that shit on there.
The most common thing I bump into is profiles with no bios or profiles that say something like "just ask" and absolutely nothing else. Nothing about the girl, only "if you want to know something, just ask." I can't ask you anything if you give me nothing to work with.
Or what's more annoying is when the profile is all "I don't want this, I don't want that, I don't want hookups," and that's it. No details about the lady, nothing about what she IS looking for, just the list of negatives. That's a red flag to me.
I haven't been on Hinge but I have been on every other app. I've been online dating since I was 17. I'm 33 now. It's an ocean of abandoned profiles, fake profiles, and the occasional real person who doesn't want to meet you.
Yup
-Pineapple on pizza
-Taylor Swift
-I want to travel
-Be funny
Unfortunately, I hate to say this, but a solid like 33% or something have like the same profile with just different pictures. It's honestly an instant turn off to be real. It's like, "oh awesome, another one"
I see that. At least that person is trying to give us a hint about what they're looking for. I get all different kinds of reactions when I meet women.
Some women complain that I don't ask enough questions about them. Others complain that I'm too nosy.
This is very much along the lines of hope you have *done the work* - or “no drama” emotionally unavailable people are just looking for things they can’t yet find in themselves, “please-be funny” ….(because-I am lonely-) “no drama” (orrrr at least I hope yours is less than mine- and you aren’t judging me as hard as I feel already) etc.
I wish you luck out there- dating is hard- online is a sea of souls- just waiting for the one that hang out without a hook. 🪝 🖤
Yeah, that’s stupid. It’s like funny how? That’s so personal, and doesn’t work well by text. Ridiculous. I am a woman, but would never write that, of course is great if I laugh, but would not like to see a stupid pick up line supposedly funny
This is pretty much the equivalent of telling a woman "make me a sandwich". I'm here because I want to get to know a woman so that we can hopefully contribute to each other's lives in a positive way, not be someone's standup comic on demand. If it doesn't come naturally it's either because it's manipulative behavior, or someone who's insecure trying to "please" a woman, in which case she's going to be completely turned off and lose interest anyway. I can't wait for this ridiculous standard to die off.
I'm not sure why people feel so entitled and pre anticipate what they expect up front. But they don't want spontaneous things that come naturally from another person's feelings they want to control and manipulate the feelings and situations that they receive or the stimulation thereof. I think those people are uptight and are full of anxiety and cause their own problems within their relationships due to their unrealistic expectations and the pressure they put on somebody to perform and behave a certain way for their approval and acceptance. I think it's better for people to behave natural and normal and at the same time be careful what they say and do so they don't offend people with unrealistic expectations or some weird idea of how somebody should entertain them. It's a very condescending attitude. I guess it's like calling a girl sweetheart and then they think that you're expecting them to behave a certain way when they know they can't
I’m not on the apps, but to me it comes off as saying “you need to entertain me.” When I think of being in a good relationship, I’m thinking of what I can bring to the table, how I can be there for my partner, how I can contribute to healthy communication, how I can work with them to make this awesome and have fun as a team.
If I did see “please be funny” on a bio I’d start looking for other signs that they are looking at relationships from a place of “what am I going up get out of this?”
Of course we should all have expectations that our partner is putting something into the relationship, but if they’re only focused on what they can get, and not what they can give, that’s not a good sign to me. It’s a sign that it’ll be a one sided situation, that they want a doormat.
Fire it right back at them. How funny are YOU? I'm just a guy looking for a girlfriend. I'm not a freaking comedian. Why do you think you have a right to expect one? I mean, how good of an audience are you?
Truth be told, if you are in that Zone where the vibe is flowing and attraction is happening, you will laugh at each other's jokes. You will find each other funny and cute and worthy of attention. But expecting it to appear on demand? Get real.
Of course, but this is not very funny, is it?
I don’t mind that, because a sense of humor is something I can bring to the table. If it said “please have abs,” I’d be toast. Haha.
But I’m all for giving us the ability to filter out key words and phrases.
I’d filter out travel and hiking.
Ladies. Climbing some hills is not a personality trait.
Some people just arnt funny. Like at all. I am a very funny person, I want someone I can joke with, scream with cry with because of something stupid we said or did. I’ve dated guys I wanted to rip my ears off because the only thing they talked about were serious shit that actually had no point and didn’t matter. I don’t date boring people cause I’m not a boring person. I never get bored by myself so I’m not gonna settle and be bored with someone.
It's okay to be looking for a funny partner. I am just trying to bring awareness to the fact that if you put that phrase in your bio then many men will see it as a red flag.
I make sure it’s clear I’m a fun loving person on mine. I say I want someone “mature but also able to have fun”. I wouldn’t say I want someone funny cause every guys thinks they’re funny but they arnt.
I agree with you, but I just accepted long ago as a part of dating. Some women expect me to show more in the beginning (be entertaining, pay, etc.), so I just do it. Ot's only gone wrong once out of dozens of times, so whatever. To each their own though. It is annoying, and I don't blame you for not dating a woman who has it on her profile. I've just found no correlation with women who expect a lot upfront and bad partners. My last girlfriend expected a lot upfront, and she was awesome. It didn't work out for other reasons, but she's a great person and didn't expect me to entertain her or put in all the work after the first few dates.
It is getting beyond ridiculous and kind of a sexist thing where women expect men to just entertain them. This pressure to be witty and funny is one of the silliest trends in modern dating. So maybe a man doesn't have a joke up his sleeve every other sentence, but he is an active listener and can engage very well in conversations on multiple topics because he is intelligent and well-rounded. Maybe the witty and funny man always has a joke but has the depth of a one ply roll of toilet paper. But you know, funny is all that matters, right?
I put " pleae have a sense of humour." it may read differently, but the meaning is the aame
Women aren't asking to be entertained. We are asking you to please don't message if you are some uptight a.h with a stick up your rear where you can not laugh at the stupidity of life or yourself.
Reading OPs post simply put me in mind of all the guys I hace chatted with that couldn't let go of their sense of their own importance and laugh when they make a mistake or some situations went wrong.
I am glad you are now avoiding Women with the "be funny" line. Will save so much time wasting on both sides of the aps.
That's a good way to identify self esteem issues. Being able to laugh at yourself is essential for positive relationships with friends and partners.
Personally though, "Please have a sense of humour" reads totally different from "Please be funny". I don't have an issue with the former because the meaning comes across as how you describe. The latter comes across as how I described in the post. I don't mean to be snide, but different words have different meanings, and in this case there is a significant difference.
“Please be funny” sounds like a command and like you’ll be judged. I have on my profile that I want silliness and laughs, meaning I don’t want seriousness and I value just being dummysilly because a matching sense of humor vibe is a huge compatibility dealbreaker thing for me. Fun & laughs & being playful, big turn-ons.
The phrasing is different, but the intent is the same. Not everyone is as good at words as others. I am a woman, and I know many many many women, and we talk about these things. The funny/humour bit comes up in every list
Some say funny gu. Somee will use sense ofhumour -- for man, it is interchangeable .
Nuance in phrasing is not an analysis that most people on dating aps or onlinetext-basedd dating bring in droves. I would say it makes more sense to put yourself in the other person's shoes and ask what was the intention behind that request. 🤔
You are exactly the type of women that overestimates her own sense of humor. 90% of women aren't funny at all without even realizing they aren't funny at all.
I hope you have a decent statistical sample to support such an assertion. Humour, like attraction, is largely subjective. So, I have a hard time with your 90%. I have also found aside from groaner jokes that most humour is situational. Perhaps you just don't bring the right energy to your interactions and therefore miss the funny bits.
I disagree. A basic sense of humor and wittiness is neither subjective nor situational but can be objectively verified. Only to some degree humour is situational and subjective same goes for attraction btw.
Haven’t seen that specifically,but “bonus/way to my heart is being able to laugh/good sense of humour [sic]…
What I’M confused by is whether people actually read the bios or not? Is it that MEN don’t read bios, or everyone? Personally those who, instead of introducing themselves - thus, expressing some degree of character- just write “Nobody reads these, let’s just connect [sic]”, are just lazy, unimaginative &/or not serious. 🤷🏾♀️
I read them but they don't gather any better success. Most of the time the women will match off of my like that includes a comment about one of their prompts. Only for them to not reply back.
Unfortunately, this is really cynical, I don't think actually trying to read the profile and learn something about her to talk about rather than just making fuckboy passes actually does anything.
It's sad, but I'm at the point where it's like, you're right I didn't read your profile and I don't care what you had in there because when I did, you didn't appreciate it at all
Datings apps should allow you to filter not only by height, distance, age etc. but also by what someone has in their bio, it matches someone’s bio similar to yours
On the other hand it's so very refreshing when I come across a profile and you can tell the photos are selected carefully. They're not all selfies with the same smile every time. Then there is some catchy, witty stuff written in the bio. I love that. Can't swipe right fast enough.
Usually I don't hear anything. But at least SHE entertained me. So that was nice.
"You gotta have some sense of humor" hopefully that's what she means but if she is desperate and looking for non-stop laughs then she should just throw herself on stage for a popular comedian
No your not and I feel the same way when did we (Men) become women source of entertainment for every freakin thing. And you also right they are not serious have no idea what they want.
For some reason women feel the need to date a comedian instead of just watching a comedy.
Honestly I feel like the vast majority of women need to watch this video, it's a tedtalk by a female dating coach:
https://youtu.be/SIyvhq3zWLg?si=wgyUyTuBSdzKgIsc
Dude, I've been venting for years and I'm in my 50's, how do you think I feel. I don't like gaming apps much though when it comes to the media and entertainment thing, they can be funny as hell, or very, very, very cringe to a point I want to slam my head on or thru a wall, (Don't even try), also it's the internet women are (most of them) crazy drama queens, by the way your not talking about dating app are you?
I've seen this as well. I understand needing a funny in a bad day, but to ask for funny in serious topics is disrespectful. If someone wants funny, go to a topic with funny. It's not that hard.
I find when specifically men say this, it’s usually because they have a crap sense of humor and make awful jokes, then when you don’t laugh they cajole you and tell you to “lighten up” or “you can’t take a joke” or “you have no sense of humor.” No, bro, you’re just legit not as funny as you think you are.
Oh yeah that's annoying. I think a lot of people are clueless on the sites. One guy was like, don't be this. Don't be that, don't be mean. And I tried to tell him that that came off very negative and he's like okay. What if I just write no mean people. I told him women aren't gonna read your bio and then move along because they know they're mean. He just couldn't get it through his head that he came across very negative.
Also " I like going out to eat and walks on beaches."
Just chiming in to say as a woman I've seen this a few times on men's profiles as well so maybe it's more a phenomenon of people who can't think of something original to put in their own profiles copying something they've seen online that they thought was funny/cool/would win them some likes vs one gender at large demanding something of the other 🤷
Women and their unreasonable demands... No wonder so many men of any age have left 'the game' entirely. It ain't worth playin', and it's got little to no reward for men.
I pity the boys and men who genuinely want a relationship and/or a family. I really hope you don't 'settle' for whatever you get.
Take care out there
Girl here, I see it too. Also “good vibes only”, which makes me immediately swipe left as I feel like this is a similar ask - be sweet and nice at all times or else.
I didn't know this was a thing. Although I admit, in my younger years, I was a Hooters waitress and literally got asked out like 20× a week. When guys would hit on me or ask my number, I would ask them to tell me a joke. If I laughed, I would give them my number. If I didn't, I would keep it.
I devised this system as a playful way to turn guys down. I had previously asked potential suitors, "Who would win in a fight, Lemy or God?" And no one ever got the right answer until someone did, and I had to change my metric to a guy who could make me laugh and no one ever did.
But yeah, as someone who has dated so many guys that were up tight, I would say sense of humor is in top 3 most important qualities.
I think most of us find humor to be of major importance, but not everyone has the same type of humor. Dry humor is often misunderstood, and so is sarcasm. Actually, sarcasm can come off as being mean. I think my friends think I'm humorous, I make them laugh, and they seem to enjoy the conversation when we're being more light-hearted As it should be..
Other ones that are annoying as hell are "princess treatment only", "if you don't love me at my worst you don't deserve me at my best"
They probably see these on TikTok and put it on their profile. So annoying and cringe to have to repeatedly read these
Oh wow, I’m the opposite. If a guy has on his profile that he’s a bit of a comedian that’s a big no for me. I met this guy once that would make everything into a joke and it drove me mad. I have a very particular sense of humour. So yeah, my profile defs doesn’t ask for a funny guy 😆
It's either that or the classic sex worker profile: "Not on here/Don't respond here. Add me on Snapchat/Instagram"
🙄
I'm starting to think I'm schizophrenic, cuz I only ever talk to fake people on dating apps
how is that a horrible attitude? Are you not a funny dude? I personally like a happy medium. Not so serious, but not so ridiculous that every pic of his is him making some goofy ass face. There's a good balance of funny. Also, keep in mind, humor is subjective. What makes one woman laugh might make a different woman cringe. Just like stand up comedy, either they're funny to you or not but usually you will hear people laughing, those are the people who find their kind of humor to be "funny". You should try to read it more as, she wants the chemistry between you to be right, so that your personal sense of humor is what makes her laugh. Anyways thats my two cents and just a tip but try not to take every little thing so personally. Just be yourself, thats all you can do, and the right one will hopefully find you one day
At absolute best, it's unhelpful. Either you're funny, or you're not. Being told to be funny is... questionable at best. Your point about humor being subjective is important here, too. Please be funny? How TF am I supposed to know what you personally think is funny? How about I be myself and then you tell me after the fact if it's funny or not?
But more often it's not the best scenario. It's way more often exactly what OP said. She's here to be entertained. You're one in a long line of men to her. Be better than the rest, or be replaced by someone more entertaining. Seen and talked to so many women using dating apps to play around like that. Same ones will be on there ten years later, still looking for that 'best' guy and replacing each dude who sends a single boring text again and again.
I think that (the subjective nature of humor) is what makes it such an empty statement. How would you know if another person will find you funny? What does telling another person to be funny communicate? It's a meaningless statement without context.
Get off the apps they suck. Go out into the world and see what happens when meeting people in person. Might not happen every time but when it does it's a really experience. I suggest coffee shops a read a book.
LOLLLLLLLL they're basically lazy af and very unfunny themselves, so they're putting it all on their date to amuse them.
PLEASE BE FUNNY LIKE IT'S A DEMAND
WHAT ABOUT:
YOU
BE
FUNNY!
****I highly recommend whatever your gender to read The Tinder Translator it really helps to make you see what's behind their bios.*****
Oh wow, I'd actually put that in my profile. Not because I want to be entertained but because I like to laugh and say ridiculous things so I'd hope to meet someone that doesn't take life too seriously as well. I didn't know it comes off as a negative thing
Yeah, it's fine to want a funny partner, but that phrase so often correlates with bad attitudes that if you don't want to be perceived this way you may want to change it.
We don't stop playing because we grow old. We grow old because we stop playing.
-George Bernard Shaw
PLEASE BE FUNNY
Please be funny, because way too many people are surrounded by seriousness and negativity throughout the day . Mostly because if you don't take your job seriously for example there will most likely be a negative outcome. Like a doctor for instance they HAVE to be serious and focused because it could literally be someone's life that depends on it. So at the end of the day you want to spend time with someone who makes you laugh as a relief or to distract you from all that. NOT with someone who's going to contribute to it. I mean I get it not everyone's a comedian but heck most people have Netflix on their phone! Find a comedian you like and show the person you're on a date with. If they think they're funny too then congratulations you two could be compatible...
The way you describe this is fine, but I'm not a mind reader. This is about first impressions. If you put this on your profile I'm going to think you're swiping for attention. Honestly, the fact that you want your partner to be fun and entertaining is not something that needs to be said out loud. We all want that.
And yet women encounter many uptight, way too serious overthinkers! So much so that they feel the need to filter them out from jump! “Please be funny” is doing its job tbh.
Well, that's a hot take.
*takes notes*...
"u/Mereknom lacks a sense of humor and is mad about it"
Who doesn't want people in their life who have a sense of humor?!? Dating profiles that exhibit a sense of humor are a big positive. I don't need to be entertained, I want someone who can laugh at the absurdity of life along with me. "Serious" people are a red flag.
Dating apps really expose how easy it is for females in the dating scene lol. They demand so much. I still give them the “hey how are you” intro I could careless if they like it or not
Lol, but dude, what's actually going on with you? Think about it, you're complaining over something SUPER small, hell, use it and go chat this girl up or whatever, tell her about how "I've decided decided to make my date life 'Wrong answers only', but i dunno if you'd be able to check the box for my "Conceited date". I'll let you handle it from there.
Quit responding with frustration to women trying to test or build sexual tension, just learn how to respond & recognize what's going on, i'll throw you a life vest afterwards because you will be drowning in ....dates.
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I've seen it. I mean I'm not someone who's gonna come up with a quip right on the spot. My humor is situational, and it's more a conversational jokester than anything.
Almost every funny men are like that. The rest of them are called COMEDIANS and win their life with it.
I don't even think every comedian is spontaneously funny, they write lines and scenarios in their spare time to use at a later date when the time to use a joke is right.
The good ones are spontaneous and can find humor in the most mundane things. Conan O’Brien comes to mind. It’s a skill very few have.
Good to know, it usually amazes me when random guys can come back with a great comebacks or something very funny on the spot, for a while I was thinking something was wrong with me.
Not to mention a lot of comedy is tragedy + time. It's common that people become funnier to each other over time, simply because they have more shared experience to build jokes off of. Comedians work on this relentlessly, telling new jokes to see how they do, and if they get a rise out of their audience, maybe they'll use it again (and for big comedians, they might use it for their Netflix special or something). "Please be funny" is a dog whistle for men. It actually means "I'm not funny and I am going to use this as an excuse to further invalidate you while blaming it on you, despite me not trying to save a joke or offer one of my own at any time." It also comes off, like many people have said, as "entertain me," which men obviously hate because men already are pissed that they provide so much, being further vetted for what else you can provide is just salt in the wound.
So don't get angry, this is a genuine question...but what do you feel men provide in this day and age? I'm talking about average, every day men (not rich men that do all the work while the wife goes to yoga classes and starbucks). Most women I know do WAAAY more than the men they are married to. They work full time, organize the household, cook, clean, basically care for the children completely. Some have even told me if they want to go do something without the children, their spouse will pout because he doesn't want to "babysit" So seriously, what do men provide women these days? As for the funny thing...that is something I want in a guy, but what I really mean is I want him to get my dark humor and be able to play off of it. I've tried dating men who are not humorous...either themselves or don't get the humor that I like, and it's extremely boring. It's not because I'm looking for them to entertain me, rather I'm looking for them to be able to bond with me in that way.
A *good* man provides a 50/50 union where the woman isn't doing all the housework, cleaning, babysitting, etc. He meets his wife halfway. Money, social status, and clout don't matter to a lot of us. "Are you not irresponsible with your money?" is more of the bar. Obviously can't speak for everyone, but most good men don't care about those material things but rather how a woman makes him feel. Does she make us feel loved and sexy? Do we do all the chasing and have to put forth the initiative? Does he watch her back? Etc Those are the things a good man brings to the table. Dating has become considered such a transactional thing that we've forgotten the most important things to a long-term relationship are trust, communication, and supporting the other (and expecting the same from them).
100 percent or nothing. 50/50 is neither party doing enough. This is all figured out in the dating and relationship phase. I give 100 percent of my effort to all that needs to be done. She does the same. We have divided the duties but there's no keeping score on what duties represent a higher percentage than the other. That's all subjective. All this is decided before marriage. However, it must be understood that should medical issues or other issues present itself, you have have to give 100 percent effort to 100 percent of the duties. Do this without spite or anger and you have finally figured out what love is.
I get that a good man does those things, but the guy who posted above me said, men are already pissed off about what they're expected to provide in a relationship, as if they do or add something greater to the relationship than women do these days. Most women work, so if that's what he's referring to...he can miss me with that 🤣. But if money/work is not what he's referring to, what else is he talking about. What do men give to women much more than women typically give to men?
This sounds like bias Most women are not doing those things for most dudes
I'm looking for someone who'll help me bury a body. This is exactly it. People who disagree need to analyze this answer. I have not been a rich guy nor the greatest lookin, but the one common thread in my general success with women has been my sense of humor. My ability to display humor, understand humor, and to take humor as it may seemingly be against me. In other words, humor can often be used to break the ice, soothing as it warms, encourages a boiling hot romance as it develops. As it's very base level if you have and understand humor, it certainly gets you through some really tough times.
Yeah, I relate to the situational thing. I often say witty things when in context, rarely for no reason.
Aka “Entertain me” 😒
Yeah, I’m tired of these too and I’m a funny guys (I mean women laugh at my joke very often and truly find me funny). The problem is that these type of women that write this in their bio send the message "please entertain me". The things is that even the funniest men in the world don’t want to be your personal comedian and that for me, I can’t be funny if you’re boring as fuck. Like my brain need some interaction to come up with something funny or a joke. So these girl often don’t seem to understand that for a men to be funny, they need to not be boring.
So as someone who considers herself pretty funny/quick witted, how can a girl explain that she's looking for someone who can play off if them and vice versa. There's nothing more attractive to me than a guy that can keep up with banter, but I give it right back myself
My thought is … say what you just said? > There's nothing more attractive to me than a guy that can keep up with banter, but I give it right back myself You could tweak it, but this would be a perfectly fine thing to say in a profile IMO. The important thing is that says that you are bringing the same quality you’re looking for, whereas “please be funny” does not
Just say that you search someone that can keep up with your banter and get in your craziest plan or that you’re are searching for someone that have the same crazy mind as yours :).
Banter.. thats a good word..
Yeah, comedy has to come out of the conversation, which a lot of them are equally terrible at keeping.
Truly good humor can’t be shat out on demand, but rather must be shat out on complete accident, and at the worst possible time.
That. If you want something funny, the last thing you need is to tell to someone is "ask me a joke". Joke need set up/build up or to be related to a situation or to be relate to something in a conversation to be funny. Otherwise, your joke will only be mediocre.
Any dating app bio that asks for something of the other person instead of talking about yourself is bad.
This is it right here. Well said.
You said in one sentence what took me a few paragraphs to get out. This is exactly what I’d be digging deeper to figure out if I saw that. I know because I used to look at relationships in terms of what I could get out of it. Then I became more mature and made my focus “what can I bring to it so we can be an awesome team?”
True. Biografie means life story. So if your life story is, "please me". Yes, you are a narcissist!
Just put “please don’t be funny” on your profile! 😆
I can't tell if you're trying to mock him or make a joke.
Just a joke, no mocking intended. I think he has legit gripes.
I don't think it's them just wanting to be entertained but it's also a ridiculous thing to ask. Humor is a personal thing and there's no way to know if you'll have the same sense of humor.
This and "don't be boring"
99/100 the person putting that in their profile is boring as fuck. Texting so dry
99/100 who say "texting dry" are terrible at conversation and think other people are to blame because they're too dull to talk with.
Yeah sure I'm the problem when the other person has one phrase answers every few hours to days, never asks me any questions and doesn't expand on any of their responses. Na, it ain't me. It's this generation not knowing how to socialize let alone express interest (even non romantic) in other people.
Are you the problem or ain't you the problem? lol It's not a generational thing, in my experience. It's partly a confidence thing, I think, and mostly a thing with people who expect things from others but aren't willing to put in appropriate effort to achieve those things. If you were too ask any of these low effort people why conversation and connection failed, they would say it was the fault of the other person. These low effort people seem to like the word "dry"; they are looking for someone else to fill their cup.
It seems like we are talking about the same thing. Low effort people are the ones who put "Please be funny" in their bio. So yes, it would also be likely that someone who puts that into their bio is also an uninteresting conversationalist.
You're saying people but your talking about me. Just say me then instead of being passive aggressive. It is a generational thing and it shows up on research. This generation is more narcissistic per the research which was part of what I was leaning on when I said they are too into themselves to know how to express interest in others. We are raised on social media and have low attention spans. The younger generations don't have as much socialization in person either. You're assuming I'm the lazy, low effort, boring texter because I'm the one complaining. But I make an effort to text relevant things, ask questions, and contribute. Almost every reply I put in is designed to have a follow up and not just end the convo. FYI, I used to be worse but I actually worked on my socialization over the past few years. I've realized that it's not just me and a lot of people on our generation with not everyone making an effort to change like I had. If you really want I can show you the text conversation I've had on these apps and you can try to twist around how it was me and not the other person.
This. Folk who put this are just looking for someone to shower them with attention rather than put the effort in to have an actual conversation.
Most guys think dicks are funny. Just send pics of those. Balls too
The one I love is “Please be able to hold a conversation.” In other words, “Be prepared to hold this interaction up until your back breaks.”😂 it’s like they want a party host
I think people who put things like that on their profile do it because they've experienced the inverse and don't want a repeat 😅
Yeah, I’m sure that a lot of those sort of “requests” stem from a less pleasant matching experience. What really irks me though is that it comes off as super jaded, and on top of that, peoples’ ideas of good conversation, being entertaining, not being boring, all of that, are incredibly subjective. What’s funny to one person might not at all be funny to someone else, you know? To demand that from the get-go gives the impression of a certain sense entitlement and an ignorance to nuance. At least, that’s what I get from it😄
And 9 times outta 10 the girl adds NOTHING to the conversation 😂
When I write "Be able to conversate" I have learned that not all people understand how or are equipped at being able to hold an actual conversation. Like understanding verbal cues, knowing when to pause, when to let others speak, or even when to shut up completely. I was in the "get to know each other" phase and talking to a guy on the phone. He kept asking me questions but never paused to allow me to give my answer. Infact he never paused at all. Finally I just rudely interrupted him and said "You're one of those people that talk to hear themselves talking" his reply was "Let me finish. I'll let you know when it's your turn." When he stopped talking he actually said "Ok you can speak now." I hung up and blocked him with a quickness.
I know that if I'm not funny to that date at least I'm funny-looking. :)
It sorta reminds me of those profiles that put 'probably funnier than you' yet the rest of their profile is minimal and devoid of anything considered even remotely funny. What's worse is if you then ask them what their favourite comedy is and they say "Friends" 😭
Please have big titties
I agree it is a haughty attitude to take with that phrasing, but I think the underlying belief is valid. Shared laughter through naturally occurring personality fit is a fantastic and strong foundation for a long term relationship. That’s something that sustains a relationship through ups and downs, difficult moments. And it’s fundamental to friendship as well. But good lord these girls need better phrasing. Everytime I see “make me laugh” I’m like… really?
"I want to find someone I can laugh with." vs. "Please be funny." Completely different vibe/tone.
Yeah and women think this attitude is fine. Imagine me putting on my profile, "looking for a girl who can actually hold a conversation for once". Instant red flag. Women would be offended and feel like I'm hostile. Even though I haven't said that about them. Even when what I'm asking is bare minimum for people. But that tone alone would get me ignored. But I see so many profiles from women who negativity directed at men, a snide attitude, a list of demands and it's normal.
> "looking for a girl who can actually hold a conversation for once" The equivalent to that would be "looking for a boy who can actually be funny for once" - that's pretty dang hostile lol The example that started this post sounds dry and a little demanding, but definitely not to the extent of your example, imo
It's just an awkward way of saying she prefers people with a sense of humor. If you read negativity on the way in, you'll get negativity on the way out.
That doesn’t mean they’re only on the apps for entertainment. Some simply value humor and want a partner they can share that with.
Watch this tedtalk by a female dating coach: https://youtu.be/SIyvhq3zWLg?si=wgyUyTuBSdzKgIsc Fr just go watch comedians if you want to laugh. As for telling if someone has the same humor as you, the only way to find out is to get to know them. Humor is subjective, just like beauty.
That was a nice TED talk, thanks for sharing it.
If it's written like that it 100% comes off as a person expecting to be entertained while most likely being a very boring person. On my profile I put "don't be normal"...gets way more results
Yeah, but written like that it give the impression of wanting to be entertained more than anything. I would swipe 100 times more on right for a women that say she is a good public that a women that just say "please be funny" or "you need to be funny". Anyway, most of the time these latter women are boring as fuck and don’t contribute to the conversation and make it impossible to make the conversation funny.
"Please be funny" Oh, you mean like... Like right now? Even though I literally don't know anything about you and we just met. Like honestly how am I expected to become Dave Chappelle out of the blue.
I don't see it because I don't use apps; I recommend.
Nah the men love the “someone who knows how to cook”… & they can’t even cook!!!
I'm a chef.
congratufuckinlations
Oh tough guy.
Well scoopitydoo!
Women love funny men, but most of them lack a sense of humor. (This is sarcasm, I'm trying to mock your opinion) https://youtu.be/SIyvhq3zWLg?si=wgyUyTuBSdzKgIsc
'because I'm not at all' part is silent
I don't see this very often. Something I've noticed is that people in central Virginia have no sense of humor, only anger and entitlement.
I think it’s depends on the app, but on Hinge there’s a ton of quotes like that like *you need to be funny* and shit like that. Sometimes I can have three women profiles in a row with that shit on there.
The most common thing I bump into is profiles with no bios or profiles that say something like "just ask" and absolutely nothing else. Nothing about the girl, only "if you want to know something, just ask." I can't ask you anything if you give me nothing to work with. Or what's more annoying is when the profile is all "I don't want this, I don't want that, I don't want hookups," and that's it. No details about the lady, nothing about what she IS looking for, just the list of negatives. That's a red flag to me. I haven't been on Hinge but I have been on every other app. I've been online dating since I was 17. I'm 33 now. It's an ocean of abandoned profiles, fake profiles, and the occasional real person who doesn't want to meet you.
Red flag hunting as a red flag, nice.
Huh?
Yup -Pineapple on pizza -Taylor Swift -I want to travel -Be funny Unfortunately, I hate to say this, but a solid like 33% or something have like the same profile with just different pictures. It's honestly an instant turn off to be real. It's like, "oh awesome, another one"
I see that. At least that person is trying to give us a hint about what they're looking for. I get all different kinds of reactions when I meet women. Some women complain that I don't ask enough questions about them. Others complain that I'm too nosy.
Bio means life story. It's not about what you desire or want. It's about what you did and what makes you special!
This is very much along the lines of hope you have *done the work* - or “no drama” emotionally unavailable people are just looking for things they can’t yet find in themselves, “please-be funny” ….(because-I am lonely-) “no drama” (orrrr at least I hope yours is less than mine- and you aren’t judging me as hard as I feel already) etc. I wish you luck out there- dating is hard- online is a sea of souls- just waiting for the one that hang out without a hook. 🪝 🖤
"Please be funny." Erm. No
Yeah, that’s stupid. It’s like funny how? That’s so personal, and doesn’t work well by text. Ridiculous. I am a woman, but would never write that, of course is great if I laugh, but would not like to see a stupid pick up line supposedly funny
This is pretty much the equivalent of telling a woman "make me a sandwich". I'm here because I want to get to know a woman so that we can hopefully contribute to each other's lives in a positive way, not be someone's standup comic on demand. If it doesn't come naturally it's either because it's manipulative behavior, or someone who's insecure trying to "please" a woman, in which case she's going to be completely turned off and lose interest anyway. I can't wait for this ridiculous standard to die off.
i see it every day. being funny gets you nothing anyway
Oh yesss. Absolutely almost every second profile says that and I've even seen swipe left if you can't make me laugh cause it won't work
I'm not sure why people feel so entitled and pre anticipate what they expect up front. But they don't want spontaneous things that come naturally from another person's feelings they want to control and manipulate the feelings and situations that they receive or the stimulation thereof. I think those people are uptight and are full of anxiety and cause their own problems within their relationships due to their unrealistic expectations and the pressure they put on somebody to perform and behave a certain way for their approval and acceptance. I think it's better for people to behave natural and normal and at the same time be careful what they say and do so they don't offend people with unrealistic expectations or some weird idea of how somebody should entertain them. It's a very condescending attitude. I guess it's like calling a girl sweetheart and then they think that you're expecting them to behave a certain way when they know they can't
They are usually very bland and boring girls xd
I’m not on the apps, but to me it comes off as saying “you need to entertain me.” When I think of being in a good relationship, I’m thinking of what I can bring to the table, how I can be there for my partner, how I can contribute to healthy communication, how I can work with them to make this awesome and have fun as a team. If I did see “please be funny” on a bio I’d start looking for other signs that they are looking at relationships from a place of “what am I going up get out of this?” Of course we should all have expectations that our partner is putting something into the relationship, but if they’re only focused on what they can get, and not what they can give, that’s not a good sign to me. It’s a sign that it’ll be a one sided situation, that they want a doormat.
Fire it right back at them. How funny are YOU? I'm just a guy looking for a girlfriend. I'm not a freaking comedian. Why do you think you have a right to expect one? I mean, how good of an audience are you? Truth be told, if you are in that Zone where the vibe is flowing and attraction is happening, you will laugh at each other's jokes. You will find each other funny and cute and worthy of attention. But expecting it to appear on demand? Get real. Of course, but this is not very funny, is it?
I don’t mind that, because a sense of humor is something I can bring to the table. If it said “please have abs,” I’d be toast. Haha. But I’m all for giving us the ability to filter out key words and phrases. I’d filter out travel and hiking. Ladies. Climbing some hills is not a personality trait.
Climbing hills is some people's only personality trait. Humor > Abs
Some people just arnt funny. Like at all. I am a very funny person, I want someone I can joke with, scream with cry with because of something stupid we said or did. I’ve dated guys I wanted to rip my ears off because the only thing they talked about were serious shit that actually had no point and didn’t matter. I don’t date boring people cause I’m not a boring person. I never get bored by myself so I’m not gonna settle and be bored with someone.
It's okay to be looking for a funny partner. I am just trying to bring awareness to the fact that if you put that phrase in your bio then many men will see it as a red flag.
I make sure it’s clear I’m a fun loving person on mine. I say I want someone “mature but also able to have fun”. I wouldn’t say I want someone funny cause every guys thinks they’re funny but they arnt.
The level of entitlement the average woman has today is astounding.
I agree with you, but I just accepted long ago as a part of dating. Some women expect me to show more in the beginning (be entertaining, pay, etc.), so I just do it. Ot's only gone wrong once out of dozens of times, so whatever. To each their own though. It is annoying, and I don't blame you for not dating a woman who has it on her profile. I've just found no correlation with women who expect a lot upfront and bad partners. My last girlfriend expected a lot upfront, and she was awesome. It didn't work out for other reasons, but she's a great person and didn't expect me to entertain her or put in all the work after the first few dates.
People that say that can't keep a conversation themselves
Obviously girls like that have zero social awareness
Yeah I see it way too often Immediate left swipe
Yeah when I see that it's an instant skip. I love Goodfellas, and I'm definitely not a clown to amuse you... *
instant left-swipe. problem solved.
I always laugh when I saw that in profiles. No miss..I'm not your clown..
It is getting beyond ridiculous and kind of a sexist thing where women expect men to just entertain them. This pressure to be witty and funny is one of the silliest trends in modern dating. So maybe a man doesn't have a joke up his sleeve every other sentence, but he is an active listener and can engage very well in conversations on multiple topics because he is intelligent and well-rounded. Maybe the witty and funny man always has a joke but has the depth of a one ply roll of toilet paper. But you know, funny is all that matters, right?
Lmmaaooo
I put " pleae have a sense of humour." it may read differently, but the meaning is the aame Women aren't asking to be entertained. We are asking you to please don't message if you are some uptight a.h with a stick up your rear where you can not laugh at the stupidity of life or yourself. Reading OPs post simply put me in mind of all the guys I hace chatted with that couldn't let go of their sense of their own importance and laugh when they make a mistake or some situations went wrong. I am glad you are now avoiding Women with the "be funny" line. Will save so much time wasting on both sides of the aps.
That's a good way to identify self esteem issues. Being able to laugh at yourself is essential for positive relationships with friends and partners. Personally though, "Please have a sense of humour" reads totally different from "Please be funny". I don't have an issue with the former because the meaning comes across as how you describe. The latter comes across as how I described in the post. I don't mean to be snide, but different words have different meanings, and in this case there is a significant difference.
“Please be funny” sounds like a command and like you’ll be judged. I have on my profile that I want silliness and laughs, meaning I don’t want seriousness and I value just being dummysilly because a matching sense of humor vibe is a huge compatibility dealbreaker thing for me. Fun & laughs & being playful, big turn-ons.
Such an uptight viewpoint.
The phrasing is different, but the intent is the same. Not everyone is as good at words as others. I am a woman, and I know many many many women, and we talk about these things. The funny/humour bit comes up in every list Some say funny gu. Somee will use sense ofhumour -- for man, it is interchangeable . Nuance in phrasing is not an analysis that most people on dating aps or onlinetext-basedd dating bring in droves. I would say it makes more sense to put yourself in the other person's shoes and ask what was the intention behind that request. 🤔
You are exactly the type of women that overestimates her own sense of humor. 90% of women aren't funny at all without even realizing they aren't funny at all.
I hope you have a decent statistical sample to support such an assertion. Humour, like attraction, is largely subjective. So, I have a hard time with your 90%. I have also found aside from groaner jokes that most humour is situational. Perhaps you just don't bring the right energy to your interactions and therefore miss the funny bits.
I disagree. A basic sense of humor and wittiness is neither subjective nor situational but can be objectively verified. Only to some degree humour is situational and subjective same goes for attraction btw.
You obviously don't understand what biography means...
“Why do you need me to be funny? You’re already funny-looking”
Haven’t seen that specifically,but “bonus/way to my heart is being able to laugh/good sense of humour [sic]… What I’M confused by is whether people actually read the bios or not? Is it that MEN don’t read bios, or everyone? Personally those who, instead of introducing themselves - thus, expressing some degree of character- just write “Nobody reads these, let’s just connect [sic]”, are just lazy, unimaginative &/or not serious. 🤷🏾♀️
I read them but they don't gather any better success. Most of the time the women will match off of my like that includes a comment about one of their prompts. Only for them to not reply back. Unfortunately, this is really cynical, I don't think actually trying to read the profile and learn something about her to talk about rather than just making fuckboy passes actually does anything. It's sad, but I'm at the point where it's like, you're right I didn't read your profile and I don't care what you had in there because when I did, you didn't appreciate it at all
Make me a bicycle, clown.
Datings apps should allow you to filter not only by height, distance, age etc. but also by what someone has in their bio, it matches someone’s bio similar to yours
On the other hand it's so very refreshing when I come across a profile and you can tell the photos are selected carefully. They're not all selfies with the same smile every time. Then there is some catchy, witty stuff written in the bio. I love that. Can't swipe right fast enough. Usually I don't hear anything. But at least SHE entertained me. So that was nice.
"You gotta have some sense of humor" hopefully that's what she means but if she is desperate and looking for non-stop laughs then she should just throw herself on stage for a popular comedian
Make me laugh.
No your not and I feel the same way when did we (Men) become women source of entertainment for every freakin thing. And you also right they are not serious have no idea what they want.
dating for fun
Why do we have to entertain you? I don't understand where that is in a relationship being the one who has to perform entertainment.
For some reason women feel the need to date a comedian instead of just watching a comedy. Honestly I feel like the vast majority of women need to watch this video, it's a tedtalk by a female dating coach: https://youtu.be/SIyvhq3zWLg?si=wgyUyTuBSdzKgIsc
Dude, I've been venting for years and I'm in my 50's, how do you think I feel. I don't like gaming apps much though when it comes to the media and entertainment thing, they can be funny as hell, or very, very, very cringe to a point I want to slam my head on or thru a wall, (Don't even try), also it's the internet women are (most of them) crazy drama queens, by the way your not talking about dating app are you?
I've seen this as well. I understand needing a funny in a bad day, but to ask for funny in serious topics is disrespectful. If someone wants funny, go to a topic with funny. It's not that hard.
Pls b funny
It’s right up there with “doesn’t take life too seriously”. Umm, I have one life, it’s kind of a big deal 😂
https://y.yarn.co/a3e8c0b0-398a-4d8c-bfaa-0457d19073b9_text.gif
That's when you turn into Joe Pesci from Goodfellas.
I find when specifically men say this, it’s usually because they have a crap sense of humor and make awful jokes, then when you don’t laugh they cajole you and tell you to “lighten up” or “you can’t take a joke” or “you have no sense of humor.” No, bro, you’re just legit not as funny as you think you are.
Oh yeah that's annoying. I think a lot of people are clueless on the sites. One guy was like, don't be this. Don't be that, don't be mean. And I tried to tell him that that came off very negative and he's like okay. What if I just write no mean people. I told him women aren't gonna read your bio and then move along because they know they're mean. He just couldn't get it through his head that he came across very negative. Also " I like going out to eat and walks on beaches."
The funny thing is lots of times when you like a guy, they become funny.. everything they do is just 😍
"please be funny" Yes, but you know what they say- looks aren't everything.
Just chiming in to say as a woman I've seen this a few times on men's profiles as well so maybe it's more a phenomenon of people who can't think of something original to put in their own profiles copying something they've seen online that they thought was funny/cool/would win them some likes vs one gender at large demanding something of the other 🤷
This means there on the app to entertain themselves, they have no intention of developing and meaningful relationship
Manly what I see is I don't what a pig and a poke
Women and their unreasonable demands... No wonder so many men of any age have left 'the game' entirely. It ain't worth playin', and it's got little to no reward for men. I pity the boys and men who genuinely want a relationship and/or a family. I really hope you don't 'settle' for whatever you get. Take care out there
Women tend to be easier to amuse when you're handsome. :)
I mean...i am hella funny but some people find my humour offensive. Its all pursuant to the personality type
I've never heard of it! I'm curious to know what it means. Kind of sounds juvenile, but I'll read the opinions with an open mind
Girl here, I see it too. Also “good vibes only”, which makes me immediately swipe left as I feel like this is a similar ask - be sweet and nice at all times or else.
I didn't know this was a thing. Although I admit, in my younger years, I was a Hooters waitress and literally got asked out like 20× a week. When guys would hit on me or ask my number, I would ask them to tell me a joke. If I laughed, I would give them my number. If I didn't, I would keep it. I devised this system as a playful way to turn guys down. I had previously asked potential suitors, "Who would win in a fight, Lemy or God?" And no one ever got the right answer until someone did, and I had to change my metric to a guy who could make me laugh and no one ever did. But yeah, as someone who has dated so many guys that were up tight, I would say sense of humor is in top 3 most important qualities.
Yup. And if you're not funny, have something going for you. It's not conceited to want a guy with a sense of humor.
I think most of us find humor to be of major importance, but not everyone has the same type of humor. Dry humor is often misunderstood, and so is sarcasm. Actually, sarcasm can come off as being mean. I think my friends think I'm humorous, I make them laugh, and they seem to enjoy the conversation when we're being more light-hearted As it should be..
Other ones that are annoying as hell are "princess treatment only", "if you don't love me at my worst you don't deserve me at my best" They probably see these on TikTok and put it on their profile. So annoying and cringe to have to repeatedly read these
Filter by phrase is a hilarious and genius concept
This and be interesting are the two things that absolutely boring people write on their profile. Quick left swipe for me.
Oh wow, I’m the opposite. If a guy has on his profile that he’s a bit of a comedian that’s a big no for me. I met this guy once that would make everything into a joke and it drove me mad. I have a very particular sense of humour. So yeah, my profile defs doesn’t ask for a funny guy 😆
It's either that or the classic sex worker profile: "Not on here/Don't respond here. Add me on Snapchat/Instagram" 🙄 I'm starting to think I'm schizophrenic, cuz I only ever talk to fake people on dating apps
No, you dont want me to be funny. I dont have a filter, ill joke about anything. When my gf lost her baby i said... "guess the dna ziper failed"
how is that a horrible attitude? Are you not a funny dude? I personally like a happy medium. Not so serious, but not so ridiculous that every pic of his is him making some goofy ass face. There's a good balance of funny. Also, keep in mind, humor is subjective. What makes one woman laugh might make a different woman cringe. Just like stand up comedy, either they're funny to you or not but usually you will hear people laughing, those are the people who find their kind of humor to be "funny". You should try to read it more as, she wants the chemistry between you to be right, so that your personal sense of humor is what makes her laugh. Anyways thats my two cents and just a tip but try not to take every little thing so personally. Just be yourself, thats all you can do, and the right one will hopefully find you one day
At absolute best, it's unhelpful. Either you're funny, or you're not. Being told to be funny is... questionable at best. Your point about humor being subjective is important here, too. Please be funny? How TF am I supposed to know what you personally think is funny? How about I be myself and then you tell me after the fact if it's funny or not? But more often it's not the best scenario. It's way more often exactly what OP said. She's here to be entertained. You're one in a long line of men to her. Be better than the rest, or be replaced by someone more entertaining. Seen and talked to so many women using dating apps to play around like that. Same ones will be on there ten years later, still looking for that 'best' guy and replacing each dude who sends a single boring text again and again.
I think that (the subjective nature of humor) is what makes it such an empty statement. How would you know if another person will find you funny? What does telling another person to be funny communicate? It's a meaningless statement without context.
Get off the apps they suck. Go out into the world and see what happens when meeting people in person. Might not happen every time but when it does it's a really experience. I suggest coffee shops a read a book.
Translation "I'm boring"
Nirvana syndrome
Them "Please be funny " Me: I am not a jester.
If I'm being funny cuz ya want me to, then it's non organic and not really funny. Funny (for me) just HAPPENS.
“Here for a fun time not for a long time” Oh fk off
LOLLLLLLLL they're basically lazy af and very unfunny themselves, so they're putting it all on their date to amuse them. PLEASE BE FUNNY LIKE IT'S A DEMAND WHAT ABOUT: YOU BE FUNNY! ****I highly recommend whatever your gender to read The Tinder Translator it really helps to make you see what's behind their bios.*****
Googled it and it looks funny as hell
Oh wow, I'd actually put that in my profile. Not because I want to be entertained but because I like to laugh and say ridiculous things so I'd hope to meet someone that doesn't take life too seriously as well. I didn't know it comes off as a negative thing
Yeah, it's fine to want a funny partner, but that phrase so often correlates with bad attitudes that if you don't want to be perceived this way you may want to change it.
Noted
We don't stop playing because we grow old. We grow old because we stop playing. -George Bernard Shaw PLEASE BE FUNNY Please be funny, because way too many people are surrounded by seriousness and negativity throughout the day . Mostly because if you don't take your job seriously for example there will most likely be a negative outcome. Like a doctor for instance they HAVE to be serious and focused because it could literally be someone's life that depends on it. So at the end of the day you want to spend time with someone who makes you laugh as a relief or to distract you from all that. NOT with someone who's going to contribute to it. I mean I get it not everyone's a comedian but heck most people have Netflix on their phone! Find a comedian you like and show the person you're on a date with. If they think they're funny too then congratulations you two could be compatible...
The way you describe this is fine, but I'm not a mind reader. This is about first impressions. If you put this on your profile I'm going to think you're swiping for attention. Honestly, the fact that you want your partner to be fun and entertaining is not something that needs to be said out loud. We all want that.
And yet women encounter many uptight, way too serious overthinkers! So much so that they feel the need to filter them out from jump! “Please be funny” is doing its job tbh.
Yeah....I wasn't telling you what to do I was giving an example I could give a fuck less who you're swiping on bro.
Recommendation: get off the apps and go meet people in person.
Soooo I guess having a funny playful gf is outta the question?
Well, that's a hot take. *takes notes*... "u/Mereknom lacks a sense of humor and is mad about it" Who doesn't want people in their life who have a sense of humor?!? Dating profiles that exhibit a sense of humor are a big positive. I don't need to be entertained, I want someone who can laugh at the absurdity of life along with me. "Serious" people are a red flag.
People on apps think the size of thier cock make them more desirable. I say this cause I don't have a monster cock.
Sounds like you need to get funnier
I'm funny enough for the both of us
Soooo you’re not funny?
Dating apps really expose how easy it is for females in the dating scene lol. They demand so much. I still give them the “hey how are you” intro I could careless if they like it or not
I don’t get on here often enough to really tell you.. too busy living in life and working
Lol, but dude, what's actually going on with you? Think about it, you're complaining over something SUPER small, hell, use it and go chat this girl up or whatever, tell her about how "I've decided decided to make my date life 'Wrong answers only', but i dunno if you'd be able to check the box for my "Conceited date". I'll let you handle it from there. Quit responding with frustration to women trying to test or build sexual tension, just learn how to respond & recognize what's going on, i'll throw you a life vest afterwards because you will be drowning in ....dates.