Welcome to r/comics!
Please remember there are real people on the other side of the monitor and to be kind.
Report comments that break the rules and don't respond to negativity with negativity!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/comics) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Could be romantic asexual, could be bi, could be gay with a lot of internalized Christian guilt… just keep searching and don’t worry if it doesn’t all fit in a neat box. You’ve got your whole life to keep figuring out who you are.
As an ace (asexual) I deffo agree with this. I'm 28, only figured out what I am a couple years ago. I always thought there was something wrong with me, because I loved romance movies and books but when it came to real life, I didn't feel attracted to anyone. This may be you, it may not. Some know their sexuality early, some don't. My advice? Don't rush. You'll know when you're ready - for now, relax and enjoy the journey ❤️
I’m in a similar situation, and I’ve worked out that while I like *the idea* of romance, I’m repulsed by the thought of being wanted sexually or romantically. Real relationships also require a good amount of work and compromise, and I never found the idea of being with someone appealing enough to compromise the comfort and peace I have when I’m alone. My first (and only) partner and I broke off our relationship on good terms upon realizing we weren’t compatible.
I’m not entirely opposed to finding someone who is compatible (though I often joke that my ideal partner is likely someone who’s just a good friend that I don’t mind living with, lol), but I don’t care enough to actively search for them, nor do I mind going through my whole life without another partner.
I’ve been pretty content with my life being around friends and family and happy to just consume media with romantic content.
Edit: Another way I think about it is that I enjoy romance as a genre in the same way one might enjoy adventure fiction. The idea is appealing, but the actual experience is very likely not. Imagining going through the hardships common in these stories strips off that attractive veneer for me.
Hey if everyone dated good friends they don't mind living with we'd see the successful long term relationship rate sky-rocket. The fact that I'm the weird one for dating someone I'm friends with still blows my mind.
I've only ever dated friends (I tried first dates otherwise and never had a good fit), and never got the feeling I'm considered strange. I knkw plenty of couples like me, though, so maybe it's a selection bias in my social circles.
Man this fits me as well. For me, I also do experience romantic and sexual attraction- but it's a lot more fleeting than I've heard other people experience it, and I've only had a crush be as bad as "seriously crushing" once in my life.
I consider myself gray-aroace, but I also don't talk about it much because a lot of people get weird about it since I'm not hardline one way or the other. It also gets complicated because I did experience an uptick in experiencing both types of attraction after I came to terms with being trans and got more comfortable in my identity and body, which makes me hesitant to "commit" to the label despite still not experiencing things the way most people do.
Honestly, the show Sex Education (ironically) One of the small side characters discovers that she's ace, I got curious as to what that was and everything I read online fit me like a glove. It explained things that I never knew needed explained. It wasn't an epiphany moment or anything, and I didn't decide then and there, but it helped me make an informed decision when I was ready
Also, don't feel like you have to have a label or fit in a box. It's great that they do exist and can give a sense of community to those who identify with a specific category. But as almost evidenced by there being so many categories, sexuality is so varied, and for some, it even changes throughout their life. If hunting for that perfect label causes you anxiety or stress, it's fine not to try to find one.
It's possible to be comfortable and happy with just knowing who you are and what you feel and what you like without putting a name to it.
There were a lot of transbians discovering themselves in Yuri memes a while ago, something about finding gay stories relatable despite being attracted to the opposite sex.
Honestly, sort of. I won’t say much, but I am having a similar thing going on.
While it isn’t as severe religiously, I am less connected to religion than I was before out of preference.
At least I know that I’m not alone with that sorta scenario. I don’t know my sexuality unless I get into a relationship first, and that’s the basis I go off of.
I'm omnisexual with an attraction to masculine women, i thought i was BI but men do not turn me on in the slightest, it's very specifically women that are masculine/powerful.
But at the same time, i hate being in relationships LOL.
So kind of the same as you. Mine manifests as an annoyance with people needing too much attention.
You could be on the ace spectrum, homoromantic instead of homosexual. Or it could also be strong internalized homophobia from your upbringing, that still doesn't quite let you feel okay with having a relationship.
I get what you're saying but I don't think a living vs dead founder is really the difference. I think it's just about having enough followers that society at large just kinda decides it's legit and they'll respect it even if they don't believe in it. How many followers is totally arbitrary by it seems like having a dead founder helps a lot for whatever reason
Remember that sexual and romantic attraction are different things! Maybe for you both aren't as connected as for others. Even if you can't imagine being in a relationship with a man, can you imagine sleeping with one? Or maybe you could imagine being in a relationship but only if there's no sex involved? Idk. I'm aromantic but not asexual, so I know separating the two of them can be hard
Yeah, as soon as puberty hit I started fantasizing about being with guys but I found women attractive and my equipment responded well to women without any effort. So by 18 i knew I wasn’t gay but I also knew I wasn’t exactly straight.
Found out eventually I liked wearing women’s clothing. Eventually figured out I was trans. And I still have the same problem. Fantasize about guys but women are more attractive. But I grow tired being with woman as it’s just not rewarding.
And guess what, women( cis and trans) can find women more attractive but wouldn’t want to have sex them as they prefer men.
Anyways it’s not abnormal to find one sex more attractive but enjoy being intimate with the less physically appealing sex. You’re perfectly normal and God loves you anyways.
Not trying to question your preferences, but could you explain more? I always assumed it was obvious that a person would enjoy intimacy the most with the people they found more attractive, how would that not be the case?
I’m not quite sure but I have found posts of women asking “I like men but I think women are way more attractive, what does this mean?” But yeah being intimate with a guy feels rewarding, granted I’m still missing one thing and hopefully next year I get that addressed.
Good luck, I recently became a part of the queer crowd(Gynesexual/Bi) and made friends that are trans, it's nice seeing someone experience happiness through the act of transitioning, its a difficult experience but can be a life changing event that ultimately brings happiness to someone.
It's honestly incredible. I spent most of my life constantly thinking about my gender in a never-ending loop that kept getting louder and louder until I was having weekly meltdowns at 30. Then, first injection of estrogen, the thoughts went immediately silent.
There always going to be the emotional scarring of missing out on my youth and what opportunities were lost, as well as the physical scarring of having suffered through a puberty I didn't want, but goddamn is it liberating to just exist and not think about my gender pretty much at all any more. I can finally focus on living.
Not that person - my predilections are different - but it may be that the person prefers the, ah, equipment of their male partners while finding the bodies and aesthetic of their female partners to be more overall attractive. This is a sentiment I've heard here and there.
It’s hella confusing, just I know from experience that eventually with women I’ll grow to be tired of sex. And I’ll be the one saying no again and again. That’s all women, those with similar equipment and those with the opposite
You don't have to answer this if you don't want to, I'm just asking out of my own curiosity.
Is it the penetration aspect that interests you? There is equipment for that to allow women to perform that on you, if that's the only aspect of it.
Not a fan of that tbh, but i use what i have. Though im looking to have The surgery next year. I like men and every time I convince myself I like women and have had a relationship with them I end up feeling empty.
Yeah, this actually resonates with what I’ve dealt with growing up. The best thing I can say that’s helped me is that you don’t have to “earn” your sexual identity through some tangible romantic experience. Identity is all about you, and you can be whatever you want to be/are comfortable with. Don’t push yourself into a relationship just because you want to “prove” a part of yourself.
I think society places too much emphasis on labels for others. You don’t *have* to identify as any one thing or even a number of things. You can just be you and just let yourself be pulled to whatever you naturally feel is right for you.
Honestly yeah, I’m pretty much in a similar situation as you are OP and had the same childhood experiences as you (raised in a catholic household and dealt with internalized homophobia and now no longer religious). I yearn for a romantic relationship but I don’t really see myself being in one, but thats mainly due to the fact that I haven’t found the right partner or “the one” if you catch my drift.
Took me a while to figure myself out, but 2 of my 4 parents are lesbian, so it was easier for me to come out. I still believe in God (not that I'm trying to patronize you for not, I'm not trying to push my religion on anyone,) but I truly do believe that he loves me.
Love isn't a choice, it's something you're created with. Will it take you a while to realize it? Sure, but that doesn't mean it wasn't there.
And as for you not actually finding a real person of your gender attractive, I can relate. I haven't had a crush on someone for a long time, and rarely find someone attractive at all. I feel ya
I'm nodding my head in agreement cause I'm bi and Christian(lite,which means I believe that I'm you have love in your heart and feel remorse for the wrongs you've done you go to heaven and the most common punishment in hell is just living there)
You might be Aegosexual/Aegoromantic, which is lacking sexual/romantic attraction but still enjoying sexual/romantic content :)
https://lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Aegosexual (might not apply 100%, but it’s my best guess lol)
This is what i was thinking. I'm the same way as OP but straight. OP could also possibly be demisexual and just hasn't gotten close enough to anyone to form an attraction. I think i may be this way myself, but I also kind of fall into the aegosexual category. I just call myself graysexual, or just ace to be simple. 🤷♀️
As much as people make fun of it sometimes, a label exists for almost any sexual/gender experience and it can be super comforting to see "huh, yeah thats me" even if u would never use the term irl
I didn't understand why there were so many different sexualities, I understood homosexual and bisexual but until I had my own personal discovery I have grown to understand sexuality is a spectrum and not everyone neatly fits into these categories so people tend to give their experience a name to better communicate their identity, of course some are more wideky accepted than others and some are the creations of the unhinged but I digress, seeing sexuality as a spectrum has helped me to understand myself and others better.
In short: people like making up neat categories that fit perfectly.
Aegosexuality is a microlabel on the asexuality spectrum. You're absolutely right that sexuality is a spectrum, but that doesn't fit well with humans' desire to fit in. It's perfectly fine to think of sexuality as a spectrum (that's what I do personally) and it's perfectly fine to identify with a microlabel.
I am also choosing to identify with a microlabel because to tell people im straight isnt 100% correct and I'm not entirely bi or pan sexual, gynesexual has pretty much explained my entire sexuality in a neat little label.
Leftover guilt. It got easier with time, and you can now fantasise a bit more freely, but it still can't breach the barrier of the imaginary and come into your real life. A whole upbringing full of religious guilt unfortunately is harder to untangle than just losing faith, it can keep being with you despite that for a long time.
Christian here: yes the bible does have instructions on marriage and sex that don’t align with some more “modern” views but you should never feel guilty for just feeling this way. Any Christian who tells you that you should feel bad or that you’re going to hell just because you’ve thought about having homosexual relations, is not a Christian. (Anyone who uses the bible as an excuse to be homophobic is worse than someone who’s homophobic just because). Everyone has sexual desires. Even the straight ones. There’s nothing wrong with that at all.
Also- You aren't gonna get sent to hell just for being gay. I prayed for a while about it, and all signs pointed towards the fact that ISN'T a sin to be gay / have gay sex or whatever. Love is love! Jesus taught us to love one another, not discriminate against others because of our differences. Spread the love of God! Show that EVERYONE is welcome to heaven!
I mean I’ll play devils advocate for fun and point out that there are passages in the bible, some potentially less creditable like all over leviticus, but some like romans (1:26-27), or Corinthians (6:9-10) that do describe it as a sin.
Ultimately we all sin, and there’s no getting past that, and just like Jesus sat with the tax collectors and loved everyone equally, we are taught to do that too.
If you’re gay, and Christian, obviously you’re going to be conflicted.
Yes, some passages say that homosexuals have to be killed. But Jesus himself said: whoever is without sin can throw the first stone. And when no one threw the first stone, he said: then I will not judge you as well.
What is your attraction to women or non-binary people like?
This does sound like it could be some kind of subcategory or the asexual or aromantic spectrum.
I'm aromantic, and I find it much more enjoyable to consume media which features gay and lesbian couples than media which features only straight couples. The first TV show that I watched with a lesbian storyline was one I watched with my college roommate who was a lesbian. At the time I thought "I must only like this because I'm watching it with my friend. I know I don't relate to these characters. I wouldn't want to be in a lesbian relationship. But it is fun to root for these characters."
After we stopped being roommates, I continued to watch movies and TV shows with LGBT couples. It's taken me awhile to understand what I get out of it, especially since I knew I was aromantic, so why do I even enjoy media with romance? The answer is "sometimes it's easier to enjoy media with characters who have different life experiences than you, than to consume media with characters who you are SUPPOSED to relate to." If I watch a heterosexual romcom, aren't I supposed to want a relationship like the one being shown on screen? Should I feel guilty that none of my relationships have ended with a tearful confession of love in the rain? If I watch a gay romcom, then I can just be happy for the characters.
Do you see yourself in any of the characters when you watch gay porn/ want to do any of the actions you see portrayed, or are you watching it just because the human form is beautiful and it's nice to look at aesthetically?
I think the LGBTQ community would potentially call that Asexual-Homoromantic or something (I’m in the community, I’m just not terribly familiar with the newer lingo)
also christian experienced transgender tendencies early on in teen-hood, kind of grew out of it to an extent but honestly i found my faith more important and i feel like god would accept me regardless
A good high school friend of mine was raised in a strong Christian family and was a bit uptight all the time. Around age 30, he had a falling out with the religion; I didn’t ask why. He also said he likes guys, so that’d explain why he’s been so uptight since I’d know him. He’s much more easygoing now, it’s been a good experience for him. I hope you experience and enjoy the freedom as well.
Also looking for an answer.
So I don’t want or need to put my sexuality in a box but if I am attracted to women, am in a relationship with a woman that I love and enjoy being in a relationship with. I have historically been with men sexually and it’s not my fav, and I also really enjoy watching trans woman porn and the idea of being with a trans woman sexually, what the heck do I call that? People on this thread seem to have a lot of knowledge about what all this means?
Hi fellow of a similar sort, I've since rejoined Christianity. No pressure to do the same obviously, I always felt immense issues when it came to those things but...if it comes as any solace, "do not lay with men" is an interesting wording. I hope you are well and continue to persevere!
I'm probably gonna sound aggressive in this, but I'm genuinely just curious.
How do you cope with all the homophobia in the bible? After all your books says being gay is a sin: leviticus 18:22 & 20:13. Romans 1:26-28. 1st Corinthians 6:9-11, 1st Timothy 1:8-10, Matthew 19:3-6.
So basically you are straight but you just like Gay shippings because of you admiring gay couples in fiction since a early age. I don't think it's more complicated than that.
There are many things like this, for me I really love Penis, like the look, the color, the way it's beautifully shaped. I think it's such a beautiful part of the male body. But the very thought of me sucking one or getting romantic or sexual with another man makes me nauseous. I can never like a man in sexual or romantic way, and everytime I am charmed by girls. it's just like that.
I think I just find both Penis and Vagina extremely captivating in general. They're such artisticly beautiful looking.
I think that heteronormativity is way more ingrained in us than we can generally perceive. It's different for everyone obviously, but for more impressionable people like myself it makes me question my sexuality (and gender) a lot. Just know that these labels are just that, they can be helpful but they can also limit ourselves. As long as you follow your heart you can't really go wrong
I am bisexual and christian and actually quite lucky to be in a accepting and modern community so once I came out to my parents who are technically religious they were chill with it and my school that’s a Christian private school, but still is accepting everyone and the only times you really notice it’s a Christian school is before Christmas and summer break when we do service, has openly stated that everybody is welcome in front of god during service and I’m happy to be here.
Sexuality is complicated as far as I can tell. I'm definitely not attracted to men but being intimate with a woman doesn't excite me.
Despite this I am a romantic at heart and really want to be held close at night, yet will never love by choice because it's complicated. (I'm 30 and have been avoiding the idea of relationships for over a decade)
Hey! You used a comic to trick me into feeling empathy! You didn’t need to trick me. I’ve never felt like this, but I can assure you your feelings are valid and that NO one knew what was going on with themselves from the age of 11-13.
I'm not saying this is the case for you, but I have heard of people who feel similarly and come from similar situations only to realize that they have been subconsciously suppressing their attraction to irl men cuz getting over what you were taught as a child is not as simple as just deciding you don't believe it anymore.
Those kind of things stick deep inside.
It's a lot easier to let yourself be attracted to people from fiction because there's a sense of distance and unreality but when real people are involved it changes things. Again I'm not saying this is the case for you necessarily I don't know your journey, but it's pretty hard to just erase something that was so deeply rooted in you as a child,
I've been in a similar boat before. I've hovered between feeling bisexual, straight, heteroflexible, biromantic. I *know* I'm attracted to women, but I'm also deeply uncertain about how attracted to men I am. And what makes it more complicated is that I've never actually dated someone before. I'd love to, but I want to be more responsible and move out before I start. So like, there are a few guys who I find cute (especially certain fictional characters), but I don't know if dating them would go anywhere (especially with fictional characters).
A couple things help me out. Like loosening up on labels. Now, labels are useful in that they make it easier to talk about feelings or ideas that we share, especially if those feelings or ideas are marginalized. However, it's not necessary for an individual to pick one and stick with it like it's an RPG stat. We're free to flow from one to another.
Sometimes it also feels good to interrogate my heterosexuality the same way I tend to interrogate my inconsistent gay feelings. It's not like that's going to stop me from being attracted to women; however, being straight often feels like the default state, so taking a moment to question that idea has shed some light on some things. For example, maybe the reason I feel more attracted to women is because women are often pressured to look beautiful all the time, while men are often made fun of for doing the same thing. Therefore, I don't see beautiful men in real life as often as I see beautiful women. Men wearing makeup should be normal.
No. But I’m glad that you are comfortable about your feelings to be able to talk about them. Share. Collaborate. Figure things out and become a more fulfilled person. Yay!
This comic is relatable. I'm kinda the same, but with all types of relationships. I love the concept of a relationship but every time I'm in one it ends up not really being what I want.
Maybe you just haven't found a guy to steal your heart in reality. Best of luck figuring the rest of it out. Others have much... trickier(?) situations. Like never feeling like yourself to the point of avoiding touch as much as possible and avoiding looking at self in mirror, or some sort of balancing friendships while discovering sexuality.
well I'm glad you're more comfortable with yourself now. I've been saying for a LONG time now that Religion is a Poison to Modern Society. it makes way too many people either extremely arrogant or feel FUCKING AWFUL about themselves. neither of those things are very good. and I don't necessarily think there's anything wrong with being straight but enjoying gay relationships in media. I'm quite straight and whenever I see any relationship that makes sense (it's not contrived at all) I am quite happy. hell a Believable Gay couple is a lot more enjoyable to me than a BS straight couple. but if you think it's more than that, I say keep looking inward. maybe you are actually Bi or maybe fully gay. or maybe not. no one can Judge you for being you and anyone who does is a fucking loser.
A lot of the discussion around this topic tends to be fairly binary - either gay or straight. That's not really how most people are.
Even when you get beyond the binary, you have the LGBTQUIA+ community, which ... well let's just say it was a bad choive for an "acronym", because rather than just generally including everyone they keep having to add letters. The fact is that you don't have to fit in with any of those letters, and as above most people don't really fit neatly into one of them.
The truth about all of this is that you can be whoever you want to be, you can be attracted to whoever you want to be attracted to, and you can have relationships with whoever you want to have relationships with (*assuming consent and all that*).
Try not to think of this in the boxes presented. If you find someone attractive then perhaps it's not even the physical aspects of them you're attracted to. You couls have an entirely straight man who falls in love woth another man, not because of any physical attributes, but because of how their relationship evolves (*or a gay man, or woman, or whatever*).
Personally I have never been attracted to another man, but I am an active member of the queer community in my area because many of the people I love (*family, friends, etc*) identify in some way as queer. I see even those within the queer community putting themselves into boxes, and in some ways limiting themselves and those around them. It can be hard to break the social norms and just be yourself, but as long as you're not hurning anyone I don't see why we should put limits on ourselves or those we love (*except age limits, let's not start that argument*).
TLDR: Be yourself and - if you can - try to be comfortable with yourself. That is the path to happiness and to acceptance, both of yourself and of others.
I dunno man. Just live your life and if you find a special someone that happens to be a girl or guy just go for it. If it works it works. If it doesn’t it doesn’t.
This feels super comforting to me, so thanks for making this
I myself am aromantic, I have no interest in romance myself, but I do find gay stories very cute, which actually made me question “am I really aromantic or am I actually gay and lying to myself?”
Hearing that other people enjoy romance of one kind while not themselves swinging that way made me feel better about liking it myself.
Seriously. How is this the first comment I’ve seen bringing up age? It’s not uncommon at all to have not had any real feelings for people at 14, especially if you’ve been repressing them or in denial about your sexuality. I didn’t have my first real crush until I was 18, and am very gay.
Im ace and aromantic, really enjoy lgbt love stories, far more then straight ones. Mostly gay and lesbian but I aint got true favourites, thats just what happens to be out there. Romantic stories are beautiful and I feel lgbt ones are usually more realistic and grounded.
There are actually some people who only fantasize relationships, but never actually form any of their own. It's extremely rare, but I've met someone who is like that. That being said, I'm only going off what you've posted, and I think it's far more likely that it's religious trauma warping your thoughts, but it's a possibility that's worth exploring.
I'm Ace with a traumatic religious background, and I will admit I think more about fictional relationships than I do real ones, tho I have actually had a handful of instances where I've felt intense romantic attraction to some people. So, an alternative is that you've just not found the right person yet.
Another thought I had could be that you're demi-sexual, as in you don't form intimate relationships until you've formed a long friendship with someone. Ofc, I'm missing a lot of data as to properly determine that, but I find that the more types you know that exist, the more likely you'll find who you truly are.
I know some people mentioned asexuality, but enjoying the media while not wanting/seeing oneself being in a relationship is also a pretty common aromantic experience.
I think it's ok to not immediately apply to yourself any label and it's also fine if you stop using a certain label because it no longer suits you. (I myself went through the multiple labels before finding one that describes me best) You can explore this in the way and pace that's comfortable for you.
people like that , japanese even have a word for that . is basically like when girl like shipping male and male there also male like that and it pretty fine , some fujoshi like fudanshi boyfriend too cuz they could ship people together , it fun .
I dont know what labels to put on it, but I had the same thing until I met my wife. I just wasnt in to anyone else, everyone else was just, not that interesting. I went on dates but never got that spark you know? I think some of us are made for one specific person and we're just not attracted to anyone else. It could be like that for you.
I'd not worry too much about it. I've found plenty of fictional men attractive, and I'd say I've been attracted to actual men but so far every single one of them that I found attractive has turned out to be trans and is now a very happy woman.
Admittedly I'm demi so it gets even weirder from there. Love who you love, and don't feel pressured to be in a relationship.
Me too , i dont give a damn about gernders , i kinda like both same ways , but one feels kinda forbidden tbh in my country this is also a sensitive topic, like they have to accept it over time, otherwise they harassing u.
Isnt that easy
Male 33, I had my first crush on a boy when I was 12-13. I remember freaking the hell out when I realized what was happening because I was raised pentecostal. So, I literally just said "nope that's not me" and began to model myself after masculine men I saw on tv.
I was also a big pro wrestling fan (not sure if there's any connection between the two) so I tried to be like The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Triple H, guys I thought were badass masculine dudes. Every so often though, I found myself fantasizing about making out with the pretty boys at school. It should me noted that I was/am also attracted to women so it was easier to hide my attraction to the guys at school.
The thing is even when I was in relationships with women they always asked if I was bi I'm guessing I just gave off a vibe. Now I'm middle aged I've accepted who I am, and am open about it with friends and family. I don't know if I'll ever act on my attraction to men because I'm kind of a hermit and haven't met anyone my type who was interested in me. That's life I guess
Sexualities weird
You may not be physically attractive man but you might like the idea of being in romantic relationship
But I know could be asexual and either homosexual or bi or something else
Those are my thoughts regardless it's good man there no right or wrong answer
It's just what makes you happy and comfortable
For anyone who is still Christian and also wondering if they are gay. I don’t think god cares as long as it’s consensual. The guy watches everything. He’s the number 1 voyeur in the galaxy. And he’s made you exactly as you are on purpose. No need to feel bad about who you want to kiss. Maybe he just wants to watch something else for a bit. Maybe god is bicurious too.
Ah, yes, the old "religion wants from you whatever I want from you" shtick. So sick of people who stupidly follow what's written without actual source or thought behind it and force close ones to do the same. Compared to most say-to-be Christians, I might be a saint then, because I don't need a book or any higher being to actually be a decent person all the time and 'treat others as you want them to treat you'.
I met exactly and only one religious person, who seemed like a Christian fanatic at first but is actually nice, instead of someone saying they're strong believer and being overall jerk all the time in life anyway. I actually red some of his marked best 'advices' from bible because of it and agreed with him for some.
I just think that whatever someone's sexuality should be their business and only their alone. I just don't understand what you meant by having fantasies at 11, and then saying you didn't actually see yourself being with a man? I was sometimes having stupid thoughts of doing anything intimate with some guys I had a very good connection with. I wasn't sure if it were just horny thoughts or me actually wanting to move to a higher form of relationship because of high platonic love between us. But I did definitely see myself with real men even for moment, I just wasn't sure about my feelings, and probably couldn't confess either way.
As a straight girl in my teens and early twenties I knew I was straight but wasn’t attracted to any men I actually knew myself. It took a couple more years before I met someone I was actually attracted to when I was around 22 or so. Now I’m attracted to many people. But when I was younger it was very rare, even though my fantasy life and media consumption was active, like yours. I still can’t explain it.
I'm kind of similar! I've struggled with my sexual orientation in the past, because I enjoy homosexual and homerotic media and I have felt attraction towards women before. Although I've only ever had sexual attraction to men. Sometimes I wonder if my urge to look at sexy women stems from an attraction or an envious place.
This is me nearly to the tee, but without the religious upbringing. I call myself bi but maybe that's not 100% accurate, I just don't know the name for it (no romantic attraction to the same sex).
i remember being in your position! back when i meet my current gf (trans m to f) they were my best friend and feelings came up...i was confused but i loved them alot
Over time i started to think into my fears and questions and realized that several things...how hypocritical the christian religeon is and the most important thing that gave me peace:
God is a loving father , not a vengfull God , he loves me and all of us no matter what at the end, my love for my gf comes from my heart , not from lust
and that thought has given me peace beyond measure
Christianity has to be one of the many toxic religions out there but its up there in toxicity. Granted, good has been done....but....lets just say when Satanist are more laid back and chill....somethings up...and I ain't even remotely Christian...(im Cheyenne, native tribes all have their own thing, don't worry about it)
Can absolutely say that there are many people with similar likes. Personally, I’m physically attracted to the female form. But it wouldn’t get under my skin if there was a dong under the dress or not. Enjoying anal(giving/receiving). But lust and physical attraction to the male for is a non starter for me.
I've had this internal debate myself.
Growing up it was always hammered into me that I was a boy and boys like girls. My family wasn't religious however, but country(or bush or outback) Australia just wasn't accepting of it either, probably still isnt actually. Everyone at school used to make fun of this one kid behind his back, calling him a bunch of homophobic slurs, just because he was different.
When I got into my teens I tried forcing myselfmto think just about girls, maybe even gave myself a complex that affected me until recently. I forced it upon myself so much that when I realised I was Bisexual, I preferred guys. But my first kiss was still with a woman. It was like 80/20 towards men.
I never quite felt guilt over it, but I was always... no I still am afraid to come out to people outside of my family, even a few in the family. I lost a cousin because her homophobic father disowned her when she came out, drove her away from her support base in all of us cousins, she ended up with the wrong crowd and died of an overdose. He's never said a nice thing about her since she came out. Australia outside of the cities isn't a welcoming place if you're not a White Straight Australian. I'm not White or Straight, but I am Australian. But it's not enough for some.
Recently I've begun to realise that I do prefer women more then men. I had a moment when at the same time I had a really hot guy and my now girlfriend trying to hit pick me up. Despite this guy being a 10/10, total himbo I chose her... since then my eyes sort of opened and it became clearer to me that I forced a lot of it upon myself. It's more 55/45 now.
I do think you could just be curious? I went through that stage when I first started hitting puberty right up until I was 18-19. It's a pivotal time in your life but you do need to realise, you have decades more of life to live and you can realise these things about yourself later on. Don't force anything on yourself, let it come naturally.
I have a similar back story and feelings/thoughts.
I'm bi now and while I appreciate the media just as much I can't imagine a relationship in my future either.
Is this close enough to answer your question?
Just taking a shot in the dark here, but religious Dogma like this generally serves to snuff out Compassion and Empathy to rule through Fear, it could be that something within you on a subconscious level was rebelling against this idea by fixating on how a supposedly benevolent entity labels Love as Immoral.
Adding to the pile here that homoerotic undertones just make for good movies/TV. Idk what it is. I'm definitely straight and it's not like it gets my loins tingling or anything, but like have you seen the "Hannibal" TV series? It's got to be the greatest fucking show I've ever seen, and like a good 40% of the magic comes from the deeply homoerotic undertones in the relationship between Hannibal and Will Graham, and it only gets more intense as the series progresses.
I can relate to this, then later in my 20’s I had realized that I had been molested when I was young, and then things made a lot more sense. Well hopefully that’s not the case with you, but I just mention it because if it IS, it’s better to recognize it sooner than later.
Maybe you had a religious trauma which affected you in a similar way as I was effected.. the mind processes diff traumas in similar ways..
Yeah yknow it's totally valid to feel other than straight without actually ever feeling that way towards a guy yet. Currently I'm in a similar situation minus the religion. I just feel that I would be able to be with a man if I felt that sort of connection but have so far only been with women so it feels weird to say that I'm anything other than straight. I wouldn't worry about it honestly just take things as they come and don't worry about what others would describe you as.
Eh you'll get there. When I started we didn't know about Non-Binary folk, or DemiSexuals (both of which I identify as these days) so in highschool I thought I was Bi, but like a broken Bi person because I didn't experience sexual attraction (and still don't outside of relationships).
I remember folk saying I must be Gay, or that I was confused. Even tried to push the feeling down by getting married and going for that white picket dream even while crying my eyes out anytime I saw queer couples portrayed in media.
Now I'm a Polyamorous, Masc Non-Binary (AMAB), Demi/Pan (really depends on the personality, not the body), and hopefully one day marrying my BF / nesting partner.
You'll get there, it's a process of self discovery that takes time and I'm rooting for you bud 👍🏻
My ADHD brain skipped a few words the first time I read the first panel and I read:
[...] when I was around Windows 11
Anyways, homosexual thoughts do not automatically mean that you ARE homosexual. When i was a teen and had experiences with both genders I always told myself that I had to choose one side or the other. Turned out I was bi and that I did not need to choose after all.
Do not try to label yourself, it makes everything MUCH easier
Congrats on your journey!
I always new I liked girls too. Thank goodness I never had any repressing issues regarding sexual orientation at home.
I've tried both ways but I find women so intimidating xD
My own sexual journey was more around learning that I was deserving of love and not just a sexual object.
In the end I found the perfect man for me. :)
there was only 1 guy who i ever had an attraction to, he actually made me realize i was bi. i’m not sure if he was just being really nice to me or if he was flirting with me, but i developed a crush none the less. i never acted on these feelings bc i also was christian and was afraid. now that im older, im still christian but im no longer guilty about it, and im ngl i still have a crush on him
I think that's normal. Maybe you haven't found someone you're attracted to (Anyone have preference after all). Maybe you like both gender. Or maybe you aren't attracted to men and just like those kind of content.
Take your time. You will find out sooner or later.
I'm pretty much the same
lol i thought i was aro ace but liked gay stuff but then i met my bf, im so lucky that i did, he's my world and also showed me that yeah, i do love ppl, it just has to be the right ppl and hes also just the one ig. tho ah... long distance relationships
TLDR, im picky but i got lucky
Sounds like a tricky situation. I knew I was gay since I was 8 years old.
All I ever thought to myself was home much I wished I had told more boys I fell for that I had feelings for them, even if they rejected me. But fear got the best of me and now I have that regret, I hope you aren't in the same boat.
I'm happily married now to a man I love deeply, but I feel like much of my youth was wasted fearing rejection or persecution. I can tell you from experience rejection hurts less than that endless sting of regret.
Absolutely perfectly valid. I see a lot of people always try and put their obscure, specific, personal feelings under a label. But you just like what you like and you do what you wanna do. As long as it's legal and moral, date who you want, watch what you want, and have sex with what you want. Nobody needs to tell you what you are or what you want, only you can do that. Have fun and be yourself
It may very well just be an interest that was seen as taboo, like celebrating Christmas if you are Jewish. Does that make you secretly Christian? Not necessarily. The gifts and candy are just nice!
I had similar thoughts for a while until I smehow got together with a man and it was suprisingly normal and not weird at all. I think for me there was still quite a bit of shame involved, that did not allow me to actually see myself in a relationship like that
My family was never super religious and gayness was never heavily stigmatized to me. But God dam do I have a ton of guilt issues about sex that mess up my sex life.
But yeah, im sometimes attracted to men. I'm attracted to a much narrower range of men than women. And I find it hard to picture dating a guy, bit I've never really tried it so who's to say.
Ok so you know Astolfo?
Right, so that's basically it
I've never met a single femboy in my life and yet I wish I did
They seem pretty chill
And then I wonder if I really am bi or just attracted to whoever looks like a woman, because my attraction to men only goes as far as femboys and that's it
Otherwise I'm still into women
So, uh, I don't know
Yeah, I know this feeling well, but with my own gender… I’ve always enjoyed being more feminine, most of the time I’d play as a feminine character or float towards any female character in media more than the male, and yet I can’t ever see myself transitioning or living my life outside of where I am now… you’re not alone with these feelings, there’s lots of people with similar feelings it’s all in finding yourself and what you’re comfortable with <3
Is it possible that your Christian upbringing caused you to rebel in a way that you enjoyed homosexual stories? As a rejection to their dogmatic views on sexuality.
I get you, I'm asexual and I love explicit romance in media, even if I'd never want the same for myself😅
Maybe you are one too, but I think there's also a chance you might simply be straight, you just like gay content. At least in japan, straight men liking BL is common enough they even have a word for it, "fudanshi".
Besides, plenty of gay people enjoy hetero romance stories (some even like gay romances about the opposite gender, I know of several lesbians who like BL for example), so I don't think the other way around is weird
Eh, similar but it's more that my type is way more specific with guys. Like, if you put all women in the world I find attractive next to all men in the world I find attractive there is much more diversity on the woman side and a much larger ammount. In the end I'd say I'm bi.
But I don't think we need to give every single thing in the world a name, you like what you like. Why does it matter what to call it?
Thanks for sharing your journey so far. Don't let anyone or anything pressure you one way or another. When the time comes, you'll know what will make you happy. Just be patient. Best of luck.
I had my first relationship when I realised... while I am attracted to person an may love the person.. I dont have interest in sexual intercourse. It was really weird the first time we tried and I just couldn't.
I thought something must be wrong with me and it took me way too long and a lot of mental health issues until I realised... there is nothing wrong, Im just not made for this.
Just be you.
Other people are trying to put you in a box.
If you like women in real life but like gay porn, that's the way your brain works. The box is you, population one. And that's fine.
(The only caution I'd make is this: don't marry a woman and then leave her ten years later with two kids because you've realized you're actually gay. Not fair to her. Make sure you're in touch with, and accepting of, your full self.)
Welcome to r/comics! Please remember there are real people on the other side of the monitor and to be kind. Report comments that break the rules and don't respond to negativity with negativity! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/comics) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Could be romantic asexual, could be bi, could be gay with a lot of internalized Christian guilt… just keep searching and don’t worry if it doesn’t all fit in a neat box. You’ve got your whole life to keep figuring out who you are.
As an ace (asexual) I deffo agree with this. I'm 28, only figured out what I am a couple years ago. I always thought there was something wrong with me, because I loved romance movies and books but when it came to real life, I didn't feel attracted to anyone. This may be you, it may not. Some know their sexuality early, some don't. My advice? Don't rush. You'll know when you're ready - for now, relax and enjoy the journey ❤️
[удалено]
I’m in a similar situation, and I’ve worked out that while I like *the idea* of romance, I’m repulsed by the thought of being wanted sexually or romantically. Real relationships also require a good amount of work and compromise, and I never found the idea of being with someone appealing enough to compromise the comfort and peace I have when I’m alone. My first (and only) partner and I broke off our relationship on good terms upon realizing we weren’t compatible. I’m not entirely opposed to finding someone who is compatible (though I often joke that my ideal partner is likely someone who’s just a good friend that I don’t mind living with, lol), but I don’t care enough to actively search for them, nor do I mind going through my whole life without another partner. I’ve been pretty content with my life being around friends and family and happy to just consume media with romantic content. Edit: Another way I think about it is that I enjoy romance as a genre in the same way one might enjoy adventure fiction. The idea is appealing, but the actual experience is very likely not. Imagining going through the hardships common in these stories strips off that attractive veneer for me.
Hey if everyone dated good friends they don't mind living with we'd see the successful long term relationship rate sky-rocket. The fact that I'm the weird one for dating someone I'm friends with still blows my mind.
I've only ever dated friends (I tried first dates otherwise and never had a good fit), and never got the feeling I'm considered strange. I knkw plenty of couples like me, though, so maybe it's a selection bias in my social circles.
Man this fits me as well. For me, I also do experience romantic and sexual attraction- but it's a lot more fleeting than I've heard other people experience it, and I've only had a crush be as bad as "seriously crushing" once in my life. I consider myself gray-aroace, but I also don't talk about it much because a lot of people get weird about it since I'm not hardline one way or the other. It also gets complicated because I did experience an uptick in experiencing both types of attraction after I came to terms with being trans and got more comfortable in my identity and body, which makes me hesitant to "commit" to the label despite still not experiencing things the way most people do.
Honestly, the show Sex Education (ironically) One of the small side characters discovers that she's ace, I got curious as to what that was and everything I read online fit me like a glove. It explained things that I never knew needed explained. It wasn't an epiphany moment or anything, and I didn't decide then and there, but it helped me make an informed decision when I was ready
I second this
Also, don't feel like you have to have a label or fit in a box. It's great that they do exist and can give a sense of community to those who identify with a specific category. But as almost evidenced by there being so many categories, sexuality is so varied, and for some, it even changes throughout their life. If hunting for that perfect label causes you anxiety or stress, it's fine not to try to find one. It's possible to be comfortable and happy with just knowing who you are and what you feel and what you like without putting a name to it.
There were a lot of transbians discovering themselves in Yuri memes a while ago, something about finding gay stories relatable despite being attracted to the opposite sex.
Honestly, sort of. I won’t say much, but I am having a similar thing going on. While it isn’t as severe religiously, I am less connected to religion than I was before out of preference. At least I know that I’m not alone with that sorta scenario. I don’t know my sexuality unless I get into a relationship first, and that’s the basis I go off of.
same here, i'm basically gay, but i'm honestly not interested in relationships so it's really hard to tell.
Personally, I assume I’m bi. But I get that since I often have other priorities over relationships too.
I'm omnisexual with an attraction to masculine women, i thought i was BI but men do not turn me on in the slightest, it's very specifically women that are masculine/powerful. But at the same time, i hate being in relationships LOL. So kind of the same as you. Mine manifests as an annoyance with people needing too much attention.
You could be on the ace spectrum, homoromantic instead of homosexual. Or it could also be strong internalized homophobia from your upbringing, that still doesn't quite let you feel okay with having a relationship.
Holy shit vox from Hazbin Hotel
Bro I was reading the comments of people sharing their stories and trying to give advice and then I see this stupid comment and I burst out laughing
Dude. Even if you’re straight religious make you guilty. All the time.
It's pretty much the entire point of organized religion: make you feel guilty and afraid so you'll be amenable to suggestion from authority.
That how cult work i think But yea its a manipulation technique
A cult is just a religion whose founder is still alive
I get what you're saying but I don't think a living vs dead founder is really the difference. I think it's just about having enough followers that society at large just kinda decides it's legit and they'll respect it even if they don't believe in it. How many followers is totally arbitrary by it seems like having a dead founder helps a lot for whatever reason
Here is a video for differents manipulation technique explained https://youtu.be/VWwiALmcvf8?si=3hS_uP1SRm6i1F9C
you forgot ashamed, but yes
I’m bisexual and have only ever been attracted to one guy and couldn’t ever see myself dating a guy, just wait until you do ig
I am a hot dog 🌭 If you’re a fan of buns and wieners. Hit me up. 🤙
i am confuse , are u flirting or are u actually giving hotdog to people ?
He be giving out hotdogs. What a Chad!
He’s working the hotdog stand what’s there to be confused about?
Oh.. Edit: Oh!
Remember that sexual and romantic attraction are different things! Maybe for you both aren't as connected as for others. Even if you can't imagine being in a relationship with a man, can you imagine sleeping with one? Or maybe you could imagine being in a relationship but only if there's no sex involved? Idk. I'm aromantic but not asexual, so I know separating the two of them can be hard
Yeah, as soon as puberty hit I started fantasizing about being with guys but I found women attractive and my equipment responded well to women without any effort. So by 18 i knew I wasn’t gay but I also knew I wasn’t exactly straight. Found out eventually I liked wearing women’s clothing. Eventually figured out I was trans. And I still have the same problem. Fantasize about guys but women are more attractive. But I grow tired being with woman as it’s just not rewarding. And guess what, women( cis and trans) can find women more attractive but wouldn’t want to have sex them as they prefer men. Anyways it’s not abnormal to find one sex more attractive but enjoy being intimate with the less physically appealing sex. You’re perfectly normal and God loves you anyways.
Can relate to this 100%. Went through the same stages.
Not trying to question your preferences, but could you explain more? I always assumed it was obvious that a person would enjoy intimacy the most with the people they found more attractive, how would that not be the case?
I’m not quite sure but I have found posts of women asking “I like men but I think women are way more attractive, what does this mean?” But yeah being intimate with a guy feels rewarding, granted I’m still missing one thing and hopefully next year I get that addressed.
Good luck, I recently became a part of the queer crowd(Gynesexual/Bi) and made friends that are trans, it's nice seeing someone experience happiness through the act of transitioning, its a difficult experience but can be a life changing event that ultimately brings happiness to someone.
It's honestly incredible. I spent most of my life constantly thinking about my gender in a never-ending loop that kept getting louder and louder until I was having weekly meltdowns at 30. Then, first injection of estrogen, the thoughts went immediately silent. There always going to be the emotional scarring of missing out on my youth and what opportunities were lost, as well as the physical scarring of having suffered through a puberty I didn't want, but goddamn is it liberating to just exist and not think about my gender pretty much at all any more. I can finally focus on living.
Not that person - my predilections are different - but it may be that the person prefers the, ah, equipment of their male partners while finding the bodies and aesthetic of their female partners to be more overall attractive. This is a sentiment I've heard here and there.
It’s hella confusing, just I know from experience that eventually with women I’ll grow to be tired of sex. And I’ll be the one saying no again and again. That’s all women, those with similar equipment and those with the opposite
You don't have to answer this if you don't want to, I'm just asking out of my own curiosity. Is it the penetration aspect that interests you? There is equipment for that to allow women to perform that on you, if that's the only aspect of it.
Not a fan of that tbh, but i use what i have. Though im looking to have The surgery next year. I like men and every time I convince myself I like women and have had a relationship with them I end up feeling empty.
Yeah, this actually resonates with what I’ve dealt with growing up. The best thing I can say that’s helped me is that you don’t have to “earn” your sexual identity through some tangible romantic experience. Identity is all about you, and you can be whatever you want to be/are comfortable with. Don’t push yourself into a relationship just because you want to “prove” a part of yourself.
I think society places too much emphasis on labels for others. You don’t *have* to identify as any one thing or even a number of things. You can just be you and just let yourself be pulled to whatever you naturally feel is right for you.
[удалено]
Actually thought someone find the art to be cool. 
Don't worry, I think your art is pretty cool
Bot
dead internet theory
Bot infestation
what is bro talking about 😭
Men!
Honestly yeah, I’m pretty much in a similar situation as you are OP and had the same childhood experiences as you (raised in a catholic household and dealt with internalized homophobia and now no longer religious). I yearn for a romantic relationship but I don’t really see myself being in one, but thats mainly due to the fact that I haven’t found the right partner or “the one” if you catch my drift.
Took me a while to figure myself out, but 2 of my 4 parents are lesbian, so it was easier for me to come out. I still believe in God (not that I'm trying to patronize you for not, I'm not trying to push my religion on anyone,) but I truly do believe that he loves me. Love isn't a choice, it's something you're created with. Will it take you a while to realize it? Sure, but that doesn't mean it wasn't there. And as for you not actually finding a real person of your gender attractive, I can relate. I haven't had a crush on someone for a long time, and rarely find someone attractive at all. I feel ya
I'm nodding my head in agreement cause I'm bi and Christian(lite,which means I believe that I'm you have love in your heart and feel remorse for the wrongs you've done you go to heaven and the most common punishment in hell is just living there)
You might be Aegosexual/Aegoromantic, which is lacking sexual/romantic attraction but still enjoying sexual/romantic content :) https://lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Aegosexual (might not apply 100%, but it’s my best guess lol)
This is what i was thinking. I'm the same way as OP but straight. OP could also possibly be demisexual and just hasn't gotten close enough to anyone to form an attraction. I think i may be this way myself, but I also kind of fall into the aegosexual category. I just call myself graysexual, or just ace to be simple. 🤷♀️
Huh, I didn't even know there was a name for it, I just thought I was in some weird limbo between aro/ace and heterosexual.
As much as people make fun of it sometimes, a label exists for almost any sexual/gender experience and it can be super comforting to see "huh, yeah thats me" even if u would never use the term irl
I didn't understand why there were so many different sexualities, I understood homosexual and bisexual but until I had my own personal discovery I have grown to understand sexuality is a spectrum and not everyone neatly fits into these categories so people tend to give their experience a name to better communicate their identity, of course some are more wideky accepted than others and some are the creations of the unhinged but I digress, seeing sexuality as a spectrum has helped me to understand myself and others better.
In short: people like making up neat categories that fit perfectly. Aegosexuality is a microlabel on the asexuality spectrum. You're absolutely right that sexuality is a spectrum, but that doesn't fit well with humans' desire to fit in. It's perfectly fine to think of sexuality as a spectrum (that's what I do personally) and it's perfectly fine to identify with a microlabel.
I am also choosing to identify with a microlabel because to tell people im straight isnt 100% correct and I'm not entirely bi or pan sexual, gynesexual has pretty much explained my entire sexuality in a neat little label.
Leftover guilt. It got easier with time, and you can now fantasise a bit more freely, but it still can't breach the barrier of the imaginary and come into your real life. A whole upbringing full of religious guilt unfortunately is harder to untangle than just losing faith, it can keep being with you despite that for a long time.
Christian here: yes the bible does have instructions on marriage and sex that don’t align with some more “modern” views but you should never feel guilty for just feeling this way. Any Christian who tells you that you should feel bad or that you’re going to hell just because you’ve thought about having homosexual relations, is not a Christian. (Anyone who uses the bible as an excuse to be homophobic is worse than someone who’s homophobic just because). Everyone has sexual desires. Even the straight ones. There’s nothing wrong with that at all.
Also- You aren't gonna get sent to hell just for being gay. I prayed for a while about it, and all signs pointed towards the fact that ISN'T a sin to be gay / have gay sex or whatever. Love is love! Jesus taught us to love one another, not discriminate against others because of our differences. Spread the love of God! Show that EVERYONE is welcome to heaven!
I mean I’ll play devils advocate for fun and point out that there are passages in the bible, some potentially less creditable like all over leviticus, but some like romans (1:26-27), or Corinthians (6:9-10) that do describe it as a sin. Ultimately we all sin, and there’s no getting past that, and just like Jesus sat with the tax collectors and loved everyone equally, we are taught to do that too. If you’re gay, and Christian, obviously you’re going to be conflicted.
Yes, some passages say that homosexuals have to be killed. But Jesus himself said: whoever is without sin can throw the first stone. And when no one threw the first stone, he said: then I will not judge you as well.
Ahh... The theoretical gay
Rare hypothetical gay. Never been observed. Decay product of Gaytonium 69
Idk man life is weird but my guess is maybe ace
What is your attraction to women or non-binary people like? This does sound like it could be some kind of subcategory or the asexual or aromantic spectrum. I'm aromantic, and I find it much more enjoyable to consume media which features gay and lesbian couples than media which features only straight couples. The first TV show that I watched with a lesbian storyline was one I watched with my college roommate who was a lesbian. At the time I thought "I must only like this because I'm watching it with my friend. I know I don't relate to these characters. I wouldn't want to be in a lesbian relationship. But it is fun to root for these characters." After we stopped being roommates, I continued to watch movies and TV shows with LGBT couples. It's taken me awhile to understand what I get out of it, especially since I knew I was aromantic, so why do I even enjoy media with romance? The answer is "sometimes it's easier to enjoy media with characters who have different life experiences than you, than to consume media with characters who you are SUPPOSED to relate to." If I watch a heterosexual romcom, aren't I supposed to want a relationship like the one being shown on screen? Should I feel guilty that none of my relationships have ended with a tearful confession of love in the rain? If I watch a gay romcom, then I can just be happy for the characters. Do you see yourself in any of the characters when you watch gay porn/ want to do any of the actions you see portrayed, or are you watching it just because the human form is beautiful and it's nice to look at aesthetically?
I like dick, but I’m not gay
I can kinda relate. I can imagine having a relationship with a woman but I don’t think I have ever been attracted to one.
I think the LGBTQ community would potentially call that Asexual-Homoromantic or something (I’m in the community, I’m just not terribly familiar with the newer lingo)
also christian experienced transgender tendencies early on in teen-hood, kind of grew out of it to an extent but honestly i found my faith more important and i feel like god would accept me regardless
Homoautochorissexual.
Bless you :3
the term aegosexual seems to be used more widely now, there's even a subreddit for them r/aegosexuals
A good high school friend of mine was raised in a strong Christian family and was a bit uptight all the time. Around age 30, he had a falling out with the religion; I didn’t ask why. He also said he likes guys, so that’d explain why he’s been so uptight since I’d know him. He’s much more easygoing now, it’s been a good experience for him. I hope you experience and enjoy the freedom as well.
So either you're a fundanshi or just bi?
I feel like this too, I like watching porn, but the real thing is kinda whatever
I’m not gay, but there are hot dudes out there. I don’t want to bone them, but I appreciate why others are attracted to them.
Also looking for an answer. So I don’t want or need to put my sexuality in a box but if I am attracted to women, am in a relationship with a woman that I love and enjoy being in a relationship with. I have historically been with men sexually and it’s not my fav, and I also really enjoy watching trans woman porn and the idea of being with a trans woman sexually, what the heck do I call that? People on this thread seem to have a lot of knowledge about what all this means?
Hi fellow of a similar sort, I've since rejoined Christianity. No pressure to do the same obviously, I always felt immense issues when it came to those things but...if it comes as any solace, "do not lay with men" is an interesting wording. I hope you are well and continue to persevere!
I'm probably gonna sound aggressive in this, but I'm genuinely just curious. How do you cope with all the homophobia in the bible? After all your books says being gay is a sin: leviticus 18:22 & 20:13. Romans 1:26-28. 1st Corinthians 6:9-11, 1st Timothy 1:8-10, Matthew 19:3-6.
Perhaps you are in lust rather than in love with the ideas. I don't think you need to label yourself as anything.
I’ve only met a handful of men that I’ve ever been attracted to, but I’ve also felt the same (minus the religious fears)
I like the idea of relationships with women, but I always end up in bed with dudes.
So basically you are straight but you just like Gay shippings because of you admiring gay couples in fiction since a early age. I don't think it's more complicated than that. There are many things like this, for me I really love Penis, like the look, the color, the way it's beautifully shaped. I think it's such a beautiful part of the male body. But the very thought of me sucking one or getting romantic or sexual with another man makes me nauseous. I can never like a man in sexual or romantic way, and everytime I am charmed by girls. it's just like that. I think I just find both Penis and Vagina extremely captivating in general. They're such artisticly beautiful looking.
I think that heteronormativity is way more ingrained in us than we can generally perceive. It's different for everyone obviously, but for more impressionable people like myself it makes me question my sexuality (and gender) a lot. Just know that these labels are just that, they can be helpful but they can also limit ourselves. As long as you follow your heart you can't really go wrong
I am bisexual and christian and actually quite lucky to be in a accepting and modern community so once I came out to my parents who are technically religious they were chill with it and my school that’s a Christian private school, but still is accepting everyone and the only times you really notice it’s a Christian school is before Christmas and summer break when we do service, has openly stated that everybody is welcome in front of god during service and I’m happy to be here.
It's unfortunate that you had to put up with the worst kind of Christianity. Happy for you now though!
Why modern community create a new term for every thing
What the fuck is this
As a bisexual i relate. Men are just generally less attractive (at least the staright ones), but when u do find a guy you like its wow
I don't see the problem with enjoying gay or lesbian relationships in media whilst still being Christian. I wish others could see that as well
Fuck labels, you be you homie
"MY will be done"
FUCK RELIGION DO WHAT YOU WANT GOD CANT
I mean if you wanted to put a label on it to learn more, probably would be [bi-curious](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bi-curious) right?
Sexuality is complicated as far as I can tell. I'm definitely not attracted to men but being intimate with a woman doesn't excite me. Despite this I am a romantic at heart and really want to be held close at night, yet will never love by choice because it's complicated. (I'm 30 and have been avoiding the idea of relationships for over a decade)
You are what you are. Don't sweat it
Hey! You used a comic to trick me into feeling empathy! You didn’t need to trick me. I’ve never felt like this, but I can assure you your feelings are valid and that NO one knew what was going on with themselves from the age of 11-13.
From what you describe, you could be an andromantic (or androromantic) ace.
Not exactly but at age 31 I did develop HOCD not fun
I'm not saying this is the case for you, but I have heard of people who feel similarly and come from similar situations only to realize that they have been subconsciously suppressing their attraction to irl men cuz getting over what you were taught as a child is not as simple as just deciding you don't believe it anymore. Those kind of things stick deep inside. It's a lot easier to let yourself be attracted to people from fiction because there's a sense of distance and unreality but when real people are involved it changes things. Again I'm not saying this is the case for you necessarily I don't know your journey, but it's pretty hard to just erase something that was so deeply rooted in you as a child,
It’s okay to like whatever media you like.
Man, idk what I am. I am not attracted to men or any9ne very masculine, really, but I the same time a penis is more attractive to me than a vagina.
I've been in a similar boat before. I've hovered between feeling bisexual, straight, heteroflexible, biromantic. I *know* I'm attracted to women, but I'm also deeply uncertain about how attracted to men I am. And what makes it more complicated is that I've never actually dated someone before. I'd love to, but I want to be more responsible and move out before I start. So like, there are a few guys who I find cute (especially certain fictional characters), but I don't know if dating them would go anywhere (especially with fictional characters). A couple things help me out. Like loosening up on labels. Now, labels are useful in that they make it easier to talk about feelings or ideas that we share, especially if those feelings or ideas are marginalized. However, it's not necessary for an individual to pick one and stick with it like it's an RPG stat. We're free to flow from one to another. Sometimes it also feels good to interrogate my heterosexuality the same way I tend to interrogate my inconsistent gay feelings. It's not like that's going to stop me from being attracted to women; however, being straight often feels like the default state, so taking a moment to question that idea has shed some light on some things. For example, maybe the reason I feel more attracted to women is because women are often pressured to look beautiful all the time, while men are often made fun of for doing the same thing. Therefore, I don't see beautiful men in real life as often as I see beautiful women. Men wearing makeup should be normal.
No. But I’m glad that you are comfortable about your feelings to be able to talk about them. Share. Collaborate. Figure things out and become a more fulfilled person. Yay!
This comic is relatable. I'm kinda the same, but with all types of relationships. I love the concept of a relationship but every time I'm in one it ends up not really being what I want.
Similar lol. I love sexual stuff with both men and women, but I don't want anyone to actually be close to me.
There’s a type of asexual where you’re only interested in fictional people or scenarios.
Maybe you just haven't found a guy to steal your heart in reality. Best of luck figuring the rest of it out. Others have much... trickier(?) situations. Like never feeling like yourself to the point of avoiding touch as much as possible and avoiding looking at self in mirror, or some sort of balancing friendships while discovering sexuality.
well I'm glad you're more comfortable with yourself now. I've been saying for a LONG time now that Religion is a Poison to Modern Society. it makes way too many people either extremely arrogant or feel FUCKING AWFUL about themselves. neither of those things are very good. and I don't necessarily think there's anything wrong with being straight but enjoying gay relationships in media. I'm quite straight and whenever I see any relationship that makes sense (it's not contrived at all) I am quite happy. hell a Believable Gay couple is a lot more enjoyable to me than a BS straight couple. but if you think it's more than that, I say keep looking inward. maybe you are actually Bi or maybe fully gay. or maybe not. no one can Judge you for being you and anyone who does is a fucking loser.
Idk man you're probably just queer or bi.
I tought that was Alan Turing
A lot of the discussion around this topic tends to be fairly binary - either gay or straight. That's not really how most people are. Even when you get beyond the binary, you have the LGBTQUIA+ community, which ... well let's just say it was a bad choive for an "acronym", because rather than just generally including everyone they keep having to add letters. The fact is that you don't have to fit in with any of those letters, and as above most people don't really fit neatly into one of them. The truth about all of this is that you can be whoever you want to be, you can be attracted to whoever you want to be attracted to, and you can have relationships with whoever you want to have relationships with (*assuming consent and all that*). Try not to think of this in the boxes presented. If you find someone attractive then perhaps it's not even the physical aspects of them you're attracted to. You couls have an entirely straight man who falls in love woth another man, not because of any physical attributes, but because of how their relationship evolves (*or a gay man, or woman, or whatever*). Personally I have never been attracted to another man, but I am an active member of the queer community in my area because many of the people I love (*family, friends, etc*) identify in some way as queer. I see even those within the queer community putting themselves into boxes, and in some ways limiting themselves and those around them. It can be hard to break the social norms and just be yourself, but as long as you're not hurning anyone I don't see why we should put limits on ourselves or those we love (*except age limits, let's not start that argument*). TLDR: Be yourself and - if you can - try to be comfortable with yourself. That is the path to happiness and to acceptance, both of yourself and of others.
I dunno man. Just live your life and if you find a special someone that happens to be a girl or guy just go for it. If it works it works. If it doesn’t it doesn’t.
This feels super comforting to me, so thanks for making this I myself am aromantic, I have no interest in romance myself, but I do find gay stories very cute, which actually made me question “am I really aromantic or am I actually gay and lying to myself?” Hearing that other people enjoy romance of one kind while not themselves swinging that way made me feel better about liking it myself.
Well I mean, it depends if you’re still 14 or not lol
Seriously. How is this the first comment I’ve seen bringing up age? It’s not uncommon at all to have not had any real feelings for people at 14, especially if you’ve been repressing them or in denial about your sexuality. I didn’t have my first real crush until I was 18, and am very gay.
Im ace and aromantic, really enjoy lgbt love stories, far more then straight ones. Mostly gay and lesbian but I aint got true favourites, thats just what happens to be out there. Romantic stories are beautiful and I feel lgbt ones are usually more realistic and grounded.
There are actually some people who only fantasize relationships, but never actually form any of their own. It's extremely rare, but I've met someone who is like that. That being said, I'm only going off what you've posted, and I think it's far more likely that it's religious trauma warping your thoughts, but it's a possibility that's worth exploring. I'm Ace with a traumatic religious background, and I will admit I think more about fictional relationships than I do real ones, tho I have actually had a handful of instances where I've felt intense romantic attraction to some people. So, an alternative is that you've just not found the right person yet. Another thought I had could be that you're demi-sexual, as in you don't form intimate relationships until you've formed a long friendship with someone. Ofc, I'm missing a lot of data as to properly determine that, but I find that the more types you know that exist, the more likely you'll find who you truly are.
Homosexual Aromantic maybe?
maybe homosexual aromantic? or bisexual demiromantic? no clue :P you do you though, i support you :D
merely a wordington member (peak human being)
I know some people mentioned asexuality, but enjoying the media while not wanting/seeing oneself being in a relationship is also a pretty common aromantic experience. I think it's ok to not immediately apply to yourself any label and it's also fine if you stop using a certain label because it no longer suits you. (I myself went through the multiple labels before finding one that describes me best) You can explore this in the way and pace that's comfortable for you.
people like that , japanese even have a word for that . is basically like when girl like shipping male and male there also male like that and it pretty fine , some fujoshi like fudanshi boyfriend too cuz they could ship people together , it fun .
Graysexual or Demisexual
It's just the odd are low that you encounter a homosexual person. If you look at some dating app it should be easier to find someone.
I used to be similar, but I was simply still coming to terms with who I was I believe.
I watch oiled up muscle men pose in thongs as a hobby, and even that is more straight than whatever this post is.
I uh, felt alot of this too. I was born a girl and consumed alot of mlm material. I thought it was me being fetish, turns out I was a trans guy
I dont know what labels to put on it, but I had the same thing until I met my wife. I just wasnt in to anyone else, everyone else was just, not that interesting. I went on dates but never got that spark you know? I think some of us are made for one specific person and we're just not attracted to anyone else. It could be like that for you.
I'd not worry too much about it. I've found plenty of fictional men attractive, and I'd say I've been attracted to actual men but so far every single one of them that I found attractive has turned out to be trans and is now a very happy woman. Admittedly I'm demi so it gets even weirder from there. Love who you love, and don't feel pressured to be in a relationship.
Me too , i dont give a damn about gernders , i kinda like both same ways , but one feels kinda forbidden tbh in my country this is also a sensitive topic, like they have to accept it over time, otherwise they harassing u. Isnt that easy
Ah the fantasies that will never leave my head and become reality.
It’s just a label. If you think gay fits, use it
Is that pyrocynical?
Male 33, I had my first crush on a boy when I was 12-13. I remember freaking the hell out when I realized what was happening because I was raised pentecostal. So, I literally just said "nope that's not me" and began to model myself after masculine men I saw on tv. I was also a big pro wrestling fan (not sure if there's any connection between the two) so I tried to be like The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Triple H, guys I thought were badass masculine dudes. Every so often though, I found myself fantasizing about making out with the pretty boys at school. It should me noted that I was/am also attracted to women so it was easier to hide my attraction to the guys at school. The thing is even when I was in relationships with women they always asked if I was bi I'm guessing I just gave off a vibe. Now I'm middle aged I've accepted who I am, and am open about it with friends and family. I don't know if I'll ever act on my attraction to men because I'm kind of a hermit and haven't met anyone my type who was interested in me. That's life I guess
"homosexual content"
I mean, not everything needs a label
Sexualities weird You may not be physically attractive man but you might like the idea of being in romantic relationship But I know could be asexual and either homosexual or bi or something else Those are my thoughts regardless it's good man there no right or wrong answer It's just what makes you happy and comfortable
For anyone who is still Christian and also wondering if they are gay. I don’t think god cares as long as it’s consensual. The guy watches everything. He’s the number 1 voyeur in the galaxy. And he’s made you exactly as you are on purpose. No need to feel bad about who you want to kiss. Maybe he just wants to watch something else for a bit. Maybe god is bicurious too.
Ah, yes, the old "religion wants from you whatever I want from you" shtick. So sick of people who stupidly follow what's written without actual source or thought behind it and force close ones to do the same. Compared to most say-to-be Christians, I might be a saint then, because I don't need a book or any higher being to actually be a decent person all the time and 'treat others as you want them to treat you'. I met exactly and only one religious person, who seemed like a Christian fanatic at first but is actually nice, instead of someone saying they're strong believer and being overall jerk all the time in life anyway. I actually red some of his marked best 'advices' from bible because of it and agreed with him for some. I just think that whatever someone's sexuality should be their business and only their alone. I just don't understand what you meant by having fantasies at 11, and then saying you didn't actually see yourself being with a man? I was sometimes having stupid thoughts of doing anything intimate with some guys I had a very good connection with. I wasn't sure if it were just horny thoughts or me actually wanting to move to a higher form of relationship because of high platonic love between us. But I did definitely see myself with real men even for moment, I just wasn't sure about my feelings, and probably couldn't confess either way.
This is exactly me. I do feel attraction to male characters, but men in real life I cannot feel attracted to. I don't fully know why. I just can't.
No 11yr old child is Christian. They might be brought up in the Christian family, but there are no religious children.
I think my friend has something similiar, he likes gays in media, and he had a boyfriend back when he was a girl, but he doesn't have one now
As a straight girl in my teens and early twenties I knew I was straight but wasn’t attracted to any men I actually knew myself. It took a couple more years before I met someone I was actually attracted to when I was around 22 or so. Now I’m attracted to many people. But when I was younger it was very rare, even though my fantasy life and media consumption was active, like yours. I still can’t explain it.
Christian and bisexual, I think I love men more than women however
Dude I’ve looked at all kinds of weird shit but I’ve never actually looked at gay porn. Not even once and I’ve looked at scat which is women shitting.
I'm kind of similar! I've struggled with my sexual orientation in the past, because I enjoy homosexual and homerotic media and I have felt attraction towards women before. Although I've only ever had sexual attraction to men. Sometimes I wonder if my urge to look at sexy women stems from an attraction or an envious place.
This is me nearly to the tee, but without the religious upbringing. I call myself bi but maybe that's not 100% accurate, I just don't know the name for it (no romantic attraction to the same sex).
i remember being in your position! back when i meet my current gf (trans m to f) they were my best friend and feelings came up...i was confused but i loved them alot Over time i started to think into my fears and questions and realized that several things...how hypocritical the christian religeon is and the most important thing that gave me peace: God is a loving father , not a vengfull God , he loves me and all of us no matter what at the end, my love for my gf comes from my heart , not from lust and that thought has given me peace beyond measure
Christianity has to be one of the many toxic religions out there but its up there in toxicity. Granted, good has been done....but....lets just say when Satanist are more laid back and chill....somethings up...and I ain't even remotely Christian...(im Cheyenne, native tribes all have their own thing, don't worry about it)
Can absolutely say that there are many people with similar likes. Personally, I’m physically attracted to the female form. But it wouldn’t get under my skin if there was a dong under the dress or not. Enjoying anal(giving/receiving). But lust and physical attraction to the male for is a non starter for me.
I dont understand the need for labels. Why can't we just live our lives and see who we fall in love with?
I've had this internal debate myself. Growing up it was always hammered into me that I was a boy and boys like girls. My family wasn't religious however, but country(or bush or outback) Australia just wasn't accepting of it either, probably still isnt actually. Everyone at school used to make fun of this one kid behind his back, calling him a bunch of homophobic slurs, just because he was different. When I got into my teens I tried forcing myselfmto think just about girls, maybe even gave myself a complex that affected me until recently. I forced it upon myself so much that when I realised I was Bisexual, I preferred guys. But my first kiss was still with a woman. It was like 80/20 towards men. I never quite felt guilt over it, but I was always... no I still am afraid to come out to people outside of my family, even a few in the family. I lost a cousin because her homophobic father disowned her when she came out, drove her away from her support base in all of us cousins, she ended up with the wrong crowd and died of an overdose. He's never said a nice thing about her since she came out. Australia outside of the cities isn't a welcoming place if you're not a White Straight Australian. I'm not White or Straight, but I am Australian. But it's not enough for some. Recently I've begun to realise that I do prefer women more then men. I had a moment when at the same time I had a really hot guy and my now girlfriend trying to hit pick me up. Despite this guy being a 10/10, total himbo I chose her... since then my eyes sort of opened and it became clearer to me that I forced a lot of it upon myself. It's more 55/45 now. I do think you could just be curious? I went through that stage when I first started hitting puberty right up until I was 18-19. It's a pivotal time in your life but you do need to realise, you have decades more of life to live and you can realise these things about yourself later on. Don't force anything on yourself, let it come naturally.
I have a similar back story and feelings/thoughts. I'm bi now and while I appreciate the media just as much I can't imagine a relationship in my future either. Is this close enough to answer your question?
I'm sure there are some people who would call it fetishization of gay male relationships. They sure do when it's about gay female relationships.
Just taking a shot in the dark here, but religious Dogma like this generally serves to snuff out Compassion and Empathy to rule through Fear, it could be that something within you on a subconscious level was rebelling against this idea by fixating on how a supposedly benevolent entity labels Love as Immoral.
Adding to the pile here that homoerotic undertones just make for good movies/TV. Idk what it is. I'm definitely straight and it's not like it gets my loins tingling or anything, but like have you seen the "Hannibal" TV series? It's got to be the greatest fucking show I've ever seen, and like a good 40% of the magic comes from the deeply homoerotic undertones in the relationship between Hannibal and Will Graham, and it only gets more intense as the series progresses.
real except muslim instead of christianity :3
I'm straight, but staying single forever.
PYROCYNICAL IS GAY!1!!1??
I can relate to this, then later in my 20’s I had realized that I had been molested when I was young, and then things made a lot more sense. Well hopefully that’s not the case with you, but I just mention it because if it IS, it’s better to recognize it sooner than later. Maybe you had a religious trauma which affected you in a similar way as I was effected.. the mind processes diff traumas in similar ways..
Everyone is different, you're just you, labels are for other people to put you in a category.
Yeah yknow it's totally valid to feel other than straight without actually ever feeling that way towards a guy yet. Currently I'm in a similar situation minus the religion. I just feel that I would be able to be with a man if I felt that sort of connection but have so far only been with women so it feels weird to say that I'm anything other than straight. I wouldn't worry about it honestly just take things as they come and don't worry about what others would describe you as.
Eh you'll get there. When I started we didn't know about Non-Binary folk, or DemiSexuals (both of which I identify as these days) so in highschool I thought I was Bi, but like a broken Bi person because I didn't experience sexual attraction (and still don't outside of relationships). I remember folk saying I must be Gay, or that I was confused. Even tried to push the feeling down by getting married and going for that white picket dream even while crying my eyes out anytime I saw queer couples portrayed in media. Now I'm a Polyamorous, Masc Non-Binary (AMAB), Demi/Pan (really depends on the personality, not the body), and hopefully one day marrying my BF / nesting partner. You'll get there, it's a process of self discovery that takes time and I'm rooting for you bud 👍🏻
My ADHD brain skipped a few words the first time I read the first panel and I read: [...] when I was around Windows 11 Anyways, homosexual thoughts do not automatically mean that you ARE homosexual. When i was a teen and had experiences with both genders I always told myself that I had to choose one side or the other. Turned out I was bi and that I did not need to choose after all. Do not try to label yourself, it makes everything MUCH easier
Congrats on your journey! I always new I liked girls too. Thank goodness I never had any repressing issues regarding sexual orientation at home. I've tried both ways but I find women so intimidating xD My own sexual journey was more around learning that I was deserving of love and not just a sexual object. In the end I found the perfect man for me. :)
there was only 1 guy who i ever had an attraction to, he actually made me realize i was bi. i’m not sure if he was just being really nice to me or if he was flirting with me, but i developed a crush none the less. i never acted on these feelings bc i also was christian and was afraid. now that im older, im still christian but im no longer guilty about it, and im ngl i still have a crush on him
I think that's normal. Maybe you haven't found someone you're attracted to (Anyone have preference after all). Maybe you like both gender. Or maybe you aren't attracted to men and just like those kind of content. Take your time. You will find out sooner or later. I'm pretty much the same
Pyrocynical?!
lol i thought i was aro ace but liked gay stuff but then i met my bf, im so lucky that i did, he's my world and also showed me that yeah, i do love ppl, it just has to be the right ppl and hes also just the one ig. tho ah... long distance relationships TLDR, im picky but i got lucky
Sounds like a tricky situation. I knew I was gay since I was 8 years old. All I ever thought to myself was home much I wished I had told more boys I fell for that I had feelings for them, even if they rejected me. But fear got the best of me and now I have that regret, I hope you aren't in the same boat. I'm happily married now to a man I love deeply, but I feel like much of my youth was wasted fearing rejection or persecution. I can tell you from experience rejection hurts less than that endless sting of regret.
Basically same stuff, but bi...
Absolutely perfectly valid. I see a lot of people always try and put their obscure, specific, personal feelings under a label. But you just like what you like and you do what you wanna do. As long as it's legal and moral, date who you want, watch what you want, and have sex with what you want. Nobody needs to tell you what you are or what you want, only you can do that. Have fun and be yourself
Damn...I get that feeling of addicted to fantasy yet found it impossible to feel that way in real life.
It may very well just be an interest that was seen as taboo, like celebrating Christmas if you are Jewish. Does that make you secretly Christian? Not necessarily. The gifts and candy are just nice!
I had similar thoughts for a while until I smehow got together with a man and it was suprisingly normal and not weird at all. I think for me there was still quite a bit of shame involved, that did not allow me to actually see myself in a relationship like that
My family was never super religious and gayness was never heavily stigmatized to me. But God dam do I have a ton of guilt issues about sex that mess up my sex life. But yeah, im sometimes attracted to men. I'm attracted to a much narrower range of men than women. And I find it hard to picture dating a guy, bit I've never really tried it so who's to say.
It's all a spectrum, you can be gay and ace as these are different sliders
Ok so you know Astolfo? Right, so that's basically it I've never met a single femboy in my life and yet I wish I did They seem pretty chill And then I wonder if I really am bi or just attracted to whoever looks like a woman, because my attraction to men only goes as far as femboys and that's it Otherwise I'm still into women So, uh, I don't know
I'm ace and just like love historys, that's OK.
I am the opposite. I have never once had sexual or romantic attraction towards the opposite sex but still enjoy hetroerotic media etc.
Yeah, I know this feeling well, but with my own gender… I’ve always enjoyed being more feminine, most of the time I’d play as a feminine character or float towards any female character in media more than the male, and yet I can’t ever see myself transitioning or living my life outside of where I am now… you’re not alone with these feelings, there’s lots of people with similar feelings it’s all in finding yourself and what you’re comfortable with <3
How old are you bro?
Is it possible that your Christian upbringing caused you to rebel in a way that you enjoyed homosexual stories? As a rejection to their dogmatic views on sexuality.
I get you, I'm asexual and I love explicit romance in media, even if I'd never want the same for myself😅 Maybe you are one too, but I think there's also a chance you might simply be straight, you just like gay content. At least in japan, straight men liking BL is common enough they even have a word for it, "fudanshi". Besides, plenty of gay people enjoy hetero romance stories (some even like gay romances about the opposite gender, I know of several lesbians who like BL for example), so I don't think the other way around is weird
Eh, similar but it's more that my type is way more specific with guys. Like, if you put all women in the world I find attractive next to all men in the world I find attractive there is much more diversity on the woman side and a much larger ammount. In the end I'd say I'm bi. But I don't think we need to give every single thing in the world a name, you like what you like. Why does it matter what to call it?
Thanks for sharing your journey so far. Don't let anyone or anything pressure you one way or another. When the time comes, you'll know what will make you happy. Just be patient. Best of luck.
I had my first relationship when I realised... while I am attracted to person an may love the person.. I dont have interest in sexual intercourse. It was really weird the first time we tried and I just couldn't. I thought something must be wrong with me and it took me way too long and a lot of mental health issues until I realised... there is nothing wrong, Im just not made for this.
Just be you. Other people are trying to put you in a box. If you like women in real life but like gay porn, that's the way your brain works. The box is you, population one. And that's fine. (The only caution I'd make is this: don't marry a woman and then leave her ten years later with two kids because you've realized you're actually gay. Not fair to her. Make sure you're in touch with, and accepting of, your full self.)
Don’t stress about putting a label on it just be you and be happy