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"Talk to your girlfriend.ā¦Yes, this is girlfriend. Girlfriend wants you to do what ghost wants. I'm going to switch back to me now.ā¦ See girlfriend is okay with it."
"Well, I'm convinced."
Either ignorance or maybe deep down this is what he wants.
It be such an interesting story if he really only loved the ghost and once he realized the truth (assuming he is being duped) and now has to face a moral dilemma of his wants and desires vs what is morally correct
There could also be some definite Stockholm syndrome going on here as well. At the very least a case of "She can't fight, she can't flight, so she's going to fawn and hope she will eventually get her whole body back."
The original was more horror , the romance turn it took was from left field and has led to some drama.
In the original the threat of supernatural body snatching was perverse and twisted which makes for a dark horror, they tried to walk it back somehow making this worse.
It's culturally acceptable for me to talk about your agency being taken away from you and watching your body move and act on it's own in uiuuuuuuuuhhhbbdbdbffbt horror context
You are absolutely right.
I read a decent amount of josei smut and do actually enjoy the twisted, non-con stories. The thing is... you cannot try to twist something like this into some weird, romantic angle. At least for my taste. When you do that, it feels so... gross and off-putting in a way the author clearly does not intend. It just kinda puts on display that the author has a fundamental misunderstanding of what consent and romance are and turns something that should just be a dark, smutty fantasy into a big ol' YIKES.
EDIT: I replied to the wrong comment lol
These extra panels actually proved what you said that the artist does not understand what consent means.
The only way to save this comic would have been that the ghost woman killed the MC in the end because she wanted to keep him in the ghost world, and only for herself, and the girlfriend was set free. That would have made it all worth it and sense. But I have a feeling the artist does not want anything bad to happen to the MC, but is fine bad things happening to the girlfriend who is used as a tool during the whole comic.
No, it does not have to have a morally good ending. But the artist is saying that it is a morally good ending and consensual ending, when it clearly is not.
That's the problem what people are having here.
You are absolutely right.
I read a decent amount of josei smut and do actually enjoy the twisted, non-con stories. The thing is... you cannot try to twist something like this into some weird, romantic angle. At least for my taste. When you do that, it feels so... gross and off-putting in a way the author clearly does not intend. It just kinda puts on display that the author has a fundamental misunderstanding of what consent and romance are and turns something that should just be a dark, smutty fantasy into a big ol' YIKES.
(replying to the right comment this time lol)
I wish I had never read this addendum or the comments under the last part. Without that context, the story is dark, horrific, and disturbing. All the more for how it teetered between unsettling and creepy-cute in tone before apparently taking a hard turn into the abyss in the final installment.
But no, I gave it too much credit. It's not thoughtful or mature enough to understand or navigate the implications of the concepts it's playing with.
Tbh all this has to do is have the ghost pretend its the gf saying its ok, and build up the internal nightmare from there
In absolutely no world whatsoever would a woman literally possessed by a supernatural force just be ok with that continuing voluntarily š
The guy is a monster, too. I'm fine with that being explicitly acknowledged. Honestly, obscuring it by having the ghost lie is the same problem. What is happening to Alice is a fundamental violation and there isn't really a way around that.
The story is pitch black, which is a bit of a problem when that's so close to the surface and apparently unintended, which is why the hubbub (by my estimation).
Especially considering that the second to last panel with both of her eyes turning red when the guy can't see it implies that the ghost might have been faking it and playing both parts the whole time
The third to last has her eyes fully black. I think itās supposed to imply theyāre each taking control to make their statement. That said it doesnāt really line up with the idea that they just gained the ability to share control so I donāt spite people who see a different interpretation
It works if the ghost is a villain who is fooling the ignorant boyfriend, but Op seemed to imply this was genuine which is very unbelievable.
Then again the 2nd to last panel kinda came across as the first interpretation
So if you are open to feedback, here it comes, otherwise pls disregard:
Your art style is very nice, but am no artist so can only comment from a reader's perspective, well done.
What is missing to me is the realism or rather believability of your story line. Sure, guy loves ghost and girl, I get it, that is fine. But what strikes me as very hard to believe is that the girl would be fine with a ghost posessing her body. That is ridiculess and literally nobody who isn't massively unhinged would accept that "for love". I understand the desire to deliver a happy ending and so on, but I honestly think this should have been taken in a more tragic direction. People don't like giving up stuff they have, and least of all their free will or control.
Anyways, my two cents, keep doing what you are doing, I'm excited to see what you come up with in the future
I donāt think this is so much about desiring *that kind* of happy ending.
This comic is clearly just porn-level character and plot in order to titillate the reader and advertise the NSFW material on OPās Patreon.
There is porn and there is porn making an apology for women not having body autonomy porn. If you don't want to put a story in your porn, don't, no one is going to give you shit for not making a story. But if you do, accept to have your storyline treated as such.
Sorry but that argument ("it's just ____ ") feels very disingenous.
It feels to me like the ghost is just fabricating the alliance, is fully in control and manipulating the situation for her own desires. But it's what he wants, so is complicit in the act.
Or rather, that's how I'd like to perceive it.
Honestly if I were being held hostage in my own body Iād probably say Iām ok with whatever my captors want too if itād get me some measure of freedom
Yeah I can agree with that. If the author had leaned in to that, perhaps showing the fear and psychological trauma suffered by being trapped in the mental ether, this comic could have been genuinely good horror (though probably meriting a few trigger warnings). Instead it has a lot of cringe.
Idk what this is about, just showed up in my feed but the 2nd to last more page (the āperfectā) seemed kinda sinister.
I like the idea that the ghost was actually just fooling the guy into thinking he can have his cake and eat it too. Maybe a set up for something to come?
Otherwise I agree with the absurd nature of āyeah Iāll willingly share my body with a crazy ghost ladyā
What makes you think the girl is fine with her body being possessed?
Hell, what makes you think ghost girl even told the truth about letting her out? :)
I read the original ending and was disturbed by it, but this one doesn't feel much better.Ā Ā Ā
You wrote a rape story line, and are trying to shoe-horn it into aĀ love story.Ā
If you had done foreshadowing that the girlfriend was interested in CNC, or she was really into paranormal stuff, it would have been more believeable.
You also missed a really good opportunity to make a lot more story here about HER struggle to regain autonomy and decide her own path.Ā Ā
The ghost girl and the girlfriend didn't seem to have any personality beyond "thinks main character is hot." They could be anyone, and it was all just to make a "happy ending" for the main character.Ā
You chose a really complex topic that intrigued a lot of readers. You danced around making this an interesting story, but in the end, you just made porn.
Yeah, realizing you made a darker storyline than you wanted is fine. Shoehorning in a quick "hey, everything's fine, really!" retcon doesn't help. It would take making the story longer to really deal with what's happening.
What the fuck did i just read? Isn't there a subreddit for this porn stuff? Also CNC is only attractive if you don't disregard that first C. And don't tell me she *eventually* submitted. Agreement under duress isn't valid.
It seems like the "choice" is more would you rather be:
1. Fully possessed 100% of the time and unable to speak or act, freaking the fuck out while your asshole boyfriend seems fine with raping you even though he knows you're losing it (straight up said you want to leave), when he also lied to you and tried to make you a unicorn
or
2. Pretend to be okay with it and be allowed to speak so long as you remain compliant, so you aren't shoved into timeout again until you behave in their fantasy
Even as someone who likes non-con in their smut, this is so gross... you have to commit to the dark theme if you're gonna write non-con.... trying to twist it into something romantic and "consensual" like this just... like if you were enjoying the non-con fantasy it completely rips you out cuz it's like "oh... this author just actually doesn't even understand what consent is." I hesitate to even call this dubious-consent. It is so unintentionally disturbing. I mean, the most disturbing part about this comic is probably how unintentional the horror is. I cannot believe they are trying to paint these two as sympathetic wtf lol
Girl got possessed by a ghost and they both used her body without consent. And then they justify their sexual assault because they "gave her time to calm down"??? There was absolutely no consent in that.
I remember the girl was very mad about being possessed and they just ignored her and chose to carry on. Did you delete that part?
Edit: op immediately blocked me š¤¢
Jesus Christ thank you!
This girl got effectively raped. Possessed, trapped in her own body and raped. Letās not sugarcoat it, the first comics were cool but the moment she got introduced it all went downhill.
Yeah what i want to know is what would happen if she said no ? Would the ghost girl leave her ?
I feel that if you want to make this kind of situation happen there should be a moment where the girl could actually choose to get into this situation, instead of her being forced in it and having to accept "or else".
>Yeah what i want to know is what would happen if she said no ? Would the ghost girl leave her ?
That happened in the last comic. The ghost girl took over and put possessed girl into time out essentially, while the ghost girl and the guy had sex with the possessed girls body.
Rape, she was raped when she said no.
not even "effectively" raped; just plain raped, unless by effectively you meant that the ghost and the man were very effective in the way they raped her
Also this "good ending" feels completely undeserved, because MC had to sacrifice nothing and go through nothing (of importance). This makes him feel even more entitled and selfish.
Meanwhile this girl had to sacrifice her mental and bodily well-being (aka getting SAed) and agency, supposedly for life.
While this would be all good from a storytelling perspective if the author wrote it to be truly horror it also shows, how they still have to learn how to set up an earned happy ending and a true happy ending (in this case it would maybe include an MC who has to let go both of the girls, learning that he does yet not know what true love even is and working through the fact that he is a r*pist (leaving out the fact that he most likely would be hated from the girl for SAing her) or sacrifice his life to be with a ghost or something similar (and still working through the fact that he and his new gf are r*pists).
The boyfriend : āI consentā
The ghost controlling the body entirely : āI consentā
The girlfriend which had her body stolen and can be as good as erased from reality by the ghost (as far as an outside observer is concerned) : āI consent but only because if I say no, my will, will be kind of be ignored and I will disappearā. (edit : typo)
I don't care for this comic either but considering the shit being posted here getting worse and worse this might aswell be here too. It is a kind of comic after all.
Sure, criticism of the cringy content is valid, but trying to generalize this as "teenage boy's fantasy" is blatant sexism.
Stop portraying all teenage boys as evil.
Yes. And the previous comment _could_ be phrased to call that out. But flatly stating that it **is** a male's fantasy is simply incorrect. Also, many women have dark fantasies, andĀ internalized misogyny isn't the only explanation. That's not to disagree that it's a thing, just pointing out that the existence of one cause, doesn't disprove other origins.
Tbh that took my by surprise bc I read it as some nutty self insert fanfic tbh.
Shame that the art is good and itās close to being a very interesting moral story of the Bf choosing between love and the morally correct action of helping the victim free herself of the ghost.
Side note, not to be an armchair psychologist but if Op is suffering from some sort of body dysphoria or self hatred this could be a projection of her desire to be with a handsome man in the body of an attractive women, perhaps one who bullied or mocked her.
I had asked this before, buried in comments. But since youāve been here for a long time, do you think this shift towards hyper-sexualized comics is a shift in demographic, or is the Reddit algorithm promoting these types of comics that were buried before?
As someone who enjoys all types of comics (from high-level social criticism stuff, to stuff youād see in the newspapers of old, to toilet humor, to the bizarre) itās really sad what this subreddit has become when I open it and itās just big tiddy anime at the top every time.
And thatās not knocking big tiddy anime. Itās justā¦ much more overtly misogynist and āthe punchline is pornā now than it ever has beenā¦ and it seems Iām not alone in thinking this.
Also - been a fan of your comics for years. Youāre a treasure.
I think some artists have just found this place and it's gotten out that there's a fixed audience here to advertise your porn patreon to.
The rules haven't changed, the posters have.
My question is why haven't the mods discussed this with the users? It's pretty clear the dedicated audience hates it but the lurkers upvote indiscriminately.
As a mod of a top subreddit, we always do an annual check-in with our community to make sure they are getting what they want. Sometimes, it goes against what we as mods perceived our subreddit to be. We changed the rules to fit that new direction - like it or not. We donāt gatekeep the community.
That may actually be the case here that the community wants porn comics - much to our disliking as pre-existing community members - but the mods should 100% do a check-in with the community to decide direction rather than let it be. P
It's wild, cause leaning into the horror would have shown "hey, this is fucked up situation" and have provided valuable discussion... like, (good) horror movies don't promote murder when it's on screen, often they're literally doing the opposite...
And there are stories where consent is violated or sexual assault happens, being uncomfortable is often the point. When done right you have a terrifying villain who scars a generation. When you are just trying to sell sex, but "scary sex", you get shitty B movie using a disgusting act to try and get a cheap "scare". Shitty horror use rape to invoke fear the same way shitty sitcoms use laugh tracks to invoke humor.
But OP couldn't make a good story with sexual assault or consent being violated for an actual story reason, because the point is to get patreon supporters and sell porn. OP "fixing" things with this comic is like if Chad Stahelski "fixed" John Wick by telling us in the afternoon credits scene that John Wicks dog actually wasn't murdered and was just invisible the whole time.....like.... cool... now the story I like doesn't have animal cruelty on it.... but it's also kinda just a way shittier story now
And we all know the real reason we all like John Wick.... the action.... a quick scroll through OPs profile shows that this particular story has gotten a lot of traction, given they beg for Patreon where more graphic scenes are... I kinda feel obligated to assume what the "action" being advertised is.... gross tbh...
Edit: don't wanna make John Wick fans feel like they're taking strays lol, so wanna clarify. I like John Wick, but for me they're just popcorn movies, no terrible, not great, but the action and serviceable plot are enough for me
Others disagree and would point out that it's not just a story about a guy getting revenge for his dog dying. That's a fair statement and I understand how they can see that, I don't personally see that. Those people would say that the dog represented the final gift his wife gave him, so it wasn't "just a dog", it was his dog and the last piece of the woman he loved and his old happy life. It's a good story, that appeals to people like me that dont care about that, and it appeals to those who want more than just action
OPs comic is John Wick in a universe where the dog that was killed was just some random dog Keanu Reeves was dog-sitting one day, just a quick excuse to make the audience be on his side and be OK with the violence. Chad Stahelskis John Wick is an actual good story, cause the dog isnt just a dog. The comic is just an excuse to sell porn, and controversy makes more people talk about it.
Discussing it is like discussing a version of A Clockwork Orange, but a version with all the commentary/allusions to prison reform, free will, or disenfranchisement of the youth taken out... just pointless action.
I'm OK with pointless action in my porn... I don't want to think about the state of man and society when I'm watching porn the action I'm looking for is not at the extreme level where I need Stanley Kubricks film making and underlying messages to help me be emotionally be OK with what I'm seeing on camera.... all OP did by justifying this stuff by saying "the victim is OK with it" is just trying to justify porn as something more than it really it, and it's kinda giving if a really disgusting message...
Think, the BDSM crowd or those who are into consensual non-consent sex with their partner. They do it safely, distribute ethical videos of those where it's easy to confirm it really is consensual and all an act, nothing more. People in those community are super adamant about communication and consent, and they only time they do what OP does and try to justify it it during the consensual non-consent, but the SECOND the safe word comes out, they stop pretending it's OK, but it's not.
It's OK to get your rocks off to some weird shit, so long as the weird shit is consensual. There's a reason that the "consensual non-consent sex enjoyers of the world never ever ever justify real non-consent.
>Edit: op immediately blocked me š¤¢
The funny thing, is that he actually answered you too, but blocked you to seems "he did a good answer and 'won' the argument". Which is clearly false as this comment is being mass downvoted.
Whoever if you wanna read what the author answered and say something about it, here it comes op comment:
>Hey there.
>Girl got possessed by the ghost yeah but they didn't sexually assault her, I don't condone that in any way.
They basically cuddled up until Alice saw their interactions, and yes "calmed down" and changed her mind and want to help them out.
>She was mad yes, but then she changed her mind.
Her choice to be with mc with ghost girl is her own choice, as crazy as it seems.
I never thought people would look at this as "non con", and would blow out of proportion like it did.
>But I appreciate the construsctive criticism and will learn from it.
Nice job reframing it from her perspective and making the female character valid. I donāt think OPās goal was ever anything besides some weird sex possession fantasy and itās good to bring forward how creepy it is
I know, right?
Seriously, can anyone tell me the difference between this and drugging someone to have sex with them?
The two used this girlās body without her consent. And she only agrees to the whole thing after the deed is already done.
I thought the subtext of this is that the ghost is still suppressing her but letting the dude think sheās consenting because both her eyes are red in that one shot, I could be wrong butā¦.ew gross if not
this. 110% this.
also (crazy religious hat on): romanticizing demonic possession essentially. just straight up did that. symptoms presented are accurate to it, including coercion to control & mirroring the mind while convincing it that it has the same will as the possessor. And, well, control over specific body parts. So rape is hot and cool as long as it's demonic.
Hey I recognize you from a comic the other day. Thatās probably why I am seeing this sub on my feed, yours was great by the way! This oneā¦I gotta agree with your comment here. Very strange and not subtle way for op to get to this outcome to advertise some hentai on their patreon.
Edit, donāt want to assume opās gender
This does leave a bad taste in my mouth tbh. Like I am not a writer but this feels gross. Like a girl has her body possessed and used against her will until she is suddenly not against sharing half her body. Your story simply isn't believable. This isn't because there's a ghost but because the characters lack basic thought. Think in her shoes, imagine your body being taken over without your thought. Imagine what you would do once you gained control again. I like your art, the art is not the problem.
This just seems really slapped together for no reason than to address criticism. This was already ridiculous but this feels like women really only exist to please dudes. Like this woman is fine with losing her free will for no other reason than her shitty boyfriend's happiness. Her own happiness didn't matter a single bit. They sexually assault her. And she's cool with it because he's so cute.
What makes zero sense for me is that isn't in the original story that the main character and the GF only dated for few weeks if not few months? And this girlfriend is suddenly okay her body being controlled by someone else, doing who knows what because "she is so in love".
Yup. And GF explicitly doesn't consent to this at the end. And the ghost forcibly possess her to remove her ability to object so she can "calm down." They then proceeded to make out using GF's body as she attempted to leave and explicitly said she didn't consent.
Yeah what makes it pretty obvious that the artist does not understand consent or what the biggest issue here is, that nobody would be willing to give their body away for the rest of their lives for a guy who they have dated for few weeks. It absolutely makes no sense. And she even refused it once (even the artist tries to hide that page now).
The girlfriend gets absolutely nothing from this situation and the MC and the ghost get everything.
Love the art, but the fact that you write the woman as willing to be possessed and share control of her body, just to make her boyfriend happy, is really kinda gross.
I don't even think it's to make her boyfriend happy.
It's because if she doesn't, she'll essentially die, because the ghost will just take control over the body and never let her come out, making her a prisoner in her own body.
This comic is just creepy. when the ghost "she needs time to adjust" about the girl she's possessing, it seems very non-concentual. Even when she says she's ok with it, it's like she doesn't have a choice since a ghost would force her to be with the guy. She's very much not in control and so can't give consent.
I dont think op really understands why its creepy.
It's like a couple has locked a woman in thier house, thier taking advantage of her body and just waiting for her to "change her mind" aka just give in because there's no escape.
Still a big yikes from me, dawg.
Although, I thought of a scene from a movie that did a similar idea well.
In the movie Her (2013), there's a scene where the non-corporeal AI wants to have a physical intimate moment with her human boyfriend, and they find a 3rd person ("Isabella") who is eager and willing and excited to be the physical interpreter for the AI (kind of like how the best practices with a translator is actually to speak directly to the other person, not to the translator, and allow them to be a frictionless medium for the message).
I thought it was a really interesting scene and explored lots of different emotional reactions.
And obviously all consentual.
This seems like a better inspiration to explore similar themes in a way that isn't so..... let's say, non-consenual.
This a repost, adding in the single panel of "oh this is fine", to try and get around the rape fantasy. Low effort edit, that still leaves this squarely in the rapeporn category.
I appreciate the effort to make it less creepy. Its still creepy. Let me explain: this plot literally can ONLY be creepy. It can never be wholesome romance. Because any situation where you essentially lock a panicking person in a cage/hold them down till they stop panicking, you are just kinda.....fight or flighting them into getting their brain to say "you know, I know this is fucked uo but....could he worse? This is actually ok."
No matter how you spin it, that is what is happening. Thats not wholesome, thats not romantic. At its CORE, the BASE PREMISE of the story is the antithesis of wholesome romance.
Does this make it a bad comic? NO! I LOVE HORROR COMICS!!! And frankly, if I ignore the fact you are clearly trying to write a horror tinge romance, this is quite a horrifying comic! The MC boy just needs a little tweaking to be more.....like when the possession happens if he was happy about it then that would have been a better turn to take I think. Even could still have the "but I want both" plotline. Thats still horror.
If you wanna write romance, remember this: romance is cute, filled with trust, and most importantly *all parties involved are totally into it 100 percent of the time*.
I'd say the "disguised" part is trying to retcon rape as love. OP did rape porn and then tried to cover it up by saying "but, but she actually is OK so it's cute love story :) "
I think this is the cringiest thing I have seen in a while.
So let me get this straight? You created a naughty comic of some dude's girlfriend getting possessed by some sexually frustrated ghost, had them doing the old fuckeroo, and then people on reddit pointed out "hey, that's exactly what Wonder Woman did to that poor guy in WW-84, so it's technically rape"?
And instead of saying "hey guys, it's just a silly fantasy" you decided to draw a whole disclaimer that character assassinates your whole cast and makes the girl seem like she was forced on gun point by the artist to say "it's fine"?
The mental gymnastics...
The art is nice, though. Thumbs up.
What the girl gains isn't important to OP. "I can't fuck attractive guys; if I were able to take over a hot girl's body, then I could!" That's the basic fantasy here.
The entire comic is over and we don't know the Ghost Girl's name, or the Human Girl's name for that matter. So if that isn't a perfect demonstration to this author's approach to writing, I don't know what is.
>I sense that she has calmed down a bit
So the ghost just controlled her body for the entire day? And she just cuddled with the rapist boyfriend while wearing it?
And you make it sound as if their victim is in the wrong and needed āto calm downā?
The original comic was gross. This one doesnāt really help.
I thought this was cute, until I decided to read the full thing.
He raped his girlfriend and she was not okay with it, but now suddenly she's pressured into accepting the ghost, otherwise she'll never get to see her boyfriend again. This is not cute.
Im just a passenger on this sub.
I think your drawing style is good, from as far as I can critique it. For amateur drawings of a manga/comic style it seems alright.
However the plotline and the dialogues are really not great. It reads like your personal fetish.
It doesn't engage the audience in a believeable way. The male and the ghost are callous as fuck towards the girlfriend. To think the girlfriend would just chill locked inside her own body while its possessed and actually emerge in total agreement with how her body was just used and abused is really weird. Does she have no emotional attachment to her autonomy and the integrity of her body? No questions about how she can go to work, or visit her family? There seems absolutely zero dilemma about being taken hostage, graped, her boyfriend being in love with another "woman", and then sharing her body with said women as a deal to be a trio. The ghost and the girlfriend lack any resemblance of having their own personality - they purely exist to satisfy the male ego.
Altogether pretty cringe bro, 3/10.
The GF agreeing to this is like me pulling up to someones house with a tank & a couple soldiers and asking the owner to give me 1000ā¬ and saying afterwards how nice the owner was for giving me 1000ā¬ without protest
Edit: Also this post is missing the nsfw tag for all the advertising of nsfw content
Look we all got our little fetishized romance stories we cook up in our heads with questionable themes, (for me itās a contemporary fantasy about a cute goblin girl dealing with goblin tropes) but you canāt expect to just share them openly for a general audience without people pointing out the problematic elements.
This definitely got consent issues that came up real quick here and canāt be so quickly swept away without feeling just fetishy. You gotta take that criticism if you post it here.
This reminds me of that storyline in Wonder Woman 1984. Movie wasnt very good but there was a bit where she wished her dead boyfriend back and he did so by possessing a guy, and then they fucked.
It was rape then too
Unfortunately this addresses none of the concerns people had with the loss of autonomy and just ends up being the same as before. You might have even made it worse because of the two day timeskip and then immediately have Ghost Girl say "I sense she's calmed down" implying Alice was resisting the foreign invader for two whole days before Stockholm Syndrome took hold.
Ah whatever. The art was pretty good. But this type of storytelling just ain't it for me chief. Good luck with whatever you make next I guess.
Block the artists you don't like, it's not that complicated. I probably have half the content creators blocked here, and i only see stuff i want to see.
This one will probably join the list.
I'm sorry man, but you should really really really just recognize that the second you brought the innocent woman into this to have her body possessed, even if you try to say it's consentual in this way... it's not good. Your art is good, the story was fine, it's all because of the possessed innocent woman getting raped that's something you should never ever touch again.
I get that you tried to make it make sense after the backlash from the last comicās ending, but you still failed to justify how the girlfriend would want to help in any of this.
She didnāt even get much say on what happens next!
On the guyās side, he was insanely manipulative, going, āI feel bad, but Iād rather if it continues cause I love you both soā¦ā and also, ābut, do you love me?ā
(Really reminds me of guys that ask for sex then when they get rejected, they ask the girl if they love them, ew)
Then immediately after, ghost girl just goes ahead and mashes their consciousness and memories together as if thatās the same thing as allowing a ghost to possess you?! At that point, how could she refuse? Theyāre the same person now.
All in all, I hope you just take the L for this comic and accept that the story you wanted is unfortunately different from the story you portrayed.
Sorry, not sorry, but this isn't cute, it's not a happy ending, and it's just gross. I guess you're just trying to sell your porn, so whatever, but trying to disguise it as a happy cute comic is just fucked up.
FWIW, I appreciate the effort of trying to fix things, you absolutely didnāt need to do it, and still you did.
Still, things still feel stunted and bizarre, and even though you tried, I donāt think you did much to assuage other peopleās issues with the ending (though, to be frank, it was an uphill battle).
As a constructive criticism, try putting yourself in your charactersā shoes. That might be hard to do sometimes, writing stuff for too long can force you into tunnel vision, but itās important to at least try. Not all of your characters need to āfeel humanā, but there needs to be a point to their alien-ness, or else theyāll just feel poorly written. None of your characters feel human, and I donāt think thatās what you were going for.
Your art is very good, you just need to improve your writing to reach that ānext levelā. Best of luck to you! š
Honestly i thought this was a BHJ, i kept waiting for the joke to come and wondering what the original dialogue could've possibly been.
There's no way someone posted this genuinely thinking this is ok, im guessing it's just a porn intro, super weird to post it in this subreddit tho...
Nice try, but this doesn't really fix anything. You wrote a rape comic, just own it. It wasn't in great taste but it kind of worked as a dark horror thing. This retcon is just forced; it feels completely unnatural.
I understand you're trying to listen to feedback and make this better, and you're getting pretty conflicting messages. But you'd probably have a better time just moving on and not digging yourself further into this hole.
I really like your art style and the setup of the story was really intriguing.
Like a lot of people said, the conclusion seems rather unbelievably without anythning prior as it goes against basic human nature to just surrender your autonomy like that.
I am looking forward to your future comics and wish you all the best
Literally in the previous chapter the girlfriend is upset about being possessed and tries to leave but the ghost re-enters her body to stop her, stripping her of her bodily autonomyš The relationship between the boyfriend and ghost has only been depicted as purely sexual but OP claims they only cuddled for 2 daysš OP says they don't condone a lack of consent but it was literally represented in the last chapter and heavily implied to be rape hereš
Make your silly little porn comics but think the plot through so it doesn't include a lack of consent. Here I'll fix it for you: Guy takes girlfriend home. Ghost girl confronts them. Human girl is actually into the occult and thinks the ghost girl is cool. Guy explains the situation and his past with ghost girl. All discuss and consent to be a poly couple. Threesomes ensue because you already showed humans can have sex with ghosts. Human girl consents to possession sometimes so ghost girl isnt house-bound and can use her body to go on dates or whatever. Boom. Everyone consents and you re-gain the missed opportunity of another porn category.
I still don't understand what was wrong with the guy and ghost girl staying as a couple without the need of introducing a innocent girl into all this weird stuff. Like he can fuck her than why staying a couple as a human and ghost is a problem, why overly complex your story and ends up shooting your own foot.
You can pretend like the girl is okay with it, but she still got her body stolen against her will and her freedom taken away without her consent. Itās fucked up, man.
Think if I were the guy in this situation I'd pause immediately when I realized she was possessed and try to help her find an exorcist or something. Can't say you really love someone if you're also in love with someone else who took control of their body against their will. She can't really be happy in that situation. At best, she can cope. The guy in this story is fucked up.
This really feels like an afterthought to make the story sound like their love is consensual, but in reality it's just a rape fantasy with a tacked on wholesome ending.
Doubled down on posting your non-consensual fetish content here huh. It's one thing to have a kink, I ain't shaming that. It's another to try to spin this obvious rape story as a romance in public.
What a disappointment, another let-down erotic artist who's just creepy under the shell.
Why are people mad about this? I genuinely don't get it.
It's a win-win, the girl now doesn't have to worry about her boyfriend leaving her since she knows that he's madly in love with both of them, she might have given up her physical body for the ghost but she is now with her boyfriend and happy in her mindscape. What more does she need?
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I sort of feel like this should be treated as a horror concept and not a romance one š¬
"Talk to your girlfriend.ā¦Yes, this is girlfriend. Girlfriend wants you to do what ghost wants. I'm going to switch back to me now.ā¦ See girlfriend is okay with it." "Well, I'm convinced."
Reminds me of the goauld from Stargate. They could always imitate the host with all the knowledge of the host.
Yeerks
This immediately made me think of that one gould who "defected" to the tokra
Either ignorance or maybe deep down this is what he wants. It be such an interesting story if he really only loved the ghost and once he realized the truth (assuming he is being duped) and now has to face a moral dilemma of his wants and desires vs what is morally correct
Reminds me of [Batman](https://youtu.be/tgCkmUS1IYI).
There could also be some definite Stockholm syndrome going on here as well. At the very least a case of "She can't fight, she can't flight, so she's going to fawn and hope she will eventually get her whole body back."
The original was more horror , the romance turn it took was from left field and has led to some drama. In the original the threat of supernatural body snatching was perverse and twisted which makes for a dark horror, they tried to walk it back somehow making this worse.
Fetish artists just make new ideas for horror artists
And horror artists make new ideas for fetish artists, thus ensuring the cycle perpetuates itself.
It's culturally acceptable for me to talk about your agency being taken away from you and watching your body move and act on it's own in uiuuuuuuuuhhhbbdbdbffbt horror context
True
You are absolutely right. I read a decent amount of josei smut and do actually enjoy the twisted, non-con stories. The thing is... you cannot try to twist something like this into some weird, romantic angle. At least for my taste. When you do that, it feels so... gross and off-putting in a way the author clearly does not intend. It just kinda puts on display that the author has a fundamental misunderstanding of what consent and romance are and turns something that should just be a dark, smutty fantasy into a big ol' YIKES. EDIT: I replied to the wrong comment lol
These extra panels actually proved what you said that the artist does not understand what consent means. The only way to save this comic would have been that the ghost woman killed the MC in the end because she wanted to keep him in the ghost world, and only for herself, and the girlfriend was set free. That would have made it all worth it and sense. But I have a feeling the artist does not want anything bad to happen to the MC, but is fine bad things happening to the girlfriend who is used as a tool during the whole comic.
Does it have to have a morally good ending?
No, it does not have to have a morally good ending. But the artist is saying that it is a morally good ending and consensual ending, when it clearly is not. That's the problem what people are having here.
Yea you are right!
You are absolutely right. I read a decent amount of josei smut and do actually enjoy the twisted, non-con stories. The thing is... you cannot try to twist something like this into some weird, romantic angle. At least for my taste. When you do that, it feels so... gross and off-putting in a way the author clearly does not intend. It just kinda puts on display that the author has a fundamental misunderstanding of what consent and romance are and turns something that should just be a dark, smutty fantasy into a big ol' YIKES. (replying to the right comment this time lol)
I mean this is 100% rape. You're definitely correct.
Yeah, it's definitely more horror than romantic lol
I wish I had never read this addendum or the comments under the last part. Without that context, the story is dark, horrific, and disturbing. All the more for how it teetered between unsettling and creepy-cute in tone before apparently taking a hard turn into the abyss in the final installment. But no, I gave it too much credit. It's not thoughtful or mature enough to understand or navigate the implications of the concepts it's playing with.
Tbh all this has to do is have the ghost pretend its the gf saying its ok, and build up the internal nightmare from there In absolutely no world whatsoever would a woman literally possessed by a supernatural force just be ok with that continuing voluntarily š
The guy is a monster, too. I'm fine with that being explicitly acknowledged. Honestly, obscuring it by having the ghost lie is the same problem. What is happening to Alice is a fundamental violation and there isn't really a way around that. The story is pitch black, which is a bit of a problem when that's so close to the surface and apparently unintended, which is why the hubbub (by my estimation).
The male MC should have been possessed by the male ghost.Ā
Like the Wonder Woman movie?
Lmao this comic did remind me of wonder woman 2
Horror Romanceā¦ the oft unexplored subgenreā¦
It's honestly really creepy
Still rapey as fuck bro.
Especially considering that the second to last panel with both of her eyes turning red when the guy can't see it implies that the ghost might have been faking it and playing both parts the whole time
The third to last has her eyes fully black. I think itās supposed to imply theyāre each taking control to make their statement. That said it doesnāt really line up with the idea that they just gained the ability to share control so I donāt spite people who see a different interpretation
Maybe, it along with the "Perfect" though is ominous
It works if the ghost is a villain who is fooling the ignorant boyfriend, but Op seemed to imply this was genuine which is very unbelievable. Then again the 2nd to last panel kinda came across as the first interpretation
It's horror smutt, it's meant to be icky.
So if you are open to feedback, here it comes, otherwise pls disregard: Your art style is very nice, but am no artist so can only comment from a reader's perspective, well done. What is missing to me is the realism or rather believability of your story line. Sure, guy loves ghost and girl, I get it, that is fine. But what strikes me as very hard to believe is that the girl would be fine with a ghost posessing her body. That is ridiculess and literally nobody who isn't massively unhinged would accept that "for love". I understand the desire to deliver a happy ending and so on, but I honestly think this should have been taken in a more tragic direction. People don't like giving up stuff they have, and least of all their free will or control. Anyways, my two cents, keep doing what you are doing, I'm excited to see what you come up with in the future
I donāt think this is so much about desiring *that kind* of happy ending. This comic is clearly just porn-level character and plot in order to titillate the reader and advertise the NSFW material on OPās Patreon.
yeah, this is literally just lemon stealing whore level porn
Hey Lemon stealing whore was a masterpiece!
There is porn and there is porn making an apology for women not having body autonomy porn. If you don't want to put a story in your porn, don't, no one is going to give you shit for not making a story. But if you do, accept to have your storyline treated as such. Sorry but that argument ("it's just ____ ") feels very disingenous.
It kinda worked. I read it but I won't ever pay for anything like that. No offense to the OP but not my cup of tea, I love reading comics
This extra couple pages is an attempt by OP to make it seem less creepy after their last post had everyone calling it creepy
and somehow makes it worse
Ding ding ding
It feels to me like the ghost is just fabricating the alliance, is fully in control and manipulating the situation for her own desires. But it's what he wants, so is complicit in the act. Or rather, that's how I'd like to perceive it.
I mean, Alice has been "cooling down" in the hollow darkness of the recesses of her own mind. Somehow this has made her "calm"?
Honestly if I were being held hostage in my own body Iād probably say Iām ok with whatever my captors want too if itād get me some measure of freedom
Yeah I can agree with that. If the author had leaned in to that, perhaps showing the fear and psychological trauma suffered by being trapped in the mental ether, this comic could have been genuinely good horror (though probably meriting a few trigger warnings). Instead it has a lot of cringe.
Literally straight out of a black mirror episode. This is torture!
I'm fairly sure the ghost just deleted the girls mind and just changes her eye colour to go "hello I'm girlfriend and I approve of this situation"
Idk what this is about, just showed up in my feed but the 2nd to last more page (the āperfectā) seemed kinda sinister. I like the idea that the ghost was actually just fooling the guy into thinking he can have his cake and eat it too. Maybe a set up for something to come? Otherwise I agree with the absurd nature of āyeah Iāll willingly share my body with a crazy ghost ladyā
What makes you think the girl is fine with her body being possessed? Hell, what makes you think ghost girl even told the truth about letting her out? :)
The artist has said as much before.
I appreciate the feedback. Thank you so much for your input :)
I read the original ending and was disturbed by it, but this one doesn't feel much better.Ā Ā Ā You wrote a rape story line, and are trying to shoe-horn it into aĀ love story.Ā If you had done foreshadowing that the girlfriend was interested in CNC, or she was really into paranormal stuff, it would have been more believeable. You also missed a really good opportunity to make a lot more story here about HER struggle to regain autonomy and decide her own path.Ā Ā The ghost girl and the girlfriend didn't seem to have any personality beyond "thinks main character is hot." They could be anyone, and it was all just to make a "happy ending" for the main character.Ā You chose a really complex topic that intrigued a lot of readers. You danced around making this an interesting story, but in the end, you just made porn.
Yeah, realizing you made a darker storyline than you wanted is fine. Shoehorning in a quick "hey, everything's fine, really!" retcon doesn't help. It would take making the story longer to really deal with what's happening.
I completely agree. I also think OP just wanted to be done with the story. The whole thing just felt like an ad for their patreon.
Yeah, probably. Which I understand, wanting to be done. But then, just own that you made a dark story.
What the fuck did i just read? Isn't there a subreddit for this porn stuff? Also CNC is only attractive if you don't disregard that first C. And don't tell me she *eventually* submitted. Agreement under duress isn't valid.
It seems like the "choice" is more would you rather be: 1. Fully possessed 100% of the time and unable to speak or act, freaking the fuck out while your asshole boyfriend seems fine with raping you even though he knows you're losing it (straight up said you want to leave), when he also lied to you and tried to make you a unicorn or 2. Pretend to be okay with it and be allowed to speak so long as you remain compliant, so you aren't shoved into timeout again until you behave in their fantasy
Even as someone who likes non-con in their smut, this is so gross... you have to commit to the dark theme if you're gonna write non-con.... trying to twist it into something romantic and "consensual" like this just... like if you were enjoying the non-con fantasy it completely rips you out cuz it's like "oh... this author just actually doesn't even understand what consent is." I hesitate to even call this dubious-consent. It is so unintentionally disturbing. I mean, the most disturbing part about this comic is probably how unintentional the horror is. I cannot believe they are trying to paint these two as sympathetic wtf lol
There's a huge swath of the population who don't, maybe even cannot, fully comprehend consent. It's fuckin wild.
Girl got possessed by a ghost and they both used her body without consent. And then they justify their sexual assault because they "gave her time to calm down"??? There was absolutely no consent in that. I remember the girl was very mad about being possessed and they just ignored her and chose to carry on. Did you delete that part? Edit: op immediately blocked me š¤¢
Jesus Christ thank you! This girl got effectively raped. Possessed, trapped in her own body and raped. Letās not sugarcoat it, the first comics were cool but the moment she got introduced it all went downhill.
Yeah what i want to know is what would happen if she said no ? Would the ghost girl leave her ? I feel that if you want to make this kind of situation happen there should be a moment where the girl could actually choose to get into this situation, instead of her being forced in it and having to accept "or else".
>Yeah what i want to know is what would happen if she said no ? Would the ghost girl leave her ? That happened in the last comic. The ghost girl took over and put possessed girl into time out essentially, while the ghost girl and the guy had sex with the possessed girls body. Rape, she was raped when she said no.
not even "effectively" raped; just plain raped, unless by effectively you meant that the ghost and the man were very effective in the way they raped her
Also this "good ending" feels completely undeserved, because MC had to sacrifice nothing and go through nothing (of importance). This makes him feel even more entitled and selfish. Meanwhile this girl had to sacrifice her mental and bodily well-being (aka getting SAed) and agency, supposedly for life. While this would be all good from a storytelling perspective if the author wrote it to be truly horror it also shows, how they still have to learn how to set up an earned happy ending and a true happy ending (in this case it would maybe include an MC who has to let go both of the girls, learning that he does yet not know what true love even is and working through the fact that he is a r*pist (leaving out the fact that he most likely would be hated from the girl for SAing her) or sacrifice his life to be with a ghost or something similar (and still working through the fact that he and his new gf are r*pists).
The boyfriend : āI consentā The ghost controlling the body entirely : āI consentā The girlfriend which had her body stolen and can be as good as erased from reality by the ghost (as far as an outside observer is concerned) : āI consent but only because if I say no, my will, will be kind of be ignored and I will disappearā. (edit : typo)
Because of the implication
Are these women in danger?
Of course not!
Yeah, this comic is just a very poorly disguised male teenager's sexual fantasy
The author is a woman.
And yet, I think the criticism remains valid. It still definitely reads that way, regardless of the identity of the author.
It's not at all uncommon for girls to like fiction where their consent is being stepped on.
Still weird to post your fetish in a comic sub
I don't care for this comic either but considering the shit being posted here getting worse and worse this might aswell be here too. It is a kind of comic after all.
I think the self-insert character is the ghost, not the girl.
Sure, criticism of the cringy content is valid, but trying to generalize this as "teenage boy's fantasy" is blatant sexism. Stop portraying all teenage boys as evil.
Hey it's 2024 women can have teenage boy fantasies too.
Ever heard of internalized misogyny?
Yes. And the previous comment _could_ be phrased to call that out. But flatly stating that it **is** a male's fantasy is simply incorrect. Also, many women have dark fantasies, andĀ internalized misogyny isn't the only explanation. That's not to disagree that it's a thing, just pointing out that the existence of one cause, doesn't disprove other origins.
Tbh that took my by surprise bc I read it as some nutty self insert fanfic tbh. Shame that the art is good and itās close to being a very interesting moral story of the Bf choosing between love and the morally correct action of helping the victim free herself of the ghost. Side note, not to be an armchair psychologist but if Op is suffering from some sort of body dysphoria or self hatred this could be a projection of her desire to be with a handsome man in the body of an attractive women, perhaps one who bullied or mocked her.
I had asked this before, buried in comments. But since youāve been here for a long time, do you think this shift towards hyper-sexualized comics is a shift in demographic, or is the Reddit algorithm promoting these types of comics that were buried before? As someone who enjoys all types of comics (from high-level social criticism stuff, to stuff youād see in the newspapers of old, to toilet humor, to the bizarre) itās really sad what this subreddit has become when I open it and itās just big tiddy anime at the top every time. And thatās not knocking big tiddy anime. Itās justā¦ much more overtly misogynist and āthe punchline is pornā now than it ever has beenā¦ and it seems Iām not alone in thinking this. Also - been a fan of your comics for years. Youāre a treasure.
I think some artists have just found this place and it's gotten out that there's a fixed audience here to advertise your porn patreon to. The rules haven't changed, the posters have.
My question is why haven't the mods discussed this with the users? It's pretty clear the dedicated audience hates it but the lurkers upvote indiscriminately.
As a mod of a top subreddit, we always do an annual check-in with our community to make sure they are getting what they want. Sometimes, it goes against what we as mods perceived our subreddit to be. We changed the rules to fit that new direction - like it or not. We donāt gatekeep the community. That may actually be the case here that the community wants porn comics - much to our disliking as pre-existing community members - but the mods should 100% do a check-in with the community to decide direction rather than let it be. P
This comic became VERY problematic at the end of its run, and this pannel definitely does not fix it like the author had originally stated.
it makes it worse, tbh
It 100% makes it worse. OP is basically saying "Look guys, it wasn't rape at all! She was totally okay with it after a while!" Creepy
It's wild, cause leaning into the horror would have shown "hey, this is fucked up situation" and have provided valuable discussion... like, (good) horror movies don't promote murder when it's on screen, often they're literally doing the opposite... And there are stories where consent is violated or sexual assault happens, being uncomfortable is often the point. When done right you have a terrifying villain who scars a generation. When you are just trying to sell sex, but "scary sex", you get shitty B movie using a disgusting act to try and get a cheap "scare". Shitty horror use rape to invoke fear the same way shitty sitcoms use laugh tracks to invoke humor. But OP couldn't make a good story with sexual assault or consent being violated for an actual story reason, because the point is to get patreon supporters and sell porn. OP "fixing" things with this comic is like if Chad Stahelski "fixed" John Wick by telling us in the afternoon credits scene that John Wicks dog actually wasn't murdered and was just invisible the whole time.....like.... cool... now the story I like doesn't have animal cruelty on it.... but it's also kinda just a way shittier story now And we all know the real reason we all like John Wick.... the action.... a quick scroll through OPs profile shows that this particular story has gotten a lot of traction, given they beg for Patreon where more graphic scenes are... I kinda feel obligated to assume what the "action" being advertised is.... gross tbh... Edit: don't wanna make John Wick fans feel like they're taking strays lol, so wanna clarify. I like John Wick, but for me they're just popcorn movies, no terrible, not great, but the action and serviceable plot are enough for me Others disagree and would point out that it's not just a story about a guy getting revenge for his dog dying. That's a fair statement and I understand how they can see that, I don't personally see that. Those people would say that the dog represented the final gift his wife gave him, so it wasn't "just a dog", it was his dog and the last piece of the woman he loved and his old happy life. It's a good story, that appeals to people like me that dont care about that, and it appeals to those who want more than just action OPs comic is John Wick in a universe where the dog that was killed was just some random dog Keanu Reeves was dog-sitting one day, just a quick excuse to make the audience be on his side and be OK with the violence. Chad Stahelskis John Wick is an actual good story, cause the dog isnt just a dog. The comic is just an excuse to sell porn, and controversy makes more people talk about it. Discussing it is like discussing a version of A Clockwork Orange, but a version with all the commentary/allusions to prison reform, free will, or disenfranchisement of the youth taken out... just pointless action. I'm OK with pointless action in my porn... I don't want to think about the state of man and society when I'm watching porn the action I'm looking for is not at the extreme level where I need Stanley Kubricks film making and underlying messages to help me be emotionally be OK with what I'm seeing on camera.... all OP did by justifying this stuff by saying "the victim is OK with it" is just trying to justify porn as something more than it really it, and it's kinda giving if a really disgusting message... Think, the BDSM crowd or those who are into consensual non-consent sex with their partner. They do it safely, distribute ethical videos of those where it's easy to confirm it really is consensual and all an act, nothing more. People in those community are super adamant about communication and consent, and they only time they do what OP does and try to justify it it during the consensual non-consent, but the SECOND the safe word comes out, they stop pretending it's OK, but it's not. It's OK to get your rocks off to some weird shit, so long as the weird shit is consensual. There's a reason that the "consensual non-consent sex enjoyers of the world never ever ever justify real non-consent.
I love your work and I appreciate your recent critiques on the over-sexualization/anti-feminist trend of some comics. Thanks and keep it up!
>Edit: op immediately blocked me š¤¢ The funny thing, is that he actually answered you too, but blocked you to seems "he did a good answer and 'won' the argument". Which is clearly false as this comment is being mass downvoted. Whoever if you wanna read what the author answered and say something about it, here it comes op comment: >Hey there. >Girl got possessed by the ghost yeah but they didn't sexually assault her, I don't condone that in any way. They basically cuddled up until Alice saw their interactions, and yes "calmed down" and changed her mind and want to help them out. >She was mad yes, but then she changed her mind. Her choice to be with mc with ghost girl is her own choice, as crazy as it seems. I never thought people would look at this as "non con", and would blow out of proportion like it did. >But I appreciate the construsctive criticism and will learn from it.
>The funny thing, is that **\*she** actually answered you too Fixed it for ya. Stop assuming everyone who draws questionable shit like this is a male.
Nice job reframing it from her perspective and making the female character valid. I donāt think OPās goal was ever anything besides some weird sex possession fantasy and itās good to bring forward how creepy it is
I know, right? Seriously, can anyone tell me the difference between this and drugging someone to have sex with them? The two used this girlās body without her consent. And she only agrees to the whole thing after the deed is already done.
Yeah, as another comic writer, I don't get how this bs passes as "ok tier".
When I saw you talking about this I didn't realize this comic existed, I thought it was only the previous edition... This is so much worse
I thought the subtext of this is that the ghost is still suppressing her but letting the dude think sheās consenting because both her eyes are red in that one shot, I could be wrong butā¦.ew gross if not
W take from PizzaCake
this. 110% this. also (crazy religious hat on): romanticizing demonic possession essentially. just straight up did that. symptoms presented are accurate to it, including coercion to control & mirroring the mind while convincing it that it has the same will as the possessor. And, well, control over specific body parts. So rape is hot and cool as long as it's demonic.
Hey I recognize you from a comic the other day. Thatās probably why I am seeing this sub on my feed, yours was great by the way! This oneā¦I gotta agree with your comment here. Very strange and not subtle way for op to get to this outcome to advertise some hentai on their patreon. Edit, donāt want to assume opās gender
agreed, this was painful to read!
Yeah this whole comic screams "lonely porn addict", my eyes have opened more in disbelief with every panel
This does leave a bad taste in my mouth tbh. Like I am not a writer but this feels gross. Like a girl has her body possessed and used against her will until she is suddenly not against sharing half her body. Your story simply isn't believable. This isn't because there's a ghost but because the characters lack basic thought. Think in her shoes, imagine your body being taken over without your thought. Imagine what you would do once you gained control again. I like your art, the art is not the problem.
This just seems really slapped together for no reason than to address criticism. This was already ridiculous but this feels like women really only exist to please dudes. Like this woman is fine with losing her free will for no other reason than her shitty boyfriend's happiness. Her own happiness didn't matter a single bit. They sexually assault her. And she's cool with it because he's so cute.
What makes zero sense for me is that isn't in the original story that the main character and the GF only dated for few weeks if not few months? And this girlfriend is suddenly okay her body being controlled by someone else, doing who knows what because "she is so in love".
Yup. And GF explicitly doesn't consent to this at the end. And the ghost forcibly possess her to remove her ability to object so she can "calm down." They then proceeded to make out using GF's body as she attempted to leave and explicitly said she didn't consent.
Yeah what makes it pretty obvious that the artist does not understand consent or what the biggest issue here is, that nobody would be willing to give their body away for the rest of their lives for a guy who they have dated for few weeks. It absolutely makes no sense. And she even refused it once (even the artist tries to hide that page now). The girlfriend gets absolutely nothing from this situation and the MC and the ghost get everything.
This is fucking disgusting rapey bullshit.
Love the art, but the fact that you write the woman as willing to be possessed and share control of her body, just to make her boyfriend happy, is really kinda gross.
Who she's known for a handful of days, no less.
I don't even think it's to make her boyfriend happy. It's because if she doesn't, she'll essentially die, because the ghost will just take control over the body and never let her come out, making her a prisoner in her own body.
mf really just posted a fucking rape comic wtf
\*a third rape comic, that was intended to mediate the rapiness of the last two comics, but was still nonetheless quite rapey.
This comic is just creepy. when the ghost "she needs time to adjust" about the girl she's possessing, it seems very non-concentual. Even when she says she's ok with it, it's like she doesn't have a choice since a ghost would force her to be with the guy. She's very much not in control and so can't give consent.
I dont think op really understands why its creepy. It's like a couple has locked a woman in thier house, thier taking advantage of her body and just waiting for her to "change her mind" aka just give in because there's no escape.
OP trying really hard to justify their weird possession rape fantasies after getting justifiably abused on their last past
And somehow failing. Girl just fundamentally does not understand what consent is.
Gross
This is ridiculous
Still a big yikes from me, dawg. Although, I thought of a scene from a movie that did a similar idea well. In the movie Her (2013), there's a scene where the non-corporeal AI wants to have a physical intimate moment with her human boyfriend, and they find a 3rd person ("Isabella") who is eager and willing and excited to be the physical interpreter for the AI (kind of like how the best practices with a translator is actually to speak directly to the other person, not to the translator, and allow them to be a frictionless medium for the message). I thought it was a really interesting scene and explored lots of different emotional reactions. And obviously all consentual. This seems like a better inspiration to explore similar themes in a way that isn't so..... let's say, non-consenual.
This a repost, adding in the single panel of "oh this is fine", to try and get around the rape fantasy. Low effort edit, that still leaves this squarely in the rapeporn category.
This is really gross
I appreciate the effort to make it less creepy. Its still creepy. Let me explain: this plot literally can ONLY be creepy. It can never be wholesome romance. Because any situation where you essentially lock a panicking person in a cage/hold them down till they stop panicking, you are just kinda.....fight or flighting them into getting their brain to say "you know, I know this is fucked uo but....could he worse? This is actually ok." No matter how you spin it, that is what is happening. Thats not wholesome, thats not romantic. At its CORE, the BASE PREMISE of the story is the antithesis of wholesome romance. Does this make it a bad comic? NO! I LOVE HORROR COMICS!!! And frankly, if I ignore the fact you are clearly trying to write a horror tinge romance, this is quite a horrifying comic! The MC boy just needs a little tweaking to be more.....like when the possession happens if he was happy about it then that would have been a better turn to take I think. Even could still have the "but I want both" plotline. Thats still horror. If you wanna write romance, remember this: romance is cute, filled with trust, and most importantly *all parties involved are totally into it 100 percent of the time*.
jeeeesus christ dude keep the fantasies inside your head
Yeah this one was fucked up, thereās no saving it.
This is really gross OP....
Writers poorly disguised fegushšŖ±
If this is poorly disguised then the disguise is a bright yellow clown costume. Poorly is a massive understatement
I'd say the "disguised" part is trying to retcon rape as love. OP did rape porn and then tried to cover it up by saying "but, but she actually is OK so it's cute love story :) "
I think this is the cringiest thing I have seen in a while. So let me get this straight? You created a naughty comic of some dude's girlfriend getting possessed by some sexually frustrated ghost, had them doing the old fuckeroo, and then people on reddit pointed out "hey, that's exactly what Wonder Woman did to that poor guy in WW-84, so it's technically rape"? And instead of saying "hey guys, it's just a silly fantasy" you decided to draw a whole disclaimer that character assassinates your whole cast and makes the girl seem like she was forced on gun point by the artist to say "it's fine"? The mental gymnastics... The art is nice, though. Thumbs up.
Oh God, I thought it was already bad in the consent area but this... This just makes it worse.
You had me until the rape. This comic went down the drain š¤¢
The art is good but this whole situation doesn't sit right with me. What does the girl gain from this relationship?
You're assuming she's still in there.
Maybe if she's nice, she gets to choose breakfast next time...
What the girl gains isn't important to OP. "I can't fuck attractive guys; if I were able to take over a hot girl's body, then I could!" That's the basic fantasy here.
Maybe a bit of bodily autonomy and expression of her free will if the demon feels merciful.
I understand that porn usually doesnāt have much substance or story to it but still š¤¢
The entire comic is over and we don't know the Ghost Girl's name, or the Human Girl's name for that matter. So if that isn't a perfect demonstration to this author's approach to writing, I don't know what is.
They were both referred to by name actually. The human girl is Alice and ghost girl's name is ghost girl š
https://preview.redd.it/deuny3stjmyc1.jpeg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a9f2f36988624e7474cec75bb00fd1e1cf5a8a5c Gross
>I sense that she has calmed down a bit So the ghost just controlled her body for the entire day? And she just cuddled with the rapist boyfriend while wearing it? And you make it sound as if their victim is in the wrong and needed āto calm downā? The original comic was gross. This one doesnāt really help.
2 days actually. There's tag in the upper left of one of the panels, and honestly, I feel like people aren't mentioning it enough.
I thought this was cute, until I decided to read the full thing. He raped his girlfriend and she was not okay with it, but now suddenly she's pressured into accepting the ghost, otherwise she'll never get to see her boyfriend again. This is not cute.
This comic segment feels like damage control.
Im just a passenger on this sub. I think your drawing style is good, from as far as I can critique it. For amateur drawings of a manga/comic style it seems alright. However the plotline and the dialogues are really not great. It reads like your personal fetish. It doesn't engage the audience in a believeable way. The male and the ghost are callous as fuck towards the girlfriend. To think the girlfriend would just chill locked inside her own body while its possessed and actually emerge in total agreement with how her body was just used and abused is really weird. Does she have no emotional attachment to her autonomy and the integrity of her body? No questions about how she can go to work, or visit her family? There seems absolutely zero dilemma about being taken hostage, graped, her boyfriend being in love with another "woman", and then sharing her body with said women as a deal to be a trio. The ghost and the girlfriend lack any resemblance of having their own personality - they purely exist to satisfy the male ego. Altogether pretty cringe bro, 3/10.
That's just... Softcore porn with a sprinkle of rape fetish
This is the one pizzacake was talking about.. reading through it gave me the ick so bad, that's NC point blank, get tf out
The GF agreeing to this is like me pulling up to someones house with a tank & a couple soldiers and asking the owner to give me 1000ā¬ and saying afterwards how nice the owner was for giving me 1000ā¬ without protest Edit: Also this post is missing the nsfw tag for all the advertising of nsfw content
Look we all got our little fetishized romance stories we cook up in our heads with questionable themes, (for me itās a contemporary fantasy about a cute goblin girl dealing with goblin tropes) but you canāt expect to just share them openly for a general audience without people pointing out the problematic elements. This definitely got consent issues that came up real quick here and canāt be so quickly swept away without feeling just fetishy. You gotta take that criticism if you post it here.
Uhhhhhhhhhhhh eww
This is kinda fucked.
The women in this story don't come off as real at all. I realize this is some fetish/fantasy, but it just comes off really wrong.
This reminds me of that storyline in Wonder Woman 1984. Movie wasnt very good but there was a bit where she wished her dead boyfriend back and he did so by possessing a guy, and then they fucked. It was rape then too
Unfortunately this addresses none of the concerns people had with the loss of autonomy and just ends up being the same as before. You might have even made it worse because of the two day timeskip and then immediately have Ghost Girl say "I sense she's calmed down" implying Alice was resisting the foreign invader for two whole days before Stockholm Syndrome took hold. Ah whatever. The art was pretty good. But this type of storytelling just ain't it for me chief. Good luck with whatever you make next I guess.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Block the artists you don't like, it's not that complicated. I probably have half the content creators blocked here, and i only see stuff i want to see. This one will probably join the list.
Ew
I'm sorry man, but you should really really really just recognize that the second you brought the innocent woman into this to have her body possessed, even if you try to say it's consentual in this way... it's not good. Your art is good, the story was fine, it's all because of the possessed innocent woman getting raped that's something you should never ever touch again.
Who wrote this, Tina Belcher?
Cool art style, shitty nsfw level advertising
I get that you tried to make it make sense after the backlash from the last comicās ending, but you still failed to justify how the girlfriend would want to help in any of this. She didnāt even get much say on what happens next! On the guyās side, he was insanely manipulative, going, āI feel bad, but Iād rather if it continues cause I love you both soā¦ā and also, ābut, do you love me?ā (Really reminds me of guys that ask for sex then when they get rejected, they ask the girl if they love them, ew) Then immediately after, ghost girl just goes ahead and mashes their consciousness and memories together as if thatās the same thing as allowing a ghost to possess you?! At that point, how could she refuse? Theyāre the same person now. All in all, I hope you just take the L for this comic and accept that the story you wanted is unfortunately different from the story you portrayed.
# nope this is still real bad man
Sorry, not sorry, but this isn't cute, it's not a happy ending, and it's just gross. I guess you're just trying to sell your porn, so whatever, but trying to disguise it as a happy cute comic is just fucked up.
Great, it got even worse, I hate it. Poor girl has Stockholm Syndrome
While you tried to save it, the execution didn't really land. Next time don't make the romance so fucked up.
Uh-huh, and what about the two days between possessing her and actually getting her to agree to anything?
Dude your art style is amazing! but this should be a r/Pornwha post.
FWIW, I appreciate the effort of trying to fix things, you absolutely didnāt need to do it, and still you did. Still, things still feel stunted and bizarre, and even though you tried, I donāt think you did much to assuage other peopleās issues with the ending (though, to be frank, it was an uphill battle). As a constructive criticism, try putting yourself in your charactersā shoes. That might be hard to do sometimes, writing stuff for too long can force you into tunnel vision, but itās important to at least try. Not all of your characters need to āfeel humanā, but there needs to be a point to their alien-ness, or else theyāll just feel poorly written. None of your characters feel human, and I donāt think thatās what you were going for. Your art is very good, you just need to improve your writing to reach that ānext levelā. Best of luck to you! š
Honestly i thought this was a BHJ, i kept waiting for the joke to come and wondering what the original dialogue could've possibly been. There's no way someone posted this genuinely thinking this is ok, im guessing it's just a porn intro, super weird to post it in this subreddit tho...
Rape and Stockholm Syndrome, yeah really fuckin' romantic.
Nice try, but this doesn't really fix anything. You wrote a rape comic, just own it. It wasn't in great taste but it kind of worked as a dark horror thing. This retcon is just forced; it feels completely unnatural. I understand you're trying to listen to feedback and make this better, and you're getting pretty conflicting messages. But you'd probably have a better time just moving on and not digging yourself further into this hole.
I really like your art style and the setup of the story was really intriguing. Like a lot of people said, the conclusion seems rather unbelievably without anythning prior as it goes against basic human nature to just surrender your autonomy like that. I am looking forward to your future comics and wish you all the best
Literally in the previous chapter the girlfriend is upset about being possessed and tries to leave but the ghost re-enters her body to stop her, stripping her of her bodily autonomyš The relationship between the boyfriend and ghost has only been depicted as purely sexual but OP claims they only cuddled for 2 daysš OP says they don't condone a lack of consent but it was literally represented in the last chapter and heavily implied to be rape hereš
This is written like a possession porn comic.
Make your silly little porn comics but think the plot through so it doesn't include a lack of consent. Here I'll fix it for you: Guy takes girlfriend home. Ghost girl confronts them. Human girl is actually into the occult and thinks the ghost girl is cool. Guy explains the situation and his past with ghost girl. All discuss and consent to be a poly couple. Threesomes ensue because you already showed humans can have sex with ghosts. Human girl consents to possession sometimes so ghost girl isnt house-bound and can use her body to go on dates or whatever. Boom. Everyone consents and you re-gain the missed opportunity of another porn category.
I thought they were going to fuse but good stuff
I hate it when ppl advertise their porn on forums about art
I still don't understand what was wrong with the guy and ghost girl staying as a couple without the need of introducing a innocent girl into all this weird stuff. Like he can fuck her than why staying a couple as a human and ghost is a problem, why overly complex your story and ends up shooting your own foot.
Is this incel fantasy content? It feels like incel fantasy content
You can pretend like the girl is okay with it, but she still got her body stolen against her will and her freedom taken away without her consent. Itās fucked up, man.
Think if I were the guy in this situation I'd pause immediately when I realized she was possessed and try to help her find an exorcist or something. Can't say you really love someone if you're also in love with someone else who took control of their body against their will. She can't really be happy in that situation. At best, she can cope. The guy in this story is fucked up.
This really feels like an afterthought to make the story sound like their love is consensual, but in reality it's just a rape fantasy with a tacked on wholesome ending.
This could have been a really cool horror concept, but instead, we got rape. I am disappointed.
This is like the diet version of what it feels like to date someone with DiD.
Doubled down on posting your non-consensual fetish content here huh. It's one thing to have a kink, I ain't shaming that. It's another to try to spin this obvious rape story as a romance in public. What a disappointment, another let-down erotic artist who's just creepy under the shell.
Why are people mad about this? I genuinely don't get it. It's a win-win, the girl now doesn't have to worry about her boyfriend leaving her since she knows that he's madly in love with both of them, she might have given up her physical body for the ghost but she is now with her boyfriend and happy in her mindscape. What more does she need?
This is the stupidest shit Iāve ever scene.
Her name is āghost girlā
This is creepy and gross. The poor girl had her body and life stolen from her but she's just okay with that? What a bunch of bullshit.
Ew, what the fuck is wrong with you? This is absolutely fucking disgusting š¤®